Michelob Ultra Organic Seltzer Taste Test

Zero sugar, low carbs, organic ingredients, and “filtered six times” sounds like a win, but the real question is simple: do these hard seltzers taste good when you crack one after a long, brutal day? We put Michelob Ultra Organic Seltzers to the test and give honest, flavor-first ratings across Cucumber Lime, Grapefruit Melon, Watermelon Strawberry, and Spicy Pineapple. Some hit with a refreshing first sip, others fade into flavored water, and one scent sends the whole room into a full-body nope.

Between pours, we talk about the kind of week that drives you to the cooler: punishing heat at work, smoke drifting down from Canada wildfires, and that campfire smell that follows you everywhere. Then we rewind to a bachelor party camping trip with canoeing, island nights, surprise storms, tarp engineering, and the hilarious “we just walked in with nine people” energy that takes over any bar.

After the break, we get into “Ricky’s Bad Choices,” a confession-style question game that escalates into stories about jail bailouts, messy decisions, and a couple of road-accident moments that turn unexpectedly serious. We wrap with final rankings, what we would actually buy again, and our standing rule for any drinking night.

If you like real drink reviews, unfiltered storytelling, and a few hard-earned life lessons, hit subscribe, share this with a friend, and leave a review so more people can find the show.

Transcript

Cucumber Lime First Impressions

SPEAKER_01 0:31

Welcome to another reason to drink. I'm your hostess, the most is the princess of the show, and I'm here with my sidekick, my side host, Ricky Rick DR, whatever you want to go by. Hey, tonight we gotta big little dick. Big dick little dick, big little dick. I'm gonna be big little. Oh, big little dick. Yeah, we're gonna do Michelope Ultra Organic Seltzers tonight. And we're gonna start off with cucumber lime. Which and these are zero sugars, zero calories, and eighty or no, zero or zero sugars, eighty calories, zero carbs. Correct. And it comes in a four-pack, if you could see on the YouTube channel, you can see that it comes with the cucumber lime, the grapefruit, uh melon, and spicy pineapple, and and it has what's the last one? Watermelon, strawberry. Watermelon, strawberry, and we'll do that one last, of course. Well, that'll be nice. Every time I hear that watermelon strawberry, I think of that song. I don't like it though. You don't? You already tried it? I no, but I just thought I like I just I have a feeling my water but watermelon strawberry is gonna be the my don't like my least favorite. Okay, from before you taste them, which one you think is gonna be your your most favorite? I think I'm gonna like the cucumber and the spicy, of course. I think I'll like the watermelon and I'll like the grapefruit too, though. I don't know yeah, I think I might like the grapefruit. Yeah, so we'll we'll give it a shot here. Let's see. Cucumber lime, though, that's a good one. It smells good, it smells refreshing. A good night to do this show because it is hot, smoky outside. You know, we got all that smoke from Canada. From Canada, yeah. Actually, this is refreshing so far. This is very good. This is the cucumber one, yeah. A cucumber lime. I mean, it almost reminds it's a mule. Oh, yeah. You know what I mean? Do a cucumber mule. Yeah. Get some dude. I got some Woodfords down there we could throw in here. You know what though? It almost kind of tastes like there's mint in it. Do you get a little mint flavor? That's why maybe that's why I thought right off the water. Maybe the I don't it's hard to really taste the lime, but I don't know. Maybe it's the cucumber that gives it the it's the cucumber that is the flavor. Yeah. Now, are you getting any flavor after that besides diet? Except for what? Diet. Like a diet I know what you're getting after it clears. Let me get one more and think about it when I'm doing it, right? Because it's good going down. Yeah, and then it flattens out a little bit or something. There's something like the whole no sugar added. It's not sweet. It's not sweet, no. No, no, it's kind of refreshing, but you know, as hot as it was when we first when I first came over here, I was thirsty. I was sweating. I I got a couple quick cold ice ones. Rick had some in a cooler, still thirsty all day. Yes, yeah, and it's been one of them days. Yes, my day started early and it went late. I was like, okay, I am done, guys. You know, you gotta love them days, gotta love them days, and it was hot. It was hot. Yeah, and yeah, I bet you were sweating. Oh, yeah, I was sweating all day. And that AC was I've been sweating for the whole week. The whole week. You know what I mean? Like, I like it, it's been kind of weird. I mean, well, not really. It's weird. It almost took me two days to sweat out all the beers from the weekend. Did you drink Friday? I mean, did you drink Monday? I had a couple, you had a couple, but not crazy, nothing crazy or anything, but so Rick, Rick, uh, you know, hey, what we do this week.

