ND Admissions interns and co-hosts Catherine O'Leary, Hailey Oppenlander and Tajae Thompson are joined by fellow intern, Rory Finn and Rory's first-year roommate, Gador Aliseda-Canton. They discuss how they navigated living together as first-year students at Notre Dame and how what started as a random roommate assignment grew into a close friendship between the two of them.
ND Admissions interns and co-hosts Catherine O'Leary, Hailey Oppenlander and Tajae Thompson are joined by fellow intern, Rory Finn and Rory's first-year roommate, Gador Aliseda-Canton. They discuss how they navigated living together as first-year students at Notre Dame and how what started as a random roommate assignment grew into a close friendship between the two of them.
FULL TRANSCRIPT (with timecode)
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Welcome to College Bound: Intern Edition, we’re your host I'm Catherine O’Leary.
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I'm Tajae Thompson
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and I'm Hailey Oppenlander.
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And we are here to give you the student take on Notre Dame.
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Welcome back to another episode of College Bound: Intern Edition, we’re your hosts I'm Tajae. I'm Hailey.
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And I'm Catherine.
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Today, we're here with two very special guests, one of our very own interns, Rory is here. So, hey, Rory, can you give us your ND intro?
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Yes. Hi, everyone. I'm so excited to finally be on the podcast. You guys are doing great things. My name, of course, is Rory. I'm a junior from Dallas. I'm currently living in Pasquerilla West Hall, otherwise known as P-Dub, and I'm a psychology and Chinese major with a digital marketing minor. And I'm so excited to introduce my freshman year roommate, Gador.
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Hi, I’m Gador. I'm a junior from Seattle, Washington, currently also in P-Dub and majoring in business analytics and economics.
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Hi, Gador. It's so great to have you on the podcast. So something interesting about Notre Dame is that we randomly are assigned to our first year roommate, and this is like a great opportunity to meet new people. So I kind of want to hear our other hosts thoughts and their experiences with their freshman year roommate. So, Hailey, can you tell us how that experience was for you?
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Yeah, so my freshman year, I was placed in a quad in Badin, and they're pretty tight. They're only two rooms. So all four of us slept in the same room, and we had a tiny little common room. And even though it was tight, it was pretty cozy. And it was great just having three people right off the bat that we could go to all the Badin events for and just hang out with each other. And one of my classmates is still my roommates now. So it was a really great experience. We probably wouldn't have met each other otherwise because we're different majors from different parts of the country.
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But she's amazing, and I love her so much, and I'm really grateful for the random roommate process.
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That is so sweet. Catherine, how about you? How is your experience?
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My experience was absolutely great. I was paired with a woman from L.A. and I'm from South Carolina. So that was kind of exciting for both of us, I think, to kind of get to know each other. And just kind of I guess there's someone that's kind of grown up differently than you and had different experiences, but absolutely great person. I feel like I lucked out. She's a gem and we didn't end up living together the next year. But yeah, I mean, she was just she was awesome. She was the best friend I think I could have asked for.
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That's really great. And I had a similar experience. Still friends with my freshman year roommate, we lived together last year in a quad when I was a sophomore, and she's actually one of the VPs for J-Fam this year. We live in single, so she lives around the corner, but still a really great relationship. So now that we have, we do have a pair of first year roommates on here, I want to ask you guys the question. What was your first impression of each other when you guys met?
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I definitely thought that Gador was so sweet and really, really nice. She got there a little later than everybody else. So I remember during Welcome Weekend, a lot of the other girls who, all the incoming freshmen had their roommates, and they could, like, go to the events with them, but Gador got in a little late. And I was kind of sad because I really wanted to meet my freshman year roommate.
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But she came in, I think it was on Saturday. And yeah, we were we just started talking. I would say that we definitely our friendship picked up like a few months in, but yeah, she was just very smart. I could tell that she was like a very studious girl and had been working very hard in high school and was always on the phone with her dad working through like these very tough physics problems that were so much more intense than my own psychology classes.
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So, yeah, those would be my first impressions.
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Gador, how about you? How was your first impression of Rory?
