0142 Female Led Relationships: Coffee Talk about Pegging, Cock Cages, and Lace Panties

Pour a cup (or spike it if you need to), because this week is straight-up coffee talk with Miss Krystine—raw, unfiltered, fast, and unapologetically real.

From my recent release from TikTok jail to some very real conversations about body image, male chastity, cuckolding, and swinging, this episode covers it all. I reflect on the emotional weight behind choices like locking up your partner, why some people STILL care way too much about what their friends think, and what happens when shame and insecurity take the wheel.

Also? I drop her thoughts on lingerie, punishment and reward dynamics, and how pegging might now be rebranded as “shmegging” on TikTok. (We’ll let you decide if that sticks.)

What You'll Walk Away With:

• Why trying to "convince" your partner to swing is a fast-track to relationship disaster
• How chastity changes a man—and why that attentiveness is chef’s kiss for dominant women
• Why cock cages and lace panties are hot as hell (yes, she said it)
• Tips on punishment/reward that don’t involve pain—but pack a psychological punch
• How to start FLR conversations from a place of honesty, not coercion

Questions This Episode Helps Answer:

• How do I talk to my partner about swinging or chastity?
• What are healthy punishments and rewards in FLR?
• Why do submissive men wear panties and cock cages?
• What does female-led relationship structure look like in everyday life?
• How do I deal with insecurity or shame in the lifestyle?
• Can chastity improve intimacy in a relationship?
• Why do people keep getting banned on TikTok for talking about k

