On Being a Highly Sensitive Man: Embracing your Gifts and Purpose with William Allen

In today's episode, I speak to William Allen about Highly Sensitive Men and his new course, On Being a Highly Sensitive Man. 

William Allen is the author of Confessions of a Sensitive Man and On Being a Sensitive Man. He leads the course with insights drawn from his extensive work as an advocate for HSP men. He is a certified hypnotist and brain training coach, author and advocate for HSP Men.  He believes that male sensitivity is not so rare, but it can be confounding for most males living in a culture of masculine insensitivity which teaches boys and men to disconnect from their feelings and emotions. As a highly sensitive individual himself, William combines personal experience, professional expertise, and engaging storytelling to create a transformative learning experience.  

Join the Waitlist (before March 17th) and take advantage of the early-bird discount: https://wwwhighlysensitivehumanscom.involve.me/hsp-man-course-waitlist

Join the course On Being a Highly Sensitive Man here: https://academy.highlysensitivehumans.com/courses/on-being-a-sensitive-man

Stay in touch with William Allen
 
Website:  www.thesensitiveman.com

Author of Confessions of a Sensitive Man, An Unconventional Defense of Sensitive Men

Transcript

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SPEAKER_01 0:02

I'm your host to be a name to the highly sensitive human podcast. The children offers an identified into the world of the highly sensitive person. It helps those who identify with the traits of high sensitivity. To feel more empowered and resilient without denying their authentic is. So welcome, Bill, and thank you so much for being on the podcast today. I'm really looking forward to this conversation and talking more about your new course and program and what it means to be a highly sensitive man. So welcome.

SPEAKER_00 0:50

Thanks, Joel. It's great to be back. And I hearkened back to one of the first podcasts I did, and you were that person, so I've always appreciated you and appreciated doing interviews with you. Thanks for having me.

SPEAKER_01 1:05

Yeah, you're welcome. It's great to have you back on the podcast. So it'd be great to start with you sharing a bit more about your story of being a highly sensitive man. So yeah, what's your story around that? How did you come across this term and get into this work?

SPEAKER_00 1:25

Well, it's like I've always said, I always knew there was something different about me. And of course, like most sensitive people, I often heard about, well, you're too sensitive, or you take things too seriously, or you think too deeply, you think too much. I knew there was something different about me, but it was a long time from that early childhood experiences and young adulthood experiences to the time that I found Dr. Elaine Aaron's book, Highly Sensitive Persons and or People. And um it was an eye-opener for me. I discovered that book probably in the early 2000s, um, and it was a recommendation by somebody else, and I picked it up, I read the book, and it it resonated with me, hit all cylinders, everything was me, I could see it. But because I had been conditioned in this culture of masculinity, that sensitivity was not a good thing for a man to be uh labeled with, that I kind of rejected the whole concept of sensitivity. The the attributes were very true to me, but the the but the concept of sensitivity was not. So I struggled with that for a long time, for about 10 years, in fact. And after that, I had retired from my corporate job, and I decided that I was going to start a blog. And that was kind of the genesis of my journey, serious journey, and being a highly sensitive man, embracing and educating myself about the trait. And so writing the blog over a course of several years led to consolidating some of those concepts into a book and then another book. Um, and the second book that I wrote uh on being a sensitive man is where I took those concepts that I had learned over the years and the research I'd done and put them into a more practical approach, a sort of applied sensitivity, if you will. And that's where the genesis of the class came from those that from that second book that I'd written. So I found myself now as an advocate, as somebody not only as an author, but a blogger, um, somebody who runs men's groups and things for highly sensitive men. So it's been a real interesting arc. And uh I think the most important thing is it's it's allowed me um to accept my sensitivity and my masculinity, the things that can live compatibly together. So that's kind of the journey that I've been on. Um, and I'm so glad that I've gotten to this point because it's really made a lot of peace in my life because I've been able to reconcile all these things that were uh unique because of my sensitivity.

