Bowel Moments
Real talk about the realities of IBD...On the rocks! Hosts Robin and Alicia interview people living with Crohn's disease, ulcerative colitis, or indeterminate colitis (collectively knows as Inflammatory Bowel Diseases or IBD) and the medical providers who care for our community. Join us to meet people affected by IBD- we laugh, we cry, we learn new things, we hear inspiring stories, and we share a drink.
Bowel Moments
From Battlefield to Bathroom: Bryan Schulze's IBD Journey
** Warning that this episode talks very candidly and descriptively about surgery and more.**
Few IBD stories contain as many twists, complications, and near-death experiences as Bryan Schulze's journey with ulcerative colitis. What began with occasional bleeding during his military deployment escalated into a life-threatening medical emergency when doctors discovered he had been hemorrhaging internally for months. With severe anemia and barely conscious, Bryan's introduction to IBD came with a stark realization — he had been slowly dying without knowing it.
Bryan's candid account takes us through the harrowing reality of military service with undiagnosed IBD, the struggle to maintain dignity while bleeding profusely, and the complex surgeries that followed. After medication failures and complications that defy belief, Bryan underwent a full colectomy and J-pouch surgery that led to severe complications including a massive abdominal infection, wound vacuum treatments, and catastrophic surgical errors.
Beyond the physical trauma, Bryan shares the emotional and professional toll of IBD. From workplace discrimination to failed career dreams, steroid-induced diabetes to heart failure, and battles with depression and anxiety — his story encompasses the full spectrum of challenges IBD patients may face. Yet through it all, Bryan found his way back through support from his family, reconnection with his faith, and an indomitable will to live.
Now serving as a police officer with a permanent ostomy bag, Bryan offers powerful wisdom to fellow IBD warriors: "Take a deep breath. It's not a life ender. It is a life changer. Be willing to adapt with it so that you can overcome it and still live the life that you were given to live." His message of resilience serves as a beacon for anyone facing seemingly insurmountable health challenges.
Have you been struggling with IBD? Share your story or questions with us, and remember that no matter how difficult your journey, you're never alone in this fight.
Links:
- Our episode with Dr. Anish Patel
- Our episode with Matty Bowels!
- Veterans with IBD Support Group- Cron's & Colitis Foundation USA
- About IBD Podcast episode with Dr. Anish Patel
- John's story of serving in the Royal Marines in the UK- Crohn's & Colitis UIK
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Hi, I'm Alicia and I'm Robin and you're listening to Bowel Moments, the podcast sharing real talk about the realities of IBD. Serve on the rocks.
Speaker 2:This week we talked to Brian Scholes. Brian was diagnosed with ulcerative colitis when he was in the military. We talked to him about his very winding and complicated journey to diagnosis and to treatment and to the many, many obstacles he faced. We talked to him about how he's utilized the military healthcare system and what that has been like, and we talked to many other things, including mental health and faith. Just a warning to folks, though, that we do get descriptive about mental health and also about surgery and go pretty darn deep. So if you're very sensitive, just be careful. Thanks.
Speaker 1:Hi everyone, Welcome to Bell Moments. This is Alicia.
Speaker 3:Hey, everyone, it's.
Speaker 1:Matt here. How are we doing? Unfortunately, robin is not able to join us today, and so we're very excited to welcome back Matt Kasabian to the show. So, matt, thank you for coming to the host. It is very amazing to be here.
Speaker 3:It's been a minute, but I'm so excited to co-host. It is very amazing to be here. It's been a minute, but I'm so excited to co-host and looking forward to talking to Brian today with his story as well, and co-hosting with you, alicia. So first off, we would like to start off the show with Brian. What are you drinking today? An electrolyte drink water. Oh, you are being healthy and I love it.
Speaker 1:Perfect, that's well done. I actually also have an electrolyte drink next to me, because I am in the mountains and I don't understand why moisture doesn't exist here. Matt, what are you drinking? I?
Speaker 3:unfortunately, am just drinking a giant Stanley of water today too. I just got off of work, but there's a high noon near me. I'm thinking about getting that, but also the same time, I am like four Stanleys behind in water today, so I really need to catch up and chug this real quick.
Speaker 1:Good plan. Well, cheers guys.
Speaker 3:Cheers, cheers.
Speaker 1:Okay, Brian. Next question for you Tell us your IBD story. What brings you into our community?
Speaker 4:Well, let's see. My name is Brian Schultz and I have been an IBD patient since 2010. So a little bit about my backstory. I joined the Army at 17, right after 9-11, december 15th of 2001. Joined the Reserves, went to basic and AIT, came back, finished high school and then I switched my job from combat engineer to infantry because I wanted to go fight in the war and I went to 10th Mountain Division and then I was in the initial invasion of Fallujah and then I was there 03-04. And then we came back and then I went to Afghanistan 06-07. And then I came back and then I went to Iraq again 08-09.
Speaker 4:I'd say the first time I ever noticed anything going on with my bowels was in Afghanistanghanistan was the first time I had had any type of blood in my soul. I had no idea, thought it was like hemorrhoidal, something like that, and it was a like a wham bam. Thank you, ma'am. It happened and it disappeared. No issues after that. But I did have like what we thought was dysentery. I thought I got dysentery for like nine months, like it was just a long period of just constant. Like I had to go. I had to go. So we got back from Afghanistan. I PCS, which is I changed my station, which was Fort Drum at the time. Then I went to Fort Hood. When I got to Fort Hood I went over to Iraq for the second time and I was in Missoula, iraq. No issues, everything was fine.
Speaker 4:We came back in November. We're into November. Beginning of December we came back to the States and then around January I started to have a little bit of blood. It was light, it was light bleeding and things like that every once in a while. In February it really became known to me that, hey, why am I bleeding? And it became concerning. Didn't think anything of it. I did ask my medic about it. I did go to the doctors hey, why am I bleeding? I said it could be internal hemorrhoids or it could just be hemorrhoids in general and that if it keeps going on or if it gets worse, you know, let them know. Well, it didn't for a while and then it slowly, progressively got worse.
