The Visionary Woman Podcast
The Visionary Woman Podcast
Find Your Voice: Season 1 Finale (with Special Guest Eunice Johnson-Strickland)
Imagine the serenity of a well-cultivated home, the strength in setting boundaries, and the triumph of overcoming setbacks. This is what our exceptional guest, Eunice Johnson Strickland, embodies and shares in our conversation on today’s episode.
A military veteran, trusted realtor, captivating public speaker, and compassionate life coach, Eunice walks us through her journey, opening up about how she discovered balance within her multifaceted life and how that has impacted her dreams and aspirations.
Grounding is more than a buzzword; it's a lifestyle that sets the tone for how we interact with the world and ourselves. Eunice enlightens us on this journey as she reveals the importance of self-awareness and the often undervalued skill of teaching others how to treat us. And for anyone who has ever questioned the wisdom in taking risks or needed reassurance in the face of setbacks, Eunice shares her personal experiences, laying out practical advice and instilling the courage needed to navigate these challenges.
We discuss the necessity of self-reflection by exploring our past, emotions, and relationships. We even touch on the art of distinguishing between friends, acquaintances, and associates, and the importance of learning to trust ourselves. And as a cherry on top, we share our lessons on juggling tasks, prioritizing family time, and creating lasting memories, painting a vivid picture of how balance can exist amidst the chaos.
Join the conversation as we journey through the enlightening lessons and highlights of the season 1 experience at the Visionary Woman Podcast!
Thank you all for a wonderful beginning!
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Don't put your dreams to bed. You've done that enough. Now it's time to stir them up. This is your friend and host, Kirstie Fleur, with the Visionary Woman podcast, and I love resourcing the Visionary Woman, the creative, the artist, the business owner, the risk taker, and on this show we will talk about what it means to get out of your own way and take your dreams to the next level. Join the conversation. Hi, I'm your host, Kirstie Fleur. Thank you for joining us today on the Visionary Woman podcast. Today we are going to be recapping the last 12 episodes on the Visionary Woman podcast. I hope you've been listening in and so today joining me show I have Eunice Johnson Strickland.
Kirstie :Eunice is a dedicated professional with a rich and diverse background. She's served proudly in the military for 25 years. She's been able to hone her expertise in finance, human resources, logistics, and she demonstrates exceptional leadership and organizational skills. She holds a Bachelor of Science in Chemistry from Graham and State University, a testament to her commitment to education and intellectual growth. Additionally, Eunice earned an MBA from University of Phoenix, further solidifying her expertise in business and management. During her military career she was a chemist what, and now excels as a trusted realtor, captivating public speaker, compassionate life coach and dedicated mentor with a passion for guiding individuals toward their fullest potential, she brings a unique blend of wisdom and insight into every interaction. Eunice's diverse experiences have shaped her into a dynamic speaker, drawing from her military career and discipline nurturing and her nurturing spirit to inspire others.
Kirstie :Eunice is also a loving mother of three children, and she understands the importance of balance and brings a unique perspective to her motivational tasks. As the youngest of five siblings, she values the importance of family bonds. So, beyond her professional endeavors, she finds solace in the joy of gardening and using the earth as her canvas for creativity. She's equally adept in the kitchen and creating delectable dishes that reflect her love for culinary arts. And, above all, she cherishes spending precious moments with her kids, creating lasting memories that will be cherished for a lifetime. So her story is one that you're going to hear in a minute of resilience and determination and the ability to encourage and empower individuals in their own journey. So Eunice is a good friend of mine. Thank you for joining the show with us today, Eunice. What's up? Who?
Eunice :Is that woman you introduced? Don't meet her.
Kirstie :I know, right, I know every time you read your own, you hear your own bio. You're like is that me? She's amazing, she's amazing, yes, yes. So we are super grateful to have you on the show and encouraging our audience, our listeners, these visionary women. So, on the past 12 episodes, we've talked about a number of things. We've talked about embracing creativity, overcoming adversity, foraging sustainable life and business partnerships. We even had an IP lawyer come on and talk to us about her journey and how she created the ecosystem, or a group of women that helps with all the wholeness and wellness things that she's a part of. She found that that was a huge part of wellness also.
Kirstie :So women are finding ways to tackle the roadblocks, to pursue their dreams and passions, and so that's what we like to talk about here how we can get beyond that, how we can stay on our visionary journey, because if you're a visionary woman, you know that a lot of times you can get in your own way. So we're going to talk about, we're going to discuss how to cultivate a place called home despite some of those roadblocks and setbacks. But first, Eunice, we want to hear. Even though we heard this amazing bio, we want to hear about you and what you have going on now and all the fun things.
Eunice :Wow. So first of all, primarily first is always family first. So right now I am just doing real estate and all the things family, and so the thing that I love about cultivating and helping families get their homes is because I just believe that that's the origin, like if you have the perfect home to cultivate the life that you dreamed of, then it can help you navigate to other endeavors, because buying a house is huge. So I have all the things with three kids, I have somebody who is in soccer, I have somebody who is practicing for a talent show and doing voice lessons and I have somebody who is in a musical. So every night they're after school it's like do you have your snack? Did you get your extra lunch? I'm cooking dinner in between. So in this season of my life it is catering to every age group that's living in this house, which are my tiny humans, and cultivating and nurturing relationships and helping and encouraging people to ultimately reach their goal, which is one of the biggest purchases they'll ever make is their home.