SPEAKER_01 4:11

Yeah, thank you for sharing. And we will go on to talk more about the program in a moment on being a highly sensitive man. I was just wondering, because you started to touch upon it. I know a lot of men can really struggle with this word, sensitive and sensitivity. So, would you be able to give us a sort of definition of what it means to be a highly sensitive man? Because I think there's a lot of myths and misconceptions around, you know, what it actually means to be sensitive, but especially a sensitive man. So, yeah, what would you say for those who are not clear on what that really means?

SPEAKER_00 4:53

You know, it's a lot more than what I think most men who are new to this uh attribute to the trait. They go to their references through their own personal history, what they've heard. It's that highly sensitive people are overly emotional, they uh take things too seriously, um and they're weak, they're not strong, et cetera, et cetera. So they that has all been rolled up into this word sensitive that we've heard throughout the course of our lives. But the fact of the matter is, you know, that half of the sensitive people in the world, and we're talking, you know, numbers like two billion or so people, half of those people are highly sensitive men. It's not a subset of high sensitivity, it is exactly around half. So that's somewhere around a billion men uh that have this trait. So you're not alone if you label yourself as highly sensitive, but there's so much more to the trait than we give credit for. Things like being able to process information a very deep level, which is one of the attributes that Dr. Aaron has given to the characteristics of the trait, is this deep processing ability that gives us the capacity to see things, do, and and think about things and creatively come up with ideas that a lot of people can't do because of the nature of the way we process information. It also gives us this amazing capacity to be empathetic, um, gives us that caring side. Yes, we are emotional. Uh, yes, we do have uh a tendency to react to things in an emotional way, but that could be also something that could be very positive uh for us as well. We sense things at a very subtle level, right? And that is what I think pulling that information out and that feeds our deep processing, that allows us to gain insights through intuition and by processing, um, that makes us unique. Um, Dr. Earrett often talks about the evolutionary quality of the trade, which nobody thinks about because they're always hung up on the emotional stuff and and um and and sometimes the overwhelm that we experience. But that part, that evolutionary part, really adds purpose to being a highly sensitive person because at times when when we need to be focused on uh the world is focused on some of these superficial things, we're focused on things that might have impacts on the people around us or the world for that matter. So it becomes a trait that if once you get to a point where you've learned how to manage some of these things that seem to be challenges, you start to use this as a tool. And you start to see that we're a specialized type of human being that was designed by nature to be able to see these things and do these things that helps the species in general. And in fact, it's a natural thing. It's you know, hundreds of animal species have the same characteristics that are out there, so it is a natural thing. Um, I think that's the one thing they should really focus on is get past the fact that you've heard so many negative things about sensitivity in terms of emotional reaction stuff, weakness, you know, or if you're a man, labeling as a this is a feminine trait. This is some, it's a human trait, and uh embracing that. And I think that's a good way for highly sensitive men to start changing the narrative in their own head about high sensitivity.

SPEAKER_01 8:39

Yeah, amazing. I love what you're saying. I really support that because I also believe that the evolutionary aspect of being highly sensitive is so crucial and so important. And especially for men and for us to really step into our sensitivity, as you're saying, it's not something to be fixed or got rid of or reduced, which I know a lot of people are looking for that. They're looking for ways to reduce their sensitivity, but what you're saying is it's something that needs to be celebrated and um yeah, utilized, and also for highly sensitive men to really step into positions of leadership and and and yeah, take the lead in terms of our evolution as a collective. So I'm really excited to be talking to you because we have the course being released quite soon on being a highly sensitive man. And as you pointed out, the a lot of the material from that course has come from your books that you've written and your blog. And so, yeah, could you tell us a bit more about the course, you know, in terms of who is it for and and and why is this course so important?

