The Sheila Botelho Show
Sheila Botelho is a business strategist guiding visionary leaders to more profit, freedom, and self-trust. With decades of experience in wellness, sales, and transformational coaching, she helps founders grow businesses that generate wealth and impact—without burning out or dimming down.
On this show, Sheila sparks future-focused conversations about growth, leadership, and the shifting landscape of business in an era of rapid change. Her self-trust-centered approach equips founders to align strategy with soul, scale sustainably, and create a legacy of influence and abundance that touches every area of life.
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The Sheila Botelho Show
This Is Your Season Of Becoming | EP 551
🔗 Mentioned on this Episode: Show Notes 👈
So many high achieving women are hitting the same moment right now. They can feel the old identity loosening and the next one not fully formed yet. If you have been craving a level of success that does not cost you your creativity, your well being, or your relationships, this episode is going to feel like a mirror. I am walking you through the first layer of a very real shift happening in women who lead, and why it matters for the woman you are becoming in 2026.
For so many of us, the identity that once kept everything afloat is no longer the identity that can guide what comes next. You might be noticing old habits fading, new desires rising, deeper softness returning, or parts of yourself you tucked away coming back online. You might be aware of how much you have been carrying for others, or how often you have pushed at the cost of your own nervous system. I share my own story inside this episode, including the moment I caught myself slipping back into overfunctioning after a year that demanded I lead differently.
If today’s conversation stirred something awake in you, you are meant to be part of the 2026 Visioning Experience on December 10. Get the link to join here.
This is your season of becoming, and it is right on time.
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The women I serve are some of the most powerful leaders I know, and so many of them are hitting the same inflection point right now. They're ready for a level of success that doesn't cost them their creativity, their well-being, or their relationships. And in today's episode, I'm gonna walk you through the first layer of what that actually looks like in real life. Because if you can picture the version of you who leads with clarity and precision while still holding softness, then you already know the pain of staying in an identity that no longer fits. And that's exactly where we begin today. Hi, welcome to the podcast. I'm Sheila Botelho, and I believe true success is built from the inside out. I have been settling into a new rhythm lately, and it has been changing the way I look at everything. And if you've been following along, I just recently moved and I've found that my weekdays now have this really grounded, cozy flow happening. Early mornings at the gym, I'm working out with my bestie, and we're doing a new weightlifting program, which is really great. We're so excited about what the results are already. And then having a quiet shower and taking my time getting ready, doing a bit of journaling, and then letting myself move into my day without rushing. And my weekends, well, they have been full in the best way. Getting to know my new community here at the lake, meeting beautiful people, settling into this new creative space, beach walks, even in the cold, and of course, the sparkle of Christmas with my loves. The twinkling lights, the soft glow in the evenings. It is balm for my soul. And through all of this, something has been moving in me. And it's a shift that I personally can feel in my bones, and one that I'm also seeing in so many of the women that I coach. And that's what today's solo chat is all about. It's about that shift, really just the first layer of it, because there is so much beneath that first layer that we'll get into another time. Because then next week on December 10th, we're going somewhere much deeper together. But today, I want to speak to what's rising collectively and why it matters for the woman that you're becoming in 2026. There is something that I don't think we talk about enough as high-achieving women. And that is that we can outgrow our old identity long before we've fully stepped into the new one. And that in-between space can look a variety of ways. It can look like you have old habits that are loosening, new desires surfacing. Things that used to feel normal and ordinary and acceptable suddenly feel off. You have a hunger for more creativity, maybe a pull towards softness and slowness, at least in some seasons of your life. And a little whisper inside that says, I can't keep leading in the way that I've been leading. And if you've been feeling that, I have too for a little while, actually. There's this moment that I caught myself operating from an old pattern. This pattern that had me moving into overfunctioning mode. And this is something that I actually have realized was a pattern in my past. And what brought up the overfunctioning piece was when I became a mother. I realized it had been very subtle previously in the other areas of my life, but it started to become more clear when I became a mother. And fortunately, I was able to address that as I parented. But what I didn't realize is that it was so beneath the surface, like just underneath the surface, that it would sometimes rear its head at times. And sometimes it would look like really taking responsibility for how loved ones were feeling. Taking responsibility for the success a client may have been having. And they they want to have this breakthrough, and I really want them to have this breakthrough. And so I would actually internalize some of that and think, how can I really help