Narrator/DM Will
Hot off the presses! A new radio show headed to areas near you. Follow the journeys of three adventurers as they face forces unknown. With the dawn of steam and elemental technologies, society is progressing rapidly towards the future. But we aren't looking at the future, no, we are looking at today. Find out what's happening Today in Adventuring.
(Intro music)
DM Will
Alright! Welcome to the first episode of Today in Adventuring, a new Dungeons & Dragons podcast, cuz if we know what the world needs, it is another Dungeons & Dragons podcast. My name is Will Powers. I'm going to be the DM today. On my right I have …
Ike/Rafael
Isaac Maytum playing Rafael Grendtich
Tyson/Toa
Tyson Kohl playing Toa Tagada
Cody/Skondreag
Cody playing Skondreag the Forgotten
DM Will
Alright, we are going to jump right into it. Welcome to the world of Tatarone. The sun is rising over the ocean to the east, its light glints off the massive bridge that connects the city to the cultural financial center of the world, New Haven. It connects to one of the three major continents. The bridge extends off farther than the eye can see. The entrance to the bridge is marked by one of the three great statues. The statue of Theodore Parsivelem, overlooks the nation of Faralin in front of him. His glasses sitting on the base of his nose, as they always do. One arm extending toward New Haven. The other arm holding his signature cane. Miles away from the entrance to the bridge stands a craggy cliff of the northern Central Union. Scars in the landscape, like jagged scratches, were seemingly carved into the edge of the cliff side. Sitting near the top of one of the cliffs a large figure sits in meditation. Would you describe your character for us Toa?
Tyson/Toa
Yeah, he’s a Goliath. He has light gray skin. He's 8 ft 8 and bald. He has bluish-gray eyes, and he has a tattoo that spans from his chest all down his left arm.
DM Will
Okay, as he's sitting there meditating kind of what. What is your meditation stance, like what are you doing there?
Tyson/Toa
Toa tends to go for more of a prayer kind of thing. He likes to kneel, as opposed to sit and cross his legs. So he's doing kind of a praying position.
DM Will
Okay, um, you hear footsteps behind you and a figure walks up. Ike, could you describe your character to us?
Ike/Rafael 3:09
Sure, kind of a peaceful walk up, we have a Raphael Grendtich. He is a human man of the roguish variant, about 5’11 in stature. He wears fairly humble clothing, kind of a open v-neck style shirt with laces, fairy baggy pants, open-toed shoes, kinda a hemp material. And has almost like a Baker's Boy hat, kind of like a Newsies cap you could describe it as. He's quiet as he walks, takes in everything around him but just kind of a simple man.
DM Will
You walk out. You're about a quarter mile from the town just right next to you guys, and you know that your third companion, Skondreag, is in the Local Tavern right now and you were…
Ike/Rafael
That checks out.
DM Will
... walking up to get Tyson to bring him back to the town...
Toa/Tyson
Who?
DM Will
...Uh, Toa. That is going to be a common thing but I'm going to have to not do.
Ike/Rafael
Love that. So we’re going towards the tavern?
DM Will
That's up to you, like you are going up to get him.
Ike/Rafael
So we’re close so going down and meet up with our compatriot. Maybe he's gotten into some action in the tavern. Alright, lets go on down.
Tyson/Toa
Since he’s over there we might as well.
Ike/Rafael
Alright, yeah, into the tavern. Let’s go down.
DM Will
You walk for a couple minutes and you walk into town, as you walk into the town, it's just one road with buildings on both sides.
Ike/Rafael
This is off of one side of the road, like kind of the road that has the bridge, the bridge goes into town is what I’m seeing?
DM Will
Yes, There's like the town that you're in is actually a couple miles from that bridge it's just up on the hill next to that. Then the main road would actually lead down the cliffside toward that bridge.
Ike/Rafael
Ok, got ya.
DM Will
You enter the town you walk into has one main road going up toward the tavern and then it splits into two roads once it hits the tavern. The tavern is the center of town.
Ike/Rafael 5:14
That’s my kind of town, a tavern built around. Yeah, let’s go in.
DM Will
Ok, That you walk into the tavern and it's a little bit different than your medieval Taverns that you would see. There's a lot of like brass pipes that are going around the room. There’s steam that would be running right now. It's not actually, oddly enough, you see Skondreag sitting at a table near the bar. There's a few other patrons in the room but they don't really seem to pay you much mind so. Skondreag, would you describe yourself for the table?
Cody/Skondreag
I’m a stout, young hill dwarf of 77 years, a reddish brown braided beard, and long brownish hair, flowing behind my bandana with the top hat on. I got a trench coat kind of over my armor and a little bit of a mix between sophistication and utility.
Ike/Rafael
You have a bandana and a top hat?
Cody/Skondreag
Yep, mm hmm.
Ike/Rafael
Does that get hot ever?
Cody/Skondreag
I haven’t noticed yet.
DM Will
If you are going to ask a question you should probably do it in your character voice.
Rafael/Ike
Well Skondreag, there friend, I see your cigars are fairly well burnt down, have been here for a while?
Toa/Tyson
Yea, how many drinks have you had today?
Rafael/Ike
You look rosey.
Skondreag/Cody
This one’s fresh.
Rafael/Ike
So at least four.
Skondreag/Cody
What brings you guys back into town?
Rafael/Ike
Well, we were up on the up on the hill, Toa and I, just enjoying the view and it was about time to retire down to the tavern so here we are.
Skondreag/Cody
Something tells me you weren't up on the hill for very long.
Toa/Tyson
No, he ruined my meditation.
Rafael/Ike
Yes, I did. I tend to walk up on him. Insensitive of me.
DM Will 7:12
Roll me a perception check Ike/Rafael.
Ike/Rafael
(Rolls) Nat 20! Right off the bat.
DM Will
Wow, Nat 20!
Ike/Rafael
Right off the bat. I saw it all!
DM Will
You notice a lot of people in the bar looking at you oddly enough.
Rafael/Ike
Because of my chest hair flowing out of my shirt? I see you! I see you all!
DM Will
Definitely the chest hair is attracting their gaze but more so you see one woman sitting by the bar wearing a long red dress, eyeing you more than most people are.
Rafael/Ike
Well not normally my cup of tea but I’ll wander up there. I mean if she's giving me eyes. My lady is that a fresh drink or can I possibly top it off for you?
Vanessa/DM Will
Well, I see we have a gentleman in town right now.
Rafael/Ike
Well, where is he?
Vanessa/DM Will
Ha ha ha ha, and comedian too. What brings you into town right now?
Rafael/Ike
Well, kind of wandering the land for a little bit and my buddy Skondreag, he's the one over there with the bandana-hat combo, kind of sweaty, but we're just down here to see him and maybe make amends, talk to him and see if there is anything going on in town. Is there anything going on town?
Vanessa/DM Will
Oh, well, I do wish there was more going on in town but you see really this establishment is the backbone of this whole town here and ever since the power ran out we have not been able to pour our beers, we have not been able to host our guests nearly as well as before. No, nothing has really been going on.
Rafael/Ike
It is very dark in here but the random pile of sticks on fire in the middle make it quite smokey.
DM Will
You see a random pile sticks in the middle of the...and it's on fire.
Rafael/Ike
Very smokey in here.
(Laughing)
DM Will 9:17
Yeah, what? (Looking at Cody)
Skondreag/Cody
I’m just enjoying my fresh one. My fresh, not fresh refreshment.
Ike/Rafael
Will, can I roll for drink? opening?
DM Will
Open? Yes, go ahead.
Ike/Rafael
(Rolls) That’s a 10, I guess I do not get to open for now.
DM Will
No.You tied.
Ike/Rafael
That’s a thing that we’re doing.
Tyson/Toa
Yeah
Ike/Rafael
We’re rolling for drinks. So you don’t have to hear us open one whenever we want.
DM Will
Cool. As you're sitting there talking with… actually she hasn’t introduced herself yet.
Ike/Rafael
Yeah, mylady, what can I call you besides ...um… to breakfast tomorrow.
Vanessa/DM Will
Oh my. You are forward. My name is Vanessa. It's very nice to meet you. What did you say your name was?
(Randy)/Rafael/Ike
Uhh...Randy.
Vanessa/DM Will
Randy?
(Randy)/Rafael/Ike
Randy, yep Randy. That's my name.
Vanessa/DM Will
Wow.
Cody/Skondreag
Do we hear this?
DM Will
Yes, you hear this whole conversation.
Cody/Skondreag
So while he’s talking to Vanessa, I just kind of look at Toa and like look over the bar to see if there's anything that like a bottom.
DM Will
You do see just like bottles just sitting there just you got your whiskies and then you got your vodkas.
Toa/Tyson 10:35
Whiskey drink? (Reference to lyrics in Tubthumping by Chumbawamba)(laughing)
Cody/Skondreag
I reach over into like the scotch area and grab a bottle and look at Toa and just kind of say...slide a glass
DM Will
You notice the bartender who is standing right behind, motionless, he is totally still standing up and he's looking straight at you.
