My Parallel Life
My Parallel Life
Episode 3: Daniel Cuts Class in the Most Conspicuous Way Possible
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Daniel works out a plan to cut class at Easton High — and it's not awkward at all. But when he travels back to his perfect life, he discovers something strange and unnerving.
Written by Vera Greentea and Jasmine Brown. Co-produced with Mike Umile. Music by aBird. Art by Silvan Borer.
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Transcript of:
MY PARALLEL LIFE
SEASON 1, EPISODE 3
Daniel Cuts Class in the Most Conspicuous Way Possible
By Jasmine Brown and Vera Greentea
THEME MUSIC: PATAGONIA NIGHTS BY ABIRD
RECORDER CLICKS ON
DANIEL: You know, most kids consider it uncool to be driven to school by their parents.
TYRONE: I thought you weren’t like most kids.
DANIEL: I’m not. I have a harder time making new friends and thus, I have more to lose by these kind of displays.
TYRONE: Well, maybe you should have thought of that before
DANIEL: Dad! I’m fine. I didn’t join a gang. I didn’t get jumped. I was exploring the city, and got lost and unfortunately, my phone died. That’s it. I told you.
TYRONE: It was careless, son. More than careless. You have no idea how it feels to not know where your child- damnit, Daniel, you’re a child. You can’t do things like that. How am I supposed to trust you to take care of yourself? It’s just you and me now. You have to be responsible.
DANIEL: ... OK.
TYRONE: OK?
DANIEL: OK.
TYRONE: (SIGHS) Just be home by five.
DANIEL: I know.
DOOR OPENS
TYRONE: (CALLING OUT) And charge your phone! The batteries for your tape recorder should not be your first priority!
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RECORDER CLICKS ON
STUDENTS SPEAKING IN BACKGROUND
DANIEL: (WHISPERING) I’m in the computer lab for Free Period, waiting for Mr. Gordon. I hope he’s quick because I’ve spent the last two days investigating how to cut class - there’s less articles on cutting on the library computer than you’d think - and Free Period seems to be my best bet. Of course Mr. Gordon wants to meet now--
MR. GORDON: Daniel.
DANIEL: Um, y-! Shit- y-sorry. Good afternoon, Mr. Gordon.
MR. GORDON: I thought it might be a good time to follow up on the three articles you and your crew wanted to pitch. Are the others coming?
DANIEL: Who? Jorge?
MR. GORDON: I thought there were more of you in the room?
DANIEL: Um, sure, but there are only two of us who maybe might write something.
MR. GORDON: So, what are you writing?
DANIEL: Oh! Well, Jorge and I have been researching… w-it’s kind of hard to explain but there’s, um, all this local street art and there’s been some disappearances in uh, Portugal. I mean. Not just Portugal. Here too. Probably.
MR. GORDON: Alright...sort of...an investigation on homeless youth culture and whether the authorities properly document crimes against them?
DANIEL: YES. That.
MR. GORDON: Okay...well, look. That kind of thing is what got you here and there’s definitely room for the...political in the paper. But let’s remember that we’re still trying to sell this project as something...vital and exciting to the student body. And the administration. Keep it simple. For instance, the English Department is sponsoring a Book Drive.
DANIEL: YES. That’s my second idea. The Book Drive.
MR. GORDON: Well... good. I was going to... you were gonna to be assigned that one anyways. Anything else?
DANIEL: Uhhh... the lunch menu?
MR. GORDON: Daniel, have you been working on this at all?
DANIEL: Of course I have! It’s just...um. There’s really only me. I thought more people might join.
MR. GORDON: You have Jorge.
DANIEL: Yes, me and Jorge. It’s… a lot.
MR. GORDON: I understand that. But this is your project, Daniel. I know you want to inspire student engagement but it has to start with you. No one is gonna join the newspaper if you don’t show them that a newspaper is worthwhile.
DANIEL: I understand. It is. I promise.
MR. GORDON: OK. Well. I’ll leave you to it.
SOUND OF FOOTSTEPS
DOOR OPENING AND QUICKLY CLOSING
DANIEL: (IN A LOW VOICE) Shit. That sucked. But I might not be in this school for too long, anyway, so... back to the plan. It feels crappy to a disappoint a teacher. But anyway. Operation: Jailbreak is a go. I’m just waiting a few more minutes and then I head towards the back of the building where I saw the Weeds the other day. That exit is typically unguarded, but if I run into interference, I’ll just head towards the bathrooms before circling back. I have my trusty pack of tools - a pick… which I’ll have to learn how to use if the door is locked by some chance, a dark hat, which...will help disguise my identity from the security camera and of course, yes, dad, a charger. From everything I’ve seen about this school, it’s much harder to get in than get out but… you never know. Cutting class is a serious thing and I don’t do it lightly. (WHISPERS NOW) I have to be very careful to not be caught.
