{"version":"1.0.0","segments":[{"speaker":"Theme Song","startTime":5.49,"endTime":8.55,"body":"Therapy Roulette"},{"speaker":"Theme Song","startTime":5.49,"endTime":8.55,"body":"Consent to Vent / Trauma"},{"speaker":"Theme Song","startTime":8.55,"endTime":12.99,"body":"disguised as comedy / Therapy"},{"speaker":"Theme Song","startTime":8.55,"endTime":12.99,"body":"Roulette: Consent to Vent / If"},{"speaker":"Theme Song","startTime":12.99,"endTime":15.48,"body":"you dont have problems, then"},{"speaker":"Theme Song","startTime":12.99,"endTime":15.48,"body":"youre likely repressing sh*t"},{"speaker":"Theme Song","startTime":15.48,"endTime":20.28,"body":"and you should find a therapist"},{"speaker":"Theme Song","startTime":15.48,"endTime":20.28,"body":"/ (Whos not me)"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":20.31,"endTime":22.83,"body":"Hey, welcome back"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":20.31,"endTime":22.83,"body":"to Therapy Roulette, where I"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":22.83,"endTime":28.02,"body":"give you consent to vent. My"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":22.83,"endTime":28.02,"body":"name is Michele Baci, and a"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":28.02,"endTime":32.49,"body":"little tidbit from my life"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":28.02,"endTime":32.49,"body":"recently, I actually went to a"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":32.49,"endTime":40.05,"body":"huge stand up show huge. Out"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":32.49,"endTime":40.05,"body":"here in LA, I saw one of the"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":40.05,"endTime":44.79,"body":"biggest people right now Joe"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":40.05,"endTime":44.79,"body":"Rogan, per my boyfriend's"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":44.79,"endTime":51.45,"body":"request. He is a big Rogan"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":44.79,"endTime":51.45,"body":"fanatic. I am, you know, I'm not"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":51.45,"endTime":54.75,"body":"a fanatic of Rogan. I've"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":51.45,"endTime":54.75,"body":"listened to a handful of his"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":54.78,"endTime":59.01,"body":"podcast episodes moreso A few"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":54.78,"endTime":59.01,"body":"years ago, haven't listened to a"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":59.01,"endTime":64.68,"body":"lot. lately. Since I've started"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":59.01,"endTime":64.68,"body":"dating my boyfriend, I hear most"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":64.68,"endTime":67.35,"body":"of the episodes just like bits"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":64.68,"endTime":67.35,"body":"and pieces because he plays them"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":67.5,"endTime":72.87,"body":"out loud, or he has them on the"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":67.5,"endTime":72.87,"body":"Alexa speakers plane. So I feel"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":72.87,"endTime":76.35,"body":"like I dip in and out of"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":72.87,"endTime":76.35,"body":"whatever Joe Rogan is doing. And"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":76.35,"endTime":80.04,"body":"then I hear about his little"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":76.35,"endTime":80.04,"body":"circle of people through the"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":80.04,"endTime":84.06,"body":"other things that my boyfriend"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":80.04,"endTime":84.06,"body":"listens to. But I do"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":84.09,"endTime":88.89,"body":"occasionally listen to the Joe"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":84.09,"endTime":88.89,"body":"Rogan experience myself. And"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":88.92,"endTime":93.03,"body":"sometimes my boyfriend will"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":88.92,"endTime":93.03,"body":"point out an episode He's like,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":93.03,"endTime":96.93,"body":"I think you should listen to"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":93.03,"endTime":96.93,"body":"this one it's from. It's usually"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":97.14,"endTime":100.53,"body":"the ones that Joseph wants me to"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":97.14,"endTime":100.53,"body":"listen to. They're usually by a"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":100.53,"endTime":104.55,"body":"scientist, a nutritionist, or a"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":100.53,"endTime":104.55,"body":"total"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":106.89,"endTime":111.15,"body":"normal quote unquote person who"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":106.89,"endTime":111.15,"body":"had like an alien experience."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":111.15,"endTime":114.72,"body":"It's totally all over the map."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":111.15,"endTime":114.72,"body":"He never really says listen to"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":114.72,"endTime":117.03,"body":"this one with a comedian. He"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":114.72,"endTime":117.03,"body":"usually says listen to this one"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":117.03,"endTime":123.63,"body":"with a total weirdo or a total"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":117.03,"endTime":123.63,"body":"intellectual scientists. Because"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":123.63,"endTime":126.0,"body":"I guess I don't really get that"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":123.63,"endTime":126.0,"body":"anywhere else, only on the Joe"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":126.0,"endTime":130.62,"body":"Rogan experience. But we went to"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":126.0,"endTime":130.62,"body":"go see him live. We went with a"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":130.62,"endTime":134.85,"body":"couple friends or friends who"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":130.62,"endTime":134.85,"body":"are a married couple. And it was"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":134.85,"endTime":138.9,"body":"just really nice to go out and"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":134.85,"endTime":138.9,"body":"do something. First of all, it"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":138.9,"endTime":146.49,"body":"was almost like nostalgic and"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":138.9,"endTime":146.49,"body":"heartbreaking that we were"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":146.49,"endTime":151.23,"body":"finally going to a show like"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":146.49,"endTime":151.23,"body":"I've been to one other big stand"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":151.23,"endTime":154.32,"body":"up show recently. I want to see"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":151.23,"endTime":154.32,"body":"Taylor Tomlinson, which is"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":154.32,"endTime":159.66,"body":"awesome. But that was that. I"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":154.32,"endTime":159.66,"body":"think it was the Irvine improv"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":159.66,"endTime":164.22,"body":"or somewhere near near us in"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":159.66,"endTime":164.22,"body":"Long Beach. And it wasn't like a"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":164.22,"endTime":168.06,"body":"huge show. It's more like medium"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":164.22,"endTime":168.06,"body":"size. This Joe Rogan shows at"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":168.06,"endTime":172.65,"body":"the forum in Los Angeles. And it"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":168.06,"endTime":172.65,"body":"was huge. Like I've seen fish"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":172.68,"endTime":176.82,"body":"play there. So you can cater to"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":172.68,"endTime":176.82,"body":"the biggest crowd imaginable."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":176.82,"endTime":180.93,"body":"I'm sure it's like the LA"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":176.82,"endTime":180.93,"body":"version of Madison Square"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":180.93,"endTime":185.07,"body":"Garden. But it was just really"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":180.93,"endTime":185.07,"body":"cool to actually go do an"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":185.07,"endTime":188.04,"body":"exciting thing, because we"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":185.07,"endTime":188.04,"body":"haven't done that and so long."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":188.88,"endTime":195.72,"body":"The show itself was good. You"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":188.88,"endTime":195.72,"body":"know, I would say it was good."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":195.75,"endTime":199.92,"body":"It's not my go to comedy style,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":195.75,"endTime":199.92,"body":"like I'm never going to relate"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":200.01,"endTime":204.69,"body":"to Joe Rogan. Michelle Bochy,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":200.01,"endTime":204.69,"body":"Joe Rogan, two different people."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":205.29,"endTime":209.64,"body":"He's a dude in his 50s. He has a"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":205.29,"endTime":209.64,"body":"totally different lifestyle,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":209.67,"endTime":213.75,"body":"totally different perspective"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":209.67,"endTime":213.75,"body":"than I do. However, I think he"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":213.75,"endTime":219.36,"body":"put on a funny show, I was"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":213.75,"endTime":219.36,"body":"entertained. I laughed a lot."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":219.51,"endTime":223.98,"body":"And I also felt safe at this"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":219.51,"endTime":223.98,"body":"giant show, because they"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":223.98,"endTime":227.7,"body":"required vaccination proof. Even"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":223.98,"endTime":227.7,"body":"though Rogen, I'm pretty sure"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":227.7,"endTime":230.73,"body":"it's not vaccinated. I don't"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":227.7,"endTime":230.73,"body":"know if they're enforcing that"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":230.73,"endTime":234.57,"body":"amongst the staff, there still"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":230.73,"endTime":234.57,"body":"doubt their enforcement among"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":234.57,"endTime":237.21,"body":"their performers, but the crowd"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":234.57,"endTime":237.21,"body":"was supposed to be vaccinated."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":237.78,"endTime":243.09,"body":"So just the fact that they were"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":237.78,"endTime":243.09,"body":"trying to enforce vaccination"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":243.12,"endTime":245.94,"body":"proof and the fact that they"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":243.12,"endTime":245.94,"body":"were trying to maintain like,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":246.27,"endTime":249.63,"body":"relatively COVID safe"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":246.27,"endTime":249.63,"body":"procedures, I felt safe the"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":249.63,"endTime":253.59,"body":"whole time, I kept my mask on"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":249.63,"endTime":253.59,"body":"for most of the show. You know,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":253.59,"endTime":256.86,"body":"I tried to get a few drinks in"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":253.59,"endTime":256.86,"body":"before the show. And then during"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":256.86,"endTime":259.74,"body":"the show, I was just like, mask"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":256.86,"endTime":259.74,"body":"on, still laughing through the"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":259.74,"endTime":263.73,"body":"mask. And I felt good, you know,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":259.74,"endTime":263.73,"body":"I can understand why people are"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":263.73,"endTime":267.81,"body":"hesitant to get back into the"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":263.73,"endTime":267.81,"body":"world. But for me, I'm trying to"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":267.84,"endTime":271.74,"body":"dip my toes back in, go out"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":267.84,"endTime":271.74,"body":"every once in a while I'll do my"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":272.07,"endTime":276.93,"body":"my old normal routine of"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":272.07,"endTime":276.93,"body":"entertainment and hanging out"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":276.93,"endTime":281.34,"body":"with friends and doing stand up"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":276.93,"endTime":281.34,"body":"myself, trying to integrate that"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":281.79,"endTime":286.83,"body":"in bits and pieces just so I can"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":281.79,"endTime":286.83,"body":"feel more like myself. And as"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":286.83,"endTime":289.62,"body":"long as I feel safe doing it. I"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":286.83,"endTime":289.62,"body":"think it's fine. I know that"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":289.62,"endTime":293.25,"body":"COVID still around and we have"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":289.62,"endTime":293.25,"body":"the Delta variant and people"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":293.25,"endTime":296.46,"body":"have breakthrough cases."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":293.25,"endTime":296.46,"body":"Obviously, none of us are safe."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":296.46,"endTime":299.82,"body":"We're all in danger. But I'm"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":296.46,"endTime":299.82,"body":"trying to get more comfortable"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":299.82,"endTime":307.65,"body":"doing I guess. Anyway, I wanted"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":299.82,"endTime":307.65,"body":"to bring this up because I never"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":307.65,"endTime":312.99,"body":"would have chosen to go see Joe"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":307.65,"endTime":312.99,"body":"Rogan live. I only went because"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":312.99,"endTime":318.21,"body":"Joseph, my boyfriend is a huge"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":312.99,"endTime":318.21,"body":"fan. And I'm, I was like a"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":318.21,"endTime":320.7,"body":"little hesitant about going"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":318.21,"endTime":320.7,"body":"because I was like Joe Rogan?"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":320.73,"endTime":325.41,"body":"Well, I like it. I don't know, I"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":320.73,"endTime":325.41,"body":"kind of feel a little lukewarm"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":325.41,"endTime":328.5,"body":"about his podcast. Sometimes"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":325.41,"endTime":328.5,"body":"he's also just a very assertive"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":328.5,"endTime":332.49,"body":"personality. And that doesn't"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":328.5,"endTime":332.49,"body":"always jive with me. But I had a"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":332.49,"endTime":336.18,"body":"great time. And I really enjoyed"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":332.49,"endTime":336.18,"body":"the show. And I am proud of Joe"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":336.18,"endTime":340.47,"body":"Rogan, I think he puts on a good"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":336.18,"endTime":340.47,"body":"show. I think he has a pretty"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":340.47,"endTime":344.22,"body":"varied point of view. And he"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":340.47,"endTime":344.22,"body":"tries to be inquisitive, because"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":344.22,"endTime":349.83,"body":"he brought up like, he brought"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":344.22,"endTime":349.83,"body":"up a lot of controversial things"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":349.83,"endTime":354.93,"body":"about himself during the act"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":349.83,"endTime":354.93,"body":"like he brought up. The"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":354.93,"endTime":357.48,"body":"internet's pretty hard on him."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":354.93,"endTime":357.48,"body":"And he brought up a few things"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":357.48,"endTime":361.02,"body":"that the internet has said about"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":357.48,"endTime":361.02,"body":"him in recent years. And he"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":361.02,"endTime":365.16,"body":"didn't exactly challenge them."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":361.02,"endTime":365.16,"body":"It's more like he was thinking"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":365.16,"endTime":372.0,"body":"about them on stage. And I like"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":365.16,"endTime":372.0,"body":"that he can face his opponents"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":372.03,"endTime":376.92,"body":"or his enemies, publicly, like"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":372.03,"endTime":376.92,"body":"he publicly admits that he's"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":376.92,"endTime":381.03,"body":"wrong, or that he should have"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":376.92,"endTime":381.03,"body":"done things differently pretty"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":381.03,"endTime":386.91,"body":"often, for such a big celebrity,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":381.03,"endTime":386.91,"body":"you know, I don't know, he's not"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":386.91,"endTime":392.16,"body":"all bad, I think. I think social"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":386.91,"endTime":392.16,"body":"media and critics give them a"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":392.16,"endTime":395.73,"body":"bad rap. I know my Twitter feed"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":392.16,"endTime":395.73,"body":"is a lot of feminists and"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":397.73,"endTime":403.64,"body":"people like me, who tend to"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":397.73,"endTime":403.64,"body":"critique men pretty hard. So my"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":403.64,"endTime":408.26,"body":"Twitter feed doesn't like Joe"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":403.64,"endTime":408.26,"body":"Rogan. But I'm here to say, give"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":408.26,"endTime":411.35,"body":"them a chance, give the man a"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":408.26,"endTime":411.35,"body":"chance, they have something to"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":411.35,"endTime":415.82,"body":"offer. And it was just really"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":411.35,"endTime":415.82,"body":"cool to go with my boyfriend and"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":415.82,"endTime":420.5,"body":"see him have such a good time."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":415.82,"endTime":420.5,"body":"Like I think I'm the planner in"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":420.5,"endTime":422.96,"body":"the relationship. So I'm usually"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":420.5,"endTime":422.96,"body":"like, we should go do this. We"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":422.96,"endTime":425.81,"body":"should go, you know, hang out"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":422.96,"endTime":425.81,"body":"with these people or make this"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":425.81,"endTime":428.36,"body":"event happen. And I tried to"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":425.81,"endTime":428.36,"body":"plan things and make them"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":428.36,"endTime":434.18,"body":"happen. Joseph doesn't always do"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":428.36,"endTime":434.18,"body":"that. He impulsively gets us to"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":434.18,"endTime":437.51,"body":"do things sometimes"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":434.18,"endTime":437.51,"body":"spontaneously, but it was nice"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":437.51,"endTime":443.0,"body":"to actually have a plan with him"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":437.51,"endTime":443.0,"body":"and see his friends and go do"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":443.0,"endTime":446.03,"body":"something that you know, my"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":443.0,"endTime":446.03,"body":"partner wants to do instead of"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":446.03,"endTime":450.59,"body":"just something only I want to"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":446.03,"endTime":450.59,"body":"do. It was good to switch roles"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":450.59,"endTime":456.92,"body":"in that way. This episode, we"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":450.59,"endTime":456.92,"body":"have a pretty serious discussion"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":456.95,"endTime":462.41,"body":"about depression, sobriety"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":456.95,"endTime":462.41,"body":"trigger warning we do bring up"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":462.41,"endTime":466.43,"body":"suicide. So if you're not cool"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":462.41,"endTime":466.43,"body":"with that, maybe don't listen to"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":466.43,"endTime":472.43,"body":"this one. But overall, it's a"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":466.43,"endTime":472.43,"body":"pretty hopeful, motivating and"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":473.39,"endTime":478.79,"body":"dare I say it inspiring story."