them move forward? And of course, as a coach, that is that's the role, is helping them move forward. However, predominantly, my role is to be a mirror and a sounding board and a safe space to be able to work through and advance in your life and business. And so not taking it on as my own personal project. So that I noticed was coming up because I had not been giving myself enough space to really go within, to shake it all off, to recalibrate. I found myself getting very, very busy and I had my hands in a lot of people's businesses. And this is the part that is actually quite vulnerable to talk about because I am someone who can hold a lot. I'm someone who has held a lot historically, my family, my business, my clients, my marriage, my private world, my emotional world, a whole lot of losses and making sure like people are thriving through those losses. And I've always been the person who can handle it. But this year, when I look back over 2025, my body asked me to lead differently. I had no choice. And now I am listening. So here is what I'm seeing in so many other women right now. And I'm speaking specifically to the women. I know I have some wonderful male listeners. This is about the ladies right now, but I'm so glad that you're here. If you are a man and you're listening to this, you have women in your life. I really would love for you to keep your ears open because this is going to be helpful for you to understand as well, to know what is really going on for these women who appear to have it all together and they do have it all together, but maybe how they perhaps are feeling on the inside. They're tired of being the capable one. They're tired of running on adrenaline. They're tired of building businesses that leave no room for their soul. And they're remembering pieces of themselves that they've tucked away. The artist, the dreamer, the writer, the musician, the intuitive, the one who used to play, the one who didn't need permission to feel joy. And there's a reason why this is happening now, and we're going to explore it more deeply on December 10th. But here is the tiny scratch of the surface for you. Your soul is calling you back to the part of you that existed before the world told you who to be. And for so many women, I'm so grateful for this, that voice is getting louder. Before we go deeper, I want to walk you through a few questions that I've been sitting with myself. And these are really tender. These get into the real story beneath the story. And they've opened something really big for me personally. It doesn't matter how far along you are on your journey, how many years you've owned a business, how many multiple six figures, seven figures, eight figures your business is, these will get you right where you're at. They'll meet you where you are. So the first one, first question. Ask yourself this question. Where did I learn to dim the most creative part of myself? When I think about myself as a child, like I've always been a singer. Before singing lessons, before art school, before performances, before recording studios, before bands, and all of the performance performance things that I did, I loved to sing. The music would be on in my house. My father would have it blaring on his amazing stereo. He had, he, he's what we would call an audiophile. He had so many albums. And I would sing along Roberta Flack, Peebo Bryson. I'd sing along, obviously, to Whitney Houston, but some of the old jazz artists as well. And I just loved it. Music has always been a way for me to express myself, for me to give myself hope, for me to mourn losses, for me to work through emotions, and for me even to deal with my next levels of leadership. It really fuels me. Music has been such an incredible creative thing. So what part of you have you been afraid to bring into your business? Well, when I answer that question, I realized for many years I've kept those things separate. I've kept my music separate from my business. But my music was always a part of every other area of my life. Friendships, family, my daily, my daily life. If you've looked at my website, I love kitchen karaoke. Like there's always music on. So what is it for you? Because guess what? That's the essence of who you are, whatever it might be. And it could be the thing that is missing in your business in order to give you joy to keep moving forward. The next question would be where did I learn to dim, oh, that actually, sorry, that was the first question. Where did I learn to dim the first, that most creative part of yourself? Okay, that was the first question. The second question was, what part of you have you been afraid to bring it into your business? Okay, so I just answered that one. So think about where did you learn that dimming it was the way to be? I will tell you for myself. The way I learned to, and where I learned to dim the most creative part of myself was when I stepped into the business arena. Because prior to that time, I was teaching English as a second language in Europe and Eastern Europe. And I would sing and we would do musical things, and I would, it was mixed into everything. It was just part of my life. And then when I stepped into the marketing space, I learned to put on a power suit with shoulder pads with my big hair and big earrings. Like these are not so big, but they're, you know, not as big as they were back then in the 90s. And like I learned this is the way business goes. It was like you have your personal life and then you have business, and they're completely separate. They don't, they don't creep in. There's no scope creep. So ask yourself that question. So number one was where did I learn to dim the most creative part of myself? Number two, what part of you have you been afraid to bring into your business? Number three, what identity have you outgrown and what is replacing it? Okay, now this is an exciting question. Because if you're like