Camping Bachelor Party Recap

SPEAKER_01 4:23

Oh, we had a great weekend. We did uh we went up to we went and spent the night on I an island, we canoeed down, kayaked down. Yeah. Kinda my son's bachelor party. He's getting married in October, and then we went and spent another night in Franklin PAA. So it was a good time. It was a damn good time. Uh I stayed up entirely way too long. And then you got a little sleep, little sleep, and so I think that's why it took two days for it all to finally spread out. It was a but like I didn't get hammered, you know what I mean? Like, I just sat up bullshitting with him, and you're late. It was your night just went late. It yeah, yeah, which I'm not used to. No, because I'm an old man now. But you said you called it because you said uh we I I remember him, we looked, it was like nine something because we made a comment how light it was still, right? And Rick said, Oh, it's only nine, it was like nine thirty. He's like, It's only nine thirty. I'm like, Yeah, he says, Oh man, the next few hours are gonna go quick because what's gonna happen is we're gonna get BSing. And then and then boom, before you know it, it's fucking four o'clock in the morning. Like, and it was holy shit. I heard you giggling all night. I said, I'm surprised Rick doesn't have a six pack as much as he was laughing. I had a great time, yeah, dude. I really did. I did have a great time, and thank you all. You know, thank everybody that was in there and went with us. There was eight of us. Eight of us, it was a good group. Yeah, and then a nine on the hotel. And that was kind of cool too. When we were nine, and we would go into a a bar or a restaurant or anywhere, even when we went to talk about that cornhole thing. We we we there we had such a presence because there was nine. So many of us, yeah. Yeah, we all we instantly filled the room. We're not small people, really. You see the show, yeah. This camera puts on 40 pounds, but yeah, absolutely, yeah. Yeah, so I mean, we just all walk in like hey, yeah, and one after another after another, yeah. We all kind of just and we all have our own personalities, yeah. But uh it was funny. My brother Mark did say when we were walking down the road, he goes, Wow, he goes, What do you think people are thinking when they see all of us walk down the road? Because yeah, there's such a neglect or uh what's that word? Uh oh, it starts with an N, not the one that you you're thinking of. Uh no, it's maybe it's not an N. Uh glectic. You know what I mean? Like, I know what you guys. Yeah, yeah. It's such a different. We were all we all come from different walks of family. We all like whatever. And we all look different, we all look different, and so it was it was just a really yeah, glectic. Collective? Collective, that could be yeah, that you could feel that. I'm sure somebody will tell us they're already a stupid ass. You dumb fucking asses. But but we're already 20 beers in, anyways. I'm already 72 hours in. As far as cooking goes, though, we didn't really do any special. We did burgers on the burgers over the fire, and then we ate breakfast over the fire. Yeah, the only unique thing we ate is that we have Taylor Squid Greg with us, and he eat he ate a bean hamburger or whatever. Yeah, I was so worried. I'm so glad your brother was there, and I'm so glad that he kind of took over on them because I was just like, okay. But it was also, I mean, I'm always glad he's there.

