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Ever felt like your worth depends on how useful you are to other people? Turning the big 4-0 pushed me to confront a lifelong habit of people pleasing. In this episode, I talk about people pleasing: how it took root in chaos, hid behind “being nice,” and quietly drained my energy, confidence, and joy. I unpack what research says about what "people pleasing" is, how chronic pleasing links to mental health issues, and why so many of us end up orbiting charismatic "takers" who love the spotlight while we shrink to keep them happy.

I dig into the "Echo- Narcissus Syndrome": the dynamic between a people-pleaser and a narcissist. I talk about my own tendency to fall into the Echo-Narcissus Syndrome and how it's destroyed my relationships in the past. Then I walk through the practical, evidence-based strategies for breaking free of this syndrome. I'm learning to receiving without guilt, choosing mutual relationships over one-way giving, and navigating holiday pressures without abandoning myself. 

If you also find yourself falling into toxic dynamics where you give and give and give while losing yourself, then this episode is for you. Together, we can figure out how to honor our empathy & generosity without feeling used. 

Resources:

• Moral-Jiménez, M. D. L. V., & Mena-Baumann, A. (2024). Emotional Dependence and Narcissism in Couple Relationships: Echo and Narcissus Syndrome. Behavioral Sciences, 14(12), 1190.

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