How Nervous System Strategies Can Boost Your Income and Resilience with Sheridan Ruth

Welcome to today’s episode, where I delve into the cutting-edge science of the nervous system and how it can unlock unparalleled success for SME owners and procurement professionals. 

I'm joined by the renowned Sheridan, an expert in somatic strategies that transform stress into resilience and boost cognitive performance. We'll explore how practical, body-based techniques can enhance decision-making, increase productivity, and ultimately drive business growth. 

Get ready for a fascinating conversation that will reveal how to optimise your mind and body to achieve your highest potential in both your professional and personal life.

ABOUT THE GUEST

I have a special guest for you today joining me all the way from Australia. 

Sheridan Ruth is no stranger to trauma. She has faced down a number of life changing events and combined those experiences with developing her knowledge and expertise to become a personal coach, to assist people achieve their goals. 

Her “Body Based Business Way” offers an alternative path to those well-trodden and shared guru-based self-improvement practices we regularly see in our social media feeds.

Today I want to learn more about what Sheridan does and how she may help us achieve our aspirations, other systems and methods may have failed to achieve.

Where to discover more about Sheridan and her work:-

Website:        https://sheridanruth.com/ 
LinkedIn:       https://www.linkedin.com/in/sheridanruthbibo/
Facebook:     https://www.facebook.com/sheridanyoga/
Instagram:    https://www.instagram.com/_sheridanruth_/?hl=en-gb
YouTube:       https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCAnF2uEklkvT44h2vkvv1qw
Podcast:       www.sheridanruth.com/the-podcast

ABOUT THE HOST

My name is Dave Barr and I am the Founder and Owner of RLB Purchasing Consultancy Limited.

I have been working in Procurement for over 25 years and have had the joy of working in a number of global manufacturing and service industries throughout this time.

I am passionate about self development, business improvement, saving money, buying quality goods and services, developing positive and effective working relationships with suppliers and colleagues, and driving improvement through out the supply chain.

Now I wish to share this knowledge and that of highly skilled and competent people with you, the listener, in order that you may hopefully benefit from this information.

CONTACT DETAILS

@The Real Life Buyer
Email: david@thereallifebuyer.co.uk
Website: https://linktr.ee/thereallifebuyer

For Purchasing Consultancy services:
https://rlbpurchasingconsultancy.co.uk/
Email: contact@rlbpurchasingconsultancy.co.uk

Find and Follow me @reallifebuyer on Facebook, Instagram, X, Threads and TikTok.

Click here for some Guest Courses - https://www.thereallifebuyer.co.uk/guest-courses/

Click here for some Guest Publications - https://www.thereallifebuyer.co.uk/guest-publications

Transcript

Intro  00:00

Dave, welcome to The Real Life Buyer podcast. In this podcast, you will hear interviews with business owners, entrepreneurs, thought leaders, authors and technical specialists in their field. These professionals will hasten your development, accelerate your career, and broaden your business know how. Now introducing your host, Dave Barr, interviewing with a purchasing twist.

Dave Barr  00:21

Hello and welcome to The Real Life Buyer. How can a nervous system specialist, somatic trauma therapist and business coach help business leaders and career professionals increase their success and wealth? I have a special guest for you today joining me all the way from Australia. Sheridan Ruth is no stranger to trauma. She has faced down a number of life changing events and combined those experiences with developing her knowledge and expertise to become a personal coach to assist people achieve their goals. Her body based business way offers an alternative path to those well trodden and shared guru based self improvement practices we regularly see in social media feeds. Today, I want to learn more about what Sheridan does and how she may help us achieve our aspirations, other systems and methods may have failed to achieve. So without further ado, I welcome Sheridan onto the podcast. Hi Sheridan.

Sheridan Ruth  01:21

Hi Dave. Thank you so much for having me and hi everyone who's listening. Yeah, if you were like, What were those questions? We're going to get all those words we're going to get into that, I promise, if you're familiar with it, also excited to have you here. Yeah,

Dave Barr  01:35

Brilliant. Obviously, there's a lot of technical terminology in the in your titles, if nothing else. So I've shared a few highlights of your professional expertise, but you have a powerful story. Love to hear more about that, and if you could give a little bit of context and background of how you came to be, who and where you are today, and explain a little more about what these technical terms are and how you kind of do your thing.

