Hello and welcome back to another episode of Change Wired Podcast. My name is Angela Sharina. I'm executive leadership coach 360. I'm also your partner in change and personal and collective transformation on a journey to grow personally and help you grow and help the world to grow and unlock more of our potential on all levels with everyone. I fundamentally believe, guys, that each of us has a seed of greatness. And if we take enough energy and effort and intention to create the kind of soil, the kind of environment that nourishes that seed of potential and potential of greatness, we can do anything and we can amaze ourselves and the world and make some things happen. Today, guys, we're doing a couple of interesting things. By the end of this podcast, you're gonna practice with me one of the most effective tools in cognitive behavioral therapy. I would say a fundamental tool to rewire your negative self-talk. Specifically, I'm talking about the kind of self-talk that usually happens to all of us. Like something happens in our life that can be interpreted negatively, and our mind our mind tends to interpret it negatively, and then because of that, our emotional state, our mood, and most importantly, the actions, the behaviors that we take become aren't the best to move us through this maybe challenging moment into a better future. And that's the most hurtful and toxic effect of negative thinking. And it happens to everyone, and the high performance performers, uh, people who achieve a lot, learn how to work with this negative self-talk, transforming it into a more effective way to talk to ourselves. So we move through these challenging moments in our lives to a more positive uh state, learning, growing, uh improving, creating more positive impact in our lives and in the world faster instead of looping through these patterns that just stand in our way and don't allow our seed of greatness, our potential to thrive and grow. So today you're gonna learn this four-step process. If you haven't learned it yet, because we brought it up a couple of times on this podcast already. But more than that, we're gonna learn it together with a custom chat GPT, well, custom GPT that I made yesterday, which actually walks you through this sequence. And this custom Chat GPT, I called it self-talk trainer. So it is available online, and the link is also in the show notes. So try it out. It's very fast, it can take about a minute, sometimes longer, if you have negative self-talk that just takes a little bit more thinking to unwire, rewire. So self-talk trainer, custom chat GPT made by yours, truly Angela Shorina, executive coach, rewire negative self-talk in 60 seconds in a simple four-question CBT flow. First, let's learn about CBT. What is CBT or cognitive behavioral therapy? It is hands down the most effective type of therapy that helps you. So, cognitive behavioral therapy, I'm reading to you from Google, is a type of talk therapy that helps people identify and change harmful thought patterns and behaviors. It is a structured and goal-oriented approach that focuses on current problems to improve a person's mood and ability to cope with life's challenges. CBT is used to treat a wide range of issues, including depression, anxiety, chronic pain, but a lot of other things. There is CBT for insomnia, for example. All of that to say that the way you talk to yourself influences all of the things you end up doing in life. And if there is one thing that stands in the way of many high performers to deliver their full potential or perform at their highest level, for example, during tennis tournament or during your public talk, or during this difficult negotiation with maybe a client of yours, what stands in the way most and foremost is your suboptimal self-talk. So this sequence will help you to learn how to restructure on the goal, rewire that self-talk into a more optimal one that helps you to feel more confident, more empowered. So you get out there and start moving closer and closer towards your goals and dreams and desires and objectives with more with a better, more consistent pace. So, CBT, how it works, it operates on the principle that your thoughts, feelings, and behaviors are interconnected and influence each other. The way you think will change the way you feel, will change what you do. The therapy involves working with mental health professionals to become more aware of and helpful thinking patterns such as catastrophizing or jumping to conclusions. By recognizing these patterns, you can learn to challenge negative thoughts and develop more effective ways of responding to challenging situations. The goal is to develop new skills and perspectives that lead to more positive outlook and behavior. So now let's jump into our custom GPT, a self-talk trainer. It is linked in the show notes. So try it out. The description of the self-talk trainer rewire negative self-talk in 60 seconds in a simple four-question CBT flow. And there is um sort of a button in the middle, help me change my negative thinking. So let me press this button and see what Chat GPT speeds out. ChatGPT, got it. Let's start your first thought restructuring rep. And rep because thinking is like muscle you build in the gym. The more reps you do, the more the stronger your muscle becomes, the more conditioned, the more results you're gonna see. So thinking is the same. It's not like you do it once and you're cured for life. You need to put in the reps to rewire your thinking, to then change your personality and what you do and your future. Then a chat GPT says, number one, what's one thought that's making execution of focus harder right now? If you're not sure, I can show you a blank worksheet, a quick example to edit. Now let's put in one negative thought example. Let's say the week didn't go that well, and we think we are useless. So I'm typing, I'm typing this in. The week didn't go well, just like the the week, the week before, and I'm feeling like a total failure. And press enter. Chat GPT, thank you for sharing that. That sounds heavy, but also really common for high performers. Let's take this one step at a time. Automatic thought, I'm a total failure. I'll assume this situation is a couple of disappointing work weeks in a row. Correct me if I'm off. So, the next question: evidence. What's the actual evidence that this thought, I'm a total failure, is true? What's the actual evidence? Try to name specific facts and moments that support it, not just the feeling. I didn't hit my sales targets as planned for a few weeks in a row. I feel there is something wrong with me. Everyone, there is something wrong with me. Okay, let's just stop here. Do one thought at a time. So Chad GPT, that's honest and understandable. Missing