Speaker 4:But me, being an infantryman, I was full of pride, spit, fire and vinegar, thought I could handle it, take care of myself, it was going to pass. Maybe it's what I was eating. You know, I was and I was scared, to be honest. I mean. It's scary when you got blood coming out your backside and you don't know why. So I bled from February of 2009 until October of 2010. So it got to the point where I had like golf ball size to almost baseball size clots coming out. I thought I'd need to use a restroom and I was just it was clots of blood. It wasn't. It was pulling up in my, in my anus, and it was waiting to fall out. So, technically, I was hemorrhaging and I didn't know it. I was bleeding to death internally, and how I found this out was about two weeks.
Speaker 4:So we have in the military we had what's called a periodic health assessment and about two weeks maybe a month prior to that, I was sitting on my couch. We had just woken up. It was like eight o'clock in the morning. I wound up passing out until four or five o'clock that afternoon. It was like, wow, that's weird passing out until four or five o'clock that afternoon. She was like, wow, that's weird, it's already four. Why did I pass out? I just felt lethargic. Everything was weird. Anyways, I ate, something went to bed. I felt fine, so I had. It was what I know now to be a flare up. I was bleeding a little bit at work. I thought I could get it off the toilet enough when I flushed or whatever, so nobody would see it.
Speaker 4:And, mind you, after I had started bleeding, in February I went to warrior leaders course, which is the non-commissioned officer development course in the army, and I finished, I believe, 12th or 15th in my class. So I was up there in the ranking of the class. But I did PT tests. I was in the field. We did road marches, land nav, we did all sorts of stuff while this was going on and I toughed it out. I was in the field. We did road marches, land nav, we did all sorts of stuff while this was going on and I toughed it out because I was scared, didn't know how to deal with it, didn't know what it was. And then, after I graduated that school, the army said hey, we want you to go be a recruiter, which brings me to the time period we're at. So I went to recruiter school. Well, I finished recruiter school and I came back. I was recruiting in Georgetown, texas.
Speaker 4:So this brings us to where we're at now, when I was talking about passing out. And the weird thing is is I rode a motorcycle for seven and a half years. It was my only motor transportation. It was a little ninja. It makes it kind of scary, right. So I'm bleeding. I passed out, had no idea what was going on.
Speaker 4:Well, I get, I get to work, start bleeding at work every once in a while. And then my little tiny female center commander the first female I'd ever had in charge me the entire time I was in the army and she's hard. She comes out of the bathroom one day and I'm sitting at my desk and she goes. Look, it's not that time of the month for me. I don't know who's bleeding in this office, but somebody needs to come clean. And I was like damn it. And I went back and I talked to her and I was like, sorry, I think it's me and she goes. She looked at me dumbfounded. I was like, yeah, this has been happening. She's like when's your next periodic health assessment? I was like on the 12th I believe it was the 12th or the 10th of October and she goes I want you to bring it up at your PHA. So I had taken pictures of some of the clotting and when I'd go to wipe and I'd have a blood clot on the paper or on the toilet paper and how look like somebody poured. Somebody poured red wine into the toilet. It was that dark so I took pictures of that, took pictures of the clots in the toilet, took pictures of the clots on the toilet paper.
Speaker 4:And I go to my periodic health assessment. Well, I go through everything and, mind you, I've been driving, walking, recruiting, I've been doing my military thing, not knowing what's going on with me. I've been playing with my son, I've been riding motorcycles in my motorcycle club, all this stuff. I've been living my life, normal, not knowing that I'm dying.
Speaker 4:So I get to the periodic health assessment and I show the nurse practitioner and she looked at me scared. I had the scared look on her face. This is old lady. And she puts her hand right here and she pulls down my eyelid and it's white like bone white, okay, and she goes sweetheart, I need you to lay down. And I was like what do you mean? She goes? You are, there's no blood in your face. She's like I don't understand it. But there's no blood in your face. I need you to lay down and I need you to just stay there. You're going to go to the ER. So she called the ambulance. I had no blood platelets in my face, how it was moving, how I was functioning, how my brain was working, I don't know. So she lays me down, I go to the ER and then, mentally I guess, I get to the safe place and everything starts happening the pain, the cramps, and you know, I think about this now.
Speaker 4:Before that I had had toppling cramping in my stomach. It would be so severe sometimes where I would have to bend at the waist and I couldn't breathe, and it was just like it would be, like I got hit in the gut with like a baseball bat and it would happen random and I'd have to catch my breath and I'd have to be like I'm all right. So I had had the cramping before. I knew what the gut pain was, but I didn't know what it was, what was causing it. So I go to Darnell, which is the hospital at Fort Hood, and they didn't even want to admit me, like it was that bad. They're like, oh, this guy's full of shit, all this other stuff. They didn't want to admit me. My blood count was so low and I was in so much pain. They literally strapped me to a standing gurney and pumped me full of Dilaudid and then they started an infusion because it took three full units of blood in seven days to get my blood platelets to finally stabilize. They were that low I was literally on the verge of dying due to blood loss internal blood loss. So they don't want to admit me. Their gastroenterologist is out on leave. They don't have a backup. There's nobody that can see me. They don't want to handle it at Darnell up in Fort Hood, so they send me to Fort Sam, houston. So I get ambulanced.
Speaker 4:The three-hour ride to Fort Sam from Fort Hood, texas, and I meet this Indian dude the coolest can be and his name is Dr Anish Patel. Well, dr Patel takes me on and we get the test going. The go lightly going. If you know what go lightly is, it is horrible. And they gave it to me while I was getting an infusion. So what does that mean? You can't move. So you want to talk about a shitty situation? It was a shitty situation. They gave me a little bedside toilet and when it came out, it came out, it was like water being dumped out of a bucket loader into a bowl and it hitting the center of the bowl and wrapping up the walls of the bowl and wrapping up the walls, the bowl, and coming up and cascading out. So that gives you an idea of how my experience with ibd started.