Cody/Skondreag
I look at him and raise the bottle as I continue to pour.
DM Will
He doesn't move.
Cody/Skondreag
Kind of tip my glass to him.
Toa/Tyson
And then I take the bottle instead of the shot glass.
DM Will
He doesn't even change looking to you (Toa). He's still just looking off in your direction (Skondreag).
Ike/Rafael
I think he has tetanus.
(Laughing)
Cody/Skondreag
Or, he’s powered down.
Ike/Rafael
Ooh, can I just do another perception check?
DM Will
Yes.
Ike/Rafael
Just to get this room’s feeling, describe it to me better. I know you said there's like copper pipes and stuff but maybe just need the Vibe of the room. (Rolls) Yep, it’s a six. People are here.
DM Will
It’s not hard to notice a lot of this stuff. I mean you don't really notice anything specific about the people around you other than the bartender who is actually an automaton. You can see he has his open cavity in his chest...which you would know, with your history with technology. You know that that's where a powercell would go for it and how big the cavity in his chest, you would actually know that that's what would run the power for this whole establishment. So, that is missing and he just sits there motionless.
Rafael/Ike
Hey Vanessa, I know you said that there's no power what exactly happened to it? I noticed that the barkeep over there can use an oil can if you know what I mean.
Vanessa/DM Will 12:33
LOL it is a sad story actually…I don't have…
Skondreag/Cody
Don’t waste time. Get to it.
Vanessa/DM Will
Well I guess the abridged version…
Rafael/Ike
We came across the bridge.
Vanessa/DM Will
... oh, you came from New Haven?
Rafael/Ike
Nah.
Vanessa/DM Will
We have a problem with pirates in this town. Actually, there's a small alcove down by the water at the base of the cliff where they are spending a lot of their time recently.
Rafael/Ike
So they came up and took the power cell. Is that what you’re saying?
Vanessa/DM Will
I don’t know a lot of the information…
DM Will
As she's talking the door bursts open and, in fear, everyone in the room looks over to see two pirates actually walk into the establishment.
Tyson/Toa
I want to throw a whiskey glass at one of them.
DM Will
You're just going to throw a whiskey glass at one of the pirates?
Tyson/Toa
Well, the whiskey bottle. Sorry the whiskey bottle was in my hand.
DM Will
Ok, so you are going to take, in modern terms, a $150 bottle of whiskey that was full, and throw it across the room at this pirate?
Tyson/Toa
I don’t know if it’s going to hurt.
DM Will
So, roll attack for me.
Ike/Rafael
I put a few gold pieces on the bar when I see him reeling this back just so we keep our cool.
Tyson/Toa:
(Rolls) 16.
DM Will
16. What did you roll?
Tyson/Toa
I have a 13 but I have +3 on strength.
DM Will 14:00
That’s going to be dexterity. Cuz you're throwing a bottle.
Tyson/Toa
Oh, ok.
Cody/Skondreag
Can I counter real quick?
DM Will
Are you going to him, like...
Cody/Skondreag
As I'm thinking, like immediately just from my hand comes a large purple hue and catches the bottle and changes it for a cheaper bottle.
DM Will
As you are going back you want to…
Cody/Skondreag
I want to cast mage hand and exchange a bottle from the bottom shelf to the $150.
Ike/Rafael
You want to change a Jameson to a Wild Turkey?
Cody/Skondreag
Yeah…
DM Will
Well, the other way around.
Cody/Skondreag
Depends on what part of the…
DM Will
You're right.
Tyson/Toa
I rolled a 12 plus a 1.
DM Will
I’ll let you roll dexterity and then you can use mage hand if you get above what he got I'll let you do that.
Cody/Skondreag
Ok, I got…
Tyson/Toa
The bartender’s not working so…
Ike/Rafael
That’s true. There are really no rules in here.
Tyson/Toa
Yeah. It’s kinda lawless.
Ike/Rafael
There’s pirates and...
Cody/Skondreag 15:14
(Rolls) I got a 16.
DM Will
16? You successfully get the good bottle of whiskey as he is throwing it, he like winds back to throw it and the mage hand... I would say how it goes is, as you have the mage hand grab a bottle and then you grab the bottle out of his hand and then a mage hand replaces it in his hand as he's throwing it.
Ike/Rafael
Out of my stack of five gold, I pull three of the pieces of gold off that I put on the bar.
(laughing)
DM Will
So Tyson, you throw the the bottle, it sails wide though and misses the pirates and (sound of bottle crashing) and shatters on the wall behind them.
Tyson/Toa
I have been drinking.
Skondreag/Cody
And I turn and go, “Hey!” (celebrating) Opa!
(laughing)
Skondreag/Cody
We’re just super excited you guys are here how's it going. My name Skondreag, what is yours
DM Will
Ok, roll me a persuasion.
Cody/Skondreag
(Rolls) Yes...I like that, that’s good stuff. 19!
Ike/Rafael
They bought that shit.
DM Will
Ok, As the bottle shatters on the wall they (the pirates) look over and you see them getting angry right away but as you shelled shout, “Hey man!” they get really confused as they they look at you and they just are walking toward you guys and, there's people in front of them, and they're just ignoring all the people and walking straight through them to get to you guys.
Ike/Rafael
Can I roll perception on these guys and give me and give me a rundown?
DM Will
Yeah, sure.
Ike/Rafael
(rolls) That’s a 4. They...are...pirates.
DM Will
Yeah, you see two Pirates walking towards you…
Ike/Rafael
Nice legs.
DM Will 16:42
And they are both men and I'll say you see some metallic bits around them.
Ike/Rafael
I like that.
DM Will
If someone else would like to roll percentile check, go ahead.
Cody/Skondreag
(rolls) 9!
Tyson/Toa
(rolls) 18.
DM Will
8. Toa, you look over and you see them walking toward you they actually like are definitely not all human in fact mostly they're not human. These Pirates have a lot of replaced parts and they're walking kind of really slowly as they walk, you kind of like you hear clicks (clicking sound) as their gears are turning to get them to move and they're walking up to you not aggressively but they do not look happy.
Cody/Skondreag
I have a cigar in this hand and an expensive bottle in this hand.
Skondreag/Cody
I noticed your barkeep is not working. You want me to jump behind the bar and pour you some?... this is a good stuff. You want me to…
Rafael/Ike
That is good!
Ike/Rafael
And I take out a couple pieces of gold and set them down on the counter and I kind of like make a face at the random pirates to see if that does anything for them, like, Yeah, you want this drink.
DM Will
The pirates walk out to you and he just looks you up and down and then he's like...
Pirate 1/DM Will
Ugh, I didn't realize we had others like you in our town. Well, I think I will take you up on that drink.
DM Will
And he snatches the bottle right out of your hand. And the other one sees your gold and just takes it up off the table and then jumps over the bar and looks up and down at the automaton and slaps it in the face real quick and then pushes it out of the way and just grabs as much liquor as it can carry and they just both start walking out of the tavern ignoring you guys at this point.
Skondreag/Cody
Now, mind you, that is not the way that you show good hospitality.
DM Will
The one that took the one bottle of liquor turns around and looks at you and he says,
Pirate1/DM Will
Now what would you know about hospitality in my town?
Skondreag/Cody 19:03
Well boy, I'll tell ya simply, this ain’t your town.
Pirate1/DM Will
What do you mean it's not my town? Whose town is it?
Skondreag/Cody
You come in and knock some animatonic, (struggles to say automaton) my bartender…
Ike/Rafael
There it is.
Skondreag/Cody
...around. He’s not even powered up. You think you can bully these kind of people?
Rafael/Ike
You’re kinda being a bit of a jerk.
Skondreag/Cody
We can settle this. You can just sit down we can have a conversation or we can do something else
Cody/Skondreag
And at this I kind of like lean towards Toa.
Tyson/Toa
And I stand up. My whole 8 foot 8 giant frame and I stare at him
Ike/Rafael
I kinda tighten the grip on my cane, just like readjust and grab it a little bit tighter.
DM Will
Ok, You're trying to intimidate? Roll for that for me.
Ike/Rafael
Yeah, I’m going to let you do that one Tyson.
Cody/Skondreag
You have a cane. I have a cane.
Ike/Rafael
Oh boy.
Tyson/Toa
(rolls) I rolled a 4. So, apparently, I’m not very intimidating.
DM Will
Ok, you get up to stand up and try and intimidate them...
Tyson/Toa
I have been drinking a little bit.
DM Will
...as you get up you get caught on the table and try and sit back down but miss your chair and fall onto the floor.
Skondreag/Cody
Oh, here we go.
Ike/Rafael
Are the pirates walking or what are they doing? Are they by the bar?
DM Will 20:19
So now they were walking out the door when you started talking and now they're stopped by the door looking at you guys.
Ike/Rafael
I’m going to use my mage hand and cast it to close the door to hit them with the door. And I’m going to be like...
Rafael/Ike
You gotta watch out for that wind. You guys are dumb. You should have watched out for that. You're so silly.
DM Will
As that happens the one (Pirate 2) that was carrying all the bottles of liquor dropped a couple (clanking sound) and he looks right at you and you see him just kind of move his hand down to his side.