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":473.39,"endTime":478.79,"body":"Our guest is a fellow podcaster"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":479.03,"endTime":483.32,"body":"he hosts the podcast ambition"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":479.03,"endTime":483.32,"body":"radio. I'd like to welcome Chris"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":483.35,"endTime":484.22,"body":"Tondevold"},{"speaker":"Theme Song","startTime":484.22,"endTime":487.31,"body":"guest interview / a"},{"speaker":"Theme Song","startTime":484.22,"endTime":487.31,"body":"friend for you / strangers whose"},{"speaker":"Theme Song","startTime":487.31,"endTime":490.79,"body":"issues are relatable / guest"},{"speaker":"Theme Song","startTime":487.31,"endTime":490.79,"body":"interview / They're the voice"},{"speaker":"Theme Song","startTime":490.79,"endTime":493.52,"body":"that's new / this person has"},{"speaker":"Theme Song","startTime":490.79,"endTime":493.52,"body":"problems and they don't mind"},{"speaker":"Theme Song","startTime":493.52,"endTime":497.39,"body":"discussing it, but they still"},{"speaker":"Theme Song","startTime":493.52,"endTime":497.39,"body":"need a therapist / (Whos not"},{"speaker":"Theme Song","startTime":497.39,"endTime":498.98,"body":"me)"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":499.22,"endTime":501.47,"body":"Welcome back to"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":499.22,"endTime":501.47,"body":"Therapy Roulette. My name is"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":501.47,"endTime":504.98,"body":"Michele Baci, and today we're"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":501.47,"endTime":504.98,"body":"joined with Chris Tondevold he"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":504.98,"endTime":508.76,"body":"is the host of Ambition Radio"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":504.98,"endTime":508.76,"body":"Podcast, Chris, welcome to the"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":508.76,"endTime":509.12,"body":"show."},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":509.39,"endTime":511.67,"body":"Thank you for"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":509.39,"endTime":511.67,"body":"having me. Of course. It's"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":511.67,"endTime":514.85,"body":"a pleasure. How is"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":511.67,"endTime":514.85,"body":"how's your current mood?"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":514.85,"endTime":517.97,"body":"Anything intense right now? or"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":514.85,"endTime":517.97,"body":"How you feeling?"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":518.24,"endTime":522.32,"body":"Oh, I feel all"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":518.24,"endTime":522.32,"body":"right. Um, I was actually on a"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":522.38,"endTime":526.52,"body":"another call earlier today that"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":522.38,"endTime":526.52,"body":"I met new people, which was"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":526.52,"endTime":527.3,"body":"cool."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":527.42,"endTime":528.11,"body":"busy."},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":528.32,"endTime":533.45,"body":"You busy busy"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":528.32,"endTime":533.45,"body":"people? Yep. So yeah, I mean, I"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":533.45,"endTime":539.54,"body":"feel good. It's been. It's my"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":533.45,"endTime":539.54,"body":"first full week back at work"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":539.54,"endTime":543.77,"body":"after recovering from back"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":539.54,"endTime":543.77,"body":"surgery. So it's been a very"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":543.77,"endTime":545.96,"body":"physically draining"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":546.29,"endTime":548.03,"body":"week to say the least."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":548.39,"endTime":550.46,"body":"How much time did"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":548.39,"endTime":550.46,"body":"you get off to recover?"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":550.73,"endTime":553.4,"body":"Oh, almost"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":550.73,"endTime":553.4,"body":"almost three months? It was."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":553.64,"endTime":554.36,"body":"Oh, that's good."},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":554.54,"endTime":556.85,"body":"Just about two"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":554.54,"endTime":556.85,"body":"and a half, almost three months."},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":556.85,"endTime":563.18,"body":"Yeah. The crappy thing about all"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":556.85,"endTime":563.18,"body":"of it? Is that my back supposed"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":563.18,"endTime":566.87,"body":"to feel better, but now I can't"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":563.18,"endTime":566.87,"body":"sit down. It'll just hurt the"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":566.87,"endTime":567.56,"body":"entire time."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":567.99,"endTime":569.49,"body":"Are you sitting"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":567.99,"endTime":569.49,"body":"now? No."},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":569.52,"endTime":573.96,"body":"I'm standing. I"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":569.52,"endTime":573.96,"body":"got a little standing desk. And"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":573.96,"endTime":576.78,"body":"all my chairs at work are these"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":573.96,"endTime":576.78,"body":"like hard wooden chairs and"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":576.78,"endTime":579.96,"body":"they're just terrible. Oh, no."},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":576.78,"endTime":579.96,"body":"Yeah, I'm constantly going up"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":579.96,"endTime":583.92,"body":"and down, up and down. And it is"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":579.96,"endTime":583.92,"body":"a though the worst part about"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":583.92,"endTime":586.68,"body":"the whole thing. Everything else"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":583.92,"endTime":586.68,"body":"feels fine. I can stand walk."},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":586.77,"endTime":587.67,"body":"Cool. No problem."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":588.39,"endTime":590.34,"body":"Yeah, but that's a"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":588.39,"endTime":590.34,"body":"hard adjustment to not be able"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":590.34,"endTime":590.85,"body":"to sit."},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":591.51,"endTime":593.64,"body":"Yeah, yeah, I"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":591.51,"endTime":593.64,"body":"could sit before surgery. So"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":594.3,"endTime":595.2,"body":"what that means now,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":596.04,"endTime":597.96,"body":"did they say"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":596.04,"endTime":597.96,"body":"that's gonna get better"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":598.56,"endTime":603.6,"body":"uh, they hope"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":598.56,"endTime":603.6,"body":"So because it was so like low"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":603.66,"endTime":608.37,"body":"down into the the back, there's"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":603.66,"endTime":608.37,"body":"just so much pressure that gets"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":608.37,"endTime":613.05,"body":"put in to that area. So it's the"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":608.37,"endTime":613.05,"body":"L five s one. And they normally"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":613.05,"endTime":616.5,"body":"do them a little bit higher up,"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":613.05,"endTime":616.5,"body":"which doesn't cause as much"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":616.5,"endTime":621.75,"body":"pressure, but I got screws and"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":616.5,"endTime":621.75,"body":"some bone views in in there. And"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":622.02,"endTime":627.93,"body":"wow, I'm doing some work. So"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":622.02,"endTime":627.93,"body":"they say about two years for the"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":627.93,"endTime":631.41,"body":"full fusion to where I'll feel"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":627.93,"endTime":631.41,"body":"like a almost bionic"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":631.53,"endTime":635.46,"body":"maybe. Is that the"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":631.53,"endTime":635.46,"body":"name of the surgery l five s"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":635.46,"endTime":635.82,"body":"one."},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":635.94,"endTime":639.6,"body":"Oh, I'm sorry."},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":635.94,"endTime":639.6,"body":"So the in your spine you have"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":640.05,"endTime":645.45,"body":"each each bone is an L or an S."},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":640.05,"endTime":645.45,"body":"So the ones up,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":646.26,"endTime":647.04,"body":"not a doctor."},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":649.44,"endTime":652.65,"body":"The ones the"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":649.44,"endTime":652.65,"body":"ones that are near the top are"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":652.65,"endTime":658.53,"body":"ELLs, and then it goes in"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":652.65,"endTime":658.53,"body":"descending order, I think. And"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":658.53,"endTime":661.29,"body":"then the ones that are near the"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":658.53,"endTime":661.29,"body":"esses are like towards your"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":661.29,"endTime":669.36,"body":"tailbone. So mine rest right"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":661.29,"endTime":669.36,"body":"around that hip, pelvis area. So"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":669.36,"endTime":673.32,"body":"it's literally like any kind of"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":669.36,"endTime":673.32,"body":"sitting motion were sitting"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":673.32,"endTime":676.86,"body":"motion. But like any kind of"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":673.32,"endTime":676.86,"body":"angle where I'm almost 90"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":676.86,"endTime":679.86,"body":"degrees sitting on my butt."},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":676.86,"endTime":679.86,"body":"That's where all the pressure"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":679.86,"endTime":683.04,"body":"goes. Because it's pretty much"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":679.86,"endTime":683.04,"body":"right inside that that pelvis"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":683.04,"endTime":688.89,"body":"area for it. So all of my upper"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":683.04,"endTime":688.89,"body":"body just goes right to put some"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":689.34,"endTime":690.24,"body":"some nice pressure"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":691.62,"endTime":694.65,"body":"cuts a long"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":691.62,"endTime":694.65,"body":"recovery time. I wish you the"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":694.65,"endTime":696.24,"body":"best through that process."},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":696.42,"endTime":700.71,"body":"Thank you."},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":696.42,"endTime":700.71,"body":"Thank you, I got easy. No, I got"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":700.71,"endTime":705.57,"body":"hit in 2015 and 2017. So I've"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":700.71,"endTime":705.57,"body":"been dealing with a bulging disc"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":705.9,"endTime":710.52,"body":"in my back for like six years"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":705.9,"endTime":710.52,"body":"now. So hopefully this will fix"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":710.52,"endTime":710.7,"body":"it."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":711.179,"endTime":712.919,"body":"You got hit how"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":713.16,"endTime":716.58,"body":"I got rear"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":713.16,"endTime":716.58,"body":"ended both times. So the first"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":716.58,"endTime":719.1,"body":"one I got rear ended and then"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":716.58,"endTime":719.1,"body":"pushed into the vehicle in front"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":719.1,"endTime":722.97,"body":"of me. And then the other one,"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":719.1,"endTime":722.97,"body":"this big yellow Dodge Ram just"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":723.18,"endTime":728.16,"body":"could not stop. So he just took"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":723.18,"endTime":728.16,"body":"me pushed me right into almost"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":728.16,"endTime":733.86,"body":"the intersection. And my God."},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":728.16,"endTime":733.86,"body":"Yeah, it was. It was wild. So"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":733.86,"endTime":737.07,"body":"the the chronic pain of it all."},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":733.86,"endTime":737.07,"body":"And this is in"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":737.1,"endTime":740.76,"body":"Maryland? Yes."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":737.1,"endTime":740.76,"body":"Wow. I did not know they were"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":740.76,"endTime":742.11,"body":"that aggressive in Maryland."},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":742.2,"endTime":744.87,"body":"They're"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":742.2,"endTime":744.87,"body":"terrible drivers. They're not"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":744.87,"endTime":751.86,"body":"good. Most of the Maryland"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":744.87,"endTime":751.86,"body":"Virginia and DC area suck. The"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":751.86,"endTime":756.69,"body":"the road I was on is like a 35"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":751.86,"endTime":756.69,"body":"or 45. But everybody usually"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":756.69,"endTime":763.29,"body":"goes 55 at least. So that's part"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":756.69,"endTime":763.29,"body":"of the problem. And then people"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":763.29,"endTime":766.47,"body":"don't know how to make decisions"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":763.29,"endTime":766.47,"body":"or use turn signals. So they go"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":766.47,"endTime":766.95,"body":"in and out."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":767.37,"endTime":770.88,"body":"Yeah, we have that"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":767.37,"endTime":770.88,"body":"problem in LA but I don't know"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":770.88,"endTime":774.03,"body":"so far. I've been lucky knock on"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":770.88,"endTime":774.03,"body":"wood, but I've seen a lot of"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":774.03,"endTime":777.84,"body":"horror on the streets or on the"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":774.03,"endTime":777.84,"body":"streets. I like that. Yeah."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":777.93,"endTime":781.98,"body":"Well, good luck with your"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":777.93,"endTime":781.98,"body":"recovery. We could switch gears"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":781.98,"endTime":785.16,"body":"and talk about mental health."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":781.98,"endTime":785.16,"body":"Are you in therapy for your"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":785.16,"endTime":787.38,"body":"mind? Or have you done in the"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":785.16,"endTime":787.38,"body":"past?"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":787.949,"endTime":792.629,"body":"Yes. So the"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":787.949,"endTime":792.629,"body":"beginning of this year, late"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":792.629,"endTime":800.699,"body":"last year? I I was pretty much"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":792.629,"endTime":800.699,"body":"done with with feeling like shit"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":800.729,"endTime":804.929,"body":"all the time. I"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":805.23,"endTime":806.67,"body":"get to come to"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":805.23,"endTime":806.67,"body":"that conclusion."},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":806.7,"endTime":810.45,"body":"Yeah, yeah. I"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":806.7,"endTime":810.45,"body":"was just real sad and like just"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":810.48,"endTime":814.35,"body":"crying randomly, at just"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":810.48,"endTime":814.35,"body":"whatever was around me. And I"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":814.35,"endTime":815.88,"body":"was just like, this is probably"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":814.35,"endTime":815.88,"body":"not healthy."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":816.27,"endTime":819.6,"body":"Yeah, like a gust"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":816.27,"endTime":819.6,"body":"of wind or something. Yeah,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":819.6,"endTime":820.05,"body":"yeah."},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":820.05,"endTime":822.15,"body":"Or like a"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":820.05,"endTime":822.15,"body":"feather or something just"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":822.15,"endTime":826.74,"body":"floating. It was a lot. It was"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":822.15,"endTime":826.74,"body":"it was weird. It was just a lot"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":826.74,"endTime":829.23,"body":"of like TV shows that I was"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":826.74,"endTime":829.23,"body":"watching and then all of a"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":829.23,"endTime":831.06,"body":"sudden, it'll just be like,"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":829.23,"endTime":831.06,"body":"well, I'm sad now."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":832.14,"endTime":832.8,"body":"Oh, no."},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":833.79,"endTime":837.99,"body":"I so there was"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":833.79,"endTime":837.99,"body":"the the thing that happened to"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":837.99,"endTime":841.02,"body":"me like the beginning of"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":837.99,"endTime":841.02,"body":"quarantine to that kind of"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":841.02,"endTime":845.04,"body":"spirals into all this was I had"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":841.02,"endTime":845.04,"body":"to put my dog down right at the"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":845.04,"endTime":847.86,"body":"beginning of quarantine last"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":845.04,"endTime":847.86,"body":"year for COVID."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":848.52,"endTime":849.75,"body":"That sucks. I'm"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":848.52,"endTime":849.75,"body":"sorry."},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":849.93,"endTime":853.68,"body":"Thank you. It's"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":849.93,"endTime":853.68,"body":"It was a lot. And that was my"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":853.68,"endTime":858.93,"body":"first dog as an adult that like"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":853.68,"endTime":858.93,"body":"I was responsible for so there's"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":859.35,"endTime":862.35,"body":"I've been dealing with probably"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":859.35,"endTime":862.35,"body":"depression for a while but there"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":862.35,"endTime":865.23,"body":"was just that breaking point for"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":862.35,"endTime":865.23,"body":"that and then just trying to go"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":865.23,"endTime":868.11,"body":"throughout the rest of the year"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":865.23,"endTime":868.11,"body":"with it. And then it was just"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":868.11,"endTime":870.78,"body":"like well, all the tears are"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":868.11,"endTime":870.78,"body":"happening. So I'm going to go to"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":870.78,"endTime":874.92,"body":"the doctor and get get"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":870.78,"endTime":874.92,"body":"Wellbutrin for that and then"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":875.79,"endTime":881.16,"body":"started seeing therapists in"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":875.79,"endTime":881.16,"body":"January for the first time. So"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":881.22,"endTime":883.56,"body":"it's been it's been interesting."},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":881.22,"endTime":883.56,"body":"I've been through two of them so"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":883.56,"endTime":883.92,"body":"far."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":884.49,"endTime":887.61,"body":"So did they put"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":884.49,"endTime":887.61,"body":"you on meds right away before"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":887.61,"endTime":889.05,"body":"you saw someone to talk to you?"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":889.26,"endTime":892.74,"body":"Yeah, they put"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":889.26,"endTime":892.74,"body":"me on meds right away. Because"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":892.77,"endTime":895.77,"body":"the the questionnaire that I"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":892.77,"endTime":895.77,"body":"guess you fill out for like"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":895.8,"endTime":899.37,"body":"depression or anxiety or"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":895.8,"endTime":899.37,"body":"whatever. I got like a really"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":899.37,"endTime":901.68,"body":"low score on They were just"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":899.37,"endTime":901.68,"body":"like, well, we'll try to fix it"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":901.68,"endTime":903.9,"body":"now, because we need to."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":904.89,"endTime":906.69,"body":"Are you okay with"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":904.89,"endTime":906.69,"body":"that? Was that something you"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":906.69,"endTime":909.39,"body":"would thought about? Like you"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":906.69,"endTime":909.39,"body":"want us to go on"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":909.48,"endTime":910.62,"body":"antidepressants?"