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Scientology Outside of the Church Podcast
SE11EP29 - Independent Scientology and Reciprocity
The fundamental principle of reciprocity governs everything from our physical bodies to our most intimate relationships. When blood flows through your heart or air fills your lungs, a constant cycle of give and take sustains life itself. But what happens when relationships lack this essential balance?
This thought-provoking conversation explores how balanced exchange creates thriving connections while one-sided giving leads to dysfunction. "I want to be kind, but I don't want to die," becomes a powerful reminder that generosity without boundaries isn't sustainable. We examine why "random acts of kindness" might actually be problematic and how structured, intentional giving creates more meaningful outcomes.
The discussion takes fascinating turns through practical examples—from teaching children fair exchange with simple trades like "a flower for candy," to recognizing when someone is manipulating your kindness through guilt or obligation. We explore how people operating at different emotional tone levels approach exchange differently, and why connecting with those at or above your level becomes crucial for your well-being.
Most importantly, we discover that reciprocity isn't just about preventing exploitation—it's about creating relationships where both parties strive to outgive each other in healthy competition. These positive-sum exchanges generate an upward spiral where everyone benefits exponentially. Whether in business partnerships, friendships, or family dynamics, balanced reciprocity becomes the foundation for relationships that don't just survive but truly thrive.
What standards have you set for exchange in your relationships? Are you surrounded by parasites or partners? Listen now to transform how you approach giving and receiving in every area of your life.
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all right, welcome to installment number three of the week of september. Today is sunday, september 7th 2025, and this is season 11, episode 29. Um, this is the third installment. I'm here with quentin and arthur and we're going to do this is a really hot mic. We're just talking about this. We're going to do sort of like an extension episode.
Speaker 1:This has to do with exchange, lrh's degrees of exchange. We're looking at it from the viewpoint of reciprocity and this is a very, very key thing for people and I want to define what reciprocity is, and it's a term LRH uses a lot and reciprocity is a noun and it's defined as these three definitions the practice of exchanging things with others for mutual benefit, a situation or relationship in which two parties grant each other equivalent privileges, rights or services. Number three in general usage, it refers to mutual dependence, give and take or balanced exchange in social, economic or legal contexts. Now, the derivation of this, the etymology, is from Latin reciprocis quote, turning back. The same way, unquote, which came into medieval Latin as reciprocitis, meaning quote, the quality of returning in kind, unquote. So that is reciprocity.
Speaker 1:And or reciprocation where there is a, a mutual benefit, and this is something I mean. There's been a lot of this going on, uh, for me here in south africa, uh, and we can get into that, but um quentin was hot to uh get started so that we didn't lose the. You know the magic of what we were talking about. So for sure, I'll let you, I'll let you lead on this, since you had some things that you wanted to say, and then I'm sure we'll this'll go a bunch of different directions really quickly.
Speaker 2:Sure, well, you know. First of all, I want to say that reciprocity in any flows, any of your flows, is going to be extremely necessary in order for anything to work. Whether it be your heart pumping blood, right, the blood goes out, the blood comes in, the blood goes out, the blood comes in. That keeps your life functions operating, whether it be inhaling and exhaling out and in, out and in and exhaling, you know, out and in, out and out in. And so in every functional living system, reciprocity or the what is it? What's the definition? Say, the turning and coming back in, or to turn back in, or turning back the same way, turning back the same way. So I go breathe out and I breathe in. You know, I like like. It has to happen, it has to be the case.
Speaker 2:And when, in any living functional situation, when there is not reciprocity, when there is not two-way communication, when there is not a fair exchange, you're going to have dysfunction, you're going to have a cancerous or parasitic type relationship or situation, and this thing can be extremely dangerous to your life. And we're talking to very vague in general, but I'm gonna give some specifics as I go along, because I want people to understand that, when it comes to reciprocity, it is a necessity, not an allowance. I'm not allowing, I'm not tolerating this lack of reciprocity. In my experience, there has to be fair exchange or else already I can see you nodding and it's and it's interesting going through the proteas course as well.
Speaker 3:um, lrh points out that if, if the communication flow is only going one way, whether it's out or whether it's in, it's going to cause aberration, and it's interesting how you just put it. Then, quinton as well, it's got to be a full comm cycle, it's got to go two ways, which goes back to the derivative backwards and forwards, moving forwards and moving backwards, moving forwards and moving backwards. So it's quite a mechanical approach in a way as well, in a sense, but then also spiritually too.
