Our Kids Play Hockey

Inspiring the Next Generation of Women in Hockey with Amber Ross

May 04, 2024 Season 1 Episode 239
Inspiring the Next Generation of Women in Hockey with Amber Ross
Our Kids Play Hockey
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Our Kids Play Hockey
Inspiring the Next Generation of Women in Hockey with Amber Ross
May 04, 2024 Season 1 Episode 239

In this episode of "Our Kids Play Hockey," Lee Elias, Christie Casciano Burns, and Mike Bonelli host Amber Ross, a trailblazer for women's hockey in Minnesota. A former collegiate player and current youth hockey coach, Amber shares her journey from a late start in the sport at age 15 to coaching youth teams. She discusses the importance of female role models in coaching, highlighting her motivations to empower young girls through sport, including her own daughters.

Amber dives into the challenges she faces in a male-dominated coaching environment, illustrating the subtle exclusions that make it tough for women coaches to feel included. Despite these obstacles, she focuses on the positive impact she has had on her players, emphasizing the growth of confidence and camaraderie among the girls.

The episode also touches on broader topics, including the evolution of women's hockey, the increasing opportunities for women in the sport, and the importance of visibility and representation in nurturing future generations. Amber's insights are a testament to the changing landscape of hockey and the pivotal role that inclusive leadership plays in developing the sport for all participants.

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NHL Sense Arena, is a virtual reality training game designed specifically to improve hockey sense and IQ for both players and goalies. Experience the next generation of off-ice training in VR with over 100+ drills and training plans curated from top coaches and players.

Use Code "HNS-72A36D" at the Meta Quest Store to score 10% off an annual plan!


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Show Notes Transcript Chapter Markers

In this episode of "Our Kids Play Hockey," Lee Elias, Christie Casciano Burns, and Mike Bonelli host Amber Ross, a trailblazer for women's hockey in Minnesota. A former collegiate player and current youth hockey coach, Amber shares her journey from a late start in the sport at age 15 to coaching youth teams. She discusses the importance of female role models in coaching, highlighting her motivations to empower young girls through sport, including her own daughters.

Amber dives into the challenges she faces in a male-dominated coaching environment, illustrating the subtle exclusions that make it tough for women coaches to feel included. Despite these obstacles, she focuses on the positive impact she has had on her players, emphasizing the growth of confidence and camaraderie among the girls.

The episode also touches on broader topics, including the evolution of women's hockey, the increasing opportunities for women in the sport, and the importance of visibility and representation in nurturing future generations. Amber's insights are a testament to the changing landscape of hockey and the pivotal role that inclusive leadership plays in developing the sport for all participants.

We Want To Hear From You - Click Here To Leave Us Fan Mail!

Our Kids Play Hockey is powered by NHL Sense Arena!

NHL Sense Arena, is a virtual reality training game designed specifically to improve hockey sense and IQ for both players and goalies. Experience the next generation of off-ice training in VR with over 100+ drills and training plans curated from top coaches and players.

Use Code "HNS-72A36D" at the Meta Quest Store to score 10% off an annual plan!


Follow Us On Social Media:


Speaker 1:

hello hockey friends and families around the world and welcome to another edition of our kids play hockey, powered by nhl sensorina. I'm lee elias, with christy casciano burns and mike benelli, and our guest today is a pioneer for women's hockey in the state of minnesota. She's a former collegiate player and current youth hockey coach and the author of I'm showing it on the screen I'm Going to Be a Hockey Star, which is available now, really wherever you get your books. Let's be honest Again for those of you listening, make sure you check that out Again. It's called I'm Going to Be a Hockey Star. We'll talk about that on the show today. Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome Amber Ross to the show. Amber, welcome to Our Kids Play Hockey.

Speaker 2:

Hi, thank you for having me.

Speaker 1:

No thanks for being here. This has been an interview a long time coming, if you will. We've been talking since before the holidays of last year, so I'm glad to have you here today. You know the first question, the obvious question, but it's one we always like to ask for our audience what drew you into coaching? How did you get into the game? Where does the origin story for Amber?

Speaker 2:

start. You know, I started playing hockey late by today's standards, because I was like 15. But in Minnesota standards, that was when, like, we had like the first state tournament for girls hockey State tournaments are huge here for hockey in particular and so, anyway, I was. I had the opportunity then to play in high school and then I played at a division three college and I had lots and lots of fun. I even played after college until I had an injury that required surgery a shoulder injury and so I hung up my skates for a little bit surgery, a shoulder injury and so I hung up my skates for a little bit.