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":910.68,"endTime":913.23,"body":"Yeah, cuz like"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":910.68,"endTime":913.23,"body":"a lot of my friends have been on"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":913.23,"endTime":916.98,"body":"them throughout the years, and"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":913.23,"endTime":916.98,"body":"we were able to kind of like"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":916.98,"endTime":920.31,"body":"talk about it a little bit more"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":916.98,"endTime":920.31,"body":"now, especially that it's"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":920.31,"endTime":926.22,"body":"slightly more normalized. But we"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":920.31,"endTime":926.22,"body":"all, especially last year, like,"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":926.4,"endTime":928.74,"body":"there was just so many people"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":926.4,"endTime":928.74,"body":"that were coming to head with"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":929.16,"endTime":934.83,"body":"their, their mental health. So I"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":929.16,"endTime":934.83,"body":"was cool. There wasn't a stigma"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":934.86,"endTime":940.68,"body":"or anything with with the"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":934.86,"endTime":940.68,"body":"dannette presence. If it was"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":940.68,"endTime":945.24,"body":"just, it was gonna make me feel"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":940.68,"endTime":945.24,"body":"better. I'm golden. So we'll"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":945.24,"endTime":949.32,"body":"try. I've been taking all sorts"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":945.24,"endTime":949.32,"body":"of meds since I've been a kid."},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":949.32,"endTime":953.37,"body":"So they work for the most part."},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":949.32,"endTime":953.37,"body":"So let's give it a shot."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":954.06,"endTime":957.66,"body":"Yeah. And then"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":954.06,"endTime":957.66,"body":"when you started talking to"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":957.66,"endTime":960.15,"body":"someone was that additionally"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":957.66,"endTime":960.15,"body":"helpful?"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":961.14,"endTime":966.51,"body":"Kind of the,"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":961.14,"endTime":966.51,"body":"the first therapist that I saw"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":966.54,"endTime":971.13,"body":"was, she's she was been a"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":966.54,"endTime":971.13,"body":"therapist for like, 50 or 60"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":971.13,"endTime":971.73,"body":"years."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":972.12,"endTime":975.78,"body":"Okay, so she's"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":972.12,"endTime":975.78,"body":"deep in her career. Yeah. And"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":975.78,"endTime":979.32,"body":"there's a big"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":975.78,"endTime":979.32,"body":"generational gap. And then there"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":979.32,"endTime":986.22,"body":"is she, she didn't bear it down"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":979.32,"endTime":986.22,"body":"too hard. But the she was very"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":986.22,"endTime":990.0,"body":"much a Christian faith. And it"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":986.22,"endTime":990.0,"body":"kind of coalesced with some of"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":990.0,"endTime":993.78,"body":"the things that she were saying,"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":990.0,"endTime":993.78,"body":"and I'm not. And that kind of"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":993.81,"endTime":998.04,"body":"turned me off through it, where"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":993.81,"endTime":998.04,"body":"I know that she was skilled. And"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":998.04,"endTime":1001.91,"body":"she was able to kind of like,"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":998.04,"endTime":1001.91,"body":"obviously had a long term"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":1001.91,"endTime":1006.2,"body":"career, right. But it just did"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":1001.91,"endTime":1006.2,"body":"not connect with me. And like"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":1006.2,"endTime":1009.98,"body":"she would go through some not"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":1006.2,"endTime":1009.98,"body":"really Proverbs, but like, do"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":1010.01,"endTime":1013.76,"body":"comparisons to try to make it a"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":1010.01,"endTime":1013.76,"body":"little bit more secular. But it"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":1013.76,"endTime":1015.05,"body":"just did not jive at all."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1015.47,"endTime":1020.0,"body":"Are you not"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1015.47,"endTime":1020.0,"body":"religious? Yeah. So I've had"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1020.0,"endTime":1023.84,"body":"one, I had this couples"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1020.0,"endTime":1023.84,"body":"therapist in quarantine, who"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1023.87,"endTime":1026.87,"body":"started by saying, Hey, I'm"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1023.87,"endTime":1026.87,"body":"Christian, do you want me to"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1026.87,"endTime":1029.33,"body":"bring that into this? Or do you"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1026.87,"endTime":1029.33,"body":"want me to leave it out. And I"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1029.33,"endTime":1032.0,"body":"appreciate that she was pretty"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1029.33,"endTime":1032.0,"body":"upfront about it. That's"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1032.0,"endTime":1035.42,"body":"fantastic. And she also seemed"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1032.0,"endTime":1035.42,"body":"very, like easygoing, like she"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1035.42,"endTime":1038.9,"body":"was in California, which is"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1035.42,"endTime":1038.9,"body":"where I am. Everyone out here is"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1038.9,"endTime":1043.46,"body":"weird, and like spiritual and"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1038.9,"endTime":1043.46,"body":"earthy. So if you're religious,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1043.46,"endTime":1047.48,"body":"I just kind of put it into that"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1043.46,"endTime":1047.48,"body":"category. So I was able to look"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1047.48,"endTime":1050.15,"body":"past that. And she didn't bring"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1047.48,"endTime":1050.15,"body":"it into the sessions at all. If"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1050.15,"endTime":1053.24,"body":"she you know, if she was"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1050.15,"endTime":1053.24,"body":"analyzing us in a Christian way,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1053.36,"endTime":1056.27,"body":"Soviet, but she didn't talk"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1053.36,"endTime":1056.27,"body":"about it. So for me, it was"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1056.27,"endTime":1060.56,"body":"okay. But if someone was overly"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1056.27,"endTime":1060.56,"body":"like, this is all about Jesus."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1060.59,"endTime":1063.83,"body":"And here's your relationship"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1060.59,"endTime":1063.83,"body":"with the Lord. I think that"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1063.83,"endTime":1065.03,"body":"would turn me off to"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":1065.63,"endTime":1069.5,"body":"Yeah, and it"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":1065.63,"endTime":1069.5,"body":"wasn't even like super, super"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":1069.53,"endTime":1072.83,"body":"overt, but it was just like the"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":1069.53,"endTime":1072.83,"body":"parables that she would use,"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":1072.83,"endTime":1077.45,"body":"right? or trying to like, make,"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":1072.83,"endTime":1077.45,"body":"make sure that I know that."},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":1077.87,"endTime":1083.15,"body":"There's an angel out there for"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":1077.87,"endTime":1083.15,"body":"me. Sure. Maybe. Yeah. I won't"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":1083.15,"endTime":1084.98,"body":"find out like, it'll be fine."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1085.58,"endTime":1088.07,"body":"That's kind of"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1085.58,"endTime":1088.07,"body":"tricky, because it's so much"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1088.07,"endTime":1092.51,"body":"about the language. Yes, yeah."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1088.07,"endTime":1092.51,"body":"Because you can easily get that"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1092.51,"endTime":1096.11,"body":"same message across like, you're"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1092.51,"endTime":1096.11,"body":"trying to say, hey, someone's"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1096.29,"endTime":1099.62,"body":"out there for you, whether it's"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1096.29,"endTime":1099.62,"body":"like a real person or spirit."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1100.55,"endTime":1103.19,"body":"But then to make your religious"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1100.55,"endTime":1103.19,"body":"when your your clients not"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1103.19,"endTime":1105.26,"body":"religious kind of turns them"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1103.19,"endTime":1105.26,"body":"off,"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":1105.32,"endTime":1108.56,"body":"and not having"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":1105.32,"endTime":1108.56,"body":"that conversation upfront to"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":1108.56,"endTime":1111.56,"body":"like what yours had, I mean,"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":1108.56,"endTime":1111.56,"body":"that that would have been just a"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":1111.56,"endTime":1115.43,"body":"great talking point, all"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":1111.56,"endTime":1115.43,"body":"throughout it to say, Okay, this"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":1116.18,"endTime":1120.41,"body":"may not jive at all, like all,"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":1116.18,"endTime":1120.41,"body":"and hopefully they're good"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":1120.41,"endTime":1123.86,"body":"enough to where you might"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":1120.41,"endTime":1123.86,"body":"already be at edge if you're not"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":1123.95,"endTime":1126.77,"body":"a religious person, and that"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":1123.95,"endTime":1126.77,"body":"conversation comes up, and you"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":1126.77,"endTime":1129.83,"body":"still try to continue to go"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":1126.77,"endTime":1129.83,"body":"through it. And but it sounds"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":1129.83,"endTime":1134.0,"body":"like they didn't even have that"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":1129.83,"endTime":1134.0,"body":"issue with bringing it up or not"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":1134.0,"endTime":1134.84,"body":"bringing it up, right."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1135.17,"endTime":1138.8,"body":"Yeah. She was just"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1135.17,"endTime":1138.8,"body":"like, this is who I am. This is"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1138.8,"endTime":1141.74,"body":"kind of how I work. Do you want"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1138.8,"endTime":1141.74,"body":"me to bring in religion? And we"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1141.74,"endTime":1144.62,"body":"were like, No, I was like, No,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1141.74,"endTime":1144.62,"body":"my boyfriend didn't have an"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1144.62,"endTime":1150.32,"body":"opinion at the time because I"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1144.62,"endTime":1150.32,"body":"don't want religion. Oh, it's"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1150.32,"endTime":1153.38,"body":"just weird to be it's, I mean,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1150.32,"endTime":1153.38,"body":"maybe if you're a Christian, it"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1153.38,"endTime":1157.07,"body":"makes sense. But if you're not,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1153.38,"endTime":1157.07,"body":"it's a hard divide. Yeah, for"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1157.07,"endTime":1161.87,"body":"sure. For sure. So how long did"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1157.07,"endTime":1161.87,"body":"that therapy relationship last?"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":1162.08,"endTime":1165.83,"body":"Um, actually,"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":1162.08,"endTime":1165.83,"body":"about a month and a half or so."},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":1167.42,"endTime":1173.3,"body":"My, my work has a lot of really"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":1167.42,"endTime":1173.3,"body":"good mental health resources."},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":1173.36,"endTime":1177.77,"body":"And my insurance paid for like"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":1173.36,"endTime":1177.77,"body":"the first six sessions or"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":1177.77,"endTime":1182.15,"body":"something like that. That's"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":1177.77,"endTime":1182.15,"body":"good. Yeah. So they tried to"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":1182.15,"endTime":1186.41,"body":"push us to get help if we need"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":1182.15,"endTime":1186.41,"body":"it. And it was great. So I just"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":1187.1,"endTime":1190.73,"body":"went through the first like six"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":1187.1,"endTime":1190.73,"body":"sessions with her to give it a"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":1190.82,"endTime":1194.87,"body":"solid shot because I didn't want"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":1190.82,"endTime":1194.87,"body":"to give up after two weeks."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1195.29,"endTime":1198.02,"body":"Right? And you"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1195.29,"endTime":1198.02,"body":"want to give it like a real shot"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1198.02,"endTime":1201.74,"body":"too because if anything At least"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1198.02,"endTime":1201.74,"body":"you get something out of it."},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":1202.28,"endTime":1205.49,"body":"Yeah. And"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":1202.28,"endTime":1205.49,"body":"sometimes it takes a little bit"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":1205.49,"endTime":1210.17,"body":"to form a connection. Right?"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":1205.49,"endTime":1210.17,"body":"That that's normal. And I've"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":1210.17,"endTime":1214.4,"body":"heard left and right from all my"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":1210.17,"endTime":1214.4,"body":"other friends whose they they"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":1214.4,"endTime":1217.01,"body":"will never go to another"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":1214.4,"endTime":1217.01,"body":"therapist like that's their"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":1217.01,"endTime":1219.95,"body":"therapist just because of the"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":1217.01,"endTime":1219.95,"body":"connection that's in there. I"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":1219.98,"endTime":1223.37,"body":"kind of hoping that that would"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":1219.98,"endTime":1223.37,"body":"be something that I could like"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":1223.37,"endTime":1225.02,"body":"develop, but it just did not."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1226.34,"endTime":1229.49,"body":"So how did you go"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1226.34,"endTime":1229.49,"body":"about finding a new therapist"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1229.49,"endTime":1230.3,"body":"after that one?"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1231.38,"endTime":1236.87,"body":"Actually, it was it was"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1231.38,"endTime":1236.87,"body":"one of my, one of my reps at my"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1236.87,"endTime":1241.25,"body":"store. He was going to couples"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1236.87,"endTime":1241.25,"body":"therapy originally at this"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1241.25,"endTime":1244.58,"body":"place, and then kept it on for"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1241.25,"endTime":1244.58,"body":"his own personal one, because"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1244.58,"endTime":1249.92,"body":"they split. So he was like, I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1244.58,"endTime":1249.92,"body":"barely pay anything. It was like"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1249.92,"endTime":1251.99,"body":"10 bucks a session. And it's"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1249.92,"endTime":1251.99,"body":"fantastic."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1252.32,"endTime":1254.39,"body":"Yeah. Which is"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1252.32,"endTime":1254.39,"body":"really what therapy should cost?"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1256.1,"endTime":1257.69,"body":"Not the $100 an hour."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1258.8,"endTime":1262.13,"body":"It's a doctor"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1258.8,"endTime":1262.13,"body":"medical service, you know?"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1262.639,"endTime":1265.969,"body":"Exactly, exactly. It"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1262.639,"endTime":1265.969,"body":"was. So it was cool. Like after"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1265.969,"endTime":1270.019,"body":"the six sessions with the first"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1265.969,"endTime":1270.019,"body":"one. It would have been just"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1270.019,"endTime":1274.069,"body":"like a copay golden with that."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1270.019,"endTime":1274.069,"body":"And I don't think everybody has"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1274.069,"endTime":1279.679,"body":"that ability or resource. So I'm"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1274.069,"endTime":1279.679,"body":"very, very appreciative of the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1279.709,"endTime":1282.289,"body":"tools that I have at me, or I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1279.709,"endTime":1282.289,"body":"have at my disposal."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1282.53,"endTime":1285.53,"body":"Yeah. If you have"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1282.53,"endTime":1285.53,"body":"a mental health insurance, go"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1285.53,"endTime":1285.98,"body":"use it."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1286.399,"endTime":1289.999,"body":"Yeah, for sure. For"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1286.399,"endTime":1289.999,"body":"sure. Because it doesn't hurt to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1289.999,"endTime":1297.169,"body":"just talk, right? And then, so I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1289.999,"endTime":1297.169,"body":"emailed the place that he goes,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1297.229,"endTime":1302.509,"body":"he went to, and then got hooked"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1297.229,"endTime":1302.509,"body":"up with my current therapist."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1303.62,"endTime":1306.11,"body":"That's cool. So it"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1303.62,"endTime":1306.11,"body":"seems like your social network,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1306.11,"endTime":1309.29,"body":"you're able to talk about this"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1306.11,"endTime":1309.29,"body":"with your friends. And that"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1309.29,"endTime":1312.77,"body":"helps you like, figure out more"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1309.29,"endTime":1312.77,"body":"of what's going on in your own"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1312.77,"endTime":1314.57,"body":"life and how to get help."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1314.78,"endTime":1321.02,"body":"For sure. I mean, last,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1314.78,"endTime":1321.02,"body":"like December, yeah, December of"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1321.02,"endTime":1325.22,"body":"this year, there was me and a"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1321.02,"endTime":1325.22,"body":"couple of my friends together"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1325.22,"endTime":1329.99,"body":"just around the fire, talking"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1325.22,"endTime":1329.99,"body":"about all of our problems. All"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1329.99,"endTime":1335.75,"body":"the things that we're going"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1329.99,"endTime":1335.75,"body":"through and trying to get better"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1335.75,"endTime":1340.16,"body":"and how important it is. And"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1335.75,"endTime":1340.16,"body":"yeah, so it's everybody's got"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1340.16,"endTime":1343.31,"body":"something. Now for sure"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1340.16,"endTime":1343.31,"body":"everybody's got something going"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1343.31,"endTime":1346.19,"body":"on. And thankfully, they can"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1343.31,"endTime":1346.19,"body":"feel a little bit more"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1346.19,"endTime":1347.12,"body":"comfortable talking about"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1347.119,"endTime":1350.239,"body":"it. Yeah, that's"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1347.119,"endTime":1350.239,"body":"awesome. I feel like sometimes"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1350.239,"endTime":1353.539,"body":"it's hard to start that support"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1350.239,"endTime":1353.539,"body":"system. So if you have it,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1353.539,"endTime":1357.409,"body":"definitely use it and keep"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1353.539,"endTime":1357.409,"body":"reaching out for sure. For sure."