{"version":"1.0.0","segments":[{"speaker":"Theme Song: Therapy Roulette","startTime":5.49,"endTime":8.55,"body":"Consent to Vent / Trauma"},{"speaker":"Theme Song: Therapy Roulette","startTime":8.55,"endTime":12.99,"body":"disguised as comedy / Therapy"},{"speaker":"Theme Song: Therapy Roulette","startTime":8.55,"endTime":12.99,"body":"Roulette: Consent to Vent / If"},{"speaker":"Theme Song: Therapy Roulette","startTime":12.99,"endTime":15.48,"body":"you dont have problems, then"},{"speaker":"Theme Song: Therapy Roulette","startTime":12.99,"endTime":15.48,"body":"youre likely repressing sh*t"},{"speaker":"Theme Song: Therapy Roulette","startTime":15.48,"endTime":20.91,"body":"and you should find a therapist"},{"speaker":"Theme Song: Therapy Roulette","startTime":15.48,"endTime":20.91,"body":"/ (Whos not me)"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":21.33,"endTime":26.13,"body":"Hey, Rouletters."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":21.33,"endTime":26.13,"body":"I'm back with another episode of"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":26.16,"endTime":30.06,"body":"your favorite podcast Therapy"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":26.16,"endTime":30.06,"body":"Roulette: consent to vent! My"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":30.06,"endTime":35.25,"body":"name is Michele Baci, and I miss"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":30.06,"endTime":35.25,"body":"doing stand up comedy. It's been"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":35.25,"endTime":40.8,"body":"a year. And I think I had a big"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":35.25,"endTime":40.8,"body":"show in February of last year."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":40.8,"endTime":44.28,"body":"So I remember going into the"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":40.8,"endTime":44.28,"body":"quarantine coming down from a"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":44.28,"endTime":47.82,"body":"high like I had performed at the"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":44.28,"endTime":47.82,"body":"Comedy Store. And I felt really"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":47.82,"endTime":51.3,"body":"good about it. And just"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":47.82,"endTime":51.3,"body":"performing it all at the Comedy"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":51.3,"endTime":54.51,"body":"Store had been a big goal for"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":51.3,"endTime":54.51,"body":"me, and I had just gotten my"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":54.54,"endTime":59.91,"body":"foot in the door there. And then"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":54.54,"endTime":59.91,"body":"the world went on lockdown. And"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":60.0,"endTime":65.25,"body":"I have kind of replaced stand up"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":60.0,"endTime":65.25,"body":"with podcasting. Because"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":65.25,"endTime":69.69,"body":"podcasting is not totally"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":65.25,"endTime":69.69,"body":"different because I am, I am"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":69.69,"endTime":74.85,"body":"just spilling my thoughts into a"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":69.69,"endTime":74.85,"body":"microphone. But it is ever so"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":74.85,"endTime":79.68,"body":"slightly different because I'm"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":74.85,"endTime":79.68,"body":"just talking to me. And you're"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":79.68,"endTime":82.68,"body":"listening, but I don't know who"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":79.68,"endTime":82.68,"body":"you are. So you're a ghost"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":83.13,"endTime":83.85,"body":"listener."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":85.02,"endTime":88.62,"body":"I miss like the challenge and"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":85.02,"endTime":88.62,"body":"the hardship that comes with"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":88.62,"endTime":94.08,"body":"doing stand up like the really"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":88.62,"endTime":94.08,"body":"grungy grime Enos to it, and"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":94.53,"endTime":100.2,"body":"it's like, working out at the"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":94.53,"endTime":100.2,"body":"gym. But you really don't know"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":100.56,"endTime":104.37,"body":"what results you're getting."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":100.56,"endTime":104.37,"body":"Until someone laughs And as"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":104.37,"endTime":107.82,"body":"you're practicing, or working"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":104.37,"endTime":107.82,"body":"out new material, you really"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":107.82,"endTime":113.04,"body":"don't get laughs So it's like a"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":107.82,"endTime":113.04,"body":"thankless exercise. And I kind"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":113.04,"endTime":118.92,"body":"of miss that challenging,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":113.04,"endTime":118.92,"body":"masochistic thing I was doing to"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":118.92,"endTime":121.08,"body":"myself a year ago, I miss it."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":122.55,"endTime":125.37,"body":"In today's episode, I talked to"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":122.55,"endTime":125.37,"body":"another stand up so it got me"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":125.37,"endTime":130.5,"body":"thinking about it. Because I"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":125.37,"endTime":130.5,"body":"know I've been sad. And I'm"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":130.53,"endTime":133.83,"body":"feeling more useless in"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":130.53,"endTime":133.83,"body":"quarantine without having stand"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":133.83,"endTime":136.98,"body":"up. Because it's really where I"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":133.83,"endTime":136.98,"body":"was directing my career. I was"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":136.98,"endTime":140.01,"body":"like, oh, I'll, I'll get really"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":136.98,"endTime":140.01,"body":"good at stand up. And then you"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":140.01,"endTime":144.0,"body":"know, whatever comes after that"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":140.01,"endTime":144.0,"body":"comes after that. So I was"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":144.0,"endTime":149.67,"body":"focusing on stand up comedy a"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":144.0,"endTime":149.67,"body":"year ago. And since then, I've"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":149.76,"endTime":155.13,"body":"become focused on keeping my"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":149.76,"endTime":155.13,"body":"house in order. That's been"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":155.13,"endTime":158.79,"body":"really hard. I'm not doing well"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":155.13,"endTime":158.79,"body":"with that. I've been focused on"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":159.06,"endTime":162.3,"body":"growing my relationship with my"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":159.06,"endTime":162.3,"body":"boyfriend and we are getting"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":162.99,"endTime":165.45,"body":"where I think we're at full"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":162.99,"endTime":165.45,"body":"growth right now, like the"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":165.45,"endTime":169.2,"body":"relationship is pretty strong."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":165.45,"endTime":169.2,"body":"Just because I spent all my time"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":169.2,"endTime":175.2,"body":"with him. So it's hard not to"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":169.2,"endTime":175.2,"body":"focus on that. And I've gotten a"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":175.2,"endTime":180.75,"body":"decent job to fell by my Monday"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":175.2,"endTime":180.75,"body":"through Friday with so the job"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":180.75,"endTime":185.01,"body":"is good. But it's not like the"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":180.75,"endTime":185.01,"body":"dream. The dream is something"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":185.01,"endTime":188.07,"body":"creative, something related to"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":185.01,"endTime":188.07,"body":"writing, or comedy or"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":188.07,"endTime":192.33,"body":"entertainment. So the dream has"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":188.07,"endTime":192.33,"body":"been put on pause. And I'm a"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":192.33,"endTime":195.24,"body":"podcaster, which is cool. I've"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":192.33,"endTime":195.24,"body":"always wanted to do a podcast."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":195.27,"endTime":200.13,"body":"So this is a different dream."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":195.27,"endTime":200.13,"body":"And I think learning to adapt"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":200.64,"endTime":205.47,"body":"and change with what the"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":200.64,"endTime":205.47,"body":"environments demanding of you is"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":205.47,"endTime":210.06,"body":"good. I think I've tapped into"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":205.47,"endTime":210.06,"body":"my resiliency. And I'm glad it's"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":210.06,"endTime":213.75,"body":"carried me this far. And I don't"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":210.06,"endTime":213.75,"body":"know what do you guys think of"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":213.75,"endTime":217.29,"body":"Therapy Roulette, send me an"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":213.75,"endTime":217.29,"body":"email, let me know your thoughts"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":217.29,"endTime":220.65,"body":"on the podcast, actually write a"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":217.29,"endTime":220.65,"body":"review, and I will read them"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":220.68,"endTime":224.85,"body":"through the review. So I created"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":220.68,"endTime":224.85,"body":"a new link, where you can leave"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":224.85,"endTime":229.14,"body":"me a review. It's called rate"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":224.85,"endTime":229.14,"body":"this podcast dot com slash"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":229.14,"endTime":233.49,"body":"therapy. And that's my own link"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":229.14,"endTime":233.49,"body":"for Therapy Roulette. Again,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":233.49,"endTime":239.37,"body":"it's rate this podcast.com slash"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":233.49,"endTime":239.37,"body":"therapy. If you leave the review"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":239.37,"endTime":242.7,"body":"there, it'll go to a couple"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":239.37,"endTime":242.7,"body":"different platforms. So it won't"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":242.7,"endTime":245.58,"body":"just land on Apple podcasts,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":242.7,"endTime":245.58,"body":"it'll go to a couple other"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":246.33,"endTime":249.51,"body":"podcast platforms, which will be"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":246.33,"endTime":249.51,"body":"really good because apparently,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":249.87,"endTime":256.11,"body":"not everyone has an iPhone. So"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":249.87,"endTime":256.11,"body":"this will help people who have"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":256.2,"endTime":259.59,"body":"different ways of listening to"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":256.2,"endTime":259.59,"body":"podcasts, hear about Therapy"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":259.59,"endTime":263.19,"body":"Roulette, get the word out that"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":259.59,"endTime":263.19,"body":"mental health is something we"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":263.19,"endTime":267.09,"body":"should be talking about laughing"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":263.19,"endTime":267.09,"body":"about, you know, it shouldn't be"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":267.09,"endTime":270.9,"body":"such a dark cloud that we can't"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":267.09,"endTime":270.9,"body":"access. So it'll help us D"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":270.9,"endTime":276.21,"body":"stigmatize trauma, mental"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":270.9,"endTime":276.21,"body":"health, and all that bad shit"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":276.21,"endTime":278.82,"body":"that's happened to you. It'll"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":276.21,"endTime":278.82,"body":"help you talk about it. So leave"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":278.82,"endTime":281.58,"body":"your review. If you want to do"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":278.82,"endTime":281.58,"body":"it the old school way."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":281.58,"endTime":285.27,"body":"Definitely. You can do that too."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":281.58,"endTime":285.27,"body":"on Apple podcasts or wherever"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":285.27,"endTime":288.57,"body":"you're listening to this. I"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":285.27,"endTime":288.57,"body":"appreciate it. If you want to"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":288.57,"endTime":291.72,"body":"lend me five stars and say"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":288.57,"endTime":291.72,"body":"something super nice. The more"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":291.72,"endTime":295.8,"body":"so the better. Maybe I'll even"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":291.72,"endTime":295.8,"body":"read your review on air."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":297.06,"endTime":300.09,"body":"Try to make it funny. Why don't"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":297.06,"endTime":300.09,"body":"you on today"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":300.09,"endTime":305.34,"body":"This episode, I talked to a"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":300.09,"endTime":305.34,"body":"stand up comic Dave. And we talk"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":305.34,"endTime":310.77,"body":"about an eating disorder that he"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":305.34,"endTime":310.77,"body":"struggled with. So throwing that"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":310.77,"endTime":312.93,"body":"out there in case that's"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":310.77,"endTime":312.93,"body":"triggering to you,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":314.01,"endTime":316.86,"body":"but he's really done a lot of"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":314.01,"endTime":316.86,"body":"work on himself to overcome"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":316.86,"endTime":320.7,"body":"that. And it was fascinating to"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":316.86,"endTime":320.7,"body":"hear his story. He also has a"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":321.0,"endTime":325.65,"body":"TEDx talk, which I'll link to in"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":321.0,"endTime":325.65,"body":"the show notes. I watched it, it"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":325.65,"endTime":328.68,"body":"was very powerful. He talks"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":325.65,"endTime":328.68,"body":"about different stuff in the"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":328.95,"endTime":332.04,"body":"TEDx talk than we did in the"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":328.95,"endTime":332.04,"body":"conversations you if you want to"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":332.04,"endTime":336.51,"body":"hear more of Dave, check out his"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":332.04,"endTime":336.51,"body":"talk, and some shameless self"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":336.51,"endTime":340.2,"body":"promotion for Therapy Roulette."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":336.51,"endTime":340.2,"body":"Before I dive into the"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":340.23,"endTime":343.32,"body":"interview, check out my YouTube"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":340.23,"endTime":343.32,"body":"channel. I'm posting more"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":343.32,"endTime":347.79,"body":"YouTube videos. It's a lot of"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":343.32,"endTime":347.79,"body":"the video interview right now."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":348.12,"endTime":351.18,"body":"Usually, I get that up by"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":348.12,"endTime":351.18,"body":"Monday. So if you want to watch"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":351.21,"endTime":355.23,"body":"Dave's interview, in video,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":351.21,"endTime":355.23,"body":"check it out Monday on the"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":355.23,"endTime":359.31,"body":"YouTube channel. It's Therapy"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":355.23,"endTime":359.31,"body":"Roulette. Subscribe on YouTube,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":359.46,"endTime":363.42,"body":"subscribe to the podcast. Follow"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":359.46,"endTime":363.42,"body":"me everywhere I want to be"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":363.42,"endTime":368.22,"body":"followed. All my info again is"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":363.42,"endTime":368.22,"body":"down in the show notes. I'd like"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":368.22,"endTime":373.35,"body":"to welcome to the podcast stand"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":368.22,"endTime":373.35,"body":"up comic performer author Dave"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":373.35,"endTime":374.13,"body":"Chawner."},{"speaker":"Theme Song","startTime":374.19,"endTime":377.49,"body":"guest interview / a"},{"speaker":"Theme Song","startTime":374.19,"endTime":377.49,"body":"friend for you / strangers whose"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":374.49,"endTime":376.59,"body":"welcome back to an"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":374.49,"endTime":376.59,"body":"ther episode of Therapy Roule"},{"speaker":"te","startTime":376.59,"endTime":380.88,"body":"consent to vent! my name is"},{"speaker":"te","startTime":376.59,"endTime":380.88,"body":"Michele Baci, it is raining ou"},{"speaker":"te","startTime":377.49,"endTime":380.97,"body":"issues are relatable / guest"},{"speaker":"te","startTime":377.49,"endTime":380.97,"body":"interview / They're the voice"},{"speaker":"te","startTime":380.88,"endTime":384.09,"body":"side in Los Angeles, if you ca"},{"speaker":"te","startTime":380.88,"endTime":384.09,"body":"hear that on the microphone. I'"},{"speaker":"te","startTime":380.97,"endTime":383.7,"body":"that's new / this person has"},{"speaker":"te","startTime":380.97,"endTime":383.7,"body":"problems and they don't mind"},{"speaker":"te","startTime":383.7,"endTime":387.6,"body":"discussing it, but they still"},{"speaker":"te","startTime":383.7,"endTime":387.6,"body":"need a therapist / (Whos not"},{"speaker":"te","startTime":384.39,"endTime":387.81,"body":"here with my guest today Da"},{"speaker":"te","startTime":384.39,"endTime":387.81,"body":"e shorter. He is a stand up co"},{"speaker":"te","startTime":387.6,"endTime":389.04,"body":"me)"},{"speaker":"te","startTime":387.81,"endTime":392.37,"body":"ic, a presenter performer and an"},{"speaker":"te","startTime":387.81,"endTime":392.37,"body":"author. Welcome, Dave. How ar"},{"speaker":"te","startTime":392.37,"endTime":394.47,"body":"you doing in London? Are you in"},{"speaker":"te","startTime":392.37,"endTime":394.47,"body":"London?"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":409.28,"endTime":412.04,"body":"Very good. And it"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":409.28,"endTime":412.04,"body":"won't be any surprise to you"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":412.04,"endTime":414.86,"body":"that it is raining cats and dogs"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":412.04,"endTime":414.86,"body":"here as well. I think it's more,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":415.13,"endTime":418.34,"body":"it's more no worry that it's"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":415.13,"endTime":418.34,"body":"raining where you are today is"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":418.34,"endTime":420.08,"body":"where we're riding it."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":420.11,"endTime":423.17,"body":"Yeah, I jumped out"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":420.11,"endTime":423.17,"body":"of my chair when the thunder"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":423.17,"endTime":423.68,"body":"went off."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":425.33,"endTime":426.56,"body":"I'm not used to it."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":426.69,"endTime":429.09,"body":"Do you like"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":426.69,"endTime":429.09,"body":"thunder? Do you get excited?"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":429.69,"endTime":433.89,"body":"I find it poetic"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":429.69,"endTime":433.89,"body":"and like beautiful um but in Los"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":433.89,"endTime":436.56,"body":"Angeles, it's scary cuz it's so"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":433.89,"endTime":436.56,"body":"abnormal"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":437.17,"endTime":440.41,"body":"Wow. That's"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":437.17,"endTime":440.41,"body":"really. It's terrible when I was"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":440.41,"endTime":443.56,"body":"a kid I remember we used to hop"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":440.41,"endTime":443.56,"body":"in the car and we used to drive"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":443.56,"endTime":447.4,"body":"round trying to chase. I mean,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":443.56,"endTime":447.4,"body":"getting in a metal box and"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":447.4,"endTime":448.24,"body":"trying to chase"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":455.79,"endTime":457.38,"body":"Well, at least"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":455.79,"endTime":457.38,"body":"you're comfortable in the rain."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":457.38,"endTime":459.45,"body":"I guess one of us is comfortable"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":457.38,"endTime":459.45,"body":"right now."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":460.98,"endTime":463.17,"body":"Completely. I"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":460.98,"endTime":463.17,"body":"mean, this is why I don't I"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":463.17,"endTime":466.29,"body":"don't understand why people have"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":463.17,"endTime":466.29,"body":"moved to the UK. I don't what"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":466.29,"endTime":471.09,"body":"have we got to offer? I mean,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":466.29,"endTime":471.09,"body":"got worse weather. We've got I"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":471.09,"endTime":474.57,"body":"mean our biggest exports sarcasm"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":471.09,"endTime":474.57,"body":"and I don't really know why"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":474.57,"endTime":476.91,"body":"anyone would would move it. But"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":474.57,"endTime":476.91,"body":"that"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":477.57,"endTime":481.44,"body":"sarcasm you have"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":477.57,"endTime":481.44,"body":"soccer and culture. You know,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":481.44,"endTime":483.39,"body":"there's a theater district."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":483.93,"endTime":486.54,"body":"That was before"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":483.93,"endTime":486.54,"body":"COVID. And now"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":487.77,"endTime":491.52,"body":"it's just loads of empty halls"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":487.77,"endTime":491.52,"body":"and I can't stand football or"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":491.52,"endTime":493.53,"body":"star soccer. I can't."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":494.79,"endTime":497.7,"body":"I forgot football."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":494.79,"endTime":497.7,"body":"Yeah, I lived in Norwich for"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":497.7,"endTime":500.64,"body":"three months. And it was it was"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":497.7,"endTime":500.64,"body":"like doom and gloom every day."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":500.64,"endTime":504.27,"body":"But I felt smarter hanging out"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":500.64,"endTime":504.27,"body":"with British people."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":504.96,"endTime":508.11,"body":"Besides that tree"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":504.96,"endTime":508.11,"body":"you feel more intellectual when"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":508.11,"endTime":508.59,"body":"you?"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":509.07,"endTime":511.95,"body":"Yeah, I think it's"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":509.07,"endTime":511.95,"body":"like the dialect and also like,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":511.98,"endTime":515.1,"body":"Oh, I'm somewhere different and"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":511.98,"endTime":515.1,"body":"America gets a rap for being"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":515.1,"endTime":518.7,"body":"pretty stupid. So I feel like"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":515.1,"endTime":518.7,"body":"any other country is a huge step"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":518.7,"endTime":518.94,"body":"up."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":520.23,"endTime":521.82,"body":"That's just my own personal"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":520.23,"endTime":521.82,"body":"belief."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":522.57,"endTime":525.93,"body":"I went to Italy"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":522.57,"endTime":525.93,"body":"like before the pandemic last"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":525.93,"endTime":529.08,"body":"year and it does like I just"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":525.93,"endTime":529.08,"body":"think Italians can make anything"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":529.08,"endTime":532.74,"body":"sound amazing. They could they"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":529.08,"endTime":532.74,"body":"could be calling you the worst"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":532.74,"endTime":535.86,"body":"thing they could be saying death"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":532.74,"endTime":535.86,"body":"your grandmother but just a"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":537.63,"endTime":540.03,"body":"great carry on me keep it"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":537.63,"endTime":540.03,"body":"covered. It's lovely."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":540.63,"endTime":543.33,"body":"Yeah, rolls off"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":540.63,"endTime":543.33,"body":"the tongue language and sound"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":543.33,"endTime":544.98,"body":"really can get away with a lot."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":545.61,"endTime":548.61,"body":"Yes, hugely."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":545.61,"endTime":548.61,"body":"Again. I think one of the French"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":548.61,"endTime":551.55,"body":"get away with so much because"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":548.61,"endTime":551.55,"body":"they've got such a beautiful"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":551.61,"endTime":555.3,"body":"sound in language is great love,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":551.61,"endTime":555.3,"body":"friend, love or friendship."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":555.33,"endTime":557.34,"body":"If you want to"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":555.33,"endTime":557.34,"body":"commit a crime, learn one of the"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":557.34,"endTime":560.97,"body":"romance languages and you're"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":557.34,"endTime":560.97,"body":"fine. Go with that."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":561.63,"endTime":563.55,"body":"Where's my"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":561.63,"endTime":563.55,"body":"girlfriend's know that Irish and"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":563.55,"endTime":564.9,"body":"nowadays? I mean,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":565.05,"endTime":567.12,"body":"guys like that's,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":565.05,"endTime":567.12,"body":"that's very guilty."