Speaker 1:yeah, that was really well said, quentin, yeah yeah, for sure, yeah, that's, and that's. That's the thing is, is it has to be a balanced flow.
Speaker 2:I think that, yeah, I think that, ultimately, when people get into relationships or people have these experiences in life, sometimes the emotions can preclude what it is that we're really doing. Here. We're surviving, right. The principle of existence per LRH is survival, and we're all trying to survive and or thrive in our own experiences, and that goes from the parasite. The parasite is trying to survive, the bacteria is trying to survive just as much as I am. But you're not just going to keep taking from me. Right, I'm going to, I'm going to have to eliminate that which is not adding to my survival, and I'm very clear about that. You know, I just think that people have this idea that because I feel something, it makes survival less valuable. I don't know what. I don't know what. I don't know what that I don't know what it is.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and and when? When you let's put it this way when a person cares to the nth degree, that is when you see others take who are not in the position that you are in. So, if you're kind and you have a and I'm I'm using non-scientological terms on this when you are kind, others will take advantage of you. When you have, you have given and, like we said, this has to do with the I've given and, like we said, this has to do with the others have to.
Speaker 1:I kind of lost my train of thought here because I'm thinking faster than I can talk. They will take advantage of you because they see that you are generous and you are kind, and because you are kind, you will keep letting them do that because you can't say no. And we talked about one of the podcasts, the no drill, where you don't want to say no because, well, you don't want to offend, you don't want to hurt, you don't this, you don't that, and so you have to put your foot down and say okay, what is it that you bring to the table? I've had many instances of this this week alone. Go ahead, quinn.
Speaker 2:Sure, sure, that's a yeah. What is it that you bring to the table? I don't want to die. I want to be kind, but I don't want to die. I don't want to die. I want to be kind, but I don't want to die. I don't want to atrophy, I don't want to lessen in my functionality and who I am as a functional being and so sure. I don't want to be unkind, and I don't think that that is the other side of the coin. I just think that when things are going a certain way, what we want to do is we want to bring order, and we talked about this in the last podcast when we talked about word clearing and stuff. We want to bring order to it.
Speaker 2:One of the ugliest phrases, one of the ugliest phrases I've heard in a long time is random acts of kindness. Have you heard that phrase? Random acts of kindness? It's so ugly to me because in what universe do we want to tolerate massive randomness or randomity? No, we don't want. We want some balance to it, and so I'm a very kind person, but I'm kind in order. I'm kind with order, I'm kind with fair exchange. I told my son this my son would come to me and he'll be like oh dad, can you buy me these shoes? Oh dad, can you give me these games? Oh dad, can you give me da-da-da-da? And I told him this. I said I will never tell you. No, I will always ask you how. So if you say, dad, can you buy me shoes, my question is how you gonna get them. I can buy them, sure. How you gonna get them. I, I can buy you shoes. How you go, how you gonna get them if I buy, if I buy they, my shoes, how you getting them?
Speaker 2:right that's my first question.
Speaker 3:I think. Also when it comes to kindness, though, I think sometimes we fall into the trap of having an expected result as well, as opposed to being able to see reciprocity versus having an expectation that reciprocity will be met if you do something, having an expectation that reciprocity will be met if you do something, hence the random acts of kindness. People may believe that, okay, if I do something good, then something good will come back to me, but it's, it's an open-ended kind of thing. It's not, um, it's not a, it's not definitely created, it's. It's not a definite reciprocity, it's a reciprocity with a question mark attached to it.
Speaker 3:Something may happen in return, something may come back in return, as opposed to actually making the reciprocity occur and setting yourself up for proper rest. And I've fallen into this trap many times where I felt if I did something for someone, then they will do something for me, and then, after a while, then you fall into the tip of hang on I've been doing this, this, this, this and this, but all I'm getting is peanuts in return. Now, whose fault is that, mine or the other?
Speaker 2:person's. Here's a Q-ism. Here's one of my Q-isms. Random reciprocity is a recipe for disaster.
Speaker 3:Yes, Another saying expectations equal premeditated resentment, because you do fall into a sense of resentment. Yes, you know what I mean.
Speaker 2:Right, and another one is the road to success. Is the road to success with good intentions Right?
Speaker 1:Right so.
