Pig Butchering: You're the Pig
So I’ve got this friend. Let’s call him Wally. Wally is now in his 60s, and he’s had a great life. More than 30 years ago he got in a committed relationship with a wonderful person, someone who just took care of everything–the food, the bills, the house. Every time Wally got a paycheck, he just handed it over, and it went into the family pot. Wally himself never saw a bill, or a mortgage payment. I’m not even sure Wally has ever even seen the inside of a bank.
And by all accounts, this arrangement worked out fine for them, and they were very happy together for those many decades.
Then, sadly, two years ago, the love of Wally’s life passed away. And besides the sadness of this event, Wally was suddenly at risk. It’s not that his partner did anything shady–they genuinely loved each other, and all the finances were on the up and up all those years. But, that’s not the issue.
The problem is, Wally was left with a complete lack of knowledge of how anything works in the world, money, property, anything. If he gets a letter from the bank about a problem with his account, he goes into a panic and rushes down there, getting out of the car so fast that he leaves it unlocked and leaves valuables in it, and they get stolen. He didn’t realize, this wasn’t an urgent problem. Another time, he got a letter from the city about his house, and he freaked out because he was sure that bulldozers would come the next day and knock it over. He doesn’t realize that these things tend to move slowly. He doesn’t have to rush.
But during those frantic months, Wally fell victim to the Microsoft virus scam. Some person on the phone convinced him his laptop had a virus and he had to pay to get it removed, and he had to do it right now. The scammers stole his identity, and got a few hundred dollars out of him to.
Educating Wally has been an experience all on its own. I told him about the IRS scam, where someone calls you and says you owe taxes, and have to pay them right now, (preferably with gift cards), or the police will come and arrest you tomorrow. And Wally, he was amazed. He’d never heard of such a thing. (Clearly, Wally doesn’t listen to my podcast, or any podcasts at all, I don’t think, but I’m working on that.)
Back to the scams. The IRS scam, and many other phone scams, rely on the urgency of it all. “You have to pay now, or the police will come!” or, “Don’t hang up, or I won’t be able to help you!” They don’t want you to hang up and talk to a friend, who will likely tell you, it’s a scam.
This episode is not about these quick-and-urgent scams, where you lose a few hundred dollars. This one is about the slow burn, the long game, the one where you could lose hundreds of thousands of dollars. A scam that starts out very innocent, with people just chatting over the internet.
The scam is called Pig Butchering, a devastating type of scam that not only takes people’s money, but ruins their lives. And it goes on everywhere, every day. In this episode, we’ll unpack the steps of the Pig Butchering scam, and the reasons why people fall for it.
Knowing more about it you’ll be able to recognize it when you see it and keep yourself and your loved ones safe from this awful, awful scam.
The Pig Butchering scam starts like this: You meet someone online, almost at random. Like maybe it’s someone who liked one of your Instagram posts, or it might be a wrong number text. Whatever it is, the two of you start chatting.
And amazingly, it turns out the two of you have a lot in common. Same hobbies, same favorite movies. You swap stories about your day, you send each other funny memes. It gets to the point where you look forward to chatting with your new friend every night, knowing how understanding they are: Always ready to listen to you, never judging. For people who are a little lonely, it can be really nice to find a friend like that. Now your friend lives in a different city, far away from you, but you start to feel like you’re besties, anyway.
After sharing some laughs, and bonding over video games or sky diving or whatever you’re into, your new bestie starts talking about how they’ve been investing in this thing, and it’s been going really well. They don’t push for you to invest or anything, they just bring it up every once in a while. Like, “I just went on my first vacation in years, all thanks to this investment. Look at these amazing pictures from our trip to Bali!”
They just throw it into the conversation here and there, and wait for you to take the bait. Maybe you had a bad day at work, and you’re dreaming about quitting. Or you get hit with an unexpected expense like a car repair. Or you’ve been saving like crazy, but you still can’t afford a down payment on a house. And all of a sudden, that investment thing sounds… interesting.
So you do what they’ve been waiting for, you ask about it, and your friend responds right away. It’s easy. Just download this app, they say, and sign up. You just need to put in just a little personal information, maybe your social security number. And put your money in with a transfer from your bank account or debit card, ont a credit card, a debit card. And you’ll see, practically overnight, you’re gonna double your money. They show you some impressive-looking graphs, like stock market graphs, with the money just going up and up…
and UP.
You’re skeptical, but you figure, hey, why not try it out? So you put in a little bit, just $20. Chump change, what you’d spend on DoorDash anyway for some greasy comfort food after a rough day.
And the next day you log into the app, just to see what’s going on. And you see that you’re investment has doubled, you’ve got $40 in there. It’s amazing! You doubled your investment overnight. And this is actual money, not play money. You can transfer it into your bank account. And it’s for reals. Wells Fargo or Chase or whoever your bank is, they say it’s there. And you could go to an ATM and take it out. And maybe you do, and you check and see like yes, that money is actually there.