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I think my first impression was pretty similar. I could tell Rory was a very smart and very sociable and nice. I did realize she was way more extroverted than I was, which kind of scared me at the beginning, but very good impression. And as I said, like, our friendship kind of took off a couple of months. And once the ice is kind of broken and I felt more comfortable with her and being around her and because she was like from a completely different part of the country than I am from and studying something completely different, it was really nice to meet someone and be friends with someone who's kind of so different and yet so similar.
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And you did you went through a lot of things together. So, yeah, that was kind of my first impression, too.
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When was the turning point in your relationship?
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I would say that I think it was the beginning of October. Like a little later in September, we had both realized that we,
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We both realized that we loved this artist Lauv, I don't even know if I'm saying that right, but I think someone brought it up and we were like, wait, we should go together. So it's kind of a bonding experience if we don't know, if you guys aren't familiar, the, I don't know how to describe it. There's a club or restaurant on campus that kind of is a venue for artists to come and sing. And he was coming to Notre Dame, it was so exciting.
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I was could not believe that he was coming to my university, which was just so weird. So, yeah, we made a day of it and Gador and I went. It was October 5th, so the night before my 19th birthday. And yeah, I would say that after that the ice was kind of broken, as I said, and we were getting more meals together. You know, talking about current events. I know we would talk about what was going on in the news, just like after we got home at the end of the day.
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And yeah, I think I think it did take a little bit to warm up it. You know, sometimes it's not going to be oh, my gosh, we're best friends from day one. But I think our story is a good example of, you know, things can take time, but good things take time.
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Yeah, kind of the echo that we really bonded over this artist, which is kind of random. But his dad actually teaches in my high school. And so I had like a personal connection. And so when I found out he was coming, I was so excited. And I think Rory was also excited. And we, like both mentioned how we really wanted to go. And so we like didn't have other friends who really knew he was because it was kind of prior to his, like, explosion, like his popularity. And so we both went together. And I think that definitely was the turning point because we bonded, like, so strongly over this one artist.
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And then we realized, like, there's a lot we can have in common. And then we had it in common despite being so different. So that kind of was the turning point.
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So what do you guys think makes your relationship as roommates and friends work?
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I would say like the fact that we both respect our differences and respect like each other's time and kind of like presence. We are really good at kind of setting boundaries and having like a I guess like appropriate expectations for being roommates and then being friends as well and knowing how to respect each other and each other's like space. So we knew, like when someone, like one of us is really stressed, like it's not like they respect her space and kind of.
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Yeah, I don't, I don't know. But I think the respect was huge and kind of made our relationship as strong as it is today.
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I would agree. I think that there was one,
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there's one tip that I have. I got these little mini lights that were touched so I could I put them under my closet. And so I, I, I needed to wake up earlier than Gador, I wouldn't have to turn on the major lights that would illuminate the entire room just, just not necessary at like 8:00 in the morning. So we did have separate class schedules, sleeping schedules sometimes. So I think that, you know, having those little lights to just turn on and so you could change without disrupting anyone, that was helpful.
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And I think just in general, we were very different, but we also were very similar. So like Gador, whose family is from Spain, and I thought that was so, so cool. And I don't know, I just in terms of like what made the relationship work, I would agree with Gador. I think we just respected our differences, but also
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realized that we were very compatible.
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I think touching on like the lights thing, like we're I mean, we're both very considerate of each other and like each other’s sleeping schedules. I remember one night like where she was studying late and I was going to bed. And so we like, put a towel, like on the bed. So that would kind of cover or like block the light so that I could sleep and she could study and we wouldn't bother each other. And I thought like that, like someone who was less considerate, would not have thought to, like, put a towel like so that we could both be in our rooms and like have like the right to be in our rooms and do what we need to do, but without impeding on the other person and bothering the other person.
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So things like small things like that or you like are considerate of the fact that your roommate also has the right to be in the room and also needs to use the room is something that's like huge on having a good relationship with your roommate and establishing like the foundation for a friendship or whatever kind of relationship you want to have with your roommate.
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That is so great to hear, like despite your differences, you guys are able to find common ground and still have such a great relationship. So we as you, as our listeners may know, we always offer up a piece of advice at the end of our episode. So now everyone on the call is actually going to give some, is going to share a piece of advice they have when it comes to handling the first your roommate situation. So I can start it off. And I think my advice would be to be open minded. This is someone who you don't know might be coming from a different country, a different state, and just a different walk of life.