Speaker 2:I think that I think that we are, we're, we're, we're kind of building this idea that, as independent Scientologists, we understand a good communication cycle, we understand good control Start, change, stop. We understand that anything that is out of control is a cancer, anything that's out of control is an accident, is hazardous to our health, to our well-being, to our relationships, to our finances, to our life, and so there has to be some good control put in, start, change and stop in order to make things actually exist well and I just think that that's true, yeah and to make it a complete cycle.
Speaker 1:You've got to be the cause and effect to some degree yeah, yeah and and see, there's a rose, there's, there's pre-recipro, and that is what you guys just mentioned is communication. Do you have agreement? If you can't get that agreement, then you're already setting yourself up for it being a negative sum exchange for something that you're doing. I'll give you an example of where that is not the case. Uh, that that happened this week. Uh, we had uh two uh workers that worked our residence and both of them became unemployed when I moved and this is this was, you know, several weeks ago and the gardener got fired by the landlord because I gave the gardener a freezer, a storage freezer in the garage, and I said you can have this. He wanted to buy it from me. It was too much and I thought I'm not using it, I'll just go ahead and give it to him. But the landlord fired him because he wanted the freezer instead.
Speaker 1:Now, the gardener did get it, he did get the freezer, but he lost his job. I can't make this sort of thing up. And he had been employed with this this homeowner who we were renting from for six years and has a newborn baby and a wife that he's trying to support. So I took, took him to the grocery store and I got him some groceries because he was really low on his groceries. Now the reciprocity there I didn't expect anything in return. It wasn't very much, I mean, you know, in US dollars, because money for food here goes a long way and the reciprocity for me was make sure you feed your baby. The reciprocity for me was make sure you feed your baby, make sure you feed your wife, and the same thing held true for the domestic or the maid that we had when I moved. She was no longer employed and I gave her a full month's salary, with her only working two weeks. But things came up and she was out of money for food. So we took her out and got her groceries and both of these people thanked us their husband, her husband thanked, uh, you know, gave an acknowledgement for the groceries and everything. And, um, the gardener, after he got home, rode his bike home with the groceries, sent a message and wanted to know how thankful he was and how much he appreciated the support and the reciprocity there was.
Speaker 1:If, if, can, I should, and that's the exchange. That's all I ask for is because if you're taking KRC for something and you know that you can help in what were dire situations for both of these individuals. That's the exchange is okay. This helps you out. Go forth and find a new job, type of a thing. So to me that's okay. If you're okay doing that and it isn't that much money, go ahead. Quentin, I know I see you want to say something.
Speaker 2:No, and I think that that's amazing, and I think that that view confidently is what we need to help make the world a better place. To a certain extent, I am of thecity that is present Right. So for me and no invalidation to what you did I think it's amazing. For me, my first thing would have been when can you do X? When can you do Y do X, when can you do Y? Right? So I know you need, I know you need groceries today and I have no problem getting you groceries because that's obviously a very dire and urgent thing. We'll get the groceries today. Can you come over on Saturday and do the laundry, or can you come over on on on on Sunday and, you know, trim the trees, if that's what you need, or whatever it may be. Can you help me get some stuff out of storage when I get ready to move some stuff in my storage unit or whatever, wherever that becomes an agreement. We have a new thing that we're creating here and it's a functional relationship. It's a relationship that's based on something that's gonna work for both of us. So I definitely agree that helping people when they need help is there. That does not take away that there is an underlying truth that we all live by, and we're here to help each other. We're here to help each other and that's where we, I think, can gain the most value.
Speaker 2:Lrh says in the marriage course he talks about, when you take responsibilities away from the other person, you make them more and more criminal right. When you take the responsibilities away from the other person and that goes with relationships and partners, that goes in business relationships and that goes in families when the responsibility is no longer on the child to clean their room, for example the child becomes criminal right and then they start acting more and more like a criminal right Takey, takey, takey, takey, takey. But when you give the child responsibilities, when you give them things that they have to do in order to get to what they want, get where they where they want, they become more responsible.
Speaker 1:Right Arthur.
Speaker 3:I think you have to be careful on how you do things. In a sense of people like I have no issue doing good things, but I've also learned that if I'm going to do something good, it's because I've chosen to do it full stop. I have no expectation of something in return. I have no expectation of anything like that. I have no expectation of something in return. I have no expectation of anything like that. But then there are times where I'm creating like a contract in a sense, where you know, okay, I will do something for something in return. And I think it's really important to be clear on where you sit in that kind of thing, because, like, if you're going to do something and then expect something to happen or to come back to you, then you've already failed, and so I think it's it's really important.