Kirstie :Wow, I absolutely love that. One of the things that I can actually give credit to Eunice is the fact that she's this is the truth, like she really does spend this time cultivating her family, pouring into her kids, pouring into, like, what is right in front of her, and that is something that I have really been. Of course, as my family is growing I have a new baby now, so I thought about a lot how do I cultivate home? How do I stay focused on what is right in front of me? My feet right in front of me, what does that look like? And why do we have such a hard time in this generation of doing it?
Kirstie :Because, especially, you got to think about it we're visionary women. So what are we? We're thinking far into the future of like. Okay, this is what I see myself as. So you're constantly pivoting, we're constantly evolving and changing, and it is so easy if you don't have that place of security, like we're calling it a home, a physical home or just like your place where you're grounded at, you can just kind of be all over the place, and I love it.
Kirstie :I'm sorry. Yeah, no, I love that you said you can. You can? You know you see that in the home process, the home buying process with people like being able to give them that space where they can have an experience as a family.
Eunice :Yeah, and also like I had to learn and I continuously have to be intentional, to give myself grace and to be okay when everything's not perfect. I went in the beginning. My concept of motherhood was the food has to be piping hot, they have to have all the colors of the rainbow, they have to have three sides. Got to have some type of bread or grain?
Eunice :Did we have milk, calcium, all of the things? The house has to be perfect and I was making everybody miserable because I had a concept versus understanding and being okay with what works for us right now, because I think what I was confusing was seasons. I was confusing my seasons. There was a season where I had everything together and the house was okay. But now this is not a museum, this is home, this is love. So I need to be okay with how is life functioning for me now, like, okay, I have toys everywhere. I have weapons of mass destruction everywhere, I have Nerf guns because I have a son and I'm understanding all of these.
Eunice :Son, I have a daughter that's artistic, so she loves to paint, she likes fashion, so I'm probably going to have 10 outfits on the floor and she wears uniforms every day. So why are you going through different types of uniform? Is either khaki or blue? Come on, let's make a decision. And then you have somebody else. That's very, very calculated and you know what Kids just want to eat, they want to hug, they want to feel loved, they want to feel seen. That's right. Just you know like they want to. What is what is valuable in in this season? And not only that. My personal mantra that I live by is be the kids, be the mom that my children will remember.
Kirstie :So will they?
Eunice :Remember me yelling all the time? Will they remember me snatching them up? That allowed them to make a mistake because I wanted to present my life and my children and all of their school projects perfect, not allow them to make any mistakes, take over things, try to present it, but that was actually crippling them and really making them codependent versus independent. And so all the things in this season of my life and seasons can be five years, a season can be three years, a season can be 10 years, but in that season when you're there, just be there and be present and your kids will teach you and they will teach you what's important. They will keep you fun, they will keep you flexible and keep you moving forward and keep you young too, just like joy, joy.
Kirstie :And also too.
Eunice :What I learned as a visionary woman is I needed to take time and find a source, because if you don't have a source or a grounding place, then you will be all over the place and it will be un-calculated. So what that looked like for me is okay. Well, I have six clients under contract, I have buyers getting approved, I have homes coming on the market getting listed. When do I have time to have a vision? When do I have time to be still and be quiet? Well, at that time I began to backwards plan. And what I mean by backwards plan is if I wake up at 5.50 to get the kids up for six o'clock every morning, then at that point, if 5.50 is the time for me to start moving around to get the kids up, I need to be up at 5.30.
Eunice :I need to be up at 5.20 to have them to sit still to look at my calendars, whatever I'm doing to ground myself, whatever I'm doing to journal, to meditate. And how is today supposed to go for me? And we have a master calendar. If it's not on the calendar, it doesn't exist.
Kirstie :Listen, if it's not on the calendar, in my life it's absolutely not happening. Like, oh, we were supposed to do this today. It's not on the calendar, it's not happening, it's gotta be on the calendar. I love that you keep using the word grounded. I woke up a couple of nights ago and I wrote in my notes grounded. And then I automatically start thinking about back when I was in college and I worked at American Airlines and I was like why would they ground flights? Like, why do we do that? Like, why did flights come in, planes come in, and why do they have to be grounded? And I'm like, oh, the plane had to be grounded from its journey because it had maintenance issues, technical problem or it needed to have something like recharge with its back battery, all the things, whatever that needs to happen on that tarmac out there. And so I was like, okay, if I'm the plane and I feel like in moments I'm being grounded, it's not like a punishment per se, but it is an adjustment it's like I need to come back in, be recentered and grounded so that I can have a safe journey and a safe flight. And so you keep using that word grounded, like it hit me the other day and I was like that's a thing, like we need that as women. We have all these, all those things you just mentioned. I got food here, I got this one, I got to go to this practice, we got this, we got all these things or whatever. You have to have that grounding, that place, that, even if it's not a place, even if it's like this mantra, this mindset that you have, that you come back to every day, like you're like I got to get up, I have to meditate. You got to pray, whatever your flow, your thing, your practices, I got to do this because it grounds my day.
