Hey, guys, and welcome to Change Wired Podcast, the podcast where we decode the human side of performance, leadership and personal and collective transformation. I'm Angela Sharina, your coach, your guide in all things behavior-first, purpose-fueled and change-ready. Today, guys, today I'm very excited because we are diving into something that fuels everything you do and become your excellence, your mastery, the results you get or don't get in your life, the person you become, who you lead, how you lead, how you impact and influence the world. We are diving into what really drives people, not the usual rewards and punishments, but something deeper, Something longer lasting, what Daniel Pink, an amazing author, researcher, calls the third drive. If you are a leader, a coach, a teacher of some sort, a parent or someone trying to motivate yourself for that next level goal, this episode is for you. It will explain what works the best for a long-term motivation, especially on hard challenging goals, goals that often nobody else cares but you. So what works best for that kind of pursuit and also how to motivate others excellence in others, becoming better selves in others and maintaining results and effort long-term. So we'll explore all of that again, not just theory but also practice. Questions for reflection that you can use for your personal motivation, ignition to motivate and lead people around you and to feel greatness and mastery and excellence in yourself and others. We'll explore why carrots and sticks fall flat, how to light the fire from within, and I'll guide you through those powerful questions to help you or your team find your true inner fuel to stand out, become and stay excellent and create the impact, the future and the world that you're committed to. So let's start pushing, let's start igniting and let's get into it.
Speaker 1Guys, in one of the workshops I did, I got this question. Somebody asked me do punishment motivate people? Like fines, bad grades, demotions, all kinds of negative consequences. Do they really motivate people? Do they make people better right? Do they make my people perform better, excel, is it worth it? Or something else works better? And to which I replied sure, punishments do motivate us, but only to a point.
Speaker 1You'll get compliance, especially if you have what I call leverage, like if a person or a group of people depend on you for their well-being or progression of some sort. Yes, that will motivate them. You'll get compliance, like when you're telling the kid you know, do this, or else You're not going to get something, or you're going to get some punishment. Like you'll get compliance, because people are not stupid, just like animals. You know if you are threatened you're going to do the thing. But you only only will get compliance minimum effort, but never the commitment, never the excellence, never the best in people or yourself. If you want people to give their best, you don't motivate them. You help them to motivate themselves.
You know, guys, I've been in coaching I think close to 20 years now Soon going to be closing on those two decades Long time, but somehow, even early in my career and that's how I believe I succeeded as a coach even earlier, somehow I sensed and now I have more scientific explanation for this, more research backing up this point of view, and that's why I feel confident with that but somehow, early in my career, I sensed this that long-term motivation never comes from carrots, not a raise, not an award, not six-pack abs, and definitely long-term motivation doesn't come from a stick of some sort. If you want a sustainable, lasting, high-performance, mustery, consistency over long-term, the fire has to come from within, from identity, from ownership, from meaning, like, for example, research shows that if you want to motivate your kids to do something, you know what works better Asking them. Do you want to be a good helper to your mom, to your dad? Do you want to be a good son, a good daughter, but do you want to be a good helper? They ask this in research and it outperformed by a lot this question can you clean your room? Because I don't know you have to or you're going to get something With adults. Do you want to be a strong, grounded leader for your family or your team Outperforms? Can you improve your feedback skills? Or will you hit the gym this week? Right? Can you improve your closing or seal skills or whatever that might be? Or else, right Again, punishment and threat works only so far, but it never gets the excellence out of people. And why do questions like do you want to be a good helper outperform questions like can you clean your room? The reason why is because one speaks to identity and purpose, the other speaks to tasks, and that's what at the core of the book that I just finished by Daniel Pink again, amazing researcher and writer. The reason is what Daniel Pink calls the third drive In his book Drive the surprising truth about what motivates us.