Speaker 4:That next morning I get my colossus, my colonoscopy, and without hesitation he was like you have inflammatory bowels. I was like what's that goes, you have ulcerative colitis. I was like what's that? And he's like, well, it's stays in your small. They did a biopsy, is what they did. And then they came back and found that I had ulcerative colitis and so he goes, well, it's this, and ulcers form in your large intestine and it causes you to bleed. You get fissures that form in your intestine and you bleed out. I was like, well, how did I get it? He said it was pretty much an enzyme in your body that lays dormant, kind of like HIV or AIDS, and it takes a bacteria, stressful event or, you know, you eat a foreign food. A whole bunch of different stuff could have caused it. Well, at this time the army didn't know what was going on because, naturally, out of nowhere, hundreds of soldiers were coming down with inflammatory bowel disease, hundreds. And it all started after Iraq started over again Later on, when I, after I had been diagnosed, dr Patel had got it under control with medication therapy.
Speaker 4:So we got it under control. I was doing the suppositories, I was doing the enemas, I was doing everything to quill it. We hadn't gone to infusion treatment because at the time it didn't exist. So I got ulcerative colitis when it was still young and they were still figuring it out. The reason why we have the treatments for it today that we have is because of the influx of patients with it that came back from overseas. It was like, okay, we need to fix this, let's find a way to treat this and help these people not have the surgery that I'm gonna get into that I had.
Speaker 4:So I had it under control. Everything was great. I was able to lose weight, like everything was going, and then I come down on recruiting orders and I get my orders and I managed to get everything going the way it should be going. First I was supposed to PCS to Wisconsin and magically I didn't wind up going to Wisconsin. I wound up going to Nevada and that's where I met my wife. I get married and six months into our marriage I have a flare up. This time it's bad and the medication stopped working. Nothing was working.
Speaker 4:To quill it, they put me on prednisone, a steroid that at 180 milligrams a day for a total of a year and a half, and I went from 200 pounds, 200 to 235 pounds with a 32 inch waist you know, prime of my life six pack, looking studly, you know. And a year and a half later I'm 298 pounds from inflammation and from the steroid, the weight gain and everything. And you look like I look like I could be popped with a needle and fly through the air. We tried hormone therapy with like supplements of like different minerals and stuff that my body might have been lacking. I went to a chiropractic like which doctor I guess you want to call it? The ones that do like the electrode testing and they tell you what your body is lacking in. So I tried that, tried to come off of the prednisone.
Speaker 4:We tried infusion therapy but my inflammation was so far gone I didn't take to the infusion, it just made me sick and it was like having chemotherapy. So the infusion treatment wasn't taking, it wasn't working and the problem was the team in Nevada didn't know how to treat it. They didn't have a specialist. They had a gastroenterologist but they didn't have a specialist and Dr Patel being the specialist that he is, that's why he was able to treat it, so my flare up couldn't have happened at the worst time. They treated incorrectly. They keep me on steroids. I become steroid dependent, meaning it will no longer stop bleeding without the steroids.
Speaker 4:So my option now is cut my large intestine out and either do a J pouch, which is pretty much an internal bag with your small intestine, or get a permanent bag on the outside. I'm young, I'm in my 20s, 30s and I'm sitting here. I'm like I have a bag that fills up with stool all day long sitting on the front of my stomach, or I have an internal bag that I'm supposed to have muscular restraint with. I'm supposed to be able to. Oh, I'm having a movement. I need to use the restroom. Yeah, that's a crock of shit. It doesn't happen like that. If you got to go, you got to go and you don't really have time to delay.
Speaker 4:So, anyways, I came to the decision to cut my large intestine out when I went to another periodic health assessment and I was getting evaluated because I was either going to get med boarded or I was going to get chaptered out of the army for weight gain because I got to 298 pounds and they didn't want to do their research. They didn't want to understand, they didn't want to believe that prednisone, a medication, could make me gain that much weight and all this other stuff. So a major in the marine corps, actually, something I never thought I'd ever have happen, because they're marines I'm not talking bad about marines, but they've got a way of thinking like drink some water, take a knee, get over it and drive on Right, and so does the infantry, hence why I'm in this situation. And it got as bad as it did. So he goes listen to me, the only person that is going to take care of you is you. He goes this is severe. You could be on the toilet one day and you could be thinking you're using the restroom. You could hemorrhage and bleed out and die on that toilet. I was like, okay, he goes. Go to your gastroenterologist and tell them you want a full colectomy surgery and cut it out and either do a J pouch or do a bag, but you need to get rid of it. It's the only thing that's going to cure you.
Speaker 4:So I opted for the J pouch and I went and saw the gastrointestinal surgeon. It took him 10 seconds. He bent me over his table, stuck the little scope in my butt. He looked at it and said, okay, you qualify. You have the worst looking colon I've ever seen. I was like, really he goes. Your colon is so inflamed I don't think there's a single spot on it that does not have an ulcer. I was like, okay, he goes. Can you be in surgery in two weeks, cause that's when we're doing it. I'm like, okay. So two weeks later I have a full colectomy.
Speaker 4:It was around April 2015. I had my surgery. I went in. I was completely overweight because of the prednisone and I had they. They did invasive. They cut me open, filleted me open with on the operating table, so all my guts were exposed. They stuck their hands down into my pelvis and he said he wanted to do it evasively because he wanted to make sure he got all the infected tissue. He didn't. So they made the J pouch and I had to heal. I wasn't having movements but I would get drainage because I had an ileostomy bag while my J pouch was healing.