Kirstie :My thing is walking. Like when I get up in the morning, I just have a lot of energy. So when I get up in the morning, I got to walk. You know, sometimes I just walk and I look up and I'm like, oh, I walked for three miles. I'm not doing it on purpose, guys, I'm not that fit.
Kirstie :I do it because I'm doing it, because it is the way that I keep my mind grounded and centered, Like it's a place where I can think the baby is in her stroller, she's asleep or looking at trees, and you know, I'm getting to be there in that moment. So in that moment I'm like, okay, I see the leaves, I see the trees here, and then I think, oh, wow, I've always been in a hurry, you know like so. Then now thoughts. You know, now I've made space. So now real thoughts, you know, real introspection starts happening. I'm like, okay, why have I always been in a hurry? Because I'm always trying to. Am I always trying to escape something? You know? So you have these moments where, okay, if I don't ground myself, then I don't get this self-awareness so that I can work on things.
Eunice :Yeah, because and I love it.
Eunice :And I love being grounded and centering myself and living by what my truth is and also, too, setting boundaries. I remember, I remember I was singing on the worship team at church, volunteering in the Women's Ministry at church, still had three kids, I was nursing baby brother, I was doing real estate and my mom was progressing in her Parkinson's disease. So I was doing all of the things and at that time I was still in the military. This was just really like maybe three years ago, still in the military, and I began to feel overwhelmed because what I realized is being a person who gets things done, people will call on you because they know that you will show up.
Eunice :But there had to be a time once again, I'll say season that I had to begin to detach myself because I was being pulled and not grounded myself, but being all things to all people, showing up for everybody and not myself. So what I was being shown in my personal life as I spent time with God was that you're doing too much. I didn't say that you needed to pause forever, but you need to pause for right now, because I need you to come back to a center and I need to refocus you for a season, because it's really about a world perspective. Here you're thinking about oh my gosh, you know, I have my pride set in.
Eunice :I'm like oh, I'm not going to be on the stage, I'm not going to be singing, I'm not going to be helping people. I love women, I love singing.
Kirstie :I love doing the call yeah, Ego does it. Ego is like yeah, what? What are they going to say?
Eunice :I'm not going to be there. What are they going to say? But the Holy Spirit was showing me that you are so concerned about taking a five-year break when I have 30 years of prosperity and other good things that I need to reposition you for. You know, especially it can be very hard when you do a lot of things. Well, yeah, yeah, that's a hard place to be, because you wonder am I doing the correct thing in this season, the thing that I'm good at? Am I being purposeful in this season, right now, with the particular gift or talent that I have? Because if you use the right talent or gift in the wrong season, you will not prosper.
Kirstie :That's true. That's true. All of it is so crazy. It's all about alignment. And then that brings us right back to the piece of self-awareness, that groundedness. If you just keep going and you just keep building and you're just in this rat race of, okay, this is just what we do, this is just how we do it, this is just how the things work, and you don't take that moment To ground and center yourself, you might look up and be like, wait a minute, oh, this was. I'm in a season that is up. This is completely like weird. We're now I'm supposed to be transitioning into something else.
Kirstie :And, yeah, there's the pieces of it where it's like okay, what are the practical components? Like Businesses, business, and there are practical things, physical things that need to happen, but also, as visionaries of companies, you still have to be the person that's centered to the mission, the vision and where you're going. And it's so important, you know, for us as women, we have to make that time To pull all the things back in and say, okay, is this still going in the right direction? Because you might pause and look up and be like, what the heck am I doing? What? What am I doing? What have I been doing for the past year here, let me read, let me restructure, let me recenter and get back on on target one thing that I had to learn was to be okay with teaching people how to treat me.
Eunice :That's good, and I say that because when I first got into real estate, I would tell people I'm new to real estate?
Eunice :I'm not new to business, I'm just new to real estate, and so I Would answer the phone, shush my kids, walk away, answer my phone after hours. I had, I had no boundaries, and so now I have learned that I'm not all things to all people guess what? Nobody's awake at seven o'clock at night that I can do anything for you In regard to certain areas of real estate. So all that we can move. All that to nine o'clock tomorrow morning.
Kirstie :We could you know, that's right. And work is gonna be there work is always not going anywhere.
Eunice :And also to you know, people just want to be reassured that they are heard and they want you to follow through. That's, that's right. That's all. And what I say, too, is even though my voicemail is, it's God, family, real estate, I mean, I love all of those things. However, if you call me and it's dinner time, you're gonna get what you're getting. You don't throw a fit. You're gonna hear these Pots moving around because it's time to feed my family, you know and if we would all be honest with ourselves.
Eunice :We are more alike than we are not. That's right. We all want to be successful, we all want to raise children that are an asset to society, and we want to be the best representatives representatives other human being, as as as we can, the best representative of a good person, as as we can and we don't have to apologize for what that looks like for us in this season you have to apologize.