Speaker 2:

And then I, you know, had some kids and I just really missed it. And my friends still play and I occasionally will sub for their team, but it's kind of hard with three kids, and so the reason I really wanted to play was one. I just I missed it and I or coach I should say I missed it and I wanted to get back into it. I also have two daughters, and even with I have two daughters and a son and I just really think it's important for them to be able to see females like in that position, Like I never had that growing up and I just that's one of the big reasons that I continue to do it, Cause it's very busy with three kids in hockey. My husband also coaches, so yeah.

Speaker 3:

That is a busy family. I'm going to ask you 15 really is, by today's standards, late to start in hockey. Did you have a skating background, and why weren't you intimidated? Because everyone around you were probably literally skating circles around you at that point.

Speaker 2:

Well, not for girls hockey, because this is when girls hockey started in Minnesota. There were certainly those girls and I played with them like that had been playing with the boys growing up and were amazing and still actually play today, but I like totally.

Speaker 3:

Why did you jump into hockey at that?

Speaker 2:

age, yeah, yeah, oh, and I certainly, being from Minnesota, I definitely knew how to skate. I actually did speed skating for years so. I. That part wasn't necessarily intimidating to me, Of course I. I improved my skating once I started, but know it that it just it was exciting. I had a twin sister we wanted to play and our parents were like sure you know so, so wait is she saying that fun, commitment, family, like all these things played into your decision to play hockey?

Speaker 1:

that's amazing. This is weird, right? You didn't have to play AAA for 10 years? No, I always like to bring that up because we discuss it a lot on the show and, again, I do appreciate your willingness to kind of somewhat qualify that. But the truth is this is that athletes are athletes and when you want to play, there's never a wrong time to jump in. And it's amazing what can happen when you're not 10 years old and focused on division one hockey and, by the way, parents, I'm talking to you because, no, 10 year old is focused on division one hockey.

Speaker 3:

It's very refreshing to hear this.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, right, no it's a great perspective. You mentioned it a minute ago about, you know, being a positive force for females in the game. Let's go to this one. What challenges have you faced as a female coach in a predominantly male environment, and what? What difficulties do you face as a female coach in general?

Speaker 2:

Yeah, so you know, in Minnesota, here our teams like I'm on some like Facebook pages and social media like I, it seems like states, other states do things very differently. Like Minnesota it's just kind of taken for granted, right. We have our community team that you play for and they're, you know, nonprofits and they're run by volunteers, right? So it's mostly coaches. Once we've actually started in our association, some of the upper levels, like older kids and then, like at the A and B levels, have paid coaches, like older kids and then, like at the A and B levels, have paid coaches. But you know, up until most of most of my kids, you know up until right now, have been coached by parents that are volunteering their time. So you know it's there's always politics and whatnot and you know every season they look to see oh, who's who's interested in coaching. You might fill out like a simple form. They sometimes have interviews. There's just lots of different things. But I mean the biggest thing that I've faced and it's going to sound it's a boys club and they're all not all. Most of them are very nice and nobody's like necessarily intentionally excluding me, but it is very hard Every season that I do not say that I want to be a head coach. It's kind of it's it's been very difficult to even be included as an assistant coach and we usually have like about one, maybe one or two head co-head coaches and then like maybe two assistants, sometimes more, depending on how many. You know parents are interested, but it's it. I mean I've I've had good experiences with that in bed. I've spoken up twice. One went. I don't really know if I need to discuss it. It did not go well and my feedback was not perceived well.

Speaker 2:

And I'm, by the way, coaching my daughters. Like when my son started playing hockey, well, obviously my husband coaches and he was coaching him, but the year he started I actually needed a second shoulder surgery. So I was like, oh, there was no way I was going to be helping anyway. So I just never got involved in the boy side, but I just really wanted to be there on the girl side for them and it's, it's just. It's just really hard because they're all it's from. You know things like they just golf together on the weekends or in the summer, not to say that I couldn't golf with them I don't actually golf, but you know it's it's just. Nobody necessarily is actively thinking to include the female, and that's what's hard about it.

