Larry Hamilton, a U.S. Marine Corps veteran turned philanthropist and aspiring medical researcher provides an insider's perspective on why programs like Alcoholics Anonymous may miss the mark for some, and how a multifaceted approach to recovery is often the key to real progress.
When Larry Hamilton speaks, you can almost hear the echoes of a past life in the military, mingled with the wisdom of someone who's been through the crucible of addiction and emerged with a hope to heal others.
Through his generosity with Still Serving, Inc. and his bold steps toward a career in medical research, he exemplifies the power of resilience and the importance of tailored support. His journey imparts crucial insights for veterans, older men, and anyone feeling the weight of societal stigmas against mental health struggles.
Larry Hamilton, a U.S. Marine Corps veteran turned philanthropist and aspiring medical researcher provides an insider's perspective on why programs like Alcoholics Anonymous may miss the mark for some, and how a multifaceted approach to recovery is often the key to real progress.
When Larry Hamilton speaks, you can almost hear the echoes of a past life in the military, mingled with the wisdom of someone who's been through the crucible of addiction and emerged with a hope to heal others.
Through his generosity with Still Serving, Inc. and his bold steps toward a career in medical research, he exemplifies the power of resilience and the importance of tailored support. His journey imparts crucial insights for veterans, older men, and anyone feeling the weight of societal stigmas against mental health struggles.
Welcome back to unarmor talk podcast. Thank you so much for listening and watching each episode and continue pleased to share with your friends and family members and colleagues, and don't forget to leave a rating or review if you feel this is a awesome show. And you can connect to all of my social media on the parade deck Just look in a show notes or you can put in the search engine Mario P Fields parade deck and get all access To my social media. Well, let's get ready to interview another guest who is willing to remove their armor to help other people. Welcome back to unarmor talk podcast. Everyone Hope you guys are doing well as you're listening or watching this episode, we have another guest who was willing to remove their armor to help folks.
Speaker 1:Right listeners of viewers Understand we all are emotional man Well living. We all have our own unique experiences but to think through a lot of them as a choice, we have today Larry Hamilton, the 30s of Marine Corps veteran. We also serve together Everywhere, even if we didn't. I love this guy. And here's another thing he didn't see this one coming. He is the number one donor for still serving incorporated. Larry has been donating to still serving incorporated since 2018. Larry, I love you, man. Welcome to the show, bro.
Speaker 2:Thank you, mario's. A pleasure to be here, you know, and just, it was an easy thing. You know, you just asked for a dollar. Dollar a month wasn't even a dollar a day. I could have done a dollar a day. I just like, wow, you know, I'm gonna have a dollar, I'm gonna give it, as you know.
Speaker 1:Then you bring that very. I still remember six years ago when I said just just donate a dollar. I remember I started the dot donate a dollar campaign and you've done a lot more than than a dollar. Again, thank you for your service, my friend. You know, simple firefront Larry and and people it's people like you, man. It's really helped us make an impact in Pitt County, north Carolina. So again, just thank you before we get into the show, but can you tell let's those of viewers just a little bit about yourself.
Speaker 2:Sure, of course. So you know, larry Hamilton. The third was born boys. Yeah, I had a hope for about a year. I claim a Northwest Portland, spent a lot of time in Vancouver, but Northwest Portland, just over there on the end of 23rd, over by I5, is kind of where my stomping grounds were. Graduated high school, you know, went to college. It and you know they say you go to high school, you go to college. Every time you take a class you get a syllabus, right.
Speaker 1:Tells you everything you need to know this.
Speaker 2:What you got to do is how you do it. This, what's going on in practice in this? You turn 18, you go into life and there's just no syllabus. You know I kept waiting for the mailman to bring my syllabus for life, you know, and they don't tell you. You know what what a lot of Maturity means and how hard things can get, and all you know all the pressures of life.
Speaker 2:So you know, I was really I was a sharp kid, always been sharp. You know, nothing didn't get any trouble but I just didn't. I didn't have something I needed for schools. You know, I kind of floundered for a minute and then woke up one day, just out of the blue, and it was like I can join the military, walked in the recruiters office that give me open contract. I'm trying to go back to school, trying to figure it out. You know, did my beautiful service in the Marine Corps. You know, was did my best from 110%, from from start to finish, left with some beautiful benefits, so much so that I Was able to do more than go to. Then just back to college, I got to go to culinary school it's blessed, or the best culinary school in the world. Culinary student. America was a graduate, you know, worked through a lot of my issues and now here I am at Oregon State, back in my dream, study in biochemistry, going to be a research doctor one day. You know, and here we are.