Speaker 3:If you're going to do a random act of kindness, so to speak, it remains a random act of kindness. That's it do it and then forget about it. You know, don't do it and then, and then think that, um, it's okay, you need to have something in return. Um, and I think it's. You've got to be quite clear on how you approach things, in the sense of I'm actually doing something because I want something in return. Make that clear, communicate it, create a deal, that kind of thing. If you're going to do something for the because you just want to, then it stays there that time in your past. You know. It's not something you go forward saying, well, I did this and I did that. So therefore you know I want something in return because then you didn't do a good act.
Speaker 1:Ultimately, um, you did something with an intention and a preconceived future reward yeah, that pay it forward kind of thing you know is, you know, do this for somebody else when you're in a position to do that, and and I think that those and I actually don't think there's anything wrong with those things.
Speaker 3:I think they they're beautiful things to do, and I think, but at the same time, you know, in some cases it's like asking a lion to become a vegetarian. You know, you've got to really be careful where things. You know what I mean, because there are a lot of lions out there and there are a lot of um cheats. I suppose I don't know what the robots to use are, um, but people ever their own survival needs, whatever they are, and as far as survival goes, people will do the most heinous things, um, to survive, you know, and in such situations even eat other humans if they have to, you know, and that's an extreme level. But then what about a lesser level, where somebody's trying to pay their rent, somebody's trying to pay their phone bill, somebody's trying to put food on the table? You know, everybody's a monkey in the lion's, yeah and yeah, I think your mic's yeah, you're muted oh go
Speaker 1:ahead, jonathan. Well, I I was. I was just going to say that where, where we started off this and we're on a little bit of a side rail was this that it needs to be communicated what? What is it that you're doing? And quentin said you know, okay, well, this is this is this is this is the agreement, this is what we're we're going to do, and and if, if you don't do that, then you're setting yourself up for something because it wasn't put out there and we've had this in other podcasts.
Speaker 1:You know, get it in writing that I'm doing this and you're going to do that, because, and if you and when in writing could could be, it could be audio recorded, it could be video recorded with audio, or it could be right text message or whatever. These are, these are my uh grounds for this and what we're agreeing to. But you also have to know who it is that you're dealing with, whether they're mature enough, whether they're responsible enough. You know those. Those are qualifying factors, and if you, if you don't do that and you're dealing with somebody who isn't those things, you're going to end up at the thin end of the wedge and be under pressure because it's going to be expected.
Speaker 2:For sure. You know, I, my son's, my son's sisters, they're twins and when they were like three or four and you know, a three or four year old can't do much in life, you know what I mean. They just kind of walk around and be cuter, be messy or whatever they do Right. And my son, the sisters, would come up to me, the twins, and they would want something. I would have some candy or I have something, or whatever. And they would say, oh, can I have a piece? And I would say, well, let me ask your mother. So I asked mom, you know, hey, is it okay if the girls have a piece of candy? And she would say yes, and I would.
Speaker 2:My next statement to the twins three years old, four years old, is and what do I get? I is, and what do I get? I do like this what do I get to a three or four-year-old? And they were like I don't know. I said, go find me something. Ooh, get me a flower, I want a flower. And they would run around the house, run around the house when I saw it and grab a flower, and they would come back and bring me a flower and they would get candy. I do this in everything. I do this in everything. You don't get candy until I get a flower Right, because at that maturity level they could find flowers Right.
Speaker 2:Right or rock or whatever, exactly, exactly, and so you give them. Obviously you have to assess. As an intelligent person, you would want to assess what the situation is going to grant the opportunity it grants them, but you find something that they give. And, because I say this all the time, what's good for the goose has to be good for the gander. It can't just be about you boo, it can't Right. And so whatever you get, it has to benefit all of us somehow.
Speaker 2:So if you get some new shoes or if you get a new game I'm talking thinking about my son if you get some shoes or you get a new game, then how is that going to benefit me? What I'm gonna do with it, right? So then? So now it has to be something that I need and want. You know what? That pantry, the kitchen, the pantry in the kitchen, has been in disarray for months. Go ahead and hook that up real quick. I got you and he was like man. I said listen. You said man, like I'm doing you wrong, I'm getting you a game, right, and he would come back and he would finally get it done after complaining, you know, whatever, whatever, but yeah, and he would come back and he would finally get it done after complaining.
