Andy Wells
I'm Andy - I went from depressed & suicidal to living a live of abundance & joy. If I can do it, you sure as hell can too.
I went from depressed, suicidal, obese & alone to a life full of friends & love, having plenty of wild sexual adventures, 3somes and more, making 5-figures a month from my coaching, helping other men and women live a life that's true to themselves, & living my own abundant & peaceful life I'm incredibly grateful for. Best of all, this community - you guys and gals - have come to feel like my family. Life is amazing, and I'm here to help you follow in my footsteps.
Andy Wells
You Already Know the Answer (The SOLUTION is Within You)
Feeling overwhelmed by life's problems and not sure how to turn things around? Listen as I share the importance of shifting our focus from problems to solutions and how taking action can make a world of difference.
🤝 The Abundance Collective (Our affordable coaching community $200/month) - EMAIL ME to join: https://kyil-extra.com/contact
🏆 DIRECT VIP ACCESS TO ANDY - HARDCORE COACHING PROGRAM:
Come be part of our life-changing coaching program, get DIRECT access to Andy & dominate your goals. You'll also unlock LIFETIME access to our members-only community of other men & women who'll support you on your mission until the day you die. No more excuses - you deserve to be happy. Jump on a free call with Andy to discuss: https://kyil-extra.com/coaching
▬ Socials ▬▬▬▬▬▬
▶️ My YouTube (with additional content not released on here): https://www.youtube.com/@Andy_Wells
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/andywellsishere
Twitter: https://x.com/andywellsishere
📧 My Email Newsletter: https://killyourinnerloser.com/newsletter
Ladies and people who have all of the solutions already. Andy, here I went from depressed and suicidal to living a life of sexual and financial abundance and joy. If I can do it, you sure as hell can too. This is the Kill Yourself Lose Show. Let's get straight to it.
Speaker 1:A lot of the time we're so focused on the problems in our lives and what's going wrong and we can get very overwhelmed and stressed out, and then we can get stuck in a I Can't Do It mindset, in other words, learned helplessness, and we start thinking it's helpless, it's hopeless, there's nothing I could do. I'm stuck and I'm overwhelmed by my problems and I'm not going to be able to fix them and I don't know where to start. Blah, blah, blah. I had this discussion with a coaching client of mine quite a while ago, and he made a post in the coaching group about all of the stress that he was going through and all of the things that were happening at work, and everything he wrote was just problem after problem after problem after problem, clearly getting himself very overwhelmed and stressed out. And so what I did was I went through and quoted every problem that he posted, and after each problem I said I want you to give me a solution or give us a solution to this problem. So, rather than just sitting there and listing out all of your problems, with each one of these problems that you wrote, write a possible solution. Write a possible solution. Write a possible solution. I just said that to every single problem that he listed, i said to him I don't want you to get there or to sit there stressing and feeling like a victim and feeling like it's helpless and phrasing things like all these problems are happening to you. Don't focus on the problems or the feelings, or the hopelessness or the stress. These are things that you're just kind of telling yourself, that are just making you spiral. What we want you to do is put all that shit aside. It's just kind of noise for right now, like yes, sure, the problems exist, but let's focus mostly on figuring out some solutions. So tell us one solution for every single problem that you wrote. I said if you can't think of a solution and hey, that happens sometimes, we can't always think of solutions Just say so and ask for help, and that's a solution. And to any of you listening, sometimes that is this solution. You don't know how to solve the problem, so you go and ask people hey, can you think of how I could solve this problem? Brilliant, that's a solution. Asking for help is a fucking solution. I'm sorry This guy replied to his own post and just listed out all of the problems again, but each time he said, okay, here's a possible solution to that.
Speaker 1:You know, my boss said my work isn't very good right now. Okay, i'm going to spend 10 minutes every day with my boss in a meeting saying, hey, how can I improve? Like, he just listed a possible solution for every single one of the problems that he had written. And so I said to him like awesome, so like, how do you feel now? And he said okay, i actually feel a lot better.
Speaker 1:And what I said to him and I'm going to say this to all of you was look, the answers were inside you the entire time. As soon as I get you to focus on looking for solutions, in other words, as soon as I get you to go hunting for those solutions instead of obsessing about the problems, you have a possible solution for every single problem. It's not like you're sitting there completely unable to think of a solution, and that's kind of the thing that we get caught up in. When we're so focused on problems We don't think that we're capable of coming up with a solution, we start talking in terms of a victim mindset. Like this is happening to me there's nothing I can do, it's hopeless, i'm stuck, it's always going to be like this And we don't even start the task of looking for solutions. But as soon as I got this guy and I've done this with plenty of other coaching clients and plenty of you listening as soon as I get him to actually start seeing if he can come up with any solutions, he came up with a solution to every single one of the fucking problems that he had listed. We, as in the coaching group, didn't need to do anything. We didn't need to come up with a single solution for him. He had them all inside him the entire time. He just wasn't looking.