Sheridan Ruth  02:02

Yeah, thank you. I think, you know, if I'm really explaining it properly, it all goes back to, I was a child, and I was probably about seven years old, and it was a rainy day, and I went, just like so many of us, to go and get my hair cut, and I'm sitting in the chair, the hairdresser is kind of cutting things around, and I had this big, beautiful, beautiful, long hair everyone was so obsessed with, so thick and all this really beautiful and I feel these cold fingers on my scalp, and it felt weird, and it felt different. I was like, I hadn't thought that before. And the hairdresser kind of scurries and gets people around, and they're all looking at my head, and it turns out, I have alopecia areata, which is an autoimmune hair loss that is incurable. There's no cure, and that, I think it did two things for me. Number one, it instilled inside of me a lot of self doubt and a pretty low self esteem. But it also opened me up at a really long a young age, understanding how how difficult life can be. And so I developed this really big kind of care for other people and desire to support other people. And then I, you know, I grew up in Australia, and my family always really valued, like volunteering and all that stuff. And so I entered into the nonprofit sector. I studied community development. I did a lot of grassroots I founded a foundation that continues in operation, that empowers women. Figured out a lot of work in that, but not a lot of money. And I ended up working in finance, in commercial mortgage brokering. And because of certain decisions that I had made, due to having such a low self esteem, I ended up in a really difficult place. I was in an abusive relationship. I left it, he committed suicide, and it was like a telenovela. It was insane. So there's all this tragedy that kind of came, and I was in this place where I was seeing many different things. Number one, how I was in this workplace, very typical finance mortgage brokers, and a lot of yelling in the office, okay? Lot of yelling in the office, and it was pretty disempowering. It's a very toxic work environment. And number two, I'm working in grassroots still, the foundation is continuing, and I'm seeing all of this inequality and just difficult lives. You know, number three, I'm seeing how I'm in pain, and I'm just seeing Okay, so when we have all of this pain inside, we do shitty things to other people. And it was kind of fueled by this that I ended one, I ended up in, you know, I was doing, like, all of the mental health stuff and the therapy and all of the things that you're supposed to do and talking about it, and I was struggling with my anxiety, but I was really trying my best, and nothing was working. And so I remember, there was one night I was doing yoga, and I was kind of like working through and I. I realized that the only thing that had kind of helped me feel better was when I was moving my body, and I would feel kind of emotion come up, or I would, you know, when you're like, out going for a walk, you kind of get this insight. You just feel better. And I was like, there has to be something about this, because talking about this stuff or thinking about it isn't helping me. But there's something in my body that I thought there's something working, and honestly, it was like divine inspiration. And a very good Google search, and I found somatic trauma therapy, which is just essentially how we cultivate a sense of wellness by understanding how our body always is trying to protect us based on the way that it perceives the world, when we can help the body feel safe. And it can be more creative. It can solve better, more important problems, such as, how do I stop yelling at everybody in my work? And how do I also write a better deal? Or, how do I make a better acquisition? But also, how do I contribute to my community in ways that are valuable, so that we can have bigger things? And I just really became to see this, and I think it kind of fell into place. I was doing yoga therapy, I was asked to do culture coaching, I was asked to do consulting, and it was very much a situation where other people saw in me skills that I was struggling to see. And then at one point, I convinced myself, Oh yeah, I am actually quite good at this whole coaching thing. I took it online, and that's how the body based business methodology was born.

Dave Barr  06:32

Wow, certainly at a young age to have that kind of difficult situation, particularly perhaps for a girl who takes a lot of pride in her appearance, and, you know, trying to emulate perhaps other ladies and mum and so forth. That must have been very challenging. I certainly can relate to the trauma side of that. The first 17 years of my life, I suffered a very extensive stammer. I couldn't say a sentence without stuttering over my words. So you can imagine the I suspect you had a similar thing, the challenges when you're at school, when other children just latch on to that kind of problem. And of course, you just face it day in and day out. So I get where you come from, and I know how difficult that must have been, but you clearly overcome those things, and that's wonderful to hear. And now you're helping everybody else, and that is such an important thing in the world, I think it makes you feel really good when you're helping others. I get a kick out of myself as well. So thank you for sharing. That must have been a tough journey. So well done. Now, how can you help our audience? So we've got a pretty fast paced business world at the moment, lots of stuff going on around the world, quite a bit of stress. Certainly, there's a challenges financially for many families in the UK. At the moment, I'd love to understand a little bit more about understanding and regulating the nervous system can enhance something like cognitive function. You know, the brain works, those kind of decision making abilities that we all faced with every single day, and how you and what you do can sort of translate this into tangible business outcomes. So how on earth do you do that kind of thing? What's, what's the tips and expertise that you can share today on that.