SPEAKER_00 9:57

Well, I I think mainly because uh the number of books that are specifically targeted for highly sensitive men uh is very limited. There are some great books out there, people like Tom Falkenstein and Tracy Cooper and Ted Zeff's books, which were seminal works as far as high sensitivity and men are concerned. But there just isn't the broad sort of range of uh classes and um books that are available for highly sensitive men to start talking about. How do I manage this sensitivity thing and how do I manage it as a man? Which is, in my estimation, a little bit different because men have certain different expectations society places on us and so forth. So the class, the idea about the class is to walk through some key areas, and we can talk about those, uh, that are in the class that I think have relevance to highly sensitive men. They did to me, um, and I've I from feedback I've gotten on the book, it resonates with a lot of other highly sensitive men as well. And the one thing I want men to take away from this class is not that this class is going to give you all the answers to all your problems, et cetera, et cetera, but it's going to give you, I think, a good solid, strong background for you to start thinking about how do I take these concepts and customize them to my life. Okay. Being highly sensitive is just a part of who you are. You have a larger personality with lots of other elements that are involved in that. So, in taking something like a highly sensitive man class, you'll get some things that are specifically targeted for highly sensitive men, and also some things about other things that you could take and think about deeply about how that affects me. How can I go, you know, research and do things, uh, learn things on my own to help facilitate that. So I start off the with the first module, we talk about guiding principles. These are things, how to live the HSM way. How do you live your life the HSM way, which highly sensitive male way? And it starts off at a sort of a spiritual level, because I thought this is a good way to start, because so many highly sensitive people do have a strong bend bent toward uh spirituality without getting religious about it. And so one of the things that I was drawn to is Taoism. And Taoism is a philosophy, Eastern philosophical construct that is easily incorporated regardless of where you are spiritually. And again, the main things that come out of that that I think are important is two things that I think are important for highly sensitive people, and that's allowance and letting go of things. Um, so we talk about qi energy, we talk about some of those Taoist concepts like wu wei, what does that mean? Uh, which is the act of non-acting, um, and things like flow state. These are all important things for highly sensitive people. So I get into that kind of foundational stuff, which is way the way we lead off the class. Then I kind of go back to my uh psychology undergraduate days, and we move into a next, another module about hierarchy of needs, which is Maslow's famous uh pyramidal structure about what how to prioritize our needs and so forth. And so the idea there is that um uh I thought that was important. It was important to me back a long time ago when I was studying psychology, and I thought I can incorporate that in here. But we also modernize it a little bit with Scott Barry Kaufman's uh revisions of the hierarchy of needs and sort of kind of bring it up to date in a little bit different uh structure and so forth. So I think that's kind of important for laying out again foundations of what is important to you, what is important to you as a highly sensitive man and as an individual. Uh, we talk about the some of the other modules, we talk about setting boundaries, that's important, especially for highly sensitive people who very often are people pleasing too much and not not really managing uh to their own needs. And Jacqueline Strickland famously said uh in her gatherings is that it's about honoring your needs, not what people are desiring of you all the time, but to to think about what you need. So setting boundaries is a very important concept. Uh, we talk about comfort zone in another module. Uh, how do you deal with things that are uncomfortable for you? Uh, how about growth and understanding? And I propose it may not be entirely original, but this idea that comfort zone is not a static thing, it's it's like a membrane around you. Uh, and very often it scares people, high-sensitive people, to think about having to step out of what's comfortable for them. So the idea is reframe it a little bit and make it seem as though you can try in incremental fashion new experiences, but envelop those as they as you grow with that into your comfort zone. So you're expanding your comfort zone, not leaving it. You're growing new experiences and comfort with those new experiences so that you are more comfortable taking risks, you know. Um confidence, another thing highly sensitive men have an issue with. Uh, talk about some exercises and things you can do there. Dealing with change, dealing with strong emotions. Change is something that's going to happen in life, and you got to be able to deal with those changes and be constructive about them. Strong emotions, we talked about that earlier, that idea that learning to manage emotions. And I I want to just say this a lot of the elements in these modules are science-based and evidence-based. Um, it's material that I researched and is based on scientific research. So it's solid in that regard. So you're getting good information based on scientific studies and what's been learned in the field of psychology. So I try to keep it that way. There's a lot of things that are like the entire thing about Taoism, and that's not something they're going to have studies about. You do this, and this is going to get this result, but the idea that most of it is science-based. Um, and uh, you know, like I said, I try to keep it where the information we get is good. This is one thing about education, that's a module as well. Self-education, the importance of that. Once you start on this journey, it's very important to educate yourself with good information, right? Trusted sources, people who know what they're talking about, things that have are based in studies and science as well. So those are things that are really important to me is to make sure that the information I'm imparting is good and solid information that people can count on. Uh, do you mean to stop here for a second for a question or two, or do you mean to keep going?