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1357.799,"endTime":1363.259,"body":"Yeah, that's so cool. Has, so"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1357.799,"endTime":1363.259,"body":"your dog passed away? And then"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1363.319,"endTime":1366.649,"body":"has that been like the start of"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1363.319,"endTime":1366.649,"body":"a depression? Or do you think"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1366.649,"endTime":1370.189,"body":"you had depression before that"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1366.649,"endTime":1370.189,"body":"and it kind of exasperated?"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1370.22,"endTime":1374.84,"body":"So. I think two things"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1370.22,"endTime":1374.84,"body":"just like, was the straw that"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1374.84,"endTime":1379.07,"body":"broke the camel's back. One"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1374.84,"endTime":1379.07,"body":"definitely, you know, being my"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1379.07,"endTime":1383.69,"body":"dog passing away, but to going"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1379.07,"endTime":1383.69,"body":"to concerts and like stand up"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1383.69,"endTime":1389.57,"body":"shows are my full release. And I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1383.69,"endTime":1389.57,"body":"didn't have that at all for the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1389.57,"endTime":1392.42,"body":"past year, and I still don't"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1389.57,"endTime":1392.42,"body":"feel comfortable fully going to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1392.42,"endTime":1398.84,"body":"them. Yeah. So it was literally"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1392.42,"endTime":1398.84,"body":"like, I'm stuck inside. There's"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1398.84,"endTime":1404.9,"body":"just a big emptiness here. Now,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1398.84,"endTime":1404.9,"body":"and my cat has tried to take"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1404.9,"endTime":1407.78,"body":"over and it hasn't. It's not the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1404.9,"endTime":1407.78,"body":"same."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1408.26,"endTime":1410.21,"body":"Like you tried to"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1408.26,"endTime":1410.21,"body":"fill the void with the cat or"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1410.21,"endTime":1411.77,"body":"the cat has its own motives."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1411.83,"endTime":1416.09,"body":"The cat has its own"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1411.83,"endTime":1416.09,"body":"motives. off to the side when my"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1416.09,"endTime":1419.93,"body":"dog was around, and now she's"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1416.09,"endTime":1419.93,"body":"taken over my entire life and"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1419.93,"endTime":1422.75,"body":"just yelled at me every time"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1419.93,"endTime":1422.75,"body":"that she needs something. And"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1422.75,"endTime":1429.11,"body":"it's usually just food. I forgot"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1422.75,"endTime":1429.11,"body":"what I was saying."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1430.31,"endTime":1433.1,"body":"You were saying?"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1430.31,"endTime":1433.1,"body":"Yeah, entertainments gone right"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1433.1,"endTime":1435.5,"body":"now. Or it's different. It's"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1433.1,"endTime":1435.5,"body":"around."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1435.889,"endTime":1439.339,"body":"So that that whole idea"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1435.889,"endTime":1439.339,"body":"of just being able to like go"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1439.339,"endTime":1441.949,"body":"out and get out of my own"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1439.339,"endTime":1441.949,"body":"headspace and focus on something"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1441.949,"endTime":1446.839,"body":"else and feel good. There was"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1441.949,"endTime":1446.839,"body":"there was no good for me to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1446.839,"endTime":1449.749,"body":"bounce back from or bounce back"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1446.839,"endTime":1449.749,"body":"to."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1450.32,"endTime":1453.95,"body":"Yeah, I'm the same"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1450.32,"endTime":1453.95,"body":"way where it's like, it's been a"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1453.95,"endTime":1457.01,"body":"big motivation my whole life to"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1453.95,"endTime":1457.01,"body":"like, go to a concert, go to a"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1457.04,"endTime":1459.74,"body":"comedy show. Like this is the"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1457.04,"endTime":1459.74,"body":"fun thing I'm doing I can look"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1459.74,"endTime":1463.07,"body":"forward to it. And I've only"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1459.74,"endTime":1463.07,"body":"recently started going back and"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1463.07,"endTime":1466.22,"body":"it does still feel weird and I"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1463.07,"endTime":1466.22,"body":"don't trust anybody. But I've"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1466.22,"endTime":1469.31,"body":"just like slowly been"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1466.22,"endTime":1469.31,"body":"integrating it back into my life"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1469.31,"endTime":1472.1,"body":"and it's it's definitely taken a"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1469.31,"endTime":1472.1,"body":"toll to not have that for so"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1472.1,"endTime":1472.46,"body":"long."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1472.669,"endTime":1477.169,"body":"Yeah, yeah. So that I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1472.669,"endTime":1477.169,"body":"those were just like the the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1477.169,"endTime":1481.429,"body":"Pentacles of it. Like just the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1477.169,"endTime":1481.429,"body":"iceberg on it. Because I think"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1481.429,"endTime":1485.839,"body":"I've always dealt with it. Like"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1481.429,"endTime":1485.839,"body":"I remember multiple times asked"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1485.839,"endTime":1488.719,"body":"my mom when I was growing up to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1485.839,"endTime":1488.719,"body":"be like, I should probably talk"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1488.719,"endTime":1492.499,"body":"to someone like, I don't feel"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1488.719,"endTime":1492.499,"body":"great. And these these are dumb"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1492.499,"endTime":1495.349,"body":"thoughts that I usually have and"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1492.499,"endTime":1495.349,"body":"i don't i don't like them. So"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1496.489,"endTime":1500.809,"body":"she said no. Ah,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1500.84,"endTime":1504.11,"body":"which Come on mom."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1500.84,"endTime":1504.11,"body":"That was like hard for you to"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1504.11,"endTime":1505.49,"body":"ask. Yeah."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1505.76,"endTime":1511.16,"body":"Like 13 1415 like"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1505.76,"endTime":1511.16,"body":"throes of teenage boy dumb"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1511.43,"endTime":1518.36,"body":"nonsense, you know? Yeah. So I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1511.43,"endTime":1518.36,"body":"don't know, I think I think it's"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1518.36,"endTime":1523.25,"body":"changed so much, especially just"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1518.36,"endTime":1523.25,"body":"from my memory of being turned"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1523.25,"endTime":1526.85,"body":"down by my parents to just being"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1523.25,"endTime":1526.85,"body":"like, now they're embracing it"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1526.85,"endTime":1529.64,"body":"like now they're cool with it."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1526.85,"endTime":1529.64,"body":"Because my sister goes to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1529.64,"endTime":1532.97,"body":"therapy. She's been going for"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1529.64,"endTime":1532.97,"body":"years. And my mom's hip to it,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1532.97,"endTime":1536.9,"body":"and she likes it now. But it's"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1532.97,"endTime":1536.9,"body":"really just that perception of"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1536.9,"endTime":1540.92,"body":"it from, you know, days back"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1536.9,"endTime":1540.92,"body":"where it was just like, Oh, your"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1541.16,"endTime":1544.07,"body":"child sick? No, my child is not"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1541.16,"endTime":1544.07,"body":"sick. There's there's no"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1544.07,"endTime":1545.24,"body":"symptoms. It's fine."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1546.47,"endTime":1548.75,"body":"Yeah, I think it"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1546.47,"endTime":1548.75,"body":"was much more extreme in the"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1548.75,"endTime":1552.14,"body":"past, even in the past, like few"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1548.75,"endTime":1552.14,"body":"years. And now it's way more"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1552.62,"endTime":1558.41,"body":"talks about? Yeah, for sure."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1552.62,"endTime":1558.41,"body":"Yeah. So I would say kudos to"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1558.41,"endTime":1560.84,"body":"young Chris, for asking for"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1558.41,"endTime":1560.84,"body":"help, because that's not easy."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1561.14,"endTime":1563.36,"body":"And I wish I had asked for help"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1561.14,"endTime":1563.36,"body":"when I was younger, but I was"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1563.36,"endTime":1566.54,"body":"just like, no, I will bury this"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1563.36,"endTime":1566.54,"body":"inside me, it will make me"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1566.54,"endTime":1570.86,"body":"stronger, I really, probably"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1566.54,"endTime":1570.86,"body":"took a decade off my life. So"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1570.86,"endTime":1572.03,"body":"it's good to ask for help."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1573.17,"endTime":1577.28,"body":"Yeah, I think I would"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1573.17,"endTime":1577.28,"body":"be a way more like put together"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1577.28,"endTime":1583.25,"body":"individual, if that happened."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1577.28,"endTime":1583.25,"body":"Because being being just living"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1583.25,"endTime":1586.31,"body":"precariously the entire time,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1583.25,"endTime":1586.31,"body":"and just like hoping for things"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1586.31,"endTime":1588.53,"body":"to work out is not the best"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1586.31,"endTime":1588.53,"body":"approach to life, you should"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1588.53,"endTime":1591.47,"body":"probably like have a good"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1588.53,"endTime":1591.47,"body":"foundation at some point."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1592.01,"endTime":1595.19,"body":"Having like, any"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1592.01,"endTime":1595.19,"body":"guidance, any professional"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1595.22,"endTime":1599.33,"body":"wisdom to you know, put into"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1595.22,"endTime":1599.33,"body":"your brain that helps so much."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1601.16,"endTime":1603.74,"body":"Instead of just being like, I'm"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1601.16,"endTime":1603.74,"body":"gonna write in this journal, and"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1603.83,"endTime":1607.01,"body":"write poems like that doesn't"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1603.83,"endTime":1607.01,"body":"work doesn't work all the time."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1607.34,"endTime":1611.24,"body":"I mean, that it doesn't"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1607.34,"endTime":1611.24,"body":"work. If there's no one to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1611.24,"endTime":1614.06,"body":"analyze what you're saying. And"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1611.24,"endTime":1614.06,"body":"being like, these are your"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1614.06,"endTime":1620.93,"body":"problems, right? Let me help you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1614.06,"endTime":1620.93,"body":"look at your problems. And the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1620.93,"endTime":1624.8,"body":"whole, like, burying of the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1620.93,"endTime":1624.8,"body":"whole thing, you know, I always"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1624.8,"endTime":1627.71,"body":"think about just parents just"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1624.8,"endTime":1627.71,"body":"not wanting to talk about it and"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1627.71,"endTime":1629.06,"body":"like refusing to acknowledge it."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1629.78,"endTime":1633.59,"body":"Yeah, yeah, I"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1629.78,"endTime":1633.59,"body":"think my, I mean, I had Catholic"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1633.59,"endTime":1637.25,"body":"parents growing up. So I feel"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1633.59,"endTime":1637.25,"body":"like we didn't talk about"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1637.43,"endTime":1640.7,"body":"feelings. So to talk about like"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1637.43,"endTime":1640.7,"body":"therapy would have been a whole"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1640.7,"endTime":1644.93,"body":"other monster to overcome,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1640.7,"endTime":1644.93,"body":"right? Like, eventually, we got"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1644.93,"endTime":1647.87,"body":"around to it, because of one of"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1644.93,"endTime":1647.87,"body":"my siblings asking for help. And"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1647.87,"endTime":1651.53,"body":"now my mom's totally cool with"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1647.87,"endTime":1651.53,"body":"it, but it took other events to"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1651.53,"endTime":1652.01,"body":"happen."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1652.16,"endTime":1655.58,"body":"Yeah. Yeah. So I'm"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1652.16,"endTime":1655.58,"body":"really weird how that works out."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1655.94,"endTime":1659.15,"body":"I have more hope"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1655.94,"endTime":1659.15,"body":"for the new generation. Yeah."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1659.42,"endTime":1661.67,"body":"Because the the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1659.42,"endTime":1661.67,"body":"generation that's, that's, you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1661.67,"endTime":1666.74,"body":"know, popping kids out now are"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1661.67,"endTime":1666.74,"body":"easily able to talk about it. So"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1666.77,"endTime":1670.13,"body":"that'll hopefully just continue"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1666.77,"endTime":1670.13,"body":"to happen. And we get better and"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1670.13,"endTime":1670.43,"body":"better."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1671.09,"endTime":1676.07,"body":"Yeah, I think so."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1671.09,"endTime":1676.07,"body":"I have good faith. So do you"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1676.07,"endTime":1677.96,"body":"want to tell us about sobriety?"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1678.53,"endTime":1684.11,"body":"Sure. So I've been"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1678.53,"endTime":1684.11,"body":"sober. I want to say like, five"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1684.11,"endTime":1685.16,"body":"years or so"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1686.78,"endTime":1689.81,"body":"you'd have a date"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1686.78,"endTime":1689.81,"body":"that you celebrate? No."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1692.39,"endTime":1695.3,"body":"So I probably should,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1692.39,"endTime":1695.3,"body":"because it was an important"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1695.3,"endTime":1700.13,"body":"thing. But it all kind of goes"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1695.3,"endTime":1700.13,"body":"along with the depression and"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1700.13,"endTime":1705.23,"body":"all that stuff. So all related."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1700.13,"endTime":1705.23,"body":"Yeah, I was I was drinking real"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1705.23,"endTime":1710.69,"body":"real hard for a while. And I was"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1705.23,"endTime":1710.69,"body":"drinking, usually. not usually,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1710.69,"endTime":1714.44,"body":"but a lot of times by myself."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1710.69,"endTime":1714.44,"body":"And I would feel good like"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1714.44,"endTime":1717.8,"body":"around other people. But as soon"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1714.44,"endTime":1717.8,"body":"as I get home, just like, all"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1717.8,"endTime":1720.98,"body":"the inner thoughts, just like"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1717.8,"endTime":1720.98,"body":"you're terrible, just go right"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1720.98,"endTime":1724.79,"body":"through me. And then it's just"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1720.98,"endTime":1724.79,"body":"like an echo chamber. echo"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1724.79,"endTime":1729.98,"body":"chamber until I pass out, right."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1724.79,"endTime":1729.98,"body":"But I had blacked out one night"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1730.01,"endTime":1733.97,"body":"and then woke up in the middle"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1730.01,"endTime":1733.97,"body":"of trying to kill myself. Oh, my"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1733.97,"endTime":1741.08,"body":"God. Yeah. So that that right"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1733.97,"endTime":1741.08,"body":"there stopped me from drinking"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1741.08,"endTime":1748.7,"body":"for the most part going forward."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1741.08,"endTime":1748.7,"body":"And I remember, I basically went"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1748.7,"endTime":1755.09,"body":"cold turkey. Cuz I was just"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1748.7,"endTime":1755.09,"body":"afraid of what well would happen"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1755.96,"endTime":1762.71,"body":"with without any kind of control"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1755.96,"endTime":1762.71,"body":"anymore. And I remember I want"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1762.71,"endTime":1766.4,"body":"to say it was about three weeks"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1762.71,"endTime":1766.4,"body":"after I tried to quit. I saw my"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1766.4,"endTime":1770.54,"body":"parents and I told them that I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1766.4,"endTime":1770.54,"body":"was like, Hey, I'm going to I'm"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1770.57,"endTime":1775.13,"body":"quitting drinking. You know, I'm"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1770.57,"endTime":1775.13,"body":"trying to stay sober. They're"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1775.13,"endTime":1780.47,"body":"like, No, you're not. Let's go"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1775.13,"endTime":1780.47,"body":"to the bar. Oh, no. And that"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1780.47,"endTime":1786.02,"body":"happened. They were they live in"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1780.47,"endTime":1786.02,"body":"the mountains of North Carolina,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1786.05,"endTime":1790.43,"body":"and it gets real real hot in the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1786.05,"endTime":1790.43,"body":"summer. And I was a dark beer"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1790.43,"endTime":1793.43,"body":"drinker, but I was literally"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1790.43,"endTime":1793.43,"body":"like the only one in the bar"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1793.49,"endTime":1798.23,"body":"that's been around that area, I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1793.49,"endTime":1798.23,"body":"guess. So they had all this dark"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1798.23,"endTime":1803.03,"body":"ale and it was all for me. And I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1798.23,"endTime":1803.03,"body":"drank way too much of it. I was"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1803.03,"endTime":1806.27,"body":"super hot and then just got my"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1803.03,"endTime":1806.27,"body":"revenge by throwing up all over"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1806.27,"endTime":1807.08,"body":"their bathroom."