Sheridan Ruth  08:23

Yeah, that's a good question. Okay, so I think the first thing that we have to do is we have to acknowledge that there are a lot of, yeah, like you said, everything is fast moving, but I would like to kind of say there's a lot of constraints, right? The economy over the past couple of honestly, just like decade, I think that we're at a place where it's not behaving in the way that it has historically. And so everybody has all of these different opinions about what to expect over the coming years, or what we should be doing with interest, like rates and what's happening with inflation. And then we have all of these discussions around unemployment and like, you know what's what's happening in the market, and we also have access to social media and AI, which is completely changed the the economy. So we have these constraints. I like to think of them as their constraints. And they're different, they're uncertain, and they can feel very tense, like, okay, my budget is x, y, z, but I have to achieve this specific result, and I haven't done that before. The body perceives that, particularly as stress. It can put the body into a feeling of, I'm not safe, no matter how much you you've got your plan in your head, and you're smart and you know what's going on, your body can perceive that as something that threatens your resources, your identity and your sense of belonging. So resources is like, I might lose money, might lose my house, my identity is I probably identify with. You know, we all identify with our success in a certain way, or of being renowned. For a certain thing, and if all of a sudden we can't provide that or perform in that way, then that's really threatening to who we are, which is very scary for our psyche and our nervous system, or your sense of belonging. There is inside of all of us that that, that younger part of us that's like, well, if I don't speak a certain way, or if I don't look a certain way, or if I don't make a certain amount of money, or if I don't do the certain thing, then then people won't love me, and if I'm not, and the nervous system thinks, well, if I'm not loved, then I'll kick me out of the tribe, and then I'll die. So that's happening right now, and everyone's nervous systems, every time we go to work, every time we open our email, every time we look at the news, your nervous system is trying to answer that question, am I loved and am I safe? Are my resources protected? So we can understand that, and what's happening inside of your body when it perceives that stress, which we are having more of now, especially as we're always connected, is it puts the energy in the body into a stress response, and that might be a sympathetic response. So it's activating, which means that it makes your heart beat faster. It makes your mind, like, move quicker. It makes you want to get up and down. It makes you like, you have all of this kind of buzzing energy. You want to get stuff done, you want to send an email. You're going to call this person. You got to go for a walk. You're going to do this thing, or you're going to completely avoid all of that and put all that energy into cleaning the garage. But we have energy, or it, the body will say, the threat is too big. I'm not capable enough. My best bet for survival is playing dead and doing nothing, so I'm just gonna watch TV. I'm not gonna do anything. I'm not gonna send those emails. I'm gonna hide over here when no one can see me, and I'm gonna watch TV, and I'm gonna do like, all of those random little tools on my to do list that that I don't actually, that don't actually have any result. I'm just gonna do all of those because I feel good about myself, but I'm hiding from the threat and putting energy into doing these things, which means it's not putting energy into being creative, it's not putting energy into connecting with other people, because it feels threatened by others. It's like I have to protect myself, which means I can't let people in. It's not putting energy into relationships. It's not putting energy into being creative, it's not putting energy into getting out there. It's not putting energy into nothing. I think about I have a client. His name is David, and he he was at that he worked in a startup, and he was at that point where the investors were like, Okay, if you don't reach profitability in the next six months, we're not investing in another round. Like, this is this is kind of it. And he had put so much into his so much of himself into it. And it came to me because he was noticing that, like that tense energy was stopping him from actually connecting with his team and motivating them, because they're very connection based when we were able to focus on regulating what happened was that now he showed up to the calls he connects with his his teams, okay, like, how, actually, how are you actually? And that helps them feel safe. So now, when they're looking at how to get to those goals, whether it's just keeping people on the app, or knowing what to purchase or what not to they're creative because their bodies don't have to protect each other from each other. They get to be creative. They get to be innovative. And the budget hasn't changed. The company has the same amount of resources, so there's actually the same amount of stress. But because they can say, Okay, I'm safe enough now, we get to be in that that, you know that fun problem solving place, and he gets to speak to his investors, and he's like, he's like, Okay, I had the courage to just call my investors and just say hello. And they were like, Why are you calling me? You normally just call me where you want something just, I generally just thought, like, we could have a chat. Like, how are you and and that's like, I think long term, we're not we're not there yet, but I think, long term, that's going to help in the next fundraising of like that actual, that connection and the creativity, and now we're providing results. We're not just protecting ourselves from a perceived threat that may not even be real.