Speaker 3:

Well, now that you've done it, tell us some of the rewards that you've experienced and inspire other women to follow your lead.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, I just I one of my favorite things about like coaching and obviously I said girls in particular I just love seeing their confidence be able to grow, like they. You know, of course we love winning and whatnot, but I just I love to watch them build the confidence and then just the the like, the interactions with their teammates right, because that was one of my favorite things from when I played, you know, just building the relationships with your team, and it's just been really fun and rewarding to watch them do that and my older daughter this year their team had quite a lot of success and that was awesome. But also the team got along really well and they bonded and I mean I was like I was feeling like I was back in high school to some extent, because it was just like, oh, these girls are so much fun. I love that they're, you know, connecting in this way and, yeah, it's a lot of fun.

Speaker 4:

Yeah, I think it's. I think it's interesting too, depending on you know what generation you're coming out of, about where women's hockey is now. Like when you ask a 23 year old, it's very prevalent, like I think it's it's actually they. I think they would be actually very surprised that there aren't women's teams. Like when I was growing up, I mean, I I vaguely remember like my sister played hockey but it wasn't like. It was like, oh well, she plays hockey only because she has to get dragged to the rink and and there's a couple of girls that like to play and but they never, never, ever did, ever did.

Speaker 4:

I hear like, oh, you know, I know, like for me, when I was 12, 15, you know, 12, 15 years old, college hockey was very talk. You know really talked about pro hockey. It wasn't talked about. But you know college hockey and the next steps in high school and things like that. And it's just funny hearing, especially all the women professionals that we've we've interviewed and talk with players and coaches that you know, depending on where, what era you grew up in, you know how you felt about where women's hockey is now. And I think you mentioned it earlier, amber, about you know you'd like to be on the bench because you want your daughters to see somebody that's a woman coaching women. Like that that that you know I would. I would echo the same thing that we'd like to see. It would be great that in girls games all the officials were girls and you know, all the staff was girls and that's good. Um, but we're far away from that right, just because of numbers. But I think, as you like, watch the maturation. You know from where you are as a 15-year-old just picking it up for fun.

Speaker 4:

Maybe talk about a little bit now in Minnesota and the areas you're in, is there a lot more intense pressure? Is the fun being taken out of it? Because now there is an endgame for girls. Before there wasn't, a long time ago it was just. I don't know. I play girls hockey and I'm done. When I'm 17 years old I'll never play hockey again. But now there's starting to be a little bit of an end game. Right, they're starting to be a little bit of oh well, there's more scholarships available. There's more women's hockey teams available. There's now. There's now women could actually get paid to play professionally after after school. So does that change? Do you think, especially in the state of hockey um, does that change? Do you think, especially in the state of hockey um, does that change you? You know how you feel when you're in these rinks about the pressure for these young girls.

Speaker 2:

Um, I, I mean my oldest, my oldest daughter is 10. That was on the 10 U team this year. So the only the only benefit that I'm seeing to like having the PWHL is that now, like my, my, that daughter in particular loves hockey. She wants to play for the Gophers and she's going to play for the PWHL. This is what she's told me. I just love that she can see that.

Speaker 2:

I guess I don't necessarily see that pressure with coaching these younger girls right now. I don't necessarily see that pressure with coaching these younger girls right now. It's just they're just all still having, you know, a lot of fun playing the game. And I mean, when you were talking that that daughter's team this season was in a tournament, it was a championship game. We were. It was a tournament, our, our city was hosting, so we were on our home soil right and our city was hosting. So we were on our home soil right and our home ice rather. And it was the most exciting game because the crowd was I've never seen such a huge crowd for a 10U game and they ended up going into double overtime.

Speaker 2:

And so there's a boys team that's supposed to be on the ice but they're in their you know, equipment watching on the glass. It's, you know, first four on four and then it's three on three, right. Like I'm saying this because I just have this vision in my head. Like you know, one of our, one of our top scoring players, gets the puck, she goes in, dekes the goalie.

Speaker 2:

We have a mom who's a photographer on the team and she has this photo of this girl who just scored this goal. Her hands are in the air. We had two female refs. The one ref had her hand, you know, like, noting the goal, and then there's these boys lining the background screaming their heads off, like it was. It was absolutely amazing. Like like that photo, when I thought I actually started crying, like it was just like this is, like, this is what it is and this is, in Minnesota at least, what I've been experiencing is not necessarily the, the pressure, just like the enjoyment and the growth of the game and that this boys A team is, you know sitting there cheering for these girls.