Speaker 3:You know, whatever, whatever. But yeah, yeah, and it's true, because, like, even for you to be at the point to just buy shoes, as an example, you know you've already reciprocated your role to have the ability to be able to purchase those things. And then, if you're just going to give that away, then where's the reciprocity there? And I suppose, thinking about it while we're discussing it, reciprocity occurs in so many different ways an exchange of money through work, exchange of service, services and money, like they're all you know. It's a form of reciprocity. You don't go to the supermarket and just grab whatever you want off the shelf and walk out. You've got to exchange what, what you've already created through some kind of reciprocity. You know, providing a person service and then to to just give it away, then that's, that's the danger zone, depending on how you give it away. But I like your idea it diminishes you.
Speaker 2:It diminishes you and it diminishes you in the eye of the receiver, because now you are less your work, your, your life, blood, your energy, your blood, sweat and tears.
Speaker 1:You're burning the midnight oil that becomes less valuable because all I have to do is say I need shoes right and and this is this is one of the things that I wanted to bring up in this, in this podcast is because you'll get those individuals who will reduce you and if you go into that agreement of that reduction of who you are, what you are, what you do, so that they can then benefit off of you having to quote, unquote, make up the damages that are persistent, only because that is the viewpoint that they are trying to get you to agree to, that reduces your own self-worth and you feel like, well, I need to propitiate, I need to do some things for you. You see this all the time, with beings who are using your kindness, your high-toneness, against you, because you will take on this guilt for what it is that you supposedly have done and you agree to it. So you're oh, I'm sorry, let me, let me do this and let me do this and let me do this, and it's like you're already a parent, you're already a son, you're already a daughter. Whatever the situation, you're already a business partner.
Speaker 1:In some situations where, if you know that you're doing everything that you can do, you need to, power is the ability to hold a position in space. Per lrh, and it's true. Why is it that you're believing this stuff that you're being told, so that there is an unfair reciprocation, whether it be money, power, goods, services, whatever it is. You don't have to believe that sort of thing and you need to be very on point to see that if it occurs, because you see it a lot.
Speaker 2:Well, yeah, because it. Oh, good, no, that's right. Good, I was going to say Right, and I totally agree, because it then falls into the province of manipulation. Right, because the less I, the more you give me, the less valuable I see you. Right, and this happens across the board, this happens in welfare states, this happens in every arena. The more you give me, the less valuable I see you. And then I have to continue to diminish you to make you want to give me more.
Speaker 2:Right To, to, to make up, make up for the loss. Like you know, I, you were at a hundred, and then you gave, gave, gave, gave, gave, and now you at 85. And it's like God, you, only, you can only do 85%. Now you can only give me, you know, $85 versus a hundred dollars. Man, what's wrong with you? What's going on, man? Are you all right, you know? And he started making you think that maybe something's wrong. And so now you got to give another $50 to try to make up the fact that I can only give $85. It's like no, listen, let me tell you something. I tell my best friend, my best friend, if you got to go to the hospital, you can absolutely call me, but at the end of it, I'm a BL2. And so make sure you got some gas money when I come pick you up. We'll be on the way, but make sure you got some gas money because I'm coming.
Speaker 1:Yeah, well, you know the term of the word acquiesce is probably a little, acquiesce is probably a little, I don't know. It has a little bit more leeway and margin than agreement. You can acquiesce and acquiesce and acquiesce and it goes from 100 to 85 to 70 to 50 to 40 to 20, because you made the mistake of acquiescing in the first place and so you're giving ground when you acquiesce and acquiesce, by the way me, means to silently and or passively accept or agree or comply when someone protests right so so you silently or passively agree or comply with.
Speaker 2:Someone is protesting okay, all right, I'll do it. Okay, let me see what I can do. Oh, you know, I get it. I know how bad things are right now, let me give right, right, and then you're done for.
Speaker 1:Okay, because I got this. Now, if I push this button and in Scientology you know you have buttons, buttons of buttons as well is okay. If I push this button and I say this, they'll feel guilty. If I push this button and I say this, they'll feel that they need to be sympathetic If I push this button. I know this. One time this happened and I've been using it for years to get you to do this. And so you acquiesce. And you acquiesce because you're giving up and you're saying I agree to a different form of reciprocity than should be fair to me and should be fair to you. That is fair exchange, and we've talked about this in other podcasts. The four types of exchange You've got fair exchange. You've got fair exchange. You've got criminal exchange. You've got exchange in abundance or just no exchange at all.