Kirstie :I love that all of that is you have clear boundaries, like you know. You have to, you know. I find you know, you know, of course we're women here and we're talking about this, but I find that men don't tend to struggle with the know of of their boundaries. As much as we do is women, because we're like, oh yeah, we could do a little bit more. Or okay, yeah, the neighbor, you know, brought this over and did this. So let me make sure that I I can't do, I can't, I can't return that favor right now. I can't do that. I have to do this, you know, and we can just be so like we got a, you know, we're just on that, that rat race on that wheel. So we have to constantly remind ourselves like I, like you're talking about, like we keep talking about.
Kirstie :You know, one of my things in boundaries is like turn my phone off. So sometimes, you know, I have a friend or a family and just like I messaged you at what time, whatever time the morning, did you get my message about this? And I'm like, oh no, obviously Right, you know, especially now, I mean, I have a newborn. Most definitely I didn't get your message, you know. So my phone is off or it's always on silent. You like what do you say? You message me sometime. You're like your phone is on, it stays on do not disturb mode. You know, I don't want to hear the notifications, I don't need all that. And so for me it's been keeping work at work. I'm like okay, these are my hours that I work, I'm at work. My people know this is the day that I don't work. When I'm at home at this time they're like they may still be sending things in our we use Monday as a project management software. They may still be sending things in there.
Kirstie :It's 9 o'clock, I'm here with the baby, rocking the baby or doing bedtime stuff, with whatever we're doing at home. I'm likely not gonna respond to the next day, unless it is like super urgent, the building is gonna burn down, which I doubt, and it never is. You're gonna get a response the next day and then. So home is at home. So when I'm at home, I want to be feet, I want to be in it, I want to be deep in what is happening at home. So if we're cooking, we're cooking. If we're watching movies together, if we're going for a family walk, I want to be completely inside of that moment with my people because, like you said, what mom are they gonna remember? Who are they gonna remember? Is my son and my daughter gonna be? Like Mom was always working.
Kirstie :You know, every time we saw her, she's up at 2 o'clock, she's up at midnight, she's. She's always working. She was always frustrated. One of the things Knox used to say is, whenever you wear these glasses, you, you seem angry. He said that because when I was, I was in school, I was in grad school at Wheaton and I used to always wear these glasses and he's so. He was see, whenever I put my glasses on and I'm doing my work at night, he's like you seem really frustrated when you put the glasses on. So he's like glasses in you. I'm not talking to you.
Eunice :When you got the glasses on, I see there's two things about when your business owner. Communication is key. I teach my children boundaries as well, and I'm open to letting them know when I have a bad day, when I'm sad, when I lost a deal, when a deal didn't go through. I even cried in front of my children because one thing is I, I had to break something. Generationally and before my mom passed away, we talked about this when I was younger. But she, she grew up in an era where you know she would say never let them see you sweat.
Eunice :You know like cry later, but this has to get done. Yes they were cruel, they were harsh. Well, I was a very emotional child so I struggled with Never let them see you sweat, because I cried all the time. I was very in touch with this doesn't feel good and I'm I'm going to cry. So over the years I developed that hardness and I am just now Going embarking on my wonderful second year therapy. Realize that it's okay to cry.
Kirstie :Yeah, celebrate that. You know I don't think enough people celebrate that. I love how you say like it was a celebration I'm embarking on, it's wonderful today. Oh my, we need a celebration for that. What are we talking about?
Eunice :Yes, yes. So it's like them seeing that your feelings is hurt, because I don't need them to know that you only cry as a kid. I need them to know that don't have bad days. And also, too, when you work for yourself, there's going to be times where I am going to have to work after hours. That's why you know, in in real estate, you get to make your own hours. But they also understand that there are sometimes that I am under a timeline and I'm going to need to get some more work done. Got it all day, that's. That's not an issue with them.
Eunice :However, it is up to me as a parent. I feel like it is what I get to do, because I'm very intentional about my words. What I get to do is I get to plan and make sure that, um, I have dinners prepared, that I have space for homework time and I have space for pick up time, because when you work for yourself, you it's also whatever vision you have. But I got into real estate, um, to be the mom that my children will remember. I got into real estate to pick up from the school and to do the homework and to be at the field trips. So I'm, I'm, that's where them. Yeah, yeah With my computer, but I'm everywhere. I've been on a field trip writing up a contract. I'm everywhere Because it's it's. It's called get the software, it's called download the software.
Kirstie :It's called make the template.
Eunice :So there is, there is a preparation when you are embarking and envisioning on a different season. I'm going into a season right now where I've never been before, where I'm going to have one person in soccer while another person is in dance, while another person Is about to be in the musical and when the musical is over they're going to go into track season. So this is a season for me where every child will be having an event and I may finally get to that point where I'm only maybe home two nights a week because everybody has some place to be, and I am mentally preparing myself for that.
Kirstie :I don't know how that's gonna work. It's like what is food gonna look, like, how we, how we eating, because we can't eat out every night. So what is prepping meals, all the things, yeah, so and I am.