Speaker 2:

I mean they were yelling like MVP, when they came off the ice. It was so much fun, you know you're bringing up an interesting point.

Speaker 4:

Go ahead, Mike Just on that, though, and those boys like they, they think that's normal.

Speaker 1:

Right.

Speaker 4:

There's no like lame, or it's just like they're. They're just as enthusiastic about that because now they're all athletes, all of them right, and I think then they're all but but. So I didn't mean to cut you awfully, but I think it's you're good, and we want to see that photo because I think that'd be great I would love.

Speaker 1:

I wrote a note here to see the photo. You know I'll credit.

Speaker 2:

I'll send it to you guys and credit them yeah because she did a great job with that capturing that a magical moment.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, you'll have that forever.

Speaker 1:

Yeah you know it's funny. As we're recording this, a friend of mine just sent me this update, just happened. It says usa hockey will have over a hundred thousand females registered to play hockey for the first time ever. Um, I just saw that. And the reason why this these conversations, are important too um, because I want to give some perspective on this from the male perspective is that sometimes we forget as males you know, you don't know what you don't know right, you can't see what you can't see.

Speaker 1:

My daughter's also playing hockey, right, and interesting situations that I'm very attuned to of when she makes a team. Last year we had an experience where there were two girls on the team and the hominess she felt of oh, I'm not the only girl on the team. Adversely, on her school team she was the only girl player on the team and you know she would say, oh, are there any other girls playing? I think it's just like you know, if you don't hear that in your head when they say that. And again, this isn't that boys are not making girls feel welcome, it's just that it's a different situation right now.

Speaker 1:

The other cool thing about that school team is that we had a female head coach, and it was very important as an assistant coach that when my daughter would ask me something that was not in my you know jurisdiction, that I was able to say you need to ask your head coach right To empower her. Not that that was the reason, but that's part of it is that she can see a female leader in charge of that team. So, unless Christy, you and Amber disagree, I think it's important from the male side of this game that we enable, when appropriate, right, and also just remember this perspective here If you have a girl on the team and she's the only girl on the team, she's the only girl on the team and it's not that she needs special treatment, it's just you got to be aware of that. Yeah, right, um, and I I see this happen a lot, right, coach, women's teams, it's yeah, you got to be aware of that perspective.

Speaker 3:

I'll throw that back on you, yeah uh, sophia, for a couple years, was the only girl on her team, um, and the boys treated her equally. I mean, she was a tough little hockey player. She didn't want to be treated any differently and there was. It was fantastic because there was equal amount of respect. She respected them, they respected her, they protected her. Sometimes when some bigger kids would try to go for the ponytail you know that happens. Try to go for the ponytail you know that happens, um.

Speaker 3:

But then the following two years, all of a sudden she started seeing more girls coming onto the team, which was great. She wasn't the only girl and it was interesting, because you think that that would automatically separate the girls are going to be a one-sided boy, but that didn't happen. They still united, which was a beautiful thing to see. So I think through the years the culture is changing, the attitude is changing. It's a more welcoming environment now for girls to play, and I just we just had down the road from us in Utica. The World's Women Championships played in Utica, new York. Sadly, the USA team didn't win, but the crowds were fantastic. I was so excited to hear about that that now people are excited to watch little girls play and women play hockey and we're in a good position. We still have a ways to go, but the growth has been positive and so inspiring.

Speaker 1:

Well, Amber, let me throw this is a great conversation. Let me throw this into one of the questions. This is what role can men and women play in supporting the diversity and inclusion of women in hockey? Because I know there's plenty of men like myself. This is what we can do, but the truth is, it's not for us, to kind of say it, it's your opinion, is what I want to hear, Right? So how can we work together? What would you like to see happen more often in the ice rink? And Christy, obviously this is open to you as well to kind of continue to push this forward.

Speaker 2:

Because it is a new dawn right now for women's professional sports across the board, like we're seeing that. Yeah, I think that specifically, like if you're, if you're concerned about that, like as a male coach, like I think it's really important to just work to be an ally for the female that is, you know, or more that is, in your area, like you know, my experience like sometimes has been people saying, oh, we want more women coaching and then they're not really doing much to like either support that or encourage it among the coaches that are there.

