MARS NEEDS MOVIES!!

MARS NEEDS MOVIES!

Vanessa explains why we're remote recording this episode, but you still get video as we lament the lack of great Mars movies!

Also discussed: Ghostbusters: The Frozen Empire, RoboDoc, and Bullet to the Head.

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Oh, I'm sorry, did I break your concentration somewhere between science and superstition such sites to show you strange aeons. Welcome to strange aeons radio. That's Eric up there. Oh, today. And that's Vanessa up there. Hello. I'm Kelly. And I just want to say hey, after that amazing couple of in person videos, we have screwed the pooch it already. We are recording remotely. Vanessa, why are we recording remotely? You know what, my baby had her very first Easter. And somebody has remember it? Well, somebody had gone through a lot of trouble to put a lot of eggs in a lot of random places. And she had to go and kind of look roughly like she could see where those eggs were. And then I had to pick them up and put them in a basket and everybody had to take photos. So that's where I was doing it. You go. I would say this without throwing anyone under the bus. Since one person here has religious holidays, to think about and two people here don't even realize when a religious holiday is happening. That was hilarious. You might have to let us kind of know more than one. Do you feel like you must have told us in January or something? You know, we're recording on Easter and my thought was cool. But doesn't mean anything to me. I thought we got to figure this out. And then anyway, usually you have to let the two heathens here know the baby Jesus has forbidden you to record on the holy day of his heli resurrection. I was gonna say adults, Jesus, get it together. Come on baby Jesus was months ago, Carlos has told me that he's baby Jesus, as far as anything goes, if you refer to him to Well, I wonder when Carlos puts a little baby Jesus into the manger because it's supposed to be a very specific moment. Oh, we have to wait. You can't just throw him in there ahead of time. He cannot just be there. You have to wait until the right moment of the artificially made up date of December 25. Inside the little cradle, so wait a second. You can't be throwing shade on December 25. Isn't Easter a ripped off date as well? Wasn't that some heathen? No. 100% Come on. I actually I didn't have a Catholic Easter it was more of a pagan Easter celebration that I went to. Well, if you had read with that, we would have been like, Oh, can we come? Yeah, I should have invaded you. You could have also found eggs. I think that I was probably sleeping off a mushroom gummy. Oh, we all celebrate in our own ways the coming and passing of Jesus and or fertility gods ahead of time. We hoped we were replacing watching Dina's dad on Sunday, you know, right. Although he doesn't make the ham. Oh, wow. Wow. He made a ham. He is got a pig in and he like opened an oven and shoved it. Like a lot of work for somebody who's just been in the hospital. The freaky one is I was heard that a friend of Dana's had a stroke. And one of the main things they need to do to get out of the hospital was to make an egg. This guy's idea of making an omelet. And he's now done it two Sundays in a row is he makes the egg, lays it out solid, then takes the unbroken yolk, drops it in the omelet and closes the omelet over the top of that without breaking the yolk. Whoa. And he's still able to do it. When you said this guy's idea. Are we talking about Marth? Yeah, well, yeah, they just made my mom walk up and down some stairs. I don't know. Anybody was made to make an egg. One of the doctors put it really well and it's very true. He got 95% of the way really quick but that last 5% takes a while. He's doing great but he's not all the way there but it man is who he is. It's impressive. Wow. Oh my gosh. Listen, that's amazing. Yes, we are very happy to hear that Martha is doing well. Yeah All right. All Easter's Yes. Should we talk some movies? Yeah. Kelly would you get up to as far as viewing things? Let's see. Well, I saw the new Ghostbusters. Holy cow. How was that? Frozen Empire Strikes Back? quite bad title. No. Not very good at all. And oh, no confusing that I was just scratching my head. I mean, there's, there's like 15 Ghostbusters now. And there's no reason why and they keep bringing in new people and and I add new new plot points throughout the movie. I was just like, you guys, this is just too fucking much. Why Why does this have to happen? I think the the most impressive thing about this franchise is that it has managed to reinvent itself as kind of a Spielbergian 80s series when that was certainly not what the first two movies were about now, right? Those were movies about kind of fuck off adult men who accidentally saved the world and made jokes and were trying to get laid and all of that stuff. And then the I mean, quite honestly, the female led Ghostbusters was closer to that then this new one, although not very good. You know, I thought afterlife did a nice job of kind of introducing us to a new cast, and this new idea and all of this stuff and then they just did fucking shit with that. Ben wolf art is in this movie, but I don't know why his character is given nothing to do. The main girl I don't know the actresses name her characters Phoebe. She is like the lead character. Her storyline is the the big one. And she's fine. But she's relegated to being off of the team because she's too young. Oh, and then Dan Ackroyd shows up. And I was uh, you know, I don't like Dan accurate as a human being or an actor. He is by far the best thing in this movie. While he seems like he's having a good time, there's a light in his eye that you haven't seen in 40 years. And he's doing a decent job. And listen, when Dan Ackroyd is the best part of your movie, you have a fucked up movie. So I thought it was just a real turd. I'm sure there will be another one. Bill Murray looked completely lost in this. I feel like there was one line that felt like a bill marine line. And I bet you he improv, improvised it. And they left it in or something like that. But everything else was just just really, really bad. But I imagine that there's a bunch of nerds out there who fucking loved it because it's got those in it and shit like that. I've only heard of people hating on it. Which is too bad because the trailer made it look like I don't know they they mess up New York and it looks all disaster. Yeah. And I was excited about it. They're good. There was I'll tell you this, there was a good story somewhere in this movie. But it was not the movie we got they needed to drop about five characters and they needed to give Finn Wolf are to reason for, for his how little he was in the film. And I think that that