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1807.29,"endTime":1811.04,"body":"Oh my gosh, do"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1807.29,"endTime":1811.04,"body":"that. Yeah. So they were not"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1811.04,"endTime":1814.46,"body":"understanding. Are they big"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1811.04,"endTime":1814.46,"body":"drinkers themselves? Oh, yeah."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1814.67,"endTime":1819.86,"body":"Okay. Yeah, so that's"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1814.67,"endTime":1819.86,"body":"interesting. So you beat it and"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1819.86,"endTime":1821.12,"body":"tell them like the whole story?"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1821.18,"endTime":1825.8,"body":"No, no, I did not tell"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1821.18,"endTime":1825.8,"body":"them at first cuz I didn't want"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1825.8,"endTime":1830.33,"body":"my mom to worry more. And I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1825.8,"endTime":1830.33,"body":"think that's also where like"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1830.33,"endTime":1834.83,"body":"kids get definitely, like tied"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1830.33,"endTime":1834.83,"body":"up about talking about it. Yeah,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1834.83,"endTime":1837.47,"body":"they don't, they don't really"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1834.83,"endTime":1837.47,"body":"want their parents to worry too"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1837.47,"endTime":1841.91,"body":"much. Because it's not anything"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1837.47,"endTime":1841.91,"body":"really my mom did. It's just"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1841.94,"endTime":1844.97,"body":"whatever was happening in my"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1841.94,"endTime":1844.97,"body":"brain. Right. So"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1847.01,"endTime":1851.0,"body":"the parents"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1847.01,"endTime":1851.0,"body":"mothers blamed themselves. Yeah."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1852.11,"endTime":1855.77,"body":"So I didn't want that"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1852.11,"endTime":1855.77,"body":"to happen. So it took a while"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1855.77,"endTime":1857.03,"body":"for that to come out."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1857.689,"endTime":1860.299,"body":"Isn't it such a"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1857.689,"endTime":1860.299,"body":"cruel irony that that's like,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1860.539,"endTime":1863.419,"body":"what stops you from getting the"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1860.539,"endTime":1863.419,"body":"help you need?"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1863.75,"endTime":1869.3,"body":"Yeah. I remember one of"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1863.75,"endTime":1869.3,"body":"my friends when I was growing"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1869.3,"endTime":1875.63,"body":"up. He tried cutting his wrists,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1869.3,"endTime":1875.63,"body":"but, like, cleaned up himself,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1876.11,"endTime":1879.35,"body":"and the floor because he didn't"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1876.11,"endTime":1879.35,"body":"want the blood to get"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1879.35,"endTime":1883.4,"body":"everywhere. So he didn't want it"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1879.35,"endTime":1883.4,"body":"to be dirty. So then that's how"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1883.4,"endTime":1886.43,"body":"he like saved his own life,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1883.4,"endTime":1886.43,"body":"because he didn't want to make a"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1886.43,"endTime":1892.43,"body":"mess for which is just wild."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1886.43,"endTime":1892.43,"body":"Right, right. Yeah, yeah."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1893.0,"endTime":1895.79,"body":"It's kind of like"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1893.0,"endTime":1895.79,"body":"you have rational thoughts"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1895.79,"endTime":1900.74,"body":"intruding to your irrational"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1895.79,"endTime":1900.74,"body":"thoughts? Like you're like, what"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1900.74,"endTime":1903.86,"body":"are the consequences of what I'm"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1900.74,"endTime":1903.86,"body":"doing? What's gonna happen next?"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1903.89,"endTime":1906.44,"body":"And then you have to get to"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1903.89,"endTime":1906.44,"body":"that, that mental spot and like,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1906.47,"endTime":1910.28,"body":"oh, it might not be good. Maybe"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1906.47,"endTime":1910.28,"body":"I should stop."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1910.58,"endTime":1916.64,"body":"Yeah, yeah, exactly. So"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1910.58,"endTime":1916.64,"body":"it. It's been cool. That support"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1916.64,"endTime":1919.28,"body":"system that we talked about"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1916.64,"endTime":1919.28,"body":"earlier. I mean, that's there."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1920.48,"endTime":1924.8,"body":"And I was able to go to concerts"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1920.48,"endTime":1924.8,"body":"without having to worry about"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1924.98,"endTime":1930.02,"body":"drinking or anything like that,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1924.98,"endTime":1930.02,"body":"which was nice. That's"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1930.02,"endTime":1932.21,"body":"definitely one of the things"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1930.02,"endTime":1932.21,"body":"that I was afraid of, because"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1932.21,"endTime":1935.24,"body":"that was such like a big piece"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1932.21,"endTime":1935.24,"body":"of my life. I didn't want that"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1935.24,"endTime":1939.56,"body":"to to be both me trying to get"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1935.24,"endTime":1939.56,"body":"better, and then also getting"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1939.56,"endTime":1941.33,"body":"worse at my thing that I love."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1944.0,"endTime":1947.48,"body":"So did you ever do"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1944.0,"endTime":1947.48,"body":"a TA or affordable program?"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1947.72,"endTime":1951.08,"body":"No. I thought about it."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1952.64,"endTime":1954.41,"body":"I guess I'm not"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1952.64,"endTime":1954.41,"body":"even supposed to ask you that."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1954.41,"endTime":1957.5,"body":"So I can retract the question."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1954.41,"endTime":1957.5,"body":"Oh, no. It's like not allowed to"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1957.5,"endTime":1957.95,"body":"ask."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1958.52,"endTime":1964.64,"body":"Oh, well, the answer is"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1958.52,"endTime":1964.64,"body":"no. So but it all kind of goes"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1964.64,"endTime":1968.36,"body":"with not being religious and"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1964.64,"endTime":1968.36,"body":"knowing"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1968.39,"endTime":1971.03,"body":"it's a very"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1968.39,"endTime":1971.03,"body":"religious program. Yeah, just"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1971.03,"endTime":1971.51,"body":"weird."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1971.57,"endTime":1976.13,"body":"Yeah. It's very steeped"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1971.57,"endTime":1976.13,"body":"into Christian forgiveness, and,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1976.16,"endTime":1980.72,"body":"you know, acceptance and giving"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1976.16,"endTime":1980.72,"body":"it up to a higher power. And I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1980.72,"endTime":1984.08,"body":"looked at that stuff, and I was"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1980.72,"endTime":1984.08,"body":"just like, this is not gonna be"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1984.11,"endTime":1987.17,"body":"it for me, like, not nothing of"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1984.11,"endTime":1987.17,"body":"this is gonna jive. I'm gonna"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1987.17,"endTime":1991.67,"body":"just try to kind of keep it"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1987.17,"endTime":1991.67,"body":"going. But myself. So did you do"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1992.0,"endTime":1994.85,"body":"the whole sobriety"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1992.0,"endTime":1994.85,"body":"journey alone? You didn't join,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1994.85,"endTime":1997.94,"body":"like a group or like a forum or"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":1994.85,"endTime":1997.94,"body":"something?"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1997.97,"endTime":2001.66,"body":"Yeah, no, I did it"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1997.97,"endTime":2001.66,"body":"myself. I guess. That's got"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2001.66,"endTime":2002.74,"body":"to be incredibly"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2001.66,"endTime":2002.74,"body":"hard."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2003.4,"endTime":2007.51,"body":"I guess. So. I think, I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2003.4,"endTime":2007.51,"body":"think to me, it doesn't seem"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2007.51,"endTime":2010.93,"body":"like that big of a deal. Mostly"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2007.51,"endTime":2010.93,"body":"because like I had friends,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2010.93,"endTime":2017.05,"body":"sure. But also like, I didn't"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2010.93,"endTime":2017.05,"body":"want to die. So it's just like,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2017.08,"endTime":2020.32,"body":"Oh, this is a thing that I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2017.08,"endTime":2020.32,"body":"shouldn't do anymore. And let's"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2020.32,"endTime":2023.53,"body":"not do this anymore. Because it"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2020.32,"endTime":2023.53,"body":"was just negatively affecting"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2023.53,"endTime":2027.04,"body":"everything that I was doing. And"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2023.53,"endTime":2027.04,"body":"it's, it's still funny to me,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2027.04,"endTime":2033.4,"body":"because like, my early 20s, it"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2027.04,"endTime":2033.4,"body":"was all based around alcohol and"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2033.4,"endTime":2037.57,"body":"liquor and wine where I even"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2033.4,"endTime":2037.57,"body":"sold it as distributor for a"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2037.57,"endTime":2042.46,"body":"while. And now it's like a whole"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2037.57,"endTime":2042.46,"body":"other life that I have now. And"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2042.46,"endTime":2045.25,"body":"once I got because I use the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2042.46,"endTime":2045.25,"body":"tracker, I use the sobriety"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2045.25,"endTime":2048.64,"body":"tracker for a little bit. And I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2045.25,"endTime":2048.64,"body":"think once I got to, like 30"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2048.64,"endTime":2050.65,"body":"days was just like, I think I'm"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2048.64,"endTime":2050.65,"body":"all right now."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2051.01,"endTime":2053.77,"body":"Wow. 30 days, it's"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2051.01,"endTime":2053.77,"body":"like the beginning."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2054.1,"endTime":2058.06,"body":"Yeah, that's what I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2054.1,"endTime":2058.06,"body":"thought. But like, I had gone to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2058.06,"endTime":2060.76,"body":"a show and everybody was really"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2058.06,"endTime":2060.76,"body":"cool. They were asking if I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2060.76,"endTime":2063.64,"body":"wanted to water or a ginger ale"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2060.76,"endTime":2063.64,"body":"or something instead, and they"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2063.64,"endTime":2067.9,"body":"were all super respectful. And I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2063.64,"endTime":2067.9,"body":"think that's just something that"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2067.9,"endTime":2069.13,"body":"that really helped me out."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2070.24,"endTime":2072.61,"body":"That's cool. Yeah."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2070.24,"endTime":2072.61,"body":"People who are not saying, Oh,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2072.64,"endTime":2074.26,"body":"fuck that. We're gonna go to the"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2072.64,"endTime":2074.26,"body":"bar."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2075.1,"endTime":2077.74,"body":"Yeah, exactly. Exactly."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2075.1,"endTime":2077.74,"body":"So"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2077.83,"endTime":2080.32,"body":"no, no offense to"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2077.83,"endTime":2080.32,"body":"your parents, like it's not the"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2080.32,"endTime":2080.95,"body":"most helpful."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2085.03,"endTime":2087.94,"body":"offenses, fine, they're"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2085.03,"endTime":2087.94,"body":"fine. They're good people, but"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2089.38,"endTime":2090.94,"body":"they should not be drinking that"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2089.38,"endTime":2090.94,"body":"much."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2091.209,"endTime":2093.129,"body":"But you're able to"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2091.209,"endTime":2093.129,"body":"tell your friends honestly,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2093.129,"endTime":2095.559,"body":"like, Hey, this is not who I am"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2093.129,"endTime":2095.559,"body":"anymore."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2095.769,"endTime":2098.109,"body":"Yeah, it was that was"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2095.769,"endTime":2098.109,"body":"really nice. And just the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2098.109,"endTime":2101.529,"body":"support system of it was really"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2098.109,"endTime":2101.529,"body":"nice. And it just made things"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2101.529,"endTime":2105.549,"body":"easier. So every like everybody"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2101.529,"endTime":2105.549,"body":"that I've talked to about this,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2105.549,"endTime":2108.129,"body":"they're just like, Oh, that's so"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2105.549,"endTime":2108.129,"body":"amazing. You did so much on your"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2108.129,"endTime":2109.839,"body":"own, and I don't feel like I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2108.129,"endTime":2109.839,"body":"did."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2111.07,"endTime":2113.56,"body":"He's definitely"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2111.07,"endTime":2113.56,"body":"dead. It's not easy to be sober."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2113.56,"endTime":2119.8,"body":"And it's not easy to recognize a"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2113.56,"endTime":2119.8,"body":"breaking point like that. So"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2119.8,"endTime":2122.08,"body":"yeah, I would be proud. I would"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2119.8,"endTime":2122.08,"body":"pick a time of year you"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2122.08,"endTime":2124.06,"body":"celebrate your sober versary?"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2124.99,"endTime":2128.26,"body":"I gotta figure it out,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2124.99,"endTime":2128.26,"body":"because I don't remember. Cuz I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2128.26,"endTime":2133.81,"body":"deleted the app and all that. So"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2128.26,"endTime":2133.81,"body":"I don't remember. When I did. I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2133.81,"endTime":2136.78,"body":"think it was sometime maybe in"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2133.81,"endTime":2136.78,"body":"March, we'll find out. I don't"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2136.78,"endTime":2138.85,"body":"know, I'll look, I'll get a"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2136.78,"endTime":2138.85,"body":"date."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2139.389,"endTime":2141.369,"body":"I guess it's hard"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2139.389,"endTime":2141.369,"body":"to pinpoint, like an exact date,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2141.369,"endTime":2145.719,"body":"but you could just do time of"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2141.369,"endTime":2145.719,"body":"year. I like that. I like that."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2145.929,"endTime":2149.289,"body":"I know my boyfriend. I think"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2145.929,"endTime":2149.289,"body":"he's hidden in five years in"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2149.289,"endTime":2152.379,"body":"November. But he's like, also"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2149.289,"endTime":2152.379,"body":"questionable on the date. He's"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2152.379,"endTime":2155.859,"body":"like, it's in November. Bla bla"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2152.379,"endTime":2155.859,"body":"bla, like, he knows he tried to"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2155.859,"endTime":2158.409,"body":"be sober twice, and it didn't"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2155.859,"endTime":2158.409,"body":"work. And the third time it"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2158.409,"endTime":2161.409,"body":"stuck. So his his details are so"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2158.409,"endTime":2161.409,"body":"fuzzy."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2162.16,"endTime":2164.26,"body":"I think you just forget"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2162.16,"endTime":2164.26,"body":"about it. Like it's not part of"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2164.26,"endTime":2170.02,"body":"your life anymore. But I have"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2164.26,"endTime":2170.02,"body":"seen because we like we have a"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2170.35,"endTime":2174.19,"body":"big heroin epidemic here. And"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2170.35,"endTime":2174.19,"body":"like, fentanyl and stuff. So"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2174.19,"endTime":2179.47,"body":"I've seen a couple my friends"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2174.19,"endTime":2179.47,"body":"recover from that. And it was"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2179.47,"endTime":2183.58,"body":"just like, they had to have that"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2179.47,"endTime":2183.58,"body":"date in there. Yeah, to keep"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2183.58,"endTime":2186.79,"body":"going. Like, they know that it's"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2183.58,"endTime":2186.79,"body":"been this amount of days."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2187.33,"endTime":2192.01,"body":"sensitive and clean or whatever,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2187.33,"endTime":2192.01,"body":"right. So I think for me, it's"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2192.01,"endTime":2195.76,"body":"just, like, just came to be part"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2192.01,"endTime":2195.76,"body":"of my life. Like, that's just"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2195.76,"endTime":2199.66,"body":"not something that I do anymore."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2195.76,"endTime":2199.66,"body":"For them, like that's a goal for"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2199.66,"endTime":2203.44,"body":"them. And so just like not go"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2199.66,"endTime":2203.44,"body":"back to that life at all."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2203.92,"endTime":2206.68,"body":"Yeah, everyone has"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2203.92,"endTime":2206.68,"body":"a different process for it."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2206.71,"endTime":2210.19,"body":"Yeah. That's like scary shit"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2206.71,"endTime":2210.19,"body":"setting all and"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2210.76,"endTime":2214.66,"body":"opiates. It's not good."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2210.76,"endTime":2214.66,"body":"Not good for anybody. Yeah, it's"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2214.66,"endTime":2218.11,"body":"been like I see"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2214.66,"endTime":2218.11,"body":"stories in the comedy community"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2218.11,"endTime":2222.34,"body":"and out here in LA a handful of"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2218.11,"endTime":2222.34,"body":"people just died from fentanyl"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2222.34,"endTime":2226.21,"body":"and cocaine. It's like, you"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2222.34,"endTime":2226.21,"body":"gotta gotta be aware of"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2226.6,"endTime":2228.1,"body":"everything you're putting into"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2226.6,"endTime":2228.1,"body":"your body."