Ike/Rafael
Yeah I guess I'm going to look over to Vanessa and I grabbed her hand and then I go…
Rafael/Ike
Mylady, until then.
Ike/Rafael
And I can give her a slight kiss when I stand up and then like face the door with my cane. I’m putting my weight on it.
Cody/Skondreag
I take my cigar and when I see Toa kind of trip I say...
Skondreag/Cody
This is happening.
Cody/Skondreag
I take my cigar and tuck it behind my bandana. Still burning.
(laughing)
Cody/Skondreag
And I reach for my chest pocket and pull out a deck of cards.
Ike/Rafael
You have a deck of cards. Oh, hat’s cool.
DM Will
Alright yeah, let's roll for initiative real quick.
Ike/Rafael
Yeeeess! (rolls) 18!
Tyson/Toa
15!
Cody/Skondreag
Nat 20 baby!
Ike/Rafael
Wow, wow, wow, wow, wow..
Cody/Skondreag 12:44
And I have +0 initiative. You have not rolled for that.
Ike/Rafael
I gotta roll for a drink again. (rolls) That’s an 8, so I will not get to drink.
Tyson/Toa
Can’t do it.
Cody/Skondreag
You’re gunna be parched.
DM Will
We are going to have Cody go first cuz he rolled a 20. So you’re first up in combat.
Cody/Skondreag
Who’s Cody?
DM Will
Skondreag.
Cody/Skondreag
There we go. I immediately just kind of look at the one (Pirate 2) still holding the bottles seeing him kind of has the easiest of the victims, we’ll call them, I will call them pirates, of the pirates. And I'm flipping like I'm playing with the cards in my hand and so I'm flipping the card and I kind of threw my hand and you noticed that there's large kind of hue of purple flowing through, through the card, and I cast ice knife and... (rolls) got a 15.
DM Will
Ok, Is that an attack roll?
Cody/Skondreag
Yes
DM Will
15 does hit.
Cody/Skondreag
And then I take 3 damage or I hit for 3 damage and then the shard explodes and each creature within 5 feet of it must succeed at a dex saving throw or take two D6 cold damage.
DM Will
What was... is that a Dex?
Cody/Skondreag
A dex saving throw.
DM Will
Alright, he’s going to roll. (rolls) he got an 11.
Cody/Skondreag
It takes 13.
DM Will
The first one (Pirate 2) takes 3 (damage) and the second one (Pirate 1) would take how much?
Cody/Skondreag
Two D6.
DM Will 23:38
So you’ll have to roll that.
(Sound of icy thrown card flying and hitting and exploding)
Cody/Skondreag
He takes 9.
DM Will
Wow, jeez, that was way more effective on the second one than the first one. Next order is Tyson, you are on the ground.
Toa/Tyson
Who?
DM Will
Toa, you're on the ground.
Toa/Tyson
How close is the closest one to me.
DM Will
it's going to be like 15 feet from the bar so they're right next to the door.
Ike/Rafael
Walking out?
DM Will
No, you guys next to the bar, they’re by the door.
Ike/Rafael
Ooo, oh, oh.
Tyson/Toa
I guess I'm just going to run up to one of them and Judo chop them in the neck.
DM Will
Ok, roll for attack.
Ike/Rafael
Roll for Judo.
Tyson/Toa
(rolls) 19.
DM Will
19? That is a hit.
Tyson/Toa
Really?
DM Will
(laughing) You actually missed. (sarcastically)
Tyson/Toa
8
DM Will
8 damage. Alright, was that the one closest to you or the…
Tyson/Toa
To me? (Pirate 2)
DM Will 24:50
He is not looking great already to be honest. So it's going to be his turn, the one with the bottles (Pirate 2) he's just going to drop all the bottles (sound of bottles hitting the floor) and then you’re just going to see him raise his hand up and then his hand pulls down and then…
Ike/Rafael
Inspector Gadget!!!
(laughing)
DM Will
And Tyson he's pointing right at you. Wiith his other hand and then you just see this (strange sound effect) magic power fill up the little area in his hand and he is going to…
Tyson/Toa
I’m in danger.
(laughing)
Ike/Rafael
Roll for drink. (rolls)
DM Will
So, yeah. He's going to roll for attack.
Ike/Rafael
16. Thank you. (can opening sound)
DM Will
Finally. He's going to shoot his little cannon at you that's going to be an 8.
Ike/Rafael
That’s rude.
Tyson/Toa
Wha wha wha.
DM Will
Your AC is higher than 8.
Tyson/Toa
Oh, I thought you said... I thought it was 8 damage.
DM Will
No, that was the roll to hit you.But this one has a cool ability. So you're all within...how? You're all standing like near each other right? You're all in front of the bar?
Tyson/Toa
I'm right next to whoever that guy is because I Judo chopped him in the throat.
Cody/Skondreag
I'm still pretty much still next to the bar.
DM Will
Cool, Toa, I’m going to have you roll a dex saving roll.
Tyson/Toa
Ok, (rolls) 9!
DM Will 26:16
9? Ok, you're…going to take... (rolls)... 8 fire damage... (Sound of fireball)...from an explosion that happens right next to you but doesn't hit you. It happened close enough to you.
Tyson/Toa
So it does how much…
DM Will
8
Tyson/Toa
8
DM Will
Ike it's going to be your turn after that.
Ike/Rafael
How far away are they from like where I'm at? Are they less than ten feet? The door?
DM Will
Yes, I would say like ten feet is about right.
Ike/Rafael
So I am going to… so he, you said, dropped some liquor bottles?
DM Will
Yeah. They’re on the floor.
Ike/Rafael
Would you say… you said it was high proof alcohol...high dollar?… so I’m going to use prestidigitation and cast a shower of sparks at them and light them on fire.
DM Will
I love this idea. I'm going to roll...I'm going to have you roll to see if the sparks actually light on fire at this point.
Ike/Rafael
Did you say a D20?
DM Will
Yeah.
Ike/Rafael
Give me a natural
DM Will
If it's over 15, I'll let you have it.
Ike/Rafael
(rolls) Well, it’s a 10. I have some crappy sparks.
DM Will
He looks over and you're just...what you do, raise your hands? Or…
Ike/Rafael
Oh yeah, I feel like it would be kind of like a one-finger kind of a point thing...
DM Will
So you just, finger gun him and just like point and then as you…
Ike/Rafael
The gun fire and pffft. Just a little bit.
DM Will 27:38
One or two sparks fall out
Ike/Rafael
Good and when it happens I take my extra action, I’m going to helluva jump over the bar like to the other side and get some cover cuz he has that shooting hand and I don't think I can take one of those. I'll be quite honest.
DM Will
So that brings us to the next pirate’s turn (Pirate 1). He's going to actually like squat into a squatting position and then you see these little caps pop open (popping sound) on both of his knees.
Ike/Rafael
Oh, no. Would you call that a knee cap?
(laughing)
Tyson/Toa
Oh no, I’m going to just leave so we need to stop the podcast.
DM Will
Day 1, we're done.
Ike/Rafael
Thank you for joining us…
DM Will
He gets into a squatting position and both of his knee caps pop up and one of them looks, as you see it pop open, you see this like little spiky arrowhead in one side, and then in the other side you see another bright glowing light. And Tyson he's going to... you’re right next to them so he's going to be aiming at you. I'm going to roll to hit with my little grappling hook real quick. (rolls) That's going to be a 16.
Tyson/Toa
Ok, that hits.
DM Will
So there's this little pop sound and it's grappling hook shoots out of his knee and embeds itself... let’s see how much damage that's going to be real quick. (rolls) You are going to take (arrow sound) 5 damage from that and then it's lodges itself in your leg. And it's going to start retracting toward him…
Ike/Rafael
Bye Toa.
Tyson/Toa
Just wait, just wait.
DM Will
That's going to start retracting toward him and if you are still and if you are in it next turn fun things are going to happen.
Tyson/Toa
Don’t worry about it.
DM Will 29:31
Back up to the top of the order, Skondreag.Cody/Skondreag: After seeing this, I think I may need to slow my action a little bit. So what are my pirate friends looking like?
DM Will
At this point the one that was holding the bottles and dropped them and shot the thing out of his hand. He does not look good. He’s got oil leaking out of his other arm and then..
Ike/Rafael
(In sarcastic whispering) Light it on fire.
(laughing)
Cody/Skondreag
I would love to. I’m kind of in the opposite direction than that so I'm actually going to try to freeze some joints. So, coming at him, so I pick another card and it spins in my hands, above my hands, and from my hip throw it, and it'll ice up and I just go……
Skondreag/Cody
Freeze!
Cody/Skondreag
And shoot ray of frost
Ike/Rafael
Nice.
DM Will
Ok, is that something you have to roll for or…
Ike/Rafael
It’s a cantrip isn’t it.
Cody/Skondreag
It’s a cantrip. So...
DM Will
I think you have to roll to hit.
Cody/Skondreag
(rolls) 21.
DM Will
That hits.