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":568.11,"endTime":571.83,"body":"It is. Yeah,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":568.11,"endTime":571.83,"body":"exactly. Yeah. You're a bad mom."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":574.68,"endTime":576.45,"body":"It's just a little"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":574.68,"endTime":576.45,"body":"too harsh where you're like,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":576.45,"endTime":579.18,"body":"Huh, I'm skeptical and"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":576.45,"endTime":579.18,"body":"suspicious."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":579.99,"endTime":580.53,"body":"apps is"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":580.56,"endTime":583.65,"body":"tough. The Irish"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":580.56,"endTime":583.65,"body":"are tough. Very tough."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":583.68,"endTime":585.21,"body":"I mean, she"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":583.68,"endTime":585.21,"body":"terrifies me we need to get a"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":585.21,"endTime":589.71,"body":"five now. I haven't understood a"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":585.21,"endTime":589.71,"body":"word she said. So that's the and"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":589.71,"endTime":592.02,"body":"that's a problem. We went to"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":589.71,"endTime":592.02,"body":"this is honestly true in"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":592.02,"endTime":597.15,"body":"lockdown. We went to the chemist"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":592.02,"endTime":597.15,"body":"to pick up a prescription and we"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":597.15,"endTime":600.0,"body":"go there quite a lot. We know"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":597.15,"endTime":600.0,"body":"the chemist and we went in there"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":600.0,"endTime":604.05,"body":"So that leg is eyelashes like"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":600.0,"endTime":604.05,"body":"Sorry, madam. I'm really sorry."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":604.05,"endTime":607.11,"body":"It's your date of birth that"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":604.05,"endTime":607.11,"body":"nearly went 31st to me, idiot."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":607.59,"endTime":611.88,"body":"And the woman instantly like"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":607.59,"endTime":611.88,"body":"changes. I beg your pardon 31st"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":611.88,"endTime":615.63,"body":"me, idiot. And the woman was"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":611.88,"endTime":615.63,"body":"like what an owner like rolled"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":615.63,"endTime":619.08,"body":"her eyes because the accent"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":615.63,"endTime":619.08,"body":"again, but I didn't realize what"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":619.08,"endTime":622.89,"body":"was going on the cameras did for"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":619.08,"endTime":622.89,"body":"a nerd said 31st of May You"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":622.92,"endTime":628.05,"body":"idiot, because ataa an Irish"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":622.92,"endTime":628.05,"body":"idiot. It's just like Madden,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":628.05,"endTime":632.97,"body":"there is no need to be like,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":628.05,"endTime":632.97,"body":"this is amazing. This is pretty"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":632.97,"endTime":635.67,"body":"good. So yeah, that's there's"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":632.97,"endTime":635.67,"body":"the one upside of the accent."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":636.36,"endTime":639.96,"body":"That's like a"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":636.36,"endTime":639.96,"body":"superpower you can insult people"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":640.05,"endTime":642.72,"body":"like without meaning to or maybe"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":640.05,"endTime":642.72,"body":"you mean to insult them and they"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":642.72,"endTime":644.94,"body":"actually hear a VA like, that's"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":642.72,"endTime":644.94,"body":"pretty cool."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":646.38,"endTime":648.57,"body":"That's great. It's"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":646.38,"endTime":648.57,"body":"a superpower that record your"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":648.57,"endTime":650.79,"body":"voice honed long ago."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":651.42,"endTime":657.12,"body":"Yes. I like that."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":651.42,"endTime":657.12,"body":"But I'm glad you're of UK"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":657.12,"endTime":659.85,"body":"descent and I can understand you"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":657.12,"endTime":659.85,"body":"pretty well. So thank you for"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":659.88,"endTime":661.53,"body":"your understandable accent."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":662.04,"endTime":662.61,"body":"Um,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":662.73,"endTime":665.97,"body":"let's talk about"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":662.73,"endTime":665.97,"body":"therapy. Are you in therapy? If"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":665.97,"endTime":667.02,"body":"you are, how's it going?"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":667.05,"endTime":670.32,"body":"No, anymore was"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":667.05,"endTime":670.32,"body":"for two and a half years best"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":670.32,"endTime":671.31,"body":"experience."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":671.49,"endTime":672.15,"body":"What? Okay,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":672.179,"endTime":673.889,"body":"I was gonna say"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":672.179,"endTime":673.889,"body":"best experience of my life. But"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":673.889,"endTime":676.769,"body":"that, I mean, that really shames"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":673.889,"endTime":676.769,"body":"a lot of things that should be a"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":676.769,"endTime":679.979,"body":"lot further, you know, the birth"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":676.769,"endTime":679.979,"body":"of my niece, me and my"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":679.979,"endTime":684.839,"body":"girlfriend know, sitting in a"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":679.979,"endTime":684.839,"body":"room for an hour a week. So"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":684.839,"endTime":685.079,"body":"yeah,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":685.08,"endTime":688.47,"body":"baby, it likes"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":685.08,"endTime":688.47,"body":"flushes out compliments the best"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":688.47,"endTime":689.79,"body":"experience of your life."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":690.42,"endTime":694.08,"body":"I love that they"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":690.42,"endTime":694.08,"body":"go. That's why get out of jail"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":694.08,"endTime":699.12,"body":"free cards is everything. But"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":694.08,"endTime":699.12,"body":"yes, I was for two and a half"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":699.12,"endTime":701.1,"body":"years tried loads of different"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":699.12,"endTime":701.1,"body":"things. That's great."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":701.91,"endTime":705.84,"body":"Okay, cool. And"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":701.91,"endTime":705.84,"body":"are you recently out of therapy?"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":705.84,"endTime":709.68,"body":"Did you like cut it off? Because"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":705.84,"endTime":709.68,"body":"you felt good without it? How"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":709.68,"endTime":711.96,"body":"did you end it? Well, obviously,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":709.68,"endTime":711.96,"body":"being in the UK, so"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":711.96,"endTime":716.88,"body":"we've got the NHS,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":711.96,"endTime":716.88,"body":"and that's a thing. And it's not"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":716.88,"endTime":722.04,"body":"going very well. And, you know,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":716.88,"endTime":722.04,"body":"we're kind of currently doing"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":722.07,"endTime":724.41,"body":"the essential national sort of"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":722.07,"endTime":724.41,"body":"whip round, like if you've got a"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":724.41,"endTime":728.49,"body":"fiver check in for the doctors."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":724.41,"endTime":728.49,"body":"So it's not going brilliantly."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":728.73,"endTime":732.24,"body":"But I was very lucky in the NHS"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":728.73,"endTime":732.24,"body":"for two and a half years. And it"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":732.24,"endTime":735.18,"body":"got to a point where like, my"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":732.24,"endTime":735.18,"body":"therapist was like, Dave, come"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":735.18,"endTime":738.15,"body":"on, mate. Like, I think we've"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":735.18,"endTime":738.15,"body":"sort of we've run, we've run"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":738.15,"endTime":738.27,"body":"out,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":738.3,"endTime":739.59,"body":"your therapist"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":738.3,"endTime":739.59,"body":"kicks you out."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":740.85,"endTime":744.24,"body":"By breaking up, it"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":740.85,"endTime":744.24,"body":"really was. So it's kind of very"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":744.24,"endTime":751.29,"body":"odd experience. And that was"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":744.24,"endTime":751.29,"body":"probably about four years ago."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":751.29,"endTime":753.27,"body":"Now. I mean, this is something"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":751.29,"endTime":753.27,"body":"that I don't think a lot of"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":753.27,"endTime":757.14,"body":"people talk about terrifying"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":753.27,"endTime":757.14,"body":"experience finishing therapy."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":757.14,"endTime":757.59,"body":"It's like,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":757.65,"endTime":758.37,"body":"yeah,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":760.05,"endTime":762.72,"body":"I recently"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":760.05,"endTime":762.72,"body":"finished couples therapy with my"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":762.72,"endTime":766.53,"body":"boyfriend. And our therapist"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":762.72,"endTime":766.53,"body":"basically ended things during"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":766.53,"endTime":769.05,"body":"the sessions. He was like, this"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":766.53,"endTime":769.05,"body":"will be your last session, you"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":769.05,"endTime":772.56,"body":"know, you can call me for a one,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":769.05,"endTime":772.56,"body":"one session touch up in the"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":772.56,"endTime":775.08,"body":"future, but no more of this"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":772.56,"endTime":775.08,"body":"regular stuff. And I was like,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":775.11,"endTime":782.37,"body":"oh, okay, how things were done."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":775.11,"endTime":782.37,"body":"Um, my, my boyfriend was like,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":782.37,"endTime":784.47,"body":"Yeah, I think we're done with"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":782.37,"endTime":784.47,"body":"this. I think we've learned what"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":784.47,"endTime":787.11,"body":"we need to learn. And I was"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":784.47,"endTime":787.11,"body":"like, No, I feel abandoned. I"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":787.11,"endTime":789.84,"body":"was not ready for this sudden,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":787.11,"endTime":789.84,"body":"like, ends."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":790.89,"endTime":793.11,"body":"So it's such an"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":790.89,"endTime":793.11,"body":"odd thing, because I think you"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":793.11,"endTime":799.23,"body":"do build up that relationship so"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":793.11,"endTime":799.23,"body":"much. And I used to remember"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":799.23,"endTime":801.3,"body":"regularly think of what I'm"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":799.23,"endTime":801.3,"body":"going to talk about this in"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":801.3,"endTime":801.84,"body":"therapy."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":804.57,"endTime":807.3,"body":"It kind of gives"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":804.57,"endTime":807.3,"body":"you that future schedule. You're"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":807.3,"endTime":810.27,"body":"like I could dissect this later."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":807.3,"endTime":810.27,"body":"I'll do this Wednesday, you"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":810.27,"endTime":811.29,"body":"know? Well,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":811.29,"endTime":813.69,"body":"absolutely. And"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":811.29,"endTime":813.69,"body":"this is why at the moment,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":813.72,"endTime":816.24,"body":"because of the way that I've"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":813.72,"endTime":816.24,"body":"always sort of dealt with things"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":816.24,"endTime":820.11,"body":"is by sort of using sensitively"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":816.24,"endTime":820.11,"body":"using comedy in order to talk"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":820.11,"endTime":824.01,"body":"about, you know, tricky topics,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":820.11,"endTime":824.01,"body":"such as mental health, but"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":824.01,"endTime":827.31,"body":"that's why now I've kind of"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":824.01,"endTime":827.31,"body":"created a six week comedy course"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":827.34,"endTime":831.72,"body":"aimed at using comedy in order"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":827.34,"endTime":831.72,"body":"to build people's confidence,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":831.72,"endTime":834.6,"body":"their communication, their"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":831.72,"endTime":834.6,"body":"connection with other people"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":834.6,"endTime":837.12,"body":"earn all those skills that you"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":834.6,"endTime":837.12,"body":"build in therapy to sort of do"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":837.12,"endTime":841.08,"body":"it in an arts based therapeutic"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":837.12,"endTime":841.08,"body":"way. And it's been weird sort of"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":841.08,"endTime":844.35,"body":"seeing that the other side of it"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":841.08,"endTime":844.35,"body":"and being like, oh, now I'm on"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":844.35,"endTime":846.69,"body":"the other side of the table."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":844.35,"endTime":846.69,"body":"Very odd."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":847.17,"endTime":851.13,"body":"Yeah. For you have"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":847.17,"endTime":851.13,"body":"to like, organize it all and"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":851.13,"endTime":852.78,"body":"make sense of it a little bit"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":851.13,"endTime":852.78,"body":"more."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":853.14,"endTime":854.64,"body":"It makes me"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":853.14,"endTime":854.64,"body":"realize that a lot of the time I"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":854.64,"endTime":858.15,"body":"reckon, therapists you know, you"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":854.64,"endTime":858.15,"body":"know that thing about swans,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":858.18,"endTime":860.85,"body":"they're literally graceful, but"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":858.18,"endTime":860.85,"body":"their feet are flapping. And I"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":860.85,"endTime":864.84,"body":"bet good 90% of the time,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":860.85,"endTime":864.84,"body":"therapists are thinking, Oh,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":864.87,"endTime":867.87,"body":"God, I was just thinking about"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":864.87,"endTime":867.87,"body":"what I need to order from"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":867.87,"endTime":872.19,"body":"Amazon. I haven't been at all"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":867.87,"endTime":872.19,"body":"This is Karen."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":873.78,"endTime":876.06,"body":"Yeah, I always"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":873.78,"endTime":876.06,"body":"wonder that too, because I think"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":876.24,"endTime":878.97,"body":"like even doing this podcast, I"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":876.24,"endTime":878.97,"body":"think like I'm pretending to be"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":878.97,"endTime":882.3,"body":"a therapist of a pseudo"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":878.97,"endTime":882.3,"body":"therapist. And then if I was a"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":882.3,"endTime":885.75,"body":"real therapist, you know, it"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":882.3,"endTime":885.75,"body":"really tried to help people in"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":885.75,"endTime":890.01,"body":"crisis. That's a lot of pressure"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":885.75,"endTime":890.01,"body":"to put on yourself and then"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":890.01,"endTime":892.62,"body":"you've to pay attention that"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":890.01,"endTime":892.62,"body":"whole session like you can't,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":892.8,"endTime":895.35,"body":"you can't write down something"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":892.8,"endTime":895.35,"body":"on your shopping list. You're in"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":895.35,"endTime":895.56,"body":"it."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":895.949,"endTime":898.289,"body":"What what happens"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":895.949,"endTime":898.289,"body":"if you get something like I"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":898.289,"endTime":901.979,"body":"don't know if you ever get like"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":898.289,"endTime":901.979,"body":"an eyelid twit. Or if he really,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":902.219,"endTime":906.149,"body":"he bombed like, can you you"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":902.219,"endTime":906.149,"body":"can't like someone's like"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":906.149,"endTime":908.999,"body":"halfway through saying, you"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":906.149,"endTime":908.999,"body":"know, I can't see any point in"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":908.999,"endTime":912.209,"body":"going on you can't think I'm"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":908.999,"endTime":912.209,"body":"really nice crush my bomb right"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":912.209,"endTime":916.019,"body":"now it's so weird. Yeah, I"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":916.02,"endTime":919.41,"body":"guess you can but"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":916.02,"endTime":919.41,"body":"it might affect your Yelp review"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":920.01,"endTime":921.51,"body":"my reflect poorly?"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":922.62,"endTime":924.18,"body":"Yeah, that's a very"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":922.62,"endTime":924.18,"body":"good point."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":925.65,"endTime":927.93,"body":"Although in the"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":925.65,"endTime":927.93,"body":"virtual age, maybe it's easier"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":927.93,"endTime":930.3,"body":"for therapists to like chill out"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":927.93,"endTime":930.3,"body":"a little bit if they're doing"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":930.3,"endTime":933.45,"body":"zoom sessions or virtual"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":930.3,"endTime":933.45,"body":"sessions. Well,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":933.48,"endTime":936.27,"body":"I had a very"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":933.48,"endTime":936.27,"body":"interesting chat with the other"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":936.27,"endTime":939.15,"body":"day she says she prefers zoom"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":936.27,"endTime":939.15,"body":"sessions. I said, that's really"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":939.15,"endTime":942.72,"body":"odd, because a lot of people I"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":939.15,"endTime":942.72,"body":"know don't. And she said, I find"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":942.72,"endTime":945.36,"body":"it mental that people would"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":942.72,"endTime":945.36,"body":"prefer in person sessions. So"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":945.36,"endTime":950.31,"body":"when she said, the reason that"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":945.36,"endTime":950.31,"body":"she realized over time was, she"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":950.31,"endTime":954.24,"body":"can go plunk herself in a little"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":950.31,"endTime":954.24,"body":"room. She can have a little zoom"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":954.24,"endTime":957.93,"body":"session, she can cry, she can"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":954.24,"endTime":957.93,"body":"scream, she can say whatever she"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":957.93,"endTime":962.1,"body":"wants, knowing that when she"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":957.93,"endTime":962.1,"body":"finished she just told her opens"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":962.1,"endTime":964.86,"body":"the door makes a cup of tea with"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":962.1,"endTime":964.86,"body":"it. She was like, if I asked to"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":964.86,"endTime":968.94,"body":"go to like hospital or office or"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":964.86,"endTime":968.94,"body":"something I have to get back on"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":968.94,"endTime":972.06,"body":"the train after got on the tube"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":968.94,"endTime":972.06,"body":"after and I hadn't thought of"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":972.06,"endTime":976.38,"body":"that of like composing yourself"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":972.06,"endTime":976.38,"body":"afterwards. Yeah, like"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":976.38,"endTime":978.96,"body":"the whole commute"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":976.38,"endTime":978.96,"body":"aspects like driving to the"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":978.96,"endTime":983.13,"body":"place or commuting to the place"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":978.96,"endTime":983.13,"body":"as a whole production. That's,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":983.16,"endTime":985.53,"body":"I mean, that's the"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":983.16,"endTime":985.53,"body":"thing that I hadn't really even"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":985.92,"endTime":988.02,"body":"considered. Oh, yeah, good"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":985.92,"endTime":988.02,"body":"point."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":988.74,"endTime":991.23,"body":"Yeah, I prefer the"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":988.74,"endTime":991.23,"body":"zoom sessions myself. It just"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":991.23,"endTime":993.33,"body":"you know, one step easier. Hmm."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":993.54,"endTime":995.58,"body":"Yeah, I don't see"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":993.54,"endTime":995.58,"body":"you can do anyway. I'm not even"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":995.58,"endTime":997.2,"body":"wearing any crowns. Great."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":997.26,"endTime":998.73,"body":"Yeah, I can't"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":997.26,"endTime":998.73,"body":"tell."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1000.38,"endTime":1001.22,"body":"That's perfect."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1002.72,"endTime":1004.13,"body":"How was your"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1002.72,"endTime":1004.13,"body":"childhood?"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1005.09,"endTime":1009.65,"body":"Brilliant, loved"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1005.09,"endTime":1009.65,"body":"it. That was one of the problems"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1009.71,"endTime":1014.15,"body":"of actually my sort of mental"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1009.71,"endTime":1014.15,"body":"illness. I lived in an episode"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1014.15,"endTime":1017.12,"body":"of community essentially, I but"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1014.15,"endTime":1017.12,"body":"I didn't realize this until"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1017.12,"endTime":1020.63,"body":"later. The school I went to was"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1017.12,"endTime":1020.63,"body":"the most underfunded school in"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1020.66,"endTime":1025.46,"body":"Staffordshire. But the teaching"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1020.66,"endTime":1025.46,"body":"was just amazing. They're all"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1025.46,"endTime":1028.19,"body":"like newly qualified teachers"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1025.46,"endTime":1028.19,"body":"who were working in this little"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1028.19,"endTime":1032.0,"body":"village. And the kids which are"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1028.19,"endTime":1032.0,"body":"the kids my year were brilliant."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1032.15,"endTime":1036.44,"body":"bring this back. I was head boy"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1032.15,"endTime":1036.44,"body":"or senior bermad as they like to"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1036.44,"endTime":1039.83,"body":"call me. And because we were the"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1036.44,"endTime":1039.83,"body":"most underfunded school in"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1039.83,"endTime":1042.68,"body":"Staffordshire, why I sort of did"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1039.83,"endTime":1042.68,"body":"a little deal with the head of"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1042.68,"endTime":1045.17,"body":"fit form. And we had our own"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1042.68,"endTime":1045.17,"body":"little set form room and it's"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1045.17,"endTime":1049.07,"body":"about 300 dentists asked Miss"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1045.17,"endTime":1049.07,"body":"Gibbs. We all know budgets are"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1049.07,"endTime":1052.4,"body":"really tight. Sit for room is"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1049.07,"endTime":1052.4,"body":"terrible. So how about this?"