Eunice :I am all of the things. Youtube I am. Hey, what can I? This morning I was looking at a video about making pancake mix in bulk, making cookie dough mix in bulk, making um muffin mix in bulk, because you have to think about like. I love To sit at the table, I love to talk about meals, I love to communicate about their day, because I learned how to speak and how to articulate my feelings at the dinner table. How was your day? What's what's goingo?
Eunice :How to? How do you, how are you feeling about life? What was the conversation on the school bus? And then you know I had during return. This is what I had going on in real estate today. I had a closing. I'm waiting on an appraisal.
Kirstie :Well, what is an?
Eunice :appraisal. Well, what does that mean? I
Eunice :actually break my children in my business, because I need them to understand that you can do all things, but also to um, just be mindful of not being afraid to try, because the the think about my family dynamic that my children get to see is my husband is a traditional and I'm non-traditional. My husband has been teaching for over 20 years. He goes to work every day and he comes home and he gets a paycheck every two weeks, whether he does something or not. However, if I don't work, I don't eat. So they get to see. They get to see if. Do I want to be a risk taker like mom, or do I want to be traditional like that and guess what? Either way is okay.
Kirstie :Yeah, yep, yep, that's crazy. These are the conversations that I have with Chauncey. I'm like so here's the deal. You go to work, it's one plus one equals two. I go to work, especially as a creative, it's like over the place and the way that I have to generate income and a flow and all the things completely different than the linear way. Like I said, you know, his corporate is one plus one equals two. When you put this in, you get this out and there's the check. Wow, right, right. So it's a little bit different for me, a little different.
Eunice :The heads different and you know the joy is like. I also wanted my children to understand. My education and my intellect is inherited. My parents, my mother was very educated. My grandmother, my great-grandmother. They were just naturally gifted in the all things wisdom and knowledge. So I'm grateful for that. But my children having the courage to try something different, to try something innovative, and the courage to fail and to try again or to pivot. So I need them to understand like it is okay to be hardcore for something and say you know what? I want to change my mind.
Eunice :So my, my intellect or my education comes actually from a place of trauma, honestly, yeah, so what happened was my dad died when I was 15 until he suffered four years with cancer and so we went from living this upper middle class life to my mom and I was just on the stroke of us Like it was bad. You know, like you got that one can in the pantry. Nobody want to eat it, but if it stays there, that means that we have some food in the house. We don't totally have any food. So I conjured up in my mind that I'm going to get associates, a certification, a bachelor's, a master's, because what I'm not going to ever do is not be able to make a dollar. I don't ever want to be in a position where something happens to my husband and I have to start my life over and I have nothing planned. I don't have a backup plan.
Eunice :Yeah, and so, with that being said, I got an associates in science. I have a phlebotomy certification. I got the Bachelor's in chemistry. I got the, the MBA. I got the certification to do real estate.
Kirstie :But you like, I can take your blood and sell you house. Which one? Which one are you needing today? Which one?
Eunice :Which one? Which one do you need? All of that is okay because I had to learn that if I would go back and look at myself 10, 20 years ago, I would tell myself to have several seats and to come down that.
Kirstie :It's gonna be okay, right, it's gonna be all right yeah.
Eunice :And I had to learn the power of a team. I had to learn there we go to have an ecosystem and to depend on people. Because what I did was trauma wanted me to encapsulate myself and make myself feel like I'm going to be the provider for all things. Eunice is never gonna be hungry again. Eunice is not going to.
Kirstie :Yeah, that's the trauma talking.
Eunice :Yeah, yeah, not going to be successful. You can miss me with that Like I'm going to be able to make my own way. And so what I had to realize why I celebrate therapy so much is that everybody is not for evil. You know, you do have a system of people if you allow your heart to be open to help you. But also what happens, life comes along, and when you feel like you are on this great path and you start to tell everybody what's happening, all of the nights that you've studied, for which they have no idea, then you realize that they are not for you. And so, once again, I said I tried to have an ecosystem, I tried to have a team, I tried to share, and then it's like boom.
Kirstie :Makes you put that wall up.
Eunice :Yeah, yeah, it makes you put that wall up. And so what I have learned once again with my source my source is God. I believe in Jesus, the Holy Spirit, all of the things I believe in, trying to spirit by spirit. So if we line up, we're good to go. But if I get that feeling that I'm accustomed to when I know things are not right, I'm moving on, and I'm moving on unapologetically. Yeah, because you have to learn how to have the hard conversations.
Kirstie :Yeah, a lot of times you got to be willing to build the right ecosystem to, if it's, you know, and even like in the spiritual sense, but even in just like a practical sense, if this doesn't work, if one plus one is not two in this, if it's not working out, it's just not working out.
Eunice :And this is okay.
Kirstie :And amicably, less amicably, less amicably, less amicably, less part ways. Let's move on, yeah, you know, and let's build the. I just was just saying the other day we don't match energy. I don't do it, I'm not into energy matching. Let me match this person's energy Now. This is the energy that I'm coming into the room with. This is the culture that we have here. This is, this is what we're doing. It's either you can get you can get with that or you you can't. You know, and if you can't, then don't have yourself misaligned with what we're doing here. You need to go do what you can do, right.