Speaker 1:Yeah, well, you are so intelligent, I mean, you've always, I you know people always say Mario, I look at you, know, I look up to you. Well, first of all, I literally look up to all of y'all because I'm five too, so so we're gonna be accurate here.
Speaker 2:But gravity it weighs you down the gravity of all that stature in and in spirit accord. Effective effection height after what?
Speaker 1:wow, man, but but it in. So let's jump right into the topic. You know this, this journey of, is this right for me? This, you know this, this, let me try this. And I love how you said that the male man or male woman that had my syllabus for life never showed up.
Speaker 2:You know it's just, it's something you don't think about. You know, and it's, I think you, that's really what I got out of the Marine Corps, that I I mean, I don't know if I was really. It's rarely that I go into a place other than the grocery store and have an expectation for what I want to get out of it. You know, I joined the Marine Corps, I said, well, I want to go to college. Just, I'm going to be me, I'm going to do the best that I can, and I think that's a lot of the reason why it was such a successful, such a successful opportunity, not just, you know, in the basics of life, but as myself as a man.
Speaker 2:I just I went in with an open mind, an empty tea cup, you know, and and that's really what it. What it gave me was that, phillips, for life, taught me, you know, I had these things within me, you know, these, this perseverance, this courage, but it taught me how to to quantify. It taught me how to, you know, it refined it. It taught me how to have confidence. It taught me, you know, my favorite thing is it gave me a BS meter.
Speaker 2:You know, I think so many people go into situations and and job deals out in the world and they don't really know what to do. They're not in that syllabus, they don't have that confidence, and so what they do is you start following. You know it's like, okay, I'm gonna be like these people. And then, once you start following, it's hard to stop. You know it's like, well, if I, if I make these people upset, or if I, you know, go away from the cool kids club or whatever that might be, even if I don't like what they're doing in any small sense, then what am I gonna do?
Speaker 2:I'm just, I don't know how to swim and I, and that's what it gave me is it taught me, you know, honor and and, and you know, integrity and how to, how to know right from wrong and how to how to go through my life and make the right choices and how to have, you know, my character not slip. You know, at the time it was a protect. What you've learned was the posters that were all around Marine Corps and that's just something that stuck with me. You know it's like this is staying the transformation and you know it just. It gave me that syllabus and so you know, I think there's just you know, yeah.
Speaker 1:And if we're to thank too, you're mentioning our soft skills that are in high man there and high demand around the world active listening, you know, punctuality, resilience. I'm telling you there's a lot of companies that are hiring for those skills you just mentioned. But now, from my basic understanding, we all have some, some turbulence. I use that metaphor, but but from my basic understanding, in Erwin by the name is nicknamed as Ducky, and so so for the rest of the show I'm going to refer to Larry as Ducky. Was there anything that you had to deal with that started to make your path to success a little challenging?
Speaker 2:You know there was. There was a lot of things, you know, and I think that it took me, especially coming out of the Marine Corps, it took me for pretty much till last year, late last year, to really start to get a handle on. What are some of these? What are some of these, these drags, these barriers, you know, to my, to my success and my health, and I think a lot of people are going to relate to substance abuse. It's a huge, huge issue for us.
Speaker 2:You know I went through addiction programs. You know I had a problem with alcohol where, just, if I had a problem, it was just, you know, shut it down and ignore it and that really, you know, got my way for a long time. You know, and so I absolutely did. I actually had a history of substance abuse. I'm happy to say that I've recovered. I wouldn't call myself an alcoholic or an addict. You know there's we can get into some programs and things like that about them. They call it a harm reduction, you know, and we can get into the weeds in that. In a minute I just want to answer questions, absolutely, absolutely.
Speaker 1:Yeah, you know. Now. Where do you believe this started? Like, do you believe is at what point in your life? When you look back, where do you believe, man, this is where this thing started.
Speaker 2:Absolutely. You know, I think, unfortunately, in an ideal world everything about a childhood and growth in the development process would be perfect. Every human being would get a, you know, the perfect conditions and all the things they need and all support so when they enter adulthood they get a fair chance. And that's just not how it goes. And unfortunately, you know my home life what just wasn't perfect. It wasn't as bad as some people, you know, but you know my mother was a brilliant person at one point. Her name is Jennifer, but the woman I know was an addict of a real variety in a narcissist.