You are ecstatic. This, THIS is IT. You finally cracked the code. This is your golden ticket to the Willy Wonka Chocolate factory, your path to early retirement, to everything you ever wanted. A chance to show your family you’re not a loser after all. And your friend is just as excited as you are! You talk together about the daydream that with just a few more investments, you can quit your crappy job and live the life. Pay off your student loans, buy a house, maybe even open that cat sanctuary you’ve been dreaming about. Whatever your little heart desires.
Usually the investment is in some type of cryptocurrency, but it might be something else, some other “foolproof” investment scheme. Crypto is all over the news,you’ve seen it, and you keep hearing about these Bitcoin Billionaires. Now you finally get to be one yourself! And your friend might throw in a little urgency here, saying that the cryptocurrency is still new, so you should get in early while the gettin’ is good and the price is low.
So you double down. This time you throw in $2,000, and you see the graph run up and up and UP, and it’s worth $4,000 in no time. Then you put in $10,000, and the same thing happens. It’s amazing! And your friend keeps you daydreaming about all that money, and all the freedom it’s going to bring you.
Everything is going so great, and the conversations with your best friend are so fun! And one day, you have some exciting news to share: your job is sending you on a business trip to your friend’s city, so the two of you can finally meet in person. It’s gonna be so fun!
But oh no, it’s not going to work out. You see, your friend won’t be in town that week. It’s kinda sad, because they wanted to meet you, too. But oh well.
Now, somewhere around here, you start thinking about withdrawing some of the money to pay down a few debts, but your friend talks you out of it. Just keep putting money in, they say. It’ll just keep growing, and before you know it, you’ll be a millionaire.
Then they flash some pictures of their new boat, or expensive jewelry or designer clothes. Stay with it, your friend says. You’ll get there, too.
Next thing you know, you’re in for your entire life savings. When you’re tapped out, your very good friend encourages you to borrow more money to invest. Sell your car. Take out a loan. It’ll be worth it. And if you don’t, your friend says, they don’t think they can be your friend anymore, because it means you’re kinda stupid. You won’t get any more of those amazing conversations about Star Wars collectibles or Lego sets, or whatever you’ve been talking about. This adds that extra bit of pressure, because the friendship has become really important to you.
Before you know it, you’ve invested $200,000, and the value of your investment is edging towards a million. And you decide that’s it, you’re ready to cash out and start living the dream.
Your friend cautions you against this. You should leave the money in there until it doubles again, he says. But you know what you want, and you’re gonna do it. It’s time to pay off the student loans and start that… llama farm in Costa Rica, or whatever. Your life’s dream is about to become a reality.
But there’s a little problem. In order to cash out your money, the app says you have to pay a $2,000 processing fee. Your friend tells you this is normal. So you borrow the from your mom, and fork it over.
But now, there’s another problem. Because the investment is actually made overseas and the profit is more than $100K, the app says, there’s a tariff to pay before the funds can be released. And the tariff is 5% of your profits and it comes to $30,000. What? What? You have to pay $30,000 before you can get your money?
But that life-changing money is so close, you can almost taste it. And they paid out that $40 back when you started, right that was real money? And what do you know about overseas tariffs? It’s probably legit. So you scrape together the $30K. You cash out your 401K, or take out advances on all your credit cards.
After all, you’ll be rich in a few days, and you can pay it all off.
But then the app tells you there’s another snag, and another, and another. The money is being held up by customs. And now there’s a processing fee. Your online friend assures you that this is all normal, and in fact, they themselves just successfully cashed out $500,000 and bought a new house. See, look at the pictures!
By now you’re frantic. You pawn your TV and your grandma’s ring, and make the rounds of your friends and family to beg for just a few hundred bucks. After your brother tells you it’s a scam and refuses to give you anything, you start lying to everyone else about what the money is for.
And still, your big payout never seems to arrive. And then one day, the app stops functioning, and your online friend disappears. You can’t find them on any social media. They’re just… gone..
And when you’re completely tapped out, with no more options, deep in debt, with your whole family screaming at you to stop, the realization dawns…
You’ve been had.
What I just described is a classic Pig Butchering scam. And you’re. the. pig.
You arrive on the scene as a piglet, a complete innocent. And over time, the scammer “fattens you up” by taking money from you over and over and over. And when you finally realize you’ve been scammed, and won’t give them anymore money, you, the pig, are butchered by them. They go no contact. Thank you for your money, and goodbye.
Pig Butchering is real, and it’s rampant.
According to the FBI Cryptocurrency Fraud Report, victims lost a total of $5.6 BILLION, last year, from cryptocurrency scams, with most of the victims being from the United States.
While victims can be any age, even teenagers, the majority of victims are over 60, with a whopping $1.6B taken from that age group alone. And that’s just the crimes that were reported. Many victims are so ashamed that they never tell anyone.