Speaker 4:So they go to pop the staples after 15 days and my wound explodes and pus pours down my sides, pours down my belly because I had an infection in my abdomen after they stapled me shut because they didn't clean it properly and they did not treat the infection when it first started. So the infection had burrowed its way to my abdominal wall and started eating the fascia away on my abdominal wall. And if anybody doesn't know what that is, if you take your hands and you put your fingers together, like all the way to where your knuckles are touching, and it looks woven together, that's what your abdominal wall and your fascia is supposed to look like under your skin. But if you take those and separate those where your fingertips are touching slightly, you know, like interlaced, that's what my abdominal wall looks like. Back to the surgery, I didn't know my fascia had been eaten through by the infection. So they put me in a wound vac to clean out the infected tissue and get my abdomen to heal.
Speaker 4:My abdomen healed after about four months and that was some of the most pain I've ever felt in my life was getting a wound vac changed. They had to fill it with two vials of lidocaine before they could remove it. It was just excruciating. So did that for four months Every other day, driving from Susanville, california, to Reno, nevada, and back and forth every other day. After the surgery I was laid up for six months, lost a bunch of weight because I wasn't eating and I was on pain pills. So for six months I was hopped up on hydrocodone or Oxycontin or whatever they put me on for the pain and my pain had subsided and I didn't know it because I was staying high, pretty much off the opiates subsided, and I didn't know it because I was staying high, pretty much off the opiates. So that was another thing that I overcame in this whole process was not realizing I had become addicted to opiates.
Speaker 4:When I realized I had become addicted to the pain pills, I flushed them down the toilet and I got rid of them and I said I'm going to deal with this pain, no matter how bad it is, and I'm going to kick this. I had the sweats, scratches and twitches and I locked myself in my room and I just dealt with them and now that I've been in corrections and in law I could have killed myself, not knowing it, just flushing them down. I didn't detox. My detox was quick, fast, hurry and a slap in the face and I had no idea. So I overcame that. I no longer use any type of opiate pain medication, even when I'm in the hospital for anything, unless it's in a controlled environment. Anyways, back to what we were talking about. So I have my surgery, have the infection wound, vac and I have a J pouch now Thinking everything was going to be great hunky dory, and I'm still having issues.
Speaker 4:I'm not bleeding, but I'm going all the time. I have no control. I'm not bleeding, but I'm going all the time. I have no control. If I got to go, I got to go. I'm scared to go swimming, I'm scared to do anything like that, any type of strain. I'm scared to do anything strenuous because I'm worried I'm going to leak out on my backside because the muscle control is just not there. I go to a follow-up. The doctor's like oh, it's just your body getting used to the surgery, it's just your body adjusting and blah, blah, blah. They didn't do a colonoscopy, they didn't do an endoscopy, they didn't do anything to check it. So for three and a half years I'm living like this, spending 80 to 90% of my day on the toilet, no matter what I ate.
Speaker 4:I had no quality of life. We went to Florida to visit her dad at her dad's new house because he lives in Nevada and in Florida he's a big name real estate guy. So he's got two locations where he lives different times of the year. And we go to Nevada or we go to Florida. And when I say it was a problem, my 80 to 90% of my day in the bathroom was they told me not to push to let it fall out because of the bag, the internal bag pouch, the J pouch. I would be in that bathroom and not even realize it for 30 minutes to an hour every time. My wife said sometimes you wouldn't even realize it, brian, but you'd be in there for two and a half hours. We could watch a whole movie If we were going to go somewhere and he said give me a second, I need to use the restroom. They would turn a movie on in the living room and wait for me. So I had no quality of life and it was bothersome for my family and others and people because it was hard for me to do anything. If I had a project I was doing, it'd take me freaking a month to complete that project because of how often I'd have to use the restroom.
Speaker 4:So in 2019, after all this, we had moved from Nevada back to Texas. I had medically retired out of the army. In 2019, we moved back to Texas and it's just getting worse and worse and worse. And now I'm getting every nerve in my body firing at the same time when I'm using the restroom. No clue why. None of my blood work was ever showing. High white blood cell counts didn't show I had infection, nothing like that.
Speaker 4:So I reach out to the gastroenterology team and I and I ask is Dr Patel still working there? Yes, he is. So Dr Patel in 2019, comes to my rescue. He's like where you been? I was like I this. I was like where have you been? And he's like I was here. You know, becoming the head certified person in the in the military and I was like, well, I was getting screwed over in Nevada and they didn't know how to treat me thing. And here I am. This is what's happened. This is where I'm at help me, and he did the scopes and he did the tests he needed to do and I have pouchitis because the doctor left infected tissue on my anus, my sphincter muscle, and the moment my small intestine tissue touched my sphincter muscle on the internal moment my small intestine tissue touched my sphincter muscle on the internal side, it became infected with ulcerative colitis. So again, I'm suffering from IBD and I didn't even know it and there's really not a whole lot we could do about it. So I toughed it out for a little bit and then something told me cut your intestine, just cut it out, be done with it. You're never going to heal from this one. So it leads me to where I'm at today. I have a permanent ileostomy bag on the left side, where a colostomy bag should be. I have my ileostomy bag because I had a previous ileostomy bag on my right and the doctor didn't want to put it over existing scar tissue, which is understandable. Right, which leads me to this.
Speaker 4:Ivd surgeries can lead to other complications. So on top of getting the infection, on top of everything else, the doctor left infected tissue and he left scar tissue and he left a jumbled mess in my pelvis from where he had gone in there with his hands and physically pulled my large intestine away and cut it from my sphincter and connected my small intestine and created the J pouch. Everything was technically fused together. The doctor didn't know where to cut. So when the doctor made his incision not backing out and saying we need to reevaluate this and go back in he made a cut and he cut through my urinals and if you don't know what your urinal is, it's the internal vascular tube for your penis. He cut through my urinals, cutting the membrane that controls functionality. So that was a big shot to my life. So from 2019 until now, it's just now starting to come back to life and a way to where I can use it.