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1052.58,"endTime":1055.55,"body":"over the six weeks summer"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1052.58,"endTime":1055.55,"body":"holidays? Why don't you give me"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1055.55,"endTime":1060.23,"body":"the keys to sit for me. We will"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1055.55,"endTime":1060.23,"body":"come in, we'll paint the sick"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1060.23,"endTime":1063.77,"body":"form room. We'll do it up with"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1060.23,"endTime":1063.77,"body":"decorate it we'll do a whip"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1063.77,"endTime":1067.34,"body":"round we'll buy sofas, whatever"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1063.77,"endTime":1067.34,"body":"it was. All right. As long as I"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1067.34,"endTime":1071.21,"body":"have to do booger all that's"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1067.34,"endTime":1071.21,"body":"fine. So we put in so first we"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1071.21,"endTime":1074.78,"body":"had our hi fi system, it was"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1071.21,"endTime":1074.78,"body":"indoor cricket. It was it was"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1074.81,"endTime":1079.07,"body":"just amazing. Actually, one of"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1074.81,"endTime":1079.07,"body":"the reasons is one of the many"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1079.07,"endTime":1083.69,"body":"reasons so sparkly in disorder,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1079.07,"endTime":1083.69,"body":"which I loved. I loved school,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1083.69,"endTime":1086.0,"body":"and I started getting this"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1083.69,"endTime":1086.0,"body":"girlfriend and everything was"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1086.0,"endTime":1090.56,"body":"perfect. But when I was moving"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1086.0,"endTime":1090.56,"body":"away to university, my happiness"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1090.56,"endTime":1094.55,"body":"had a sell by date, I had a very"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1090.56,"endTime":1094.55,"body":"definite date of like, well"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1094.55,"endTime":1096.2,"body":"actually, I'm going to leave my"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1094.55,"endTime":1096.2,"body":"family my friends were a"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1096.2,"endTime":1099.65,"body":"girlfriend at that time. 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And I"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1222.26,"endTime":1226.4,"body":"think the eating disorder"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1222.26,"endTime":1226.4,"body":"insidiously kind of crept in,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1226.46,"endTime":1231.35,"body":"like, like a little mouse that"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1226.46,"endTime":1231.35,"body":"was annoyed. And it sort of"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1232.37,"endTime":1236.48,"body":"crept in because I, you know, it"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1232.37,"endTime":1236.48,"body":"started off as a way myself once"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1236.48,"endTime":1239.48,"body":"a day. And then I say, like in"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1236.48,"endTime":1239.48,"body":"that will be in the morning. And"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1239.48,"endTime":1242.66,"body":"now where myself in the evening"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1239.48,"endTime":1242.66,"body":"sandwich or weight fluctuated, I"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1242.66,"endTime":1244.7,"body":"think, because I lived in this"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1242.66,"endTime":1244.7,"body":"little village, you know, as any"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1244.7,"endTime":1248.78,"body":"offer Marlo, and actually, it"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1244.7,"endTime":1248.78,"body":"was more exercise. So nepo lunch"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1248.78,"endTime":1251.66,"body":"to weigh myself. And then"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1248.78,"endTime":1251.66,"body":"actually, I started creeping off"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1251.66,"endTime":1254.33,"body":"school to where myself mid"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1251.66,"endTime":1254.33,"body":"afternoon to inspire me to eat"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1254.33,"endTime":1257.06,"body":"less, and I was weighing myself,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1254.33,"endTime":1257.06,"body":"you know, sort of five, six"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1257.06,"endTime":1262.07,"body":"times a day, but because it"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1257.06,"endTime":1262.07,"body":"develops rather than began, it"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1262.07,"endTime":1265.37,"body":"kind of became normal, and it"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1262.07,"endTime":1265.37,"body":"became normal to have X amount"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1265.37,"endTime":1271.97,"body":"of calories or do X amount of"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1265.37,"endTime":1271.97,"body":"exercise each day. And I enjoyed"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1271.97,"endTime":1274.88,"body":"it. This is one of the horrible"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1271.97,"endTime":1274.88,"body":"truth. I'm not glorifying,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1274.88,"endTime":1278.75,"body":"condoning, or certainly not"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1274.88,"endTime":1278.75,"body":"promoting eating disorders. But"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1278.75,"endTime":1281.9,"body":"you know what overtime, it was a"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1278.75,"endTime":1281.9,"body":"little when it didn't matter if"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1281.9,"endTime":1285.44,"body":"Durham University didn't accept"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1281.9,"endTime":1285.44,"body":"me or didn't get an A, on that"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1285.44,"endTime":1290.09,"body":"paper. As long as I got down to"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1285.44,"endTime":1290.09,"body":"x weight or even x calories, it"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1290.09,"endTime":1292.31,"body":"felt like a little shortcut."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1290.09,"endTime":1292.31,"body":"Feeling good."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1293.06,"endTime":1295.25,"body":"Yeah, like it was"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1293.06,"endTime":1295.25,"body":"the thing you could control you"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1295.25,"endTime":1298.76,"body":"can obsess over and, you know,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1295.25,"endTime":1298.76,"body":"you can do that, if nothing"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1298.76,"endTime":1299.33,"body":"else."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1299.69,"endTime":1301.49,"body":"See, that is the"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1299.69,"endTime":1301.49,"body":"thing that's the word always"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1301.49,"endTime":1304.25,"body":"comes up is control. And for a"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1301.49,"endTime":1304.25,"body":"long time, I was always like,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1304.25,"endTime":1308.54,"body":"no, it's not, you know, it's not"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1304.25,"endTime":1308.54,"body":"control. So I'll be in it. But I"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1309.32,"endTime":1313.01,"body":"think you're absolutely right,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1309.32,"endTime":1313.01,"body":"that in a weird way, it was"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1313.01,"endTime":1315.89,"body":"about control. But it wasn't"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1313.01,"endTime":1315.89,"body":"about control of like, right,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1315.89,"endTime":1320.45,"body":"just calories. I think it's"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1315.89,"endTime":1320.45,"body":"because in this chaotic Maya"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1320.48,"endTime":1326.39,"body":"that we call the planet there is"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1320.48,"endTime":1326.39,"body":"so very few things that you can"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1326.39,"endTime":1329.66,"body":"measure independence, whereas"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1326.39,"endTime":1329.66,"body":"the eating disorder depended in"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1329.66,"endTime":1334.67,"body":"numbers, Calories, Weights, axes"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1329.66,"endTime":1334.67,"body":"are that those are numbers."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1334.7,"endTime":1337.43,"body":"Those are quantifiable things."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1334.7,"endTime":1337.43,"body":"And when you don't feel good"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1337.43,"endTime":1341.36,"body":"enough, you know, Twitter"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1337.43,"endTime":1341.36,"body":"numbers, subscribers, followers,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1341.36,"endTime":1344.93,"body":"they all go up and down. And"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1341.36,"endTime":1344.93,"body":"they're very sort of weird way"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1344.93,"endTime":1348.2,"body":"of measuring yourself where"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1344.93,"endTime":1348.2,"body":"weight was something that was"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1348.2,"endTime":1348.98,"body":"always there."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1349.64,"endTime":1356.03,"body":"Yeah, like it made"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1349.64,"endTime":1356.03,"body":"sense on paper. Yeah. And you so"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1356.06,"endTime":1360.08,"body":"didn't really like peak when you"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1356.06,"endTime":1360.08,"body":"got cast in this play and"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1360.08,"endTime":1360.56,"body":"school?"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1361.01,"endTime":1362.42,"body":"Kind of weird"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1361.01,"endTime":1362.42,"body":"because it kind of like peaks"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1362.42,"endTime":1365.09,"body":"and troughs. And then the honest"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1362.42,"endTime":1365.09,"body":"answer, and this is where it"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1365.09,"endTime":1368.57,"body":"kind of gets a bit. So weird. I"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1365.09,"endTime":1368.57,"body":"didn't actually realize that"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1368.57,"endTime":1371.36,"body":"I've got name disorder for quite"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1368.57,"endTime":1371.36,"body":"a long time when I was sort of"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1371.54,"endTime":1376.4,"body":"1718 people kept on telling me"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1371.54,"endTime":1376.4,"body":"that I was anorexic. And I was"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1376.4,"endTime":1378.05,"body":"like, well, that's their stuff."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1376.4,"endTime":1378.05,"body":"If they're going to be"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1378.05,"endTime":1382.76,"body":"melodramatic. I was I I remember"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1378.05,"endTime":1382.76,"body":"very, like your mom, my mom"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1382.76,"endTime":1386.18,"body":"crying and screaming up at me"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1382.76,"endTime":1386.18,"body":"and go like you're anorexic. And"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1386.18,"endTime":1388.79,"body":"I was like, Whoa, this is more"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1386.18,"endTime":1388.79,"body":"about you than it does about me."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1388.79,"endTime":1390.41,"body":"I mean, you know, come Oh, wow,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1390.44,"endTime":1392.09,"body":"you're such big"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1390.44,"endTime":1392.09,"body":"denial."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1392.119,"endTime":1394.729,"body":"Yeah, it was."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1392.119,"endTime":1394.729,"body":"Yeah. Well, I didn't I honestly"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1394.729,"endTime":1398.329,"body":"didn't realize because I think"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1394.729,"endTime":1398.329,"body":"all of those stories and stuff"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1398.389,"endTime":1402.589,"body":"about anorexia were people that"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1398.389,"endTime":1402.589,"body":"ate or there were people that"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1402.589,"endTime":1406.189,"body":"weighed less than a bag of"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1402.589,"endTime":1406.189,"body":"crisps and other Thor acts like"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1406.189,"endTime":1411.559,"body":"a toast rack, whereas I was just"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1406.189,"endTime":1411.559,"body":"bumbling along. And I enjoyed"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1411.559,"endTime":1416.389,"body":"it. selfishly, I did in dress."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1411.559,"endTime":1416.389,"body":"And actually the first time I"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1416.389,"endTime":1419.449,"body":"realized and associate that did"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1416.389,"endTime":1419.449,"body":"have an eating disorder was when"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1419.449,"endTime":1424.129,"body":"I was about 20. And I was doing"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1419.449,"endTime":1424.129,"body":"this. They call them TEFL,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1424.129,"endTime":1426.049,"body":"teaching English as a foreign"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1424.129,"endTime":1426.049,"body":"language. They have loads of"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1426.049,"endTime":1428.839,"body":"boarding schools around the UK,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1426.049,"endTime":1428.839,"body":"and kids from all over the"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1428.839,"endTime":1431.809,"body":"world, a lot of European"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1428.839,"endTime":1431.809,"body":"countries come here to improve"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1431.809,"endTime":1435.199,"body":"their English. And this was this"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1431.809,"endTime":1435.199,"body":"place called Somerset in"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1435.229,"endTime":1438.019,"body":"England, which is like so remote"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1435.229,"endTime":1438.019,"body":"the nearest shot was three and a"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1438.019,"endTime":1440.599,"body":"half miles away. And all the"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1438.019,"endTime":1440.599,"body":"food was like pizza past the"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1440.599,"endTime":1445.009,"body":"church and I just couldn't"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1440.599,"endTime":1445.009,"body":"believe how much I started on"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1445.009,"endTime":1447.259,"body":"threading and I started setting"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1445.009,"endTime":1447.259,"body":"my alarm in the middle of the"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1447.259,"endTime":1451.879,"body":"night to do exercises. I started"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1447.259,"endTime":1451.879,"body":"skipping meals, but then I would"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1451.879,"endTime":1455.029,"body":"sort of binge in front of people"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1451.879,"endTime":1455.029,"body":"because it was a communal dining"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1455.029,"endTime":1459.139,"body":"hall as is and then I was like"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1455.029,"endTime":1459.139,"body":"coffee loading shrine avoid food"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1459.139,"endTime":1463.339,"body":"and as a binge pad tired or one"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1459.139,"endTime":1463.339,"body":"of the teachers who said look,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1463.849,"endTime":1466.519,"body":"I've I believe me her and I've"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1463.849,"endTime":1466.519,"body":"been in therapy for three times"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1466.519,"endTime":1468.289,"body":"I find this a really tough"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1466.519,"endTime":1468.289,"body":"environment. Have you ever"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1468.289,"endTime":1472.399,"body":"thought you might be anorexic?"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1468.289,"endTime":1472.399,"body":"And that was the first time"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1472.429,"endTime":1475.729,"body":"somebody asked me rather than"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1472.429,"endTime":1475.729,"body":"challenge me."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1477.02,"endTime":1479.48,"body":"Yeah, and also"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1477.02,"endTime":1479.48,"body":"identifying their own problem"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1479.48,"endTime":1483.65,"body":"upfront saying, hey, I've been"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1479.48,"endTime":1483.65,"body":"in, you know, therapy, rehab,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1483.65,"endTime":1487.64,"body":"whatever for Bolivia. I can"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1483.65,"endTime":1487.64,"body":"recognize this. I think you have"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1487.64,"endTime":1490.37,"body":"a problem or like maybe you have"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1487.64,"endTime":1490.37,"body":"a problem. What do you think?"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1490.4,"endTime":1493.22,"body":"Yeah, completely."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1490.4,"endTime":1493.22,"body":"I think that sort of lived"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1493.22,"endTime":1495.68,"body":"experience angles really"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1493.22,"endTime":1495.68,"body":"important because it's the you"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1495.68,"endTime":1500.3,"body":"know, you know, judging or you"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1495.68,"endTime":1500.3,"body":"know, sort of holding back I'm"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1500.3,"endTime":1505.13,"body":"not poking fun, I get it for"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1500.3,"endTime":1505.13,"body":"certain direction that, you"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1505.13,"endTime":1506.84,"body":"know, you might be struggling. I"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1505.13,"endTime":1506.84,"body":"think that was really"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1506.84,"endTime":1508.73,"body":"interesting, but I never did"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1506.84,"endTime":1508.73,"body":"anything about it because I"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1508.73,"endTime":1511.7,"body":"never felt anorexic enough. And"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1508.73,"endTime":1511.7,"body":"there's certain things about"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1512.03,"endTime":1515.09,"body":"disorders that we know that like"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1512.03,"endTime":1515.09,"body":"80% of people that have, for"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1515.09,"endTime":1520.34,"body":"example, believe me, or a mid"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1515.09,"endTime":1520.34,"body":"range, BMI, and people get on,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1520.37,"endTime":1523.61,"body":"you know, sort of, I'd make a"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1520.37,"endTime":1523.61,"body":"stupid joke in the show of like,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1523.61,"endTime":1526.13,"body":"you know, people kept on saying"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1523.61,"endTime":1526.13,"body":"to me, when I started doing the"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1526.13,"endTime":1529.16,"body":"show, which was a caused a huge"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1526.13,"endTime":1529.16,"body":"relapse, and why I ended up in"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1529.16,"endTime":1532.04,"body":"hospital was because people get"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1529.16,"endTime":1532.04,"body":"some say, You don't look"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1532.4,"endTime":1535.22,"body":"anorexic, and the correct"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1532.4,"endTime":1535.22,"body":"response, something like that,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1535.22,"endTime":1538.76,"body":"as well. You don't look like a"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1535.22,"endTime":1538.76,"body":"friggin idiot. But we were both"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1538.76,"endTime":1541.94,"body":"surprised. The mental Oh, yeah,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1538.76,"endTime":1541.94,"body":"it's not an aesthetic."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1542.75,"endTime":1545.75,"body":"It's also not"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1542.75,"endTime":1545.75,"body":"something you wear on your body"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1545.75,"endTime":1549.35,"body":"necessarily. Like it's more like"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1545.75,"endTime":1549.35,"body":"internal. And what are your"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1549.35,"endTime":1553.37,"body":"habits? Are you obsessed with"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1549.35,"endTime":1553.37,"body":"like exercise, calorie counting?"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1553.4,"endTime":1555.11,"body":"Those are the science of it"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1555.2,"endTime":1558.89,"body":"completely. And it"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1555.2,"endTime":1558.89,"body":"manifests in different people in"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1558.89,"endTime":1561.44,"body":"different ways. And it's"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1558.89,"endTime":1561.44,"body":"absolutely not a diet gone"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1561.44,"endTime":1564.2,"body":"wrong. I can see why people"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1561.44,"endTime":1564.2,"body":"would think that but I think the"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1564.2,"endTime":1567.92,"body":"whole kind of way that we see."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1564.2,"endTime":1567.92,"body":"Weight is interesting, because"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1567.92,"endTime":1570.56,"body":"people kept on saying to me when"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1567.92,"endTime":1570.56,"body":"I lost weight people at all, you"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1570.56,"endTime":1575.3,"body":"look good, well done. All right."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1570.56,"endTime":1575.3,"body":"And that was kind of like if"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1575.48,"endTime":1578.06,"body":"losing weights good. And putting"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1575.48,"endTime":1578.06,"body":"on weight must be bad. I don't"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1578.06,"endTime":1580.16,"body":"want to be bad. Of course, I'm"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1578.06,"endTime":1580.16,"body":"not going to put on weight."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1581.3,"endTime":1584.18,"body":"Mm hmm. And then"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1581.3,"endTime":1584.18,"body":"you probably like, I know, the"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1584.18,"endTime":1587.21,"body":"time I was fitness in my life, I"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1584.18,"endTime":1587.21,"body":"got the most attention the most"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1587.21,"endTime":1590.81,"body":"compliments. And I was like,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1587.21,"endTime":1590.81,"body":"Well, yeah, like I was I don't I"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1590.81,"endTime":1594.77,"body":"was never anorexic. Like I think"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1590.81,"endTime":1594.77,"body":"I wanted to be, but I would you"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1594.77,"endTime":1597.8,"body":"know, obsess over food and"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1594.77,"endTime":1597.8,"body":"exercise. And whenever I got a"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1597.8,"endTime":1601.1,"body":"compliment, like replenish me, I"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1597.8,"endTime":1601.1,"body":"say Awesome. Thanks, my neck"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1601.1,"endTime":1603.47,"body":"looks then like, I must be doing"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1601.1,"endTime":1603.47,"body":"it. Right."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1604.19,"endTime":1606.17,"body":"And this is the"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1604.19,"endTime":1606.17,"body":"thing I think you've absolutely"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1606.17,"endTime":1608.69,"body":"hit the nail on the head of"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1606.17,"endTime":1608.69,"body":"like, you know, I aspire to be"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1608.69,"endTime":1612.23,"body":"anorexic. I think all anorexics"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1608.69,"endTime":1612.23,"body":"feel like that, because bottom"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1612.23,"endTime":1615.02,"body":"line, you can't you can't go"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1612.23,"endTime":1615.02,"body":"weeks on end without food ban."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1615.02,"endTime":1619.22,"body":"Now, one of the myths about our"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1615.02,"endTime":1619.22,"body":"exes was that, you know, you you"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1619.22,"endTime":1622.79,"body":"go for days, weeks on end"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1619.22,"endTime":1622.79,"body":"without food. I'll put it"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1622.82,"endTime":1626.51,"body":"completely out there. I never"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1622.82,"endTime":1626.51,"body":"went a single day without food."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1626.54,"endTime":1629.84,"body":"I had very little food. And I'm"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1626.54,"endTime":1629.84,"body":"not going to you know, sort of"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1629.84,"endTime":1633.59,"body":"divulge the calorie count. But"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1629.84,"endTime":1633.59,"body":"it's still something I'm hugely"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1633.59,"endTime":1636.74,"body":"embarrassed about that I never"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1633.59,"endTime":1636.74,"body":"went a full day without food."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1636.74,"endTime":1639.59,"body":"But you know what, for people"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1636.74,"endTime":1639.59,"body":"that live with restrictive"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1639.59,"endTime":1642.08,"body":"eating disorders, that that"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1639.59,"endTime":1642.08,"body":"isn't normally and not feeling"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1642.08,"endTime":1645.23,"body":"good enough, not feeling"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1642.08,"endTime":1645.23,"body":"anorexic enough is a very, very"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1645.23,"endTime":1646.22,"body":"common thing."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1647.21,"endTime":1650.33,"body":"Yeah, and also,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1647.21,"endTime":1650.33,"body":"when you see these people you"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1650.33,"endTime":1653.93,"body":"aspire to be these, like railfan"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1650.33,"endTime":1653.93,"body":"people. And then you put them on"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1653.93,"endTime":1657.65,"body":"a pedestal and they also look so"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1653.93,"endTime":1657.65,"body":"weak. Like I know the people I"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1657.65,"endTime":1659.57,"body":"will look up to like, oh,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1657.65,"endTime":1659.57,"body":"they're so skinny. I wish I"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1659.57,"endTime":1662.96,"body":"could be like her. They look"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1659.57,"endTime":1662.96,"body":"like they can barely breathe or"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1662.96,"endTime":1666.53,"body":"move because they look so thin"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1662.96,"endTime":1666.53,"body":"and so skeleton like and you"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1666.53,"endTime":1669.05,"body":"know, they're just surviving out"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1666.53,"endTime":1669.05,"body":"like barely anything most"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1669.05,"endTime":1669.56,"body":"likely."