162. Enough Is Enough, Part 3

Imagine a life where past traumas shape your future relationships and your faith becomes your ultimate fortress of strength. This is the story of Elizabeth Stewart- Williams, a woman who has turned her challenging personal experiences into a powerful testimony of faith and resilience. 

Her relationship experiences took a turn when she found herself in a marriage riddled with manipulation and narcissism. Elizabeth's struggle through her marriage and her courage to identify the abusive patterns is a conversation that unfolds in this episode. Through her story, we delve into the importance of recognizing the signs of abuse and the role faith plays in overcoming these adversities. We also reflect on Elizabeth's strength in the face of emotional abuse and how her faith in God's will helped in her healing journey. Truly, Elizabeth's story is a testament to the power of resilience and the healing grace of faith.

Plan of Salvation:

• Hear: Romans 10:17
• Believe: Hebrews 11:6
• Repent: Acts 17:30-31
• Confess: Matthew 10:32
• Be Baptized: Mark 16:15-16
• Be faithful unto death: Revelation 2:10

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Contact Information:

Elizabeth Stewart-Williams, MDR
Website: www.iamprose.org
Email: elizabeth@iamprose.org
Phone: 713.820.6833/ 469.390.9024

A Call to Salvation

Transcript

Speaker 1: 1:30

And you have to understand during this whole timeframe, from the time that I got married, I was dumb, stupid ugly. You couldn't cuss at me because I would go off, but any other name you could think of, that's how he would come at me.

Speaker 2: 1:49

Welcome to the Call by God podcast with Adne Godin and myself, nixon Sylvain. This show is about dialogues of biblical characters and testimonies of Christians who submitted to the will of God. Each week, we bring on one guest so that they can share their story of how they were called by God. I hope this show inspires you. Enjoy Hello world. Welcome to another week of Elizabeth Stewart Williams testimony. Hope you enjoyed this episode.

Speaker 2: 2:22

So sit back and enjoy the ride. Be blessed, you know, because I have a question that I want to ask. I think it's going to bless somebody, because I know you've been violated, because I have a sibling that's been violated as well. And so my sister. She took the other direction. She decided that she liked women. So, instead of because she felt like she couldn't be with any men because of what happened to her when she was young, she's like okay, I'm going left, I don't want to deal with no men. And for you, on the other hand, you knew who you was as a Christian. You believe that it was a test where some women and there's, you know, people deal with their situation different, where you might have a woman or a girl that decided to sleep with multiple men because she's been violated.

Speaker 2: 3:07

She's like okay, well, I'm going to sleep with anybody and have different baby daddies. So you took a different approach, which I like about your story and I know you've gotten to a relationship, you know with your husband. But I want to know, like, how did he win you over? How did you not, how did you not like, have that? Look, I've been, you know, I already went through what I went through and I wanted to trust no man. Or was it because he had the image of a Christian or Christ like, or? I want you to explain that because I want people to really understand this.

Speaker 1: 3:40

He worked, he had to work. So like, for instance, when I say, like he showed up at worship, it wasn't like you're not just going to talk to me. That's how I was, like you're not just going to talk to me, right, he will come, like he will come, hey, you know. And then, at the same time, I also was introduced to him at one point, but I was still like it's me and Jesus, like I'm good, walking with him, right, he was, he was, show, he would show up, he would show up at, found out where I worked, show up at my job. I have roses. He show up, show up. Yeah, like it was.

Speaker 1: 4:32

It wasn't he put in some work, he found out, found out where my dad, my dad, was preaching at or where he was teaching at. He show up there, he showed. He even took my mom a grocery shopping. Like he, he put in some work and it it took some and lived, lived at the church. We lived there, we lived there. Actually, he was baptized by some of the pioneers in the church. We were having a crusade for Christ and who was at his, was at the baptism, was brother, brother Maxwell, brother Evans, brother who brother? Pretty much, pretty much anyone major that you could think of in the body, because it was body of Christ in in Houston and he got, he got baptized. That talk he was taught by by the great, what you would consider the greats right, yeah, no, he put that work in.

