Mic Drop Moments: Overcoming the Fear of Public Speaking

Conquering Stage Fright: Expert Tips and Techniques

 In this episode, I dive deep into overcoming stage fright, drawing from my early experiences of stepping onto the stage with nerves and sharing fascinating historical facts like Thomas Jefferson's aversion to public speaking. 

We discuss common fears such as being judged, forgetting your lines, and handling small versus large audiences. 

I provide you with actionable tips and powerful breathing exercises to manage those jitters and deliver confidently.

 Remember, your calling and preparation matter more than the audience's opinions.

 Join me as I offer practical advice and encourage you to embrace the excitement and nerves that come with your mission. Practice those breathing techniques, and step boldly into your calling. Tune in for more expert insights on StorySpire!

00:00 Introduction to Storyspire Podcast
00:19 Overcoming Stage Fright: Lessons from History
02:35 Identifying and Addressing Common Fears
06:44 Practical Techniques to Calm Your Nerves
10:47 Final Thoughts and Encouragement

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Transcript

0:00

Welcome to the Storyspire podcast. I'm Mary R. Snyder. I am your host and storytelling strategist. I'm here with expert advice, actionable tips, and frameworks to create the stories that will inspire hearts and minds because stories change the world. Let's get into it. I've been a speaker for over 20, more like over 25 years. And I realized that this is something I dealt with a lot when I first started, but I've been comfortable on a stage for so long, but I wanted to go back to those early days when stepping on that stage, stepping onto this, the wings of a stage. Would send me into a little bit of a fight or flight and it's not a little bit It is a fight or flight. Now what I think is fascinating is that the way we stand on stage and speak We are judged a lot by that and here's one of the things that I found funny Is that as I was studying this fight or flight the stage fright is I learned that Thomas Jefferson, the signer of the Declaration of Independence and our 3rd president would have struggled to get elected today. And here's why he had a very high pitch voice and a slight list and he despised giving speeches so much. That he sent his State of the Union address to Congress by letter rather than stand up and deliver it in person. I just found that to be fascinating. Now, we would not put up with that today. We would require him to speak. Think about what we would have missed out on in Thomas Jefferson. So, let's not be like Thomas Jefferson. I want you to work on Handling those nerves. Now, I also want to tell you that there is a fine line between excitement and nervousness. Both of them can manifest very similarly. I can go into all the reasons why we feel like this, because we feel like we're under attack. And we go back into the way we were created to make sure that we're okay. We do the fight or flight thing. But let's talk about how we are going to deal with it. Now, number one, let's talk about what we're worried about. What are you worried about when you step on that stage? Now, I don't know about you. And I say this consistently. If I come off the stage and I haven't fallen down, I feel like I've won. Now, people laugh, but it's one of my biggest fears. And I've fallen off a stage before. It wasn't a long drop, and I was able to, like, pick myself up and gather myself. And I was not in the middle of speaking, I was, leaving the stage. What are we dealing with? Well, here are some of the things that I've recognized. In my past is the number 1 thing is I want the audience to like me. So, there's this fear of them not liking me a fear of being judged and I'm going to put that to rest because when you are stepping onto that stage. In the calling that God has placed on your life, you are speaking in and on the topic that he has given you and that you have prayerfully entered that ministry, that calling, and that you have accepted this opportunity prayerfully knowing this is where God has called you and you are Really, truly prepared and prayed up to step on that stage, then you don't need to worry about what anyone thinks that's on them. Not you, you do what God's called you to do. And I'm preaching to you and to me at the same time, because this is a tough one for all of us. There's also the fear of forgetting what I'm supposed to say, and I'm here to tell you it's happened to me, you know, and there's a fear of a big audience. Now, a lot of people say they are fearful of a large audience. I am more fearful of a small audience. And you're wondering, what? Because to me, it is harder to speak to a group of 20 than it is to speak to a group of 3, 000. Because in 3, 000, that's a lot of people. When it's 20, it's one on one on one on one. It's a little harder for me. We're all different. We're all unique. The fear of panicking. Like losing where you're supposed to be, losing your space, and then panicking, and literally asking for a do over. Now, if that happens and you have to ask for a do over, so be it. Such is life. You'll ask for the do over, and you will do over, but we're