could have been done very easily. There was no reason to bring any pots back. If you're not going to let any pots do anything, you know, just just so that she's there and people can go oh, look, it's it's the girl from the first movie. Nobody fucking cares if she doesn't get to do anything. Yeah, that is something I'd heard is like there are just a lot of people who are doing literally nothing in this movie, which is too bad. It's fanservice kind of stuff. But the 80s We gotta keep making Ghostbusters. Yeah. Well, your mileage may vary. Speaking of seems rollbacks and hopefully I'm not stepping on anyone's toes. But um, I saw X Men 97. Expand 97 The first couple episodes on Disney. Plus. Do either of you guys managed to catch this yet? No, I have. Oh, you have okay. So, when I was a kid, I was a huge fan of the X Men animated series. I was always actually speaking of Catholicism. I was really like irritated to miss out on the episodes because I had to go to church. And that sucked. So I was like, very hesitant about what this new show is going to be like. And I it is such a weirdly pleasant surprise. Like, I feel like it's made by somebody, or people who know what the original series is, love the original series, but want to make it better. I don't know the writing, and at least a little bit of the animation. But so much of it is still in that exact same style, they still have, you know, really like somebody will open a book and it'll be like science. A lot of like, I am storm, I am the goddess of God, you know, like, there's just a lot of this dramatic bravado and like stating the obvious and really harkening back to these comic book pieces that are just larger than life and aren't trying to be the realistic gritty, whatever, whatever. And I just enjoyed the crap out of it. I was just, yeah, it's been really fun. Well, yeah. I, I was a little too old when it first came out, although I was dating a girl who had a couple of kids. And so I had a reason to sit down and watch it with them a couple of times. And I thought, This isn't really doing anything for me. But I decided to watch the I guess three episodes have come out now as we're recording this. Yes. And at the end of the third episode, I was like, this is strangely compelling. Yeah, not sure why I'm so interested to see what happens next. No, that's how I felt too. I was like, I want to know what like it's, it's not that the it's not like you're watching it. And it's like, somehow, really, I don't know, modern TD and all these, these modern things are so well structured, and they're so well paced, and everything is so cinematic, and this is not that. But it is so engaging and interesting. And like ridiculous that you're just like, yes, please, the goblin queen. Tell me more. Where she going, Look, bring we're worse. We're these other characters are what's gonna happen next. And I don't know. I just it's been it's been ridiculously fun. So is it just like, new X Men series, pretending it came out in 97? Yeah. When the that last show aired after that last episode. Exactly. It takes place like one year later or something like that. So it's right. Charles Xavier is gone. And they they've kind of restructured who's in charge of the academy. And there's all the new dynamics. And yeah, it's cool. Interesting. I think I want probably what I'm gravitating towards is, you know, the NSA told you that I tried to read up on the new X Men and I was so confused with everything going on. And this actually resembles the X Men comics that I was reading back in the 80s. So I was like, oh, okay, I know who these characters are. So I think that's probably why I was having a good time with it. Oh, 100% Yeah, and a lot of just like with the original series, it does pull a lot of these stories directly from the comics, and sometimes it does a good job of like, merging them and sometimes it doesn't. The third episode of the new series is a little rushed. A little rushed on a pretty major plot point. But that's okay. There's still a fun ride. So yeah, I liked it. So are you Eric? Well, my Walter Hill fast continues. Excellent. I watched 90 two's trespass which star Bill Paxton? Ice T William Sadler and IceCube Well remind me Is this the one where it's all in a prison? No this is a PacSun and Sadler find like a treasure map but it leads to a guy's suppose a treasure stolen from a church years earlier and they go to this abandoned building and gang shows up and it's sorted turns into a assault on precinct 13 kind of movie I mean it's not going to police station or anything like that but it's them holed up trying to keep ICE T and ice cubes group from breaking in and killing them. So as is true with many Walter Hill movies, it's kind of low on the it's one of the good ones because it's kind of low on plot and all about the characters and the stuff going down. So it's a fun watch. Everybody was all the acting was top notch everybody who's really good. And, you know, it's like, oh, yeah, that's the guy who now does movies about traveling and cross country. You know, Winnebago and the other guys on La Law School. But it was a little weird. But but that but yeah, he keys keep these keeping on doing all right still in the letterbox ratings, like if you look on a director, they have all the movies listed and they're listed by popular ratings like the best ones at the top. And I've noticed I have now entering the bottom two layers. Director. So we'll see how it goes. Did you say this was from 92? Yeah. Okay. So some juice back then I think Oh, yeah. Yeah. The it's, this is a fun movie. I like this one quite a bit. You're thinking of on undefeated? I think it is. A prison boxing movie? Yes. That's the one I just understand. Yeah. I just watched that one. Not not very good. I'm sure that's on your list of things. I actually finished watching it earlier today. I hope but it's step on your next choice. No, no, I didn't. I've got another one. Perfect. Okay, well, then I will talk about something that you should all watch. It is on TV, which is becoming my favorite free station. And it is called Robo doc. And it is the making of Robocop. Yeah, that one, Doc. Oh, okay. And I thought I was sitting down for a documentary movie. It is a documentary series. I'm on Episode Four. They're each about 50 minutes long. I have a feeling this seems to be about six hours long when it's done. But they talk to everybody. And when I say everybody, I mean the guy who's you know, I'll buy that for $1. They talk to that guy for a while that person, the most impressive, of course. So is they get Peter Weller to sit down and talk about Robocop. And he just never talks about this movie really talks about how much he loved making it and how pressing and important it was, and all of that stuff. So it is a really, really