SPEAKER_01 17:03

I love everything you're saying because there's so much rich content, and I've been through the content and the modules as well. Obviously, I'm not a man, but I as we're hosting it through the Highly Sensitive Human Academy, uh, I've had the privilege of seeing all of the content. And I think it's yeah, there's a really good balance between what you're saying in terms of the scientific theory and uh the scientific grounding, but also the practical component of it. And I was wondering, yeah, if you could speak a bit more to that, because you were describing how these are tools that people can actually implement into their lives that they can start to use right away. And I know there's a lot of reflective questions in the modules too. So, yeah, what would you say the practical implications are of this course and how it can actually transform people's lives?

SPEAKER_00 18:01

Well, the I well, the idea here is at the end of the day, I want them to be able to think about their sensitivity. In other words, being mindful about it. Uh, I think it's a first step in really learning about the trait and then assimilating that into your life. And, you know, there in fact is a module about right life for you. Um, I also talk about right livelihood, which is the right work, career, whatever. But right life is you can select the life that you live. Maybe you've never done that before before because you didn't understand your own traits, and you wound up putting yourself in places, work environments, or even in relationships that don't fit you or fit your personality. So, this is a hopefully a chance to for people to go through each one of these modules, you know, uh, take men particularly, go through these modules and look at and examine and be mindful of things like their values. What are my values? You know, this is something that you know you go to any therapist and at some point you're gonna hear this. What are your key values? You know, so you can measure up your life against those values. Are you being true? Are you being authentic to yourself? And the idea of going through this is to make them see, or help them see, I should say, that they can be mindful about all these elements. And those elements can be components of constructing that life as a highly sensitive man, you know, which is probably something they've never believed that could be done. And one of the things about the I think men particularly is we've been socialized, we've been uh taught over the years to suppress our feelings, uh, to suppress any sign of vulnerability, uh, to to you know, to sort of be very stoic about things. And at the end of this, I'm hoping, at the end of the class, I'm hoping that these individuals start to become very comfortable and start that journey of becoming open to the idea of being allowing more emotion to come forward, uh, uh allowing themselves to say, hey, look, I don't have all the answers. Uh, even as a man, I don't have all the answers as if somehow magically being a man gives you that ability. Um, but the idea is that they can start to assimilate the idea that you can be a man and you can be sensitive and nothing, you know, it gets lost in the process. Giving someone the tools to start examining that, helping them to see to be mindful of of all these elements that maybe they have suppressed or they've not looked at before, um, I think is sort of the out the ultimate outcome for the for the individuals taking the class, that it helps them get on this journey. You know, I've said this many times in blogs and in the books and everything else. The very first thing is to educate yourself. And if this is a first step for many of these men in the journey, I think it's important. There's a lot of material out there now. More research comes online all the time. To stay educated on top of this kind of stuff will help you gain confidence in your sensitivity as a man and also give you permission to be who you are. That's really the key thing. Uh, if you can walk away feeling that way, you'll be confident about who you are.