Kirstie :And all the way. Yeah, and it's, and it's okay. It's the same way in friendships, it's in marriage, it's in families and everything that you do.
Eunice :Right, and what they reminded me was of a life lesson that I'm teaching my 11 year old right now. I specifically said we're going to buy this pumpkin. The directions say in order to to decorate a good pumpkin, you have to use acrylic paint. My wonderful 11 year old says why? Of course, because in order to get it to look right. But she goes in and she gets the watercolors, she gets the fabric paints, she gets glue and that pumpkin look like it just is poor pumpkin. So I let her, I spent $5 and she learned a hard lesson, which you know what I'm going to do.
Eunice :When she comes home today, she'll have a fresh pumpkin and she'll have acrylic paint, and we are not going to enter your pumpkin into the contest because it looks definitely. It looks really, really bad. However, what you will do is you will know that I'm not going to give up and that I tried it my way because that's a lesson, right? It's like I want to try things my way, even though I'm given the right way, so that I won't waste time, waste energy. Let me show you what I use. Just do this and you'll be fine. But she's going to learn that lesson today. And guess what?
Eunice :We're not going to turn it in, but you're going to do that pumpkin and you're going to do it again right. You're going to be able to see. You know what I failed. I messed up, I didn't listen. But let me pivot, lift my head up, everything's going to be okay, but I'm going to have to do this again.
Kirstie :Yeah, I mean I'm teaching her at an early age how to overcome setbacks.
Eunice :You know how to pivot, how to get back up, how to keep going?
Kirstie :Yeah, absolutely. I don't know if you know the answer to this question or not. You should. It should just pop right up when I say this what do you think is the what's the word that you hear most often? It's one word that you hear most often that people say when they reference you you are so.
Eunice :Unique, unique.
Kirstie :Is she going to get this Eunice? Okay, yeah, that one.
Eunice :I'm definitely peculiar.
Kirstie :What? But the word I was looking for is real, because that is literally. Oh yeah, I was like she may or may not get this one, but I'm gonna ask because everybody says it, everybody, you know, if they know Eunice, if you've been around her, everybody's like she's just so real. She's just, you know, as real as it comes. But a lot of women have this struggle with their internal voice and they don't know what their voice is. They don't know really who they are on their journey. So, like, what has it been like? So for you, you're talking, we're having this conversation right now, and you say I'm sure of yourself.
Kirstie :In a lot of ways, it's like, okay, this is where I am, these are my boundaries, this is this. And so with people on the outside, when they look at me and people like me and you, they think, oh you, just this is just your DNA. You just woke up one day and this is just how you just this is just you figured it out. This is what you do, you know. But what's been your journey? You know, briefly, your journey about how you've become the truest version of yourself and found your voice. How have you been able to do that?
Eunice :That is a great question. One thing that I the first word that came to my mind is evolving, like it is the I-N-G Ever evolving, ever changing, ever. That didn't work. Let me try something else Forgiving myself, asking the hard questions, making sure that today's new mercies, forgetting about yesterday. Man, the biggest thing that has helped me was getting my emotions under control. I had to learn that I really didn't want to be I am one and hear me roar I really didn't want to be that. I had to learn like.
Eunice :I want to be independent and do and stay in my lane and be my own treblazer. However, I still want to come home and not take the trash out. I still want to be feminine. I still want to lay my husband's arm and be taken care of. So I honestly really have to. I do a lot of self-reflection and I live by list. I make lists and calendars and I feel like I feel like I'm rambling, but evolving and trying something new and sticking to what works is what you need to be comfortable with. If you are a Uber Eats mom, if you are a teen Uber mom, where you got Uber taking your child everywhere and all of the things you need to do that. You don't need to compare yourself to anyone, because life is a vapor and this little social media, these blue squares, will make you feel like you need to be a Klotzdale and you really, you really should be a man. You really should be a woman. I have learned to wow. This is a good one.
Kirstie :I had to learn the difference between my friends, acquaintances, comrades, constituents, associates employees, all the things yeah, we had an episode talking just about that, like knowing the difference, because for your mental health, for your business, for all of it, you have to know what category, what door they enter through and what place they belong in.
Eunice :And being okay even if you have one person. My mom would tell me often that you are a leader, get used to being alone. If you have one friend, you'll be lucky If you have one friend. And I think that we as women or I can say for myself, I used to try to find validation in every huge, every huge venture that I had, and I was such a people pleaser in a season of my life that I felt like I had to bring people along with me to say that, hey, we did this together and we got this together and I had to learn that it is okay to walk your own path, it is okay to even change your mind, it is okay to lay down and not be okay.
Eunice :Today, those are, I would say, going back to the basics. Like I said, it was very hard for me to cry, it was very hard for me to be sad, be happy, be just all of the emotions unsure, shocked, because sometimes the world can be so heavy and we're so in a space to try to prove the world wrong. I don't know why, like the world is not in my house, the world not paying my bills.
Kirstie :Please pay bills, the world ain't doing nothing. Which one would you like? The mortgage is a good one that part.