Speaker 2:

And I also think, like I mean it is like 99% of the guys I've coached with because I've coached with all guys thus far have been amazing and I think it's just like using your. Sometimes it might mean stepping aside to give more space for her, like it's I. It's hard for me because I don't I'm not a naturally extroverted person and even like I love to be there to coach and whatnot, but I don't, I don't think my strengths lie in the head coach rousing locker room speech. You know like and it pains me because I want to be able to do that for the girls, but I'm also like that's also not who I am. I did have an opportunity this spring. My youngest daughter was on a little tournament team for the weekend and I coached. This was the first time I've ever coached with another female and she was so amazing. It was so much fun coaching with her. She was so knowledgeable and just the communication just felt so natural, even though I just met her, you know. So it was.

Speaker 2:

it was awesome, and I would love to be able to do that again.

Speaker 3:

I think you have to be true to yourself and I bet you're a great coach, just who you are. No-transcript. They're home from break and recruited them to help coach on the weekends. I bet they'd jump at that opportunity and I think that's overlooked right now and I think a lot of the women who graduate from college aren't thinking about that because they're so you know, focused on other things getting a job. But I bet you, if these organizations reached out to these young women, they would be more than willing to to help out. Maybe they couldn't do it full time, but even just to be a presence on the ice, maybe do a couple of skills with the kids. So there's a lot of opportunity out there that can help grow the game.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, and our association did that with some of the older levels. And the other thing that I think our association does a really good job with is we partner with the high school. So, like the younger girls, you know, they assign us, like assign them to a certain game and they get to go out there. Um, first of all they get to sit on the bench while the team is warming up, and then they get to go in the locker room, you know, before the game, and then they have them come out on the ice and they skate up with the player that is being, you know, announced the starting lineup. They'll have like two girls paired with one of them. And it's just awesome. And even when my, my older daughter's team this year, they they won a couple of tournaments and they honored their team at the high school game. So like we could go and you know the girls were there and you know, oh, this team won, you know, this tournament, and that's I mean yeah, that's important.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, those high school girls like it's, it's awesome. Yeah, I love that idea.

Speaker 4:

I think it's the same way too for men. You know, men coaches and female coaches I mean, it's basically the same is trying to get them is so hard because a lot of the organizations don't provide the support that's needed for those young coaches to jump in, like, I think, because especially good or bad they're the most you know, they're removed and they're not removed so far from playing right. So they remember like, oh my God, yeah, those parents are nuts or that was a crazy experience, or that was really intense.

Speaker 4:

Or, oh my, you're asking me to give up 28 weekends of my life, you know, for a bunch of kids, I don't know. So I think there is a lot of mentoring and a lot of support and a lot of ways we can, as organizations, help young, you know, females and males, to get into coaching so that they can, they can, you know, pass on that knowledge and have that, that mentorship to our kids, because it's great, it's's the best, right. I mean my, you know, when my kids have a young guy or girl coaching them on the ice, that's, you know, maybe in like the early twenties, it's like gold. I mean they love it and it's so much better, like the experience is fun and I see the kids have fun. The guy, I call them kids, but the coaches, the people that are coaching, these young kids.

Speaker 4:

They're not jaded yet they're not. You know they don't. They're not bitter, they're not, they're not like, their time is not like. Oh my god, I have enough time I don't have time to do all this like, so I think we just have to you know all acknowledge that we have to do a better job as organizations to make sure they're supporting, uh, those groups so they can continue to make it easy for them right gold mines out mines out there.

Speaker 3:

We're not harvesting, that you know there's a lot of opportunity.

Speaker 1:

Christy, I was just going to jump on that. You know, for all the organizational leaders that listen to this show, you should keep a tab of your kids after they're done with your team in youth hockey and call them four or five years later Because, like, it's not going to be all of them, but I would think it's a safe bet that most post-collegiate hockey players, even post-high school players, will want to help. I agree, yeah, there's something about giving back. I remember when I got done playing competitively, first thing I wanted to do was get back in the game with coaching. I didn't want to stray away Not that there's any issues with parent volunteers. God bless every one of you, because we would not be able to run our organizations without you.