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1669.83,"endTime":1671.75,"body":"And also the"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1669.83,"endTime":1671.75,"body":"elephant in the room is the Oh"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1671.75,"endTime":1676.16,"body":"sexuality. bit and you know,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1671.75,"endTime":1676.16,"body":"being sexy, feeling sexy. And"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1676.16,"endTime":1679.4,"body":"the irony is, you know, sort of"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1676.16,"endTime":1679.4,"body":"like people who've got problems"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1679.4,"endTime":1681.53,"body":"with their body issues."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1679.4,"endTime":1681.53,"body":"Probably, you know, you could"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1681.53,"endTime":1684.47,"body":"probably look a million dollars"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1681.53,"endTime":1684.47,"body":"a year not gonna feel him B's"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1684.5,"endTime":1687.74,"body":"sexy time ain't gonna happen. So"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1684.5,"endTime":1687.74,"body":"I, yeah,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1687.77,"endTime":1689.78,"body":"I do, you're gonna"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1687.77,"endTime":1689.78,"body":"fail, you're gonna fail before"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1689.78,"endTime":1690.44,"body":"you have sex."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1691.79,"endTime":1695.39,"body":"A really odd"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1691.79,"endTime":1695.39,"body":"dichotomy there of you know,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1695.39,"endTime":1697.67,"body":"sort of, you know, there's"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1695.39,"endTime":1697.67,"body":"people think that you want to do"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1697.7,"endTime":1701.96,"body":"to look sexy gradually, really"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1697.7,"endTime":1701.96,"body":"not because sex is probably the"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1701.96,"endTime":1702.92,"body":"last Lego divides."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1703.7,"endTime":1705.89,"body":"Yeah, all you're"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1703.7,"endTime":1705.89,"body":"thinking about is food and"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1705.89,"endTime":1709.67,"body":"exercise. Like if you have that,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1705.89,"endTime":1709.67,"body":"that certain brand of eating"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1709.67,"endTime":1712.37,"body":"disorder where you're like, once"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1709.67,"endTime":1712.37,"body":"I eat, I have to plan my"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1712.37,"endTime":1714.98,"body":"exercise routine. And then you"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1712.37,"endTime":1714.98,"body":"know, after that, like, I have"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1714.98,"endTime":1718.1,"body":"to eat but not not too much. And"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1714.98,"endTime":1718.1,"body":"you're, you're constantly"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1718.1,"endTime":1720.23,"body":"wrapped up in that thought"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1718.1,"endTime":1720.23,"body":"cycle. You can't think of"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1720.23,"endTime":1723.05,"body":"anything else. And that's one of"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1720.23,"endTime":1723.05,"body":"the things that made recovery"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1723.05,"endTime":1727.4,"body":"for me. So odd was again, not"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1723.05,"endTime":1727.4,"body":"promoting easels in any way"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1727.4,"endTime":1732.08,"body":"shape. One of the things that I"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1727.4,"endTime":1732.08,"body":"loved about being anorexic was"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1732.08,"endTime":1735.38,"body":"he starved out emotionally"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1732.08,"endTime":1735.38,"body":"starved out things I didn't want"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1735.38,"endTime":1738.17,"body":"to confront IE, my sex drive."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1738.26,"endTime":1741.32,"body":"Oh god and having"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1738.26,"endTime":1741.32,"body":"no sex drive is brilliant. I"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1741.32,"endTime":1745.7,"body":"mean, you get so much more admin"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1741.32,"endTime":1745.7,"body":"done, especially, you know,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1745.7,"endTime":1750.41,"body":"being a bloke that self employed"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1745.7,"endTime":1750.41,"body":"so he spends most of his on his"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1750.41,"endTime":1755.21,"body":"own with a laptop and Wi Fi I"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1750.41,"endTime":1755.21,"body":"mean, Christ when I had no sex"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1755.21,"endTime":1759.17,"body":"drive, oh, my productivity"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1755.21,"endTime":1759.17,"body":"through the roof. And I do miss"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1759.17,"endTime":1762.17,"body":"that. And then when going back,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1759.17,"endTime":1762.17,"body":"you're answering"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1762.17,"endTime":1764.9,"body":"all those emails"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1762.17,"endTime":1764.9,"body":"and all right back to everyone."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1765.98,"endTime":1768.38,"body":"I need to I looked"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1765.98,"endTime":1768.38,"body":"at advertising in a different"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1768.38,"endTime":1771.17,"body":"way. Like, you know, different"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1768.38,"endTime":1771.17,"body":"brands over here that you know,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1771.23,"endTime":1774.02,"body":"I mean, the weirdest one is"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1771.23,"endTime":1774.02,"body":"chocolate adverts always have"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1774.02,"endTime":1777.74,"body":"sexy women in them. And you just"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1774.02,"endTime":1777.74,"body":"like look at them. You never had"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1777.74,"endTime":1779.69,"body":"a dairy milk in your life what"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1777.74,"endTime":1779.69,"body":"you want"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1780.8,"endTime":1783.86,"body":"and you're lying"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1780.8,"endTime":1783.86,"body":"to me. It's just it's so"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1783.89,"endTime":1787.97,"body":"and I hate it. I"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1783.89,"endTime":1787.97,"body":"absolutely bored getting my sex"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1787.97,"endTime":1789.41,"body":"drive back. It was terrifying."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1791.33,"endTime":1794.15,"body":"Why do you think"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1791.33,"endTime":1794.15,"body":"you enjoyed it so much like"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1794.15,"endTime":1796.16,"body":"this, this chase for perfection?"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1798.47,"endTime":1802.52,"body":"It's a good"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1798.47,"endTime":1802.52,"body":"question. I I think I think it"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1802.52,"endTime":1808.01,"body":"was, are we talking in terms of"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1802.52,"endTime":1808.01,"body":"the eating disorder or the sex"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1808.01,"endTime":1808.58,"body":"drive?"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1809.929,"endTime":1813.109,"body":"Um, the eating"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1809.929,"endTime":1813.109,"body":"disorder like when you when you"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1813.109,"endTime":1816.229,"body":"got all this compliments these,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1813.109,"endTime":1816.229,"body":"this attention that was"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1816.229,"endTime":1819.439,"body":"positive, like, Why did you keep"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1816.229,"endTime":1819.439,"body":"seeking that out?"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1819.949,"endTime":1822.319,"body":"I think I think I"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1819.949,"endTime":1822.319,"body":"did in fairness, I didn't really"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1822.319,"endTime":1826.219,"body":"seek out the like the physical"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1822.319,"endTime":1826.219,"body":"complements. Ironically, I think"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1826.219,"endTime":1829.039,"body":"one of the reasons is I actually"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1826.219,"endTime":1829.039,"body":"want him to blend in rather than"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1829.039,"endTime":1832.189,"body":"stand out. And I say that"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1829.039,"endTime":1832.189,"body":"because I remember, I know, I've"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1832.189,"endTime":1836.659,"body":"painted this sort of milk and"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1832.189,"endTime":1836.659,"body":"honey experience of school, but"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1836.659,"endTime":1839.479,"body":"we weren't, you know, not"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1836.659,"endTime":1839.479,"body":"everyone, there were 300 kids in"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1839.479,"endTime":1842.509,"body":"my ear, not all of them are"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1839.479,"endTime":1842.509,"body":"angels. And I remember when we"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1842.509,"endTime":1846.199,"body":"did what we call PA, or you guys"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1842.509,"endTime":1846.199,"body":"might call Jim, like, when you"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1846.199,"endTime":1848.539,"body":"go outside and just embarrass,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1846.199,"endTime":1848.539,"body":"yeah,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1849.499,"endTime":1851.359,"body":"it's the old"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1849.499,"endTime":1851.359,"body":"school term, we call it Jim, I"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1851.359,"endTime":1851.749,"body":"guess."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1852.379,"endTime":1854.269,"body":"I just remember"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1852.379,"endTime":1854.269,"body":"when we get in change, one of"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1854.269,"endTime":1857.059,"body":"the kids get in, you know,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1854.269,"endTime":1857.059,"body":"people used to say wail time and"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1857.059,"endTime":1860.539,"body":"people would slap his stomach."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1857.059,"endTime":1860.539,"body":"And I remember that sent a very"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1861.919,"endTime":1867.049,"body":"sharp message to me as sort of"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1861.919,"endTime":1867.049,"body":"developing teenagers, like, if"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1867.049,"endTime":1870.349,"body":"you are fat, you will get rid of"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1867.049,"endTime":1870.349,"body":"cured and at that time, I was"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1870.349,"endTime":1874.549,"body":"very, very fat. And I was like,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1870.349,"endTime":1874.549,"body":"I want to blend in. I want to be"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1874.549,"endTime":1878.479,"body":"part of the NGO. I want to be,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1874.549,"endTime":1878.479,"body":"you know, part of the wallpaper,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1878.479,"endTime":1884.239,"body":"I don't want that sort of"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1878.479,"endTime":1884.239,"body":"negative attention. So for me,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1884.239,"endTime":1889.699,"body":"actually, the disorder was more"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1884.239,"endTime":1889.699,"body":"about fitting in and trying to"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1889.699,"endTime":1894.919,"body":"fit in with people, whereas I"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1889.699,"endTime":1894.919,"body":"felt like a big, fat sore thumb."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1895.94,"endTime":1898.88,"body":"Do you think you"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1895.94,"endTime":1898.88,"body":"were just like fat by society"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1898.88,"endTime":1902.0,"body":"standards? Or were you fat?"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1898.88,"endTime":1902.0,"body":"Like, what would what a doctor"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1902.0,"endTime":1903.59,"body":"say you were overweight? Oh,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1902.0,"endTime":1903.59,"body":"God."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1903.59,"endTime":1907.7,"body":"Yes. I mean,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1903.59,"endTime":1907.7,"body":"unfortunately, and I the data,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1907.76,"endTime":1910.25,"body":"they'll never say this. But my"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1907.76,"endTime":1910.25,"body":"mom and dad had a very weird"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1910.25,"endTime":1914.87,"body":"relationship with food. And"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1910.25,"endTime":1914.87,"body":"they. Yeah,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1914.87,"endTime":1917.3,"body":"it has to start"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1914.87,"endTime":1917.3,"body":"somewhere. Right? Well, I"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1917.3,"endTime":1919.52,"body":"mean, I didn't"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1917.3,"endTime":1919.52,"body":"realize until you know, you get"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1919.52,"endTime":1922.64,"body":"a fresh set of eyes on this. But"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1919.52,"endTime":1922.64,"body":"you know, bringing my girlfriend"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1922.64,"endTime":1925.94,"body":"back into cheese, the chocolates"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1922.64,"endTime":1925.94,"body":"around there's, there's"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1925.94,"endTime":1930.05,"body":"chocolates, there's sweets,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1925.94,"endTime":1930.05,"body":"there's sugary bits is a single"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1930.05,"endTime":1935.48,"body":"piece of fruit in sight. And"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1930.05,"endTime":1935.48,"body":"food was my parents grew up, off"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1935.48,"endTime":1940.13,"body":"the back of rationing off the"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1935.48,"endTime":1940.13,"body":"back of World War Two. So food"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1940.16,"endTime":1944.39,"body":"equals love equals celebration."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1940.16,"endTime":1944.39,"body":"And then as society changed,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1944.39,"endTime":1947.6,"body":"food became much, much, much,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1944.39,"endTime":1947.6,"body":"much, much cheaper. So those"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1947.6,"endTime":1951.02,"body":"things that mom and dad, when"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1947.6,"endTime":1951.02,"body":"they grew up with me of"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1951.17,"endTime":1954.83,"body":"chocolate, have expensive exotic"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1951.17,"endTime":1954.83,"body":"things. Those will be like, Oh"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1954.83,"endTime":1957.14,"body":"my God, we only had this at"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1954.83,"endTime":1957.14,"body":"Christmas, whereas they could"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1957.14,"endTime":1962.24,"body":"have been, you know, seven days"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1957.14,"endTime":1962.24,"body":"a week, 52 weeks? a year. So it"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1962.24,"endTime":1966.23,"body":"became a sort of thing that food"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1962.24,"endTime":1966.23,"body":"was always around and always"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1966.23,"endTime":1969.44,"body":"pushed in. Yeah, I mean, yeah,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1966.23,"endTime":1969.44,"body":"people used to joke I mean, I"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1969.44,"endTime":1971.87,"body":"still meet over the one of my"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1969.44,"endTime":1971.87,"body":"mates, ironically, is a doctor"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1971.87,"endTime":1976.04,"body":"now but always used to draw me"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1971.87,"endTime":1976.04,"body":"as a picture of a bloke with a"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1976.04,"endTime":1978.77,"body":"little basketball body. That's"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1976.04,"endTime":1978.77,"body":"the sort of level that was okay,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1978.77,"endTime":1980.48,"body":"no. Hmm."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1980.96,"endTime":1984.02,"body":"Yeah, I think food"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1980.96,"endTime":1984.02,"body":"is like a symbol of affluence,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1984.02,"endTime":1987.89,"body":"or maybe like generosity, like"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1984.02,"endTime":1987.89,"body":"you're welcoming people into"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1987.89,"endTime":1991.94,"body":"your home, say a long time. So"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1987.89,"endTime":1991.94,"body":"it has all these associations,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1991.94,"endTime":1994.79,"body":"and then it could end up harming"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1991.94,"endTime":1994.79,"body":"you, if you see it the wrong"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1994.79,"endTime":1995.18,"body":"way."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1995.63,"endTime":1999.11,"body":"Oh, absolutely."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1995.63,"endTime":1999.11,"body":"And if that is the case, if you"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1999.11,"endTime":2002.23,"body":"know sort of food is used to"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":1999.11,"endTime":2002.23,"body":"sort of like, you know, keep"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2002.23,"endTime":2005.86,"body":"people then Jesus, my mom was"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2002.23,"endTime":2005.86,"body":"preparing for a nuclear winter."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2005.86,"endTime":2006.91,"body":"I mean, crap, she"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2006.91,"endTime":2008.08,"body":"did not want you to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2006.91,"endTime":2008.08,"body":"leave."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2008.77,"endTime":2011.89,"body":"If the a bomb goes"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2008.77,"endTime":2011.89,"body":"off, Jesus, you could live there"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2011.89,"endTime":2015.37,"body":"for years. I mean, you go into"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2011.89,"endTime":2015.37,"body":"that pantry, and it was like"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2015.37,"endTime":2016.21,"body":"Costco."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2018.1,"endTime":2020.26,"body":"Were you like, did"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2018.1,"endTime":2020.26,"body":"you have siblings? Or was it"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2020.26,"endTime":2021.1,"body":"just you at home?"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2021.939,"endTime":2025.659,"body":"So I had to I have"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2021.939,"endTime":2025.659,"body":"an older sisters that four years"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2025.659,"endTime":2030.369,"body":"older than me, and I suppose I"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2025.659,"endTime":2030.369,"body":"don't want to like really talk"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2030.369,"endTime":2034.779,"body":"too much. Because I suppose that"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2030.369,"endTime":2034.779,"body":"sort of, yeah, I"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2034.78,"endTime":2036.01,"body":"was just"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2034.78,"endTime":2036.01,"body":"wondering, like, Is your mom"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2036.01,"endTime":2038.89,"body":"preparing for other kids? Or is"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2036.01,"endTime":2038.89,"body":"it just you?"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2039.34,"endTime":2041.02,"body":"I mean, it was"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2039.34,"endTime":2041.02,"body":"like the, you know, don't make a"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2041.02,"endTime":2043.96,"body":"joke of it. But it was like the"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2041.02,"endTime":2043.96,"body":"feeding of the 5000s. You know,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2043.96,"endTime":2047.5,"body":"you'd come out with just the,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2043.96,"endTime":2047.5,"body":"the amount and the amount of"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2047.5,"endTime":2052.87,"body":"butter. And yeah, I mean, now"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2047.5,"endTime":2052.87,"body":"that I come out and like try to"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2052.87,"endTime":2056.08,"body":"have a healthier relationship"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2052.87,"endTime":2056.08,"body":"with food and equally, not not"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2056.08,"endTime":2061.45,"body":"blaming or shaming anyone, but"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2056.08,"endTime":2061.45,"body":"you do kind of, you know, I"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2061.45,"endTime":2064.6,"body":"don't blame my parents in any"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2061.45,"endTime":2064.6,"body":"way, shape or form for my eating"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2064.6,"endTime":2069.16,"body":"disorder. Nobody chooses to have"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2064.6,"endTime":2069.16,"body":"a mental illness, but you do"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2069.16,"endTime":2072.16,"body":"have a responsibility to get"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2069.16,"endTime":2072.16,"body":"better. And I share that"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2072.16,"endTime":2076.3,"body":"responsibility for a long, long"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2072.16,"endTime":2076.3,"body":"time. And now you know, because"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2076.3,"endTime":2078.55,"body":"of all the stuff that I've had"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2076.3,"endTime":2078.55,"body":"and I'm really lucky to have a"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2078.55,"endTime":2081.73,"body":"drone to pay that forward in"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2078.55,"endTime":2081.73,"body":"order to help people find those"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2081.97,"endTime":2084.67,"body":"communication tools in order to"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2081.97,"endTime":2084.67,"body":"explain what's going on in your"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2084.67,"endTime":2085.87,"body":"brain box."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2087.64,"endTime":2090.31,"body":"And your sounds"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2087.64,"endTime":2090.31,"body":"like your mom was like really"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2090.31,"endTime":2093.04,"body":"trying to help you get better"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2090.31,"endTime":2093.04,"body":"because she calls you out for"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2093.04,"endTime":2096.16,"body":"being anorexic and wanted you to"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2093.04,"endTime":2096.16,"body":"get help. So she she was clearly"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2096.16,"endTime":2098.2,"body":"like, trying to help"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2098.2,"endTime":2101.2,"body":"you at some point."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2098.2,"endTime":2101.2,"body":"Definitely. And I also think"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2101.2,"endTime":2104.71,"body":"there's a developmental issue"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2101.2,"endTime":2104.71,"body":"here. You know, mom was, yeah,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2104.71,"endTime":2110.59,"body":"she was the cook, and she always"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2104.71,"endTime":2110.59,"body":"feed and stuff. And also, I sort"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2110.59,"endTime":2114.19,"body":"of perhaps felt, perhaps,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2110.59,"endTime":2114.19,"body":"rightly or wrongly, that perhaps"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2114.19,"endTime":2118.9,"body":"at certain points, a little bit"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2114.19,"endTime":2118.9,"body":"too much of a hand on the old"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2118.9,"endTime":2122.08,"body":"tiller of my life, and I wanted"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2118.9,"endTime":2122.08,"body":"to take control. And actually,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2122.23,"endTime":2125.86,"body":"by restricting the input that"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2122.23,"endTime":2125.86,"body":"she gave, she was the feeder,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2126.04,"endTime":2129.31,"body":"and I was the fidi by actually"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2126.04,"endTime":2129.31,"body":"cutting off that that was taking"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2129.31,"endTime":2134.08,"body":"control so that on an insidious"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2129.31,"endTime":2134.08,"body":"level is me sort of standing on"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2134.08,"endTime":2136.03,"body":"my own firm fee."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2136.96,"endTime":2139.84,"body":"Yeah, that's some"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2136.96,"endTime":2139.84,"body":"psychology coming at you."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2140.38,"endTime":2143.26,"body":"This is a this is"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2140.38,"endTime":2143.26,"body":"what I've been told by, again."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2144.34,"endTime":2145.24,"body":"Just a professional."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2146.35,"endTime":2150.7,"body":"Yeah. Its tracks."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2146.35,"endTime":2150.7,"body":"I think it tracks. Do you want"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2150.7,"endTime":2154.03,"body":"to talk about your I don't know"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2150.7,"endTime":2154.03,"body":"if it would be a rock bottom,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2154.03,"endTime":2158.74,"body":"but like the time you went to"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2154.03,"endTime":2158.74,"body":"the hospital, when you like, had"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2158.74,"endTime":2159.61,"body":"too much coffee?"