Dave Barr  14:12

That's quite, quite interesting. I certainly relate to a number of things you mentioned there, certainly the increased heart rate. Certainly for me, when I feel quite stressed, it more occurs in the in the night time when all your body is calm, and you wake up in middle of night, at two o'clock in the morning, and you feel your heart racing. And then you start thinking about the challenges, the issues, you perhaps overthink about many things, and you mentioned about people going into the garage. For me, that is great therapy going clean my car or clean my motorbikes. It sort of grounds me a bit. So it's quite interesting some of the things you're mentioning there, how to cope with things and the mechanisms to cope. And there's my next question. Is about chronic stress, because certainly I'm seeing more business owners, people who are doing startups, who are trying to make the new way in the world, but they've been perhaps made redundant. They're not happy with their lives. They're starting a new business venture, talking about funding. They need support. They need orders in an intense period of time, and they're trying to battle the way through the myriad of networking meetings that you attend everything else, and then do these lovely 30 to 60nd pitches, and they're pretty stressed out about all these things, and that kind of hinders both their productivity and their growth, because they're just in this whirlpool of of stress and trying to get things done, but not particularly well, etc. Now, something I'm quite interested in that you refer to as somatic strategies. I'm not quite sure what that means. I'd like to know more. And I certainly like to know not just what they are, but how can these strategies help in mitigating the effects of this chronic stress. The things we just mentioned and talked about, are there kind of practical steps that certainly new business owners, particularly, but even those that have been in the game for quite a while, how can they integrate those into their daily routines? I think it's important a daily routine, if you just do it once in a while. I don't think it has a lasting impact, and you're just back to where you were a week or two later, and you think, Oh, I have a go at doing this. But like, exercise, you don't do it every day. You're never going to get fit. So,

Sheridan Ruth  16:32

Yeah

Dave Barr  16:32

you do that? What are somatic strategies and how they can help us? That'd be great to hear. Let's

Sheridan Ruth  16:37

Let's continue with your metaphor or analogy, not the right word with exercise. So first of all, somatic essentially means using the intelligence of the body. So Soma is kind of different definitions in different places, but it means the body. And when we refer to somatic strategies, what we're talking about is accessing the innate intelligence inside of your body that is kind of self healing. It's that same intelligence you have where, if you were to graze your arm, if you were to keep it in a nice environment, and you don't pick it, and you don't, you don't like put something disgusting on it, you clean it, you just leave it, it will heal, right, right? Your nervous system has that capacity, and in we can liken it to an exercise the way that we do fulfilling work, or anything that provokes any type of well being or like pleasure in the body. You feel endorfins when you go exercise, you go into a slightly dysregulated state. And we feel fulfilled in our work when we push ourselves and we exert ourselves, and we go into a slightly stressful experience, and then we get to the other side, be like, Oh, that was really satisfying. What's important is that we're getting to we're exerting, we're stressing, and then we're relaxing, just like we can't always go to the gym and work out really hard every day. So our nervous system needs the same we need those levels of like, deep, deep, deep rest, I think. And this is something that you can take away, Dave, is that if you're waking up in the middle of the night, you're neglecting that state of ease during the day. And so your body is waiting until you're very restful, probably around like a sleep cycle, and then it's saying, okay, great. So now that you ignored me all day. Here's all the emotions and the thoughts that I wanted you to feel because they're important. Oh, wow. Now that you've relaxed a little, here's all that stuff, right?

Dave Barr  18:31

It's almost like a it opens the flood gates when you get to a certain point in your sleep cycle then? Okay.

Sheridan Ruth  18:37

Well, ideally, it doesn't have to when we're when we're working from regulation, which is what I would encourage everyone to going forward to do this is it's like, if you ignore your body all day, it will speak to you when your barriers go down, right? Okay? That makes you have to come back and stop ignoring it.