Speaker 2: 5:38

All right, so you could. You could talk about now when he said because you made me wait, I'm going to make you wait, I'm waiting.

Speaker 1: 5:44

It was no. So I, I called my mom and I said, hey, it's not going to work, this ain't going to work, right, because? And then I was because of what I, especially because of what I went through, I was in no like if I saw signs like I'm out, that's what it was Like. Okay, you going to act this way, be blessed. I wish you well and on your journey, and I'm out. You know what I'm saying. I didn't play, oh, I, I so.

Speaker 1: 6:19

But here it is, my mother is sitting here telling me you didn't just marry him, you married, you married God. And because I understood what that meant. So what that meant was because I married, I married to God, I got to, I got to put in the work, because true love works, it's a work that goes into that. And so my mom asked me a series of questions. Did he put his hands on you? Did he do this? Did he do that? No, no, no. She said, okay, well, your better is not here. You just started on your worst. And I, I cried, I cried and I was like why? And that goes back to that question, why? And then it from there. It from there was like a I never had a honeymoon period. I don't know what that is. When people talk about that, I'm like that's cute, don't know what that is. It was. It was a turbulent.

Speaker 1: 7:28

That's when I found out everything that was presented in premarital. That was a lot. What was presented was straight front, like it was. I was like wait a minute. So you, because I didn't have any debt, you know, the only thing I had was student loans. I didn't, I didn't use credit cards Like I'm, I'm, you know. I saw I'm sitting here looking like wait a minute. So that's not your account, that's your dad's account. They have the same name. So how much credit did you like? So what's going on?

Speaker 1: 8:05

You know, everything was a lie. Everything, down to down to the car. Everything was a lie and it was like okay, how do I move from this guy? Because I couldn't trust anything, like even like I could not trust anything. He would do stuff like we had we had a joint account together. He would take, take all the money out of the account. He would take all their money out of the account.

Speaker 1: 8:43

There was an incident where he was like the, the, the setup or the way that it was set up, was there was someone, there was someone else that was supposed to handle the family accounts and I was supposed to give them their, their checks which was his mom at the time and I was like, no, that's not going to happen. It was, it was if, I, if, if, if, if you could take that moment and put it in a movie, it would be unbelievable. And it was like, oh my, like I said, what in? So you don't have, you don't have your own account, you don't have this, you don't have that. No, didn't have any of that. So everything that was presented to me was a lie and I literally was like I, I. At one point I was like God, just take me, just take me, because what is this, what is this? So I'm struggling with not only the from the physical perspective, but then also the financial.

Speaker 1: 9:57

It would be stuff like our first year of marriage. We went through like two apartments. What we, what? What we would go through is like I would literally go to work and I would come back home and he's moved us out of the whole, out of the whole apartment, and I didn't, I didn't know. And I'm coming home to like a note saying, hey, we've moved, come to this address, and so I would go to the address and I got people clapping and saying, oh, this is so sweet, y'all are in a new place. So he would move me and we move to a new apartment. And we'd be in a new apartment, a new place.

Speaker 1: 10:33

He did that with my vehicles. I had a truck. I had was was we had just are about to pay that truck off right. Took my truck in he was supposed to get an oil change on it. Took my truck, got to, got now he would get the car that I like. So I love the jack. He got the jack, but then guess who. But so he picked me up. I'm coming there all outside clapping, and at that time you don't, you don't, or. What I was taught was you don't embarrass your husband or you don't have conversations, are you? What you do is privately. You'll talk later. But if I know what I know now, I would have been like I'm not signing for that, right. But they all came out clapping. All you have to do is sign here and it's yours. And I'm looking like what is this? That's a $700 car note. Why would I do that? But that's the stuff that he did.

Speaker 1: 11:33

And so throughout my marriage. It was almost like we moved multiple times. It got to the point where I got to the point where I say you know what? You can't do this again. Like, if you do this to get like I'm going to be living, like we need to be a part of it. And it was. It was a literal work. It was like I would tell God, okay, god, like, because I don't, I don't, I don't know how to do, I don't know how to do this, and you have to walk me through it because I'm when, I'm angry. But then too, it's like I'm embarrassed, like I don't know what's going on. And it was it every, every step, with something new of drama every step. And it was just like what in the world? And so it got to the point. There were times like he made what he determined what he made, so he worked, he worked for the railroad, so he determined what he made, and he, he, he wasn't going to work. So it got to the point where we were just living off of me and I'm coming home to eviction notices on our door and I'm like like what is this Right? So again we're, we're steady stead, things are steady, happening that. I'm like what. So I don't know what a hun.