Speaker 2:No exchange right.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and so that's where reciprocity comes in, is it has to be at a minimum fair exchange, and that doesn't mean financially, that means something else. Go ahead, glenn exchange.
Speaker 2:And that doesn't mean financially, that means something else. Go ahead, glenn, for sure. And I give exchange in abundance to the fourth dynamic right, what we're doing right now the fact that we're sitting here three, four times a week, depending on our schedules and stuff we come up with these podcasts, we do our research, we dive in, we draw on this our wealth of knowledge. We're giving exchange and abundance to the people who want to view this and watch this or whatever the case may be. We give exchange and abundance because that's given to our fourth dynamic right, to humanity. And we want this content and these messages and the breakdown and the conversations around LRH materials. We want that to be out there so that humanity can benefit from that right. When I come back on my third dynamic, it's all about fair exchange. Second dynamic it's all about fair exchange. Like I can't require, just because you're listening to this, I can't require you to give to me directly, right? So it has to be exchange in abundance on that level, because I don't know you. If you're just sitting here listening to this podcast, I might not know you and the people who I'm close to, business dealings, yada, yada, yada. I want my money, I expect it to be done. I expect it to be handled. I expect it to be an even exchange in what we do.
Speaker 2:When I'm dealing with my second dynamic, right in the kitchen right now, cooking dinner while I'm making money, while I'm doing, I expect there to be a fair exchange for all that I give and all that I do in relationship. I want there to be a fair exchange of that and vice versa. I don't ever want my partner to feel like you don't get enough, you don't get, you don't. You don't have enough, you're not happy enough, you don't have enough. Whatever it is that you feel you need or want, I make sure you are good. You make sure I'm good. Second dynamic what are we sure you are good?
Speaker 1:you make sure I'm good second dynamic, what we doing right.
Speaker 1:That goes with my son too, who's on the second dynamic yeah, well, one of the things that I've uh, you know, I've seen on the well, third, third, but more fourth dynamic, and I I think I mentioned it in a in a podcast before, but when I made the Meeta Reads film back in 2013, I made sure that I got a accurate agreement through as many people who had been technically trained both in the church and some outside of the church, and I listed all of those people. As you know, these were supporters who agreed yeah, this is what this read looks like and everything like that, because I knew I needed to have some sort of insurance on it. It isn't just what I say. This is because we don't have LRH to say what these things are are, and it was something that didn't exist in the field, and it is by far the most viewed video aogp has ever created. We're at like 20 000 something views now over yeah, over 10 years on.
Speaker 1:And when I produced that video and this isn't was an interesting phenomenon when I that video, I got a shit ton of hate mail. This isn't right. Why didn't you do this? That's not an FN and I had this insurance. I had class 12 flag-trained auditors pre-Golden Age of Tech, tech before everything changed in the church, review it and tell me. I even had dan coon, who was worked with lrh on a daily basis in person, no degree of separation, and he said you've done it, this is exactly what the field needs. This is perfect, very well done. And I still had haters. And what was the exchange? What was the reciprocity there? I've even had I had hypha org, uh and and their independence in in israel. They asked me you know if, if I could send them a copy of it so they could put it on DVD and they could use it in a course room. And what was the reciprocity there?
Speaker 1:Well, for me it was needed and wanted by the field. Go ahead.
Speaker 2:For sure, and it was exchange in abundance. You sat there and spent the time to produce an actual video that, in this case, seemed to be dvd worthy on some level. So I, I, absolutely love that. But haters gonna hate like that, that's that's they exchange, that's what they give. They give hate, you know.
Speaker 1:Right and so it typifies what we're. What we're talking about is right, you know. Fourth, dynamically, this is the thing that it, that that needs to be done and at the the views that it's gotten, I can see that they've watched it so long and everything you used it when you, when you were here uh, yeah, doing the meters course right.
Speaker 1:Our, our own students use it and everything. But you know the the the point is is that you you have to be willing to put yourself out there, but don't expect anything in return other than the fact that you know what you did was the best you could do and was right for everyone, despite what anybody else would say. And don't step off that point. You have to have your own resolve and go. I did everything I could, I made sure it was. I spent three months on that and it's not something that I'm hung up on, but it just blew me away how people could say well, you need to fix this, you need to add this, and it's like what are you? What are you giving in return? What are you bringing to the table on this?