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2228.34,"endTime":2233.29,"body":"Yeah, I just heard I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2228.34,"endTime":2233.29,"body":"just heard a story about I don't"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2233.29,"endTime":2236.98,"body":"remember her name. But there is"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2233.29,"endTime":2236.98,"body":"that a story about a couple"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2236.98,"endTime":2240.43,"body":"stand ups that did cocaine and"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2236.98,"endTime":2240.43,"body":"it was laced with fentanyl or"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2240.46,"endTime":2243.31,"body":"they found out and then one of"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2240.46,"endTime":2243.31,"body":"them died, I think."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2244.09,"endTime":2247.69,"body":"Yeah, it was a few"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2244.09,"endTime":2247.69,"body":"maybe a week ago, one or two"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2247.69,"endTime":2253.6,"body":"weeks ago, a few comics died."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2247.69,"endTime":2253.6,"body":"Kate Quigley? I think she"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2253.6,"endTime":2256.48,"body":"survived. But like a bunch of"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2253.6,"endTime":2256.48,"body":"three people died, which is"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2256.48,"endTime":2256.81,"body":"scary."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2257.38,"endTime":2261.13,"body":"Yeah. It's, it's"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2257.38,"endTime":2261.13,"body":"insane. One of my friends just"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2261.13,"endTime":2264.67,"body":"moved from California over here."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2261.13,"endTime":2264.67,"body":"And she was talking about how"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2264.67,"endTime":2270.1,"body":"she used to do coke. But as soon"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2264.67,"endTime":2270.1,"body":"as it was just like, betting all"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2270.1,"endTime":2273.79,"body":"lacing, you couldn't trust"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2270.1,"endTime":2273.79,"body":"anybody anymore. So there was no"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2273.79,"endTime":2277.54,"body":"reason to do any of it. And you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2273.79,"endTime":2277.54,"body":"just quit. Because Yeah, again,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2277.54,"endTime":2278.38,"body":"you don't want to die."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2278.68,"endTime":2281.05,"body":"I mean, you can"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2278.68,"endTime":2281.05,"body":"get a test kit. But like, I"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2281.05,"endTime":2283.99,"body":"don't know if that's 100%"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2281.05,"endTime":2283.99,"body":"accurate. And to me, it seems"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2283.99,"endTime":2288.25,"body":"better just not to coke. For me,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2283.99,"endTime":2288.25,"body":"I'm like, maybe just don't do"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2288.25,"endTime":2290.53,"body":"the drugs until you know they're"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2288.25,"endTime":2290.53,"body":"safe."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2292.18,"endTime":2293.47,"body":"Or make them your own"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2292.18,"endTime":2293.47,"body":"right."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2294.19,"endTime":2295.54,"body":"That's a personal"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2294.19,"endTime":2295.54,"body":"philosophy."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2296.02,"endTime":2298.45,"body":"Yeah, you got Yeah,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2296.02,"endTime":2298.45,"body":"chemicals in your house? You're"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2298.45,"endTime":2299.2,"body":"gonna figure it out?"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2299.74,"endTime":2302.14,"body":"Yeah, I don't"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2299.74,"endTime":2302.14,"body":"know. Like, or maybe make soap."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2302.17,"endTime":2308.44,"body":"Maybe try it try a different"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2302.17,"endTime":2308.44,"body":"hobby. But to me, death is a big"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2308.44,"endTime":2311.32,"body":"factor where it's like, I also"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2308.44,"endTime":2311.32,"body":"don't want to die. Therefore, I"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2311.32,"endTime":2314.86,"body":"will not choose activities that"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2311.32,"endTime":2314.86,"body":"increase my likelihood of dying."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2315.58,"endTime":2319.18,"body":"Yeah. Yeah. Are you alright? Go"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2315.58,"endTime":2319.18,"body":"ahead."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2319.54,"endTime":2322.39,"body":"Well, it was just"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2319.54,"endTime":2322.39,"body":"always a weird thing to me to,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2322.69,"endTime":2326.53,"body":"with. Ever since like, I was"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2322.69,"endTime":2326.53,"body":"young. I always thought suicide"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2326.53,"endTime":2333.25,"body":"was something that was not"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2326.53,"endTime":2333.25,"body":"necessarily negative, but just"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2333.25,"endTime":2338.86,"body":"like a not a good way to go out."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2333.25,"endTime":2338.86,"body":"You could probably do more like"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2338.86,"endTime":2344.47,"body":"you don't have to, but grow"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2338.86,"endTime":2344.47,"body":"growing up, you know, you you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2344.5,"endTime":2347.05,"body":"understand that it's not really"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2344.5,"endTime":2347.05,"body":"like them killing themselves,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2347.05,"endTime":2351.22,"body":"like they died by suicide or, or"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2347.05,"endTime":2351.22,"body":"something along those lines,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2351.22,"endTime":2356.32,"body":"where it's not really in their"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2351.22,"endTime":2356.32,"body":"control. And when when what"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2356.32,"endTime":2358.96,"body":"happened to me happened, I was"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2356.32,"endTime":2358.96,"body":"just like, I'm not in control."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2359.29,"endTime":2364.57,"body":"And it's not, you know, it's not"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2359.29,"endTime":2364.57,"body":"the stories that you hear about"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2364.72,"endTime":2367.45,"body":"people just Oh, dang. Like,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2364.72,"endTime":2367.45,"body":"there's more stuff that"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2367.45,"endTime":2369.97,"body":"happened. There's there's more"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2367.45,"endTime":2369.97,"body":"mental stuff that happened in"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2369.97,"endTime":2374.59,"body":"there. And that just made a just"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2369.97,"endTime":2374.59,"body":"a brighter spot for me that, you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2374.59,"endTime":2378.79,"body":"know, it's it's, it's not a bad"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2374.59,"endTime":2378.79,"body":"thing or a good thing. It's just"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2378.79,"endTime":2383.89,"body":"a way that people go out and it"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2378.79,"endTime":2383.89,"body":"can be, you know, curved it can"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2383.89,"endTime":2386.65,"body":"be helped. If they have help."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2387.49,"endTime":2390.07,"body":"So when you say"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2387.49,"endTime":2390.07,"body":"you could do more You mean like"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2390.07,"endTime":2393.7,"body":"in your life you could have"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2390.07,"endTime":2393.7,"body":"Yeah, kept going. Yeah, yeah."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2394.03,"endTime":2397.81,"body":"Yeah, I've always I know, the"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2394.03,"endTime":2397.81,"body":"moment I learned what suicide"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2397.81,"endTime":2401.05,"body":"was when I was a kid because it"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2397.81,"endTime":2401.05,"body":"was on the News like a murder"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2401.05,"endTime":2404.23,"body":"suicide. And I remember I"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2401.05,"endTime":2404.23,"body":"probably asked my dad like, what"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2404.26,"endTime":2406.63,"body":"was it mean? He killed his"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2404.26,"endTime":2406.63,"body":"family and then he killed"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2406.63,"endTime":2409.3,"body":"himself. I already kill himself"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2406.63,"endTime":2409.3,"body":"and I was so confused. Like,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2409.3,"endTime":2412.27,"body":"then you lose, you know, he"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2409.3,"endTime":2412.27,"body":"could have he could have run"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2412.27,"endTime":2415.42,"body":"away. If you're going to kill"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2412.27,"endTime":2415.42,"body":"people run away otherwise you go"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2415.42,"endTime":2419.14,"body":"to jail, right? That was my like"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2415.42,"endTime":2419.14,"body":"child thinking. But suicide"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2419.14,"endTime":2422.98,"body":"dangerous child, I feel"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2419.14,"endTime":2422.98,"body":"like you're up to no good. Yeah,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2423.04,"endTime":2426.94,"body":"fearless. But to"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2423.04,"endTime":2426.94,"body":"kill yourself just seemed like"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2426.94,"endTime":2429.7,"body":"losing like you and your own"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2426.94,"endTime":2429.7,"body":"game?"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2430.18,"endTime":2434.74,"body":"Yeah, yeah, that's a"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2430.18,"endTime":2434.74,"body":"good way to kind of put it. But"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2436.03,"endTime":2440.71,"body":"then you learned that there's a"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2436.03,"endTime":2440.71,"body":"lot more to it. It makes you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2440.71,"endTime":2444.43,"body":"really put in perspective of the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2440.71,"endTime":2444.43,"body":"things that that people have"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2444.43,"endTime":2448.3,"body":"lost and how it affected them."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2444.43,"endTime":2448.3,"body":"And, you know, the I've I've"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2448.3,"endTime":2453.07,"body":"lost like four friends to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2448.3,"endTime":2453.07,"body":"suicide. And it's, yeah, it's"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2453.58,"endTime":2458.92,"body":"mostly with drugs and stuff to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2453.58,"endTime":2458.92,"body":"like, that they try to self"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2458.92,"endTime":2461.02,"body":"prescribe for the most part,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2458.92,"endTime":2461.02,"body":"right? That's, that's what you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2461.02,"endTime":2465.34,"body":"do. You try to self treat,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2461.02,"endTime":2465.34,"body":"instead of going to therapy, and"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2465.34,"endTime":2469.51,"body":"maybe like getting other things"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2465.34,"endTime":2469.51,"body":"that will make you feel like a"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2469.51,"endTime":2472.45,"body":"zombie sometimes, maybe, but"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2469.51,"endTime":2472.45,"body":"like, you're still around, and"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2472.45,"endTime":2473.44,"body":"you're still mostly you?"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2474.34,"endTime":2476.68,"body":"Yeah, like you"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2474.34,"endTime":2476.68,"body":"have to have that awareness of"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2476.86,"endTime":2479.98,"body":"what's actually helping me"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2476.86,"endTime":2479.98,"body":"what's actually hurting me. You"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2479.98,"endTime":2484.39,"body":"have to care about getting"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2479.98,"endTime":2484.39,"body":"better? For sure, for sure. And"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2484.42,"endTime":2486.61,"body":"for some people, I guess it's"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2484.42,"endTime":2486.61,"body":"like, either too much of the"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2486.61,"endTime":2490.84,"body":"time, or they don't. They don't"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2486.61,"endTime":2490.84,"body":"want to make those introspective"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2490.96,"endTime":2491.77,"body":"questions,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2492.1,"endTime":2497.44,"body":"I think, yeah. And I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2492.1,"endTime":2497.44,"body":"think that feeling of not being"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2497.44,"endTime":2502.06,"body":"good enough to really like do"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2497.44,"endTime":2502.06,"body":"anything also seeps into you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2502.06,"endTime":2504.82,"body":"like not wanting to ask for"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2502.06,"endTime":2504.82,"body":"help, too, because you're just,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2505.18,"endTime":2508.66,"body":"I'm a nuisance, I'm a bother,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2505.18,"endTime":2508.66,"body":"like, I'm just another weight on"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2508.66,"endTime":2511.84,"body":"someone's shoulders. So that"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2508.66,"endTime":2511.84,"body":"that's another piece of it, that"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2511.93,"endTime":2515.17,"body":"will probably stop people from"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2511.93,"endTime":2515.17,"body":"from trying to find the help"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2515.17,"endTime":2515.68,"body":"that they need."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2516.25,"endTime":2520.51,"body":"Yeah, but then, if"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2516.25,"endTime":2520.51,"body":"you think about the world's"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2520.51,"endTime":2523.75,"body":"like, everyone's a nuisance,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2520.51,"endTime":2523.75,"body":"everyone's so annoying. You"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2523.75,"endTime":2528.94,"body":"might as well also be annoying."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2523.75,"endTime":2528.94,"body":"Like, take up your space and ask"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2528.94,"endTime":2531.7,"body":"for help. And you know, do what"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2528.94,"endTime":2531.7,"body":"you need to do to be a real"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2531.73,"endTime":2532.57,"body":"healthy person."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2533.2,"endTime":2536.32,"body":"Yeah, I'm finding that"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2533.2,"endTime":2536.32,"body":"out more and more that I have to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2536.32,"endTime":2540.97,"body":"actually like, be out in the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2536.32,"endTime":2540.97,"body":"open and get my face out there a"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2540.97,"endTime":2544.42,"body":"little bit more. Because it's"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2540.97,"endTime":2544.42,"body":"something that I I'm very much a"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2544.42,"endTime":2548.95,"body":"big recluse and not recluse, but"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2544.42,"endTime":2548.95,"body":"like, very much, I don't want to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2548.95,"endTime":2552.1,"body":"be the center of attention ever."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2548.95,"endTime":2552.1,"body":"I don't want to be a squeaky"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2552.1,"endTime":2555.1,"body":"wheel. Like I just kind of want"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2552.1,"endTime":2555.1,"body":"to like, do my job well, and"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2555.1,"endTime":2560.59,"body":"keep going. And the flip side of"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2555.1,"endTime":2560.59,"body":"that is my whole one of the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2560.59,"endTime":2564.13,"body":"ideas of the of my podcasts that"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2560.59,"endTime":2564.13,"body":"I do. By being the center of"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2564.13,"endTime":2567.13,"body":"attention is doing a spotlight"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2564.13,"endTime":2567.13,"body":"on other people that are around"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2567.13,"endTime":2572.59,"body":"me. I support other people, and"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2567.13,"endTime":2572.59,"body":"like I get all the things out."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2572.59,"endTime":2575.83,"body":"But when it comes to anything by"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2572.59,"endTime":2575.83,"body":"itself, I'm just so like, no one"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2575.83,"endTime":2577.12,"body":"wants to hear from me ever."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2579.19,"endTime":2580.81,"body":"Yeah, it sounds"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2579.19,"endTime":2580.81,"body":"like you still need to work on"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2580.81,"endTime":2587.2,"body":"the self talk. Yeah, yeah. But I"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2580.81,"endTime":2587.2,"body":"feel you because I think suicide"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2587.2,"endTime":2590.89,"body":"is such a big problem. Like I've"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2587.2,"endTime":2590.89,"body":"definitely, you know, entertain"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2590.89,"endTime":2594.46,"body":"suicidal thoughts. I've been"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2590.89,"endTime":2594.46,"body":"depressed on and off forever."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2594.64,"endTime":2597.82,"body":"I'm still need to really like"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2594.64,"endTime":2597.82,"body":"address that. But you know, it's"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2597.82,"endTime":2601.21,"body":"small steps. One, and I think I"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2597.82,"endTime":2601.21,"body":"think a lot of it is like, you"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2601.21,"endTime":2604.27,"body":"have to say to yourself, I"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2601.21,"endTime":2604.27,"body":"deserve help. I deserve to be"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2604.27,"endTime":2607.57,"body":"the best person I can be. Fuck"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2604.27,"endTime":2607.57,"body":"everybody else. They come"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2607.57,"endTime":2611.47,"body":"second, like you have to take"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2607.57,"endTime":2611.47,"body":"charge of you and fix you."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2611.86,"endTime":2617.62,"body":"Yeah, yeah, for sure."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2611.86,"endTime":2617.62,"body":"And it's a lot to convince"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2617.62,"endTime":2620.14,"body":"yourself that you're kind of"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2617.62,"endTime":2620.14,"body":"worth it and convince yourself"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2620.14,"endTime":2624.55,"body":"to take that step. But once you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2620.14,"endTime":2624.55,"body":"do, like, it's a whole different"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2624.55,"endTime":2627.97,"body":"world, because then you realize"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2624.55,"endTime":2627.97,"body":"that some people around you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2628.0,"endTime":2632.17,"body":"suck, but most. And they're"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2628.0,"endTime":2632.17,"body":"always willing to, like, help"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2632.17,"endTime":2635.71,"body":"you out and be there if you just"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2632.17,"endTime":2635.71,"body":"say something."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2636.34,"endTime":2638.83,"body":"Yeah, and I think"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2636.34,"endTime":2638.83,"body":"a lot of it is dropping those"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2638.83,"endTime":2642.25,"body":"people who suck and connecting"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2638.83,"endTime":2642.25,"body":"with the ones who are great."