me, if you are approaching or if you're past midlife, I'm 53, you may be feeling like I'm quite happy to outgrow some old identities. And there's a whole lot of self-permission involved. There's so many ways people say it these days as well that are super fun. For me, as much as I love to be known as being very capable, highly effective, I'm done and I have outgrown the identity of being the capable one. I think that doesn't mean I'm not capable. It means I'm capable, but no being known as the capable one, the one who will always pick up all the pieces, the one who will always be there, the one who will sacrifice her own energy, time, emotions at the behest of everyone and everything else. No. So what is replacing it and what has replaced it? And I will say this has happened over the last five years. The person who has replaced the capable one for me has been the centered, expressed, intuitive leader. And yeah, I've always been that person too in my adult life, at least the last 15 years, I'd say, really is when I stepped into that. But that is my identity now. It's not just something that I do and something that may be a title of some kind. It's something I do. So what is that for you? What identity have you outgrown and what is replacing it? Such a powerful question. Fourth question What have I been carrying that's no longer mine to carry? For me, again, about well, frankly, I would say about 12 years ago, this really, really started for me. But I can only really identify and connect the dots backwards now, and really for the past couple of years have been able to. I was carrying a lot of other people's emotional layer labor, a lot of other people's expectations. I was carrying a lot of pressure, a lot of proving energy. Like, oh, let me show you how much I care. Let me show you how capable I am. And emotional labor is something that is unseen. And yet, so many women fully understand what that is when you break it down. And that is making sure everyone's okay, making sure that the emotions are taken care of and all of the details are taken care of. And it's not all women do this, by the way. This is an overfunctioning characteristic. And I will say, I realized about five years ago that was something that I had been carrying, overfunctioning. And so I'm so passionate about helping other women release that because we do not need to do that. We can take care of, as Terry Cole, one of my therapist mentors, says, we can take care of our side of the street and let other people take care of their side of the street. And we can still care about them and we can still be involved in each other's lives, but we're not needing to constantly, laboriously manage everyone's emotions. Our own emotions are enough to carry. So that's my, that was my answer to this question. What is yours? What have I been carrying that is no longer mine to carry? Could it be someone else's opinion of you? Like holding yourself back, possibly from doing that thing you really, really are led to do because some aunt of yours has some thought about you and you don't even see them anymore, but they have these thoughts about you. Could it be that? These questions are deep. I really hope you'll sit with them. The fifth question is who am I becoming in 2026? And what does she need from me right now? This is an exciting question because it's who you want to be. Who do you get to be? You get to be whoever you want. And knowing who you want to be is one thing. But then deciding and determining what does that version of you need from you right now, that takes a little strategy. For me, who am I becoming in 2026? You know, more of the embodied, discerning thought leader, the more artistic version of me, that's who I would say I'm becoming. And it's really number five here, who am I becoming in 2026? It's like the essence of the answers to one to four that we just did. It's exciting. You get to be who you want to be. Who is that? And so what does that version of you need from you right now? Possibly some intentionality, some time and space to really figure out what does that look like for you? And what do you need to let go of? And I think questions one to four really answer that. What I know for sure is this. This is a time where we're moving into a brand new year, and there's always so so much emotional charge and probably a lot of promotional charge around, oh, it's the end of one year and the beginning of another. And I am really passionate about this very conversation right now because you will never see however old you are right now. Like I'm 53, I'll never see 53 again. I'm moving into 54 by the summer at least. So 2026 is another new year. And asking yourself the question, how long do I want to wait before I really get to be who I really want to be? And before I get to have the life that I really want to have. This is this is the essence. And I want you to really listen to this. I'm probably going to say it twice. You can't vision your next level from an identity you've already outgrown. Let me say it again. You can't vision your next level from an identity you've already outgrown. You can't plan 2026 from the version of you that is exhausted. And you cannot call in expansion from a nervous system that doesn't feel safe to expand. These are things we need to do ahead of time. And that is exactly why I created the 2020 visioning experience, December 10th at 1 p.m. Eastern Time. And it's not a workshop or a planning session, it's an embodied recalibration. It's where we're going to return you to the woman you were before the world told you who to be. And then vision forward from that place. If today's conversation stirred something in you, you're absolutely meant to be there. More details are coming. You can see them in the show notes, but mark your calendar. This one matters. Thank you so much for being here today. I am walking this path with you, and I hope to see you there.