Speaker 1: 13:05

So my first, my first two years, was like a. It was like a horror movie and I'm like stressed, like went from one. But God, this is a thing God would bless me from. So I was a paralegal. I was supposed to go to law school but I put that off. So as a paralegal, I went from one law firm God bless me to get a position with the federal government. So I learned this. So I learned in different sectors what type of law? Because I said, okay, I'll just take this time to determine what type of lawyer I wanted to be, because that was the idea. But, um, but God, so he progressed me in that way. But he got to the point to where it was like it was. It was so stressful and it was like, okay, like I need to get out of here. So it was like my.

Speaker 1: 14:10

After we were together almost two years and I said I just can't do it. And people are telling me you know you can't divorce. And he would always tell me this you can't divorce, I haven't cheated and I will tell anybody, anybody who tells you that run, because that means they are Right. So he would tell me all the time. You can't. He. He knew it was bad. You can't, you can't go anywhere. I haven't cheated when it got really heavy.

Speaker 1: 14:40

I come home to a note and he's completely moved the home and I'm in another apartment and they're outside clapping and he had that much Because I'm looking like how are you able to do it? It's my credit, like how are you able to do it? But during that time frame, the way that they looked at credit was, you know, especially if y'all were married, like you could take my social and put it with my husband. It wouldn't even. It wouldn't even show up on my, on my credit report. It would show up on his. You would have to run the number. And so I mean, I went through it. So finally, at one point came home, it was in Viction. Notice he playing video games.

Speaker 1: 15:24

I'm like I'm this, is it Like I, like we just need it in this. And I was like I guess I'm just going to be single for the rest of my life. Because that's why everybody was like you can't, you know, do this. And now that I those portions of the scripture. So this is the thing my parents taught me. They taught me clearly how to go back to the scriptures and study for myself Some things you know you get lazy with at times and you don't, you don't you? Just, you know, pick up what people say, but when you're going through it, you should take the time to really look at what the scriptures are saying so that it can apply appropriately to your life. So during that timeframe, honestly we should have separated, because if we were to separate it, I feel like I would have found out more, but everybody was telling me you can't do that, which was it true? We are curious.

Speaker 2: 16:23

I'm curious. I'm curious, I'm sorry I got to ask you this question Because I've been married for 10 years now and again, like I said, I got a real crowd out here and I know they someone out there saying, like, nick, you got to ask them. You got to ask them question Because we know when people come together except the Lord build a house, they labor and they have to build it. You know when we this is something that we tell people as Christians like marry somebody that's Christian, build a foundation. And I know somebody that likes and like, wow, they did everything right, she's a Christian, he's a Christian, they got God. It's supposed to work. But we know, as marriage, we're going to have our ups and downs. But, man, where was God in this and how did? Did you guys even try to come together to resolve it? Like, walk us through that, because somebody might be going through it right now. They need to know.

Speaker 1: 17:06

It wasn't an authentic, I would say and I don't want to so much so speak to where he was but an inaction. Okay, so in action, it was not an authentic love for Christ that I believe he possessed, an authentic love, so one that's balanced, and then, of course, we'll get to types of narcissism, but one that's authentic is one that is like your desire and your goal is to really try to do what God has called you to do when you're authentic in it, but when you're about manipulation and getting over it doesn't matter. So that part doesn't, it doesn't, doesn't even register. Actually, the joy is I got over, like I was able to get by verses, and I think that's the thing that people have to, you know, marry people a lot of times are quick to say you know you got to do this, this, this and this, but you don't understand. You really got to look at the antenna of the person that you're with.