great interview with him. It's a, it's got, I don't know if it's got a big budget, but it certainly has very high production values, because there'll be sitting there talking to any number of one of the bad guys. And he'll be saying, you know, so I was holding a gun, and they were telling me, okay, I need you to do this. And as he's doing this, there's muzzle flashes happening while he's speaking. And stuff like that. I'm like this, this thing is amazing looking. So it's called Robo doc. If you're a fan of Robocop, I think that you would like this. And if you're just fan of film documentaries, I think it would really like this. It is on to be. And I'm only five episodes in so far. That's awesome. Wow. Well, in anticipation of today I was I watched a couple of different like Mars movies because I have a lot of time. Turns out when you only sleep four hours a day and the rest of your day is sitting holding a small child. You fill it with things that don't involve your hands. Where's your movies? So I ended up watching a Cole Sprouse film called moonshot, which kind of came in went relatively quietly. And it's about a future Earth in which every everything sucks. And it's just filled with garbage and everybody's trying to get to Mars to live a new clean life and there it's being colonized and all that kind of stuff. So Cole Sprouse sneaks onto a ship following a girl who has zero interest in him and he has zero interest in her she's just kind of an excuse in a way to get there and they slowly across the trip, fall in love and he has to keep hiding on the ship because he's not allowed to be there because he didn't pay a million dollars for the ticket and he also is not a genius. So his two ways of getting there did not come through fruition. It is if you're a teenage girl, and you're really excited by a teenage ish 20 Something love story. And you like space then this is great. If you're me, it's mostly good until the very end when they have every opportunity in the world to wrap up all of the plot points in like half the sea In a sentence, and they choose not to, and they just have a title card that pops up and says the end. And I'm like, where's the rest of this movie? What happened to this, this, this and this because I know exactly how you can tie all of this up very quickly. It can even be like a shot of a newspaper coming out at the screen flying through, so and so reveals such and such, you know, flip to page 23 Page 23. So and so is done this other cool thing and it saved blah, blah, blah. Like, it's so easy. It's so easy. It's so close. It could have been great. But it's fine. I enjoy a good Cole Sprouse situation. Now that we don't have Riverdale. So this is all I got. I got fucking moonshot. Moonshot is streaming. I got to pay for it. Oh my god. Wow. Well, it was free for a very long time on something and I think it's, it's playing the you know, the wheel of what streaming services on as a lot of these films end up doing so I'm sure we'll be on something again soon. But right now, I think it was an Amazon rental. Don't judge me. I have no room to judge anybody's bad movie watching. Thank you, Eric. Walter Hill Park when I was seven or eight now 2012 bullet to the head. Which I'd actually kind of avoided because I thought it was a remake of a John Woo movie, which has a fairly similar title. But it's not these references. I couldn't find on any write things about the movie. It's a Stallone film. And let's see who else has got Stallone and some king who was the guy from Fast and Furious who died in the second one, but was so popular that they figured out a way to bring him back. I'm not kidding about that. Jason Momoa. In one of his first roles shortly after Game of Thrones ended, I believe, and yeah, I returned with Christian Slater, and it and things got and a whole bunch of other people you're going to recognize just like most walterdale movies are filled with journeyman actors and performers. A lot better than I thought it was going to be. Again, as his warriors and many of his Great Movies, plotline is thin. This is basically you killed my partner, I'm going to get revenge on your movie. And Stallone plays the good guy in Ramallah plays the main love the guy who kills his partner. He's not really the main guy, but he's one of the main enemies. They have a reminiscent Streets of Fire, they have a big battle both using fire axes. Like, this is cool. Apparently, I was when I was trying to figure out if it was a remake of John Lewis read a little bit about it. And this is the only film that has Salone and all his tattoos are seen with no adjustments and no additional ones added and they're pretty damn impressive that a tattoo across his back on his shoulders is really cool. But this is fun. I enjoyed this one a maybe because I thought it was not going to be good because it's 2012 and Walter hills 2006 films are not always as good. But right actually really enjoyed this one bullet to the head. Wow. So did you get a Walter Hill box set or something is that you're watching all this or what's going on here? I do have one of those. Right here. It is. The only thing I haven't seen in this is broken trail. But that to me was mainly his bigger movies, but I just I feel like watching my watch bunch of Walter Hill movies. Maybe I'll see on letterbox if I can make him my number one watch director for the day nice. You know it's a step up from I've had al Adamson I've had. Who was the other guy? Oh ruining the Milligan Oh, so you know it's like maybe I should get her I've really accomplished director to be my number one most director of the year just for the hell of it. I don't know why you're bothering the the makeup for our listeners certainly doesn't skew towards action films. They skew towards Cole Sprouse rrom romantic comedy In space, like it's a genre, Vanessa's like if you're a teenage girl and I'm like Eric quick do the numbers how many teenage girls listen to this show? I don't know that it's a it's there to video not doing them all out either teenage girls are Thanks. Enjoy. But hey, some of our listeners might have teenage girls in their household and they need fun movies to throw their way. Home on is fair enough. How about we take a little break guys we argue this out while the listeners aren't part of it. And then when we come back, we can talk about our picks for Mars films. Rob Vinnie moto Biker Mice on federal bikes with a firepower to stop the evil blue torchia. This Carbuncle gets every time you says vermin? No Whitefish Bay. Grease whacker Mice from Mars bikes and figures each sold separately knew from glue we have returned, almost like we were never gone. Vanessa, this was your sub genre pick. You want to tell us why you chose this? Absolutely. So I chose Mars because I mean, obviously I