SPEAKER_00 8:07

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 8:08

But he uh I would just put him on, and then dude, he would just take over. It was awesome. Yeah, like I was just like, okay, and then he finished it. He ended up cooking breath to send dinner, yeah. Kind of ish, yeah. Yeah, he put the hamburger together, yeah. Rick threw the first burgers on. Yeah, and then I was like, yeah, then he just kind of took over. I'm like, hell yeah. But the bean burgers was the only unique thing, and it had corn in it. Dude, they look like they were already falling apart. Yes, they look like shit already. I would have probably black bean, black bean, corn, whatever. But I like so do you cook them frozen? I don't know. Like, I'm thinking that you almost have to cook over an open fire, or a pan, or a pan, yeah. One of the two. You put a little oil with the pan, they would have probably did. Yeah, I didn't understand. He said they were very good, though. Yeah, I didn't understand the concept, but yeah, and he also said that he would have rather stayed on the island. Yes, yeah, he did say that. Yeah, he said that a couple times. I'm like, oh, like I get it. Yeah, like, but now you've been there for a two-night on the island. So it's fun, yes, it is, and you get very relaxed. I even I enjoyed going into town. My only thing is is because when we were rolling in people, it was it rained on us. That prolonged the setup, dude. That was yes, like we got poured on, poured on. We got drenched, it opened up thunderstorms, yeah. We actually had to tip out canoes and kayaks because we got that much rain in a good what 45 minutes. Yeah, and then we got a little break, and then we got another wave, right? But we were able when we got that little break, we were able to get up a shelter, uh shelter, whatever. And then what the why so uh mine's still running, let it go, yeah, yeah. But so we were we didn't know. You did it, you were behind me. You think it would I didn't do anything, yeah. I don't know. Nah, uh, someone just got mad because it was different content. Yeah, yeah. Anyways, we did we did a TikTok, and the TikTok was about these pregnant women, and the guy would come behind and lift the baby. Lift the belly up and put it on the so Billy came up behind me and lifted my beer belly up and put it on the table, and I put my head back like I was enjoying it, which I was not. It just makes me feel how fat I am. But it was still funny, and then it got banned already. It's already got banned, it's probably taken off. This is why we can't do anything on TikTok. This is why we can simple humor. Yeah, that's yeah, or some people don't understand. Yeah, I don't know. I don't know, because it's a beautiful baby, yeah. And I have a baby coming too. How do you know I'm not a he, she, her, him? It and yeah, I and you feel I already I do have a baby coming out. It's a fucking baby elephant, and the trunk's already hanging out. And in another couple weeks, I'm gonna get the ears and the poop. And the poop. No, no, not a poop. Elephant, a baby elephant. But yeah, I would it that's kind of like our humor. So I thought it was funny. Yeah, if you don't like it. I mean, a lot of people don't like it because we got banned from TikTok. So we're always getting banned. Yeah. Wow. Again, really, yeah. And that was on your account, there, she woman? The main one. Huh? Dang. Hell yeah. That's good. Good for us. Let it roll. Let it roll. I'm just gonna let it keep rolling. Yeah. If I go back up. Oh no, still rolling, still rolling. And we're up to uh 72,000 hearts. Yeah, no way. So just let it roll. I think we're good. We'll be fine. Anyways, so the the bean things threw some cheese on it, good to go. Evidently he loved them. He said they were very good. Oh, going for the second night because of the rain, it's like you didn't get that as much relaxation because it did go later in the night. And then we woke up, and then the first thing we had to kind of do is because we thought another storm was coming in, was we had a bunch of tarps and tarps up. We didn't want our I mean, I didn't want my tent to get wet. We did also go a little overboard on the kite strings and everything. Oh, that was crazy. Yeah, I don't know. I slept through it. No, you woke up and it was down. You probably was like, hell yeah. He was snoring like a monk. So I already just walked through with a knife and went clip, clip, clip. Well, one or two got cut. Yeah, I'm sure. Yeah, we just cut it where the knot was. We're not, we're like not messing with this nut. Yeah, and I'm not. Okay, I got down a little bit on this Mikelobaltra. What are you what are you thinking? I like the first taste. Yeah. Uh the aftermath is not so well. Yeah. I do like the first taste of it. It has a good flavor. I mean, I could get through it. Do we want to rate as we go? I would say. Okay. So if we're so why don't we just do this? We're just rating because it's this is also a seltzer. Yes, yeah, yeah. You know what I mean? So we're just gonna rate it by flavor. Okay. And yeah, go from there. Because the most seltzers are just flavor. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So I'm on this flavor, I'm a good I'll go seven. Ah, see, I was between a seven and eight, so I'll go seven and a half. Because I was thinking I thought seven, and I was like, nah, maybe eight. I'm a huge cubecumber fan. So like uh I'll I'll come up to eight. I like I just I'm trying not to. No, no, seven and a half. Yeah, we'll go seven and a half. Oh, all right. You'll meet me seven and a half and halfway seven and a half, yeah. Because only four percent alcohol, too. Yes, yeah, so we're just drinking water, yeah. So I mean I feel a little bloated from the that's what I'm worried about. Like, are we going to end up with a swell up looking and then half the other half the shirt show is gonna be like yeah. I mean, it does have a very good cucumber taste. It does. It like yeah, at least that's lingering. Yeah, you're ready to switch over to the because we gotta do two in each half.

Grapefruit Melon Review And Ratings

SPEAKER_01 14:39

Oh, Jesus. You're ready to switch to the yeah, let's go. Yeah, we're gonna make this quick. Yeah, here we go. So, one thing is why Rick says quick, too, is because man, it's been a long week. Rick's been working 12s and the heat, and I've been working long days, and they eat and not sleeping. Oh, smell that that smells good. Dang, that smells good. Well, the other one smelled good. It did, and this is the grapefruit melon. Hmm, I gotta give it a minute. Gotta give this one a minute because we just came off the my tongue. Still has a little bit of that. The cucumber. And they're making it a sour. It's almost making it a sour. Yeah. So cucumber, grapefruit. Dude, it would almost give you a sour and refreshment. Refreshment at the same time. Because that's what I just had.

