It's on you. No one can save you

If you want to change your life, it's on you to do that.
If you want to ditch that life of lethargy, it's on you to do that.
If you want to live a life that's lit, it's on you to do that.
Waiting for things to happen, isn't going to make them happen. And no one can truly save you but yourself!

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Transcript

Ryan Spence: 0:00

If you want to change your life, it's on you to do that. If you want to ditch that life of lethargy, it's on you to do that. If you want to live a life that's lit, it's on you to do that. waiting for things to happen, isn't going to make them happen.

Rafa: 0:22

You're listening to, The Triple C Project.

Ryan Spence: 0:31

Welcome to The Triple Project, the podcast that helps you, gain clarity, boost confidence, and build courage, so you can live life lit! I'm your host, Ryan Spence, the BigLaw dropout, life coach, author, speaker, lover of hoodies, hip hop, and big, hairy, audacious goals. If you're tired of living a life you don't want, and ready to start living the life you do want. This podcast will help you get from where you are to where you really wanna be, so now we're friends, I invite you to grab a drink, take a seat, and allow me to guide you towards living, a life that's lit! Welcome to Episode 12 of The Triple C Project. Flying through this episodes here. Some news this week, I booked a studio to So I posted a reel on Instagram this week, and it was posing a record the audiobook of my book, The Triple C Method, which is quite exciting. Because I only really got into audiobooks about a year, year and a half ago, I was always one of those book snobs who was like, I have to have a hardcopy book at a push or get in on the Kindle. So it was easy to travel with. But about a year and a half ago, I started to I thought, let me give audible audible another go. And I really started to enjoy it. And I loved it. And what it did for me actually was not only was I able to listen to more books get through more books. But I found that helped me to sort of discern the books that I wanted to buy, because there were some books which you can listen to in a highly entertaining, but you don't necessarily need to have a hard copy of. But for me, there were other books where I want to be getting that book I want to be writing on over it highlighting in places. And so listening to it on Audible first helps me make that decision. And the be a number of books where I've listened to it on Audible loved the book and immediately gone and ordered the hardcopy on Amazon or bought it from the store and gone through it again. So I can highlight and tab and you know, do all the all the geeky things that I like to do to kind of help me on my own personal development quest in my own personal development. Or just to help me get some additional ideas for things that I want to say or to look at things differently. So the audio book is coming. So those of you who have been asking the question of which there have been a few, there you go, it's coming. I'll be recording it in June, and hoping to get that out in July of this year. So watch this space. If you're not already follow me on Instagram at I am underscore Ryan Spence. Or perhaps the best thing to do is to get on the email list. Go to iamryanspence.com. And join the list and that way you'll be kept in the loop. And speaking of being on the littlest, you can just go and join. If you have a burning desire to get all the news as well. And trust me, it's a great I get an email out to you every week. But if you head to iamryanspence.com, you can actually download the confidence journal which will also get you on the list. The confidence journal is a great resource. I know I created it, but fuck being humble. It's a great resource. I know because people have told me and because I've used it myself. It's six journal journal prompts that I use when I want to get in the game when I want to level up my confidence to do things like launch this podcast or like write the book. You know, when you're giving yourself that negative self talk and you kind of really need to clear out that mind trash and get your mind clear and ready to face forward to create the vision of the life that you want to do the thing you really want to do. The confidence journal will help you do that iamryanspence.com. Click the button to get the free confidence journal that will also get you onto the lit list where you get the emails every week about things we talked about on the podcast about things that are coming up that week, and answering questions that people have sent to me in fundamental truth. And what I said was that once you accept the DMs or elsewhere just to kind of help you level up and this fundamental truth, it will set you free. And the truth that start to get you on the path towards living a life, that's lit!. Cool. That's the announcements for this week. Let's get to the episode. I stated was, no one's coming to save you. But I want to expand on that a little bit in this episode, and say that actually, no one can truly save you. But you it's all on You. If you want to change your life, it's on you to do that. If you want to ditch life of lethargy, it's on you to do that. If you want to live a life that's lit, it's on you to do that. waiting for things to happen, isn't going to make them happen. And I say that from experience. But let me go back a little bit. I want to use a story to help to illustrate this. So when I was a kid, probably about five or six, I think I was learning to swim with my dad in the local swimming pool. And I don't know I, I didn't love swimming. But it's it's a life skill, right? It's something that you need to be able to do. It could save your life one day. And I remember the usual process of being in the pool and my dad holding me and sort of telling me the technique. And then I remember distinctly I don't know why we remember these things from our childhood. But I remember distinctly him just sort of letting me go to do it on my own. And I was terrified. And I was flat, fluffing around and splashing and fearing that I was going to drown. And in the end he did he came and he kind of grabbed a hold of me, and he saved me. Now, when I say no one's coming to truly save you, you may be thinking, But your dad just saved you. So what are you talking about? But here's what I mean. In that situation, he helped me he stopped me from drowning. But he wasn't always going to be there. And if I hadn't taken proactive steps throughout the years to learn to swim, then when I found myself in similar situations in the future, I couldn't be certain that I would survive, I couldn't be certain that there would be people around to save me. And I would always find myself in these situations where I wasn't quite confident enough, I wasn't quite certainly enough of my ability to be able to get myself out of the water to get myself away from drowning. So I had to