love space and science fiction and of course Mars films and films relating to Mars in general fits right within that, but unfortunately, I can't take the credit. A friend of mine and a listener. Tom Harkin said, Hey, have you done this? And I went, oh my god, we have not and we must. So thank you so much, Tom for suggesting it. The movie that I chose Oh, do we have a timer? Is it going Oh, shit. I'll be right back. Go ahead and start. Okay, all right. So I went with the 2000 film mission to Mars This is a truly anomalous formation it's unlike anything that we've seen so far. We try not to go too nuts up here but we think there's a good chance that this could be water of course that's correct. And we may have found the key to permanent human colonization Yes. Okay, we're ready to light this candle. Let's go to Mars. To abandon ship. For centuries, we've searched for the origin of life on Earth we've been looking on the wrong planet I'm sure both of you have seen even if you may have repressed it. I know I did. This is a not well received movie from 2000 It's pretty low in the numbers. Thank you Rotten Tomatoes score of When he for from critics and 30% from audience so not good budget of $100 million box office have $111 million. Oh, well, there you go. So, a might have hit zero if their advertising was only within 11 million. This however, the reason I chose this movie is because when I was looking at Mars films I was like, this was directed by Brian De Palma, which it was Brian De Palma who has 44 credits whose name including Carrie body double untouchable, Scarface Mission Impossible Snake Eyes and of course, on our show I did sisters. I think Eric, you did body double at one point. That's Kelly. Kelly, I think you did body double at one point. Correct. I remember. Well, it's written by little canon. This is just the only film that he's worked on. But it also Jim and John Thomas, who seemed like a pair of brothers who have done predator executive decision and movies like Wild Wild West together. This is starring Gary Sinise. And in not like this man's face. Gary Sinise. He's a good actor. I just don't like there's something about his face that really wakes me out. That's 56 credits, whose name he is Lieutenant Dan in Forrest Gump. He was also in Of Mice and Men Apollo 13 Green miles think guys and currently is doing some TV stuff including 13 reasons why. And CSI New York, which he did 197 episodes. So well. I guess that's where he went. Tim Robbins is also in this 78 credits to his name. Shawshank Redemption, Jacob's Ladder, Twister Mystic River the player currently also in much love show among us silo. Don Cheadle 112 credits whose name including crash Hotel Rwanda and of course currently in Marvel as Rody. Also, um, he did the recent DuckTales he was the voice of Donald Duck, which was very interesting to me. I know, I was like, Whoa, and he actually has a fair number of animated voice credits that popped up including Captain Planet in a recent Captain Planet. So interesting stuff. We also have Connie Nelson, who's Wonder Woman gladiator soldier 68 credits to her name and Jerry O'Connell from sliders. 134 credits stand by me scream, too. And he's also doing a ton of animated voice work, including lower decks as Commander Jack ransom. So the story, we start off at a party, it almost looks like a kid's birthday party. There's like little rockets going off and a lot of space themed stuff, but it's like what's happening? There's a dude hit none, lady, and he's kind of like, oh, this is my last night. And it could be special with you. And we quickly realized this is not a kid's birthday party, despite all the children running around and there being like cake being served. It is these astronauts is last night on earth before they go to Mars. There is a mission that is to go explore it and see if we could potentially colonize it. And we meet the character chimp Who is Don Cheadle. I'm sorry, Luke. Apologies, Luke is Don Cheadle. He's really nervous about seeing another astronaut who's going to show up Jim, the reason why is because he's become the commander of this mission. All because Jim's wife got sick and died. And he could no longer be in charge. So they kind of make peace they have some drinks. And gyms like is cool, dude, I'm going to be watching you from above. So Jim is going to be on the other side in the space station while Luke and his team go out to Mars. Of course, we cut to Mars. It's happened. They're there. They made it. But there's something weird going on. And they go to check out this metal structure. And all of a sudden, this giant like sand tornado comes at them, and murders. Pretty much everybody except for Luke and I didn't remember this part of this movie. But like there's a guy who gets whipped up into this tornado and literally all of his limbs come off one at a time as you screaming. I was like, This is gonna be a better movie than I thought it was gonna be. So, we then see, Luke is able to send out this sort of really distorted distress signal back to earth into the space station saying something's gone wrong, but They can only pick up little fragments of what he's saying. So mission to save him goes underway. And this time Jim is going to lead it along with a husband and wife, Team Woody and Terry, and the goofy young guy, Phil, of course, these are played by our Tim Robbins, Connie Nelson and Jerry O'Connell. So they're hanging out in the space, they're making their way for a couple of months to go rescue this guy. Obviously, there's a lot of fire under their belt. But it's fine, because we have the most incredible set, there is a giant rotating space set. And it almost seems like a Wes Anderson style thing where you see people walking along the outer edge and you go from room to room. And each room has different people doing different things in it. And it's just so cool to look at. It's I don't know, I was really impressed. They approached Mars and they start, you know, getting ready to land when all of a sudden they hit some asteroids. And when goes straight into the ship ends through one of the dudes hands. And you're like, Oh, he's just bleeding. And you're like, What is this movie? So they follow the blood, they patch the hole. They try to figure out you know how best to get the ship going, but they have to get ready to land. So they're like shit, it's fine. Everything's gonna be fine. Let's land. Turns out not so fine. Most of the ship is pretty fucked up from other asteroid dings. And as they approach Mars, it's called the fuck apart and they have to jump out and tethered to each other and try to get to a piece that broke off which is going to be the module that we use to land Mars into. At this point, the husband and wife team are then under pressure and husband fucks up. I'm