Speaker 1:so don't much by the sound of it no, I'm not not much by the sound of it and you know I don't hear it.
Speaker 2:I don't hear anything about it now, but it still gets used and on youtube it's it's the most viewed video we have to date, by far let me say this I I hear a lot of people say you know, you do things without expecting anything in return, or you do things without I expect everything, I expect it, I expect it, I expect it, I expect it, I expect it, I expect it, I expect it. The word expectation, expectation, expectatio, expectare which basically means you want something to come out of for what you've done, and so I want, I expect what I've done, I expect something out of it. Now, in every breath I take, I expect, I expect to inhale. Now, sometimes it might not happen, and you know, knock on wood, it continues to happen for a long time, because I want to keep breathing, but I expect to breathe every time I breathe in and every time I breathe out. There is nothing in my life that I go into without expecting something out of it.
Speaker 1:Nothing, and we did a podcast on assumptions and expectations not long ago.
Speaker 1:And reciprocity is how much because you've only got so many days, years, whatever, in this life with this body? And how much are you putting forth to to other things where there is either no return, because you know that's the way you want it, or there is some exchange in some form, hopefully fair exchange or exchange in abundance, but reciprocity. You have to take that into consideration because if something or someone is not willing to reciprocate, is it a good investment? So you have to pay attention to that, depending on what the tone level is of the person that you're dealing with, and if you do that you won't be at a negative sum, result, balance, gain.
Speaker 2:You just hit it, you just said it. It's the tone level and it's so important. That's why I said it earlier Haters gonna hate, because that's what they do. That's why Cat Williams said that. He said haters gonna hate, that's what they do. That's what Cat Williams said. He said haters go hate, that's what they do. They hate. It's the tone level.
Speaker 2:And so you as a sane, as a hopefully well-functioning mentally, physically, financially, emotionally person, you're going to spot when somebody is not operating at your emotional tone level. Right, you're going to spot when somebody is not operating at the level that you wish to, and therefore you get to decide who you're going to communicate with. This is why LRH said in the Code of Honor only give or receive communication if you self-desire it. I'm not giving you anything if I don't desire to give it to you. I don't care what it is, it could be a last breath. I ain't giving it to you if I don't desire to give it to you.
Speaker 2:And so the idea here is that you want to make sure that you're connecting with people that are operating at your tone level or above. Hear me, this is very important. You want to connect with people who are operating at your tone level or above. You want to connect with people who are operating at your financial level or above. You want to connect with people who are operating at your emotional intelligence level or above. This is extremely important because if you're not, you're deciding to ingest parasites. So if I put a plate of tapeworms down and you know these things are parasites, would you eat them? No, you wouldn't. It would be disgusting to you, it would be nasty. You need to look at people like that. You're a tapeworm. I'm sorry I get on these rants. Sorry guys, that's very true. That's very true.
Speaker 3:But yeah, because I mean we're always falling into contracts and you know we quite often fall into uneducated contracts and those contracts tend to go against us at times. So yeah, that's a good point of view.
Speaker 1:Yeah Well, and I mentioned this in so many podcasts and it's a toughie to take, but you, you know, the only thing you can be guilty of, per lrh, is being there and communicating who? Who were you talking to in that room? Who were you talking to in that text? Who did you sign that contract with? And you you either ignored, didn't know, or knew what you, what it was that you were dealing with. And you know, I understand the didn't know.
Speaker 1:But the thing is is, if you know your emotional tone scale and you know your chart of human ability and what people do with communication, you can literally look in that communications column where you say x and they think Y. I've seen that so many times just this week alone and it blindsides me because you haven't been around, you haven't dealt with a person long enough to really get a good sample, a good database of how they behave on certain issues. And then you look back on it and they said X, you thought Y because there was no way in the world they could actually mean that. And well, I just I put it right out there for you, it's right in front of you, and then you go. You meant this when you said that Because it would be unconscionable, that it was double the cost, double the cost. Well, I told you about it, uh-uh-uh-uh-uh-uh-uh-uh-uh, no, no, no, no, no, there's no way. So you have to be careful and you have to ask questions and don't just think that it's all sunshine, rainbows and unicorns.