Dave Barr  18:43

Because you battle on, don't you? No matter what's going on the day, you just carry on and carry on. You know, you keep working for longer and longer hours quite often. So, yeah, that makes sense. You suddenly relax and yeah, then it hits you, I guess,

Sheridan Ruth  19:11

Yeah. And I haven't, I have a PDF that I'll provide that will be helpful, and it will go into detail around the nervous system and really tangible ways to regulate that are going to be different. Based on, like, you experience more of a sympathetic heart rate up there are going to be other people who tend towards more of that. Like, I can't do it. It's hopeless. I can't I think in this space, the people who experience that more don't get as far. So statistically, we're more of the we get anxious and we get activated just because, in some level that has helped create success. So there's, like, a couple of things where we need to be aware that and look for ways that we can continue to have the same kind of output that is creating our success, but we're doing it from a soft place, and we're like, okay, checking in after that meeting. Should I. Just go for a quick walk, just to just to feel the feelings, think, the things you know, go and clean one part of the garage, just to, pro allow the body to process that meeting. Okay, cool. Now I'm ready for the next meeting. And it's also other things, like listening to the body, which means, and it's so basic, eat three meals a day, try not to have too much coffee when you're tired, rest.

Dave Barr  20:23

You're crazy. People like coffee, really?

Sheridan Ruth  20:31

I know, but it's that. It actually, you know, that's part of regulation. Are you drinking enough electrolytes? Are you eating well? Are if, if being in a car for too long makes you feel unsettled, go for a walk after or take a few deep breaths, or just kind of like, shake it out. Or if looking at your phone makes you feel tense, do less video calls and more just audio. Feel into these and then there's fancy ways to do it. You know, we can do special breath work and and all that stuff, and there's that fancy stuff. And I could speak about this a little bit more, and there actually is probably one thing that I will say that I think is differentiating between what I encourage and provide and teach versus other people who just focus on the tech, like the the superficial. So I'll leave it there. And when you're ready for that next part, you can tell me.

Dave Barr  21:20

Okay, so I'm trying to process this myself now. So let's say you've had a pretty intense meeting. The important thing is to not just go to the next meeting and the next meeting. Take a bit of time out, as you say, to process what's happened. Get your head straight, perhaps take a quick five minute walk around the block. You know, I quite like the idea of, you know, taking your shoes and socks off and and earthing yourself in a little garden area for five minutes. Just give yourself a bit for a break. Allow yourself to calm down. And by doing that on a regular basis throughout the day, you say eating well and regularly. Should we say as well? Those things can help to de stress you during the day, so at night time, when you wake up in the middle of night, certainly at my age, sort of thing guys do, should you say, you don't automatically go into start processing what has happened? Did I do this? Right? Did I say that? Right? Have I done this activity or what have I forgotten to write down? Those things diminish because you've been dealing with it throughout the day. Would I be kind of right in saying those things 100%

Sheridan Ruth  22:25

Yes. Get it. I get it. Your body will trust you to. And if those are the questions that you ask, I would encourage you to, you know, take away from the computer, go for a walk. And did I What? What did I love about that? I love this. What would I do differently? I would do that differently. Okay, write down all my action items and move forward and like actually creating a little bit of a ritual, a transition ritual, yeah, that becomes automatic.

Dave Barr  22:52

Yeah, that's great, because we have a tendency, certainly with our calendars, to fill them completely, don't we? We don't take or actively put in a 15 minute break between meetings. It's bang, bang, bang, bang. Meeting after meeting. You know, you've got to do this. You've got to do that. You never take the time out. And people see a gap in your diary, oh do they love to fill it as well. So you've got to almost block out very small periods of time to recharge, reset, and then, then you can go back into things. Yeah, that's really good. Some great advice there. Now, we all love to hear about stories. I certainly do, and I can relate more to stories you've obviously worked extensively with many individuals. Love to hear some examples, one or two, if you could, real world examples where your nervous system focused intervention, should we say, and that's led to a significant increase in your clients, business success and income. Aren't we all striving for that? So what lessons can you share today on your experience? Have you got some real examples you can share?