Ike/Rafael
Chaching, Kerching.
Cody/Skondreag
(rolls) damage at 6.
DM Will
The oil stops leaking. Good news! But not moving much anymore he kind of looks up at you and for a moment and you think he's about to collapse but as he's falling he catches himself and steadies himself, ready to go.
Cody/Skondreag
His speed is reduced by 10.
Cody/Skondreag 31:15
At the start of my next turn.
Tyson/Toa
Where is that thing lodged into my body?
DM Will
In your leg.
Tyson/Toa
In like...thigh position?
DM Will
Yes, in your thigh.
Tyson/Toa
So I'm going to grab a hold of the rope, run, and try to flying knee this dude (Pirate 1) right in the face.
DM Will
Ok.
Ike/Rafael
Go flying knee. Lay it on him.
Tyson/Toa
(rolls) Alright, well, I rolled a 12.
DM Will
A 12. That is not enough to hit him and as you were getting closer he actually had an action ready in case anyone came closer and he's going to basically, out of his knee, this wall of flames just kind of erupts and almost...doesn't wrap itself around you but it shoots up out of his knee and you are thoroughly engulfed in flames. And you are going to take (rolls) (flaming sound) a solid 9 damage.
Ike/Rafael
So he's on fire now? Toa’s on fire, is that what I’m seeing?
DM Will
I mean there's a lot of… I wouldn't say Toa actually catches fire but he has a face full of fire right now.
Tyson/Toa
And as a bonus action I am going to use a keypoint and use fury of blows which allows me to just to use two strikes.
Ike/Rafael
Bougie.
Tyson/Toa
The first one does 5.
DM Will
Do you have to roll to see if it hits or…
Tyson/Toa
it says that after you take the attack actually turn you can spend one key point to make two unarmed strikes on the bonus action.
DM Will
Unarmed strike, you have to roll to see if it hits. It is not a guaranteed damage,
Tyson/Toa 33:11
Well the first one is 22.
DM Will
That doesn’t hit. (pause) Just kidding.
(laughing)
Cody/Skondreag
All of our faces were like, uh?
DM Will
Retreat!
Ike/Rafael
Not good! Are these guys speaking common?
DM Will
Yeah.
Tyson/Toa
The second one only does 11.
DM Will
So the first one has hit you can go ahead and roll for damage on that.
Tyson/Toa
(rolls) 6!
DM Will
At this point like he's starting to leak a little bit of oil out of his arm. Specifically, the knee that shot the the grappling hook at you is definitely like starting to leak quite a bit and both of them are starting to get a little nervous. You see it on their faces. They're kind of looking at each other and for his action, the pirate that shot his hand is going to take his other arm, is going to move it up and then he's going to grab his forearm and pull it open. And then you're going to see this little mechanical bird come out of his forearm. And he looks at his friend (Pirate 2) and says...
Pirate 1/DM Will
Just in case we have to let the captain know.
DM Will
...and you see the bird shoot out of his arm and then fly out of the establishment.
Ike/Rafael
Oh, that’s not good.
Cody/Skondreag
Yeah, can we react to that?....or it’s gone?
DM Will
I will give you one chance as a reaction you are the only one that's not going to
Ike/Rafael
I’m behind the bar.
DM Will
You're (Rafael) behind the bar, you (Toa) got a face full of fire. I will give you (Skondreag) a chance.
Tyson/Toa 35:01
I’m going to die by the way.
DM Will
You have to roll a 17.
Cody/Skondreag
So we're going to make this worth it and see what happens.
DM Will
This is level 4 (the bird).
Cody/Skondreag
What am I rolling?
DM Will
How are you trying to stop
Cody/Skondreag
I'm just chucking a card at him again. Ice knife or ray of frost. Something in that lane.
DM Will
I'll give you a shot, the AC on this, cuz it's a tiny little bird, is going to be higher though.
Cody/Skondreag
Ok. We’re going to see what happens.
Ike/Rafael
Give him a loop. Throw it!
Cody/Skondreag
(rolls) There we go... 14!
DM Will
That is not going to do it. You see this bird as bird comes up out of his arm you you watch as Skondreag pulls the card and throws it towards the bird. An ice spike forms in the air, just about to hit it. The door... it's one of those doors that like swings open and shut like the old saloon doors. The bird flies out and the ice spike hits the saloon door as it closes again.
Cody/Skondreag
And explodes!
Ike/Rafael
Oh, damage?
DM Will
I allowed it to happen so I guess I'll allow damage too. Why not?
Cody/Skondreag
(rolls) I got 2 on the explosion.
DM Will
As that explodes and the pirate that it came out of his arm, that shard hits him in the back of the neck and he just freezes up. And then you hear that clicking sound again (click, clock, clock…..clock) And then he just kind of falls. His whole body stops moving and he just falls onto his side. He's no longer moving.
Ike/Rafael
(hums the “success song” from Zelda games)(laughing)
DM Will 36:57
In the turn order, we're going to move over to Ike.
Ike/Rafael
Yes! You said there are pipes up above?
DM Will
Yeah, like steam pipes.
Ike/Rafael
Ok, so I'm assuming that if the power’s... correct me if I’m wrong, that if power is not functioning in this building that those pipes would be full of water?
DM Will
That would be a good assumption, yeah.
Ike/Rafael
And my buddy Toa is on fire! (sung like an 80s band lead singer) and he’s going to die, not quite die, if we don’t do something.
Cody/Skondreag
Not quite dead (with Monty Python accent)
Rafael/Ike
Not quite dead yet. I am going to use mage hand and try to tug one of those pipes down.
DM Will
I'll let you do a roll for that I don't even know what it like the modifier. yeah cuz mage hand can only lift up to like, what, 15 pounds.
Ike/Rafael
I’ll shoot an arrow at the pipe.
DM Will
That would be better. Yeah.
Ike/Rafael
An arrow so that’s a ranged attack. (rolls) ….. 10.
DM Will
It’s a pipe so you hit it. And yes water does come out of it. You’re no longer on fire.
Tyson/Toa
Thank you.
Ike/Rafael
High five you! Whoo! (Tyson and Ike slap hands)
Cody/Skondreag
We call those sprinklers.
DM Will
But as the water is pouring…
Ike/Rafael
Yeah, water on robots!
DM Will
... yep that's where I'm going with this...as water pouring on you and on him also remember that he does have a metallic…(wire attached to the grappling hook)
Tyson/Toa 38:22
But it is connected to a rope.
DM WIll
I was thinking like wire but…
Tyson/Toa
Ropes don’t...
Ike/Rafael
But you said rope.
DM Will
Did I say rope?
Cody/Skondreag
You did say rope.
Ike/Rafael
If the recorder would recall…
Cody/Skondreag
The vote of 3 to 1.
Ike/Rafael
He said rope.
DM Will
Well, if I’m editing this and you guys are wrong…I’m killing you.
(laughing)
Ike/Rafael
I’m lying through my teeth.
DM Will
So since I said rope, I won’t have happen what was going to happen. But the guy is going my take 5 points of damage as the water hits him. And there's some open points along his body and you see along his chest there’s this little box that is glowing a little bit. As the water seeps into there, these little bolts of electricity are kind of shooting out of it, on the fritz. That is what is dealing him 5 Points of damage. Had that not been a rope, you (Toa) would have also taken 5 points of damage.
Tyson/Toa
(whispering loudly) I would have died. That’s ok.
DM Will
It’s now his (Toa’s) turn.
Tyson/Toa
I would have died.
Cody/Skondreag
Everybody needs a rope.
DM Will
On the very first…
Tyson/Toa
On the very first encounter, yeah. I threw a bottle of whiskey at him alright?
Tyson/Toa 39:31
I understand, I would be mad too.
DM Will
And he just watched his buddy die.
Tyson/Toa
That wasn't me. I didn’t kill his buddy.
DM Will
You're right.
Cody/Skondreag
That was me.
DM Will
He is not liking the situation at this point with his little power source right here going on the fritz. He's definitely...and with his buddy just dying, he's getting a little frightful. You see his eyes they’re kind of getting wider.
Ike/Rafael
I stand up behind the bar and I give Vanessa a little wink and I pop down behind the bar.
DM Will
She sees you and then she looks back as a combat and looks at you hiding behind the bar.
Ike/Rafael
I give her a thumbs up
DM Will
Just from behind the bar? Just you hand?
Ike/Rafael
I give (boop) thumbs up.
DM Will
So he's actually going to...from his other wrist he's going to have a knife... is going to pop out.
(side talking)
DM Will
That is exactly that's what it is. And he's actually going to cut the rope that was holding you
Tyson/Toa
You said it, it was a rope.
DM Will
and he's going to try and disengage from you this turn and move toward the door
Ike/Rafael
He's leaving. You can give him a little attack.
DM Will
He is within your area.
Tyson/Toa
Yeah.
Ike/Rafael 40:42
Opportunity attack. Smash and literally…
Tyson/Toa
Ok. I want to go ahead and just shoot for unarmed strike that's all I'm good for. (rolls) 22! Wow! That’s alright!