Speaker 4:So IBD did not only affect me bowel-wise, it affected me relationship, emotionally, physically. Everything you could think of like it sent me into this whirlwind of depression. I felt less of a man, all this other stuff. But the good thing was, even though he screwed me over and that was the one thing I asked him not to do because I knew the complications and his first cut screwed me. I don't know if he was ashamed or embarrassed, but he left my wife waiting in the waiting room of the general surgery clinic at BAMC I'm not going to give any names because he's no longer practicing but he left my wife there with nobody. Nobody came and updated her on the surgeries. Nobody did anything like that. She was there from seven in the morning and this 12 hours till seven at night and they had turned the lights off to the waiting room on her and she was sitting there. Nobody had come back to her. She thought I was dead.
Speaker 4:So he left me under the knife for 12 and a half hours. He over anesthetized me and I woke up with a suprapubic catheter, a penile catheter, an ileostomy bag and he had cut my anus out because we went permanent and he sewed me shut and a hole in my butt as big as this mason jar. So I spent three months in the hospital. They left the catheter in for six weeks, didn't change it, didn't check on it. Urology forgot about me and I brought it up all the time. Nothing happened.
Speaker 4:Well, they go to pull it out. And when they pull it out, instead of tubularly shrinking down to size, it flattens like a pancake and make sharp sides on the catheter. So when the doctor and she to my luck she was a female she rips it out, she knew it was going to be bad. She didn't say anything, but I could see her face before she pulled and she knew that the tube had collapsed. So when she pulled out the catheter it cut down the sides of my urethra and I thought I had felt pain with the, with the wound back, at wound back, and got shit on that. Let me tell you. She said that I went pale white like a ghost. There was no telltale sign. My eyes started flooding, my lips started quivering and I looked like a baby that had just gotten spanked for the first time. And I, she said I, looked more innocent than a newborn baby. And the tears and in the pain that went through my body, she legitimately, instantly, because she was a mom, she instantly grabbed me, pulled me to her bosom and started slowly rocking and petting my head and saying it's OK, we're done, I am so sorry. And then she went on to explain to me what happened. So IBD has led me to all of this. I have a permanent bag now.
Speaker 4:I spent three months in the hospital healing. I went through hyperbaric chamber treatment trying to get the skin and everything to heal on my backside because it just got to a point where it plateaued and I was walking. I was doing everything and I don't know what was going on. But three months go by and I finally said no, it's small enough to where I'm not going to get infected. If I go home and I can make it back to get it repacked, they would dry pack it, bandage it, send me on my way, dry pack it, bandage it. So three months later I go home, dry pack it. Every other day I'm going to San Antonio to get it repacked and checked on. And it was healed within two weeks. It was done, no issues.
Speaker 4:So during the time of me having IBD I was still working out or trying to. I was in the army. When I got out I became a car salesman. I was a manager at the Academy Sporting Goods store, all this stuff, but I started to have more issues. So this was the hardest part was working while I was spending 80 to 90% of my day in the bathroom. They couldn't fire me because I was 100 percent disabled, that they couldn't fire me for my medical issue. But they ostracized me and they pushed me out without making it obvious. Does that make sense? So I get pushed out of every job that I'm at. They can't legally fire me, so they don't fire me. They would just make it hell to where I quit and I would move on to something else. And that went on for at least six jobs, seven jobs. It got to the point where I finally said forget it, let's get a lawyer, let's get Social Security going. I'm obviously going to be retired for the rest of my life. I gave up.
Speaker 4:I got that depressed because I couldn't hold a job. I couldn't keep it. Ibd had taken my life away from me. I couldn't be a cop anymore. I had tried out for the state troopers. They failed me at the polygraph because they said it was inconclusive and that they couldn't read my polygraph test. So they had to deem it deceptive and they said come back in a year. Come to find out later from the investigator that they failed me for the ulcerative colitis because they didn't want me to be in pursuit of somebody and have either a flare up or need to use the restroom and then I either have an accident all over myself, have an accident on the suspect. You know what I mean. So, just, they didn't want something bad to happen, which is understandable, but that was my plan B. I got medically retired.
Speaker 4:My next step in life was I was going to become a state trooper, I was going to become an officer of some kind, I wanted to be in law enforcement. Well, that's when the depression spiraled and everything else happened. So, after the depression started and anxiety came because I quit dipping, I quit smoking, I quit everything, I quit drinking and I really quit drinking when I found out that the steroids had made me diabetic and I didn't know I was having hot flashes. I was passing out at work, I was. I felt I was having anxiety attacks because of the hot flashes and everything and I would run outside because I was working at CBE as a fraud prevention specialist and it had an outside patio area and it was during the winter, when I was six months of. It was during the winter and I went out there in New Braunfels and we had snow that year and I would literally lay on the bench and let the rain, the cold air, the snow, whatever it was, fall on me to cool me off. Because I was eating gummy bears. I was drinking Monster. I was vaping because I missed the habit, but it was. There was no nicotine, it was just the flavor, which I'm glad. I quit everything, I don't even do that anymore.
Speaker 4:So the day I found out I was diabetic, I finally went to my doctor's like, hey, this is happening. She's like, all right, well, let's do some blood work. I do some blood work the day I have a follow up on that blood work. I had a bowl of cereal and water. That's all I'd had that entire day. She did a pinprick finger prick, checked my blue-close levels. I was at 500, 496. And before she did that she had said well, we found out you're diabetic, your A1C is a 9.5. And I was like what 9.5? There's no way. My A1C was like five, six weeks ago and she's like, no, you have a 9.5. And she goes I'm sending you to the medication therapist doctor that's going to help prescribe, you know, your insulin and whatever else. So they put me on Bidurion and insulin when I had my surgery.