Eunice :I have to learn to shut my ears and to hear, be here and to see, then see. And when I begin to get my joy back, life began to be a little bit easier for me.
Kirstie :Yeah, that's so good, that's so good. I'm not sure what you're saying right now. I'm hearing several things, but one of the things is based on your upbringing, because that is a part of us period. No matter what we do, our upbringing informs some things about us. So you're upbringing with your mom letting you know leadership is like this, so you're teaching them leadership. So at a young age you're being taught boom, this is how leadership looks. Sometimes it's lonely. Here's this. Stand up in your own. This is who you are.
Kirstie :And so now, when people experience you, you know intuitively and instinctively what comes out is man. Eunice is so real. Man. Eunice is so unique. She's so you know.
Kirstie :She may be peculiar, like the other words that you mentioned, but you are yourself and you're not trying to be in anybody else's lane. Even though life is like had all of us or had you in some moments and stuff like that, you go back to that upbringing, you know. You go back to your rootedness. You're cool at your home and you're like okay, this is who I am. And then you re-center yourself and so that's how, like I'm listening, I'm like this is what people see about you, even with all the degrees, all the things, all the stuff. This is what they experience and what they are encountering, and you know why they even can feel like, okay, this person is a safe space for me to talk about this, or this is somebody I want to sell a home for me, or because she understands this, she understands why, or the valuable home and she's going to work with me, or however they go. So I think that's huge and there's something that our community really needs to understand going back and grabbing what things are good, you know Right.
Eunice :And I. It's about perspective and what your heart posture is. My heart posture is to work to live, not live to work.
Kirstie :Hello. We say, we say that all the time my husband, as much as he works and what he does and all that, he's like I don't this thing could shut down tomorrow. I'm not tied to it like that. His thing is, my identity is not connected to what I do. I do federal contracting. This is the work that I do. It provides for me to be able to do this for my family. My identity is not woven into that. If it fails tomorrow, who cares? I'll start a new one.
Kirstie :You know so. You know for us as women. You know sometimes we fight with it like I love the parts where you talk about I want to be feminine. I want to stand in my femininity. I'm a woman. I don't want to be battling against all the things. This is who I am. You know there's so much ease and so much more rest when you encounter other women who are like that, as opposed to this clamoring noise that you hear in culture. We know where some women are, just like you know, feeling like they have to beat the ground to get all things, to make everything happen. You know For them, like this masculine energy or whatever. We understand the need for both, but in the space and time for it.
Kirstie :But you see, it and feel it and you just like it feels like such a striving, it doesn't feel natural, it doesn't feel centered and grounded. Well, we keep coming back to you guys. We need this, yes.
Eunice :And then also too, don't be so quick to respond and don't be so quick to answer people and to give them light, because we live in this world where it is warp speed. I don't need to answer you right now and I may not answer you in two or three days. Let me think about what you're asking me to do. Let me think about if that's good for me in this season right now. Let me think about the energy between us. Can I tolerate you, and you may be totally tolerable, but can I tolerate you and my three children and my business at the time?
Kirstie :No.
Eunice :I cannot. And also, too, putting friendships and relationships on hold for a season. Like you and I might not talk for two weeks, and then when we get on the phone, we just pick up where we live off.
Kirstie :Yeah, because sometimes it is what it is. It's like you have to go internal and you're building family home, you got whatever things you have going on, and we are two people who have families and businesses, we are busy, we have things going on. So when we come back in and we connect, it's like OK, here we go, this is what we've been in, the love or whatever is still the same. That's different.
Eunice :And something else that I had to learn too. I had to learn the levels of the people that was in my ecosystem, because everybody's not going to be on your level. You're going to have somebody that has a traditional job. You're going to have somebody that has a traditional way of living. That is OK, but don't overwhelm them. If they only have a gallon size capacity, don't overwhelm them with a barrel size vision.
Kirstie :That's so good. That's so good? Yeah, because our lives are like we are more freelance. We work kind of like I may go in at 9 o'clock, I may go in at 10. I may go in at 6. I may work a Saturday, but then I may not work Monday or Tuesday. Our schedule moves and flows how it needs to flow for the work that it is that we're doing, but we don't work the traditional 9 to 5. So if I call on a friend who's a physician which several of my friends are physicians and I'm like, hey, you want to get up for coffee, so I've been in the office since 7 o'clock this morning and I get off at 8. I'm not going to be able to have coffee with you. I'll see you on Saturday for our walk.
Eunice :That part, that part, and I love the diversity that I'm in in this season with all of the things, because you can learn something from everybody. Like I didn't say that I was a great gardener. I said that I like to garden, like, so it's like I'm excited the journey, the process.
Kirstie :I don't have to be an expert.
Eunice :No, we ate those two cucumbers off, all of those beautiful leaves. Two cucumbers, two cucumbers Right.
Kirstie :Exactly, exactly.
Eunice :I have to learn how to laugh. I have to learn how to like. Everything just didn't have to be so rigid. You know, like there's a difference between there's a time to handle business and let me say this also Real estate is a lot of behind the scenes and a lot of paperwork that people don't understand. So there me, being a revolutionary woman, is also knowing that I'm going to time block. I'm going to have dinner with the kids.