not going to say all the details, but I will say you do get to see a man take his own space helmet off in space to prevent further deaths. And see his head turned to giant icicle book in this movie. The second movie? Well, I was under the impression this was like a Disney movie based on the ride. They had to Disneyland. I don't know. I don't think that's what this is. Well, this doesn't happen on the ride spoilers. Ride so I don't know. So I will say once they get to Mars, they find Luke he's got a real Castaway look about him. And he says, oh my god you have you're not gonna believe what I saw. And then of course, they do not believe what he saw, which is a very weird structure on Mars. There's a signal coming out of this strange structure. And of course, they don't believe him until they see his space suit footage. And then they also see the rover footage of the thing. At this point, the movie success. This This is why nobody likes this movie. Let's just say they go in a purchase structure they go in there's a giant CGI alien thing in there. It's real bad. There's a whole thing about how life has come from Mars and they shot their vessel and DNA often to Earth and that's why we exist. And creepo Gary Sinise decides to go off to venture among the stars to meet these aliens. The end its shit to shit ending. But, guys, up until that it is so fucking good. Up until then. Wow. Yeah, the action moments are so good. It's just way more gory and intense and stressful than I ever thought it was. Yeah, just crazy. Um, just a little bit of quick trivia before my timer goes off. The filmmakers created the Martian landscape and a massive sandpit near Vancouver. It was one of the biggest sets ever constructed for a movie around 2 million square feet. The crew used over 14,000 gallons of paint to spray the soil Mars read. Between visuals, miniatures, and animation over 400 technicians were directly involved in production and aspects of the special effects. Many of the props from this movie, including the big turning wheel set in the spacecraft model are now on display in the line queue area for the mission space ride at Epcot in Walt Disney World in Florida. I don't know what that means. I don't know if that does mean it's somehow related. Each one of the spacesuits cost didn't go off. We got about a minute each one of the species costs around$100 to make with a real NASA spacesuit costs about 10 to 12 million and every actor had their own crew to get in the space to in took about 45 minutes. They also weighed 62 pounds. Done is the one that has like a robotic dog? No, no. Okay. All right, well, bottom line, Vanessa. Is this a recommend or no? Oh, God, you know, yeah, I actually would recommend this movie. Just bear in mind it's going to fucking end terribly. But Jesus, it's so good up until then as Brian De Palma like, come on. Brian De Palma. I love that is Brian De Palma. Although when I think of space adventure, his name is not the first that comes to mind. Unless it's like a Hitchcockian murder space adventure. No, I hear you but there's so much design and style that's kind of going on and then it's got the really terrible 90s like space action, which is so fun. From the year 2024 It's so 24 years ago this I wanted to die all right, you want to go next, that chipper note will have night dive into my selection. 10 minutes on the buzzer. Thank you. Going further back to 1964 we have Robinson Crusoe on Mars you will experience all the heart pounding suspense of this first two men space probe traveling more than 71 million Astro miles toward Mars here are all the unexpected terrors of outer space and identify flying mass that add Collision Course. Fire main retros Firing main retros Mars gravity's taking over pulling us down already with Jackson emergency procedure. Last off when you're ready a scorching surface of the fire swamp that is Mars world no man has ever seen and now one man must explore alone a temporary home is found how long can a man stay alive? And my two most difficult problems are air and water. I have with what's left in my tank and one reserve cylinder enough oxygen for about 60 hours. Or once my egg is out water won't matter. You gotta face the reality of being alone forever devastating laser beams with which Spaceman from the constellation Orion excavate the rare minerals of Mars escaping slave worker who becomes a modern man Friday. Store storm of burning ashes whose puree descends on Mars a polar icecap and the wild surface storms that cover the planet with freezing cold. The Holocaust of searing hell when Mars and a flaming asteroid collide and turn the ice cap into molten lava. The violent celestial bombardment of Mars by attacking humanoids from another galaxy there I'm tomatoes is weird on this 194 from critics which Sure 62 from the crowd a little Oh, oh, well. This is available on canopy. So you know library card you can see it for free. Called Pics or rant it's on a several places. This is directed by Byron Haskin. Who might know from Captain Sinbad the adventures of Long John Silver. I say that name right and Treasure Island. He also did special effects for over 50 film including one of my all time favorites Arsenic and Old Lace. Good a lot of stuff written by EB Macare McGuire. Who out Planet of the vampires? Yes. That's race to 2000 the angry red planet and Godzilla Raids Again. Also John C. Higgins who wrote raw deal, Martha Walter Hill film. This 1948 Big House USA Daughters of Satan, and several 1930s Safety style videos. Yes, yes. Fuck yeah. And from the book by Daniel Defoe. Starring, unfortunately, but not totally bad. Instead of Adam West, the main actor in this is Paul manti. He is known for tons of 60s 70s 80s and 90s. TV shows. This man has been in anything and everything because he's that neutral, but square jawed, good looking guy that just plugs into anything is also death rates. 