Speaker 2:So you know, I kind of grew up. Wow, you know that's why I started cooking. You know I have a little brother. He's about three years younger than me, so about five years old. You know we were just hungry and mom has passed out out doing whatever. So I started cooking. I could even reach, you know, I see, the clearest day where you know the stove was taller than I was and I was getting up there making spaghetti. I don't know how I didn't drop a pot of boiling water on me. You know, I just got Mark.
Speaker 2:My little brother was just hungry and I got tired of it Started cooking, you know, and that kind of started that journey and that personal exploration I did where I just wanted to learn how to cook and kind of solve some of those things. And I think, subconsciously, what I'm gonna get into was me trying to deal with some of those issues too, you know, trying to heal some of that strong line of pain. My father, you know, was a very he's a very successful person. I think that he's great at a lot of things. I just think that being father is not one of them. He's really good at accomplishing missions. What he's not good at my point is gonna be here is emotional support.
Speaker 2:So, growing up lacking one parent, that kind of saw everything through finance and numbers. What I found lacking, especially when I look back, is that emotional intelligence, that emotional resiliency, that emotional development where I'm feeling these, these are these emotions, these are how to properly deal with them, and I'm allowed to feel these things. So I grew up kind of like not being allowed to feel. If I was feeling, it was shut down. If I was angry, I was not allowed to be angry. If I was sad, I was not allowed to be sad. If I was scared, I had to kind of just be business all the time. And so I grew up kind of with all this request going to college and I think it's a lot of the issues that I have. When I first went to college is that I had finally I dreamed of getting out of the house my whole life and I finally got out of there and I think it all once I felt safe. After like a month and a half, all these things start coming pouring out and I just I broke down. I didn't know what was going on. I really think that that was a start. There's some things I'm gonna get a little cheesy. I'm not gonna say her name, she's married and I don't know all that stuff. But there was a girl that I met and I swear I fell in love with her at first sight and I've never had somebody make me feel the way that she did. And to this day and this was, you would think this thing was a pass. Looking back at, I don't know now. I know now at the time you think there would be somebody else and for some reason I just have never been able to shake it. It'll give me a lot of strength and perspective, but I remember that happened in my late teenage years and after that, when it didn't work out, she didn't feel the same way. I don't blame her. If you saw this woman, you understand. The woman is an angel on earth.
Speaker 2:But I started drinking, I started experimenting with drugs and I think that that was really what started it. That was like the break where, like, I didn't know how to handle these emotions, I didn't know how to handle these fears, these feelings of inadequacy and all these things, and so I looked for a way to solve it. And this is my things that I don't want to, some of these things that I'm taking with a grain of salt, because there are real addicts out there. They're real alcoholics and I don't want to give them a gateway out of their sobriety, but it's just not the same for everybody.
Speaker 2:They say I went through alcoholics synonymous for about a year, year and a half, and it's a great program. It gets you clean, it works, but a lot of those stuff is rooted in 1930s and has not really changed. And if you look back in 1930s, the state of largely men men were running the program. Of course we've had a gender reformation and a lot of things have changed since then. But they mental health was not a thing, people did not really support mental health, people did not understand addiction. These things are, as professionals will tell you, since the 80s have really bloomed, but 1930s is a long time ago, where they say it's just on or off.
Speaker 2:And the thesis I want to say here is there are people who have addiction issues, so they're alcoholics and alcohol causes their problems. So to root of that issue, to solve that problem, you gotta root that problem. Then there are people who have problems that don't know how to solve them. So, as a human being, we look for what we know and the tools that we have. Sticks in the stones and they can pick something like alcohol, like I did. So I have these problems and I'm solving them with alcohol. Now, no, that's a much different story, right, and I think the issue is not having the ability to solve those problems in the first place comes from that lack of emotional intelligence, that lack of help, that lack of the therapy that we need and the education that is just not as still not as co-operative. It's out there but it's not handing him knowledge with it, with everyday life.
Speaker 1:And I'm glad you you brought up a very interesting point that is so relevant to this podcast, and, first of all, when I hear these journeys of childhood and things you had to deal with, man, my heart, I feel an emotion, of mixed emotions, but a couple of things. I bet you're a great cook, man. I would love to yeah, you tell me how much, and I'm paying it for you. But the thing you mentioned, though, is the skills to understand the emotions. Not having the skills to think through the emotions, and then the not having those skills led to a choice of whatever for you substance abuse because of lack of those skills. That is interesting in how you describe that.