Sheridan Ruth  23:54

I think it would be helpful. I feel like we've addressed more of that activating, and like I feel activated. I think maybe, or we're feeling like high stress, and it's making us anxious, maybe we would speak about, I had a client who came in, and if, if we were to describe how she was feeling, she was a co founder, and she had a lot of experience in sales, and that was kind of her position, was, you know, to do the pitch decks and to bring on the, I would say, kind of like, like sales to individuals who needed the service, as well as, like, larger corporations, they kind of had both funnels and, you know, that's a big job. And also in a startup, place space. And I think heavy was the energy that her entire company was feeling and she was feeling she This was the third startup that she had founded. The past two had failed, statistically, that is what happens. Yeah, but she'd noticed that sales had kind of reached this plateau, and they were trying to expand into the New Zealand market, actually. And they had reached this plateau, and they were trying to, like, we don't know how to, how to move forward. And she was feeling that same stuckness inside. And on one hand, it was hard for her, because she had this kind of advice of, like, Yeah, that's fine. Like, you, you're profitable. Like, it's fine. Just stick with it. But there was that drive inside of I was like, Yeah, but we can do better, okay? And we want to do better when we've, we've we've been, we've said that we would, what we found we went in, and we actually that, that feeling of stuck energy. So we use, kind of like a somatic therapy on her, and we kind of like, okay, how is it feeling your body and what is it trying to say to you? And real interesting, because in order to expand into the New Zealand market, she needed to be really, really creative. They needed to do something different. They had another competitor there, so they had to stand out. And they were feeling stuck because she wasn't in touch with like, her instinct and her creativity. And you know that, like that fire you feel inside you, where you're like, this is the right decision. It doesn't make any sense, but I know that it's right. Yep, she'd been playing by the book so far. And so the business had been playing by the book so far. They need creativity. And so we kind of get in touch with this thing inside of her body, and we kind of ask some questions around it, and what we learn is that there is this part of her that had this really good idea about how they would do this specific marketing campaign, but it was, it was like this little whisper, and it was actually afraid to kind of speak up. And it was just like instinct inside of her, but it was afraid to speak up because this other heavier energy was essentially just every single time that she had tried to be creative and somebody said, No, that's a bad idea. That doesn't make sense. It was her first boss. She began as a journalist, and was like, Oh no, that doesn't mean that's not a good story. We can't run it. And then it was actually her partner who was like, Oh, don't be silly. That's a silly idea, right? And she had just kind of begun to doubt that little instinct inside of her. Thankfully, she had the courage inside to say, okay, you know what? Nothing else worked. I'm gonna present this idea to the team, and we're gonna see where we go. And it did two things. They actually they they trial it out here in Australia, and they trialed it out in New Zealand. And New Zealand is still hasn't fully gotten to the numbers that they want. It's been about eight months since they launched, but they've launched in the country. And I think here in Australia, it was maybe like 150% increase in profit. Wow. You know, it's, it's not like something that they're expecting, that they were happy. I think that most importantly, they, they, they, they got past that plateau,

Dave Barr  27:42

Right. Cool 150% that sounds good around that.

Sheridan Ruth  27:44

I would have to ask. But, yeah.

Dave Barr  27:47

Yeah, great. Now that's interesting, because that seems to me that people apply logic to a number of decisions. You know, entrepreneurs are more gut driven. I feel, you know, they believe in something. And quite often when you apply logic. And certainly other people it sounds were applying logic to her saying, No, that doesn't make sense to me, because they're applying their logical brain, but it was the emotional intelligence we say. So it leads really nicely onto my next question that said, Hold on a minute. Now I feel deep down, this is the right thing to do. And so she kind of went down that route and pushed that route a little bit more and almost forgot the logic, and said, No, I feel this is the right thing to do. And so let's try it. Would that be a fair summary?

Sheridan Ruth  28:31

Yeah, I think so. And I think most importantly is that when she was able to disentangle herself from that heavy feeling, which is what we can do through these somatic therapies. She found the confidence to stand up against therapeutics.

Dave Barr  28:47

Yeah, that's really good, because we do get very influenced by other people we respect. And if somebody that you respect says, I don't think that's right, quite often, you'll dismiss that idea and move forward, rather than stick with your gut and say, I hear what you say, but I'm going to try this, if nothing else,

Sheridan Ruth  29:05

Which is also what I feel most founders and entrepreneurs, we get to the in the beginning, we get to the success that we have because we follow that gut, and then it's almost like a little bit later on, with other people's opinions around us, sometimes we can lose track of that instinct.