Speaker 4:In that three months in the hospital I spent it reset my system and I haven't been on any insulin or anything since 2019. And I've been able to control it and maintain it with my diet and I'm actually diabetes free. I was at a 5.5. So if I lost that 0.5, I'm no longer pre-diabetic. I always have it because I had it, but it's dormant. Unless I let my diet lax and I start eating drinking soda, eating all the bad candies and stuff again, then it'll come back. But as of right now, I'm no longer pre-diabetic. So I beat that. But the IBD gave that to me because of the steroids I had to take to control the IBD, which leads me to the last medical issue I had with it, I know right, and there's more, which leads me to the last medical issue I had with it, I know right, and there's more. I came down with heart failure because the steroids gave me diabetes, which affects your heart and everything else.
Speaker 4:My blood pressure meds were no longer working the way I thought they were and I had a quack for a doctor that said oh, 146 over 96 is normal. You're a big dude. You walked up the stairs from outside. 96 is normal, you're a big dude. You walked up the stairs from outside like this is normal blood pressure, you're fine. Yeah right, it overworked my heart for so long.
Speaker 4:So in 2019, I tried to do the law enforcement thing again. I finally got my. I took my depression, I grabbed it. I grabbed it. I said I'm going to make a change, I'm going to do something with my life and I'm going to make this change happen. I want to be a cop, so I applied for the police academy. I passed the exam. I couldn't pass the blood pressure. And then I'm doing my dishes and I have a pseudo heart attack but they called it a pseudo heart attack because it wasn't a heart attack, but it was a heart attack type thing. And anyways, five days in the hospital, tests and they say well, it's your hypertension. So I get on medication, therapy, 100% recovery. So I go from 285 pounds. When I start my recovery journey from the blood pressure, I go from 285 pounds down to 235 pounds in about eight months. So 2019, 2020 ish till about 2021.
Speaker 4:I didn't do shit. So from 2019, 2020-ish till about 2021, I didn't do shit. I sat on the chair and I actually did worse for my heart than if I had gotten up and tried to do something about it, because I got scared. My anxiety kicked in. I didn't want to die, I didn't want to overexert myself, didn't want to have a heart attack. I was like, oh my God, my life has stopped now. So that was that depression, all caused by the steroids which I had to take because of the IBD. So recover from that.
Speaker 4:And I was a school teacher. While I was in that I started out with subbing. Then I did long term sub and then I got my teaching certificate. But I had issues while I was doing that. I'd have to get support for my class so I could go use the restroom whatever, empty my bag, because I had a permanent bag at the time. It just made it awkward.
Speaker 4:And I had worked for a steel mill before I found out I was diabetic. So I was in the extreme heat, not realizing that it was diabetes that was making me feel that way, which is oh. And working in the steel plant is how I found out I had no abdominal wall. From the infection, I got a hernia in the like right under my ribs on the right side. I got a hernia in the center of my abdomen and when I went to go get it fixed, they couldn't fix anything because there was nothing to repair. So what they did is they took 25 inches of bio mesh and they strategically placed it on my what was left of my abdominal wall to reinforce it. So I have a mesh abdominal wall now.
Speaker 4:Hopefully my muscles are growing into that mesh and rebuilding itself, which was the plan. All caused from the IBD. But long story short, after I got done with teaching I went and worked in the jail. I went from 285 pounds down to 235, got my life back, went to go work for the jail. When I realized the jail wasn't going to sponsor us for the sheriff's department, I applied for the police academy again. I got in. Six months later I am now a Saghin police officer. That is my whole IBD journey.
Speaker 3:First off, thank you for your service and thank you for your story. Cheers to you to getting to where you are today.
Speaker 3:That is wow. There are times when I really just don't know what to say. And to say the first thing is is that you're a trail warrior for going through all of that and it's incredible. One of my biggest things I look at is like for us people going through IBD is you know, the indomitable spirit is so strong and it's so strong in you to go through every single thing you went through and facing death multiple times and all adversity, and now here you are and now your life is going in the direction that deserves to go into. So I'm really happy that now it's going the way that it deserves. From that you deserve to go through. I appreciate that.
Speaker 1:Yeah, that was quite the ride. That is like everything that possibly could have gone wrong went wrong, and I'm still boggled a bit by the fact that, like, somehow you're like the unlucky one that's just like no, not that it's like somehow you're the unlucky one that, like everything seemed to go. It's not like it's one thing goes wrong, it's like shit. If it's going to happen, it's going to happen to you.
Speaker 4:Yeah, the worst thing that happened that I forgot to mention during my big surgery, when they cut my anus out and they gave me a permanent bag. So the doctor had kept me under the knife for 12 and a half hours and gave me too much anesthesia. So, not being my first surgery, my body was no longer as strong as it used to be because I had other abdominal surgeries. So I don't know if it was the anesthesia, but something disassociated my, my neurological connection between my lungs, but I wasn't able to start breathing on my own the way I should have been. I was struggling with it, so they intubated me and they strapped me to a gurney with restraints and I woke up in ICU and that was probably the scariest thing. And then the ICU nurse is like yeah, dude, you almost died. You weren't breathing on your own. They had to intubate you and send you to ICU and hear you wait until you wake up.
Speaker 3:Yeah, Whoa oh my.
Speaker 1:God that is. God Well, and you know they talk about. There's very much trauma associated with when they have to intubate people, because of how traumatizing it is, because of having to be strapped down and having something breathe for you. That that is not. Your brain doesn't like it, your body doesn't like it.
Speaker 3:And something you're just not expecting to that just makes it all worse, like you're. Just you're thinking that it'll be not as bad, but then, like everything, just kind of hitting it at once. It's just the confusion you have, and it must have been so scary.
Speaker 4:Yeah, because you go to sleep and everything's fine, you know, aside from you getting a big ass surgery. And then you wake up and you're like what is in my mouth, what's down my throat, what is going on here? And like you're scared because you're just looking at a clock and a bunch of sound. You know sounds are going off inside the ICU and you can't move. You're like why can't I move? And you're like cause you got something stuck in your mouth and you can't so yeah.