Speaker 1: 19:23

So I like, if I told this same scenario excuse me, if I told the same scenario with someone who was really desiring to have a relationship with God, then the work looks different versus the manipulation which leads me to. That's what happened. So after, because those first two years I'm just like, okay, well, maybe he doesn't understand. Those first two years were hoping, okay, let's try this, all right, so maybe he doesn't. There are some things that I found out in the family that he experienced and he went through. Okay, let's work here, let's go, let me try this. Right, let me attempt to do this, let me I mean everything you could think of, from counseling to us, trying me saying, hey, let's go on trip.

Speaker 1: 20:19

He didn't want to go on trips, let's do this. And you have to understand, during this whole timeframe, from the time that I got married, I was dumb, stupid ugly, you can't. You couldn't cuss at me because I would go off, but any other name you could think of, that's, that's how he would come at me. And so I'm sitting here and I'm thinking, which again goes back to really there should have been a separation, because it was. It was clear chorus of control.

Speaker 3: 20:53

Matthew's 18.

Speaker 1: 20:55

Yeah, so I should have during that timeframe, because it was, it was toxic, it wasn't a good thing. But what I did was I was like, okay, as I stay and I pray and God, god will work me through this, we'll work through it. But it takes two. It takes two. And when you're with someone who willingly like so I give an example we had rent was due. I came home, I changed it. I mean, I did everything you could possibly think of and I was like, okay, you take care of this one bill and I'll take care of the rest. You take care of this one bill. And he had a Corvette. You had a Corvette.

Speaker 1: 21:33

When I met him and I don't believe, I don't believe in changing any man. I've never believed that. I believe you, you respect where people are in their journey and where they are, and God is the only one that can change a person, right? So believe who you see. And and so me coming in saying, hey, you got to get rid of this car, this, I was never that person. But yeah, so he had a Corvette. Fine, okay, you pay this one bill. He took the money and he, he bought brand new pipes for his Corvette and I'm like did what happened with the rent? Did you, did you pay the rent? Rent wasn't paid and so I was going just going through it, so finally got so cool. I was like, okay, I can't, I don't care what nobody is saying this, it is what it is Because I can't.

Speaker 1: 22:34

And that is when, when you're dealing with somebody who's manipulating, that is when we got into our first physical altercation, and because I was like we just need to and I was, I was blunt, I was more blunt than I am now. I was like, hey, we just need to call it what it is and what this is. It's just not going to work. We just need to let it go. And I'm headed to the bedroom. And that's when he grabbed me up by my neck, threw me up against the wall, told me if you ever leave me, I kill you.

Speaker 1: 23:09

I'm the type that is like again the Leninger's David Peter is in me. I'm like and then I'm athletic. So if we go, if is this what we doing today? Okay, and I went like we had a all out fight. We had a all out fight to the point I live. We lived on the third floor. I literally opened up the window to jump out. He had pulled me back in but we had a all out drag out and then I was able to get away because he took my keys. I was able to get away. Ran called, was called.

Speaker 1: 23:57

My mom did not tell my mom was going on, but she could see it because out of like, out of like, out. And so my mom, she came and she looked at me and she asked me. She said she didn't ask me if he, if he hit me because I wasn't even going there, because as black women, we are taught you keep it private, because if you open it up, you're going to open your family up to to, to something you might not want at the time. Right, and I'm sitting here thinking, hey, if I tell so my dad, don't get it twisted. My dad isn't a minister, my brother evangelist ministers, but if they, if this gets out to them Like this ain't gonna be good, and then it'll get out to the family, it ain't gonna be, it's not gonna be good.

Speaker 1: 24:53

So my, my mother, she looked at me and she's she said what do you want to do? You tell me what, what you want to do. I support you. And so I was like mom, I was like, hey, let me stay here, you know, in the hotel. So she paid for me to stay there for like a week.

Speaker 1: 25:13

I said, let me just you know now, by this time my ex had called my dad, my friends, and basically was like Flipped it and made it seem like it was me, like I was the one that was, you know, having his issues. But I was just like, listen, I Didn't discuss it with anybody, I only discussed it with him, not knowing he was making these phone calls. So my dad being a counselor Suggested, and my dad didn't even know what happened. They're just thinking I went off on him because, again, I'm from that lineage, like you not. And and what my people knew about me is, I'm not, I'm not just gonna accept anything. So when that occurred, when so this, that that time my dad was like baby, you got to calm down. He didn't know that he had put hands on me and I didn't. I didn't change that, that viewpoint, because that's just not what you do At the time.