SPEAKER_00 15:36

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 15:36

Evidently, that's what I just drank. Because that's all I taste is I'm already man. Yeah. I don't know how good seltzers are for us. Aren't they water? Yeah. So it says these things have been filtered six times. Six times filtration, high quality, organic ingredients. So gluten-free. Why not not filter it so many times? Give us a little bit of alcohol, and we'll take a little bit of sugar and a couple carbs. Who gives a fuck? They're like, drink the regular one then. They don't have the regular in this. No. Now your your brother drinks McUltra Gold. Gold organic. Yes. Yes. So when I first seen these, I was like thinking that's what we were doing. Yeah, yeah. They were like beers, just flavored beers, but yeah. And I actually this one is a l- I'm I'm let me have one more drink. Hold on. I I know what you're saying. I'm thinking. So this is a very slight hint of grapefruit on the front, and the rest is water. Yep. It's the rest is water. There's no, there's no other flavor. There's no more. No, there's no more. It's just it's a little bit of it smells great. It's almost like if you would just squeeze a two drops of grapefruit in your water. Yeah. This is it. Yeah. So I don't think work's gonna work mind. Work's not gonna mind me. Or even you know how you do lemon and water? Yeah, yeah. That's what I'm saying. At a restaurant, it's basically grapefruit. A little bit of grapefruit. Because I don't taste the melon. No. Now, would you now just putting this out here? Pour this in a glass, throw a grapefruit slice on it, right? And sugarcoat the rim. You know how they have that grapefruit. I wouldn't sugar. Yeah, I I yeah, but I don't think I'd if anything, I'd throw a fucking shot of tequila in it. Yeah. Yeah. But throw a tequila might be overpowering. Nah, I don't know. I I think a shot of tequila would actually it would calm it down enough. Yeah. You know what I mean? Then I I think that would be good. Yeah. It's not bad. We're we actually it's not we actually like Michelope, you know. We do like Michelobe. I'm drinking a Paps Lake today, but Rick's got a regular ultra over there. Yeah, I'm not banging McUltra. I just these are not my but they're salcers. Yeah, yeah, they're not beautiful. They're saucers. Saucers. Saucers. Hey, but what else happened

Work Heat And Canada Smoke

SPEAKER_01 18:27

your week? Make you drink this week. I know the long days. I dude, I just work's just crazy and whatever. Like I'm not even gonna get into it. It just works outside. The smoke was crazy, ain't it? Absolutely ridiculous. Which I know we had it a couple years ago, but I think this is the worst. This is the worst. Yeah, yeah. They say it. I mean, when I was coming this morning, I thought it was fog. So now, what did you guys do for your employees? Ventilation. Just ventilation. Yeah. Now, do you guys have your doors open and everything? Um, they do have some open. No, they're not AC, but they have a lot of exhaust fans out and stuff. All right. Now, there was people starting to complain towards the end of the day, yeah, because it's just getting worse. It's getting bad, right? Yeah, yeah. They say even like tomorrow. I mean, I'm amazed that a fire can happen so far away that it looks like we're in Rick's backyard and he's got a fire there. It's that heavy. It was it was rough, dude. Like it was crazy today. It smells like a campfire everywhere. Yeah, yeah. They said actually, when you're driving your car, you should just do the circulation in your vehicle. Not uh Well, see, and I was talking on the way home and it was hot as shit. Yeah. So I had I had the AC on. Yeah. And I smelt it more than. Yeah. Like I had to stop it. Like I had to shut it off. I'm like, you think because you were pulling it in, or did you driving through it? You know what I mean? Like we're just it's just coming in. Well, something they said to circulate in your vehicle, you know, versus getting the fresh air from outside. I I would I didn't smell it as much if I did it from the outside, though. Oh, that's right. If I put all the windows down. No, no, not that one I'm saying. I know, yeah, I get what you're saying, but yeah, I don't know. Just so it was just hitting me in my face. It probably was. Yeah. Yeah. Because it's not as the wind would be. It's still picking that up. Yeah. It was it was pretty bad. I I was like, man, I was like, I didn't know it was this boggy. And it was more coming this way. Not so much where I live, but coming this way. Right. And then, yeah, and then the police started saying they're, you know, their throat's a little scratchy. Yeah. I I heard that all day long. And irritated. Yeah, I actually uh and I don't get headaches. Very rarely do I get a headache. But you did today. And like it was just there. Yeah. You know what I mean? After a little bit. I got there at four o'clock in the morning. So and then five. That's a long day. By 10 o'clock. I'm like, oh yeah, that's uh this is getting kind of bad. I mean, not really, but like I never took an aspirin. When do you take lunch when you get there at four? Uh 11. Eleven? Yeah. Yeah. You go that long. You're used to eating at eleven. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, because that seems long. If I went in at four, I'd be like, hey, let me eat at like ten. No. No, like I'll I'll go out and have a cigarette at like seven. Yeah. Go and maybe nine. Get a drink or whatever. Get a drink. I drink water. That's all I drink. It's drinking water all day. But then you run out and have another cigarette. You work in the heat, you're not AC, right? No. Yeah. Yeah, no. Yeah, same here. I um and and they put an oven. They just build an oven in my building. Really? Which was perfect. Because it used to be a warehouse, and then they put an oven in there. Only time that comes in. Benefit is in the winter. Yeah. Yeah. We got two ovens. You know, there's a pat and I it's great. Yeah. In the summer you walk through, you're like, oh, you poor bastards. Yeah. Yeah. It's like, oh, wait, don't step on my ball. That just melted off. It just fucking dropped. Yeah. Yeah. I gotta pick that up, save it. It's like an incub, incubator. Incubator. Yeah. My my my baby would have came out a lot quicker. My baby elephant. So all right. Let's rate this. Yeah. Are we going to rate this? Yeah. Yeah, because I mean we're moving right along. As far as my week goes, oh, yeah. There wasn't really much. We had we come off of a good, relaxed weekend. Oh, you're alone. Yeah. Puppies by myself. Mama's gone. It's party time. You know what? You don't get no party time. It goes so damn fast. Yeah. And then you got three dogs and a chorelist and survival. Oolly woolly woolly. Yeah. Anyways, what do you think of this? Grapefruit. Um, I think the flavor, it's actually, I think, easier to get down than the cucumber one. It is. And it doesn't put as much aftertaste in my mouth. It is. Exactly. Yeah. It's so now like I don't think it's as refreshing flavor-ish, but but at the beginning, because it's grapefruit, I'm like, it's a shanty, whatever. Yeah. I don't think any of them are gonna like I I'm gonna just stay with the 7.5 again. I was gonna go eight on this one. I like I'll I'll stay with the 7.5. Just say 7.5. Yeah, because I was thinking eight just because I think I could drink this one over the watermelon one. If I mean if I was at a bar or something and was like, yeah, which one would you order? I would probably go with the grapefruit. Yeah. Right now, yeah. Yeah, like I would go with the grapefruit. That's why I went eight. I love cucumber. Yeah. So if they are out of the grapefruit, as of right now, we still have two more to go. I would probably go with the cucumber. You know, I'd be like, all right, yeah, I'll do a cucumber. Yeah. But at the end of the day, I don't think they're any of them are good. No. Really. Like I wouldn't, I wouldn't waste my money. Yeah. You wouldn't keep them, Jason Creba? No. No, I wouldn't. Now, Princess Approved, yes, because these are going down. Yeah. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 24:26