The higher the age range, the larger the amount that’s been scammed. And it makes sense, in a way. Older people tend to have more money, basically their retirement savings, money they’ve saved up their entire lives, and they tend to be less internet-savvy. They’re often lonely, too, and an internet friend helps fill a void. So older people are the best kinds of targets, at least from a scammer’s point of view.
Some of these peoples’ stories have brought me to tears. Not only was their entire life savings taken, but they’re in debt now. And in trouble with their family. All because they trusted a new friend, they made online.
So what are the bits and pieces that actually make up the Pig Butchering scam? Let’s break it down.
It sounds so simple, you wonder “how could anybody fall for this?” But the scammer will often nurture the relationship over months, and the conversations can actually be very nuanced. It’s a long con, with the scammer probably juggling dozens of “friendships” at a time, on their end.
If Pig Butchering sounds a lot like a Romance scam, where the scammer pretends to be in love with the person they’re scamming, it’s because the Romance scam is Pig Butchering, just a specific kind. It follows the same playbook. “You’re so beautiful or handsome, I love you, but I just need a few bucks for this and that, and now I need more. I love you soooo much, and we’ll get married as soon as I finish up this big contract, but my money is all tied up right now.” Blah, blah, blah. Stringing them along until they stop paying.
A favorite version of this is, “I’m on an oil rig, and I can’t access my bank account. Can you get some gift cards and read me the numbers off the back?” Funny, you can reach me over the internet, but you can’t log into your bank’s website? And you don’t have a single friend or family member who can take care of this for you? Hmm.
The claim of working on an offshore oil rig is convenient because it provides lots of reasons to delay meeting in person, because the people that work there often go off for 5 or 6 weeks at a time.. It’s gotten so bad that people who actually do work on oil rigs hate these scammers for messing up their dating mojo. If they match with someone on Tinder, they have to lie about what they do for a living to even get a first date.
Pig butchering scams are just plain awful, no doubt about it. Some victims have even contemplated ending their lives over scams like this. Fortunately, most of the ones I’ve heard about have realized it’s not the end of the world, and they’ve figured out a way to get through it.
For many people, the hardest part is admitting they fell for a scam, and also realizing that their “friend” wasn’t really their friend. This part is hard. I commend everyone who’s gone through this, and has come out the other side. If you know someone like this, please give them some grace. They already feel stupid enough without you pointing it out.
So, what can you do about pig butchering scams?
If a friend or family member seems to be getting involved in an online friendship, ask them about it with curiosity, not judgment. “Your new friend sounds super interesting. When are you going to meet them in person? I’d love to meet them, too. What do you guys talk about?” While there can be online friendships and dating situations that are perfectly fine, any relationship that involves the exchange of money is super suspect, right out of the gate.
When someone is in the middle of being scammed, it can be really hard to convince them. They value their new friendship, and the pain of admitting they were wrong would be overwhelming. They’d rather just continue with the fantasy.
I’ve heard of friends and family stepping in even more strong here, like they say “hey, I’m going to be going to the same city where the scammer lives, and I’d like to meet them.” And, when the scammer says they’ll be out of town (which they inevitably do), keep offering to fly to wherever they are. Maybe, if your friend or family member sees that happening over and over, the scammer can’t be met in person, it might make a difference in their thinking.
For Wally, the one who doesn’t understand a thing about scams, I preemptively walked him through Pig Butchering, and pointed out all the red flags along the way to look for.
Reverse image searches can also be helpful. Take the photo the scammer sent, and do a search on it. Chances are, the photo is of some other person, maybe an influencer or model from some other country and TV star. But if the scammer was clever and used AI to generate the photo, you might not be able to find it that way.
Showing them your own Google search on the scam might make an impact, but only if approached with the attitude of letting them make up their own mind about it. Avoid the temptation of screaming “It’s scam! Why can’t you see it?” If you approach them more respectfully, they might not be receptive immediately, but maybe they’ll think on it, and hesitate before sending that next chunk of money.
When talking to a friend or relative about pig butchering, the important thing is to be supportive and not judgmental. Even if you 100% know it’s a scam, if your friend or family member is deep into it and doesn’t want to hear it, you can’t come at it with a combative attitude. Sometimes, you just have to let it go until they figure it out for themselves.
In the end, it’s their money, and they can do with it what they want. And if it’s giving it to a scammer, well, that’s what they’re gonna do.
At the very least, you can point them to this podcast. You never know, it might make a difference.
If you have a story about the Pig Butchering scam, we’d really like to hear it. Sometimes, hearing a true story will help others avoid the same fate. And that’s what it’s all about here, avoiding scams. You can tell me about it by messaging me on our Patreon, and we might even feature it on a future episode.
This is Michele Bousquet from How Hacks Happen, hoping you never get pig-butchered. In fact, I hope you never resemble a big fattened-up pig, ever.
Special thanks to Katie Haze of Katie Haze Productions for producing this episode.