SPEAKER_01 21:37

Yeah, I'm really resonating. When you said that, I was just thinking about I have two older brothers who are definitely highly sensitive, and a father who is highly sensitive. And yet, I don't think they've ever had the privilege of having a course like this, which is so holistic and so integrative. And covers all of these different elements of what it means to be a highly sensitive man and talks about embracing it and accepting it and accepting yourself. It's so, like you said, it's so powerful, isn't it, to have that education to be able to really own who you are. So I can really feel, you know, the importance of this work, which is why, again, I was so honored when we when you came to me and we spoke about doing it through the academy, because I can just yeah, feel and see so many men in my life which really need this work. And I was remembering as you were talking that also on the course we have a lot of different guest speakers who are doing workshops. I was wondering if you could uh speak to maybe some of the speakers on the course. I know there's so many, not expecting you to list all of them, but yeah, we've got quite a lot of experts in the field as well.

SPEAKER_00 23:07

Absolutely. Each one of the modules has an expert attached to that module, and I asked the experts. The framework was I'm going to ask them three questions, and we wound up talking, and those questions lead to other questions and so forth. So I really get a lot of good information from them. Um we have people like Jacqueline Strickland, who is has been right from the very get-go when Elaine Aaron was moving forward with this community. Jacqueline was there and has been done gatherings for years and years and years. She's and she's considered an expert in personality uh testing and so forth. So I wanted to include her in one of the modules that was about knowing yourself better. Tracy Cooper, uh, again, another uh important figure, especially with highly sensitive men. He's written several great books about it. Uh, he has a focus on high sensation seeking. Uh, some of the men that will be taking this course may have that trait as well. Uh, and it may not be what you think it is. So, you know, it's a good thing to be able to uh tune in on that and find out what that high sensation seeking aspect is. You're on the class, and I enjoyed that. We talked about spirituality and transpersonal psychology and so forth with your module. Um, so I've got a nice collection of people. Um, some you may not know, but all these people are important people in the HSP community, uh, and they all have something unique and interesting. And they also have services that they provide as well that you might want to tap into to continue your educational process. But it I thought it really helped round out this because you weren't just getting my point of view on things. A lot of times these experts would give their obviously uh give their points of view on it or give their expertise on it, which I think added a great deal to the class. I think people are really going to enjoy that section.

SPEAKER_01 25:08

Yeah, absolutely. There's some fantastic speakers. And I know yourself, you got to speak to Dr. Elaine Aron herself a couple of weeks ago, and we will have some extracts from that interview, that conversation as well. I was just wondering, was there anything that really struck you about that conversation when talking to her about highly sensitive men? Because yeah, she is the uh the pioneer of this work, obviously.

SPEAKER_00 25:38

Yeah, she's she's at the pinnacle of the HSP community. Um what I found out that I didn't realize, uh, and although she was graciously been very supportive of the books that I've done and so forth, uh, has she has a special place in her heart for highly sensitive men. I think she gets and understands through her years of studies, research, and also um because of her therapeutic work, she understands that highly sensitive men do have these um uh challenges, you know, based on cultural expectations of what men are, and the fact that sensitivity has a lot of other connotations that don't necessarily culturally map out to uh what masculinity is. Uh, we had some great discussions in in that particular podcast that we did, and we are launching a podcast too for highly sensitive men called Men with Style, Randy Grasser and myself. Um so it was a great conversation. I and I couldn't get over how comfortable we all were talking to each other. Here uh to be able to talk to somebody who is the absolute pioneer, uh, the figurehead, if you will, of this whole community was such a great honor for me. Uh, but she was just down to earth, and we had some great conversation. I suggest that you uh tune into that at some point, and certainly you'll see some of that, the excerpts from that interview, um uh on the site here.

SPEAKER_01 27:09

Yeah, really exciting. We're all so grateful for Dr. Elaine Aren, obviously, and her work and her research. And I'll drop a link to your new podcast in the show notes as well for everyone to check out. When is that going to be released?