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2159.97,"endTime":2163.09,"body":"Oh, right. Well,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2159.97,"endTime":2163.09,"body":"the coffee thing was still when"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2163.09,"endTime":2165.97,"body":"I was sort of developing, I"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2163.09,"endTime":2165.97,"body":"suppose my, my actual rock"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2165.97,"endTime":2169.66,"body":"bottom. And here's the thing and"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2165.97,"endTime":2169.66,"body":"it funny, was actually, when I"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2169.66,"endTime":2173.68,"body":"started talking about I are very"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2169.66,"endTime":2173.68,"body":"lucky that I sort of started"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2173.68,"endTime":2177.64,"body":"doing this show about it, which"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2173.68,"endTime":2177.64,"body":"is brilliant, it's nice. And I"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2177.64,"endTime":2181.96,"body":"went up to the Edinburgh Fringe"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2177.64,"endTime":2181.96,"body":"and got very nice reviews. And"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2181.96,"endTime":2185.05,"body":"then I was very lucky. And I've"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2181.96,"endTime":2185.05,"body":"got a ward at the Houses of"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2185.05,"endTime":2187.75,"body":"Parliament, which was brilliant"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2185.05,"endTime":2187.75,"body":"and amazing. And it kind of then"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2187.75,"endTime":2191.32,"body":"went on tour. But what was the"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2187.75,"endTime":2191.32,"body":"weird thing was after the tour"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2191.32,"endTime":2194.08,"body":"shows, people will come up to"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2191.32,"endTime":2194.08,"body":"me, and they will tell me about"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2194.08,"endTime":2199.09,"body":"people that were ill than I was"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2194.08,"endTime":2199.09,"body":"or thinner than I was or do more"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2199.09,"endTime":2202.99,"body":"exercise than I was, and I kind"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2199.09,"endTime":2202.99,"body":"of became feeling like a fraud"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2202.99,"endTime":2206.38,"body":"of like, I'm not anorexic"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2202.99,"endTime":2206.38,"body":"enough. Here I am saying I had"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2206.38,"endTime":2210.37,"body":"anorexia, I'd never got"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2206.38,"endTime":2210.37,"body":"treatment for rare and I"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2210.46,"endTime":2215.35,"body":"essentially created a rods from"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2210.46,"endTime":2215.35,"body":"my own back. So I became very"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2215.35,"endTime":2219.04,"body":"open in my relapse in and it was"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2215.35,"endTime":2219.04,"body":"very clear as well, at the time"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2219.04,"endTime":2223.9,"body":"that it was a suicide attempt."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2219.04,"endTime":2223.9,"body":"So that, you know, I'd started"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2223.9,"endTime":2228.16,"body":"writing the letters for after I"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2223.9,"endTime":2228.16,"body":"was gone. And I'd stayed sort of"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2228.16,"endTime":2231.43,"body":"writing while I'm my you know,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2228.16,"endTime":2231.43,"body":"my bank details and stuff so"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2231.43,"endTime":2233.95,"body":"that when I died, people can"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2231.43,"endTime":2233.95,"body":"find them, because I knew that"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2233.95,"endTime":2237.34,"body":"anorexia was, has the highest"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2233.95,"endTime":2237.34,"body":"mortality rate of any mental"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2237.34,"endTime":2240.76,"body":"illness. So I'd like to sort of"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2237.34,"endTime":2240.76,"body":"speed that up. But the one thing"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2240.76,"endTime":2246.61,"body":"I didn't see come in, was the"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2240.76,"endTime":2246.61,"body":"depression. And it was that that"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2246.61,"endTime":2250.99,"body":"I went to the doctor's for that"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2246.61,"endTime":2250.99,"body":"I was like, Look, I constantly"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2250.99,"endTime":2253.96,"body":"feel rubbish. I'm self"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2250.99,"endTime":2253.96,"body":"medicating with far too much"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2253.96,"endTime":2256.36,"body":"drink, if you get what I mean,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2253.96,"endTime":2256.36,"body":"I've started taking other"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2256.36,"endTime":2260.08,"body":"illicit substances. And then I"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2256.36,"endTime":2260.08,"body":"got referred at the chain. And"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2260.08,"endTime":2265.33,"body":"without monitor login, the only"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2260.08,"endTime":2265.33,"body":"reason that I didn't follow"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2265.33,"endTime":2269.2,"body":"through with the plan was a"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2265.33,"endTime":2269.2,"body":"really annoyed and frustrated"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2269.2,"endTime":2273.01,"body":"nurse got the end of a tether"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2269.2,"endTime":2273.01,"body":"with me and bless her, she went"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2273.01,"endTime":2276.61,"body":"look, bottom line, you wouldn't"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2273.01,"endTime":2276.61,"body":"expect your laptop to work if"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2276.61,"endTime":2280.63,"body":"you don't charge it. You can't"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2276.61,"endTime":2280.63,"body":"expect your brain to release"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2280.69,"endTime":2284.38,"body":"these feel good chemicals if you"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2280.69,"endTime":2284.38,"body":"don't feed it. That's why you're"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2284.38,"endTime":2288.79,"body":"depressed. And I was like, we're"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2284.38,"endTime":2288.79,"body":"into an idiot. That was like,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2288.91,"endTime":2289.75,"body":"amazing."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2290.38,"endTime":2293.44,"body":"That's the analogy"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2290.38,"endTime":2293.44,"body":"that that resonated with you."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2293.68,"endTime":2296.65,"body":"Well, up until"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2293.68,"endTime":2296.65,"body":"that point, you know, I was"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2296.92,"endTime":2300.16,"body":"Boogaloo at that point, you"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2296.92,"endTime":2300.16,"body":"know, I was I couldn't"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2300.16,"endTime":2305.2,"body":"concentrate, I'd got no memory."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2300.16,"endTime":2305.2,"body":"I was very irritable all of the"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2305.2,"endTime":2309.73,"body":"time. And on a baseline of like,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2305.2,"endTime":2309.73,"body":"I'm like a bear with a sore ass"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2309.73,"endTime":2314.83,"body":"most of the time. It was"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2309.73,"endTime":2314.83,"body":"terrible. And I think actually,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2315.01,"endTime":2320.59,"body":"a real world intervention was"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2315.01,"endTime":2320.59,"body":"exactly what I needed someone to"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2320.59,"endTime":2323.74,"body":"be like, right? Cut the crap"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2320.59,"endTime":2323.74,"body":"bottom line. It's gonna happen,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2323.77,"endTime":2326.11,"body":"it's gonna get worse, you've got"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2323.77,"endTime":2326.11,"body":"a choice, you could die from"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2326.11,"endTime":2329.35,"body":"this. You're all you're gonna be"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2326.11,"endTime":2329.35,"body":"all alone. You pushing people"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2329.35,"endTime":2332.92,"body":"away, or you do the difficult"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2329.35,"endTime":2332.92,"body":"thing and face up to"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2334.48,"endTime":2337.66,"body":"Yeah, I've heard"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2334.48,"endTime":2337.66,"body":"that's really hard. The"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2337.72,"endTime":2340.51,"body":"recovering of the eating"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2337.72,"endTime":2340.51,"body":"disorder, like learning like you"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2340.51,"endTime":2343.42,"body":"actually have to start putting"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2340.51,"endTime":2343.42,"body":"food into your body. Otherwise,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2343.45,"endTime":2344.8,"body":"you know, the end is near."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2345.37,"endTime":2347.77,"body":"It's so it's"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2345.37,"endTime":2347.77,"body":"difficult in so many ways."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2347.77,"endTime":2352.84,"body":"Firstly, the weight gain, never"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2347.77,"endTime":2352.84,"body":"never tell anyone that you got"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2352.84,"endTime":2356.62,"body":"put on weight. Jesus, no one"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2352.84,"endTime":2356.62,"body":"likes that person. Oh, dear."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2356.62,"endTime":2360.61,"body":"It's hard. You know? Because"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2356.62,"endTime":2360.61,"body":"again, we live in a cultural"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2360.61,"endTime":2363.55,"body":"society where we're diversified"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2360.61,"endTime":2363.55,"body":"to be you know, like losing"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2363.55,"endTime":2366.88,"body":"weight is is good and putting on"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2363.55,"endTime":2366.88,"body":"weight, you know, sort of ours."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2367.21,"endTime":2369.94,"body":"So yeah, that we"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2367.21,"endTime":2369.94,"body":"have we've divided into good and"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2369.94,"endTime":2372.13,"body":"bad Computer Society."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2372.73,"endTime":2375.52,"body":"And it's odd that"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2372.73,"endTime":2375.52,"body":"like, I didn't know everything"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2375.52,"endTime":2378.43,"body":"from like, I didn't really I"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2375.52,"endTime":2378.43,"body":"couldn't really work out when I"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2378.43,"endTime":2381.61,"body":"was actually full or when I was"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2378.43,"endTime":2381.61,"body":"really hungry because I was so"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2381.61,"endTime":2386.02,"body":"out of tune with my body trying"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2381.61,"endTime":2386.02,"body":"to get rid of all of those sort"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2386.02,"endTime":2390.94,"body":"of safe foods and then things"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2386.02,"endTime":2390.94,"body":"like feeling warm again was so"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2390.94,"endTime":2395.86,"body":"weird because like my dad was"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2390.94,"endTime":2395.86,"body":"always so cold and I was so odd"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2395.86,"endTime":2398.41,"body":"and it was quite triggering as"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2395.86,"endTime":2398.41,"body":"well close associates sweating,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2398.41,"endTime":2401.86,"body":"wood, being fat. So it's"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2398.41,"endTime":2401.86,"body":"difficult. I think one of the"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2401.86,"endTime":2403.75,"body":"hardest things about recovery"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2401.86,"endTime":2403.75,"body":"was everyone talks about"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2403.75,"endTime":2406.99,"body":"recovery is taking the anorexia"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2403.75,"endTime":2406.99,"body":"away. No one talks about"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2406.99,"endTime":2411.58,"body":"recovery of giving anything"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2406.99,"endTime":2411.58,"body":"back. And so I was on a race to"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2411.58,"endTime":2414.37,"body":"the bottom as I saw it, and it's"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2411.58,"endTime":2414.37,"body":"only when I started to sort of"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2414.37,"endTime":2417.31,"body":"reframe that for myself and say,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2414.37,"endTime":2417.31,"body":"you know, what, instead of"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2417.31,"endTime":2421.45,"body":"seeing this as like, a losing"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2417.31,"endTime":2421.45,"body":"battle, so this is gaining that"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2421.57,"endTime":2425.8,"body":"attention span, gaining that"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2421.57,"endTime":2425.8,"body":"sense of humor, gaining that"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2425.83,"endTime":2430.45,"body":"reclaiming that sexuality. And"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2425.83,"endTime":2430.45,"body":"that could be fun. And I just"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2430.45,"endTime":2434.5,"body":"marked about three, I never had"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2430.45,"endTime":2434.5,"body":"a gap year, but I just dicked"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2434.5,"endTime":2436.6,"body":"about all that year, and it was"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2434.5,"endTime":2436.6,"body":"brilliant."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2437.559,"endTime":2441.129,"body":"So you were living"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2437.559,"endTime":2441.129,"body":"in brain fog, you were like"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2441.129,"endTime":2445.899,"body":"sustaining on very little"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2441.129,"endTime":2445.899,"body":"calories. And then some pissed"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2445.899,"endTime":2448.839,"body":"off nurse was like, Listen, you"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2445.899,"endTime":2448.839,"body":"have to charge your battery."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2448.839,"endTime":2451.749,"body":"Otherwise, you know, you're"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2448.839,"endTime":2451.749,"body":"gonna stay depressed. And you"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2451.749,"endTime":2458.859,"body":"were like, oh, okay, that makes"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2451.749,"endTime":2458.859,"body":"sense. Absolutely. Wow. And was."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2459.279,"endTime":2463.509,"body":"So just to explain the coffee"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2459.279,"endTime":2463.509,"body":"thing that was when you were"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2463.509,"endTime":2467.079,"body":"drinking coffee in replacement"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2463.509,"endTime":2467.079,"body":"of food. And that lowered your"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2467.109,"endTime":2468.219,"body":"heart rate. Is that right?"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2468.25,"endTime":2471.22,"body":"Yeah. So I don't"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2468.25,"endTime":2471.22,"body":"want to tap share, and you"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2471.22,"endTime":2474.4,"body":"shouldn't do this. And I'll"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2471.22,"endTime":2474.4,"body":"explain why bide style. One of"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2474.4,"endTime":2475.57,"body":"the unhealthy."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2476.23,"endTime":2478.12,"body":"Yeah, that's a tip"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2476.23,"endTime":2478.12,"body":"share, but more to like, warn"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2478.12,"endTime":2479.2,"body":"people don't do this."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2479.59,"endTime":2482.14,"body":"Yes. Because one"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2479.59,"endTime":2482.14,"body":"of the many things you can do,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2482.14,"endTime":2486.55,"body":"you start you start doing weird"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2482.14,"endTime":2486.55,"body":"shit. And I started replacing"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2486.55,"endTime":2489.37,"body":"food for coffee, because coffee"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2486.55,"endTime":2489.37,"body":"gives you energy, but it doesn't"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2489.37,"endTime":2491.8,"body":"give you the calories of food if"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2489.37,"endTime":2491.8,"body":"you drink, you know, sort of"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2492.16,"endTime":2497.47,"body":"black like oil, coffee. And the"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2492.16,"endTime":2497.47,"body":"problem is what I didn't realize"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2497.47,"endTime":2500.32,"body":"is that coffee can in some"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2497.47,"endTime":2500.32,"body":"people reduce your posts and"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2500.32,"endTime":2502.66,"body":"when you don't eat because"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2500.32,"endTime":2502.66,"body":"you've got none of that fuel in"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2502.66,"endTime":2506.56,"body":"your body that reduces your"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2502.66,"endTime":2506.56,"body":"posts to mine got down to about"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2506.56,"endTime":2510.7,"body":"40 it was 46 beats a minute. And"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2506.56,"endTime":2510.7,"body":"I started getting heart"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2510.7,"endTime":2513.46,"body":"palpitations, which is basically"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2510.7,"endTime":2513.46,"body":"where your heart skips a beat."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2513.46,"endTime":2519.01,"body":"And then the next one's bigger."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2513.46,"endTime":2519.01,"body":"And this just casts consistently"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2519.61,"endTime":2522.52,"body":"happening and the silly story"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2519.61,"endTime":2522.52,"body":"that I tell in the show, which"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2522.52,"endTime":2526.27,"body":"is true, but I you know, I ended"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2522.52,"endTime":2526.27,"body":"up in a\u0026e over this I ended up"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2526.27,"endTime":2529.81,"body":"talking to this bill though,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2526.27,"endTime":2529.81,"body":"like basically sawn off half his"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2529.81,"endTime":2533.26,"body":"leg, and we got chatting and"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2529.81,"endTime":2533.26,"body":"after a while he said, you know,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2533.38,"endTime":2536.62,"body":"anyway, you know why I'm here?"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2533.38,"endTime":2536.62,"body":"Why are you here? And there's"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2536.62,"endTime":2539.35,"body":"nothing more embarrassing than"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2536.62,"endTime":2539.35,"body":"looking at bloke who's bleeding"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2539.38,"endTime":2543.7,"body":"out of his lower body and go Why"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2539.38,"endTime":2543.7,"body":"am I out too much coffee may"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2544.39,"endTime":2548.95,"body":"look pretty trivial and like a"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2544.39,"endTime":2548.95,"body":"bit of a dig. But it is true"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2548.95,"endTime":2549.73,"body":"that I hear"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2549.73,"endTime":2552.01,"body":"about in the"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2549.73,"endTime":2552.01,"body":"hospital like swapping your"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2552.01,"endTime":2555.43,"body":"origin story. Some guy lost his"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2552.01,"endTime":2555.43,"body":"leg and you're like, I had too"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2555.43,"endTime":2556.12,"body":"much caffeine."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2557.62,"endTime":2560.32,"body":"Just like step"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2557.62,"endTime":2560.32,"body":"away from the nest calf. But"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2560.32,"endTime":2565.33,"body":"it's it is an odd thing. Again,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2560.32,"endTime":2565.33,"body":"the all of the signs and"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2565.33,"endTime":2568.6,"body":"symptoms that you can easily"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2565.33,"endTime":2568.6,"body":"mess of Yeah, like loads of"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2568.6,"endTime":2574.54,"body":"coffee, things I always point"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2568.6,"endTime":2574.54,"body":"out, feeling too cold, chewing,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2575.17,"endTime":2580.57,"body":"anxiety, very rigid thinking of"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2575.17,"endTime":2580.57,"body":"things being great or bad mood"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2580.57,"endTime":2583.9,"body":"swings, changes behavior,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2580.57,"endTime":2583.9,"body":"feeling and moving slower the"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2583.9,"endTime":2589.12,"body":"user all of these little things"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2583.9,"endTime":2589.12,"body":"can go so overlooked. But"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2589.45,"endTime":2593.83,"body":"really, again, smoking really"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2589.45,"endTime":2593.83,"body":"common one, if you ever go to"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2593.83,"endTime":2597.7,"body":"any rexy conference, the fat"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2593.83,"endTime":2597.7,"body":"breaks go on for God knows our"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2597.7,"endTime":2598.12,"body":"long."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2599.98,"endTime":2602.86,"body":"Yeah, I mean, I've"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2599.98,"endTime":2602.86,"body":"seen a lot of this like either"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2602.86,"endTime":2605.5,"body":"in my own life or like, you"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2602.86,"endTime":2605.5,"body":"know, witnessing other people"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2605.5,"endTime":2610.51,"body":"and it does resonate. What was"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2605.5,"endTime":2610.51,"body":"your step to get better when was"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2610.51,"endTime":2612.97,"body":"like, Where Where was there a"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2610.51,"endTime":2612.97,"body":"moment where you were like I'm"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2612.97,"endTime":2615.43,"body":"gonna start getting better by"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2612.97,"endTime":2615.43,"body":"doing this."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2616.179,"endTime":2617.619,"body":"Yeah, that's a"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2616.179,"endTime":2617.619,"body":"really interesting question"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2617.619,"endTime":2621.189,"body":"because I because I know how"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2617.619,"endTime":2621.189,"body":"resources are so stretched over"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2621.189,"endTime":2624.429,"body":"here and how lucky and truly"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2621.189,"endTime":2624.429,"body":"gifted I was to be able to not"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2624.429,"endTime":2632.019,"body":"gifted truly lucky, fortunate to"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2624.429,"endTime":2632.019,"body":"get on to treatment. I was like,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2632.049,"endTime":2635.649,"body":"I either don't do this or I do"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2632.049,"endTime":2635.649,"body":"this proper and I did it"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2635.649,"endTime":2642.759,"body":"properly. And I think I thought"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2635.649,"endTime":2642.759,"body":"I still remember my my therapist"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2642.759,"endTime":2645.699,"body":"to be on one says I still"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2642.759,"endTime":2645.699,"body":"remember one Thursday, March"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2645.699,"endTime":2652.659,"body":"back in 20. Gods it's got to go"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2645.699,"endTime":2652.659,"body":"2015 1415 of like stepping"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2652.659,"endTime":2655.569,"body":"outside and for the first time"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2652.659,"endTime":2655.569,"body":"being like Jesus, I feel like"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2655.569,"endTime":2664.089,"body":"the old Dave I feel like the pre"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2655.569,"endTime":2664.089,"body":"anorexic school days. Dave there"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2664.089,"endTime":2667.809,"body":"was actually more worried out"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2664.089,"endTime":2667.809,"body":"about you know, going and cagin"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2667.809,"endTime":2672.219,"body":"Johnno Parkinson, or you know,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2667.809,"endTime":2672.219,"body":"mucking about playing football"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2672.219,"endTime":2677.199,"body":"and that I think was my first"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2672.219,"endTime":2677.199,"body":"and it was a huge push to keep"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2677.199,"endTime":2681.159,"body":"me going. I've been I feel"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2677.199,"endTime":2681.159,"body":"silly. And I think we talked so"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2681.159,"endTime":2684.489,"body":"much about mental illness that"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2681.159,"endTime":2684.489,"body":"we actually really overlook"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2684.549,"endTime":2688.809,"body":"mental health and good mental"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2684.549,"endTime":2688.809,"body":"health and I think a huge"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2688.809,"endTime":2692.409,"body":"motivator is to say, what's good"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2688.809,"endTime":2692.409,"body":"mental health for you? And in"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2692.409,"endTime":2697.359,"body":"that moment, if that will window"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2692.409,"endTime":2697.359,"body":"day, the good mental health for"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2697.359,"endTime":2701.979,"body":"me was feeling like a kid again,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2697.359,"endTime":2701.979,"body":"in a Brilliant, stupid, silly"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2701.979,"endTime":2702.489,"body":"way."