Speaker 1What I sensed earlier in my career turned out to be the truth that works in theory and application in all kinds of environment. That's proven by scientific research Biological needs. Drive one like, let's say, your hunger, your thirst, your need for rest and shelter and carrot sticks kind of drives which Daniel Pink calls drive two only get us so far. Again, you get to compliance, you get to doing the bare minimum. But last thing, motivation, doing a lot more than you are expected to do.
Speaker 1This kind of drive that drives excellence, now and over time, comes from autonomy freedom to choose what, how, when and who. Exercising your power of free will, mastery, growth and getting better at something that matters to us. That's the key to us, not to what you think should matter to people, but to us. So that's why you need to elicit or evoke or figure out what matters to people you're trying to motivate. It's not your motivation, it's there, it has to be there. And then purpose. So autonomy, mastery, purpose. This is what comprises the third drive. The first drive your food, your thirst, your shelter. The second drive carrots and sticks, rewards and punishment. And the third drive autonomy, mastery, purpose.
So want to stay motivated long-term, want to lead others to their best performance. Long-term, design better questions, create the right rituals and build environments that spark ownership and growth and meaning and this is how the best leaders in the best companies lead. They don't push, like Google. They don't push, they ignite. Do you want to be your best? Or Tesla, with Elon Musk?
Speaker 1For all the missteps and bad leadership examples he has, he learned how to ignite that third drive. Do you want to work with the best? Steve Jobs, by the way, did the same to enroll, to hire the best people, sometimes stealing them from other companies, from, like Coca-Cola, some executive that he put as a CEO of Apple at some point. He said do you want to sell sugary water till the end of your life or do you want to change the world? He knew these leaders. They know how to speak to the third drive, to your identity, to your sense of autonomy, mastery, purpose, to who you are, and that's how they help people to motivate themselves. And that's how you can motivate your kids doing the best they can over long-term. That's how you motivate yourself to write that book, to build this business, to create this nonprofit that's going to change the world.
Speaker 1Whatever that is, if you are in a company and you want to create impact, you want to see different things happening, you want to make a change. That's how you motivate yourself to do your best. All the leaders, overachievers, you see doing that like overachieving, doing a lot more than they expected to do that drive that comes from their autonomy, mastery, purpose, that they know why this is important to them not to you, but to them Anyhow. So I want to share with you a few questions that will help you to ignite that inner fire, that third drive, in yourself or people around you. But before we do that, before we jump into questions that you can use for self-reflection, to ignite that sense of autonomy, mastery, purpose in yourself or your kids or your spouses or your team doing purpose hackathon, before we jump into practical questions that you can record you can download this audio recording, get the transcript. You can download this audio recording, get the transcript a lot of free services online and then put it into ChatGPT or something else and it will give you all the questions that I'm going to spell out to you right now. But before we do that, don't forget guys, share this podcast episode If you find it useful, if you find something that works for you, if something improves your life, share it If you care for the world to get better, for more people to find the purpose, their meaning, their need for autonomy, mastery and growth.
Speaker 1So together, together, we create a better world. So don't be just a consumer, be a doer as well. Share rate review whatever is the easiest thing for you, the most meaningful thing for you, so do that. And now back to the episode. That's like my self-made intro, because I'm still figuring out how to do the music in my episodes as well, so I'm trying to make my voice musical. But now back to the questions, back to the promise practice that you can use for your own self-reflection, doing with your team, with your family, to ignite that third drive, that fire that from within will inspire excellence that lasts. Before we jump in, let me drink some water. I'm maintaining my physical work as well as my internal fire.