Ike/Rafael
Get some damage. You’re about to get some health back.
Tyson/Toa
(rolls) 6!
(anticipatory sounds)
DM Will
Do it how you want.
Tyson/Toa
So, I reach up and I grab his arm and as he turns around I throw my leg up and just kick his head off.
DM Will
As he starts running away you latch onto his arm. The hair is freshly singed on your own arm. You do a flip and hold him down and as you're pulling down the back of your body swings around and your heel connects with the side of his head and you hear this satisfying crack (cracking sound) and then his head disconnects. There's a bunch of wires that fall to the floor and oil starts spurting from where his head used to be. His body hits the ground and you see…(clicking sounds)
Ike/Rafael
I guess the pirate's life isn't for him.
(laughing)
Ike/Rafael
I love pirate puns in this arc.
(Intermission music)
Will
Hey, I hope you’re enjoying the show. Welcome to Afternoon in Adventuring. I'm Will, the Creator and DM of this podcast, and I just have a few things I'd like to share with you, the listener. First off, I wanted to apologize for the poor sound quality these first couple episodes. This is my first attempt at mixing audio and as you can see, I need a little bit of work in the future episodes, I had a friend of mine come and fix some of the issues so please keep listening, it does get better over time. Second, I have an announcement to make about a giveaway that we're doing. If you would like to be the owner of a brand new set of D&D books, the Player Handbook, Monster Manual, and the Dungeon Master's Guide, signed by the cast of the show, there are three ways for you to enter into this giveaway. First you can give us a 5-star review on whatever service you're listening. You can show the share the show on social media with the hashtag #tiadvpodcast. That's t.i.a.d.v podcast.
43:30
Finally you can send a question about the show to our e-mail to be addressed in the post-show. If you like this content and want to be part of making more things like it, go check out our patreon link in the description. There are lots of benefits to joining our patreon like access to Yesterday in Adventuring, a show where we break down Today in Adventuring and talk about everything that goes into it as well as answering fan questions and talking about fan theories and the players’ theory. Other tiers have access to live stream Q and A's for you get to meet and hang out with the crew. You can create names for NPCs and locations and as we go, more tiers will be added. If you have any questions you would like answered in the post show, or you want to send us memes or you just want to shoot us a message about what you liked or didn't like about the show you can send that to tiadvpodcast@gmail.com . That's t.i.a.d.v.podcast @gmail.com. Finally, do you have a personal message for a friend or family member that you want to share with them in a fun and creative way? Well, send us an email and your message could go in this midsection of our next podcast. Thank you so much for listening to this and I think it's time for us to get back into the episode.
(same music starts and fades)
DM Will
Yes. That’s going to be the end of combat.
Tyson/Toa
I scream in rage because these are the same pirates that used to come to my…
(Will is shaking his head)
Tyson/Toa
They're not the same pirates I just got told…
(laughing)
Tyson/Toa
But pirates...pirates are a big part…
DM Will
Had you looked for it I would have been able to tell you when they were but if you want to do that now you could roll a perception check or a history check.
Tyson/Toa
Freakin’ perception check.
Ike/Rafael
We can just edit that part out where Tyson pretends like…
(laughing)
Tyson/Toa
(rolls) 6. These are pirates.
DM Will
Yeah, that's all you see is that this is pirates are not...your familiar with pirates but not these ones.
Toa/Tyson 45:40
Pirates, not these pirates, destroyed my people.
Cody/Skondreag
Do these pirates have a super killer bandanas?
DM Will
Yep, sure.
Ike/Rafael
Ahhh. The hunt for bandanas.
DM Will
I’ll let you decide what the design of the bandana is too.
Cody/Skondreag
I’m going to go classic like the red with a…
Ike/Rafael
Jolly Roger?
Cody/Skondreag
...a little bit of the Paisley.
DM Will
Kind of torn edges? But they’re not?
Ike/Rafael
It’s still useable.
DM Will
No, it’s like fashionably torn.
Cody/Skondreag
Yeah, and maybe a bolo tie.
DM Will
There’s no bolo tie. One or the other.
Ike/Rafael
Don’t be greedy. So I'd like to pop up from behind the bar and have a bottle and a shot glass in my hand and be pouring a drink for Vanessa.
(Randy)/Rafael/Ike
I don't know if you saw it back there but I totally killed that one robot with the water. I know you probably saw it though.
Ike/Rafael
And I set the drink down in front of her.
Vanessa/DM Will
Didn't your big friend over there behead him with his foot
(Randy)/Rafael/Ike
Iiiiii mean, yeah, he just put a little bit of damage on him but I shot some water on him and shocked him.
Vanessa/DM Will
Wow, well thank you so much.
(Randy)/Rafael/Ike
Just like it shocked you.
Vanessa/DM Will 46:51
It was very shocking, yes. I am so thankful I can't even tell you guys. These pirates have...they're the reason our bar is shut down. They are the ones that stole our power cell but this isn’t over. I've seen that bird before and last time one of our people attacked one of the pirates, it was really really bad.
(Randy)/Rafael/Ike
Can we define really bad?
Cody/Skondreag
While he's having his love conversation can we…
Ike/Rafael
It’s not love. Did you get some health back (Toa).
Tyson/Toa
I got 4.
Ike/Rafael
It’s not love.
Cody/Skondreag
And can I roll for medicine like rub some alcohol on it.
Ike/Rafael
We're going to make healing up because we don't have a healer.
DM Will
You’re going to pour alcohol on his burns?
Cody/Skondreag
No, that was not...I was not going…
Ike/Rafael
No, you said it so pour alcohol on it.
DM Will
Please, please, pour some alcohol on his burns.
Cody/Skondreag
First off, I was going to fix the hole in his leg.
DM Will
Well, the thing is still in there so…
Tyson/Toa
I think I’m bleeding out. I’m starting to get a little hazy.
Cody/Skondreag
I was going to roll medicine and see if I can get him patched up so we can find something in this town.
DM Will
I mean you can definitely just kind of like take some cloth. You could even take the bandana that you just got and wrap it around…
Ike/Rafael
You need to make a choice, sacrifice the bandana or the life….
(laughing)
Tyson/Toa 48:30
The sweaty, old, germ...
Ike/Rafael
Mmmm, jaundice.
Cody/Skondreag
I just pour some of the good scotch on it and then just wring it out and I say…
Skondreag/Cody
Hey remember that….
Cody/Skondreag
Just as I shove my finger into and kind of patch around the wound….And then I run!
Tyson/Toa
Just reflex, my leg kicks out just as he gets away and flips his chair.
DM Will
Are you still talking with Vanessa the bar?
Ike/Rafael
Yeah, were still chatting.
Vanessa/DM Will
...But, yeah, last time the pirates sent one of those weird creepy little birds out and there were these automatons that came into town and they literally burned down half of our town.
Cody/Skondreag
Was it the half with the doctor?
Vanessa/DM Will
No, our only person that knows anything medically related is out of town but I know we do have some old supplies at the market. But the market is in terrible condition right now. It was it was raided by the pirates last time they were here.
Rafael/Ike
So, I guess we’re left with an option. Do we care about this town or do we just get out of skidaddily doodie and get out of here.
Vanessa/DM Will
You're just going to abandon us?
(Randy)/Rafael/Ike
I mean unless you can offer me something worthwhile..
Ike/Rafael
That sounded dirty. It is not…
Cody/Skondreag
Ike is going to have a hard time making this PG-13.
(laughing)
Vanessa/DM Will 50:17
I cannot offer you anything personally. All of my possessions have been taken but I know where they are.
Cody/Skondreag
How many atomatomtoms?
Ike/Rafael
Atomatation.
Vanessa/DM Will
Automatons?
Cody/Skondreag
Yes, those things. Yes, how many of those are there?
Vanessa/DM Will
The only ones that we saw... We don't have anyone to defend our village there is only...
Cody/Skondreag
We can see that.
Ike/Rafael
(rolls for drink) Yea, 11!
(laughing)
Vanessa/DM Will
There is only two that came in when they burned the town, but we had no means to fight them back.
(Randy)/Rafael/Ike
They were not those guys that we just saw? It didn't look like them?
Vanessa/DM Will
No, they’re not…
Cody/Skondreag
Alright...
Vanessa/DM Will
...the same one that came last time.
(Randy)/Rafael/Ike
Are they bigger or smaller?
Vanessa/DM Will
The automatons?
(Randy)/Rafael/Ike
Yeah.
Vanessa/DM Will
Smaller.
Cody/Skondreag
...I mean, I get it Toa, but if our friend (Rafael) would not hide behind the bar instead fight in front of it…
Rafael/Ike
Hey, I killed one of ‘em. I dumped water all over one of them.
Toa/Tyson 51:23
You did It but I'm also…
Rafael/Ike
I got water on YOU!
Toa/Tyson
You did, you did.
Rafael/Ike
You were on fire!
Toa/Tyson
Hey, hey, hey.
Rafael/Ike
Ungrateful…
Toa/Tyson
I almost died! I don't know what I'm doing right now okay! Also, I'm hallucinating a little bit. I’m pretty sure there's a unicorn out there. I, I…
DM Will
There is not a unicorn out there.