PORTER: Hey.
DANIEL: (STARTLED) AGH! SHIT! What are you doing here?
PORTER: I go to school here. Why are you wearing that weirdo hat? Are you trying to stick up a liquor store?
DANIEL: No. I… it’s cold out.
PORTER: Yeahhh. But you wouldn’t be going outside for a few hours, right? Cause there’s two more periods and then you have your famous Newspaper Club.
DANIEL: No one calls it a newspaper club.
PORTER: But you’ll be there, right? You wouldn’t like, leave and make Jorge do all the work? Because, I know you would sit in the room while he writes about graffiti or whatever while you google “how to cut class” in plain sight but, you know, I assume, you wouldn’t actually have the balls to just leave.
DANIEL: Porter… I… there are things going on that just… aren’t your business, OK?
PORTER: Mhm. We’ll see.
DANIEL: I… have to go to the bathroom.
PORTER: So what… you’re waiting for a hall pass?
SOUNDS OF DANIEL LEAVING
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DANIEL: So escaping school… was easier than I thought. Even with that rando Weed kid who keeps grilling my face. But, I’m finally here, about to enter my very own Goosebumps story and stay there this time. My old room, my mom, Lola, here I come.
SOUNDS OF DOOR OPENING
BUZZING, WHISPERING, FOOTSTEPS THROUGHOUT
DANIEL: The stank of coming home. I mean seriously. This tunnel needs to air out. I think it’s even worse than the other day, if that’s possible. Whatever, it’s worth it. There’s some weird buzzing here this time, like a fly got in here with me? I hope it’s not a bee, that’s all I need right now. And what am I stepping on, let me shine a li-- EW! Well, I wish I hadn’t ‘a done that. It’s a fuck ton of dead bugs, so that seems kosher. Creepy tunnel full of dead exoskeletons leading to my room. At least, I hope they’re dead… and they’re not the ones buzzing. Maybe this is a mystery I should not investigate. God, this whole thing… is it - is it dumb that I keep coming through this tunnel? This thing seems fucked up and dangerous… but, on the other side, it’s my mom. My mom who is the way she always was. Maybe I should make a pact with myself - if it gets too dangerous in here, I’ll stop using the tunnel. Right? That’s me being responsible… ish. Oh, there’s the light to my room.
SOUNDS OF DOOR OPENING
BUZZING/WHISPERING ENDS
DANIEL: Ahhh. My old room. Man, I had such a sweet set-up. My new room is the size of my old bathroom. I miss my old stuff.
PATAGONIA NIGHTS PLAYS
DANIEL: My 42-inch TV over my queen-size bed (KISSY NOISE), six bookcases of books… now I only have two shelves and a twin bed. I don’t get it, are we that poor now or does my dad just really have crappy taste in furnishings?
SOUNDS OF OPENING UP A DESKTOP COMPUTER
DANIEL: And lemme just check the computer ...yep. Same date. Same time. 1:39 PM. This is so weird. Uhhh… actually. I should be in school right now here too. Shit. Am I gonna get in trouble for cutting here too? Well, it’s almost 2 o’clock and this was always the time when Lo and I would have our Independent Study Newspaper Work Class, so if I just show up, maybe no one will care. They trust us at Paulson.
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STUDENTS TYPING/TALKING
LOLA: Daniel! There you are! You’re really late!
DANIEL: Um, it’s 2 minutes after--
LOLA: Yeah, well, still. Check out this freakin’ mess I’m editing.
MUSIC FADES OUT
LOLA: (VOICE IN A WHISPER) It’s Julia’s movie review about some supernatural movie she watched over the weekend.... is there a lower form of art?
DANIEL: (LAUGHS) Well, reviews are the lowest form of journalism, so…
LOLA: And the grammar here-- okay, whatever. Let’s talk about your article. Do you have anything for me?
DANIEL: Um, well, I-I’ve been doing some research about uh, homeless youth culture and whether they receive adequate protection from the authorities.
LOLA: Oh. Cool! That will pair up very well with my LGBT abuse and abandonment piece!
DANIEL: Right! So I could work on that. Or the weekly lunch menu.
LOLA: HA HA HA! Shut up! But seriously, can you write that up by the end of this session? Five paragraphs would work.
DANIEL: Got it, chief! (PAUSE) Hey, Lo...I probably don’t say it enough but… you really do a great job on this paper. Look at all the people here, typing away and working hard on their columns, getting the paper out every Thursday. I really feel like… I couldn’t do it without you. It’s like… you make everyone around you want to do their best… to be their best. So… thanks… is what I’m saying. I guess.