targets can easily spiral into self-doubt. Guys, isn't that true? Like some evidence will spiral you into some negativity. Then it asks the second question in the four question sequence. Let's continue. So, question number two universal truth. Would everyone agree that missing sales targets for a few weeks means you are a total failure? It's not about you know the fact that I haven't missed my targets, it's about the fact that now I'm spiraling down into this conclusion, I am a total failure. So ChatGPT asked as instructed as trained on cognitive behavioral therapy. Okay, so the question, would everyone that's missing sales, would everyone agree that's missing sales means you're a total failure? If not, what might the subjective or exaggerated if not what might be subjective or exaggerated about that thought? So is it universal truth that you know if you miss your sales, you're a total failure? And then well, I guess, well, I guess I exaggerating I just and missing sales means I haven't learned or understood something yet. Then chat GPT exactly that's a much more balanced way to see it. Nicely spotted. Let's go to question three hurting or helping. When you think I'm a total failure, does that thought help you grow or move forward or does it hold you back? Let's reply. It's it holds me back, it definitely holds me back because then I feel demotivated, like it's all pointless, and I don't want to do anything, and I just want to quit. Let's live waiting for ChatGPT. ChatGPT, that's really clear and it shows great awareness. You're noticing how the thought directly affects motivation and behavior. Let's move to question number four. More helpful thought. What's a more useful, believable way to think about the same situation? Something that acknowledges this aspect but keeps you moving. If you'd like, I can help you create one. Want me to start with a draft? Let's say yes, please. Yes, please, because I'm having troubles to come up with something more productive and helpful. So here is a grounded draft you can test. Missing targets means I'm still learning what works. It's a feedback, not failure. I can analyze what didn't land and make one small adjustment this week. It keeps then ChatGPT continues, it keeps the honesty, you didn't hit the targets, but removes the global failure label. Would that warning feel believable enough for you, or should we tweak the tone more motivational, more factual, or gentler? Oh, that will work. That will work. You're right, you're right. I'm not a failer. I just need to analyze, learn, just ask for help, and keep moving. Just like everyone else who achieved great things. Right? You see where I'm thinking, what I'm thinking right now, it is more useful, helpful. Because at the end of the day, if you don't move, guys, then if you don't take actions, if you don't learn, like definitely nothing gonna improve if you just sit there, ruminate, and think you're a failure. Okay, so ChatGPT replies, perfect, that's a strong and balanced reframe. You turn the self-attack into a growth statement. Let's seal it with one next step, uh less than 10 minutes. Something small and concrete you can do right after this to reinforce this new thought. For example, review one sales conversation or email and note what could be improved, or message a colleague for a quick perspective. What's one small next step you'll take? I'm gonna ask one of my business owners, friends for advice and take on this. So chat GPT. Excellent. That's both proactive and relational. You're turning self-criticism into learning and connection. Here is your quick recap situation two rock sales weeks, automatic thought, I'm a total failure, balanced thought, missing targets means I'm still learning what works. It's a feedback, not failure. I can analyze, learn, adjust, and ask for help. Next step reach out to a business owner friend for advice. Would you like me to export this as a one-page PDF worksheet default? Or would you prefer doc or excel shit? Please export this into a PDF. Into PDF. Okay, hit enter. Let's see what chat GPT does. It's analyzing. Let's give it a little bit of time. And it's still analyzing because sometimes it takes its time to think. Last time I did it, it gave me a PDF report right away. But sometimes it takes, yeah, okay, so it gave me the report. So we click download, and it's now open and it has the whole sequence here. So thought restructuring 2025, 10, uh October 24th, situation, the facts only, automatic thought, emotions plus intensity for a question check, one next step, and optional. If I'm start thinking I'm a failure, then I'll pause, review what I can learn and take one small action for it. So it's generated this report, and then it gave me a message. Nice mental rep today. You caught and wired a tough thought into a learning mindset. Was this helpful? Want to do another thought now or pause here? I'm or I'm okay for now. I'm okay for now. Thanks. And now there should be a final message. So you're welcome. Great work today. Just like the gym, each rep like this strengthens your ability to generate useful balanced thoughts under pressure. If you ever want to go deeper on applying this in leadership or founder contacts, you can connect with executive coach Angela here. And it links to my LinkedIn and then says, take a breather, you've earned it. So that's what I designed. If you are curious to try it out and also share with people you know who might have, you know, this negative self-talk and might want to train it. And this is my first tool in a series of tools that I'm going to be building in under this umbrella of mind gym. With this idea that mind, mindset is like a muscle. And by the way, all high-performance psychologists prove this. It's like a muscle or a habit. The more you train it, the stronger and better and fitter it gets. So that's the idea behind behind this project. Please try it out. Give me some feedback. It allows to send me feedback emails if you find some, I don't know, bug or something you'd like to improve, let me know. And share it with other people, definitely. And let's all become masters of our mindset because that drives like how we feel in our life and what we end up doing. And the whole pursuit of my life is helping everyone and anyone to grow more of their potential, their seed of greatness, nourish it and sprout it into some magnificent tree of human accomplishment. So that's the goal. The link to my custom GPT self-talk trainer is in the show notes. Please use it, uh share, give me feedback. And till next time, thank you guys for tuning in. Thank you for learning, working on yourself, growing and changing. And till next time, stay awesome, have an amazing weekend, and try myself talk trainer. Talk to you soon, be awesome.