SPEAKER_00 27:27

Um, it will be that particular interview. Uh, the podcast will launch on April 1st, and that will be our first uh podcast. So it's sort of like kicking it off uh with a uh a big uh interview to start us off. I I think that the the name of the podcast is called Men with Style. That's an acronym. She will explain that, and I won't tell you what it is, but she'll explain that how she uses that acronym to describe highly sensitive men. So stay, you know, look out for that, and again, it'll be out on um around April 1st.

SPEAKER_01 28:04

Yeah, fantastic. So just a couple of weeks before On Being a Highly Sensitive Man will be released through the Academy. And I know one thing a lot of men are looking for is community. And so I was wondering, could you just share a little bit about your men's groups and how you know people who are searching for connection with other highly sensitive men, you know, can find that and how that can uh tie into taking the course as well.

SPEAKER_00 28:35

Absolutely. Um the men's group was uh started a couple of years ago. It was just a few people who had reached out to me after reading the book, and we started getting together and talking, and it was so enjoyable, so much uh fun, and a lot of great information was going back and forth that I kept trying to expand it. And as more men would reach out to me, I'd say, Well, look, we have a men's group. It's now at a point where we have about 150, 140 uh men that are uh subscribers to the men's group. Uh, we do have a what I call a big tent meeting, which is you don't have to pay, it's there's no paywall or anything to get to it. Um, it's a chance for you to get in and sample it and see how it is to meet with other highly sensitive men. One of the things, Jules, I think is really important, I've heard this over and over again, is highly sensitive men really do want a community of other highly sensitive men. It's kind of like a validation test, right? I feel this way, but I don't want I don't know if other men that are highly sensitive feel this way and whatever. And so they're trying to get some validation by talking with other men. And what happens is they get real excited about it because maybe for the first time in their life they can be open about their sensitivity with other men and can talk about issues that are important to them. And so community is a big, big thing for highly sensitive men. We're trying to build that. I would love to see more of these things stood up around the world. This is an international group. We do have people from all over the world who come. Um, but it would be nice to see this grow in into locations regionally. We do have pod groups that are smaller that focus on a set group of people who meet regularly. Uh, those are available too. Uh, we're working on kind of restructuring those right now, but that's still going to be something that's going to be a key element, and there'll be more information on that later. Uh, but the main thing is to be able to get together with other men who share this trait, and you start to realize you're not alone. Uh, there are other people like you, and they're out there, and it's interesting to see the interaction between these men.

SPEAKER_01 30:53

Yeah, fantastic. And I was just wondering, because from experience, I know it can be quite daunting to sign up to a new course or join a new community, uh, especially when you are highly sensitive. That sense of starting something new can feel yeah, challenging. What would you say to anyone who might be feeling some doubts or insecurities about embarking on this journey of taking the course or maybe joining one of your men's groups? Yeah, what would you say if they have doubts?

SPEAKER_00 31:30

I would say take it one step at a time. Now, one of the things that I I've learned, especially from Jacqueline Strickland, when she does her HSP gatherings, is that there's no requirements. This isn't like most of the seminars or webinars you've met before, but especially, I'm sure this is true for a lot of other highly sensitive groups that meet together too. The expectation is if you have something you want to say, you can say it. If you don't, it's okay. You can be just like the rest of us. Many of us are introverts and maybe have a little difficulty uh speaking up in groups and stuff like that. You can sit back and observe. There's no pressure, we don't make demands on people or push you into a place where you're not feeling comfortable. Uh, it does take a little time. Uh, we've had some people in the group that have been going for a long time that just like to sit and listen, and that's perfectly okay. Um, so it's not the stressful type of thing you might see if you're joining another group that is mixed with people who are not highly sensitive, maybe a lot of extroverted people who kind of demand you do like they do. It's a different group. Meeting with highly sensitive people is a uniquely uh, I think it's a wonderful experience. What you'll find almost immediately with a lot of highly sensitive people is you have an instant rapport. You you don't have to go through a whole bunch of uh kind of gesturing and and things like that to get to know somebody. They're very open and you can feel that. So I would encourage them uh if they're interested to try it. That's what the big tent meetings are for. Give you a chance to try it out, see if it's for you. It may not be, but if it is, you'll know and you'll be in an audience of people who will accept you immediately. So you don't have to worry about whether or not you have to pretend to be something that you're not. Same thing with the class, I think it's just one of those kind of things where to get to know yourself a little better, you need some footing somehow. And I think that taking a class like the class that we're gonna have on your your uh um uh academy site is a good launch point to get to get people assimilated. Uh and your your education is gonna go on the rest of your life, and as long as you keep that in the back of your head, then you can see that for what it is, it's a good point to start your journey and kind of get you going down the road with that.