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2704.47,"endTime":2706.42,"body":"Like you're able"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2704.47,"endTime":2706.42,"body":"to think about other stuff"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2706.42,"endTime":2708.49,"body":"besides food and exercise."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2708.55,"endTime":2711.88,"body":"Yeah, and, and"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2708.55,"endTime":2711.88,"body":"like life was exciting rather"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2711.88,"endTime":2716.17,"body":"than intimidating and things"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2711.88,"endTime":2716.17,"body":"were funny, I got one of the"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2716.17,"endTime":2720.37,"body":"brilliant guys at school and I"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2716.17,"endTime":2720.37,"body":"just he was a walking talking"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2720.37,"endTime":2726.28,"body":"real life. And his name was Don."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2720.37,"endTime":2726.28,"body":"And he we grew up when jackass"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2726.28,"endTime":2731.2,"body":"was still around quite a lot."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2726.28,"endTime":2731.2,"body":"And Tom used to do ridiculous"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2731.23,"endTime":2735.01,"body":"stuff. And it didn't matter to"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2731.23,"endTime":2735.01,"body":"Tom, if it weren't right or"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2735.01,"endTime":2739.3,"body":"wrong, it was a story. It was an"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2735.01,"endTime":2739.3,"body":"adventure. And I was always"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2739.3,"endTime":2744.49,"body":"really envious of that. I know,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2739.3,"endTime":2744.49,"body":"remember thinking as I just that"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2744.79,"endTime":2748.12,"body":"therapy that yeah, I think Donna"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2744.79,"endTime":2748.12,"body":"got it right all along nicely."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2748.42,"endTime":2751.69,"body":"It doesn't matter about your"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2748.42,"endTime":2751.69,"body":"bank balance, or the numbers on"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2751.69,"endTime":2755.65,"body":"your scale, it is an adventure"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2751.69,"endTime":2755.65,"body":"to actually genuinely, truly"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2755.65,"endTime":2759.97,"body":"feel that and equally as well to"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2755.65,"endTime":2759.97,"body":"give lip service to the fact"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2759.97,"endTime":2763.3,"body":"that like, I'm not saying that"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2759.97,"endTime":2763.3,"body":"I've been, you know, shitting"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2763.3,"endTime":2765.61,"body":"happiness ever since. And that,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2763.3,"endTime":2765.61,"body":"you know, every day"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2766.81,"endTime":2768.73,"body":"I heard that"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2766.81,"endTime":2768.73,"body":"phrase before. It's Yeah,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2768.73,"endTime":2771.76,"body":"it's not like I'm"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2768.73,"endTime":2771.76,"body":"walking on sunshine every single"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2771.76,"endTime":2775.75,"body":"day, obviously. There's tough"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2771.76,"endTime":2775.75,"body":"days and stuff. But I think it's"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2775.75,"endTime":2778.27,"body":"really important to celebrate"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2775.75,"endTime":2778.27,"body":"those little wins wherever they"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2778.27,"endTime":2778.72,"body":"come."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2779.77,"endTime":2782.35,"body":"So it sounds like"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2779.77,"endTime":2782.35,"body":"therapy was a big asset. And in"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2782.35,"endTime":2783.13,"body":"your recovery"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2783.43,"endTime":2786.22,"body":"therapy was the"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2783.43,"endTime":2786.22,"body":"groundwork the bedrock The most"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2786.22,"endTime":2790.12,"body":"important thing. And it was, it"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2786.22,"endTime":2790.12,"body":"was useful for a number of"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2790.12,"endTime":2792.37,"body":"different reasons. One is to"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2790.12,"endTime":2792.37,"body":"have a professional that could"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2792.37,"endTime":2796.24,"body":"guide that conversation into,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2792.37,"endTime":2796.24,"body":"right. Okay, now you just list"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2796.24,"endTime":2799.6,"body":"in foods, this an app for like,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2796.24,"endTime":2799.6,"body":"let's just steer this back to"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2799.6,"endTime":2802.72,"body":"something a bit more"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2799.6,"endTime":2802.72,"body":"constructed. So to have someone"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2802.72,"endTime":2809.14,"body":"to stare that tab someone to"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2802.72,"endTime":2809.14,"body":"give their insight as well was"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2809.29,"endTime":2813.46,"body":"really, really useful. And also,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2809.29,"endTime":2813.46,"body":"I'm just gonna say it won't make"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2813.46,"endTime":2816.55,"body":"me popular and people don't like"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2813.46,"endTime":2816.55,"body":"it. Have someone to believe me."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2816.97,"endTime":2820.51,"body":"To have someone. Yeah. Hey, you."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2816.97,"endTime":2820.51,"body":"You know what I do think you"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2820.51,"endTime":2823.57,"body":"have anorexia. I don't see you"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2820.51,"endTime":2823.57,"body":"making this up."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2824.41,"endTime":2826.66,"body":"And someone on"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2824.41,"endTime":2826.66,"body":"your side to someone who's not"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2826.66,"endTime":2829.06,"body":"trying to blame you for"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2826.66,"endTime":2829.06,"body":"anything?"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2829.48,"endTime":2832.78,"body":"Yes, I think that"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2829.48,"endTime":2832.78,"body":"was, that was great and"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2832.78,"endTime":2838.48,"body":"invaluable and brilliant. And I"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2832.78,"endTime":2838.48,"body":"was just so lucky. The therapist"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2838.48,"endTime":2842.71,"body":"that I got was a right old"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2838.48,"endTime":2842.71,"body":"laugh, and she was brilliant."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2842.71,"endTime":2846.88,"body":"And we add some genuinely, I had"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2842.71,"endTime":2846.88,"body":"so much great time I used to I"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2846.88,"endTime":2849.82,"body":"look forward to, cuz I thought"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2846.88,"endTime":2849.82,"body":"it was like in the States when"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2849.82,"endTime":2853.51,"body":"they're in the UK. So it's"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2849.82,"endTime":2853.51,"body":"therapy. Whenever I say I love"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2853.51,"endTime":2858.28,"body":"it, people like he will write"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2853.51,"endTime":2858.28,"body":"me. It's just it's seen as"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2858.28,"endTime":2861.52,"body":"something that you know, you"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2858.28,"endTime":2861.52,"body":"you're either meant to dread, or"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2861.52,"endTime":2864.19,"body":"you're meant to be done and out."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2861.52,"endTime":2864.19,"body":"But I was like, No, I'm like a"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2864.19,"endTime":2866.44,"body":"dog with two decks here. This is"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2864.19,"endTime":2866.44,"body":"brilliant."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2866.98,"endTime":2870.1,"body":"Yeah, that's so"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2866.98,"endTime":2870.1,"body":"funny. I think it really is"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2870.34,"endTime":2874.3,"body":"heavily stigmatized in America."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2870.34,"endTime":2874.3,"body":"It's only because I live in Los"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2874.3,"endTime":2877.18,"body":"Angeles. Now I feel like it's so"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2874.3,"endTime":2877.18,"body":"prevalent in Los Angeles,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2877.18,"endTime":2880.78,"body":"because we're all woowoo. And"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2877.18,"endTime":2880.78,"body":"like, celebrity culture, it's a"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2880.78,"endTime":2883.78,"body":"different world here. But like I"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2880.78,"endTime":2883.78,"body":"came from New York, and even in"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2883.78,"endTime":2886.66,"body":"New York, it felt much more"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2883.78,"endTime":2886.66,"body":"difficult to talk about."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2887.35,"endTime":2889.69,"body":"So that's, that is"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2887.35,"endTime":2889.69,"body":"interesting. And this is what"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2889.69,"endTime":2894.19,"body":"gets me is, especially in our"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2889.69,"endTime":2894.19,"body":"school system that we have, we"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2894.19,"endTime":2897.85,"body":"have physical education, as"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2894.19,"endTime":2897.85,"body":"mentioned earlier on mental"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2898.36,"endTime":2902.8,"body":"education. And actually, I think"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2898.36,"endTime":2902.8,"body":"that kind of is making a lot of"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2902.86,"endTime":2906.76,"body":"problems further down the tracks"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2902.86,"endTime":2906.76,"body":"of, you know, the thing that"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2906.76,"endTime":2910.3,"body":"everyone always says about men's"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2906.76,"endTime":2910.3,"body":"health is, you know, just talk"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2910.3,"endTime":2912.82,"body":"to someone and that's, you know,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2910.3,"endTime":2912.82,"body":"that's lovely. And that's all"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2912.82,"endTime":2916.36,"body":"well and good. But what happens"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2912.82,"endTime":2916.36,"body":"if you die of the word? Yeah,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2916.6,"endTime":2920.02,"body":"being a bloke, you know, we"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2916.6,"endTime":2920.02,"body":"don't have as much vocational,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2920.05,"endTime":2922.81,"body":"you know, their emotional"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2920.05,"endTime":2922.81,"body":"vocabulary because you know"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2922.81,"endTime":2925.93,"body":"what, like, there are still"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2922.81,"endTime":2925.93,"body":"those hangovers of gender norms"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2925.93,"endTime":2929.29,"body":"that women are the carers men"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2925.93,"endTime":2929.29,"body":"are the fixes. So trying to"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2929.29,"endTime":2931.81,"body":"explain what's going on in my"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2929.29,"endTime":2931.81,"body":"mindset, trying to explain a"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2931.81,"endTime":2936.1,"body":"color to someone who's blind,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2931.81,"endTime":2936.1,"body":"and that actually compounded"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2936.1,"endTime":2938.29,"body":"with the fact that one of the"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2936.1,"endTime":2938.29,"body":"first diagnostic criteria for"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2938.29,"endTime":2941.62,"body":"pretty much any mental illness"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2938.29,"endTime":2941.62,"body":"is an inability to communicate"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2941.62,"endTime":2946.51,"body":"because the cerebral cortex"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2941.62,"endTime":2946.51,"body":"stops firing all of the"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2946.51,"endTime":2950.2,"body":"different. I don't know what"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2946.51,"endTime":2950.2,"body":"they are. To be honest, I"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2950.2,"endTime":2952.12,"body":"started as soon as I've got a"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2950.2,"endTime":2952.12,"body":"clearer"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2952.12,"endTime":2953.98,"body":"transmitters or"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2952.12,"endTime":2953.98,"body":"something like that."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2954.34,"endTime":2957.43,"body":"So my lie that the"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2954.34,"endTime":2957.43,"body":"cerebral cortex goes on all the"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2957.43,"endTime":2962.47,"body":"day and goes to Western super"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2957.43,"endTime":2962.47,"body":"mare as a lovely time. So"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2962.47,"endTime":2967.09,"body":"actually, it's really, really"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2962.47,"endTime":2967.09,"body":"difficult to talk about this"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2967.09,"endTime":2971.65,"body":"stuff. And I think if people"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2967.09,"endTime":2971.65,"body":"started seeing therapy as like a"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2971.65,"endTime":2974.68,"body":"gym for the mind, like the"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2971.65,"endTime":2974.68,"body":"ancient Greeks did the body in"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2974.68,"endTime":2978.58,"body":"the mind, and you know, you"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2974.68,"endTime":2978.58,"body":"don't have to be unfit to go to"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2978.58,"endTime":2982.42,"body":"the gym. You don't have to be"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2978.58,"endTime":2982.42,"body":"unwell to look after your mental"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":2982.42,"endTime":2982.96,"body":"health."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2984.1,"endTime":2987.07,"body":"Yeah, I wish they"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2984.1,"endTime":2987.07,"body":"did teach it more in school"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2987.07,"endTime":2990.7,"body":"because when you I don't know"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2987.07,"endTime":2990.7,"body":"how your health education was in"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2990.7,"endTime":2994.6,"body":"school, but for us, it was like,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2990.7,"endTime":2994.6,"body":"one chapter is about physical"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2994.6,"endTime":2996.97,"body":"mental, emotional health and"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2994.6,"endTime":2996.97,"body":"like, you know, that mental"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2996.97,"endTime":3001.08,"body":"parts 1/3 of the chapter. It's"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2996.97,"endTime":3001.08,"body":"very fractioned Until, like, you"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3001.08,"endTime":3003.3,"body":"know, we're gonna talk about"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3001.08,"endTime":3003.3,"body":"this briefly, but it's not"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3003.3,"endTime":3003.81,"body":"important"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3004.38,"endTime":3006.66,"body":"that we didn't"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3004.38,"endTime":3006.66,"body":"even have that. And I still"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3006.66,"endTime":3011.73,"body":"remember growing up in the 90s."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3006.66,"endTime":3011.73,"body":"And it was very commonplace for,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3012.99,"endTime":3016.44,"body":"you know, as soon as I was, you"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3012.99,"endTime":3016.44,"body":"know, a murder in this sort of,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3016.44,"endTime":3019.44,"body":"you know, within 100 miles for"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3016.44,"endTime":3019.44,"body":"hours, because he's crazy and"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3019.74,"endTime":3023.67,"body":"the sun used to print headlines,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3019.74,"endTime":3023.67,"body":"and like when Frank Bruno came"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3023.67,"endTime":3026.19,"body":"out and said, I've got a mental"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3023.67,"endTime":3026.19,"body":"illness, the front page of the"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3026.19,"endTime":3033.51,"body":"film was bonkers, Bruno, and all"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3026.19,"endTime":3033.51,"body":"bonkers, Bruno, just so mad,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3033.51,"endTime":3033.84,"body":"it's gonna"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3033.84,"endTime":3035.97,"body":"sell some papers."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3033.84,"endTime":3035.97,"body":"It's just"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3036.0,"endTime":3039.99,"body":"and some of the"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3036.0,"endTime":3039.99,"body":"things that you use, you see"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3040.62,"endTime":3045.36,"body":"where it was kind of like really"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3040.62,"endTime":3045.36,"body":"like, Oh, God. But I think,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3045.39,"endTime":3049.53,"body":"again, I couldn't. We've never"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3045.39,"endTime":3049.53,"body":"been better at mental health in"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3049.53,"endTime":3052.53,"body":"the history of the world. How"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3049.53,"endTime":3052.53,"body":"exciting is that? And despite"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3052.53,"endTime":3056.1,"body":"all of the despair, and the down"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3052.53,"endTime":3056.1,"body":"ness and the worry in the work,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3056.25,"endTime":3059.46,"body":"I think the fact that we never"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3056.25,"endTime":3059.46,"body":"been better at mental health is"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3059.46,"endTime":3062.7,"body":"such an incredible thing. And"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3059.46,"endTime":3062.7,"body":"I'm not saying the race is one"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3062.7,"endTime":3064.98,"body":"i'm not saying right, let's give"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3062.7,"endTime":3064.98,"body":"up. It's all equal. Because I"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3064.98,"endTime":3069.42,"body":"know that's not the case. But I"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3064.98,"endTime":3069.42,"body":"just think it's also, you know,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3069.42,"endTime":3071.79,"body":"credit where credit's due and we"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3069.42,"endTime":3071.79,"body":"are getting better."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3072.6,"endTime":3075.03,"body":"Yeah, we're, I"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3072.6,"endTime":3075.03,"body":"think vastly improving from"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3075.03,"endTime":3079.05,"body":"like, what I felt as a kid or a"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3075.03,"endTime":3079.05,"body":"teenager, what I felt five years"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3079.05,"endTime":3083.1,"body":"ago, feels a lot easier now. So"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3079.05,"endTime":3083.1,"body":"we are on some trajectory"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3083.1,"endTime":3087.51,"body":"upward. And then talking about"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3083.1,"endTime":3087.51,"body":"it more will help, you know,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3087.69,"endTime":3092.58,"body":"telling people therapy helps"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3087.69,"endTime":3092.58,"body":"talk to someone and not telling"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3092.58,"endTime":3095.25,"body":"people they're crazy is a good"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3092.58,"endTime":3095.25,"body":"way forward."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3095.7,"endTime":3098.31,"body":"What is this stand"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3095.7,"endTime":3098.31,"body":"on the shoulders of giants"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3098.31,"endTime":3102.0,"body":"thing? of like, you know, you"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3098.31,"endTime":3102.0,"body":"hear someone talking about"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3102.0,"endTime":3104.31,"body":"something local will like that"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3102.0,"endTime":3104.31,"body":"better like that be? That's a"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3104.31,"endTime":3106.71,"body":"good idea. That's a good idea."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3104.31,"endTime":3106.71,"body":"And then you start saying that,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3106.71,"endTime":3109.44,"body":"so what else is there? Well, a"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3106.71,"endTime":3109.44,"body":"lot of that a lot of that ban,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3109.44,"endTime":3113.79,"body":"it just kind of, you know, boats"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3109.44,"endTime":3113.79,"body":"rise with the tide. And I kind"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3113.79,"endTime":3117.9,"body":"of feel that everyone's sort of"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3113.79,"endTime":3117.9,"body":"doing that with mental health"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3117.93,"endTime":3120.93,"body":"that actually, you know, sort of"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3117.93,"endTime":3120.93,"body":"by working collaboratively"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3120.93,"endTime":3126.51,"body":"rather than competitively."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3120.93,"endTime":3126.51,"body":"Hopefully, it helps other people"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3126.51,"endTime":3129.48,"body":"and again, changes that tone."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3126.51,"endTime":3129.48,"body":"And I think that's one of the"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3129.48,"endTime":3132.0,"body":"biggest problems we've got with"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3129.48,"endTime":3132.0,"body":"mental health at the moment is"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3132.3,"endTime":3136.08,"body":"doing stuff in schools now. You"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3132.3,"endTime":3136.08,"body":"know, I go into schools and so"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3136.08,"endTime":3138.21,"body":"on. So you know, we're going to"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3136.08,"endTime":3138.21,"body":"talk about mental health and"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3138.21,"endTime":3140.7,"body":"people aren't Jesus, none of"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3138.21,"endTime":3140.7,"body":"this sob story, you know,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3140.85,"endTime":3146.88,"body":"they're ready for, you know,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3140.85,"endTime":3146.88,"body":"doom and gloom, whereas"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3146.91,"endTime":3150.69,"body":"Actually, that's only half of"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3146.91,"endTime":3150.69,"body":"the story. So why are we only"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3150.69,"endTime":3153.69,"body":"telling half the story? Yet, to"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3153.69,"endTime":3156.15,"body":"me, I always was"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3153.69,"endTime":3156.15,"body":"drawn to psychology because it's"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3156.15,"endTime":3159.51,"body":"so fascinating. Like, it seems"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3156.15,"endTime":3159.51,"body":"like endless stuff. You could"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3159.51,"endTime":3163.65,"body":"learn about the minds. But you"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3159.51,"endTime":3163.65,"body":"have to put that in your head"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3163.65,"endTime":3166.74,"body":"like, no, this is actually"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3163.65,"endTime":3166.74,"body":"interesting. We can learn from"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3166.74,"endTime":3169.44,"body":"this. It's not something to make"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3166.74,"endTime":3169.44,"body":"bad or criticize."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3169.829,"endTime":3173.309,"body":"Oh, absolutely."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3169.829,"endTime":3173.309,"body":"But what we are on criticizing"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3174.299,"endTime":3176.939,"body":"some of some psychologists and"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3174.299,"endTime":3176.939,"body":"mental like"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3178.47,"endTime":3179.28,"body":"everyone's human."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3180.57,"endTime":3182.25,"body":"I mean, people"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3180.57,"endTime":3182.25,"body":"talk about like, this is where"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3182.28,"endTime":3184.05,"body":"it gets where you can't really"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3182.28,"endTime":3184.05,"body":"talk about mental health without"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3184.05,"endTime":3187.11,"body":"talking about the hierarchy of"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3184.05,"endTime":3187.11,"body":"needs. And that was come up with"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3187.26,"endTime":3191.25,"body":"Maslow and the bottom and then"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3187.26,"endTime":3191.25,"body":"as you go up the pyramid, Maslow"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3191.25,"endTime":3196.02,"body":"married his cousin. So let's,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3191.25,"endTime":3196.02,"body":"let's just back off taking too"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3196.02,"endTime":3200.19,"body":"much advice of a man who's"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3196.02,"endTime":3200.19,"body":"probably got seven fingers and"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3200.19,"endTime":3201.03,"body":"toes, you know."