Interview with Amber Rae: When Staying In A Safe Relationship Hurts You More Than Leaving

A Little Help For Our Friends

A Little Help For Our Friends
Interview with Amber Rae: When Staying In A Safe Relationship Hurts You More Than Leaving
Jul 30, 2025 Season 5 Episode 152
Jacqueline Trumbull and Kibby McMahon

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What happens when you look into a stranger's eyes and suddenly realize what's been missing from your marriage all along? In this episode, bestselling author Amber Rae joins us to share her transformative journey from a nine-year relationship that checked all the boxes on paper but lacked true intimacy and connection.

Amber's story challenges our conventional understanding of commitment, revealing how we can unknowingly convince ourselves that relationships are working when essential needs remain unmet. "I didn't know I was pretending," she reflects, describing how she repeatedly tried to fix her marriage through therapy, self-help books, and doubting herself. The wake-up call came unexpectedly when she experienced an electric yet calm connection with a stranger that made her question everything.

We talk about what it's like to question your relationship or feel stuck between staying and leaving.  Amber explores our patterns – whether we tend to leave too quickly or stay too long out of fear or people-pleasing – and provides permission to honor our authentic needs.

Beyond relationship insights, Amber shares her process of writing her new memoir "Lovable," describing how she created a "brave draft" by writing as if no one would read it. This approach to truth-telling mirrors what's needed in our relationships: the courage to see and speak our truths before considering how they'll be received.

Whether you're questioning your current relationship, healing from a past one, or simply curious about authentic connection, this conversation offers both validation and a framework for honest exploration. If you need more support in this journey, join our KulaMind Community for more relationship tools and connection with others walking similar paths. 50% discount off the first month if you sign up now!

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