Speaker 1So, set of questions five questions to ignite autonomy, mastery and purpose. Question number one autonomy. Five questions to speak to people's autonomy to choose, to become who they want to become, their identity, autonomy. I choose to Question one where in your life do you feel most free to choose how you work, live and create? So question one where in your life do you feel most free to choose how you work, to choose how you work, live, create? Question number two what part of your day feels most yours, designed by you for you? Question number three If no one was watching you and you didn't need to explain yourself, what would you do more of? Question number four what do you feel most in control? When do you feel most in control of your time, of your energy, of your choices, like when? When are those situations? When are those times when you feel the most in control? Number five what rules or expectations are you secretly tired of obeying? What rules or expectations are you secretly tired of obeying? What would you change if you could? Autonomy isn't about rebellion, guys, it's about ownership. And they say that the best leaders own, choose to own more stuff in their life. So autonomy isn't about rebellion, it's about ownership. What part of your life do you want to reclaim as yours? That's what leaders do. They reclaim more parts as theirs. So five questions to ignite autonomy. If you need to rewind, just do that on your device.
Number two mastery. I want to get better at igniting excellence, growth, the need, the fire for getting better. Question number one what's something that challenges you but also deeply excites you to improve at right? So what's you but also deeply excites you to improve at right. So what's challenging but also exciting to improve at? For me, it's my speaking, it's my communication, it's understanding systems for human thriving better and building those systems right. So what's something that challenges you but also excites you that you want to get better at? Number two where in your life do you feel the thrill of getting better, even if no one else notices Like for me, my workouts. It's not like I'm competing somewhere, but I'm always improving something there, even if nobody else notices. But it's just an internal feeling.
Speaker 1Question number three what's a skill you'd keep working on, even if you never got paid for it? For me, figuring out what makes people thrive and how to set up for that, how to ignite that. So we do it on autopilot, right. So what skill you'd keep working on, even if you never got paid for it? Coaching, transformation. Another one for me. Number four what frustrates you right now? Not because it's bad, but because you know you could do it better. What frustrates you right now? Not because, again, it's bad, but because you know you could do it better. Number five what have you outgrown, skill-wise, mindset-wise, what's your next level? Level Mastery is about meaningful progress and the underscore or the stress is on meaningful guys. Mastery is about meaningful progress. Where do you want to level up? Not to impress, but to express your potential. And now to five questions to ignite purpose, that this matters, because this matters, because?
Speaker 1Number one, what problem do you care about solving, even when it's hard? For me, it's creating systems for human thriving. I believe we can build a better world, a world where becoming your best is something everyone does on autopilot, right? So what problem do you care about solving, even when it's hard? And also, for me, what's important is providing those opportunities, the education, the connections, the projects. Number two what do you want to help or lead by example? Who do you want to help or lead by example? For why them? Who do you want to help or lead by example? Who do you want to help or lead by example for why them Like? Who do you want to lead? Who do you want to matter to your family, your team, who else? What kind of people? Who do you want to lead and create a better world? For?
Speaker 1Number three, what have you felt proud? Not just of what you did. When have you felt proud? Not just of what you did, but why you did it? I blogged about it. I exercise every day and I'm proud of that, not because of exercise, but because very often I don't want to and I choose to because I know it's good for me. That choice, that reason, that's what I'm proud of.
Number four what makes you feel like your efforts are contributing to something larger than yourself? What makes you feel like your efforts are contributing to something larger than yourself? And number five what legacy do you want to leave behind, not on LinkedIn, but in the hearts of those you influence? A very powerful question, guys what legacy do you want to leave behind, not on LinkedIn, not on paper, not on your resume, but in the hearts of those you influence? Purpose doesn't have to be lofty, guys. It just has to be real for you. What gives you, what gives your effort meaning? And closing reflection if you were to build your next chapter around these three freedom to choose, a craft to master and a reason that matters what would change in your life today? And what's one thing you can do this week to move closer to that version of you? And that's it for today, guys.
Speaker 1Again, if you need these questions to remember them, to repeat them, just rewind. Technology allows us to do that. Please do share review rate to spread this to more ears. Maybe share with your coworkers, with your team, with your family, so they are motivated to reflect on this. This would mean the world to me. If you maybe tag me, contact me, like we did this, angela will listen to your podcast and because of that, we reflected on our purpose, on our autonomy, on our mastery. So that would be super, super awesome. But besides that, thank you for your attention, thank you for listening and till next time, keep growing.