Yeah. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 24:27

But I wouldn't keep them though. I wouldn't keep them.

unknown 24:30

No.

SPEAKER_01 24:30

They if but I don't know if we're real big. If you see these in my fridge, it's because it's left over from the podcast. Yeah. Yeah. And help yourself. Yeah. Feel free. Take them with you. Here you go, neighbor. You gotta try these. Yeah. Have them all. But, anyways, we're gonna take a quick, quick, quick break. And what we're gonna do is we'll get into answer these, Ricky's bad choices, bad choices, and then we'll jump into the next two ultra self. Dude, we're at 8,000 hearts. Oh wow, can't believe it. 8,000 hearts. Oh, anyways. Okay, go watch our TikTok. Anyways, we'll talk to you soon. You can't find it no more. It got banned. It got banned. Okay, late. We'll be right back.

Watermelon Strawberry Smell Test Fail

SPEAKER_01 25:46

Well what? Said smoke at man. Fucking Canada. Canada. Hey, we're gonna do the watermelon strawberry. Hey, hey, hey, we're gonna do a watermelon. Smell wise, I do not like it. Making us all such smells like puke. Oh, I don't want to smell it, though. Oh, it does. Dude, that smells exactly like puke. It does smell like puke. It's a taste. Like puke. No. It actually tastes pretty good. I'm not a big fake watermelon fan. And then you add strawberry to it. That's it's not bad. It's not bad. I gotta let my mouth uh get the old grapefruit out of that. Ooh. Yeah, what do you think? Ooh. I know you're not a big guy. We're gonna rate this right now. No. You gotta get a little bit more than just two six. I mean, I'll give it, I'll give it a good one. Well, you know what? We'll do some answer this. We'll take a break halfway through answer this or Ricky's bad choices. And then we'll rate this. Dude, that's gonna make me puke. Because like now I'm back to throw-up. It it does have a back taste. It does have a very bad back taste. I keep getting throw up in my mind. Now that you told me that, it does stick in it. You put it back in. I was kind of going through it. But no, I took another sip. I'm like, ooh. Yeah. Ooh, that's almost like uh but it's kind of like really artificial. Like back in 21, yeah, like back in '94 when I drank a bunch of Yukon. And like that's let me ask you this. At the end of it, now like you took a sip a minute, right? Do you get a little soapy taste? I don't know. Everything's bubbling up. I am burping like a mofo. Don't sniff it and then drink it. It'll definitely make you puke. Oh no. Nope. Absolutely not. Not nope. You're ready to move on to the next one. I am. I well, I nope. We'll go ahead and start the that's that is absolutely amazing tasting. Well, well, let's hey, I tell I tell you what, weekend week, let's go ahead and rain it. I well because you already kicked it off to the side. I'm done. Yeah. So the watermelon for me, watermelon strawberry. I think it's strawberry, is what it is. I don't know what it is. They shouldn't have gone with the strawberry. They should have just did a strawberry by themselves. No, no, they should have done a watermelon by itself. Is my thought. Because usually it's that strawberry, they're trying to give it that sour taste. You know what I mean? Yeah. We're trying to get it, and it's the strawberry. What do you think? I give it a four. Dude, I give this. It even burps up. I give this to anybody that will fucking take it. Oh, really? Yeah, I give it away. You know what's your score. Yeah, I know. That's what I'm saying. I give I give it a four. I give it a one. It is very hard to get down. And then the more it sits in my mouth, I it's worse. Yeah. It doesn't get any better. Like I I yeah. I give it a one. Okay. A one and a four. The more I do it, I and I'm sorry. I like I that's all I've been drinking for the last two years of Mic Ultra. Yeah. You know what I mean? Like, yeah. It's not that I'm not a McUltra fan, but I nope. If I ever seen that come in my hand, I would pitch it. I would not okay. Well, we're gonna jump into the I hope this is better. The spicy pineapple. Yeah, me too. Because man, that I they weren't doing so bad. It doesn't have a smell, it doesn't have much of a smell. No. Well, already it ain't that bad. It's better than that. Better than that strawberry. It's better than that. All right, let's go on to Ricky's. Let's go, let's go. Okay.

