Narcissism originates from people not having been valued for who they are. They have typically been loved or appreciated for a role they perform or results they provide. This presents relational challenges for them and the people they are close to.
I typically recommend Wendy Behary's book Disarming the Narcissist to help partners and family members. This book will help you understand and become creative so relationships have a better chance of heading in a healthier direction.
Wendy is the founder and director of The Cognitive Therapy Center of New Jersey and The Schema Therapy Institutes of NJ-NYC and DC.
She has been treating clients, training professionals and supervising psychotherapists for more than 20 years. She is also on the faculty of the Cognitive Therapy Center and Schema Therapy Institute of New York, where she has trained and worked with Dr. Jeffrey Young since 1989. Wendy is a founding fellow (and supervisor) of The Academy of Cognitive Therapy (Dr. Aaron T. Beck). She was also the President of the International Society of Schema Therapy (ISST) from 2010-2014.
Wendy Behary has co-authored several chapters and articles on Schema Therapy and Cognitive Therapy. She is the author of “Disarming the Narcissist…Surviving and Thriving with the Self-Absorbed” (New Harbinger Publications—2008 & 2013). Now translated in 10 languages. Wendy has a specialty in treating narcissists and the people who live with and deal with them. As an author and an expert on the subject of narcissism, she is a contributing chapter author of several chapters on Schema Therapy for narcissism (Wiley and APA Press, 2011, 2012, 2013). She lectures both nationally and internationally to professional and general audiences on the subject of Schema Therapy, and the subject of narcissism, relationships, and dealing with difficult people. Her work with industry has included speaking engagements focused on interpersonal conflict resolution.
Her private practice is primarily devoted to treating narcissists, partners/people dealing with them, and couples experiencing relationship problems. She is also an expert in coaching individuals in interviewing, public speaking, and interpersonal skills enhancement.
You can learn more about Wendy and her work at the website https://disarmingthenarcissist.com/