not gonna go there. The fear of looking nervous. I don't want to look nervous. I may be nervous, but I don't want to look nervous. Here are some external fears you may be dealing with, you know, that you are carrying this weight of what God has given you to share, and you want to honor that, and I don't think that is not a bad, and let's not call it a fear, it's a burden, and it's a good burden, you are fearful of the audience's reactions. You see somebody yawning or scrolling their phone, just assume they've got something else going on. It is not about you. I was recently speaking at an event and in the back rear of the room, there was a group of people talking and it was rather disruptive. So what did I do? I just kept going. Now everything in me was yelling. I wish they'd sit down and hush, but I just had to keep going. And here's why, because everyone else in that room was waiting for me to speak. They were there to hear what I had to say. I like to change that to hear what God had to say through me. You're fearful that your slides won't work, that the microphone might go down, that it's too dark to see your notes. That has happened to me. That's why it's so essential to check your stage. These are all natural. This is normal. Don't feel bad about this. Now, I want to give you some things to help you overcome your fears. Number one is knowing your message. Now you've heard me say, I don't want it rehearsed. It's your story. You're gonna tell it. So know how you will start. Know that opening. Inside and out. You want to know exactly the first words that will come out of your mouth and how they will flow. Know how you'll stand. How will you stand there? And we're going to talk about that in an upcoming episode. Is how Your body language impacts what you say. So know how you're going to stand. Know what you're going to do with your hands. Know where you're going to place your notes. And know how you will end your message. Now what does the middle look like? Well the middle is really you telling the story. So that's your preparation. But what do you do when you're standing the side of the stage and you are shaking? I have a couple of things I want you to do. I want you to stand upright and I want you to put your hands together as if you were praying, palm to palm, and make your forearms parallel to the ground. And then I want you to breathe in through your nose and hold it for a couple of seconds. And then I want you to push your hands together as hard as you can and squeeze the air out of your lungs through your mouth. So you're going to breathe in and you're going to squeeze your hands together and blow out all at the same time. And there is this release and what it does that releases the tension in your upper chest and it also engages your diaphragm as you push the air out. So it's a great exercise. Here's another one. This is gonna help slow down your heart rate. If you feel like your heart's racing, I want you to do this. And this is when I do side stage. Breathe in for a count of three through your nose. We're gonna breathe in, we're gonna do it together. You ready? 1, 2, 3. And then we're gonna breathe out through our nose for a count of three. 1, 2, 3. And you're gonna repeat that two more times. 18 full seconds. And you will be surprised at how much calmer you feel. It will settle your heart. And if it doesn't, then I want you to do it again. Now, if you feel yourself starting to panic, if you feel yourself starting to get that oh, oh, that feeling, I want you to take in one long, deep breath in. And at the same time, I want you to hold that air in your lungs. Then I want you to hold that breath as long as you can. Focus. And then I want you to slowly let that out through your mouth. This breathing technique helps calm our mind. Now, if you're someone who gets nervous standing on the side of the stage, these are exercises. That will greatly help you settle your nerves. What I like to do is, because I really don't get nervous, but I do want to settle myself before I step on stage, because I am super excited and I typically will do a long breath in. I'll release it and I may do that two times and then I will just say a prayer and I will say, Lord, More you, less me. Use me to the fullest of what you would have for me. I hand it all to Jesus and lay it at the altar and I step out. Excitement and fear sit side by side. Because we are handling such a big calling, communicating what God has given and gifted to us. That we do hold it a little different, that we do have a level of nervousness, excitement, responsibility, that we step onto any platform, whether it be a virtual event, which we don't even see how many people are there, or whether it's a live event with a handful of people, or a few people, or a few hundred, or a few thousand, it really doesn't matter the number, what matters is it matters. You are doing exactly what God has called you to do. You may feel a little nervous, a little unsettled at times, but know this. He has gone before you and made a way for you and this message. Step into what he is calling you to do. All right, go practice those breathing exercises. Thank you for spending your time with me today. I hope you enjoyed this episode.