Speaker 1: 26:23

So we went to counseling. We went to counseling for Up to six months and that counselor was look, looked at me. We had one session and then finally I had a session and she looked at me. She was a Christian counselor and she said, she said he needs to get diagnosed. I was like what? She was like there's a disconnect, said, didn't understand her at the time and I said, well, she said, try them, try to Do what you can do, but there's a disconnect and I don't think he'll ever really Get it or understand. And so I was like, okay, I didn't. At that time I was like, but he had did everything that I had requested, he had. He went to All the counseling if different things like that.

Speaker 1: 27:23

So when he knew or he felt that I would possibly leave, things got a little bit better. It was a little bit better. But if I know what I know now. So we're going into now, we're going into a good four years of marriage. And now I'm I'm like, okay, i'ma go to law school. I looked into the law schools, I Began to put my paperwork in. I told him, hey, I'm about to go to law school.

Speaker 1: 27:56

Then all of a sudden he was like hey, I want to, I want to have a baby. And I'm like God, it God does not want this marriage. God's not what this marriage happened. But and he was like no, I really want, I really want a baby. This is it. And I Thought what I thought I was making sure I was on birth control. What's not gonna happen is that again because we had come so far, and when I tell you, like the work that was done, so here it is now, four years later, which we're just now, you know, coming to.

Speaker 1: 28:37

It was. You know it was a uphill battle. So so now to bring a child into this, I was like mmm and me, and literally three, four months in, after he said that I can pray me. So I'm like what in the world? And then that's when the abuse really occurred and that's when the abuse really started. And If it became, it wasn't until I got pretty big. So I don't know the feeling of when you're hungry and you ask your spouse to go get something to eat and he brings you food. I didn't. I didn't experience that. I didn't experience Even even just going to the store and saying, hey, okay, we gonna have a baby shower, let's pick some stuff out. Then it was all out fights, like he would get angry and he would go in on me, and what I started noticing is as I got bigger, as I got bigger with child, that's the more bold. And he became and um, that was the first time that he had ever Called I was.

Speaker 1: 29:58

I was like eight months pregnant and we were on the highway and traffic and he's calling me the B word. And I looked and I, because I can't handle that and I got out the car, uh, on the highway, my pregnant sale. He's like no, don't, do you know? Those were the stuff like so it just Progressively just got bad, it got back, but the blessed so. So during this timeframe I'm pregnant. He's calling it like, like I said every day was you're done, stupid ugly. But but when I would go to work was just why I say, when you stay with God and I'm, I'm steady, I'm steady going to church, I'm steady living, live. Because I, because I did not understand To, I mean, I did not understand, like why I felt like I was being punished and I was like, okay, um, but he would call me every name that you could think of, except for cuss words, but then I would go to work.

Speaker 1: 31:03

So I took the t? Re, the train, into Dallas and it would be amazing the amount of compliments that I would get. And I'll be like you know, he's calling me ugly and fat. That morning I'm with your child and here it is. I would just be there and it would. It would be the nicest, the sweetest people. And they were like, oh, my goodness, you are so pretty, you know, and it would be like, and I'd be like looking like, and one one day, what he, what he said, rattled me because you know, you, you're, you're spreading, and he said things that I'm like, I couldn't see my feet at this time.

Speaker 1: 31:43

And this man, he, literally he stopped and he said I just want to tell you. He said do you want me to tie your shoe? And I'm, I'm like crying because I couldn't, I couldn't reach down and tie my shoe, and he looked at me. He's like, oh, he said, let me tell you, you, you are so beautiful. He said, you are a beautiful pregnant woman. And I was like, I was like, right, and that's a crime. And I was like, right, I'm pretty, like you don't know what he's talking about, you know, and those were the things that that God, god would just steady, send me Things along the way and then, even being pregnant, like I took, I don't know what it feels like To be just taken care of.