2000 per death rate is Victor London, who plays Friday in the movie, the spin in four episodes of Batman. I live in love and the theory of everything. And it does have Adam West, he opens the movie. And then he subsequently dies in the movie. Fair fairly early on. The best known for you know, Batman, with over 200 credits, all kinds of strange stuff has been so I've been hearing about this movie for years and really interesting. So okay, I got to see this and it's pretty good. Yeah, we get to start off with a cute little monkey in his little flying spacesuit and stress like the like an astronaut and the whole orange outfit and everything. The Adam West opens it. Like I said excellently with his. Also square jawed awesome voice, everything coming in full effect for a little while, as he's trying to keep them from crashing DeMars as you can probably guess this is not a successful quest. Holy shit. This is a scary Mars. They crash to the ground. There's giant flames everywhere. There's huge dust and cloud storms. The the flames not only like in the background, like a giant wall of flame, they occasionally fly through the air. So it's like, wow, Mars is really scary, at least for a little while to estimate its current land on Mars, but are in separate areas. And the one guy Paul started setting up as well. And they, they did some really clever things in this movie. The figures out the flames are coming from or ignited by this one yellow rock that says reminds him of coal. And they start burning it, I'm gone. But they established that Mars has a low oxygen level. So you cannot breathe it. But you can breathe it but it's not enough to sustain a human. So he starts burning this my first thought is how high was the there's enough oxygen to burn. Later on in the movie? He thinks the same thing and figures out that this item creates oxygen and uses it to refill his oxygen tanks. Oh, that's cool. That's really smart. Like that's really cool. And there's a lot of that stuff in this movie. Oh, so it never really comes into play. Which is a little weird because it's so dramatic and its introduction is that Paul does have a gun. And by gun I mean Dirty Harry's Hand Cannon Yeah, he opens it up as like all these shades What do you shoot with that? Nothing you know the old adage in film right screenwriting if you show a gun in the opening scene, somebody gets shot by the third act. Nope. Because it's rolling in his grave. So cool. So he begins to explore Mars and they the air thing gets a little weird until he looks like he's opening his thing. Putting it down opening it like is it bad? There's a good lol it's the 60s That's the 60s. Mission to Mars. Most they say most of the first half of the movie is just him figuring out how to survive and finding shelter and how to make fire and figuring out the oxygen and playing with his little monkey that has a little for loincloth. One part where the monkey is sitting on a rock squatting legs up like it's a little like Glasgow loafer like glass covering his delicate. Like, okay. Exactly, yes. And about halfway through the movie he finds another Well, I mean, it looks like a human that didn't try to create an enemy mind kind of alien or anything like that. They just, it's just a guy and figures out he's a slave. So Paul immediately begins yelling at him, parading him through, don't touch these things. Don't do this. Oh, well. But it doesn't seem to bother his guy Friday. Which, you know, he starts to call him and even gives a shout out to to the author when he calls him Friday with a with apologies to Eric. All right, it's like, that's, that's nice. So this is a smartly written movie. There's a lot of things in here that come together really well. And it's kind of ridiculous looking. But it's really cool. And it's ridiculousness, and like the place he lives, there's all kinds of like, bright colored crystal, things on the walls and Technicolor level of walls around him. And it's just like, that seems a bit much but I don't care. It looks really cool. And it has that weird effect when you're watching a movie that's probably 90% shot on sets. Where it looks really bad at first, but the more you watch it, the more you get used to it and it looks just fine. This movie does that really well. Robinson Crusoe on Mars is a director's tour de force as someone says. The director said nobody interfered with him. He said it's the most freedom he's ever had outside, since he'd made the world the world's movie. And he said he had almost complete autonomy. And it was a general pleasure and fulfillment for Bill Robinson Crusoe on Mars. Also fulfilling as cinematography has ever been. Everything he set out to do, he said he was able to accomplish it's a great example of letting our tour do what they do. Because it's this movie shouldn't work. There's so many weird things that go on, but it absolutely does. And it gets a little slow a little while it's almost a two hour film. Probably would have been a really cracking 90 minute movie. But that's okay. still fun to watch. The this the effects are a little weird at times. When you see a spaceship. It is literally a two dimensional animated cartoon. It's so good. You see a lot of them because for some reason, and this is one of the storyline things that's a little weird in the movie. The aliens. The way it's set out because the alien from someplace else come in spaceships, kill all the slaves and leave except for the one guy Friday who escapes. But they keep coming back to kill him. I'm like, what? Why do you care? Leave them on the planet to die or whatever if you because it says they're done mining, whatever they were mining. So Mike, this is a little weird. Because it's like three or four ships show up 10 times maybe trying to kill him. But again, it's a really good movie size okay with it. And to give you an idea of how solidly foot put together this movie is, criterion, put it out in 19, or no how media put out 1993 and laserdisc by Criterion, then criterion release it again on DVD. And they've released it again on Blu ray. So they have a strong support for this film. And I think it's well deserved. I think the title hurts it a lot. It's just weird sounding. Yeah. But yeah. So it's also very family film feeling. It feels like it's Disney right now. But it feels kind of like a Disney click. Yeah, yeah, it's definitely very family. And it was it when it first came out. It got massive good reviews and the buzz was great, but then just completely flopped at a sequel ready to go and everything but it just laughed at the box office. So I liked this movie quite a bit. Okay, let's see. I guess. Okay, you're ready. My movie? Not as good. Oh no. Still on see? 10 minutes me need 10 minutes now. I need one I chose from 1959 angry the angry red planet. Is there life on Mars? For centuries we have wandered. Now for the first time through the new photographic miracle of cinemagic. You will see the wonders of this strange and terrifying world when you see the angry red planet. Join this daring crew, the first and the scientific race between nations to attempt to land on Mars 987654321 Fire Blast off from Earth with courageous astronauts Gerald Moore Nora Hayden. Let's terrain Jack crucian traveled 1000s of miles through space to the unknown cinemagic is not been shown to you now. But there's wildland comes alive in cinemagic. You will see buildings miles high in cinemagic. Journey to the Center of southern terror in cinema. be trapped by the tentacles of man devouring plants in cinematic feel a fire hot breath of a 40 foot monster as it reaches for you. In cinematic Your eyes will see the wonders of a world no eyes in this world have ever seen before we ever