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3201.69,"endTime":3205.77,"body":"So we know how he"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3201.69,"endTime":3205.77,"body":"sped up that route to self"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3205.77,"endTime":3209.04,"body":"actualization by married his"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3205.77,"endTime":3209.04,"body":"cousin, I'll have to look that"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3209.04,"endTime":3209.34,"body":"up."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3209.64,"endTime":3211.95,"body":"This is unlike"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3209.64,"endTime":3211.95,"body":"Well, yeah, and you talk about"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3211.95,"endTime":3214.65,"body":"self actualization like a"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3211.95,"endTime":3214.65,"body":"youngin idea, like Jung and"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3214.65,"endTime":3216.72,"body":"Freud, were really we have"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3214.65,"endTime":3216.72,"body":"friends and I mean,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3216.72,"endTime":3218.58,"body":"subsequently, there's a"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3216.72,"endTime":3218.58,"body":"brilliant story that when they"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3218.58,"endTime":3222.81,"body":"first met in Vienna, they"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3218.58,"endTime":3222.81,"body":"chatted for 13 hours non stop."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3223.02,"endTime":3227.52,"body":"What a fucking nightmare. I"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3223.02,"endTime":3227.52,"body":"can't I've never had a"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3227.52,"endTime":3231.18,"body":"conversation that's gone on"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3227.52,"endTime":3231.18,"body":"longer than an actual day like I"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3231.18,"endTime":3235.05,"body":"caught. They must have been a"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3231.18,"endTime":3235.05,"body":"no. And then had this massive,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3235.26,"endTime":3240.9,"body":"this huge catastrophic, falling"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3235.26,"endTime":3240.9,"body":"out. I know, it's just like, it"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3240.9,"endTime":3243.3,"body":"just mental but brilliant is and"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3244.14,"endTime":3247.47,"body":"that's funny."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3244.14,"endTime":3247.47,"body":"Well, we didn't have texty back"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3247.47,"endTime":3249.12,"body":"then. So maybe they just had to"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3247.47,"endTime":3249.12,"body":"get it out."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":3250.98,"endTime":3251.58,"body":"Yeah, no."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3253.98,"endTime":3258.09,"body":"I'm what inspired"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3253.98,"endTime":3258.09,"body":"you to like, present all this"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3258.09,"endTime":3260.73,"body":"through stand up comedy Did you"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3258.09,"endTime":3260.73,"body":"always want to perform?"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3261.36,"endTime":3263.55,"body":"I think I've"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3261.36,"endTime":3263.55,"body":"always loved comedy, and I"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3263.55,"endTime":3269.91,"body":"started loving comedy when I"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3263.55,"endTime":3269.91,"body":"went away to we call university"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3269.91,"endTime":3274.62,"body":"so great. Yes, that's cool. It's"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3269.91,"endTime":3274.62,"body":"college. I think college they"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3274.62,"endTime":3278.73,"body":"go. There was this little comedy"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3274.62,"endTime":3278.73,"body":"club. And I used to go every two"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3278.73,"endTime":3281.97,"body":"weeks because that's what I was"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3278.73,"endTime":3281.97,"body":"and I loved. And it was amazing."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3282.0,"endTime":3285.0,"body":"And I started bringing more and"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3282.0,"endTime":3285.0,"body":"more people and I think I love"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3285.0,"endTime":3289.2,"body":"so many things about it. One of"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3285.0,"endTime":3289.2,"body":"it was the community aspect. I"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3289.2,"endTime":3292.83,"body":"genuinely am quite an introvert."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3289.2,"endTime":3292.83,"body":"And people are that's because"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3292.83,"endTime":3298.53,"body":"yeah, you're such a loud mouth."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3292.83,"endTime":3298.53,"body":"If I was being with other"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3298.53,"endTime":3303.39,"body":"people, I would sit and listen."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3298.53,"endTime":3303.39,"body":"And I think it's so common for"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3303.39,"endTime":3306.69,"body":"so many introverts that you"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3303.39,"endTime":3306.69,"body":"know, you kind of have to say"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3306.69,"endTime":3310.11,"body":"something, there's actually just"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3306.69,"endTime":3310.11,"body":"going to, you know, go into a"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3310.11,"endTime":3312.93,"body":"club or having a couple of pints"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3310.11,"endTime":3312.93,"body":"sitting with your mates in the"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3312.96,"endTime":3316.62,"body":"breaks, I was not growl I really"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3312.96,"endTime":3316.62,"body":"like that. So there was that"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3316.65,"endTime":3322.56,"body":"sort of bit. But also, I really"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3316.65,"endTime":3322.56,"body":"liked how all of the comics were"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3322.56,"endTime":3329.43,"body":"losers and freaks. And they set"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3322.56,"endTime":3329.43,"body":"up for comedy. When was the last"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3329.43,"endTime":3332.04,"body":"time you heard a comedian"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3329.43,"endTime":3332.04,"body":"talking about having too much"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3332.04,"endTime":3338.37,"body":"money, or being too successful,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3332.04,"endTime":3338.37,"body":"or having too many partners"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3338.4,"endTime":3343.8,"body":"apart from Russell Brand,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3338.4,"endTime":3343.8,"body":"they're on any kind of do that."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3343.86,"endTime":3348.15,"body":"And I love that they took really"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3343.86,"endTime":3348.15,"body":"dark things like loneliness and"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3348.45,"endTime":3352.62,"body":"being too poor, or being a free"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3348.45,"endTime":3352.62,"body":"cook, you know, commonly things"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3352.62,"endTime":3357.96,"body":"like being Campbell, gay or"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3352.62,"endTime":3357.96,"body":"trans. And celebrating and"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3357.96,"endTime":3362.85,"body":"explained it. And so I started"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3357.96,"endTime":3362.85,"body":"doing stand up when I was as I"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3362.85,"endTime":3367.71,"body":"was sort of started, when I was"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3362.85,"endTime":3367.71,"body":"about sort of 2021. And then at"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3367.71,"endTime":3374.01,"body":"24, I moved to London, and went"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3367.71,"endTime":3374.01,"body":"full time and stand up. And it"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3374.01,"endTime":3378.6,"body":"just naturally came to me to you"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3374.01,"endTime":3378.6,"body":"know, sort of comedy was my way"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3378.6,"endTime":3381.63,"body":"of sort of making sense of the"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3378.6,"endTime":3381.63,"body":"world. Because the thing I love"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3381.63,"endTime":3386.55,"body":"about humor is it can be your"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3381.63,"endTime":3386.55,"body":"foil, you can say anything, no"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3386.55,"endTime":3392.28,"body":"matter how dark, no matter how"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3386.55,"endTime":3392.28,"body":"divisive, no matter how deep, as"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3392.28,"endTime":3395.55,"body":"long as you can make someone"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3392.28,"endTime":3395.55,"body":"laugh and and you can get away"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3395.55,"endTime":3399.63,"body":"with blue murder. And I thought"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3395.55,"endTime":3399.63,"body":"that was incredible. But it can"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3399.63,"endTime":3402.63,"body":"also be used for good as well."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3399.63,"endTime":3402.63,"body":"And I think that's really"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3402.63,"endTime":3403.23,"body":"important."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3404.34,"endTime":3407.64,"body":"Yeah, I see"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3404.34,"endTime":3407.64,"body":"similar things for me pursuing"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3407.64,"endTime":3411.72,"body":"stand up, it's, it's a way for"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3407.64,"endTime":3411.72,"body":"like my introvert to talk about"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3411.72,"endTime":3415.23,"body":"myself. It's like, this is my"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3411.72,"endTime":3415.23,"body":"time to do something, I don't"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3415.23,"endTime":3416.61,"body":"want to listen all the time,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3417.3,"endTime":3420.84,"body":"completely. And"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3417.3,"endTime":3420.84,"body":"actually, Freud did, you know,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3420.84,"endTime":3424.8,"body":"sort of, there's loads of"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3420.84,"endTime":3424.8,"body":"different theories of human and"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3424.83,"endTime":3427.35,"body":"Freud was one of the proponents"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3424.83,"endTime":3427.35,"body":"of the what they call the"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3427.35,"endTime":3430.68,"body":"incongruity theory, and he"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3427.35,"endTime":3430.68,"body":"reckons that the only reason"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3430.68,"endTime":3433.86,"body":"that we laugh is because in"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3430.68,"endTime":3433.86,"body":"Congress now, so you put"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3433.86,"endTime":3438.21,"body":"something in a different context"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3433.86,"endTime":3438.21,"body":"or a different place, which is,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3438.21,"endTime":3442.26,"body":"you know, very sort of nice. It"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3438.21,"endTime":3442.26,"body":"is not the only theory out"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3442.26,"endTime":3446.7,"body":"there, you've got the like the"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3442.26,"endTime":3446.7,"body":"release theory of humor, which"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3446.7,"endTime":3450.24,"body":"is about shopping out in loads"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3446.7,"endTime":3450.24,"body":"with the basically like, humor,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3450.24,"endTime":3453.39,"body":"laughing is just like bursting a"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3450.24,"endTime":3453.39,"body":"balloon. Oh, thank God, we're"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3453.39,"endTime":3458.76,"body":"talking about something else."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3453.39,"endTime":3458.76,"body":"Those are different. And I find"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3458.76,"endTime":3462.09,"body":"that sort of element of it."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3458.76,"endTime":3462.09,"body":"Really interesting as well. But"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3462.09,"endTime":3466.44,"body":"yeah, I completely agree that I"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3462.09,"endTime":3466.44,"body":"think that comedy is a communal"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3466.44,"endTime":3471.03,"body":"thing is beautiful. And also is"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3466.44,"endTime":3471.03,"body":"one of those community things. I"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3471.03,"endTime":3475.14,"body":"genuinely say that one of my"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3471.03,"endTime":3475.14,"body":"favorite things that life, I"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3475.14,"endTime":3479.07,"body":"know that I'm comfortable with"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3475.14,"endTime":3479.07,"body":"someone when I'm in the car, and"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3479.07,"endTime":3483.66,"body":"we stop chatting, and it ain't"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3479.07,"endTime":3483.66,"body":"awkward. I love that. I love a"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3483.66,"endTime":3488.94,"body":"non awkward set. And just Yeah,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3483.66,"endTime":3488.94,"body":"the window. And to me, that's"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3488.94,"endTime":3492.54,"body":"what, that's what being in a"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3488.94,"endTime":3492.54,"body":"comedy club is surrounded by"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3492.54,"endTime":3496.56,"body":"people. But you know what you"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3492.54,"endTime":3496.56,"body":"told off if you chat, be quiet."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3496.77,"endTime":3498.36,"body":"Enjoy our life."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3499.08,"endTime":3501.66,"body":"Yeah, trust that"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3499.08,"endTime":3501.66,"body":"whoever's getting the stage time"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3501.66,"endTime":3504.21,"body":"is is worth the quiet the"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3501.66,"endTime":3504.21,"body":"attention."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3504.54,"endTime":3505.41,"body":"Definitely."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3506.37,"endTime":3509.43,"body":"That's so nice."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3506.37,"endTime":3509.43,"body":"And then I think humor is a"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3509.43,"endTime":3513.99,"body":"great way to bring up mental"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3509.43,"endTime":3513.99,"body":"health conversation to bring up"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3513.99,"endTime":3517.62,"body":"anorexia, I feel like in your"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3513.99,"endTime":3517.62,"body":"TED Talk, it's very funny. And"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3517.62,"endTime":3520.47,"body":"you do you do a good job of"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3517.62,"endTime":3520.47,"body":"like, here's something about my"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3520.47,"endTime":3523.86,"body":"eating disorder. Here's a joke,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3520.47,"endTime":3523.86,"body":"and you break the tension pretty"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3523.89,"endTime":3525.0,"body":"often, which is great."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3526.29,"endTime":3529.44,"body":"Thank you. That's"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3526.29,"endTime":3529.44,"body":"really kind. I mean, yeah, it's"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3529.44,"endTime":3532.65,"body":"all sort of smoke and mirrors."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3529.44,"endTime":3532.65,"body":"And I've got admit, when I first"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3532.65,"endTime":3538.29,"body":"worked shy about anorexia, I"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3532.65,"endTime":3538.29,"body":"found it really difficult to"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3538.29,"endTime":3543.6,"body":"either. I mean, I was gonna say,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3538.29,"endTime":3543.6,"body":"keep the gag count. And that's"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3543.6,"endTime":3547.32,"body":"not a that's not appropriate."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3543.6,"endTime":3547.32,"body":"But keep the sort of jokes"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3547.41,"endTime":3549.24,"body":"ticking along, get"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3549.24,"endTime":3550.62,"body":"enough laughs per"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3549.24,"endTime":3550.62,"body":"minute."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3551.22,"endTime":3556.02,"body":"But without the"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3551.22,"endTime":3556.02,"body":"detriment of palming of truth."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3556.2,"endTime":3560.43,"body":"So yeah, it was difficult to do"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3556.2,"endTime":3560.43,"body":"that. And it's weird, you know,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3560.43,"endTime":3564.0,"body":"to sort of find that balance,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3560.43,"endTime":3564.0,"body":"especially, sometimes one of the"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3564.0,"endTime":3566.01,"body":"things that I found about"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3564.0,"endTime":3566.01,"body":"talking about things, like"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3566.04,"endTime":3568.47,"body":"eating disorders is sometimes"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3566.04,"endTime":3568.47,"body":"people can come to you with real"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3568.47,"endTime":3572.49,"body":"aggression, because you think"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3568.47,"endTime":3572.49,"body":"that you're going to be mocking,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3572.49,"endTime":3575.19,"body":"but my kind of aspect is, you"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3572.49,"endTime":3575.19,"body":"know, humor should be used to"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3575.19,"endTime":3578.28,"body":"belittle or demean anyone, it"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3575.19,"endTime":3578.28,"body":"should actually be used to sort"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3578.28,"endTime":3580.11,"body":"of celebrate everyone."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3580.92,"endTime":3582.93,"body":"Yeah, maybe, you"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3580.92,"endTime":3582.93,"body":"know, to make it more"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3582.93,"endTime":3585.66,"body":"educational, or just make it"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3582.93,"endTime":3585.66,"body":"more normalized."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3586.079,"endTime":3590.459,"body":"As your BBC thing."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3586.079,"endTime":3590.459,"body":"Entertain, educate, and engage."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3592.289,"endTime":3594.479,"body":"Work To be honest, but there we"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3592.289,"endTime":3594.479,"body":"go."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3595.14,"endTime":3597.99,"body":"That's funny. I"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3595.14,"endTime":3597.99,"body":"want to spin a roulette wheel"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3597.99,"endTime":3599.97,"body":"give you a random question to go"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3597.99,"endTime":3599.97,"body":"out."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3600.0,"endTime":3602.64,"body":"I love I love"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3600.0,"endTime":3602.64,"body":"this."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3603.39,"endTime":3605.13,"body":"Make it a game"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3603.39,"endTime":3605.13,"body":"show. Right? I'll give you a"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3605.13,"endTime":3606.99,"body":"spin and I'll tell you where it"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3605.13,"endTime":3606.99,"body":"lands."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3612.269,"endTime":3615.629,"body":"What's your favorite TV show?"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3612.269,"endTime":3615.629,"body":"either now or something you love"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3615.629,"endTime":3616.469,"body":"to rewatch?"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3617.189,"endTime":3623.159,"body":"Oh my goodness TV."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3617.189,"endTime":3623.159,"body":"This is a really, really tricky"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3623.159,"endTime":3630.629,"body":"one for me. I'm I'm gonna go"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3623.159,"endTime":3630.629,"body":"out. And you know what? My"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3630.629,"endTime":3636.179,"body":"favorite one isn't even the one"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3630.629,"endTime":3636.179,"body":"that I've watched that much. But"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3636.419,"endTime":3642.629,"body":"I just love it. And it's"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3636.419,"endTime":3642.629,"body":"Frasier, I just Frasier. So it's"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3642.629,"endTime":3648.329,"body":"like a warm hug. Over there. It"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3642.629,"endTime":3648.329,"body":"was always played about 10 1030."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3648.329,"endTime":3650.639,"body":"In the daytime, you'd only watch"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3648.329,"endTime":3650.639,"body":"it if you're on holiday. And"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3650.639,"endTime":3653.279,"body":"he's always on and they're"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3650.639,"endTime":3653.279,"body":"bringing in a new series. And"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3653.279,"endTime":3657.569,"body":"I'm not even like a huge Frazier"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3653.279,"endTime":3657.569,"body":"fan. But I'd say, as a TV series"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3657.569,"endTime":3662.789,"body":"as a feeling as of being a part"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3657.569,"endTime":3662.789,"body":"of something and brilliant. I"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3662.789,"endTime":3665.699,"body":"think it ticks all the boxes of"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3662.789,"endTime":3665.699,"body":"what a TV show should be. It"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3665.699,"endTime":3668.219,"body":"doesn't. It doesn't stop you"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3665.699,"endTime":3668.219,"body":"talking doesn't stop. You can"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3668.219,"endTime":3671.489,"body":"watch it in the background. So"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3668.219,"endTime":3671.489,"body":"right. I just think it's perfect"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3671.489,"endTime":3672.659,"body":"as a TV show."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3673.53,"endTime":3676.32,"body":"That's awesome. I"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3673.53,"endTime":3676.32,"body":"I've never actually seen much of"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3676.32,"endTime":3679.68,"body":"Frasier. I think I've only seen"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3676.32,"endTime":3679.68,"body":"it in the background. Because I"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3679.68,"endTime":3682.89,"body":"think I was like, I was in two"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3679.68,"endTime":3682.89,"body":"friends at the time. They're"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3682.89,"endTime":3685.26,"body":"both airy around the same time."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3682.89,"endTime":3685.26,"body":"So I didn't have time for"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3685.26,"endTime":3689.34,"body":"Frasier. But I've heard a lot"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3685.26,"endTime":3689.34,"body":"about it, and it does bring up"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3689.34,"endTime":3690.0,"body":"therapy."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3690.63,"endTime":3693.45,"body":"dog does and it"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3690.63,"endTime":3693.45,"body":"used that so brilliantly, and"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3693.45,"endTime":3697.02,"body":"also shows as well that they're"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3693.45,"endTime":3697.02,"body":"both flawed, ridiculous"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3697.02,"endTime":3700.38,"body":"characters. I mean, I was"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3697.02,"endTime":3700.38,"body":"thinking of friends as well, but"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3700.56,"endTime":3704.73,"body":"I feel like in 2020 when he has"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3700.56,"endTime":3704.73,"body":"an age well, you know, there's"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3704.73,"endTime":3708.09,"body":"like quite a lot of friends that"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3704.73,"endTime":3708.09,"body":"you know, it's a"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3708.96,"endTime":3711.9,"body":"Yeah, it's so I"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3708.96,"endTime":3711.9,"body":"know that I I've seen all the"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3711.9,"endTime":3715.2,"body":"friends so I know it but I feel"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3711.9,"endTime":3715.2,"body":"like it's funny but it didn't"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3715.23,"endTime":3718.59,"body":"stick is like a show I want to"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3715.23,"endTime":3718.59,"body":"remember forever. It's not like"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3718.59,"endTime":3719.43,"body":"my favorite show."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3720.3,"endTime":3723.84,"body":"It's not I could"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3720.3,"endTime":3723.84,"body":"have asked me what film BAM"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3723.84,"endTime":3727.44,"body":"without a doubt Mrs. Doubtfire."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3723.84,"endTime":3727.44,"body":"That is unequivocally the best"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3727.44,"endTime":3730.92,"body":"film. I mean, they scientists"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3727.44,"endTime":3730.92,"body":"are gonna dig it up and go. What"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3730.92,"endTime":3731.73,"body":"were they What?"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3732.81,"endTime":3735.09,"body":"cinema has been so"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3732.81,"endTime":3735.09,"body":"you think Mrs. Doubtfire holds"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3735.09,"endTime":3735.45,"body":"up,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3735.51,"endTime":3738.69,"body":"Bob? Well, yeah, I"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3735.51,"endTime":3738.69,"body":"mean, people have pointed eyes a"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3738.69,"endTime":3743.22,"body":"little bit transphobic and blah,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3738.69,"endTime":3743.22,"body":"blah, blah. But I just think as"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3743.28,"endTime":3746.43,"body":"I love it for so many reasons"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3743.28,"endTime":3746.43,"body":"that are so different podcast,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3746.43,"endTime":3750.39,"body":"but one of the things that I do"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3746.43,"endTime":3750.39,"body":"genuinely love about it is the"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3750.39,"endTime":3755.82,"body":"ending. It's not a happy ending."