SPEAKER_01 34:03

Yes, education is power, isn't it? So it is you can't go wrong with more knowledge, and especially going back to what you were saying earlier, that unfortunately I find now on social media there's so much information being shared which isn't actually accurate or hasn't been researched or validated. And so it really struck me what you were saying before that this is all based on science as well, it's all based on research. And so, to really help people dispel those mess around this topic, I think it's really important to check the source of the information and who you are learning from as well. Um, but as you were talking, I I noticed my body just relaxing because you know what you were saying about there being no pressure. I've also experienced that in groups with highly sensitive people. And on our retreat that we do in the UK for HSPs, uh, we have a men's group and a women's group, and a lot of people come into the retreat and go into those groups with a lot of anxiety, feeling that it's not okay to be who they are, and they walk away, always sharing that for the first time in their life, they felt validated, they felt seen, they felt understood, they felt they could just be their authentic self. And so that's really what you were describing. I think it doesn't matter if it's online, in person, on the course, or yeah, just being around highly sensitive people who you can relate to is in itself life-changing.

SPEAKER_00 35:44

Yeah, and I I again I think you're absolutely right about that. Being around people who understand you, uh almost out of the gate, um I think sets up that kind of relaxation, that kind of being at ease, and really opens the door for you to be who you really are. For a lot of people, uh, they don't do that very often, if they do it at all. They live a life where they're being inauthentic because they think there's something wrong with themselves. Um and when you're around other people, and when you start educating yourself, you start to realize this is not a disorder, this is not something you should be ashamed of, and especially for men to be ashamed because they are sensitive, um, has started this sort of snowball effect where they feel like they can't be sensitive and be a man at the same time. And that's that's one of the things I hope we can dispel with classes like the one we're going to be putting out there, and then getting in communities of men who can talk to each other about this, and they realize I'm okay as a sensitive man.

SPEAKER_01 36:53

Absolutely, and more than okay, as we were saying earlier, needed a valuable member of society and having a particular purpose in life as well. I think for me, that's something as a highly sensitive person, I feel so drawn towards finding my unique purpose, my reason for being here. And I feel what you talk about on the course is so much about that, isn't it? Finding that purpose, that meaning, that sense of embracing your unique uh expression of being highly sensitive. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 37:29

Yeah. That uh reminds me, when you're thinking about that, there's a part of the course where we talk about this Japanese concept of Ikigai, which is the idea of it's been a little corrupted from the Japanese, but I think the Western adaptation really basically goes back to what you're saying. Finding your purpose. What is what is my purpose in life? And I think that is a key question that a lot of highly sensitive people mull over all the time. Uh, what's the meaning for my life? What is my purpose in in being here? Uh, and those kind of elements are very important to us. So that's part of the whole process of accepting who you are as being able to do those kind of things, uh, exercises. And high-sensitive people are drawn to this kind of stuff. I mean, it's not like people force us to figure this stuff out, but it's nice to have a roadmap in order to get to that place.

