The 4 Stages Of Quitting Alcohol (95% NEVER Reach The Last Stage)

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Transcript

Welcome And Mission

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Welcome to the Stop Drinking Podcast, where we help you make stopping drinking a simple, logical, and easy decision. We help you with tips, tools, and strategies to start living your best life when alcohol free. If you want to learn more about stop drinking coaching, then head over to www.soberclear.com. There are four stages of quitting alcohol, and if you don't make it to the fourth stage, then you're gonna struggle for the rest of your life. That sounds harsh, I hate to say it, but after not drinking myself for seven years, after a decade of struggling and helping tens of thousands of people do it on this YouTube channel and over 500 private clients in my coaching program, the stages that I'm gonna break through are guaranteed to happen to everybody. Make it to the fourth stage and your life will change forever. If you stay stuck in the third or second stage, I don't think there's much help for you. But I'm gonna show you how to get to the fourth stage so you can make stopping drinking feel like the flick of a switch in your brain. If we've not met yet, my name is Leon Sylvester, I'm the founder of Soberclear.com. I created a system to help people stop drinking alcohol that gets a 96% client-rated success rate, and we've even had clients get results in under 24 hours. You can read about that in the academic paper. Just go to soberclear.com and go to the bottom, there'll be an academic report, or go to Google Scholar and search the word soberclear. The first stage of quitting alcohol is the honeymoon period. Everybody needs to go through this, but it's the stage of alcohol not causing any problems at all. For me, this was very short-lived. It was literally probably a few months maximum, but then I jumped to the second stage, which we'll get to. But during the honeymoon phase, the big problem here is that we'd been warned our entire life that alcohol was this dangerous thing, we shouldn't touch it, it's addictive, there's health problems, we finally drink it and nothing bad happens. Because when we're growing up, we get two kind of pieces of information that are competing. One side of it is talking about how alcohol is bad, you shouldn't drink too much, recommended daily allowance, all of this stuff. And then the other side is the adults around us that are drinking it. And it's very hard to make any sense of this. And even if your family and parents don't drink it, you'll see other people drink it. You'll see it on the TV, you'll see it in movies, and it's really hard to figure out what is alcohol. But then when you finally taste it and try it and get a bit giddy and something happens and whatever, you get some validation from your friends, you realize, ah, so this is what I was missing out on. This is what everybody is drinking it for. Now, because of the nature of alcohol, you don't really spend that long in this stage. So a lot of people, what they do is they continue to drink and fantasize about this honeymoon phase. It's like they're chasing something. I've been there. That's what I used to do. When I started drinking, I was talking to girls outside of my league. I got a bit of notoriety for drinking younger, and I chased that. I chased it. But anyway, this goes into the second stage. And the second stage are when problems start showing up. Now, again, it's progressive. I don't believe alcohol is a progressive disease, by the way. I just think this is the nature of what happens when you drink an addictive drug, and this can happen to anybody. I'm not labeling you, but it would be irresponsible of us to not think that drinking increases over time, because it does. So people go into this second stage and bad things start happening. And it gets worse and worse and worse. And usually around this point, this is when people will start using willpower. Let's say somebody has been drinking in the honeymoon stage, and then all of a sudden they've had a few hangovers, they've missed a day of work, they've upset their wife or whatever, they put on some weight, they don't feel great, they can see problems. And that's when the negotiations with ourselves start. Well, I'm gonna drink less this weekend. I'm not gonna go out this weekend, I'll just drink, you know, a little bit in a week, blah, blah, blah. Whatever it is. And we start using willpower to try and manage our drinking or set some limits and not drink for a certain amount of time. But we're still kind of close to the honeymoon phase where we're not 100% serious about changing forever. We're kind of just trying, attempting. There's no clear decision because often things aren't bad enough to warrant fully changing, but we don't want the pain that alcohol is causing. Many people live their entire life here as well. They know alcohol is bad for them, they know it's causing problems, they keep kind of saying I'm gonna stop and then starting again, and it's up and down. Now, it is possible to completely skip the third stage and go to the fourth stage, but that wasn't my experience. It's not most people's experience. Because most people that stay stuck in the second stage, they don't have any catastrophic event that causes them to actually go and face it properly. But that leads us to the third stage. And the third stage is when we're looking for actual methods. So in this stage, it's gone from just saying it in your head or maybe telling your wife you're not gonna drink, but in the third stage, you might actually be actively doing things. You might be going to AA, you might have tried a you know smart recovery meeting, you might have gone to your church, you might have been praying more, you might be going to a doctor saying, Listen, I need to end this. I can't seem to do it. People very rarely go from the honeymoon phase into stage three. Maybe it happens occasionally, or in the very early stages of stage two where someone just goes straight to a rehab, they might get a DUI and then just immediately stop. This can happen. But stage three is when people are looking for solutions and they're finding some success. Not always, but usually they're getting some sobriety time under their belt, they're maybe drinking less, and there are people that spend their entire life here. If you go to AA, I would consider you in stage three. Stage four is the next level, which we'll get to. But stage three is where you may or may not have fully stopped drinking. It's possible that you stopped, but you never actually changed the way that you view alcohol. You have to beg God to help you get through the cravings because you're getting cravings. I don't get cravings because I'm in stage four. The same way I don't crave fentanyl or I don't crave crack. I don't crave alcohol. But during my own experience, when I was in stage three, when I was going to AA meetings, when I was going to church begging God to help me, when I was in that stage, guess what happened? Well, I always wanted to drink because I never changed my worldview. I still saw alcohol was a good thing, so every time I saw it, I wanted to drink. So, stage four. What's stage four? Well, stage four is when you have changed the way that you view alcohol. What I did here is I broke it down into first principles. I studied the individual component parts of alcohol, of what it was, of why these traditional methods weren't working for me, and I got to a place where I didn't want to drink. Now I call this being sober clear. You're not sober, you're not stopping drinking, and you're certainly not trying to stop drinking. It's a change of heart. It's a complete shift in your mindset. And you know with absolute certainty that you're not going to drink. But the other thing in stage four is it's not just about that, because there are people in stage three who have made that shift. They might have read a popular stop drinking book and boom, that was it. But in stage four, there has to be another level. And the other level is building a life that you don't want to escape from. I'd had periods in stage three where I might have read a stop drinking book and then it motivated me to not drink for a few months. But then I'd change nothing. I'd change nothing about my life, I'd set no new goals, I'd I wouldn't make any extra effort. So of course, I ended up drinking again because it seemed to make no difference to my life. The big shift for me was when I fixed my paradigm, completely fixed my paradigm, and then I immediately went towards what I really wanted in my life. For me, that was starting an online business, right? Being able to do something that added value to people, make these YouTube videos, help people, coach people. And I've just got married, right? I'm training for a high rock race. I'm doing the things, I'm building the life that I wanted, and I'm not just making not drinking alcohol this huge focus of my life. See, stage four is about fixing your paradigm and just focusing on the future. Now, this is the exact approach that the sober clear system follows. It's about reframing alcohol, focusing on the future, and then in six months' time, you kind of look back at your life and think, why would I ever want to drink again? That is the ultimate goal of being a non-drinker. It's not saying to yourself, how long have I not drank for? It's saying to yourself, how could I ever want to drink again? Thanks for checking out the Stop Drinking podcast by Soberclear. If you want to learn more about how we work with people to help them stop drinking effortlessly, then make sure to visit www.soberclear.com.