Speaker 1: 32:28

At that time I did not know what it felt like to be taken care of. I paid, I paid the bills, I you know what I mean like, oh, if I wanted to eat, I had to figure out how to eat. He didn't. He didn't provide in that manner, like so it was almost like, um, there are times where the only time that that I would be like, oh, you know, I really want something, he would go out and get something. It was because he was hungry too, so it wasn't like, oh, it's just me, I didn't have that, I didn't know what that was and so.

Speaker 1: 33:09

But I was blessed at work because it was a bunch of men who were married, who had. You know, they would laugh at me because I love pizza. My son has a birthmark piece of slice. That's how much pizza I ate with him and I just they would come with like whole pieces and I would just be like it's static. But that's how God. God sent people in my world and in my life when I was going through all of that and showed me hey, you know, I'm here for you, I'm here, and I think that's as Christians, I don't think we understand, like when you are not doing what God has called you to do. You don't know you are that person that is supposed to come into someone's world and help them at a time when they're going. I was going through a major test, one that I can't even. It was a major test and there are people who just showed up in my test that let me know God is still here. And, as Christians, that's what we're supposed to do is let people know. I know you're going through it, but God is still here. So here it is.

Speaker 1: 34:26

I I ended up having and if when you look back at people say, what's one regret? I had got to the point to where I was just like I Couldn't continue to work because I had some complications. So they were like, hey, you kind of need to go home. But I worked for the federal government, like great benefits, and I was moving, you know, moving up in In that position. But something told me to go home. Now, if I look back, I wouldn't have went home. My mama beg. She was like, baby, don't do it like you don't have that type of man. Every man is not meant to just take on the care of the household. I don't think people realize that, especially when you have one who struggles with certain things.

Speaker 3: 35:20

Especially if he's not taught how to be a man, right? Yeah, it tells us in the Bible that the older men, the same way it says for the older women, to teach the younger. If he wasn't taught just because he was baptized again, whereas in the beginning he wasn't Disciples he was baptized right Because if he was taught, he would have understood his role as a husband. He would have understood his role. But he's, he was your class. He's he was your class. Classic Narcissist, which means he was a spoiled brat, like his family, probably allowed him to get away with murder. Right. And Because he got away with murder, he knew how to line it up Right. He knew how to like, paint the, the perfect picture to make people we what they wanted. He was the greatest illusionist, that's it.

Speaker 1: 36:15

We would go out and he would open doors. I used to call myself almost like a china doll, like even like before having my son. It was like he would go out, you would see us out and you would be like, oh my goodness, y'all are such a beautiful couple. He's open up doors, he's smiling this and that, and as soon as we got behind closed doors it was he wouldn't. He wouldn't talk to me or he would. You know, it was just Dr Jekyll Missile and you're looking like, but it was all for show because he wanted to make sure that it looked a certain kind of way and it was just. It was amazing. Even. It got to the point to where I have to check myself because I Was being a party to that, to the way that that he was operating, because I'm just I'm trying to. You know, I'm trying to get to a good point, and that's the thing is when you're in a relationship.

Speaker 1: 37:22

So course of control is a form of abuse. Course of control they seclude you from your family of Financial abuse is involved in that. You're going through emotional, a lot of emotional life. For instance, you're looking at the sky and the sky is blue and they're literally telling you the sky is green, like that's the steady mental Anguish that they, they'll steady put you through and it's not a normal. A lot of, a lot of women pre or when there is a, when there is a presence of potential, moving to domestic physical abuse, you normally see cursor control right before that time frame.

Speaker 1: 38:12

And so I mean, I, I Went, I went through it, but and I'll back up a little bit I Would be really frustrated, really angry. But my mom again, my mom will call every day hey, baby, how are you feeling? Okay, you gonna live right, regardless of whatever, and I would, I would be so angry. I'm like mom, he called me this, he did this, he said this, and she would say well, are you that notice? It's the questions again, it's the why. Well, why is that occurring? And a lot of times I would just want to wipe the while away and let's just go with, let's just walk, let's just try to get to a point where everything's okay. But it was never peace, it was never peace in the home, and so it was almost like. So my mom got to the point. She said, hey, let's stop talking about him. What about you? Like? What are things you can work on. Stop focusing on the mind, let's talk about you. So I got to the point. So I said you know what? Okay, you're right, it took a time. It took a while because I was so.