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Transcript

0:52

Had to hit my vape. Give myself some time to breathe. This podcast is intended for mature audiences only. If you're not 18 years of age or older, there are thousands of other podcasts you can listen to and you can come back and visit us when you are 18. This podcast is meant solely for entertainment. We are not licensed doctors, lawyers, or therapists. We simply have a fascination with the lifestyle and I'd love to share it with you and get your thoughts and opinions.♪♪♪Welcome back. Episode 42. This week, we're gonna do coffee time with Ms. Christine. Doesn't that sound fantastic? I maybe am not sipping on coffee, but I am sucking on a straw. Mm, but now let's get into some housekeeping. Housekeeping. Well, good old TikTok. Let me take a sip of my coffee for this one. Some asshat or asshatress, I don't know, whatever you want to call them, somehow, all of a sudden, I had six videos get reported for adult content or inappropriate, oh, nude, because I'm wearing a tank top. That automatically means I'm naked, which I'm not, except on the weekends, but I don't do TikToks. So I'm finally out of jail. I did a post today. And listen, if anybody follows me on TikTok, I would hope that you know, me doing TikToks is to lead you to the podcast where I can offer guidance or share my experiences. I by no means am trying to force this lifestyle on anyone. This is my choice, my lifestyle. I'm very happy in it. I'm not trying to push people into doing something they're not comfortable with, which leads me, well, we'll touch on that a little bit later in the episode, but I am out of jail. And now I'm going to have to get creative when I want to talk about cuckolding or pegging. So I'm thinking I'll call it duckholding or shmegging. I don't fucking know, but that's the news on the TikTok forefront. Ooh, maybe having coffee is not a good idea. This could be real fast, guys. Hang in there. Two, OnlyFans. Anybody that's requested a voiceover on OnlyFans, I am getting there. I've responded to all my messages from what I can tell, but I'm not a big fan of the OnlyFans messaging platform. It's kind of fucked up, but I think I've gotten through all my messages on there. Three, and let me do a PSA. I am also on a wellness journey to some extent as I drink my coffee full of caramel and creamer. While I am not comfortable with my body, there are certain areas that cause me real insecurities. Not that I give a fuck what other people think, but it's an area that I'm clearly very insecure about, and it's my stomach. I hate it, but I have to remind myself, one, I'm not doing a fucking thing to change it right now, so I need to change that first. Two, unless I have surgery, my stomach is never going to be flat and pretty because I've had three babies, and that's who the fuck I am. Now, I can say this and talk all big and act like I'm accepting of it, but it still bothers me sometimes. So I guess my whole point is, ladies, love yourselves. You get one body, love it. Four, my email. I think I've gotten to all of my emails. If you sent me an email and I did not respond, please send me a kick in the butt email or a gentle reminder, whichever you prefer. But I have had goals this past week, week and a half, and I've been doing my very best to respond on all of my platforms. If you have reached out to me and I have not reached out back or responded, please reach out again and say, hey, listen, I sent you such and such on this date and I didn't hear anything back, and I will get back to you because I appreciate you all and love you. All right, let's delve into coffee time with Ms. Christine. Shall we? Okay, back to TikTok just a bit. I received an email from somebody who wanted me to do a TikTok because they had convinced their partner, convinced is the word, or what was it? I think it was convinced their partner to participate in cup holding. Ooh, that's my new word for TikTok, cup holding, into cup holding. And their partner was a little apprehensive about being with another partner. And they wanted me to do a TikTok to help their case, so to speak. Here's what my thoughts are on that, or how I feel about that. First of all, it shouldn't be a matter of convincing as far as cup holding goes, or chastity, or any other lifestyle thing. It should be a conversation, or a discussion that you and your partner have and are on the same page. Validate any feelings that your partner may have about the whole lifestyle. It's big and scary. Patience is key in communication and never fucking force your partner to do something they don't wanna do. Second of all, the fact that there's apprehension in being with somebody else leads me to believe that maybe there wasn't a discussion that took place. That it was more of a, I think we should do this, or we're gonna do this, or you should do it because you'll really like it. And God forbid, I hope it wasn't, if you don't do this, I'll leave you, which I suspect it wasn't. But sometimes my brain goes to the worst place. However, with any of this, it has to be an open discussion. And the quickest way to ruin your relationship is forcing your partner to do something they don't want to do. It's only going to drive a wedge deeper between the two of you. Just my opinion, take it for what it is. But I wanted to share that. Oh, so at my happy place this weekend, the topic of, so my subbie was not at camp with me this past weekend until Sunday. And so I was flying solo. There was a discussion that was, somebody asked me something about why I lock my husband in a cock cage. And this whole discussion took place and I've said multiple times in here why I do it. I can reiterate if anybody has questions, hit me up. But the response was, the common male response. Nobody's locking my cock in a cage. And on that same note, I heard a comment of oral sex ninja, basically. And I'm wired a little differently and I'm kind of on the fence about oral sex. And that's a topic for another discussion. But the comment, and this comes from so many men on different platforms. Oh, fuck you like you've never been fucked. Or I guarantee I can make you come this way when you