LOLA: Uh… thanks and back atcha, headcase. But you just wasted 4 minutes of writing time.
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BIRDS TWEETING, CARS PASSING THROUGHOUT
DANIEL: You’re coming over, right?
LOLA: Nah, can’t today. I have that group project I still have to finish. You’re so lucky you got paired up with Charity and Arnold. They always share the work. I got Dennis and I haven’t even seen him since we got paired up! Probably in his garage, washing his new car for the tenth time this month. Probably shirtless. Probably wet?
DANIEL: Sell it to me harder how much you don’t like that, Lola.
LOLA: (LAUGHING) Shut up, Daniel! I have to go meet him, so I’ll see you tomorrow?
DANIEL: Yeah! Um, anyway, thanks for not saying anything about me cutting class. I know that’s not something you’d normally approve of.
LOLA: What? What are you talking about?
DANIEL: I was...you know, when I- when I came into the newspaper? I’m really digging myself deeper, huh? You didn’t notice me missing for a few periods? I thought that’s what your crack about me being late was.
LOLA: … Daniel. I don’t say this lightly… you are being a mega nerd. A twenty minute bathroom break between your last period and our club doesn’t constitute cutting. Put on your big boy pants.
DANIEL: I was in school all day? Really? What did I do, exactly?
LOLA: Um, yes? Unless I dreamed you. Uh, not - not that I would- why are you being so freakish?
DANIEL: No, no, no. Yeah, no, I remember now. Sorry, I was just thinking about the article.
LOLA: Oh yeah, that was awesome work. Probably some of the best stuff you’ve ever written. It’s too bad it goes into the one newspaper edition and then no one will ever see it again. Newspapers are the worst that way. Oh, check it out, it’s my street. See you tomorrow, Danny.
DANIEL: Yeah… bye.
PAUSE, BIRDS STILL CHIRPING
DANIEL: I hope this is still-yeah, it’s recording. Do you hear that, Lola? It’s you Or… not you? Apparently there is a not me. You-she-definitely saw a not me. So, assuming this is not some elaborate ruse… which hasn’t been entirely ruled out...I have a doppelganger here. Do we trade places? Oh… but dad in… in my shittier life… he said I was missing there. So, what’s the deal? Shit, someone’s home.
DOOR OPENING
DANIEL: Mom! It smells great in here!
ELEANOR: Danny boy! Where’s your other half?
DANIEL: Group project or something. Just me today.
ELEANOR: Too bad for her, I made enough lasagna to go around and around. With spinach and ricotta. Her favorite.
DANIEL: I’ll take a pic for her. She’ll have to live on the memory.
ELEANOR: (LAUGHS) How was school today, hon? Newspaper ran long today, didn’t it? You’re usually home an hour earlier.
DANIEL: (PANICKED) It’s 5 o’clock?
ELEANOR: 5:30.
DANIEL: Oh shit shit, I have to get home!
ELEANOR: Home? What do you call this place?
DANIEL: Doesn’t Suck. I mean, I got to get to my room and uh, get changed. See you at dinner!
ELEANOR: (IN THE DISTANCE) Since when--
RUSH OF FOOTSTEPS UPSTAIRS
DANIEL: Got to get home before Dad does! Spent too much time here.
CLOSET DOOR OPENING
TUNNEL NOISES: WHISPERING ETC
DANIEL: Do not need him having anxiety attack all over the neighborhood. And how weird that Lola thought I was in Paulson all day, but I was actually in Easton… is there really another me covering my tracks in the life that doesn’t suck? And no one to cover me in my own shitty version of my life? Tunnel, how the hell do you work? Oh, I need to change the batteries in this thing, too. There’s not enough light for this--
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RECORDER CLICKS ON
PATAGONIA NIGHTS PLAYS
DANIEL: I was thinking I should get more into what the tunnel looks like. It’s a sort of a cave-diving expedition, but without the diving. That sounds dramatic, but the tunnel is pitch-black and really uneven to walk on. Because of the darkness, it feels claustrophobic even with a flashlight on. I tried the one on my phone at first and then I got a real one from our Emergency Kit. It didn’t help much. Anyway, because of that boxed in feeling I end up sort of crouching as I inch through, but I’ve found that I can actually stand tall and not hit my head. So, we know the tunnel is at least over five foot eight.
DANIEL: It’s so… odd at how extravagantly nice the door is… and how horrible it is once I’m inside. It’s like the architect was so proud of this one feature and completely forgot to design the inside… which is a primordially gross hole poked through a cold mountain on an unmarked, untouched piece of land.But… I mean… someone must have made this tunnel… right? Tunnels that lead you into your old life don’t just appear in Pennsylvania… or do they?
DOOR OPENING
TYRONE: DANIEL! You in there?