actually learn to swim. Because someone can save you in the moment someone who can save me in the moment, but they can't save me from everything. They can't save me forever. You need to learn. Just like I learned to swim, you need to learn the tools and strategies to save yourself to change your habits to get you on the path towards a life that slit towards living the life that it is that you want. Now the story. If you listen to this podcast or read the book, you'll know that I signed up for a boxing match and it was amazing and challenging and frightening in equal measure. But in starting to train for that fight, I knew that I needed to get to a point where I could Go through your rounds without getting knocked out without hurting myself without making fun of myself. Now, I could have just said that in my head and continued to go through the motions all the way up to fight night. But when I'm in the ring against my opponent, there's no one to save me. It's just me and the other fighter. So I had to take steps to help myself to get myself into a position where I had the tools, the strategies, the knowledge that I needed to be able to get in that ring, and do what it was that I needed to do. I hired a trainer, I followed the routines, I ate the right food, I quit alcohol, I did all of these things proactively to get me to the position that I needed to get to. I didn't wait for somebody to come and tell me what to do. I didn't wait for my trainer to say, You need to eat this and you need to not drink that you need to not do that. I had dialogue with them. I spoke to them. But I initiated those conversations. And I asked them the questions to get the answers that I needed to be able to do what it was that I needed to do. And finally, because you know, I like to do things in threes, just the third analogy, leaving big law. It was on me to do what I needed to do to escape the situation that I was in. My problem was that for around five years, I didn't really do anything apart from theorise and worry and allow negative thoughts and stories without any evidence to keep me where I was. But it wasn't until I took proactive steps to change my situation, that things started to change. It wasn't until I challenged myself to sign up for this boxing match that I shook myself out of the mental and physical funk that I was in. It wasn't until I went on the yoga retreat, and took that time out for myself to really reconnect with with who I was and start to ask myself the difficult questions that I started to gain some clarity as to who I was and where I wanted to be. It wasn't until I signed up for a yoga teacher training, that I figured out that that was what I wanted to do at that moment, in order to help people who had been in the situation that I had been in to not feel that way. It wasn't until I did the work. It wasn't until I took proactive steps to recognise where I was wasn't where I wanted to be. But then go the further step of taking action to actually do something to change that situation that things started to change. So this is what I mean when I say it's on you, when I say that no one is coming to save you. When I say that no one can truly save you. But you know, people can be around for you. And they can help you. But they can only do that if they know what's going on. And if you ask for help. And this is a another important point. Because when I say it's on you, I don't mean, you have to do everything yourself. I don't mean that you, as an individual have to forge this path alone. But what I mean is that you have to proactively go out and ask for help. You have to seek out help, you have to look for the resources that can help you, you have to find the books and actually read the books that are going to give you the information that you need. You have to listen to the speakers who are saying the things that resonate with you, and then act upon the things that they're saying that resonated with you. You have to implement the tools and the strategies that have been delivered to you. We can all sit around in our life of lethargy and wait for things to get better. We can wait for that recruiter to call with the perfect job. We can wait for our salary to increase so we can buy more stuff that we feel we need to buy to make us feel better about the life that we're living. We can wait for our lottery numbers to come up so we can give up the job and sail off into the sunset. This is all passive. And being passive isn't going to help you it isn't going to change your life. It isn't going to change it in the way that you want it to change. It isn't going to help you achieve the things that you want to achieve. So what I want to leave you with this week is just to say, it's on you. The familiar saying, nothing changes, if nothing changes, and it's true, you have to decide, this is where things change. This is where I no longer live the life that I'm living, because I don't want to be here. This isn't what I want. I want something more. You don't have to know what more looks like. But you have to decide that you want it. And then take steps to go and find out what that can be for you. You have to proactively take action, you have to do the work, you have to ask for help. You have to do whatever you feel you need to do in that moment to allow you to move from that life of lethargy, to a life that's lit! That's all for this week. If this episode resonated with you, and you're thinking, I do want more, I don't believe that I can do something else. But I really do want to see if that's possible. Go check out the book, The Triple C Method, gain clarity, boost confidence, build courage, so you can live life lit. It's available on Amazon, if you go back to, I should have this in front of me, but I don't but one of the earlier episodes, there is actually an episode where I read an extract from the introduction. So you can find out a bit more, what that's all about and how that lands for you. But the books' available now, paperback or ebook, so go ahead and check that out at Amazon or your local independent bookstore, wherever you get your books and start the process. Start the process of leaving that life of lethargy of leaving the life you don't want the life where you don't want to be. And start the process of getting towards the life you do want to be of getting towards the vision of the life you want of living a life that's lit! Thanks for tuning in to The Triple C Project. If you like the show, don't keep it to yourself. Go ahead, tell a friend and tell me too by leaving a review. To get more tips, tools, strategies to help you get from where you are to where you really want to be. Head to iamryanspence.com and download my free confidence journal. Don't forget to follow me on Instagram. I'm@iam_ryanspence. And you'll be the first to know about the release of my upcoming book to proceed. But for now, the only thing that I have left to say is, stop living a life of lethargy and start living life lit!