Dave Barr  29:24

Yeah, absolutely. That leads brilliantly onto emotional intelligence, and certainly in the context of leadership, where I'm thinking about this is emotional intelligence is becoming, I find more cited as a key factor for success. It's not necessarily, you know, the the statistical way that your intelligence works. Emotional Intelligence is quite a different element. So in the things that you do, how can that influence and boost your emotional intelligence? You know, what sort of practices do you suggest people can do to boost that skill, boost that competence? Because I understand emotional intelligence can be learned and developed. So what kind of things can you do to really help us get in contact with that area and boost its ability for us?

Sheridan Ruth  30:11

I'm really happy that we ended up rescheduling this because if you would ask me this question last week, I wouldn't have had I would have had it for any generic answer on Monday, I did a, kind of like a workshop, and we did it. It's the basic workshop that I have, of like, understanding how your nervous system impacts the decisions that you make in business settings, particularly relating to money. And I was like, you know, we've got this thing called somatic intelligence inside of us, and it's like, you know, it kind of like gives us the impact that in that instinct, and we can, we can access it in this way. Guys were like, Oh, so it's like the new emotional intelligence. I was like, it is, it's like, it's, it's the new emotional intelligence. Because emotional intelligence, when our nervous system is regulated, it's very innate. We we can understand other people where because we connect with them, and I feel like I can, I can. I don't have to pretend to be someone I'm not. I don't have to think about what I'm going to say when I respond to you. I'm actually, like, really, truly connecting with you. I can. I can be curious about your experience. Okay, you so you see it like that. Oh, I didn't realize that I can. We can be slow when I interact. I can look at that person in the eye. Can really learn from them, and they can learn from me, and we share. And on a nervous system perspective, there's a there's a communication happening that's automatic. Oh, you're a safe person. I'm a safe person. I can open up. We can learn. When we're regulated that emotional intelligence, it's not even a conversation, it's just natural. But I think that the way that we the way that I would encourage, the number one way that I would encourage people to get in contact with somatic intelligence, which is body based intelligence, which gives you access to emotional intelligence, but it also gives you access to your instinct, is through something that we call introspection. So it's the ability to read what is happening on the inside of your body. 

Dave Barr  32:11

Right, okay

Sheridan Ruth  32:12

and we can cultivate this skill by finding what's happening on the inside of our body. And so the practice then becomes, if we we would have wrap this all up in a nice little bow for the listeners based on the conversations we had. The practice then becomes, okay, I finished the call. What are three things I'm feeling on the inside of my body? Huh? I'm I'm going to do mine right now. I'm actually a little bit hungry. I feel the breath in the back of my lungs, which tells me that I'm feeling grounded, and I feel like maybe buzzing sensation in my head, which tells me that this conversation is interesting to me and that, and if we do that consistently, we will our the voice inside, the instinct inside, will speak to us more. We'll be more regulated, we'll connect more with others, and we'll be more creative, more innovative, and do some things, right?

Dave Barr  33:01

That's fascinating. How you how you looked in yourself, but you translated a feeling into something that you could share verbally. Now that's I'm trying to think, you know, would I associate the buzzing in my head with something that says that I'm enjoying the conversation? That's something I would never have considered. That's quite an interesting point. You may it's you made this.

Sheridan Ruth  33:22

I mean, I've been practicing. This for over a decade. Yes,

Dave Barr  33:25

I've never thought that you have to translate your feelings as well. I've never tried even considered that. I never reflected inwardly to say, Okay, what does this feeling mean to me? How do I interpret that? So that's, yeah, that's really maybe kind of question, how on earth it's like a different language? How on earth do you get that?

Sheridan Ruth  33:47

It is a different language, and it's just what you said. It's two questions, what am I feeling? What does that mean to me? And it's a language that you will learn in your body, and it will be totally different to mine. Your buzzing in your head might mean something totally different. It's a language.

Dave Barr  34:05

Yeah, wow, yes, that's something I've never considered. So thanks for that. I'm going to have to reflect on that after this podcast now and try and figure my what's going on in me. So that's really good. Great. Now, conscious of the time I want you to share where the audience can find more about you and your teachings. I think it's important they can study this a little bit more in depth. So where would they go? What social channels are there? For example?