Speaker 3:There's one thing I wanted to ask you. Cause this was? You know? You've mentioned this in the document you sent beforehand before you came on. The podcast talked about God, and I see you wear a cross too, and I wear one too, and one of the things that helped me, I have a strong faith in God, and is that something that helps you throughout all these years of going through IBD and your journey?
Speaker 4:So I grew up in the Southern Baptist Church and I have been up and down with my faith.
Speaker 4:I have lost my faith and found my faith and lost my faith and found my faith. So I found it again through my daughter, who we had never talked about God Because at the time I was I was struggling with it, I was following Norse paganism. And then, out of nowhere, my grandmother had given me a little figurine of Jesus Christ and it was by itself sitting up on a shelf and we had never talked about God or Jesus or anything to her Nobody. And she goes. She asked Mommy, daddy, is that Jesus? And I was like what, where did you hear that name? And then, magically, prince of Egypt. The cartoon was on TV and it was my daughter's favorite show. All she wanted to watch was Prince of Egypt. So we found our faith again.
Speaker 4:My wife got baptized when we moved to Texas. Everything was good. And then we moved out here to where I live now in Seguin, bought a house and then all that everything came crashing down again. We couldn't find a church because I'm not into the whole speaking in tongues. So I lost my faith again and I went back to Norse paganism, on into the whole speaking in tongues. So I lost my faith again and I went back to Norse paganism. And I really lost my faith after I almost died on the operating table after my big surgery and my wife went through a really bad depression and stint when I had this last surgery because I was in the hospital for so long so she kind of didn't come see me all the time. So I got lost again, lost my faith and for years, for four or five years, I denounced it and then I went to the police academy and I found my faith again in the police academy because for three months prior to that I had started getting religious stuff on my Facebook feed and my social media and I'm like, what the hell is this? You know I don't look up religious stuff. Why am I getting the gospel? Because I had broken down, I was scared of failure and it seemed like everything good that started in my life would be ripped away for some reason. Ever since I started denouncing my faith and said I was, ever since I got mad at God Right.
Speaker 4:So I'm in the police academy and I had already broken down to my wife on the way home one day because the PT was so hard with my bag and heart failure, recovery and everything I had so much against me that they looked at me as weak. So I had to prove myself. On top of being trying to keep up with 20 year old kids you know they eat. I'm 40 years old, I'm not 20 years old anymore Like it's hard to keep up. So and then, randomly, two guys in the academy talked to just randomly started talking to me about God one day. They just asked me, they just talked to me about it. I was like, yeah, I grew up in the, so this is me now. And they're like well, blah, blah, blah.
Speaker 4:And I went home and we all 12 of us came down with COVID, so they canceled class for a week. Well, I came, I came home and I was like babe, you know trying to say something. She stopped me and she goes look, I will go to church with you. She goes obviously, this is what you need. You need me to go with you. You're never going to go. You know what you want your answer.
Speaker 4:I found my faith through the academy because I knew I could not do it on my own and I was tired of having the things that happened in my life be ripped away. Ibd and all of my medical traumas caused by the IBD and then me trying to move forward in my life all combined is what brought me back to God, and I've never had a stronger faith because I know he wouldn't have put me strength to keep pushing and not make that quick fix to a long-term problem, you know, or a long-term solution to a short-term problem and things like that. So I honestly believe everything happens for a reason and yeah, so yes, to answer your question God is. He is my rock.
Speaker 3:I believe in that too, where everything happens for a reason, but it's also.
Speaker 3:I know a lot of people that go through those ups and downs and believing in faith, because some people do, some people don't. And I grew up Christian Armenian Orthodox and when I was in the hospital for weeks at a time, my mom, you know, she would bring holy water and before surgery she would like put it on my forehead, and at times I don't remember because I was so out of it. I think I pushed her hand away at one point because I was like why? And people question that but there are times when it comes back to you, like it did with the police academy and these other cadets coming to you too. And the fact that your wife supports you too with that, I think, is so vital as well. Saying like I'll go with you and to have a partner like that is as a great support system. You know, not everyone does, but that's something that helps you get through it too as well. It's these like pillars, like these pillars that help you get through the darkness.
Speaker 4:And you know how. I knew God was watching me in the hospital was there was a nurse and I can't remember her name. Knew God was watching me in the hospital was there was a nurse and I can't remember her name. She was an air force nurse and she would pray for me every day. I could hear her praying outside of my room and she gave me a card. She said hey, I know God has put you here for something greater than what you think you're dealing with now. It's just he and she was like this is going to make you stronger. So yeah, faith is a big part of dealing with IBD.
Speaker 1:You're no longer in the military, but you were 100% service-connected disability, so you're still able to get your care through the medical system. Is that right?
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:How does that work? How are you still able to see Dr Patel when, again, he is based on a military center? No-transcript.
Speaker 4:VA. If you can pay your copay, I'd suggest going to a civilian doctor, and if you do, because the VA is not a guaranteed specific doctor. Every time their doctors change, so you're not going to see the same doctor twice and when it comes to IBD, a relationship with your doctor is key.
Speaker 1:A hundred percent, yeah, yeah, no. And I think I mean there are some folks that you know are this is going to sound weird but luckier than you, and that they get a milder disease course, and so it is more manageable for them to go to a surgeon, go to a doctor that's less experienced. But there are definitely people that you know that's not the dice they roll, and you know, and so they do need somebody that's a lot more specialized. You know, I do know some people that they're like you know, you see they've, you know they go on some azathioprine and it kind of clears it up a little bit and they're kind of able to go about their lives. But that's the folks that we typically talk to, are the more like you who have a much more complicated disease course and really need to see somebody who is specialized.
Speaker 1:And sometimes what we tell the people too is, like you know, go to some of these folks, get a second opinion. They can oftentimes work with a community GI, somebody who's not as specialized in IBD, to help manage your case too, if you're not complicated. But but boy, brian, that's not you, that's definitely not you. So I'm glad you have, I have access to the right person as somebody who comes from the military system very mild, male dominated, suck it up, take a knee kind of side of things and you struggled with some really you know significant mental health struggles here. What did you do to sort of take that on?