Speaker 2:And catch this. You even got to be that careful, really, to be honest with you. You just got to be clear, Like I say all the time and anybody who watches podcasts for a length of time knows like you says, the higher your standards, the better your life, Right. And so you really don't even have to be careful with dealing with people. You just got to be clear in dealing with them. I'm not tiptoeing through the tulips just to come see you. I'm not doing that. I'm letting you know right now. This is who I am. This is what I'm trying to create in my life. This is the experience that I desire to have. If that is agreeable with you, come on board and let's co-create this thing together. But if it's not, I'm not tiptoeing through the tulips. Listen, I have very high standards in how I operate and it's not something that I feel any kind of way about. I just think it's a wonderful thing to be and I want the same thing for everybody I deal with.
Speaker 2:I want you to hold me to a high standard right, I want you to hold me accountable yeah, yeah period yeah, this is where I'm coming even even scripture says even scripture says in proverbs the fool hates discipline, the fool hates uh uh discipline. And so if if you got somebody who don't like being disciplined, then they are and you need to treat them as such. Yeah.
Speaker 3:Well and absolutely.
Speaker 1:Like LRH says, when you start to put order into an area, confusion blows off, and if they're disagreeing with that order, okay, then I know.
Speaker 2:Just confusion, Right right.
Speaker 1:Then I know what. It's. Just confusion, Right right. Then I know what's going on. So if you can agree by these terms and Arthur says this a lot the T's and C's, terms and conditions, If you can agree, if you can agree to these T's and C's, then we shall proceed. If you cannot agree to these T's and C's and you continue to be out ethics and want something for nothing, Out exchange. Out exchange. Well then, okay, now we know what the reality is.
Speaker 2:Right. And if you want to be a criminal, then let's treat you like a criminal, I'm okay. I'm okay with that. The criminals exist and everybody is not going to be, you know, a saint walking on God's green earth. I totally understand. If you want to be a criminal, then let's. Let's treat you as a criminal. If you want to take from me without giving back, if you want to take from me without exchange, you're stealing, you're taking without there being some reciprocity. And if you want to be a criminal, I will treat you like a criminal. Some reciprocity.
Speaker 1:And if you want to be a criminal, I will treat you like a criminal. Right Rights are earned.
Speaker 2:Yes, and good people have rights. Good people have rights.
Speaker 1:Good people have rights. That's true, and your definition of good is what you put out there and say this is what I will accept. That is fair exchange, that is reciprocity, and if that person can't or persons can't do that, then you know, okay, I need to surround myself with different people in my orbit and vice versa in their orbit, and that's it. So there has to be reciprocation. I hope this has gotten across to people what we're talking about. But you need to surround yourself with people who believe in fair, or greater than fair, exchange and abundance, for example, and you need to make it clear and known yes, because if you don't, that's on you.
Speaker 2:It is. And wouldn't it be wonderful, wouldn't it be wonderful if we could get into relationships, friendships, partnerships, family situations, business relationships, if we could get into relationships where we beat each other, we try to beat each other, giving. Wouldn't it be great if I like you and you like me, and then you want to give me some love and I want to beat you. You ain't going to outlove me, I'm going to outlove you, and then the other person turn around and try to outlove you? Wouldn't it be wonderful if we get into business relationships where we can outgrow our businesses to each other and we have this healthy competition with each other where it's like, oh, you think you're doing well, let me show you what I can do.
Speaker 2:My best friend used to tell me he said Q man, his name is Jason. He said Q man, I love you, but I love you better, rich Right, and we would joke about it. And I loved it when he said it because it made me feel so empowered to go out there and make him love me better. I want you to love me better.
Speaker 1:And that self, that self-worth, and you're, you're granting each other the beingness of what your self-worth is, as opposed to what it could be. That's that much better, and and that's that's the best.
Speaker 2:And it's not putting each other down, like it's not putting each other down and making you feel like, man, you ain't doing nothing, you ain't like. Come on, I'm not dealing with that at all at all.
Speaker 1:You better count your teeth yeah, that's a positive reciprocity, sure. So I hope everybody's enjoyed this podcast. We're gonna have to go uh busy day ahead.
Speaker 2:All right, sorry if I got too excited.
Speaker 1:It's okay, pastor Q.
Speaker 3:The Bible says Hallelujah.
Speaker 1:So, for Quentin and Arthur and myself, we'll see you soon for another podcast, early in the week. Namaste, and we love you. Bye, bye, peace, bye bye.
Speaker 3:Thank you, thank you.