Sheridan Ruth  34:32

Yeah, thank you. So I think the simplest place to go is www.sheridanruth.com, if you're interested in the nervous system PDF, so that you can understand the nervous system more and gain access to really simple practices that you can use without much privacy, without much time, without much space to regulate. Definitely go to www.sheridanruth.com/regulate. Essentially. If you put Sheridan Ruth into Google, there is one of me, you will find me.

Dave Barr  35:05

Brilliant. I understand. You've got other channels, like Facebook and Instagram, and you've also got, should we say, fantastically, your own podcast, which certainly you've had in the past.

Sheridan Ruth  35:14

I do have my own podcast, and you are about to be the first person I tell about the new brand. We I'm, I'm launching a book. Should be out in March. And so the podcast has gone through a rebrand to kind of match up a little bit more with the book's intention. And the podcast is called "Sustainable success". So you can Google that, and you will find "Sustainable success".

Dave Barr  35:36

Brilliant.. Well, congratulations on on the book. I admire people who have the tenacity and ability to write a book. Please, when you do publish that, share the imagery of the book with me, and I'm going to make sure everybody can get to see that. I'll pull it on my social media, and hopefully that will encourage people to obviously buy a copy, download a copy, or whatever. It's going to be so brilliant. Congratulations. One final question. I did some research, obviously trying to get my head around what you do. And I stumbled across a couple of names, couple of doctors that are kind of neuroscientists and such. One was Dr Andrew Huberman, and another guy that jumped out was a guy called David, Dr David Perlmutter, kind of neuro, neurologists, that kind of stuff. I was intrigued to know what experts, which experts, have influenced you the most, and what would you say sets you apart from the other experts in your field?

Sheridan Ruth  36:32

Okay, Two good questions. Dr Huberman is wonderful, but his podcasts are a little bit long for me and but really great if you want to get into the scientist. If you're curious about it, you absolutely need to Google Dr Stephen Hodges, who is really the founder of the theory of nervous system regulation that we're operating from. It's polyvagal theory. It's blown up, and that's probably the best place I would recommend. The other is Dr Bessel van der Kolk, and he wrote the book "The body keeps score", which is a really wonderful book that tells in very scientific yet easy to understand way, how is it that the body holds and processes everything that's happened in our life and everything that happened to our ancestors, and what does that mean for our life today? I think that if you're if anyone is curious, in the fundamentals of this work, "The Body Keeps the Score" is the best book to practice, to work with. And what makes me different? What makes me different is that we're bringing it together with business there, in my awareness, there's absolutely nobody out there who is saying, Okay, here's what the nervous system is doing in your personal life, and here is how it applies to the decisions that you're making. Here how applies to how you lead your team. Here's how you how it applies to how you relate to your money, how you how you feel when you're in between the meetings. It's like we have people who are doing business work. We have people who are doing therapeutic or holistic or wellness or health work. But there's nobody I get to bring both of the world together, right? So I help you bridge it.

Dave Barr  38:17

Yeah, you've got an Only statement. There something that I've I've spoken to another guest, a chap called Roy Osing, and he advocates the only statement, so you are the only person who and I think there's brilliant that helps to set you apart from everybody else. And I think that's an important one for yourself. I am the only blah blah blah. That's a really interesting point, and combining it with business as well. What you do with business, obviously, is, is your expertise, and you need to express that every needs to know you are the only one that's brilliant.

Sheridan Ruth  38:50

Yeah, I am. Thanks. I almost got a little bit

Dave Barr  38:53

please share that with me. Share me your only statement. I would love to put that out as well.

Sheridan Ruth  38:58

I will. I will, I will. Thank you super well. 

Dave Barr  39:00

Thanks very much for most enjoyable podcast. It's been great talking to you, and I wish you all the success for the future.

Sheridan Ruth  39:09

Thank you so much. I appreciate it. Thanks for listening. Guys. Take care.

Dave Barr  39:13

So there's another Real Life Buyer podcast. I do hope you enjoyed it, and it has given you some ideas and inspiration for greater action and achievement. Don't forget to subscribe so you don't miss out on future episodes, and a five star review would be most appreciated if you would like to discover more about me and what I do. Take a look at www.thereallifebuyer.co.uk. Bye.