Ricky’s Bad Choices Questions

SPEAKER_01 30:13

Have you ever had unprotected sex with a stranger? No. No? Nope. Why? She became your girlfriend later. Well, possibly. She wasn't really a stranger, right? No, she wasn't a stranger. Yeah. There was I would say yes. Yes, of course. I haven't we all. Yeah. We all have. I sit on my hand and it's a stranger. And you still protect it? Yeah. Because you're not sure where your hand's been. I don't. I use a little bit of what do you call that? What's that? Hand sanitizer. I like banana peels. Now that I drank that one wrong, it's like have you ever made out with a co-worker? With a co-worker? Have you ever made out with a co-worker? Uh no. No, I don't think. I have. Damn. God damn. Yeah. You're a whore. I am a whore. You're a whore. Yeah. He she. I don't know. No. He only knew like she had just a little mustache. Just a little mustache. Yeah. What was the question again? Oh, a co-worker. Yeah. Yeah. That was a long time ago though. Hard at all. And I would hate to say that I did it more than once. Well, yeah, but you've been married for 23 years. 21 years? Yeah. So it's it was a long time. And I guess, well, in 21 years, I might have kissed one or two. Yeah. Well, I was in the military, you know. So they were co-workers. I don't understand. No. I don't want to understand. Have you ever bailed out a have you ever bailed someone out of jail? No, fuck no. Well, I personally didn't, but no, but I mean I've been bailed out of jail. Yeah. But I am I I've never had enough. You were my one that I bailed out of jail. I've never had enough money to bail people out of jail. So I mean, not until my later days, you know, back in the day when people are going to jail. I'm like, yeah, you're fucked, dude. Don't call me. So we had. I was living with a buddy and his girlfriend at the time, right? She ended up going to jail, right? So we had to go bail her out, right? So we're driving to go bail her out, right? And as we go to bail her out, uh we're getting her bailing her out and everything. And then you walk up to her car and she's got her panties hanging in the off the what do you call the rear mirror? Yeah, and everything. And I come to find out she was a stripper. I'm like, dude, that's your girlfriend, a stripper, and we're bailing her out. I was like, shit. I was like, damn. Yeah. Did you get that money back? I'm guessing you never got that money back. Yeah, he it was his money. I just went back. Oh, yeah. Oh, you just you got to get a big thing. I was just the buddy. You were the man. I was the wingman. So did you at least he got it back? Did you get a dance at least? No, no. We're like, bitch, I was I know he got it back because we were sitting there. Here's a funny story. You ready for this one? We're sitting there and it's Thanksgiving time frame, right? We have some family members down, and my sister-in-law's there. She was a young girl, right? And we're sitting there and I'm showing her some stuff on the PC, and you know, because games and stuff, right? And he had that girl in this room, right? And everything. And all of a sudden, all you hear is and then she goes, What's that noise? I couldn't help it. It was like, oh, oh, oh. Like, well, it's nothing. Nothing. Go in the other room. Go in the other room. He's trying to break her out of jail. For the next time she goes there. She was paying them back. Who do you think is the uh sluttiest in this group? Definitely you. You you think? I mean, definitely you. You've been around the world. You've banged all kinds of like you went through the whole races.

SPEAKER_00 34:37

I did, Ariel.

SPEAKER_01 34:38

You, you, you, you, yeah, yeah. I wouldn't, I wouldn't say me. I'd say uh princess. I mean Princess, it's you. That's you. No, beer wench. You think a beer wench? She's the whore. She's the whore. She's the whore. I don't know. In the younger age, it probably was you. I could have been the whore back in the day. Yeah. I think the whore is now, though. Like I lived right across my state park. I mean, I like it would come now. We're all like, eh, we're too tired. But yeah, no, no, no. No, I'm like, yeah, no, I'm going to bed. Yeah. Just waiting for you to be. Would you have sex with someone of the same sex? No. No. I said that fast. No. You see our TikToks? We are not with the same sex. Well, no. Have you seen our TikToks? Like, don't get confused. Yeah. Yeah, don't get confused. We just do it for fun. Rick, you take this just for fun. The one prior to that, I'm slapping your ass. Yeah, don't take that seriously. You gotta pay for that shit. You gotta pay for them, yeah.