Toa/Tyson
You sure? I thought...
Cody/Skondreag
We both can just look at each other and go... (Skondreag and Rafael looking at each other and shaking their heads)
Rafael/Ike
Yeah, not good.
Vanessa/DM Will
If you do need some medical supplies. I know the owner of the market used to be a healer...
(Ike comments and Cody makes facial expressions and and it generates laughs)
Vanessa/DM Will
...and I do think that she might have left some near...
Ike/Rafael
Cody keeps making facial expressions but nothing audible from my jokes and...and like nobody's laughing.
Vanessa/DM Will
If you need to find something to fix yourselves up, I’m sure you can find it in the market.
(Randy)/Rafael/Ike
We’ll be on our way.
Cody/Skondreag
Alright, this is the best part of every Dungeons and Dragons....you ready?
Skondreag/Cody
How about you go to the market.
(laughing)
Rafael/Ike 52:22
How about we split up.
(more laughing)
Tyson/Toa
I just leave. I head out…
DM Will
You just walk out?
Tyson/Toa
I just walk out. I’m like this…
DM Will
After you walk out of the tavern, you look at the...down in front of you, this is the single road that leads out of town and to the right you see an old building that is clearly been broken into and there's a sign up top that just says in lit up...what should say Market, but there's no power and some letters are missing now and it just says rket.
Ike/Rafael
Ah yes…
Cody/Skondreag
Classic.
Ike/Rafael
Local rket.
DM Will
Then on the left there's a bank that doesn't even have a front to it anymore like it is totally gone.
Cody/Skondreag
I kind of look at my friend and ask him to step outside with me.
Ike/Rafael
Me?
Cody/Skondreag
You.
Ike/Rafael
Ok.
Cody/Skondreag
And as I grab ….
Ike/Rafael
What’s my name?
Cody/Skondreag
Reginald?
(laughing)
Ike/Rafael: Randy
If we’re talking to Vanessa.
Cody/Skondreag 53:24
Randy?
Ike/Rafael
I lied to her. I wasn’t quite sure if she was trying to flirt with me or kill me.
Cody/Skondreag
And I look at him and I go…
Skondreag/Cody
Randy….
Cody/Skondreag
Very questioning.
Skondreag/Cody
Yes, how about we step outside and look at what we're up against.
(Randy)/Rafael/Ike
Exquisite. Vanessa, dear, would you like to step out with us and
Skondreag/Cody
no, no, no
(Randy)/Rafael/Ike
Just me and my friend, you stay here.
Vanessa/DM Will
It's really okay. I should probably make sure that people in here are okay.
(Randy)/Rafael/Ike
Yeah, we were….
Skondreag/Cody
That would have been an heroic thing to do.
(Randy)/Rafael/Ike
Okay, we're going to go outside and Vanessa, lovely, lovely meeting you. I can’t express, but your voice is like hot chocolate in my ears…
DM Will
As you walk out she's like about to kiss you on the cheek and then you walked out as as you didn't see her leaning in…
Ike/Rafael
Skondreag, you son of a biscuit. She was gunna give me a smooch right on the mouth.
Skondreag/Cody
Alright, so here's how I see this one out. Our big guy (Toa) is going to get better, not great, but better. The pirates down there have everything that these townspeople used to have so if things get returned to the townspeople and some of the things…
Rafael/Ike
We can say they got lost. I see…
Skondreag/Cody
You're following my perception.
Ike/Rafael
Yes,I was going to do a rhyming thing like Princess Bride but I couldn’t think of anything. (laughing)
Ike/Rafael 55:00
It’s just you and me and we can see how it be…
DM Will
Are you standing next to Toa?
All
(Everyone talking at the same time)
Tyson/Toa
I was right outside the door.
(laughing at Ike pantomiming being surprised)
Rafael/Ike
Oh, oh god! I didn’t see you standing there.
Skondreag/Cody
Dude, you blend right into the driftwood.
Rafael/Ike
Crazy!
Toa/Tyson
Yeah my burns really blend into the…
Skondreag/Cody
Maybe it is because the market got burned too. Some of that rket.
Ike/Rafael
What are some of the...give me a...is it like an old western? Are we talking... what does the town look like?
DM Will
So it's much more like industrial-looking but it's a little older if you were to go into like New Haven. It's much more like...if you seen Legend of Korra, like the city from the Legend of Korra.
Ike/Rafael
Well, I haven’t seen Legend of Korra. To obscure. Give me something that everyone has seen.
DM Will
Sherlock Holmes but clean.
Ike/Rafael
Oh, like Wild, Wild, West with Will Smith?
DM Will
Cleaner, but, yes.
Cody/Skondreag
Making sure that … are the same page I step back into the bar and go…
Skondreag/Cody
Don't worry folks, will do our best.
DM Will
The moment you say that there's just cheers from everyone.
Ike/Rafael 56:27
Can I hear that? (smirking) I go in and do the same thing
Rafael/Ike
Don’t worry folks, we’ll do our best.
DM Will
They cheer even louder as you coming in
Tyson/Toa
I just walk in....
Toa/Tyson
Guys, I need a doctor!
Tyson/Toa
Everyone just goes quiet.
DM Will
It's now quiet that they're kind of looking at you….
Ike/Rafael
You’re terrifying…
DM Will
You are like an 8…
Ike/Rafael
Like Two-face
DM Will
Yeah. you don't look great. You just hear one guy in the back like…
One guy in the back of the bar/DM Will
Go to the market!
Rafael/Ike
Let’s go do that.
Toa/Tyson
We're going…
Ike/Rafael
Are we really going to find this out and go to the market and find supplies and then patch him up.
DM Will
I'll just say you walk into the market. It’s trashed…
Tyson/Toa
Like me in like 45 minutes.
DM Will
...like it is the whole thing. It is everywhere and it takes you a really long time to find what you need, like an hour or two hours. Eventually you do find a couple of health potions behind the counter...
Ike/Rafael
Just two.
Ike/Rafael 57:27
I break the case. Yeah, I break the case of my cane.
DM Will
Yeah, it is in a case…
Ike/Rafael
I knew what you were going to say, I could see it in your eyes. Glass case, I broke it.
Tyson/Toa
He broke it.
(Will looks at Cody)
Cody/Skondreag
Nothing.
DM Will
Nothing? Ok,
Tyson/Toa
Find out if there’s any gold.
DM Will
There is no gold. It has basically been totally cleaned out.
Cody/Skondreag
Is there anything like beneficial value outside of the healing stuff that we look for, is there anything that would be helpful to our endeavor. Specifically flammable stuff.
Tyson/Toa
Is there any fuels or anything, that would be sick.
DM Will
I would say you can find like a can of oil.
Cody/Skondreag
Gunpowder?
DM Will
There’s no gunpowder laying around. I will say that guns do exist. They are not common at all.
Ike/Rafael
Those pirates had like three of them.
DM Will
Those weren’t guns, That was like magic power
Cody/Skondreag
Oil jugs?
DM Will
Yeah, so I would say I'll let you have two cans of oil.
All
Yes…
DM Will
They're like, they're going to be about the same size as ones that you would buy for a gas station.
Cody/Skondreag 58:40
Would you consider these ‘essential’.
DM Will
Essential oil?
(laughing)
Ike/Rafael
I didn’t even see that coming.
DM Will
Tyson. I can't remember which potions are the ones that are one D6 but take two D6 and then add that to your health. You guys could also do a short rest to get health back.
Ike/Rafael
I took no damage because, if you recall, I was behind the bar.
Cody/Skondreag
I'm just honestly, I'm up a little concerned about the two automatons that are coming into town. So, I'm thinking more of the defensive side than really even the healing side. I just happen to be here and he is a really big guy, and I need him alive.
DM Will
I will say that if you wanted… if you're trying to get the stuff you have to go get it.
Cody/Skondreag
So we’re at the market and I'm actually more patient to the defensive than the healing side.
Ike/Rafael
The only way we're going to… we need to get up high on a building and try to douse those and then light them... (smacking noise) Those are some really good mouth noises....get up high and douse them and stuff and possibly maybe get some sort of a trap if they walk into or something. if they have to come up the path... maybe roll barrels down the hill or something. That always works. I don’t know if they can jump.
Cody/Skondreag
I really don’t think this is Donkey Kong.
Ike/Rafael
We really don’t know what they look like so that super helps.
Rafael/Ike
Where’s Vanessa we can go talk to her. You pulled me away, I could have talked to her.
Skondreag/Cody
I’ll tell you this…
Cody/Skondreag
And I point to my…
Rafael/Ike
I could have talked to Vanessa and figured out what they look like.
DM Will
Okay, so as you walk out. Are you walking back over to the bar?
All 1:00:31
Yes.
DM Will
Then as you walk out of the market there's a man who's just kind of slumped up against the side of the building. It is pretty clear that he was waiting there for you but he's just like obviously, really, really, drunk. He is just smashed. Even though right now it's probably like noon, he is just gone.