DANIEL: Oh, hey, dad. Yeah.
TYRONE: (SIGHS EXHAUSTEDLY) Man, it’s been a long day. This poor mom is usually on top of it, but this time she bought a yogurt and forgot to read all the ingredients… she’s been pretty harried lately with her own-- well anyway. Her kid had a terrible allergic reaction, and we had to change the formula on her tubing… it’s been that kind of-- and every time that happens, the official rule is that I have to reteach the parent how to feed the patient. She barely had the piece of mind to withstand the lecture. It’s so tough when you’re the one messing up your own child… and you know it. I’m sorry Daniel, I know you’re having a hard time adjusting… and me yelling at you won’t help the situation…
DANIEL: Dad… it’s fine. You’re not the one that should be apologizing. You stayed.
TYRONE: (SIGHS) It’s not like that, son. Your mom is doing something incredible right now. She didn’t run off to have some fling. Did you know that she dreamed of joining Doctors Without Borders way before I even met her? She has such a huge heart. And when she had you and Abby… she was so happy. She was so happy that I almost felt guilty. She gave her whole heart to you both, and to me. But you’re both practically adults and -- and you know, it was my idea that she revisit her dream. Her dream to help those who have no opportunities. I always respected and loved that part of her. I know it’s hard for you to understand at this moment, but you should be proud of her, even if you’re angry too. She didn’t abandon you. She’s still your mom who loves you so much.
DANIEL: I’m not a- (SIGHS) You really don’t see me as an adult, do you? You flipped a shit that I didn’t come home in time and… you’re pretending now. I know mom is doing something special. I know mom is special. And maybe Abby already had enough of a perfect childhood as a little precocious princess that she can compartmentalize but… mom went off to do something amazing without us and she couldn’t wait until I didn’t need her… until you. Look, I’m not saying I would want to have gone to Ecuador but… if we were…If she was who I thought she was...why didn’t you go together in two years? You’re separated. You’re… you’re divorcing. And it sucks. So stop acting like it’s fine. It’s not fine. And I’m not stupid.
TYRONE: OK.
DANIEL: OK?
TYRONE: OK.
DANIEL: ...can we order lasagna for dinner?
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RECORDER CLICKS ON
DANIEL: So, I’ve made a spreadsheet. Obviously you can’t see my spreadsheet but, uh, basically until I figure out what’s going on, I’m gonna try to optimize my visits. Um. Here’s what I know. When I leave this… shitty version of my life… mm, Shitty Life, my dad misses me. There is no doppelganger here to cover for me. I can’t just freak my dad out, so I need to visit the world through the tunnel… the world that doesn’t suck, when he’s at work. Hmm. But also, when Mom is home, so I can see her. Before quitting the hospital and going to freakin’ Ecuador, she’d go there around 6pm. My dad comes home here at anywhere between 6:30pm & 12am… So, my most optimal path is to leave school at 3 and rush to the tunnel for 3 hours, then go home… oh, but, then there’s the newspaper. Not only did that Porter kid make it very clear that he noticed me leaving...I really wish I never got involved with these… Weeds… where’s a good reliable Lola when you need her? But Mr. Gordon expects me to be actually working on the newspaper I was so gung-ho about starting.
DANIEL: Maybe… Maybe I can hand in my article, give Jorge a task, and leave by 3:15… and tomorrow, I already have an article for tomorrow. They don’t need to know that I wrote the homeless youth article for Paulson. And Lo will be so impressed if she knew my writing was reaching double the audience. ...I wish I could show Lola all this… maybe once I figure it all out a bit better. She really didn’t like me coming in half baked the other day.
DANIEL: Still, I think I’m gonna to loop her in on this eventually. Hopefully. When it starts making sense. Everyone else, my mom and dad and Abby and whoever else...I think it will freak them out too much. But Lola... if I can get a handle on this and come at her with something that makes sense, I think we can solve this together. She always has my back.
PATAGONIA NIGHTS FADES IN
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TIM: My Parallel Life is written and produced by Vera Greentea and Jasmine Brown. The audio for this podcast is recorded and mixed by Mike Umile. Music is created and performed by aBIRD. My Parallel Life stars LC Witter, Julian Thomas, Shiree Nicholas Christopher, Steph Marie Alvarez, Louis Walker, Jayme Face, Timothy Rodriguez, Rajiv Miller, Siera Louis Gene and Jasmine Brown. Website and credits are by Timothy Rodriguez.
To learn more about My Parallel Life and the fantastic crew of people who make it, visit our website: jumpycatstudios.com. If you’d like to help us spread the word, please give us a five star review and tell your friends to subscribe at any major podcast platform. This episode’s a wrap, see you in another dimension!