Accident Stories And Close Calls

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Them videos. Have you ever caused a uh road accident and drove off? Have you caught you know caused an accident? I've never been in an accident. Oh, really? I've never caused an accident. I've only been in one accident in my life. I've been in a car accident, but I never drove off. And most of them is because of weather conditions like ice, yeah, weather, or something like that. I had some bitch pull out in front of me off of Route 11 going down 307. 307, Route 11. You know that. That's that's sweet. You come, yeah, you get off right there. Yep, I get off. Well, she was getting off, and I was coming from Jefferson, and oh, she pulled right in front of you in my mom's minivan. Oh, really? And I s and I was young, I want to say 18, 19 years old. Yeah. And I spiked my brakes because she scared the fuck out of me. And I went sideways. My tire, if you next time you tomorrow when you go to work, yeah, look down that hill. So my tire on the minivan wrapped around the stop sign. Oh. And fucking stopped. And I was getting ready to flip over, and I it stopped me from going over. Oh, really? The stop sign? The stop sign did, yeah. Cause it just fucking wrapped. And it's still bent. I no, but look how deep that. Oh, I know that too. I would have been fucking, I would have told you. Yeah, you wouldn't be on this show right now. Yeah, I there could have been because this was back in the 90s. The airbags were just coming out, right? I don't think I probably had my seatbelt on. Yeah. Yeah, because back then. Yeah, back then you don't, you know what I mean? That was early days. Would you have been at fault? No, I was not. Well then you didn't. I wasn't at fault. No, she pulled out in front of me. I just I spiked my brake, and it my ass end came around, and I was a young guy. You're almost getting to the point where you roll over, end over side. I would have went side over side side side over side. But the stop sign kept you, huh? Yeah, it caught me. Yeah, you literally wrapped around the tire and caught me and like kept me. So did you have to pay for it or nope? She did. She did. Oh, really? Because these days you have to have cameras everywhere. No, back back then, like because my ass end, she it was so close. My ass when I hit my brakes, yeah. My ass end hit her ass end of her truck when she pulled out. You know what I mean? Like she was going. Like, I was like, holy fuck, I hit my brake, and my ass end slid to the left as she was pulling out. And so I got her. I caught her. I'm like, how the fuck? She pulled out in front of me. Like, how can you say I didn't? Did you didn't get hurt in that, did you? No, no. I got I got almost a miracle accident. I'm coming from North Carolina to uh Virginia, and there's a huge long bridge, right? And it's snowing, it's icy, right? And I'm cruising around, and we're going across this bridge, and we're everybody's moving pretty good. Then people start hitting their brakes on the bridge. I'm like, don't hit your brakes. So I'm like, please, please, please, please, go, go, go. And they're all sudden, so then I was like, shit. So I'm like trying to lightly tap just to keep control and just slow me down a little bit. That didn't work because they ended up hitting someone because there was already a bunch of cars. I had to hit my brakes. I went off. I went down into the what do you call it? Like the grassy area. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 39:39

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 39:40

And there's a family. And the guy's trying to throw his kid. Why would you get out of your vehicle? Kids everywhere running, and the wife's trying to, and I just looked at him and I said, Fuck. And I turned right into the woods. And I just braced for the worst. Because it was either I was gonna clip that guy and take out them kids or hurt myself, right? I went into the woods at least a hundred feet, nothing. Well, skimmed every tree. The guy I had to crawl out the back little window you have, and then the guy came and thanked me, you know. I was like, dude, why do you got your family all running around? Yeah, get your family. Get your family. Yeah, don't come thank me. Yeah, use your fucking kids back in the day. Because there's cars everywhere. And then as we're walking out of there, a semi-truck is sidewards where the trailer's going forwards, but the truck is literally sideways. Yeah, and it's like you know, I would I would never want to see that. Like we were coming down 95 out of Florida, yeah. And dude, there was just a camper fucking blown apart on the other side. Yeah, you know what I mean? Like we were going into Florida, then they were coming out, and like a camper, like I and that I I have that vision vision just stuck in my head. This one's stuck in my head. I mean, like I I mean, granted, camper and a kid, whatever, yeah they're both this is expensive. No, but the truck, you know what I mean? Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, yeah, but I like I don't understand people. People are the worst. Yeah, you're supposed to stay in your the reason why is because A, they were running all around. Yeah. And if if he would have stayed in it, I could have just slid right past his vehicle, right? Versus, oh, he's got his wife and one kid, and the other kids in front of his car, and he's trying to run again. I'm like, I had to turn left into the woods. But here's the thing about it, they pulled me out of there, and the guy's like, I do not know how you made it. And I ended up happening to turn or turn and drive home. Winchell was all tore up the car, but it still drove, right? And I was like, surprised. I got pulled over three times, and I had to show the ticket every time from the cop saying, I yeah, I'm just trying to get home, you know. Because but at the end of the day, I didn't make it. I was trying to come up here to visit, and I ended up nope, and my truck was yeah, it got fixed and everything. But yeah, but end of the day, you know, I was lucky that I made it through. Airbag never came out or nothing. But then you hit didn't I didn't hit anything, it just slowed down. They had to pull me out the same way I came in because he's like, the woods are so thick. He's like, I don't know how you missed every tree. That's good. Yeah, I was like, Yeah, yeah. I was praying, Jesus take the wheel, and then they created a song later with that. So I should get I should get money for that now. Some money for that one, but anyways, what do you think of this, bro?