Cody/Skondreag
I go…
Skondreag/Cody
Hey Eddy. What's up? How's it going man?
Comsheasmach/DM Will
Who the hell is Eddy?
Skondreag/Cody
Well that was the name you used last night when we’re playing Gearworks.
Comsheasmach/DM Will
You were doing what?
Skondreag/Cody
Yeah, we were playing cards.
Rafael/Ike
What?
Skondreag/Cody
Classic game, I’d love to teach in later. This guy went by Eddy.
(Comsheasmach is babbling)
Rafael/Ike
Eddy, is that you?
Comsheasmach/DM Will
No, my name is Comsheasmach. You can call me Comsmay.
DM Will
He starts leaning to the side.
Skondreag/Cody
Well we’re going to continue on.
DM Will
You try to move past him but he moves into your way and he's like…
Comsheasmach/DM Will
(slurred drunken speech) I just had to... I had stopped by, had to stop by, because they said that there was new blood. And you guys... you're in town now.
Rafael/Ike
We are in town. Can I get you anything?
DM Will
He lays his hands on your shoulders and he's like…
Ike/Rafael
I do, as a reactionary move, I like move my shoulder out of the way.
DM Will 1:02:09
He like falls a little bit, but embraces you as he falls
Rafael/Ike
Eww. Yeah, Hi.
Comsheasmach/DM Will
You…
Rafael/Ike
You smell delicious.
Comsheasmach/DM Will
...seem like you're strong.
Rafael/Ike
Well, I guess, I am.
Toa/Tyson
Do you think if we put a match near his mouth he’ll breathe fire?
Rafael/Ike
Probably. You know…
Cody/Skondreag
Should we roll and…
(laughing)
DM Will
You stare for a moment and he looks at you, and clearly you see that he can't remember who you are and then he's like…
Comsheasmach/DM Will
I heard that there was new blood in town…
Rafael/Ike
There was! They are down at the market.
Comsheasmach/DM Will
Victoria! Where’s the new blood?
DM Will
He is just shouting at no one right now.
Skondreag/Cody
Hey, where would this new blood find Victoria?
Comsheasmach/DM Will
I haven’t seen Victory in...how long?
Ike/Rafael
Sidequest acquired.
(laughing)
Comsheasmach/DM Will
I was going to... have you seen Victoria?
Skondreag/Cody
I was actually looking for her.
Comsheasmach/DM Will 1:03:17
Victoria.
Skondreag/Cody
Yeah, have you seen her.
Rafael/Ike
She had a secret she was going to tell us.
DM Will
He kind of leans back…
Skondreag/Cody
I was told to find Cornsway.
(laughing)
Ike/Rafael
That was Victoria's Secret.
DM Will
Cornsway?
(laughing)
Ike/Rafael
That really simmered on the stove for a little bit.
(laughing)
DM Will
He looks at you and he’s like…
Comsheasmach/DM Will
You know Victoria too?
Skondreag/Cody
Yeah, we go way back.
Comsheasmach/DM Will
How...how... do you know Victoria? (a little anger in voice)
Skondreag/Cody
That’s a long story and you don't have the mental capacity for it.
Comsheasmach/DM Will
Tell me right now!
DM Will
And he starts moving toward you…
Ike/Rafael
I put my hand on his shoulder and cast the friend cantrip on him.
DM Will
As you you put your hand on his shoulder your hand disappears. Like from existence for a moment.
Rafael/Ike
Neat! Yo! Not like that!
DM Will 1:04:04
And he steps back and your hand is back but it’s soft like a teddy bear’s arm.
Ike/Rafael
Is it funny? Do I have a bone?
DM Will
No. It’s legitimately…
Ike/Rafael
I slap Toa.
DM Will
(to Toa) You feel a teddy bear slap you in the face and now he is…
Ike/Rafael
And I caress his cheek.
Tyson/Toa
Reactionary, I slap him upside the face.
DM Will
You slap him (Rafael)?
Tyson/Toa
Uh huh.
Ike/Rafael
I’m going to take real damage. (laughing) I’m totally going to take damage.
DM Will
Go ahead and roll for attack.
Tyson/Toa
Oh, gosh.
Ike/Rafael
You ass.
Tyson/Toa
Freakin’ teddy bear. (rolls) I roll a 10.
Ike/Rafael
13, I’m good.
DM Will
So at this point…
Rafael/Ike
Careful with those big guy. Mind the jokey joke.
DM Will
So he falls back a little bit and now he's like solely focused on you and he's like…
Comsheasmach/DM Will
You tell me where she is right now.
Cody/Skondreag
And I kind of take a second and assess the situation. Is there any magical aura going on like is there anything that I would know?
DM Will
You’re gunna try and like sense magic? Yeah, you have to roll for that.
Cody/Skondreag 1:05:19
I’m actually not going to detect magic. I’m just trying to figure... I just watched my friend’s hand go through a body…
DM Will
Judging by that,
Ike/Rafael
I'm like now like petting my face with my teddy bear hand.
(laughing)
Ike/Skondreag
I’m looking at it and I'm like looking down below my belt and looking at the hand again and I'm like I shaved my legs. No, I’m not doing that..
(laughing)
DM Will
Judging by what you just saw you would say that something magical is happening here.
Cody/Skondreag
Normally I think I feel like I would take a step forward and really like say the opposite right back at him, I'm looking for Victorian you were going to tell me where she's at…but I’m a little hesitant at this point.
DM Will
At this moment he stumbles but he catches himself and he stands up straight and then you feel the air kind of start to get hot around you (sounds of flames) and planks of wood are starting to shake a little bit and then like weird shit starts happening, like planks of wood turning into like mushrooms and then they turn into like teddy bears, and they just keep turning into random things and he like clenches his fists and he's getting ready to punch you but as he goes, his drunkenness gets the better of him and he just passes out and falls onto the ground and then everything is back to normal including your hand.
Cody/Skondreag
So he's passed out right now.
Rafael/Ike
Ah, dang it.
DM Will
Yeah, he’s on the ground.
Cody/Skondreag
I just pilfer his pockets.
DM Will
You try and pilfer his pockets?
Cody/Skondreag
Yes.
DM Will
Okay the moment you touch his body your hands turn into crab claws.
Cody/Skondreag 1:06:59
I still continue.
(laughing)
DM Will
The longer you touch him the transformation continues to move up your arm.
Cody/Skondreag
So I know have two crabby arms.
DM Will
Yeah, and he is still touching you.
Cody/Skondreag
I move my hands back.
DM Will
The moment you stop touching him they turn back into hands.
Tyson/Toa
So theoretically, could we take his pants off and take the things inside of them.
DM Will
I mean, you can try.
Tyson/Toa
I’m not…
Ike/Rafael
You said it bro, don’t look at me…
Tyson/Toa
I’m not going to do it. I’m a monk, I don’t have any reason….
Ike/Rafael
I use my mage hand and try to get to his pockets.
DM Will
Your mage hand turns into a lightning bolt.
Ike/Rafael
It’s invisible. visible so,..
DM Will
It turns into something else.
Cody/Skondreag
Hold on, this guy's name is corn corn…
DM Will
His name is Comsheasmach.
Cody/Skondreag
Comsheasmach, Comsheasmach, Comsheasmach.
Ike/Rafael
Com smay smok.
Cody/Skondreag
Cornswayschmuck. He is something trippy we have never encountered.
Ike/Rafael
Some transmutation magic or something...
Skondreag/Cody 1:08:03
We probably need to go find Victoria.
Rafael/Ike
Vanessa. She might know Comschway.
Skondreag/Cody
Is there anyone else around us?
DM Will
No, it’s just like…
Ike/Rafael
I yell fire. I scream fire at the top of my lungs.
Rafael/Ike
Fire! Fire!
(laughing)
DM Will
Move away from the mic, My ears! Yeah, you see Vanessa start running out of the bar.
(Randy)/Rafael/Ike
Oh Vanessa, thank heavens, see, no one seems to take me seriously unless I yell fire.So I had to say that. Do you know this guy?
DM Will
She looks at you and she's like…
Vanessa/DM Will
Do I know who?
(Randy)/Rafael/Ike
Oooh boy.
Skondreag/Cody
Do we know this guy?
(Randy)/Rafael/Ike
If I was to say that there's a person laying in front of us right here. The body right here that I'm pointing at... the area that I'm pointing...is there a body?
DM Will
She looks down, she doesn't see anything. You look down you don't see anything.
(Randy)/Rafael/Ike
(Peter Griffen laugh) I'm just joshing.
Ike/Rafael
And I put like a super serious face on and look at the other guys.
Toa/Tyson
Did you put anything in my drink earlier? Is that what’s happened…
Rafael/Ike
He’s gone. What do you think Skondgeag, got any magic thinking up there. It’s kind of your realm
Cody/Skondreag
I was wondering if any of you put Comschway in your background story but I’m going to go forward from there.
(Randy)/Rafael/Ike 1:09:22
I don’t have Comshway (singing about Comshway and Feng Shui)
Cody/Skondreag
I just look at him and say…
Skondreag/Cody
Ya know Vanessa, he's not worth your time.