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2643.0,"endTime":2646.42,"body":"For sure. There's so"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2643.0,"endTime":2646.42,"body":"many people that suck but yeah."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2648.28,"endTime":2650.08,"body":"Like whether"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2648.28,"endTime":2650.08,"body":"they're your friends, stop"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2650.08,"endTime":2653.98,"body":"texting them, if they're on your"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2650.08,"endTime":2653.98,"body":"Instagram feed, unfollow them,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2653.98,"endTime":2656.08,"body":"like get rid of the people that"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2653.98,"endTime":2656.08,"body":"bring you down."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2656.53,"endTime":2661.42,"body":"Yeah, yeah. And that"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2656.53,"endTime":2661.42,"body":"the social media of it all is is"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2661.42,"endTime":2664.69,"body":"a whole other thing. Because one"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2661.42,"endTime":2664.69,"body":"of the one of the first things"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2664.69,"endTime":2670.75,"body":"that I did, the beginning of"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2664.69,"endTime":2670.75,"body":"this year was removed Facebook"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2670.75,"endTime":2675.7,"body":"and all that stuff and try to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2670.75,"endTime":2675.7,"body":"like people say, social media"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2675.7,"endTime":2679.18,"body":"detox or something like that,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2675.7,"endTime":2679.18,"body":"but I just handle anymore. Like"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2679.18,"endTime":2681.25,"body":"it was just too much. There was"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2679.18,"endTime":2681.25,"body":"Yeah,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2681.28,"endTime":2684.28,"body":"it's really bad"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2681.28,"endTime":2684.28,"body":"for you unless you can. I don't"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2684.28,"endTime":2686.44,"body":"know if you can find a formula"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2684.28,"endTime":2686.44,"body":"to only use it for like the"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2686.44,"endTime":2689.02,"body":"perfect amount of time, but"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2686.44,"endTime":2689.02,"body":"unless you can really moderate"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2689.02,"endTime":2690.31,"body":"it. It's terrible for you."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2690.49,"endTime":2694.24,"body":"Yeah. And we're both in"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2690.49,"endTime":2694.24,"body":"spaces that require social media"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2694.24,"endTime":2697.03,"body":"to kind of like keep going and"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2697.15,"endTime":2699.34,"body":"where your whole"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2697.15,"endTime":2699.34,"body":"like entertainment worth is"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2699.34,"endTime":2701.17,"body":"based on your social media."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2701.56,"endTime":2704.5,"body":"Yeah, it's not a it's"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2701.56,"endTime":2704.5,"body":"not a great feeling. And I'm"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2704.5,"endTime":2708.25,"body":"also real bad at it. So that's"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2704.5,"endTime":2708.25,"body":"that's another part of it. But"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2708.67,"endTime":2711.46,"body":"I would say that's"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2708.67,"endTime":2711.46,"body":"a positive trait to be bad at"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2711.46,"endTime":2712.18,"body":"social media."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2713.5,"endTime":2719.11,"body":"Good. I hope so. I can"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2713.5,"endTime":2719.11,"body":"I can lurk real well, I can. I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2719.11,"endTime":2723.07,"body":"can, like, watch other people"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2719.11,"endTime":2723.07,"body":"and read it. I can. I can go up"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2723.07,"endTime":2725.44,"body":"and down that all day, but I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2723.07,"endTime":2725.44,"body":"cannot participate."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2725.77,"endTime":2728.14,"body":"Yeah, read it"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2725.77,"endTime":2728.14,"body":"read. It's fascinating. I just"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2728.14,"endTime":2731.23,"body":"go on it every once in a while"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2728.14,"endTime":2731.23,"body":"like to look for podcast guests"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2731.23,"endTime":2733.96,"body":"or read up on one thing, but"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2731.23,"endTime":2733.96,"body":"whenever I'm there, I'm like,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2733.96,"endTime":2736.87,"body":"this is like that what the"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2733.96,"endTime":2736.87,"body":"internet should be. This is like"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2736.87,"endTime":2741.19,"body":"novels and deep questions, you"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2736.87,"endTime":2741.19,"body":"get really into people's lives."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2741.25,"endTime":2744.25,"body":"There's, there's so"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2741.25,"endTime":2744.25,"body":"much that happens. There's"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2744.25,"endTime":2748.0,"body":"always a new subreddit to go to."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2744.25,"endTime":2748.0,"body":"And you're always discovering"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2748.0,"endTime":2751.66,"body":"something else. And it's just"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2748.0,"endTime":2751.66,"body":"it's wild. Like that's, it feels"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2751.66,"endTime":2755.08,"body":"a little bit more like a better"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2751.66,"endTime":2755.08,"body":"community to be a part of, but"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2755.32,"endTime":2757.87,"body":"they're also like, terrible,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2755.32,"endTime":2757.87,"body":"terrible people in that."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2758.47,"endTime":2761.62,"body":"Yeah, I think it's"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2758.47,"endTime":2761.62,"body":"also a little dangerous in the"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2761.62,"endTime":2765.16,"body":"way where it's like, too, it's"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2761.62,"endTime":2765.16,"body":"too fulfilling. It might keep"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2765.16,"endTime":2767.29,"body":"you online too long. You know?"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2765.16,"endTime":2767.29,"body":"Yes,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2767.32,"endTime":2771.79,"body":"yes. That's trying to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2767.32,"endTime":2771.79,"body":"go to sleep with your phone in"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2771.79,"endTime":2773.59,"body":"your hand is not conducive to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2771.79,"endTime":2773.59,"body":"sleep."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2773.98,"endTime":2776.29,"body":"Yeah. Which might"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2773.98,"endTime":2776.29,"body":"be fine when we're in a"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2776.29,"endTime":2780.28,"body":"pandemic, but when we're out of"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2776.29,"endTime":2780.28,"body":"it should go out into the world."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2780.4,"endTime":2782.83,"body":"If that happens. Yeah."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2780.4,"endTime":2782.83,"body":"If we're ever out of it. Yeah."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2783.28,"endTime":2787.99,"body":"Sometime sometime"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2783.28,"endTime":2787.99,"body":"in the future. All right. Do you"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2787.99,"endTime":2789.25,"body":"want to spend the roulette"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2787.99,"endTime":2789.25,"body":"wheel?"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2789.4,"endTime":2793.24,"body":"Yeah, for sure. This is"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2789.4,"endTime":2793.24,"body":"a good idea. I like this idea."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2793.24,"endTime":2793.48,"body":"Thank"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2793.48,"endTime":2795.34,"body":"you. I think it's"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2793.48,"endTime":2795.34,"body":"so silly, but people seem to"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2795.34,"endTime":2798.1,"body":"like it. Okay."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2803.5,"endTime":2808.03,"body":"Do you have a memory you want to"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2803.5,"endTime":2808.03,"body":"share from childhood? It could"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2808.03,"endTime":2812.44,"body":"be like a really good one, or"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2808.03,"endTime":2812.44,"body":"really, whatever one bad May,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2812.74,"endTime":2816.7,"body":"because it's got to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2812.74,"endTime":2816.7,"body":"happen. This came back to me"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2816.73,"endTime":2822.67,"body":"recently. So when I was a kid,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2816.73,"endTime":2822.67,"body":"we would swordfight with tree"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2822.67,"endTime":2828.04,"body":"sticks. And we would test out"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2822.67,"endTime":2828.04,"body":"their might by just slaving"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2828.04,"endTime":2832.54,"body":"against a tree and hoping that"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2828.04,"endTime":2832.54,"body":"they don't break. And I think I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2832.54,"endTime":2836.8,"body":"was like, 11 when this happened."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2832.54,"endTime":2836.8,"body":"And then I broke one right on"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2836.8,"endTime":2840.46,"body":"the tree and then just smacked"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2836.8,"endTime":2840.46,"body":"me in the mouth and broke my"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2840.46,"endTime":2847.15,"body":"tooth. And recently, I had just"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2840.46,"endTime":2847.15,"body":"ate breakfast and got the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2847.15,"endTime":2852.19,"body":"filling just came right out. 20"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2847.15,"endTime":2852.19,"body":"years later, so I recently got"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2852.19,"endTime":2858.49,"body":"that fixed. Oh, wow. Yeah. So I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2852.19,"endTime":2858.49,"body":"just remember. I remember"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2858.49,"endTime":2863.53,"body":"getting smacked in the mouth"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2858.49,"endTime":2863.53,"body":"with with the stick, bleeding"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2863.53,"endTime":2866.5,"body":"everywhere and then walking home"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2863.53,"endTime":2866.5,"body":"with my tooth in my hand."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2867.07,"endTime":2870.94,"body":"Because we were down the street,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2867.07,"endTime":2870.94,"body":"like, very much not near the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2870.94,"endTime":2876.49,"body":"house. And I go I go there and"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2870.94,"endTime":2876.49,"body":"then she calls the dentist."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2876.49,"endTime":2880.9,"body":"We're in there within like an"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2876.49,"endTime":2880.9,"body":"hour. That is not my experience"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2880.9,"endTime":2883.45,"body":"as an adult now, so I don't know"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2880.9,"endTime":2883.45,"body":"how she worked it."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2884.77,"endTime":2886.87,"body":"Emergency. Right."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2887.53,"endTime":2889.54,"body":"She thought there was"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2887.53,"endTime":2889.54,"body":"more than what it was probably I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2889.54,"endTime":2893.74,"body":"don't know. I mean, your"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2889.54,"endTime":2893.74,"body":"emergency."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2894.01,"endTime":2896.26,"body":"Yeah, you hit yourself with a"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2894.01,"endTime":2896.26,"body":"stick. That's that's dumb. Just"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2896.26,"endTime":2902.32,"body":"keep going. So yeah, so I just"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2896.26,"endTime":2902.32,"body":"remember like, getting that"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2902.74,"endTime":2907.63,"body":"being rushed to the dentist. And"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2902.74,"endTime":2907.63,"body":"then like I said, like, three"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2907.63,"endTime":2911.83,"body":"weeks ago, is when the feeling"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2907.63,"endTime":2911.83,"body":"finally came out. And it just"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2911.83,"endTime":2914.11,"body":"dropped out of my mouth while I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2911.83,"endTime":2914.11,"body":"was eating a breakfast sandwich."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2914.11,"endTime":2917.11,"body":"And then I almost choked on it."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2914.11,"endTime":2917.11,"body":"So that was my time."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2918.07,"endTime":2920.02,"body":"I think you've got"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2918.07,"endTime":2920.02,"body":"to watch out for the universe."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2920.02,"endTime":2922.21,"body":"Like it's kind of out to get you"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2920.02,"endTime":2922.21,"body":"a little bit."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2922.33,"endTime":2923.44,"body":"Yeah, doesn't like me."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2922.33,"endTime":2923.44,"body":"But"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2925.6,"endTime":2928.51,"body":"if you got to go"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2925.6,"endTime":2928.51,"body":"plants a tree make up for this"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2928.54,"endTime":2929.62,"body":"big tree."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2929.92,"endTime":2933.04,"body":"I had there's there's"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2929.92,"endTime":2933.04,"body":"like, trees around me already."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2933.04,"endTime":2933.22,"body":"It's"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2934.99,"endTime":2937.06,"body":"I don't know, I"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2934.99,"endTime":2937.06,"body":"don't like the karma that's"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2937.06,"endTime":2938.8,"body":"happening in these stories."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2940.06,"endTime":2941.5,"body":"They're not great"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2940.06,"endTime":2941.5,"body":"stories. They're not great."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2942.46,"endTime":2945.76,"body":"How old are you"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2942.46,"endTime":2945.76,"body":"when this happened? I want"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2945.76,"endTime":2950.89,"body":"to I want to say I was"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2945.76,"endTime":2950.89,"body":"like 10 or 11. So it's still"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2950.89,"endTime":2954.01,"body":"like I'm thinking about it now."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2950.89,"endTime":2954.01,"body":"Like I still remember a lot of"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2954.01,"endTime":2957.43,"body":"the details of it. And it's just"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2954.01,"endTime":2957.43,"body":"insane. Like what you remember"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2957.43,"endTime":2960.85,"body":"cuz I don't remember like what I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2957.43,"endTime":2960.85,"body":"did a week ago. But I remember"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2960.85,"endTime":2966.25,"body":"what happened to me 20 almost 22"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2960.85,"endTime":2966.25,"body":"years ago. Yeah, great detail."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2966.25,"endTime":2973.57,"body":"So I remember feeling and"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2966.25,"endTime":2973.57,"body":"tasting warm. Because just the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2973.57,"endTime":2977.77,"body":"blood all over my mouth at that"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2973.57,"endTime":2977.77,"body":"point. And then looking down at"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2977.77,"endTime":2981.61,"body":"my hand where the blood was on"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2977.77,"endTime":2981.61,"body":"there because I obviously use it"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2981.61,"endTime":2985.18,"body":"to try to make it stop bleeding."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2981.61,"endTime":2985.18,"body":"And then my tooth was in there"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2985.18,"endTime":2989.32,"body":"and I was just like, this is how"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2985.18,"endTime":2989.32,"body":"I present to my mom. So you"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2989.32,"endTime":2992.14,"body":"were you're with"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2989.32,"endTime":2992.14,"body":"like a sibling or friend when it"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":2992.14,"endTime":2993.22,"body":"actually Yeah,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2993.25,"endTime":2999.19,"body":"yeah, it was three of"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2993.25,"endTime":2999.19,"body":"us. The unfortunate thing was I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2999.19,"endTime":2999.97,"body":"don't remember who"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3000.0,"endTime":3002.58,"body":"Was there? It"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3000.0,"endTime":3002.58,"body":"sounds like it"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":3002.58,"endTime":3005.52,"body":"was traumatic. Yeah, a"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":3002.58,"endTime":3005.52,"body":"little bit a little bit."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3006.15,"endTime":3008.07,"body":"I don't know. Or"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3006.15,"endTime":3008.07,"body":"maybe your brains like these"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3008.07,"endTime":3010.68,"body":"other details are irrelevant."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3008.07,"endTime":3010.68,"body":"Just remember the pain?"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":3011.49,"endTime":3015.06,"body":"I think so I think"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":3011.49,"endTime":3015.06,"body":"that's what it is. Just remember"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":3015.06,"endTime":3015.78,"body":"the pain."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3016.11,"endTime":3018.93,"body":"Yeah. That's"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3016.11,"endTime":3018.93,"body":"intense. Yeah,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":3018.96,"endTime":3019.74,"body":"that's not a good one."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3020.22,"endTime":3024.27,"body":"I also, my"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3020.22,"endTime":3024.27,"body":"subtitle is consent to event. So"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3024.27,"endTime":3027.09,"body":"is there anything you'd like to"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3024.27,"endTime":3027.09,"body":"vent about? Get off your chest."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":3028.17,"endTime":3035.97,"body":"I'm not in particular,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":3028.17,"endTime":3035.97,"body":"other than cats who yell"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":3036.78,"endTime":3039.6,"body":"constantly. She shouldn't be a"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":3036.78,"endTime":3039.6,"body":"thing."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3039.93,"endTime":3042.48,"body":"You should let it"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3039.93,"endTime":3042.48,"body":"out. Just you know, your cat"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3042.48,"endTime":3043.47,"body":"can't hear us."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":3043.829,"endTime":3047.669,"body":"She lets me know that"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":3043.829,"endTime":3047.669,"body":"she can. And"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3048.0,"endTime":3051.0,"body":"what's your cat's"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3048.0,"endTime":3051.0,"body":"name? Josie. Josie."