Speaker 1:And that applies to pretty much every single one of you listening. Every single one of us has the power to fix our problems and build the life that we want. You literally already have everything that you need. You're just not pausing for five seconds to stop obsessing about problems and then actually looking for solutions. You're not searching inside yourself for an answer or a possible answer. You don't have to know if it's the correct answer. I think sometimes we stress ourselves out with that pressure as well. We go okay, i have to know what the solution is. No, no, no, just come up with a possible solution. Just come up with a possible thing that you could try, and then you try it, you see if it works, you see if it's helping, you see if it doesn't, you try something else. Blah, blah, blah. But we all have at least a couple of possible answers.
Speaker 1:I have never in my life met someone who tells me their problems and then I say, okay, just pause for five seconds. Can you give me just one possible solution Like it doesn't have to be a good solution, just can you give me a possible solution? Never in my life have I met someone who can't. I've met plenty of people who say I can't and then I go no, stop, let's pretend for five seconds that you could. So tell me a possible solution. Just think of the first thing that comes to your mind and they will eventually say something and I'll be like sure, let's try that, let's see if that works. I don't know if that'll work. Might be a good solution, might not be, but let's try it. Boom, now you have a fucking solution. It might not be the solution that you end up with, but it's a solution. You try that. You see if it works. If it doesn't, you try a different solution.
Speaker 1:And so I like to think of us as you know, people or vessels of fucking intelligence, or whatever. I like to think of us as like a filing cabinet that already has all the answers already filed away somewhere inside. It's just up to us to reach inside ourselves and go hunting for that solution. But a lot of the time we're so focused on the problem or we're so focused on our own helplessness and our own victimhood that we don't even try. We don't even see. If there's a solution inside, we just say no, i don't know what to do. It's like, have you even tried?
Speaker 1:This is something that my girlfriend, imogen struggled with a lot in the early days as well. She spent a lot of time just saying I don't know, i can't, and I gently banned those words from her vocabulary And I said, if you ever say to me I can't or I don't know how, i'm just going to gently bring it back to yes, you do, come on, try. And she was so sort of caught up in the first couple of years of saying I can't, I don't know what to do, and I would just gently hit the pause button and say is it true that you don't know what to do? Or are you just so desperate to say that you don't know, that you haven't even checked? Like, how can you answer me in five seconds with the answer of like I don't know? How could you possibly have that statement ready to go? How could you be? how could you know? I say to you do you have a solution? How could you say within five seconds I don't know. Five seconds is not enough time to know that you don't know. In other words, you only tried to think of a solution for five seconds. You're gonna have to try a little harder than that. Think for five minutes, think for an hour, and then you can say I don't know. And again, i've never met anyone who actually spends five minutes or an hour thinking, who then says no, look, i've thought for an hour. I don't know.
Speaker 1:Every single person is able to come up with at least a possible solution. Again, it doesn't have to be the right solution, it doesn't have to be a good solution. It can be a really dumb ass idea, but at least it's a starting point. Now we can try that. We can see it didn't work. We can try something else. Every single person I've ever got to focus on looking for a solution comes up with a possible starting point. And again, i said this earlier sometimes the starting point is all right. I genuinely don't fucking know, but I know that I can ask for help Okay, that's your solution.
Speaker 1:Asking other people. I can go read a book. I can look it up on YouTube, i can Google. Sometimes Google is the best goddamn solution.
Speaker 1:I have given that solution to so many of my coaching clients where they'll say what's the answer to this, andy? And I'll be like I don't know, why don't we Google it? Google is a fucking amazing and especially now that we have AI like chat, gpt and all the rest of them. Man, like we have the world's entirety of information and knowledge at our fingertips. Like, there you go, that's your solution. Go looking for the information, go looking for the solution. Or ask other people, ask an expert, ask your friends, post on a forum, post on Reddit, post on my forums, come to my coaching group and we can help you. Like there are all these solutions out there if you just are willing to look for them. And if you can't find any solutions, just ask for help.
Speaker 1:Cansors are somebody else has gone through this same problem, or at least they know someone who has, or they've gone through a similar one, and you can ask for help. And then they can go hey, why don't you try this? Why don't you make this your step one? See if this works, let's try it out. So you all have the answers within you.
Speaker 1:I like to say we're all versions of God. You are essentially all God. We just get so caught up in thinking like I'm hopeless, i'm helpless, i don't fucking know. So at the very least, you can ask other people for help and that is your solution. My coaching is obviously there. If you feel like you would need that, i would love to help. If you don't have any money for that, the forums are there absolutely free. Everyone on there is very, very, very giving with their information and their help. They would love to help you. So go out there guys. Look for these solutions. Realize that you have the power to fix your problems and build a killer life. If it is to be, it's up to me. You've got the solution inside you. Stop obsessing about the problem and just dive into the self and try and find those solutions. I promise you they are in there. They might not be the correct solution that you end up with, but I promise you have a starting point inside you, as always. Ladies and gentlemen, go out there and crush those goals.