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So it's important to be open minded and also to set boundaries early, because once again, you want to know people's sleep schedule. They could be a night owl while you are a morning person. So I think that's something really important that you just kind of set up at the beginning. So, Catherine, do you want to give us your piece of advice?
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Yeah, I agree with everything that's been said. And I think my, one of my foundational, I guess, philosophies with freshman year roommates just at the end of the day, like what takes priority in that space. You know, there's a lot of different ways you can socialize with friends and you can study whatever. That's fine. But I think at the end of the day, like, you know, people need to sleep. College is stressful. Academics are hard and sleep is so important. And at the end of the day, when people sleep, they're going to be nicer to you. So if you let your roommate sleep, then things are probably going to go better in general. So just, you know, even if you're on opposite schedules, just be considerate and hopefully they'll respect you and you can set things up by respecting them.
00:11:46:02 - 00:12:16:28
And I think just kind of in general, like, yeah. I mean, ultimately we're all humans were all like, you know, we all have weird quirks and, you know, we're all imperfect. And so the odds of literally nothing going, you know, no issues at all or no hiccups are low. But hopefully if you do, you know, if there is something that really upsets you about something that your roommate does, maybe you just think about whether or not it's worth addressing. And if you think it is, then to be direct and, you know, don't let these feelings build and, you know, you'll end up kind of just exploding.
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So I would just, I would recommend like being direct and being kind. But, you know, it is OK to say, hey, like this, this bothers me and, you know, and then maybe give an opportunity to say, like, if you could change one thing about how I'm conducting my life, like, you know, very open it back up. But I would just say, like, if you do have conflicts, just approach it with reason, you know, be reasonable and be kind to each other. But, yeah, I think the biggest thing is just respect and yeah. Respecting each other, being considerate.
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Thank you for that, Catherine. How about you, Hailey?
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Yeah, I would say try not to put too much pressure to on yourself to have a certain kind of relationship with your roommate, because the one that I have now with my roommate, we like kind of run in different circles and have different friends, but we're still extremely close and like I could not get through Notre Dame life without her. And that's something that, like, I didn't really envision when I came in. People here, a lot of stories, I guess, from alumni who, like all the people in their section, are like BFFs and they do literally everything together.
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And even though my roommate and I have sort of like separate friend circles, we still spend a lot of time together. And I think that honestly makes our relationship even stronger. And it's just so much fun to be in the room together. So, yeah.
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Thank you, Hailey. And Rory, do you want to give us your piece of advice?
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My piece of advice would be to always ask them questions. It's so nice. At the end of the day, if you come back and your roommate's like, oh, how was your day? And then you can trade stories about, like, anything that happened, just catch up about life. I think that's something that's so special that really only your roommate knows is your schedule, what goes on in your day to day life. And that's a great way for you to get to know them beyond just Notre Dame.
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Like you can ask them, I don't know, just like get to know them and ask them questions about their whole life, like what they did in high school, what was their high school life like. And I think that's a great foundation for a friendship, because if you know someone that way, I think it's a lot easier to be respectful and like they'll want to keep you happy. I don't know. That's a weird way to say that. But I think it's just that's a good foundation for like a positive, respectful relationship if you know each other really well.
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Thank you, Rory. All right. Gador. Take us home. Give us your piece of advice.
00:14:44:26 - 00:15:26:13
I think my piece of advice would be similar to Rory’s, and it's to make an effort to get to know your roommate. Everything is much easier if you are on good terms and they are friendly. And I know when it comes to like confrontation or like sending or confronting your roommate about something that like you need them to change, it's very scary thing to do, especially when it’s someone that's kind of a stranger, so being on good terms makes, like asking your roommate for a favor or asking them to like, if they have an early morning and you're trying to sleep to not turn on the lights, things like that, that are kind of scary to do, if you're on good terms and are friendly with each other, it’s way easier.
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So you don't have to be best friends. But being on good terms and being friendly makes everything a lot easier when there's issues that arise, regardless of how big the issue is.
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Thank you. So I want to give a big thank you to Gador and Rory for tuning in and helping us film this episode about our first year roommate experiences. And thank you to all of you for tuning in. And remember to follow our socials, ND admissions on Insta, Snapchat, Twitter and TikTok and also go check out our blog series at admissions.nd.edu. And remember, Go Irish.