SPEAKER_01 38:23

Yes, absolutely. And so is there anything else about the course that you want to mention? I'm wondering also how can people go ahead and take action if they are interested in joining the course and want to find out more?

SPEAKER_00 38:40

Well, certainly. Um, on my website now there's a um a tab that's devoted to classes, which is this is the only one I have on there. It has links to where you can register, pre-register for the class. Now, by the time this comes out, I don't know, the class will probably be up. So it'd be a good place to come in and register for the class there. Um, you can go to your website, you can get them, they know what that is, and and be able to find it is there as well. And I really do appreciate you, uh, Jules, for allowing me to co-brand this with you and to cut for you to host this. Um, is I feel like it's a great place for it to be and for um uh a great launching pad for this particular class. So I'm very grateful for you for doing that.

SPEAKER_01 39:30

Yeah, and it's really a pleasure. I honestly don't know anything else out there that exists like this. When you told me about it, I was really yeah, amazed because I thought there's nothing out there. Yeah, there are books, there are classes, there are podcasts. Well, I maybe your podcast is the only one actually that you're about to launch. I'm not really sure of any other ones for men.

SPEAKER_00 39:57

Um, so yeah, this course is so unique, and I really hope it can empower a lot of highly sensitive men and yeah, you know, one of the things that we see a lot, and and you probably have noticed it too, um, because you work with highly sensitive people, is the participation rates of highly sensitive men, and particularly in the community itself, whether it's a beat-up group or whether it's an online function or even buying books and reading, is not as great as I think it could be. And so reaching out and trying to get these men to start embracing this trait starts with those educational elements that are that are that we're starting to build now. And I think that's really important. Um, I think highly sensitive men too feel like they're kind of an one-off, odd uh entity within the highly sensitive community because, again, they have cultural expectations that that sort of conflict with what their sensitivity is. A lot of other stuff, past traumas and things like that, might prevent them from wanting to embrace this. So it's so wonderful that you're you're, like I said, co-hosting this and getting it out there in a very visible way so that men can start starting to see that um, you know, uh it's it's it's not a bad thing to be sensitive, um, and give them some power um to embrace that.

SPEAKER_01 41:23

Yeah, absolutely. And so I will put all of the links uh in the show notes for people to access. And I think one more thing to mention is we currently are offering an early bird discount. So if you register before the end of April, you'll receive a 20% discount on the course. So I just wanted to mention that because it is a new course and we really yeah want as many people to benefit from it as possible. So if you get in there early, you will receive a discount as well.

SPEAKER_00 41:57

Absolutely.

SPEAKER_01 42:00

So is there anything else you wanted to mention just before we close? Any last thoughts? Closing statements?

SPEAKER_00 42:08

I would just say to all the highly sensitive men out there that are on the fence about this is that um take a step forward, take a step out there. Uh, I know it's hard, I know it is, because I am a highly sensitive man and had to make that very same step myself. But once you do, it will be so liberating for you to be able to be who you are and be proud of who you are. And uh that to me, I think uh will will enhance your life and and make it really uh a lot more fulfilling for you.

SPEAKER_01 42:44

So yeah, thank you so much. Thank you for your words. I can really feel that resonance from what you're saying. So thanks again, Bill. It's been a pleasure talking to you and yeah, look forward to more conversations very soon.

SPEAKER_00 43:01

Thank you, Jules. As always, it's great to be talking to you again.

SPEAKER_01 43:05

Thanks for joining me today on Highly Sensitive Humans. Make sure to visit my website, highly sensitivehumans.com, where I also offer one-to-one coaching for highly sensitive people and a members area with monthly community meetings. You can also visit the Highly Sensitive Human Academy to find out more about upcoming online trainings, including a three-month professional training on how to coach highly sensitive people, and a three-month professional training on working with highly sensitive children. And if you found value in the show today, I'd really appreciate your rating. And you can also support the show by making a donation. Your donations are what enable the production of the podcast and enable the show to keep running.