Spicy Pineapple Verdict And Wrap Up

SPEAKER_01 42:46

It's a little bit, I it's not really spicy. There is no spice. No, do you get a lot of pineapple flavor or what? I get a little bit, I get a little bit on the front end. They're all seltzers, dude. But this one, I mean, I'll be honest, it doesn't have the greatest flavor. I it's okay. I would take it. No, I'd probably take the grapefruit over all of it. I would take the grapefruit. That's what I was gonna say. Like that's yeah, the grapefruit. This one would be number three. Uh, this would be number two. It's I was gonna say that, but I'm real close with the yeah. I don't I didn't care for the flavor on the cucumber. Yeah. On the back end. This has a little back end. This has a little back end flavor. I would I would get with you. Yeah, it doesn't have as good a front end, right? Yeah. Do taste a little bit of pineapple, but yeah. It ain't spicy. It's definitely nice. I like where is the spice? No. You think it would have a little heat. You would think they would just kill it with the heat. Yeah. Because it's yeah, play off of that yeah, play off the spice. I hate to say it. Out of the only one, out of the only two, I would only Princess approved the first two. Which was the grapefruit and the cucumber. The other two I went princess approved. I don't understand why you wouldn't do the pineapple. It's so cool. Yeah, the other ones just throw up. I get that. Yeah. But the pineapple's I think it's princess approved. That's me. It tastes like the grapefruit. It would be easy to get down. Yeah. Oh, absolutely not. I would not, Jason, reading. We are not Jasoning this. And Jason, do not even go and waste the money. Yeah. Like. Now, if you're a seltzer drinker, you might really like these. Because your palate might be. Yeah, if that's what you do, but me personally, no. No. Absolutely. I would give, I'm going to rate this one the spicy pineapple. I'm going to give it so I get I'm going to say seven. Because I gave grapefruit eight, right? And I gave water. I mean, I gave the cucumber seven and a half. This a seven, that a four. Right. Yeah. So I'm going to go a five. On this one? Yeah. I could see it. Like it's just not. There's no flavor. Like, I do taste a little bit of pineapple. I could drink this one a little bit better. So I guess, yeah, I can drink it. You know what I mean? Like, I could drink this one better than the cucumber.

SPEAKER_00 45:26

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 45:27

Oh, yeah. Yeah, I really could. Yeah. Like I would rather have this than the cucumber. But the cucumber is a little bit refreshing. I love the cucumber taste. But the aftertaste. The aftertaste is killer. Yeah. This one kind of has a soapy flavor too at the end. Well, my taste buds have kind of died. Yeah, now. Yeah. So. Yeah. Anyway, this is how we make this beer. That's why we podcast. And you what's your another reason to drink this week, bro? Let's hope it's not worse than this week. Oh, I hope next week's better. Better. Yeah. I hope next week's better. Yeah. My next week already looks better because this week I've had some long meetings that have consumed the day. Yeah, and that always sucks. But I mean, the weather's gonna be dropping. Oh, it is supposed to be a little bit cold. It's like 78. Oh, I think it's like I think it's all in the 70s, maybe low 80s next week. That ain't so yeah, and hopefully get a little rain on when we're sleeping. Yeah, yeah. So it is what it is. Yeah, my another reason is drink is our video got unreleased from being banned on TikTok, so that's good. Well, that's good. That is good. Not the camping trip I took you on. I yeah, yeah. Well, yeah, that was good. Yeah, I mean, it was good. I had a good time. No, I do. I yeah, we had a great time. And we'll probably maybe I'll see if I can find pictures and post them on our our Facebook page. Yeah, I got a couple of things. We got to get some actually beautiful pictures. They there was a lot of good pictures taken, but I found out I wasn't on the White Rock uh uh text. Yeah, but you weren't none of them came from there. Oh no, yeah. I I I never posted any. Oh, well, you had to post some and send us, yeah. And we

Next Week Hopes And Sign Off

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could throw them out there. But, anyways, check out our Facebook page, check out our TikToks, support us, show us some love, and we appreciate everybody listening and giving us hearts and love and everything. Anyways, any last thoughts, Ricky? Yeah, sorry about this week. Yeah, because it was rough, it was a rough and yeah, so and yeah, it's an awesome show. Oh yeah, hell yeah. All right, it's always good. Thumbs up, anyways. Any last thoughts? Don't drink and drive. And God bless you. I will see you next week.