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":3051.15,"endTime":3055.38,"body":"Yeah, she is the bane"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":3051.15,"endTime":3055.38,"body":"of my existence. And that is"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":3055.44,"endTime":3058.32,"body":"that is definitely one thing"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":3055.44,"endTime":3058.32,"body":"that I could like rant on, or"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":3058.32,"endTime":3063.93,"body":"events about where it was really"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":3058.32,"endTime":3063.93,"body":"nice, because I gave her back to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":3063.93,"endTime":3066.87,"body":"my friend that gave her to me"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":3063.93,"endTime":3066.87,"body":"for a month while I was"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":3066.87,"endTime":3069.9,"body":"recovering back surgery and it"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":3066.87,"endTime":3069.9,"body":"was so quiet in the house. And"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":3069.9,"endTime":3074.55,"body":"then the day that I got her"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":3069.9,"endTime":3074.55,"body":"back, she gave me the worst"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":3074.55,"endTime":3079.44,"body":"attitude of all, she did not"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":3074.55,"endTime":3079.44,"body":"talk to me for about half the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":3079.44,"endTime":3085.23,"body":"day. And then would not leave me"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":3079.44,"endTime":3085.23,"body":"alone and yelled the rest of the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":3085.23,"endTime":3089.25,"body":"half. And it was the worst. I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":3085.23,"endTime":3089.25,"body":"hated it. Because it was from"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":3089.25,"endTime":3096.03,"body":"like pure silence and bliss to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":3089.25,"endTime":3096.03,"body":"this hell creature. I just"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":3096.03,"endTime":3099.75,"body":"really want to like let the door"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":3096.03,"endTime":3099.75,"body":"open all the time and see what"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":3099.75,"endTime":3100.44,"body":"happens."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3100.95,"endTime":3103.5,"body":"So she was fine,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3100.95,"endTime":3103.5,"body":"though, when you had a dog."},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3104.19,"endTime":3107.16,"body":"Yes, there was"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3104.19,"endTime":3107.16,"body":"a great barrier between us."},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3107.4,"endTime":3114.99,"body":"Okay, where the dog kept her"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3107.4,"endTime":3114.99,"body":"quiet. She came fully into her"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3114.99,"endTime":3119.46,"body":"personality. bout three weeks"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3114.99,"endTime":3119.46,"body":"after he he was gone."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3120.06,"endTime":3124.14,"body":"Or maybe she's"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3120.06,"endTime":3124.14,"body":"also depressed and like, you"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3124.14,"endTime":3127.08,"body":"need to get another dog or"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3124.14,"endTime":3127.08,"body":"something else has to change in"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3127.08,"endTime":3127.77,"body":"the house."},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3127.83,"endTime":3132.51,"body":"He's just"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3127.83,"endTime":3132.51,"body":"hungry. And she fights me a lot"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3132.51,"endTime":3136.14,"body":"and I don't like it. She doesn't"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3132.51,"endTime":3136.14,"body":"play with any other toy. This is"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3136.2,"endTime":3140.58,"body":"her dumb cats or cats are dumb"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3136.2,"endTime":3140.58,"body":"because she doesn't play with"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3140.58,"endTime":3144.03,"body":"cat toys. She plays with like a"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3140.58,"endTime":3144.03,"body":"laser pointer when I remember"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3144.03,"endTime":3149.04,"body":"that I have one but that's it."},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3144.03,"endTime":3149.04,"body":"She just wants to box my hands."},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3149.25,"endTime":3151.98,"body":"And she has sharp nails"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3149.25,"endTime":3151.98,"body":"sometimes when I forget to take"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3151.98,"endTime":3155.46,"body":"her to the vet to trim them. And"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3151.98,"endTime":3155.46,"body":"they hurt and she drew blood"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3155.46,"endTime":3159.54,"body":"multiple times this past week."},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3155.46,"endTime":3159.54,"body":"And I didn't like it. But my god"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3160.41,"endTime":3164.43,"body":"she doesn't care about toys at"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3160.41,"endTime":3164.43,"body":"all. And I bought her like"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3164.43,"endTime":3166.86,"body":"everything from Target literally"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3164.43,"endTime":3166.86,"body":"like everything"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3168.84,"endTime":3173.76,"body":"she she has human"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3168.84,"endTime":3173.76,"body":"emulated I don't know what it"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3173.76,"endTime":3177.24,"body":"is. I don't know I don't have"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3173.76,"endTime":3177.24,"body":"cats. My my neighbors have"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3177.24,"endTime":3180.18,"body":"three. And whenever we go over"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3177.24,"endTime":3180.18,"body":"there they're like do you want"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3180.18,"endTime":3183.9,"body":"the orange one because we don't"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3180.18,"endTime":3183.9,"body":"want and we're like no we don't"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3183.9,"endTime":3185.25,"body":"want to cap and Thank you"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3186.72,"endTime":3189.36,"body":"Well, yeah,"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3186.72,"endTime":3189.36,"body":"it's and it's funny I have like"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3189.36,"endTime":3192.84,"body":"three strays that just hang out"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3189.36,"endTime":3192.84,"body":"in the yard too. And I every"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3192.84,"endTime":3195.21,"body":"time I look at him like oh yeah,"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3192.84,"endTime":3195.21,"body":"you guys are cute. Do you want"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3195.21,"endTime":3198.42,"body":"to come in? And then I remember"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3195.21,"endTime":3198.42,"body":"that one yells I don't need to"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3198.42,"endTime":3199.02,"body":"have them yelling."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3200.04,"endTime":3201.9,"body":"Yeah, there is no"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3200.04,"endTime":3201.9,"body":"personality test before you"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3201.9,"endTime":3203.58,"body":"bring this animal into your"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3201.9,"endTime":3203.58,"body":"house."},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3203.85,"endTime":3208.02,"body":"No it there is"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3203.85,"endTime":3208.02,"body":"not. When when I got my dog"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3208.05,"endTime":3210.75,"body":"there, there definitely was but"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3208.05,"endTime":3210.75,"body":"I forgot that I was allergic to"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3210.75,"endTime":3216.66,"body":"dogs. I had like an hour and a"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3210.75,"endTime":3216.66,"body":"half ride home with this animal"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3216.66,"endTime":3220.17,"body":"that I met for one of the first"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3216.66,"endTime":3220.17,"body":"times like I met him like couple"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3220.17,"endTime":3222.93,"body":"times outside right and it was"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3220.17,"endTime":3222.93,"body":"cool. Because I could still"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3222.93,"endTime":3225.84,"body":"breathe. And then now I'm"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3222.93,"endTime":3225.84,"body":"driving him an hour and a half"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3225.84,"endTime":3230.04,"body":"home and a car that I can't"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3225.84,"endTime":3230.04,"body":"really turn the windows so hot."},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3230.64,"endTime":3235.2,"body":"And my eyes are watering I'm"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3230.64,"endTime":3235.2,"body":"sneezing like every mile It was"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3235.23,"endTime":3239.7,"body":"not great. Oh no. Yeah, well, it"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3235.23,"endTime":3239.7,"body":"took about two months to get"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3239.7,"endTime":3240.12,"body":"used. So"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3241.17,"endTime":3244.53,"body":"I'm so sorry about"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3241.17,"endTime":3244.53,"body":"Josie I hope you can figure that"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3244.53,"endTime":3244.86,"body":"out."},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3244.81,"endTime":3249.37,"body":"I hope so too"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3244.81,"endTime":3249.37,"body":"cuz I definitely like she she"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3249.37,"endTime":3252.43,"body":"tries to balance the cuddle"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3249.37,"endTime":3252.43,"body":"illness with it. But then she"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3252.43,"endTime":3255.25,"body":"does the the needing to I don't"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3252.43,"endTime":3255.25,"body":"like the the making of the"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3255.25,"endTime":3258.61,"body":"biscuits or something. I think"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3255.25,"endTime":3258.61,"body":"they call it where she just"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3259.57,"endTime":3264.16,"body":"drags her nails all up and down"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3259.57,"endTime":3264.16,"body":"my side while trying to her next"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3264.16,"endTime":3266.17,"body":"to me and pretending that she's"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3264.16,"endTime":3266.17,"body":"cute, but she's really just"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3266.17,"endTime":3267.22,"body":"tearing the flesh. Shelby"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3268.69,"endTime":3270.82,"body":"says, Yeah, it"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3268.69,"endTime":3270.82,"body":"doesn't sound like it's helping"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3270.82,"endTime":3276.22,"body":"or bringing value to your life."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3270.82,"endTime":3276.22,"body":"Nope, that that's not easy. She"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3276.22,"endTime":3277.54,"body":"needs a cat whisper."},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3278.29,"endTime":3279.61,"body":"Yeah, or just"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3278.29,"endTime":3279.61,"body":"leave maybe?"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3279.64,"endTime":3281.17,"body":"I don't know."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3279.64,"endTime":3281.17,"body":"We'll find out. Yeah. Or maybe a"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3281.17,"endTime":3281.74,"body":"new home."},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3282.85,"endTime":3283.72,"body":"Yeah. Oh,"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3285.37,"endTime":3287.56,"body":"Chris, thank you"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3285.37,"endTime":3287.56,"body":"for so much for coming on. Tell"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3287.56,"endTime":3290.38,"body":"us where to find you and a"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3287.56,"endTime":3290.38,"body":"little bit about your podcast."},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3290.71,"endTime":3295.0,"body":"Sure. So you"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3290.71,"endTime":3295.0,"body":"can find me at ambition Radio"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3295.0,"endTime":3298.72,"body":"Podcast on Instagram and"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3295.0,"endTime":3298.72,"body":"facebook.com slash ambition"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3298.72,"endTime":3303.91,"body":"radio. I do a show where I try"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3298.72,"endTime":3303.91,"body":"to talk to small business"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3303.91,"endTime":3310.06,"body":"owners, athletes, musicians, any"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3303.91,"endTime":3310.06,"body":"other kind of artists, and we"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3310.06,"endTime":3312.73,"body":"figure out how they kind of"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3310.06,"endTime":3312.73,"body":"balance their life out a little"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3312.73,"endTime":3316.63,"body":"bit. I've always dealt with a"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3312.73,"endTime":3316.63,"body":"lack of motivation. And even"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3316.63,"endTime":3320.38,"body":"though I'm trying to do this,"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3316.63,"endTime":3320.38,"body":"and trying to be creative, and"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3321.31,"endTime":3325.33,"body":"that was part of the the idea of"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3321.31,"endTime":3325.33,"body":"the show, to being able to keep"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3325.33,"endTime":3328.24,"body":"my motivation going, while"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3325.33,"endTime":3328.24,"body":"balancing out the rest of my"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3328.24,"endTime":3332.2,"body":"life. And I find folks that"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3328.24,"endTime":3332.2,"body":"sometimes do that. And it's"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3332.2,"endTime":3336.7,"body":"great. I come from a background"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3332.2,"endTime":3336.7,"body":"of booking concerts. So it's"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3336.7,"endTime":3341.71,"body":"really nice to talk to musicians"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3336.7,"endTime":3341.71,"body":"pretty much all the time. So a"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3341.71,"endTime":3345.55,"body":"lot of morning musicians, but I"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3341.71,"endTime":3345.55,"body":"love it. It's definitely a way"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3345.55,"endTime":3348.79,"body":"to express yourself. I've been"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3345.55,"endTime":3348.79,"body":"talking about mental health on"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3348.79,"endTime":3352.99,"body":"there a lot. Since everything's"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3348.79,"endTime":3352.99,"body":"happened, and yeah, check it"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3352.99,"endTime":3353.26,"body":"out."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3353.41,"endTime":3356.14,"body":"It's fun. Yeah, I"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3353.41,"endTime":3356.14,"body":"would say you're doing it."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3356.14,"endTime":3357.49,"body":"You're not trying. You're doing"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3356.14,"endTime":3357.49,"body":"it."},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3358.24,"endTime":3359.11,"body":"I appreciate"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3358.24,"endTime":3359.11,"body":"it."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3359.56,"endTime":3361.81,"body":"I checked it out."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3359.56,"endTime":3361.81,"body":"And you have like, 70 something"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3361.81,"endTime":3365.59,"body":"episodes like, I've listened to"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3361.81,"endTime":3365.59,"body":"one with a band, so I felt cool"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3365.59,"endTime":3368.8,"body":"or listened to it. You're doing"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3365.59,"endTime":3368.8,"body":"the thing?"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3369.4,"endTime":3373.42,"body":"Yeah. So it's"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3369.4,"endTime":3373.42,"body":"it's 70,77 episodes over the"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3373.42,"endTime":3378.13,"body":"course of three years. It's"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3373.42,"endTime":3378.13,"body":"there's been like two or three"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3378.13,"endTime":3381.61,"body":"months where I forgot that I had"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3378.13,"endTime":3381.61,"body":"a show and did not feel like"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3382.15,"endTime":3386.65,"body":"doing anything with said show"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3382.15,"endTime":3386.65,"body":"because life got in the way. So"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3386.68,"endTime":3387.4,"body":"I've been able to"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3387.4,"endTime":3387.58,"body":"Oh, my"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3387.58,"endTime":3392.05,"body":"god power podcast seems like a"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3387.58,"endTime":3392.05,"body":"whole. It's a whole hustle. So I"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3392.05,"endTime":3392.74,"body":"totally get it"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3392.92,"endTime":3397.66,"body":"so much. So"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3392.92,"endTime":3397.66,"body":"much. Editing sucks. Don't Yeah,"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3397.72,"endTime":3399.31,"body":"anybody that wants to learn"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3397.72,"endTime":3399.31,"body":"don't"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3400.57,"endTime":3403.12,"body":"I would say there"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3400.57,"endTime":3403.12,"body":"are rewards along the way, but"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3403.12,"endTime":3408.31,"body":"is grueling. Yeah. It's not fun."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3403.12,"endTime":3408.31,"body":"Yeah. But anyway, thanks for"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3408.31,"endTime":3410.41,"body":"listening, Chris. It's been a"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3408.31,"endTime":3410.41,"body":"pleasure."},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3411.22,"endTime":3413.11,"body":"Thank you. I"},{"speaker":"Chris Tondevold","startTime":3411.22,"endTime":3413.11,"body":"appreciate your time."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3413.83,"endTime":3416.26,"body":"Hey, I want to"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3413.83,"endTime":3416.26,"body":"thank you personally for"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3416.26,"endTime":3419.59,"body":"listening to the podcast. This"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3416.26,"endTime":3419.59,"body":"has been Therapy Roulette, where"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3419.59,"endTime":3423.25,"body":"I give you consent to vent. I"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3419.59,"endTime":3423.25,"body":"would love to keep making"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3423.25,"endTime":3426.97,"body":"episodes and putting out this"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3423.25,"endTime":3426.97,"body":"podcast into the world. And in"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3426.97,"endTime":3429.7,"body":"order to do that, people have to"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3426.97,"endTime":3429.7,"body":"find out about it and they have"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3429.7,"endTime":3432.97,"body":"to listen. So please leave a"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3429.7,"endTime":3432.97,"body":"review. If you have 10 seconds"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3432.97,"endTime":3437.35,"body":"to spare, reviews go a long way."},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3432.97,"endTime":3437.35,"body":"Any app, any place on the"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3437.35,"endTime":3441.1,"body":"internet, please leave a good"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3437.35,"endTime":3441.1,"body":"review. Please tell your friends"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3441.1,"endTime":3444.79,"body":"about the podcast. You could"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3441.1,"endTime":3444.79,"body":"explain it, say it's about an"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3444.79,"endTime":3447.34,"body":"honest mental health"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3444.79,"endTime":3447.34,"body":"conversation. It's a little bit"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3447.34,"endTime":3452.02,"body":"funny. It's a little bit"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3447.34,"endTime":3452.02,"body":"deprecating, or don't explain it"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3452.02,"endTime":3455.77,"body":"at all. And just send them an"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3452.02,"endTime":3455.77,"body":"airdrop link and boom, they have"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3455.77,"endTime":3458.74,"body":"it in their phone. Thank you so"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3455.77,"endTime":3458.74,"body":"much for listening. I will be"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3458.74,"endTime":3462.61,"body":"back with a new episode. Not"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3458.74,"endTime":3462.61,"body":"next Thursday but the following"},{"speaker":"Michele Baci","startTime":3462.61,"endTime":3463.21,"body":"Thursday."},{"speaker":"Theme Song","startTime":3466.0,"endTime":3470.14,"body":"Therapy Roulette"},{"speaker":"Theme Song","startTime":3466.0,"endTime":3470.14,"body":"Consent to Vent / Trauma"},{"speaker":"Theme Song","startTime":3470.14,"endTime":3476.17,"body":"disguised as comedy / Therapy"},{"speaker":"Theme Song","startTime":3470.14,"endTime":3476.17,"body":"Roulette: Consent to Vent / If"},{"speaker":"Theme Song","startTime":3476.17,"endTime":3479.95,"body":"you dont have problems, then"},{"speaker":"Theme Song","startTime":3476.17,"endTime":3479.95,"body":"youre likely repressing sh*t"},{"speaker":"Theme Song","startTime":3479.95,"endTime":3483.22,"body":"and you should find a therapist"},{"speaker":"Theme Song","startTime":3479.95,"endTime":3483.22,"body":"/ (Whos not me)"}]}