Vanessa/DM Will
Who are you talking about?
Cody/Skondreag
(to Rafael) I don’t remember your name dude.
Vanessa/DM Will
Oh, you’re talking about Rafael.
Ike/Rafael
I don’t think I’ve said my name.
DM Will
Oh, she doesn’t know that because you said your name was Randy? So she said...
Vanessa/DM Will
Oh, you’re talking about Randy. Where’s the fire? Did the automatons....
(Randy)/Rafael/Ike
No, we put it out. They were here but we kicked their butts once and they ran away.
Cody/Skondreag
So what direction did these automatons…
Vanessa/DM Will
Of course, they came right from the trail. So if you go outside and down, if you go to the tavern and take a right, the trail leads straight down to where the pirates have been spending their time.
Skondreag/Cody
Okay, that is good to know. Is there any other sort of flammable resources we might be able to acquire?
Ike/Rafael
Whiskey drinks.
Vanessa/DM Will
Other than the wood and anything you might have found in the market over there. I don’t think we have anything else.
Skondreag/Cody
How much time since the last time you saw one of those bird things? How much time went between the bird and them coming?
Vanessa/DM Will
Well, I'm honestly confused because last time it was almost immediate.
Skondreag/Cody
Great. Cuz we’ve been searching for an hour or two.
Rafael/Ike
Couldn’t have been that long.
Skondreag/Cody 1:10:56
It was.
Cody/Skondreag
It was, He (Will) said it. So we don't have a whole lot of time to set up a…
Rafael/Ike
I say we go grab some whiskey bottles and make some Molotov cocktails.
DM Will
Do you guys know how to make molotov cocktails?
Ike/Rafael
It’s fire, it’s a normal thing.
DM Will
Alright,
Ike/Rafael
You want me to roll for Molotov cocktails?
DM Will
Do it.
Ike/Rafael
No, because I won't get ‘em.
(laughing)
Ike/Rafael
(rolls) 12!
Cody/Skondreag
We got ‘em.
DM Will
Sure. You can let go in there and out of the alcohols that are left, that aren't shattered on the floor, you can find like one or two bottles that would work for Molotov cocktails.
Cody/Skondreag
Okay, with that then, I proposed we start towards the trail and see if there’s a trap. With you as bait.
Ike/Rafael
I will go. Oh, I have bait clothes, can I put them on? Would you like to see that?
Cody/Skondreag
I would like to see your bait clothes.
Ike/Rafael
I immediately sprint into the bar.
DM Will
As you do run away Vanessa is like…
Vanessa/DM Will
What is he baiting?
Ike/Rafael
I’m the master!
Tyson/Toa
I was going to say that he’s the master.
(laughing)
Ike/Rafael 1:12:18
And when I come back out, you see that my flowy pants have been cut very high to show a revealing, large amount of my thigh, the v-neck that I was wearing is a much deeper V, and I have combed my hair back.
Cody/Skondreag
So you pretty much cut a v in your PT clothes?
Ike/Rafael
No, it was already a v-neck but it's now in deeper v. And then I come back out.
Tyson/Toa
How deep?
Cody/Skondreag
Like almost belly button deep.
DM Will
Vanessa looks over. She glances at you and then glances away and like…
Vanessa/DM Will
Ohh (disgust)
Ike/Rafael
That’s normal.
(laughing)
Skondreag/Cody
Well Vanessa, I don’t have anything heroic to say, but keep the people safe and we're going that way.
Cody/Skondreag
And I point towards the trail and start walking.
DM Will
As you guys walk the town like past the tavern, you don't even know how you missed this, but the moment you pass the tavern, buildings are burned on both sides to the ground. There's nothing left. As you approach the trail, it starts going downhill and you can tell the cliffs that you are on and next to, goes all the way down to the base of them so you walk for a few minutes. You then come upon a small garden that has been left for a very, very long time. At this point. You come up on this garden and you pass through these nice shrubs on both sides and then you see there's this little stone trail that leads up to a fountain, that is actually still running. And on the fountain there's these two angel figures. They have these little horns in their mouths and then they have one leg planted and then they have their two legs wrapped around each other so that they are supporting each other up while they're leaning forward. And then there's little trails that move to the left and to the right, but on the right hand side there's this massive, massive shrubbery. There's no way that you could pass over it. On the left side there's this huge cliff side with just vines growing up it. Directly in front of you see another one of those massive shrubberies. In the middle there is a gate that is made of this incredibly ornate metal and to know anything more you will have to perceive it.
Ike/Rafael 1:15:01
I want to know, I'm going to roll on an investigation I guess. Roll on the fountain.
DM Will
Ok.
Ike/Rafael
(rolls) That’s a natural 20.
DM Will
Alright, you walk up to the fountain and you see it is still running, which is odd to you because the power should be out, but apparently in this area there's still enough to to have that fountain run. Then inside the fountain itself are a lot of little coins…
Ike/Rafael
I’m going to take those coins. You want to finish describing it first?
DM Will
Okay, I will describe it first and then let you... It is like a 3-tier fountain, so it's got the base, where the water sits. It's got the next part of the fountain that has some water coming out and then it spits out of there. It then comes back down into the main base and then there’s the third tier, where it's got the two angels with the horns, that actually have a little bit of water coming out of the horns as well.
Ike/Rafael
Angels with horns (scoffing). Oh, angels with trumpets.
DM Will
You see the angels are, with a roll of 20, the angels do look a little bit odd to you. Where usually would see a statue would just be made of stone these two appear to be made of metal and their joints to have lines. It looks like if they wanted to move they could. As you get into the fountain and start rummaging through the coins, you've never seen coins like these before. there are three varying sizes of coins, a really small, medium, and bigger, but they're incredibly rusted over they are really rough. They are like broken down coins.
Ike/Rafael
What materials are coins made out of?
DM Will
You can't tell just by looks. They are so old you would have to work on them...
Ike/Rafael
I’m going to do like two things, I’m going to throw those coins back at the fountain and see if there's anything going to happen?
DM Will
Nope.
Ike/Rafael
I'm going to take one of my own coins...If that's the money they've been here for.... one of my own coins in the fountain to see if anything happens.
DM Will
Nothing happens.
Ike/Rafael
Son of a biscuit! I thought something really cool was going to happen.
Cody/Skondreag 1:17:21
I’m going to reach my hand in and get the coin he just threw.
(laughing)
Ike/Rafael
Yeah, I guess nothing if that’s the…
DM Will
So because you rolled the natural 20 on perception, I'll also talk about the rest of this area. You see the shrubs in front of you are really tall green shrubs and above the gate through these two little silver points. The gate itself is made of this incredible worked metal into this gate. It actually has S.O.T. crafted into the workings and the twistings of this this beautiful metal. Tyson you actually recognize a lot of this because the art almost matches what your people do with their tribal tattoos. The rest of this area...there's some vines that are clinging to the cliff side. There's a little pedestal to the right past where the cement path goes. To the right there's a small pedestal with nothing on it, and then there's a trail that leads off into nothing next to the cliff side.
Ike/Rafael
The concrete trail goes up the cliffside or what? Is this like... there's two big cliffs with a pass down the middle? I'm kind of confused.
DM Will
There’s a huge shrubbery and then a cliff.
Ike/Rafael
We’re walking on a path in the middle?
DM Will
Yes.
Ike/Rafael
Gotcha. And the very end of the path is blocked by another shrubbery with a gate?
DM Will
Yes.
Ike/Rafael
Like a dead end?
DM Will
Well, it's a gate.
Tyson/Toa
I would like to further investigate the gate.
DM Will
As you approach the gates you hear a skittering little sound and the two spikes that were up at the top are no longer there. You hear a voice like right next to your head and it's like…
Eddie/DM Will
I can't believe it, another one of the Seekers.
Toa/Tyson
What are you talking about? Who said that?
DM Will 1:19:42
As you look over you see this tiny little metallic figure sitting on your shoulder looking at you and then on the other side you hear another one go…
Percival/DM Will
Oh, daft! He's not another one of the Seekers.
Toa/Tyson
What is going on here?
DM Will
And that's where we're going to end this episode.
Ike/Rafael
Nice.
Tyson/Toa
Fandabby dosey boys. Yea!
Cody/Skondreag
I am so freaking confused.
DM Will
Really?
Cody/Skondreag
I'll save some for the recording. In my head I’m going...we saw some trippy dude turned your wing wang...into a beaver…
Tyson/Toa
I got two little dudes on my shoulder right now.
Ike/Rafael
I was hoping I could keep my arm.
(laughing)
(Ending music)
Will
Today in Adventuring is an actual play D&D 5e podcast. For all business-related inquiries, please send an email to tiadvpodcast@gmail.com - that's t. i. a. d. v. podcast @ gmail.com. I'm Will, the DM of the show. We have Tyson Kohl playing Toa Tagata, Ike Maytum playing Rafael Grendtich, and Cody playing Skondreag the Forgotten. Thank you for listening and tune-in next time to see what the adventures of tomorrow will bring.
End
1:21:39