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3750.39,"endTime":3755.82,"body":"But it's a real world. Michael"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3756.12,"endTime":3760.08,"body":"Miranda, don't get back to it."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3756.12,"endTime":3760.08,"body":"Sorry, Daniel and Miranda, the"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3760.08,"endTime":3762.96,"body":"two sort of people they don't"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3760.08,"endTime":3762.96,"body":"get back together spoiler alert"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3762.96,"endTime":3769.02,"body":"for anyone but they still remain"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3762.96,"endTime":3769.02,"body":"divorce. The kids don't get"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3769.11,"endTime":3773.04,"body":"everything they want Mrs."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3769.11,"endTime":3773.04,"body":"Doubtfire is Daniel's character,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3773.16,"endTime":3776.97,"body":"seemingly doesn't get everything"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3773.16,"endTime":3776.97,"body":"that she wants. But you know"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3776.97,"endTime":3782.22,"body":"what? It's okay. And it's still"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3776.97,"endTime":3782.22,"body":"happy in spite of that. And I"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3782.22,"endTime":3783.51,"body":"just think that's brilliant."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3784.26,"endTime":3785.67,"body":"It ends"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3784.26,"endTime":3785.67,"body":"realistically."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3785.7,"endTime":3790.08,"body":"Yes. Which is so"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3785.7,"endTime":3790.08,"body":"rare of movies. Yeah,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3790.11,"endTime":3792.24,"body":"I want to rewatch"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3790.11,"endTime":3792.24,"body":"Mrs. Doubtfire. Thank you for"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3792.24,"endTime":3796.89,"body":"bringing that to my attention."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3792.24,"endTime":3796.89,"body":"My last question is tell us"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3796.89,"endTime":3797.76,"body":"about your book."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3799.17,"endTime":3804.84,"body":"Oh, wow. Don't"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3799.17,"endTime":3804.84,"body":"read it. Really? That's I? I"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3804.84,"endTime":3808.77,"body":"was, yeah, it's always asked"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3804.84,"endTime":3808.77,"body":"basically, when I done the sort"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3808.77,"endTime":3813.54,"body":"of tour, I was asked to write"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3808.77,"endTime":3813.54,"body":"this book. And I was a bit like"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3813.54,"endTime":3815.55,"body":"queasy about it, because they"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3813.54,"endTime":3815.55,"body":"kept on saying, you know, sort"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3815.55,"endTime":3817.68,"body":"of tell your story. And I was"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3815.55,"endTime":3817.68,"body":"like, Oh, I don't I don't want"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3817.68,"endTime":3822.15,"body":"to be, like famous and they can"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3817.68,"endTime":3822.15,"body":"say and I started this, this"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3822.15,"endTime":3825.21,"body":"feels very much like, this is my"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3822.15,"endTime":3825.21,"body":"life and stuff. And I was like,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3825.21,"endTime":3828.69,"body":"Oh, I don't like that. But so"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3825.21,"endTime":3828.69,"body":"the mantra for the book was"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3828.69,"endTime":3830.97,"body":"write the book that I needed"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3828.69,"endTime":3830.97,"body":"when I was 17. And when I was"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3830.97,"endTime":3835.8,"body":"17, I needed two things. I"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3830.97,"endTime":3835.8,"body":"needed actual tangible coping"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3836.28,"endTime":3840.39,"body":"mechanisms. And I needed people"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3836.28,"endTime":3840.39,"body":"to treat me like a person not a"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3840.39,"endTime":3843.3,"body":"patient as soon as people find"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3840.39,"endTime":3843.3,"body":"out that I've got mental illness"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3843.3,"endTime":3846.45,"body":"they stopped playing pranks they"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3843.3,"endTime":3846.45,"body":"stopped laughing and joking with"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3846.45,"endTime":3849.93,"body":"me so they want to say the wrong"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3846.45,"endTime":3849.93,"body":"thing."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3850.23,"endTime":3851.79,"body":"Sarah can on"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3850.23,"endTime":3851.79,"body":"eggshells"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3851.94,"endTime":3854.7,"body":"couldn't agree"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3851.94,"endTime":3854.7,"body":"more. Which is why originally I"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3854.7,"endTime":3856.98,"body":"wanted to call the book cuz it"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3854.7,"endTime":3856.98,"body":"was about anorexia. I wanted to"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3856.98,"endTime":3859.95,"body":"sort of engage comedy I wanted"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3856.98,"endTime":3859.95,"body":"to call it originally the real"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3859.95,"endTime":3860.76,"body":"Hunger Games."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":3862.92,"endTime":3864.27,"body":"That sounds problematic"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3865.5,"endTime":3868.32,"body":"but apparently we"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3865.5,"endTime":3868.32,"body":"weren't allowed to for copyright"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3868.32,"endTime":3871.47,"body":"reasons like so was like picking"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3868.32,"endTime":3871.47,"body":"it like pick it up or get some"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3871.47,"endTime":3874.8,"body":"sort of you know, despotic look"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3871.47,"endTime":3874.8,"body":"at the future guy. This guy's"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3874.8,"endTime":3876.84,"body":"talking about weight and"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3874.8,"endTime":3876.84,"body":"calories quite a lot get"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":3876.84,"endTime":3878.94,"body":"on with the killing."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":3876.84,"endTime":3878.94,"body":"Yeah,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3879.09,"endTime":3880.98,"body":"Susanna Collins"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3879.09,"endTime":3880.98,"body":"did not write this"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":3882.78,"endTime":3883.47,"body":"problem."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3884.07,"endTime":3887.19,"body":"Right knowledge by"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3884.07,"endTime":3887.19,"body":"the way as well. That is amazing"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3887.19,"endTime":3892.41,"body":"knowledge will add up. It's"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3887.19,"endTime":3892.41,"body":"basically I use a theoretical I"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3892.41,"endTime":3897.3,"body":"use a psychological model called"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3892.41,"endTime":3897.3,"body":"the transtheoretical code"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3897.72,"endTime":3901.38,"body":"transtheoretical model. Sorry."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3897.72,"endTime":3901.38,"body":"which basically says Chen"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3901.44,"endTime":3904.47,"body":"changed an app and in one step,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3901.44,"endTime":3904.47,"body":"it's not like oh, I need to"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3904.47,"endTime":3908.58,"body":"change that. Bam, it's done."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3904.47,"endTime":3908.58,"body":"There were six stages to change."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3908.61,"endTime":3911.97,"body":"And the book is structured"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3908.61,"endTime":3911.97,"body":"around that model so that"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3911.97,"endTime":3915.15,"body":"hopefully you can pick it up."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3911.97,"endTime":3915.15,"body":"And no matter where you are, in"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3915.15,"endTime":3918.78,"body":"the eating disorder cycle,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3915.15,"endTime":3918.78,"body":"whether you're pre contemplation"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3918.78,"endTime":3922.05,"body":"like I was, I don't even realize"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3918.78,"endTime":3922.05,"body":"that I'm a problem, all the way"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3922.05,"endTime":3927.18,"body":"through to sort of relapse. And"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3922.05,"endTime":3927.18,"body":"so it's all of that wound"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3927.18,"endTime":3931.89,"body":"together and sort of really"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3927.18,"endTime":3931.89,"body":"wrapped up in big joke."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3933.54,"endTime":3936.06,"body":"As long as there's"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3933.54,"endTime":3936.06,"body":"jokes throughout, then I'm on"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3936.06,"endTime":3936.45,"body":"board."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3937.2,"endTime":3938.76,"body":"Actually,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3937.2,"endTime":3938.76,"body":"ironically, one of the things"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3938.76,"endTime":3943.08,"body":"about my recovery was I had to I"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3938.76,"endTime":3943.08,"body":"found out that I needed a"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3943.08,"endTime":3948.63,"body":"circumcision. So that was, yeah,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3943.08,"endTime":3948.63,"body":"I didn't realize the sex was was"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3948.63,"endTime":3951.51,"body":"really, really painful for me."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3948.63,"endTime":3951.51,"body":"So I had to have a circumcision."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3951.51,"endTime":3954.36,"body":"And then I did a show about"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3951.51,"endTime":3954.36,"body":"that, which I originally wanted"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3954.36,"endTime":3959.28,"body":"to call from the hood. But they"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3954.36,"endTime":3959.28,"body":"they wouldn't let me so call it"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3959.28,"endTime":3964.83,"body":"circumcision. But yeah, that was"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3959.28,"endTime":3964.83,"body":"the ironically is one big joke"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3964.83,"endTime":3965.43,"body":"and Lj,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3966.36,"endTime":3969.03,"body":"what kind of"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3966.36,"endTime":3969.03,"body":"hopefully that helped you coming"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3969.03,"endTime":3971.73,"body":"to that realization? Like, oh,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3969.03,"endTime":3971.73,"body":"maybe this is why like, my sex"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3971.73,"endTime":3973.53,"body":"drive was so abysmal."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3974.13,"endTime":3977.04,"body":"Yeah, that's a"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3974.13,"endTime":3977.04,"body":"really interesting thing."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3977.07,"endTime":3979.65,"body":"Because like, yeah, it was it"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3977.07,"endTime":3979.65,"body":"was incredibly painful for me."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3979.65,"endTime":3983.31,"body":"And also, I used to pass out"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3979.65,"endTime":3983.31,"body":"quite like genuinely once passed"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3983.31,"endTime":3987.15,"body":"that and the act of coitus."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3983.31,"endTime":3987.15,"body":"Which is that never a good look"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3987.51,"endTime":3987.99,"body":"for"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3988.019,"endTime":3989.729,"body":"but that sounds"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3988.019,"endTime":3989.729,"body":"like a funny story."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":3990.69,"endTime":3991.77,"body":"Thank you. Yeah."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3992.67,"endTime":3996.87,"body":"I mean, I it was"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3992.67,"endTime":3996.87,"body":"funny, my poor partner, for the"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3996.87,"endTime":4004.16,"body":"partner, and also kind of"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":3996.87,"endTime":4004.16,"body":"renders. But yeah, he kind of"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":4004.16,"endTime":4008.42,"body":"like basically had this thing,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":4004.16,"endTime":4008.42,"body":"where without sharing too much,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":4008.51,"endTime":4013.61,"body":"the neck on my jumper was a"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":4008.51,"endTime":4013.61,"body":"little bit too tight. And so it"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":4013.61,"endTime":4016.1,"body":"just popped through and like a"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":4013.61,"endTime":4016.1,"body":"sad snake it was it was an"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":4016.1,"endTime":4021.14,"body":"honorable thing. But now I sort"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":4016.1,"endTime":4021.14,"body":"of view sex in a very weird, a"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":4021.14,"endTime":4025.19,"body":"very different way of like, it's"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":4021.14,"endTime":4025.19,"body":"nice. And you know, it's all"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":4025.19,"endTime":4027.92,"body":"lovely, but we're all either"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":4025.19,"endTime":4027.92,"body":"laugh, let's not be mental about"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":4027.92,"endTime":4031.13,"body":"it. I don't understand why"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":4027.92,"endTime":4031.13,"body":"people would lie to their"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":4031.13,"endTime":4034.76,"body":"partners would rip their"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":4031.13,"endTime":4034.76,"body":"families apart just to do a"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":4034.76,"endTime":4036.17,"body":"little bit of hokey pokey."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":4038.03,"endTime":4039.89,"body":"It shouldn't be a"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":4038.03,"endTime":4039.89,"body":"life or death type thing. I"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":4039.89,"endTime":4043.4,"body":"mean, people talk about like,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":4039.89,"endTime":4043.4,"body":"losing their virginity or coming"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":4043.4,"endTime":4047.21,"body":"out of a celibacy phase. And I"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":4043.4,"endTime":4047.21,"body":"feel like the answer is always"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":4047.21,"endTime":4050.3,"body":"like, just keep waiting. Like"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":4047.21,"endTime":4050.3,"body":"you're not run into anything"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":4050.3,"endTime":4050.69,"body":"great."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":4052.37,"endTime":4055.52,"body":"Like my first"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":4052.37,"endTime":4055.52,"body":"sexual trouble. Oh, god, that"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":4055.52,"endTime":4059.0,"body":"was terrible for everyone"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":4055.52,"endTime":4059.0,"body":"involved. Only me, you know, is"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":4059.0,"endTime":4062.99,"body":"that a you know? Yeah, it's"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":4059.0,"endTime":4062.99,"body":"weird. And it's kind of"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":4063.29,"endTime":4070.76,"body":"pervasive cloud that hangs over"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":4063.29,"endTime":4070.76,"body":"as of sexuality, of, of sex of"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":4071.0,"endTime":4075.38,"body":"arousal. And then they again to"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":4071.0,"endTime":4075.38,"body":"come back to this this Freudian"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":4075.38,"endTime":4079.25,"body":"thing of like, Freud was like,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":4075.38,"endTime":4079.25,"body":"it's actually more the chase"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":4079.25,"endTime":4082.46,"body":"rather than the gang and I think"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":4079.25,"endTime":4082.46,"body":"feel that we've got a kind of"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":4082.49,"endTime":4085.43,"body":"prick that nerves to the chase"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":4082.49,"endTime":4085.43,"body":"and sort of make you really"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":4085.43,"endTime":4087.86,"body":"stuck. It's not gonna be on the"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":4085.43,"endTime":4087.86,"body":"end or?"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":4088.61,"endTime":4091.01,"body":"Yeah, a lot of"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":4088.61,"endTime":4091.01,"body":"it's that mental built up."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":4091.07,"endTime":4092.45,"body":"Yes. Big time."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":4093.29,"endTime":4095.63,"body":"That's so true."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":4093.29,"endTime":4095.63,"body":"But I think your point is, is"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":4095.63,"endTime":4099.95,"body":"good. Sex is lovely. It is nice."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":4095.63,"endTime":4099.95,"body":"But it's not the be all end all."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":4099.95,"endTime":4101.99,"body":"You know, it's, it's another"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":4099.95,"endTime":4101.99,"body":"part of life."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":4102.349,"endTime":4104.239,"body":"Well, I always"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":4102.349,"endTime":4104.239,"body":"used to make a joke that it's"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":4104.239,"endTime":4106.729,"body":"you know, it's all right. But"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":4104.239,"endTime":4106.729,"body":"it's kind of like taking the"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":4106.729,"endTime":4109.669,"body":"bins out cuz you you know,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":4106.729,"endTime":4109.669,"body":"you've if you're in a"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":4109.669,"endTime":4115.189,"body":"relationship, you do it once a"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":4109.669,"endTime":4115.189,"body":"week. And then everyone's happy."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":4115.339,"endTime":4116.179,"body":"So yeah."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":4117.41,"endTime":4119.57,"body":"Taking the benz"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":4117.41,"endTime":4119.57,"body":"out, like the car?"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":4119.75,"endTime":4122.96,"body":"no, sorry, the"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":4119.75,"endTime":4122.96,"body":"bins like empty bins."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":4123.14,"endTime":4124.07,"body":"So you might"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":4124.1,"endTime":4126.23,"body":"take in the"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":4124.1,"endTime":4126.23,"body":"Mercedes Benz for a drive."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":4128.42,"endTime":4131.93,"body":"I would love to be"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":4128.42,"endTime":4131.93,"body":"on Benz type salary. I mean,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":4131.93,"endTime":4132.5,"body":"Jesus"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":4134.059,"endTime":4134.749,"body":"moments."},{"speaker":"Theme Song","startTime":4136.07,"endTime":4138.65,"body":"That's funny. So"},{"speaker":"Theme Song","startTime":4136.07,"endTime":4138.65,"body":"it's like taking out the trash."},{"speaker":"Theme Song","startTime":4139.61,"endTime":4139.82,"body":"guy"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":4139.82,"endTime":4141.89,"body":"you thought since"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":4139.82,"endTime":4141.89,"body":"I should have said that taking"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":4141.89,"endTime":4143.24,"body":"out the trash Friday."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":4143.81,"endTime":4147.59,"body":"I hope you know"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":4143.81,"endTime":4147.59,"body":"that's a that's a low estimate"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":4147.59,"endTime":4150.74,"body":"analogy. And we'll sell some"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":4147.59,"endTime":4150.74,"body":"more of your books. You know,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":4151.1,"endTime":4153.92,"body":"maybe you go back on tour once"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":4151.1,"endTime":4153.92,"body":"the pandemic ends, and then"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":4154.64,"endTime":4156.62,"body":"you'll get that first 80s bands"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":4157.37,"endTime":4158.09,"body":"be great."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":4159.2,"endTime":4161.33,"body":"That's so funny."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":4159.2,"endTime":4161.33,"body":"Well, Dave, thank you so much"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":4161.33,"endTime":4164.87,"body":"for talking to me. Tell us where"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":4161.33,"endTime":4164.87,"body":"to find you and where people can"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":4164.87,"endTime":4165.47,"body":"follow you."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":4165.8,"endTime":4169.46,"body":"Bless you. If any"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":4165.8,"endTime":4169.46,"body":"of this has made. You want to"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":4169.46,"endTime":4172.61,"body":"follow me, I think take a long"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":4169.46,"endTime":4172.61,"body":"hard look at yourself in the"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":4172.61,"endTime":4176.54,"body":"mirror and ask why. But I my"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":4172.61,"endTime":4176.54,"body":"website is Dave Chawner dot co"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":4176.54,"endTime":4180.17,"body":"dot UK I'm on Twitter at Dave"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":4176.54,"endTime":4180.17,"body":"Chawner so that's c-h-a-w-n-e-r."},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":4181.37,"endTime":4185.15,"body":"And there's also new excitingly,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":4181.37,"endTime":4185.15,"body":"comedy for coping dot com if you"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":4185.15,"endTime":4187.19,"body":"want to have a little look at"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":4185.15,"endTime":4187.19,"body":"that. But thank you very much,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":4187.19,"endTime":4190.67,"body":"Michele. Thank you so much. I"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":4187.19,"endTime":4190.67,"body":"hope to talk soon. Yeah,"},{"speaker":"Dave Chawner","startTime":4190.7,"endTime":4191.15,"body":"definitely."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":4192.17,"endTime":4194.06,"body":"This has been"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":4192.17,"endTime":4194.06,"body":"Therapy Roulette: consent to"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":4194.06,"endTime":4197.63,"body":"vent!. If you enjoyed this"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":4194.06,"endTime":4197.63,"body":"episode a few very quick things"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":4197.63,"endTime":4200.33,"body":"you could do to help the podcast"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":4197.63,"endTime":4200.33,"body":"are leaving a review"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":4200.33,"endTime":4204.44,"body":"Review, you can leave me a"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":4200.33,"endTime":4204.44,"body":"review on rate this podcast.com"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":4204.5,"endTime":4208.43,"body":"slash therapy, or you can leave"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":4204.5,"endTime":4208.43,"body":"a review. Wherever you listen to"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":4208.43,"endTime":4212.03,"body":"podcasts. It only takes a couple"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":4208.43,"endTime":4212.03,"body":"seconds to do and it really"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":4212.03,"endTime":4216.02,"body":"helps spread the word. tell a"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":4212.03,"endTime":4216.02,"body":"friend about the podcast, anyone"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":4216.02,"endTime":4219.29,"body":"who's into mental health or"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":4216.02,"endTime":4219.29,"body":"comedy, or who needs to, like,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":4219.41,"endTime":4222.08,"body":"hear about mental health and"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":4219.41,"endTime":4222.08,"body":"comedy. If you think they'd like"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":4222.08,"endTime":4226.19,"body":"the podcast, tell them text them"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":4222.08,"endTime":4226.19,"body":"share the link. It really helps."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":4226.19,"endTime":4230.42,"body":"It's just tell people about the"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":4226.19,"endTime":4230.42,"body":"podcast. Also, while you're"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":4230.42,"endTime":4233.36,"body":"listening, if you take a"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":4230.42,"endTime":4233.36,"body":"screenshot of this episode, and"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":4233.36,"endTime":4237.26,"body":"share it on social media and tag"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":4233.36,"endTime":4237.26,"body":"me, I'll be sure to reshare and"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":4237.26,"endTime":4241.28,"body":"that also builds momentum. So on"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":4237.26,"endTime":4241.28,"body":"Instagram, I'm at Therapy"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":4241.28,"endTime":4245.6,"body":"Roulette pod. On Twitter. I'm at"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":4241.28,"endTime":4245.6,"body":"Therapy Roulette. Thank you so"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":4245.6,"endTime":4248.75,"body":"much for listening. I'll be back"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":4245.6,"endTime":4248.75,"body":"with a new episode next"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":4248.75,"endTime":4249.35,"body":"Thursday."},{"speaker":"Theme Song: Therapy Roulette","startTime":4252.65,"endTime":4256.76,"body":"Consent to Vent / Trauma"},{"speaker":"Theme Song: Therapy Roulette","startTime":4256.76,"endTime":4262.76,"body":"disguised as comedy / Therapy"},{"speaker":"Theme Song: Therapy Roulette","startTime":4256.76,"endTime":4262.76,"body":"Roulette: Consent to Vent / If"},{"speaker":"Theme Song: Therapy Roulette","startTime":4262.76,"endTime":4266.48,"body":"you dont have problems, then"},{"speaker":"Theme Song: Therapy Roulette","startTime":4262.76,"endTime":4266.48,"body":"youre likely repressing sh*t"},{"speaker":"Theme Song: Therapy Roulette","startTime":4266.54,"endTime":4269.84,"body":"and you should find a therapist"},{"speaker":"Theme Song: Therapy Roulette","startTime":4266.54,"endTime":4269.84,"body":"/ (Whos not me)"}]}