get back to which had a budget of $190,000 I could find no box office information. Nor could I find any Rotten Tomatoes critics information or audience information written and directed. Five years before your film Eric by EB Melchior with an assist by Sidney W pink, six directing credits and 20 writing credits all the movies you talked about Eric Robinson Crusoe and Mars of course planet of vampires definitely 2013 Demons street reptile circus and journey to the seventh planet the guy has a hard on for sci fi movie so gotta like that. Yep. This stars Gerald Moore who has 155 credits mostly TV but also one dangerous night. The truth about murder dragonfly Squadron and my world die screaming sounds good. Nice. Yeah. And also stars Nora Hayden, who has 35 credits including plunder Road, high school confidential and operation camel. And less romaine, who has 135 credits, including War of the Worlds Forbidden Planet and the monolith monsters. So okay, angry red planet, you guys. We opened in the middle of a crisis. A group of high level mucky mucks are having an emergency meeting at the Pentagon. It seems that the experimental rocket ship Mr. One assumed destroyed when they lost contact with a 61 days ago as it approached Mars has now been detected in orbit around Earth, who, in Nevada they're able to regain remote control of the rocket and bring it to touchdown, but we are unsure what has happened to the crew. We get newspaper headlines spinning across the screen that say is Mars rocket crew alive. And then we get earlier broadcast footage of the crew which was Colonel Tom, Dr. Iris, Professor Theodore and Chief Warrant Officer Sam. So when the rocket ship lands, the military's there and they check it out for radiation and all of that and then all of a sudden the door of the rocket opens. And it is it's one of these doors that opens and then turns into a ramp like every good wheelchair access. Yes. And and we get a lone female exiting the ship. It is Iris the doctor and she tells them that the colonel is in there and he needs help. So they bring him out on a stretcher and his entire arm is covered in this awful goo. When Iris is told that everything that can be done for Tom will be done. Her reply is and I'm not kidding. Hey, how can anyone cope with that? Gooey arms man that's rough. At the hospital Tom is being treated but everyone has stumped about what is growing all over his arm, but it's definitely getting bigger. And one of the doctors suggests that the tapes from the spacecraft might give them some clues, except they all seem to have been erased. They talked to Iris and she's frustrated because she can't seem to remember what exactly happened to Tom because this is the 1950s and she has only a one card. So doctors asked her to start at the beginning and see what she remembers. And the rest of the film was her recounting the strange tale of rocket ship. Mr. What? Guys, this rocket ship is some low class bullshit. But that was the entire movie. While they're in the rocketship, they sit on office chairs in front of consoles. Oh my god. There's no mention of why or how the ship has gravity inside of it. But they all just wander about like Office buddies staring out the window and talking about life and Leave It to Beaver Style dialog. admits to Tom that she's a little afraid. He tells her they all are and she responds with knocking. It's not just me then being a woman. I thought man wow 47 days later they are orbiting Mars is a very fast rocketship decide to land and claim the planet in the name of Brooklyn as the Warrant Officer suggests, cool and Iris looks out the window she is confronted by the ghastly visage of a three eyed monster. She screams and she is suddenly back in the hospital recounting the story. She tells them that she simply can't remember what happened next, and the doctor explains her mind refuses to remember. He speculates that the alien infection on Tom could spread to all humans and that every moment counts and proposes a narco synthesis that also states our mind might snap if we forced her to remember the horror she has so carefully obliterated from her conscious level. She agrees to do it, sir. So even though she saw a monster out there, they all decide to go out and explore. I note here for all of you film lovers, we are now experiencing in capital letters cinemagic, which seems to be placing a solarized red filter over the camera lens so that everything looks kind of red negative. It's ugly, and it looks bad, but probably hides a multitude of low budget muscle effects that are coming our way. The Martian landscape is a veritable jungle of plants and trees that we also have on earth strangely, but some other weird alien plants too like a giant venus flytrap that attacks them. But luckily, Sam has an ultrasonic freeze gun, which doesn't even have a fucking array, you guys, so I have no idea how NOFA was working. He points it and then the meters flytrap freezes in his track. That's the only way you know it's working. Oh, there's no fucking sound. There's no fucking Ray. Oh, no, no, they decided to go back to the ship they had enough exploring for the day. And the professor theorizes that they are being watched and that the plant attacking them was probably under the control of whatever rules the strange planet. So the next morning they decided to go out exploring again. And and they are attacked by this amazing huge Ratbat spider puppet and they barely escaped with their lives. If you've ever seen any picture from this movie, it is this monster which is kind of adorable. Back at the rocket ship, they decided it's time to fucking go home this place sucks. But there is a strange force stopping the rocket from leaving. So they decided to cross a huge lake towards a Martian city with skyscrapers a mile tall. But before they can get to the sea begins to boil and another creature is attacking them. So they run back to the ship. And Sam has to sacrifice himself so the rest of the crew can escape. And I'll just tell you this. This is clearly this is for you nerds out there. This is clearly where the idea of the gelatinous cube comes from and Dungeons and Dragons because Sam gets sucked into it and then we see him dissolve and it is the best effect in the film. It's clearly just a time lapse. You know they they've got a picture of him and then they fade into like a skeleton of him. Nicely done. This is exactly and then the skeleton just disappears. off the ship there attack Then surrounded by this huge jello monster, and the professor has the heart attack and dies. So now it's just Tom and Iris. And they quickly realize that Tom has been infected by this jello monster. Well, Iris be able to pilot the ship back to Earth on our own. He is just a woman sits. So will they be able to save Tom? Well, I