Speaker 4:You know that's a hard one, and if I choke up don't you dare judge me.
Speaker 1:I don't know, I cry on the show all the time.
Speaker 4:So, man, I still deal with it. To be honest with you, I deal with it every day, between all of my medical traumas and my heart, everything accumulated into one whole and cutting all the vices out of my life. When I was studying Norse paganism, it was, it was my faith in in the old gods and the old ways, because I believe in crystals. Crystals do hold energies and hold powers, healing powers. Amethysts and obsidian, onyx, you know, amethyst centers you and creates balance. Onyx and obsidian help ward off negativity and bad thoughts. Selenite's a cleanser and then rose quartz brings love and faith into your body. And then so I. I have pocket stones that I keep. I have an obsidian stone. That's a thumb rub stone. It's, it's a rubbing that I keep and I keep them in my pocket every day. I got a selenite, a rose quartz, an amethyst and an obsidian stone that I keep in my pocket as close as possible to my skin. I use that.
Speaker 4:I refuse to take medication because the last time I took medication I wanted to kill myself. It does not work on me, it makes it worse. I didn't believe in mental illness. It's just not how it was raised. You were raised to get the hell over it. It's life, life's hard Deal with it. Face it head on. Nobody cares about your emotions, Nobody cares about how you're feeling, you just need God. And I'm not saying that negativity because I believe faith, love and hope are the key to conquering depression, anxiety and all your wins, anxiety and all your whims. The worst thing is the anxiety because now, whenever my body temperature changes, I get nauseous because I'm super hungry, my heart races a little bit, I drink too much caffeine, anything like that. I'm starting to catch the triggers and catch the symptoms, but really it's just telling yourself you're okay, having a strong support system. My wife has been key because there was one time I was driving and all of a sudden, out of nowhere, I got into a panic attack. And I had and I was doing a hundred miles an hour because I felt like I couldn't breathe, thought I was having a heart attack, thought I was dying. And it was a panic attack. And I go and I stopped at the Bucks gas station not Bucky's but Bucks in Laverne, texas, and I get out of my car real quick, my truck real quick. I just stand on the sidewalk in front of the store and I calm down because I'm around other people.
Speaker 4:The mental anguish comes the most when I'm alone because I didn't know I was dying again, like I was. The first time when I got diagnosed with ulcerative colitis, I didn't know that the J pouch was killing me and nobody knew it. None of my blood work was telling me I was infected when I had infecting and decaying tissue in my pelvis that had become septic. So now, whenever, like my nerves flare or anything like that, I get those jolts of different waves and frequencies in my body, it's really hard. It's hard to deal with it and I still deal with the anxiety and the panic attack. But I honestly could not have dealt with it without my faith, without my wife, without my kids. My family gives me strength. You need to know like being able to deal with it is knowing that you're not alone in the situation. And it took Dr Patel also Dr Patel, helping me with that, helping me understand that, hey, you're not alone, there's people out there.
Speaker 4:I've been this patient for 15 years and that's why I say you need a bond with your doctor to really help you through IBD, because it takes that and it's been a nightmare, it's been a roller coaster, but I'm not tooting my horn. I'm not the normal person. I've got a very strong will to live. I don't want to die. I'm okay with death. I understand it comes for everybody. I'm just I'm not ready to leave my family alone.
Speaker 4:So, no matter how bad my depression and anxiety gets, I will never succumb to it. I will always find a way to fight through it. But honestly, if I didn't have my wife or my mom or my grandmother to call on those days I had those panic attacks when I was alone or by myself, and then just to be on the phone with me and listen to me, it could have been a lot worse. I've called the ambulance a couple of times because I thought I was having a heart attack and dying. So yeah, but now I'm finally getting a grip on my anxiety. And I didn't have that grip until I found faith. Like I thought I had faith, thought I had been baptized, thought I was doing it going by the numbers. I did not know what faith was and what his love and my love for him were, until this year I've been saw it for the last eight months I can honestly say I've truly found my faith and a hundred percent understand it, and that's what helps me through.
Speaker 1:I'm really glad that you found that, because that is debilitating. It is debilitating and so scary.
Speaker 3:Brian said, say we have to wrap up. What's one piece of advice you would give to others going through their IBD journey right now?
Speaker 4:First thing would be to take a deep breath. Take a deep breath, slow your brain down, take one day at a time, not give up. It's not a life ender. It is a deep breath. Slow your brain down, take one day at a time, not give up. It's not a life ender. It is a life changer. But be willing to adapt with it so that you can overcome it and still live the life that you were given to live.
Speaker 4:Because if you hide from it or if you let the fear of it take control of your life, you will never live and you'll just you'll slowly die miserably because you will feel like you don't have a life anymore, like I did. And it will take you years to finally realize that you can still live a life of IBD that you had before. It just might mean you have to tell hey, I've got a bag, hey, I need to when I need to use the restroom, I need to use the restroom. I'm sorry, guys, but that's just the way my life is. Take it or leave it. You might lose friends, you might gain friends, but really, at the end of the day, take a breath, remember you're okay and never give up on yourself. Your body and your mind are stronger than you think. If you think you're broken, you will be broken. If you think you're fine, your body will heal itself over time.
Speaker 1:Thank you so much, brian, for sharing your story. I know that was not easy, so we really, really appreciate it and I think a lot of people will feel inspired by your story as well. So thank you so much for doing that. Thank you, matt, for coming on to co-host with me. I appreciate that as well. Thanks to everybody else for listening and cheers, guys.
Speaker 3:And have it Cheers, cheers to everyone, to you, brian.
Speaker 4:All right guys, this is Brian. I hope you enjoyed my story. If you just gave you hope yourself, please like, share, subscribe, review, do everything you can and help support them.