Speaker 1:The other thing I love how you mentioned is how people we all have problems, but the substance is not the solution. Well, some of us believe it is, but, like you said, it is not the solution, and so I just wanted to highlight those couple of points, because that's powerful. And then, last, there's an amazing network that I'm starting to work with a lot with, and I want to do some more great things in the future is it's called NGB and TV, and the reason why I brought that up yeah, ngb and TV, the reason why I brought that up is because you hit a critical point, ducky. It's that that platform is designed for mental health support awareness, live-streaming, if you will, for men in their 40s, 50s and 60s, because of what you just highlighted Is how you're and your man, right man, I'm crying.
Speaker 2:Especially the veterans.
Speaker 1:Animal ring normal ignorant right normally real marine. Suck it up. What you doing? You're crying. So now let's talk about what you were where you were mentioning about the mindset of these Programs to help. I love your. I love your, your approach to the mindset. Let's talk a little bit about that.
Speaker 2:Sure, sure. So you know I, the bottom line is that when you, when you're in those, those dark places and you're using substance abuse is rich to point, when it's really impacting, there does need to be a heart stop right. And that's the thing that people that I like these programs for is that they're really good at Getting you to that clean point. Because, regardless of all the semantics of you know, is somebody now call, like an addict, gotham issues, substance abuse, you know, mental health. You can't get to the root of problem when it's covered in alcohol or drugs or any of these things. And so you know, the first step is is to ask for help, somehow, right. And so you know this, these, these really Concrete old-school programs like alcoholics, anonymous, you know they are very rigid in in how they view addiction and alcoholics and they do it their way and there's not a lot of discussion. And so you know, when I, whenever I talk to people about you know getting, you know Getting through a lot of these issues, the first thing I tell them is, yes, get dry, right, it's over. Hit that, hit that meeting. It's your 30 days, get your seven days, you know, or you get your. Your one day gets your 30 days, whatever it is, and then once you, once you have gotten through the withdrawal is pretty much, make sure you immediately start finding. You know mental health professionals go find that there just because they have an unbiased perspective. You know it's the alcoholics anonymous, really good, but they do. But they're rigid and they don't. I Don't know why they don't update the program to monitor things. Maybe there's a reason. You know that getting in all those politics and opinions is not really what I want to focus on. But yes, they're, they're very rigid. But there are other things you know and there's been a lot of development since the 1930s and you won't find it in that program.
Speaker 2:It's one tool and I think that that issue confuses a lot of people. So you know, I went and got therapists, I got a drug and alcohol counselor. I was like I had psychiatrist, all these professionals I was talking to. We got us in things like harm reduction. We got any of these things. We start talking about emotional intelligence, they start talking about the root of my problem, start talking about PTSD, and so you know, harm reduction, just, just, just, real quick, is this.
Speaker 2:It's the idea, especially if you talk about in Marines and people from the military. We're very regimented. You know we have a schedule, every routine and when you talk about, you know these tools we have, we're all said you're supposed to drop. You know these things, this crush, something that that had bring you peace and serenity, help you sleep. It can be very inconsistent and and there's a. You know I'm gonna go out and I'll find some data. I'm sending you the email to show you some of these numbers, but you know the. The amount of people who don't make it cold turkey, like they're supposed to do without oxenotomists, is extreme. So what harm reduction is is like okay, we've been doing this a long time. I don't expect you to go from 100 to zero. Let's go. You drink in seven days a week you know, 30 beers a day.
Speaker 2:Whatever, let's try doing. You know, 20 beers a day, five days, and let's try that for you.
Speaker 2:You know, and so you can kind of space it out and slow it down and it's like, alright, let's try. You know, only only drink on the week and you kind of in the let's try, be in so for a while and now let's look at and see if we can get it over these problems. And that was very helpful to me. I think that the idea that everybody just now call it if you have like this switch where you're going to have one beer one day, it's one too much and you're just broken, that's not the truth For some people. It is. It's very important that I say that some people need to stop and allergic to it. I'm very fortunate because I love myself with good glass of beer at the end of a hard work day.
Speaker 2:But this is something that I the other point is this is not something I just decided was for me. I went to years and years of therapy, years of practice, years of going and learning about these programs and working on my health and being open and completely honest with my mental health professionals. Where we agreed that I did not follow the trends of an alcoholic. Where we agreed okay, these are the addicts you haven't really ever followed. I didn't really ever follow what the on paper it looks like an alcoholic, but it takes time and data to reach a conclusion. I was very lucky. It's something that can always change. I could go out there and fall apart and things can change.
Speaker 2:But this is important that you got to work at the professional and take their advice and be honest. I was lucky enough that we got to the point and said okay, we don't think you're an alcoholic. I was misdiagnosed by a polio disorder. For a lot of those issues At the time, something that's another thing, especially among black people.