mean, she does get the ship vector Earth and then we do have another fucking third act where they race to figure out Tom's issues. But they also get one last recording from the ship that did survive and it is recording from the King of Mars or whatever the fuck he is. And he basically chastises humanity for being technological adults but spiritual and emotional infants and a stay away from Mars if you know what's good for you. It's all quite. Tongue. Tag tagline cites beyond belief, I bet. Trivia the cinematic process used for all scenes on the surface of Mars was the result of an attempt by producer Norman Mauer to turn live action footage directly into hand drawn animation or to stimulate or simulate that. This would enable hand drawn backgrounds to look as real or as unreal as the live action footage. It does not have that effect in this movie. Although the producers have planned to do the outdoor budget, you want to hear this video and you plan to do the outdoor scenes quote on the cheap. Anyway, hey, the cinematic process so disguised and obscure the appearance that even cheaper sets can be used. Sidney pink, the writer says are set for the planet Mars cost us a couple $100 instead of the 1000s we had estimated. Bonus three the alien monster is the same one featured on the cover of the album walk among us by the misfits. And finally, the screenplay was written on Sidney Pink's kitchen table, recruiting his children into act his critics. His initial draft was called the planet Mars and included all sorts of strange creatures and an entire Martian city. Naturally, budgetary restraints precluded all that. Naturally. Yes, that sounds god awful, Kelly. You know what? It wasn't the worst Mars movie I watched for this genre. I watched something called Mission Mars. Oh, no, it had. What's his name in it called check the old man from Oh, Christmas story. And that movie was even worse. They walk around Mars, with these face plates that don't fit. It's basically motorcycle helmets, the face plates don't seal off anything. And when I did research on that film, I found out and I think this is why they were doing this in your film, Eric, then, up until the 70s, we thought that there was probably limited oxygen on Mars. And that there were there were ways that you could walk around on Mars with just the help of a, like a nose breather and stuff like that. So kind of crazy to think that, you know, in our lifetime, we have been this stupid about everything. It's incredible. Yeah, I mean, now, if you look at me to think that, but scientists thought this. Oh, he should have watched moonshot. Moonshot was one of the ones I put on the list. And then I was like, I ain't paying for that shit. In fairness, I do that thing where you can tell Amazon to deliver something a few days later. And then it means most of my movies are like $1 Oh, interesting. Yeah, I didn't pay much. I'll tell you what. Well, I you know, I looked at your mission to Mars movie. And I looked at something else. Like a Red Planet, I think was the other one that came out the same time as Mars with the different cast of that must be the one with the robotic dog. And that one is just junk right from the start. So I was really surprised that that the Mars movies are pretty bad. I could have done yeah, Ghosts of Mars. But ya know, saying, Well, yeah, Marsha, and I kind of felt like that was too straight of a film for me, then yeah, and then I'd already done on era and I was kind of kicking myself because I was like, they're also going to win, but it's also terrible. I've made that movie. So what's with this sub genre? Lots of cool Invaders from Mars. Yes, but But going to Mars. Pretty good. Not so good. Oh, well. It was in theory it sounded fun fun on paper. Thanks, Tom financial. Well, you never told us to Tom in the movie got rescued. I need to know. In my movie, yeah. Do you really want to know? Did he make it? He made it. Okay. I'm never gonna see this film. He made it because Iris figured out, she remember he could, yes. She figured out which is a shot because she's only a woman. But she figured out that by putting these like minut electrical charges on him that this thing would leap off of him and go to this other piece of fungus that they had built for it to be on. And now they can study the world of Mars. However, this warning has come you know, which was basically get the fuck off my lawn. Yeah. Fuck, dude. All right. That's all I needed. That's all I needed for that. Maybe. Let's see, Eric, I think is your choice for the next step genre. Yes, it is. I think this might lead to better stuff. Kind of a potential wide thing. Some movies the hope? Yes. That a radio or TV broadcast plays a prominent role in the story of what is going on, you know, like poltergeist or something like that. I like I'd say the howling but spoiler we're gonna be talking about that. upcoming live show. Yeah. Where Dante will drop by a little stick his head in and he'll be like, are you guys talking about that howling? FOC you know, I made that movie. Really come in and tell us about it. Can I? Can I rap with you kids for a minute? The sad thing is he would look at us and call us kids. I'm looking forward to seeing Joe Dante. I've been trying to find a good howling poster. But you know what? I'm gonna Okay, another spoiler. Not my favorite Joe. Dante. Phil. What's your favorite? I'm I'm not dragging. I think I think I like maybe interspace Oh, better. Oh, sorry. Understand one's Gremlins two. For sure. Yeah. Gremlins is great. You've seen that name? Oh, it's so good. Yeah. I still remember old man moment here. Seeing Gremlins in the theater. When we didn't know what kind of movie it was gonna be. And she pops that Gremlin in the microwave. I'm like, Oh, God, like this is why we have PG 13 movies. I was gonna say once you tell me that this was one of the films that got everybody up in to get their panties in a bunch. Yep. Okay, so we're talking broadcast films next week. So this is the part where I remember to bring in the paper that has the stuff that we're supposed to talk about, like saying thanks for everybody liking and sharing posts for participating in value value model, or jumping in on the subscription plans, which a couple of you guys have done, which is really really nice, where we just take money right out of your fucking bank account monthly. Thank you. Thank you. Like criminals. It goes towards real things like mics and chairs and stands and the ability to also do things like live shows. So yeah, yeah, not only that, but you know, it costs money to run website for a year and to you know, host the stock, I assume it costs money Eric take care of. We just let Eric do all the hard bits very much. This is accurate. 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