normally don't. Or listen, confidence, excuse me by the way, confidence is a good thing. And I appreciate confidence. Cockiness is a whole nother thing. And yes, you may be good at your skill, but that doesn't mean that you're going to please everyone. Just my opinion on that as well. But I think the biggest thing that bothers me about discussions that I've been in when it comes to chastity is, what are my friends going to say? Or, oh my gosh, my buddy will think I'm just the biggest loser ever or will make fun of me or whatever. Listen, if you want to lock your dick in a cage, that's your business. That's not your fucking dad's business. That's not your best friend's business. That's between you and your partner. End of discussion. Who you choose to tell is all, I mean, that's your choice. Don't fucking tell them. But how do you feel living your life knowing that you're not doing something because you care what other people will think? Sounds like you might be missing out on something. I don't know. I just, it really blows me away how much people care what other people think. I'm guilty. I obviously care. I wouldn't have had the whole conversation about my stomach, but I don't give a fuck what people think about what I do in my relationship with my husband. That's between him and I. Obviously, discretion is necessary for our children, but other than that, it's our fucking choice and we're not hurting anyone. So that's where I'm at with that. All right, one other thing I wanted to talk about on the chastity topic. I did receive an email from someone and because I believe last week I had said something like, share your opinions with me on why you enjoy chastity or what it is about chastity that you like. And I received a fantastic email that was so well-written. I love when I get feedback and it's well-written. It makes me laugh and it's just spot on. I just love it. It's my favorite. And it was just a good email. But, and I think this coincides with the reason, part of the reason we also participate in chastity. I love the attentiveness that I get from my subbie when he is locked up. It is like no other. And like I've said, he is very attentive to me even when he isn't locked up, but subconsciously the second that cage goes on, he's a totally different person. And I love it. I also love the control. I also think for him, also in this email, that's a lot of alsos. Maybe I should have some more coffee. That should be fun, right? Let's see how fast I can talk on here. Not to mention him having the cage on, I think also solidifies his role as my submissive. And while sometimes kids, family, life, all of that shit gets in the way, his true happy place is being my submissive. And I know that might sound cocky, but ask him. That's what he'll tell you. And in honesty, if at any time he ever said, I don't wanna do this anymore. I don't wanna wear a cock cage anymore. I don't wanna be your submissive. I want us to be 50-50. I'd be like, fine. I just wanna be with you. I'd probably be a little pissy about it, but at the end of the day, he is my soulmate. And no matter what lifestyle we choose to live, he is my other half. And we go through ebbs and flows. We have to live a very vanilla life a lot of the time. And having that cage just gives us, you have that little secret with your partner that's just between the two of you. It's fantastic. And it's something that we can do in our day-to-day lives to solidify our female-led relationship. And I love it. I love everything about it, as does he. Also in the email, it was brought up about wearing women's panties. Now, I know that crosses the line for some men, but let me tell you, for me personally, seeing him in a cock cage and a nice pair of lace panties, there's really nothing hotter. I mean, it's fucking sexy. I also like, I like the way it looks. I like the way it makes him feel. And it also gives me a little sense of control, which is a fantastic podcast that we're still working on. Thanks for hanging in there. But I love that control of what I can make him wear. And again, it's like our little secret, kind of like the cock cage. So if there's any men out there that are thinking about wearing women's panties, cage or no cage, listen, try it. I think you'll like it. And hey, if you don't, it's not for you and that's okay. But don't give a fuck what other people think. You'd be surprised what thrown on a pair of women's panties will do for your subconscious. Mm, and it's fucking hot. Wow, we've covered a lot of ground. I've talked really fast and now my mouth is dry, so I should have more coffee. This is gonna be a fun one for you guys to listen to. Okay, back at the ranch. Let me switch this page real quick. Don't mind the, don't mind the noise. All right, one other thing I kind of wanted to address, swinging. I seem to have a pretty big influx in who's downloading my podcast or who's listening to my podcast lately. So to any new listeners, welcome. If you've made it this far, I probably should have done this at the beginning, but let me explain a little bit about my dynamic. So my subbie and I have been together for seven years. We will be married for five years this New Year's Eve. We live a female-led relationship, meaning I own his ass or I'm the dominant, he's the submissive. And we also practice chastity. We do chastity as often as we can. Obviously I give him breaks now and then. I have had questions about, if we have a, if we, about? Boy, me and my Minnesota and the coffee. Squirrel. I've had some questions about punishments, rewards, if we schedule orgasms, anything like that. So I will address that here in case anybody else is wondering, or for any new listeners, I just kind of wanted to give you a rundown of what kind of dynamic that we lead. Or live, whichever. As you know, if you have been a listener for a while, me and scheduling don't go so well together. My time management is getting better, but it can be a struggle. So we do not currently schedule days. We used to do Sunday fun day. Now it's more of just, hey, I'm horny and I wanna fuck you, so take it off. That's kind of how we schedule. And in reality, that's kind of how our life goes. We're