Eunice :I'm going to lay down, I'm going to have my private time, I'm going to lay down, I'm going to have all the conversations, I'm going to cut all the lights out and then I'm going to go into my office space and cut the light on, because sometimes, to get what you've never got, sometimes you've got to do what you've never done. You've got to be OK with that.
Kirstie :Right, that is so good. Oh, my gosh, that's so good. I love it. All the tips you already went into what I was going to ask you about, like some tips for visionary women and some encouragement just about how to sort order things in their life, some things that may be helpful to them, which you've already given. A ton of tips Time blocking one.
Kirstie :Making sure that you hone your voice. Who are you? Another thing in all of the talking that we've done, there's not room for people pleasing. You can't hone your voice and find out who you are. You can't change your future and generationally, anything for your family or anything else if you don't set some boundaries Boundaries ladies have to set some boundaries, and so Eunice has given us a ton of tools to take away with them. I mean, this is probably our longest episode because this is our final one for the season, so you should be able to take a ton from this and be able to apply it to your life, eunice. Let our audience know how they can get in contact with you, where they can reach you, what are your social handles?
Eunice :Well, my first wallet is my name. It's super easy. My Facebook is Eunice Johnson Strickland and also my Instagram is Churchgirl Churchgirl because I was born and raised in church and this is who I'll always be. That's C-H-U-R-C-H underscore girl. C-h-u-r-c-h underscore girl. Now let me tell you something. I am not posting all day. Every day, I post what I want when I want.
Kirstie :No, that's real. We just talked about boundaries.
Eunice :Because this is real life here. It's real life. And then let me tell you up things. Ladies, we are such a beautiful creature Like do not compare yourself. Listen. I wash my clothes. I make my own laundry detergent, ok, but listen to me. I also have my other friends who have the dry cleaners come pick up and do their laundry and wash all of their clothes.
Kirstie :That'll be me folks, so you cannot compare. I don't have time.
Eunice :Right, like yo, it is OK, and be unapologetic about it. Like, if you order Hello Fresh, do Hello Fresh.
Kirstie :Right, right, do what you gotta do.
Eunice :If you eat out at the same subtle restaurants, because kids eat free on the 10th, tuesday, thursday and Saturday mornings at Denny's, whatever the kids I'm telling you. My kids do not remember all the rough stuff, they just remember the traditions, they remember the fun, they remember the joy. And then also too, here's another thing I thought that my children would have was happy because I was going to Chuck E Cheese or sending the sitter to Chuck E Cheese with $100, $200. And my kids were like I just want you, you don't have to spend all that money, we don't want that. So save yourself some money and kind of ask your kids what do they like in this season? What do you want mommy to do? What do you see us doing as a family of mommy and daddy?
Kirstie :What do?
Eunice :you guys want to do for the holidays, because you need to be planning oh, I'm going to Aspen, or I'm going to Gatlinburg or I'm going here and your kids could be saying can we watch movies?
Kirstie :Yeah, you know what I love? Everything that you're saying is delegating things, that, whatever the things are. However, if you can delegate something helping you be present in where you are Because my thing, my season, maybe five years ago where what I was doing then was I was cooking every single day, I was waking up super early Let me try to make a meal before Chauncy gets out the door. Let me make this. Let me prep food before. That was great. I had the time to do that then. I do not have the time to do that now. It's not going down.
Kirstie :I might cook something special for us on the weekend, but and honestly, like right now, we have a chef, so we have some of the payers meals for us for the week and then we take them out, we warm them up and we have a meal. But what they does for me? Delegating that? For me, I've been able to be at the dinner table with my family instead of spending two hours cooking and then, by the time the food table, everybody has eaten and I am now sweating and my hair is all over my head and they're done eating in about five minutes and I've just spent two hours, and for me, the experience and being together is more important than me feeling disconnected. I'm like I don't feel connected. They're sitting watching football and I'm chopping up and doing all the stuff and I'm feeling alone. Standing here doing all this stuff, I'm like no, if I can afford to delegate, I'm like I'm going to delegate this task and maybe it's just for season. It is just for a moment, but for now it's working great.
Eunice :Do what you gotta do. Do what you gotta do and you'll be OK.
Kirstie :That's so good. Ok, well, thank you so much for joining the Visionary Woman podcast. You can find us on YouTube. You can find us on Spotify and Apple podcasts. Wherever you listen to your podcast, at all of the information that you heard today, links will all be in the show notes, and so we will see you next season for the Visionary Woman podcast. Bye, thanks for listening and joining the conversation today here on the Visionary Woman podcast. If you enjoyed this episode and would like to join our growing community at FF Social Club, please comment, like and subscribe so that you can be updated on our upcoming episodes and more happening over at FreedomFleur. com. To catch the latest from me and to access amazing resources for visionaries just like yourself, please visit me on the web at www. KirstieFleur. com. Thanks again for hanging out with me and I'll see you next time. Until then, don't forget to be Visionary.