Speaker 1: 39:35

I believe that's when I really start, after the hope had passed of, okay, this can be better. I was getting to a point where I was just like I don't think, lord, I don't think that it can. That's when my mom was able to speak into me and she began to like sign me up for stuff to like present, you know, like, and I'm like cause she was like okay, you keep moving, you keep moving with God. And I was like you know why would you sign me up for this ladies day program? And I'm going through what I'm going through, but then I would have to study, and so if and I was taught what you teach, you gotta live. So I'm like, okay. I said, oh well, let me sweep around my own front door, cause I know there are some things that I can clean up, right.

Speaker 1: 40:31

And so I got to the point to where he would tell me oh, you're so ugly and I'm like you know what, maybe I could look better, so I would get a gym membership. I would get a gym membership and I will, I will begin to like I worked on myself. I actually became very healthy. He would tell me like you talk too much, you get so angry, you get mad. And I was like, well, do I do that? And then I would. And then I said, you know what I'm gonna work on me, you know what I'm gonna be better. So I, purposely, I took classes, I did all like. I was like, literally I took what he would say and I would say I'll flip it and I would look at myself and I'll say, okay, let me be better, let me work on this, this, this and this.

Speaker 1: 41:27

And I stopped focusing on him, which led me to go to law school or attempt to go to law school. And then he did another wrench and was just like I want, you know, we're gonna have a baby, this and that. And I was like no, no, no. And then got allowed it to happen and I was like wow, like why? You know, why would that happen? And I was. So I knew it was a boy. I knew it was a boy.

Speaker 1: 42:04

From the day that I found out, I felt that I was like life is in me. I felt it, loved it, like it was amazing, but I went through it right. So I didn't have the experiences of what other women had. I didn't, I had to take care of myself, but I got to a point where I had to go home. So I'm at home and I'm like okay, at any time that I showed happiness or care or joy, that was removed. Like he liked to control the temperament in the home and I did go.

Speaker 1: 42:49

I began to kind of go deep into depression and then like so people talk, people asked me so during this timeframe, you know, I'm like okay, now all the bills are on him because I went home and I purposely my mom said, don't do it. Which I look back and I'm like maybe I, maybe I shouldn't have. But what I didn't want was I'm gonna have this baby. He's not gonna work. I'm gonna have to take care of him and this baby. But so this is the thing with him, he would get me back.

Speaker 1: 43:29

So when I went home, so the car, the Jag that I have been paying for $600, $700 a month on because it it fell on me he took we like two, maybe two to three payments away from paying it off. He took my Jag and traded it in and came back with it. He didn't take his, he didn't take his Corvette, who is a two-seater. He took my car, traded it in and I and I'm looking at him rubbing my belly and I was like I'm not, I'm not gonna have my child, I'm not gonna have my child. So that's the stuff, like those are the things that he would do. So a person who has this type of personality disorder they hold, they'll hold it and then they'll get you back at a later date or a later time. So a lot of things that I were going, that I was going through, was because he was mad about something that I did previously and he was going to give me back.

Speaker 2: 44:34

We got to get you on another part. We're running out of time. We got to get you back on Like I, I and you're not sitting back. We like, oh man, like it's getting good. Your story is good, but we're going to wrap it up. Do you mind coming back to continue sharing your story? Yes, yes.

Speaker 1: 44:56

You have to get to the point if it gets wayward.

Speaker 2: 45:03

Stay tuned for more as we delve more into Elizabeth's powerful, god-given testimony. See you next week. That's it for now, but before we go, please continue to listen, subscribe, share our podcast. Also, if you want to support our show, please scroll down to the bottom of the show notes and click on the link that says buy me a coffee. We were greatly appreciated. Thank you for listening and remember God is good all the time, and all the time God is good and also Jesus Christ loves you. Thank you.