quite spontaneous, go with the flow. Not big planners. We'll see how that goes when we're living in an RV full-time. Punishments. My subbie is a good boy. He doesn't get many punishments. And my punishments are a little different. If he does get punished, I do things like I don't let him touch me for 24 hours. And during that 24 hours, I wear every item of clothing that I know drives him wild. And then I don't let him touch me. Or I do things to him that I know drive him wild, but he can't touch me in return. That's my punishments, things like that. Rewards. Well, for instance, this weekend at camp, there's a cross and I put him on there and gave him a little bit of some spanking with a flogger and crop. So that's kind of his reward. He's a hard worker and he enjoys that. Even though it may sound like a punishment, it is not. He enjoys it very much. What else did I say? Oh, we discovered too that we've been doing chastity for almost six years. Sure doesn't seem like it's been that long. And another common question I get too is starting out in chastity. This has popped up a lot lately. How to get into it. I would suggest taking it slow. Don't get frustrated. You're gonna have your periods of time where you have no desire to be in the cage and that's okay. Do what works for your relationship. Start out slow. Remember the night boners generally go away after a couple nights. Find a cage that works for you, that is comfortable and always be checking your balls for open sores. You don't wanna get an infection in your testes, bad news. And that's all been covered in other episodes too. And the last thing I'd like to talk about is swinging. I've gotten some feedback from some people who are into swinging but their partner is not or how do I approach my partner about swinging? We are not, I fucking hate labels as you all know, or if you're new here, I fucking hate labels. I would not classify us as swingers. We may dabble. My submissive as of right now would never sleep with any, I wouldn't, he has no desire, but I don't want him to either. And that's just the communication we've had. Now, if we find a couple that we have a connection to, it's not out of the realm of possibility, but I personally just don't think I'm there yet. And that's okay, that's just where we are in our relationship. It's not completely out of the question. However, me not being there or being ready to take that next step to maybe try out swinging, I will tell you, I can't imagine if he was pushing me towards it. You should always communicate, but don't, like I said, don't push your partner into something they're not ready for. It is a recipe for fucking disaster. Talk about it, explain, take the fucking sex out of it. My other favorite phrase, take the sex out of it. Explain to your partner why it would be hot to watch them sleep with someone else. What are your emotions behind it? And I think me as a woman, my biggest fear and my biggest thing is my insecurities. I don't want him to sleep with someone else. What if she's better than me? Which is all bullshit, as I know. I mean, everybody does things differently and having a new partner can be exciting and hot, but I'm not comfortable with letting him sleep with anybody. He doesn't wanna sleep with anybody. He's content having me lock his penis in a cage and use it whenever I want. And that's our dynamic. However, we have discussed swinging. We have talked about different people that I was like, ooh, fuck no, you would never sleep with them. Or I might not be opposed. And I think the more you talk about it, whether it's who you would be okay with them sleeping with or why you don't wanna swing, continue talking about the things that are positives or pros to swinging and negatives. And remember, in my personal opinion and most people that I've talked to, their first experience is real fucking awkward. And you can do pages and pages and pages of rules. Something always ends up happening the first time that crosses those because there's so many rules to remember. So if you're gonna do or try your hand at swinging, just make sure you and your partner are on the same page and be ready for the fact that it might be a little bit awkward. And that's okay. You might decide after the first time it's absolutely not for you. That's okay too. I guess my biggest thing basically about this whole thing, chastity, FLR, swinging, whatever the case may be, just make sure you and your partner are on the same page. A lot of comments that I get on my TikToks are about how this ruins relationships and this is terrible and so wrong. It's not. Because if you find the people that have open lines of communication, it's not bad at all. They have the strongest relation. In fact, there's people in my campground who've been married for 20 years, 10 years, 30 years. These relationships can absolutely work because they have a solid foundation, communication, honesty. Just take the sex away from it and focus on how well you communicate together. I think a lot of the negativity comes from the fact that the people aren't fucking communicating. They don't talk to each other. Or they're too embarrassed to say how they feel. Fuck that, life's short. And if you love the person you're with, tell them how the fuck you feel. You're only hurting yourself if you don't and possibly your relationship. I think that wraps up coffee time with Ms. Christine. I would love to hear any of your thoughts, comments, opinions even on kind of what we talked about today or just your dynamic. I love hearing about people's stories. I love getting emails from people just telling me how they live their life or even asking me a few questions here or there. I am totally open to discussion. So all my contact information is in my show notes. If you have questions, concerns, wanna talk about anything, hit me up. And if I've had coffee, we can talk real fast together. It'll be real fun. I hope everyone has a fantastic week. Thank you so much for listening. I love all of you for taking time out of your day to listen to me ramble quickly on Coffee Days. I hope you enjoyed the episode. I will see you next week. Be good human beings. Love you all. Can we come in?