Speaker 2:You go into the health. You see how all these issues by a polio disorder it's really easy to treat. You throw a pill at somebody and it shuts them down, but it gets misdiagnosed, it's misused a lot. So that's something to look out for. I got sober. A lot of these issues went away, diagnosed with ADHD, on the addiction thing. So I'm on a lot of methylphenylate riddle in a day and going to work for PTSD and for me, when I got properly diagnosed, that's when all my issues went away Because I wasn't drinking the riddle of anxiety.
Speaker 2:I wasn't drinking to calm down and not be hyperactive. I wasn't drinking to deal with my triggers of trauma. I wasn't drinking to sleep. I drink because I like wine and I like food and I like going out to the pub. I drink because I like it, not as a medicine and that's where I broke through. My substance abuse issues is I like to put them. So I think the question was what some of the mentality systems and I say you just got to find a mental health professional be completely on our arm and with them and they'll take you away.
Speaker 1:Duckie man. You see, wow, you know. That's why I love you know, for me I thank God for this ability to have this show, because I learned so much when I interview each guest and I learned so much when you said harm reduction approach never heard that before Powerful. And I love how you chose. You know you weren't rigid, you chose to ask for help to remove your armor and the beauty of Duckie, what you just, man, just you know, we just discussed listening to you is how, before you said it, I used to always believe, go in cold turkey.
Speaker 1:I never thought of okay, mario, let's walk a half a mile today because you got high blood pressure or you're addicted to French fry. You know addiction is addiction, right. And then I love how you said now, mario, I have a glass of wine. Right, I have a beer, but that's an intentional choice and I'm enjoying it, not to use it as a medication to some things going on. Duckie, I know you're having fun in the world. I will have you on this show forever, but I'm not going to do that to you and the previous guest, because that's me being selfish. If you had any one last piece of advice, if you will, to give listeners and viewers. Before I let you go, continue to have fun. What?
Speaker 2:would you give them? You know I've thought about this and what I would say is that you know, some of the I'm going to say something dangerous because I want to be real. You know, especially in the veteran community. You know the other issue we have is with mental health, and not going to help is suicide, right. And so what I'd say is that yes, there's a pathway to help, and I'm going to just go out and say this if there's anybody out there that's struggling and wants to get healthy, what you're having, that bad day where you know that you're looking at the wrong end of a weapon system, and what you're used to if it takes, if you need to go have a beer, overkill yourself, especially in the veteran community. You know we have our own issues, we have our own culture. You know, go get the help you need.
Speaker 2:But if what gets you through the night is half a bottle of Jack or whatever it is, I'd much rather you start over, get, do what you got to do to get through the night and get help tomorrow especially. You know tomorrow will be different. You can get down, you can do your thing, you know, and respect to that slogan, you know, and just try again tomorrow. You know, I think that there's a lot of shame that comes into it. You know you go to the doctor. Oh, I drank again.
Speaker 2:Well, nah, it's like no listen life is not that easy, especially in the men, especially in the Marines. You know people of minorities and all these. You know it's just at the end of the day, it's point A to point B in life. You don't got to be perfect, don't got to be forever, you just got to do your best, and I think that you know a lot of shame, a lot of stigma with this stuff. You know the help is there. Talk to the professionals, use the programs and the tools, be honest with yourself. You know, obey the orders of your doctor or whatever it is. Let them make the decisions and, most of all, survive to tomorrow. Well, however, you got to get to it.
Speaker 1:I love it, ducky, you guys heard it. Hey, if you got a choice between taking your life or everything else, let's try. Let's go here. We're good with a half a bottle of beer. At least we can talk to you tomorrow morning. And instead of, like you said, it's the Ducky, instead of you drinking five beers a day, let's start working with four a day. Harm reduction, man. I love you. Man, love you tomorrow, appreciate it.
Speaker 1:I love you, ducky. I love you everyone. Again, I hope you guys learned something. Please share this with your friends and families. There's 8.5 billion humans on this earth and there's 8.5 billion my belief of people who need to hear this. Ducky, have a wonderful day. We'll talk after this show. You guys know the deal. God bless you all. God bless your families and may God continue to bless your friends. We'll see you later. Thank you for listening to this most recent episode and remember you can listen and watch all of the previous episodes on my YouTube channel. The best way to connect to me and all of my social media is follow me on the Parade Deck. That is wwwparadedeckcom, or you can click on the link in the show notes. I'll see you guys soon.