Speaker 1:

But there is something about having a 24, 25-year-old I was going to say kid, but young adult out there that has a passion for the game, and we all know kids love a different voice in the locker room, especially at the younger ages. Right Now I have not quite come to terms yet that kids think I'm old. I'm slowly starting to understand that, that when they look at me I'm like, why are you so scared? Like, oh, I have a beard and no hair. I'm a dad to you, so I think it's important. This is just broader, like understanding the situation you're in. And, amber, again turning that back to you, we talked about it a little bit, of the coaching perspective, but, as a woman, can you talk to me about the power for a young girl to see a woman leader on the bench on the ice, like what is the perspective for the 10 year old girl? Because I think we need to explore that a little bit to give full understanding to the audience.

Speaker 2:

But to give full understanding to the audience. Yeah, I mean, I like, I constantly feel like if you can see it, you can be it and you can believe it, right. I also like my background. I work in children's publishing and it's just very important for us in our books to get a diverse range of kids that we see right, and this is this you know then plays out in life, right, like it's not just the dads that are coaching or the men you know, just to see her, you know in a position of leadership, speaking up, you know talking in with the men, like on. You know equal terms, which I know it sounds silly, but like, but you know it's just.

Speaker 1:

I never saw that it doesn't sound silly, um, I mean, I appreciate you're saying that, but it it we again, you don't know what you don't know, right? That's not silly, that's reality, right? We don't see that sometimes.

Speaker 2:

Sorry, go, go ahead yeah, no, um, and I just um. I think it's just a great role model for the girls, right.

Speaker 2:

I mean I remember, like you were speaking about young, younger coaches, like I remember I played lots of sports but in middle school I played volleyball and we had a young coach that I still remember her, you know. I mean she was great, but we just thought she was so cool, she was young and she, you know, related to us and knew all that and so I don't know, I just it's like the benefits, like many.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, no, I'll say this too just to kind of continue the perspective that you know. The generation right before me grew up with the 1980 miracle team and, like I love that team, I studied that team, I revere that team. But what's funny is and I've talked about this once or twice on the show before you know then I I often wonder what would happen if the 98 olympics didn't happen. Um, in the sense of that was the first women's olympic games in ice hockey, the usa won. Um, the men's team, I remember, was struggling heavily that year, so all of our attention went to cammy, granato and the Team USA women's hockey team and they were heroes to me, right, and I was at a very impressionable age and again, I wonder what would have happened if I didn't see that or experience For a woman. I can only imagine what that experience would have been like, having never seen that before. But these inflection points where you said it if you see it, you can become it.

Speaker 1:

I look at my daughter and Christy you can comment on this for Sophia too it's like my daughter is now growing up and this is the first time this has ever been true in the last five years that professional hockey is a very realistic opportunity if she wants to pursue it, right? I mean, even for Sophia Christie, it's like I'm sure she knew college was there and maybe pro. But the perspective changes because of these inflection points. So when my daughter sees, you know, 18000 people going to watch women in Montreal or Minnesota, right, the perspective is suddenly changed, the ceiling is broken and it's a new reality and I think we all play a role in that, in supporting that and not not having that uh off the cuff like oh, it's a gimmick, you know, it's just only happening because people are pushing an agenda. They're pushing it. It's like no one's pushing an agenda. This is, this is awesome, right. This is good for the game period. Am I? Am I off at anything I'm saying right now?

Speaker 3:

no, you're 100% right and and I I this with you before I talked to a few women who are professional coaches now and it's bittersweet to them because they now look back and wonder would the 10-year-old?

Speaker 3:

me have been able to dream bigger than where I am now and aspire to becoming a professional hockey player, like so many women can do now. So it's bittersweet to them because they couldn't dream that big. There were limitations. They could only dream about going to college. Maybe, if they were good enough, make an Olympic hockey team and that's it, and then coach. But now there's this professional hockey league for women, and it's so much. But now there's this professional hockey league for women, and it's so much more exciting for the little girls of today.

Speaker 1:

You know what's funny, guys? I was just thinking about this All the kind of jesting that we do about your 10-year-old going D1 or professionally, statistically speaking, every girl playing has a way higher chance of that than every boy playing by miles, you know what I mean. So it's, I'm very much joking, but where are the parents saying my daughter's going professional D1? We got to get her on the AAA team. Well, they're there.

Speaker 4:

They're there. They're there now. Yeah, I believe there's no doubt they're there now and I think the intensity but I think it's like you know amber was saying it earlier just about, you know, seeing players on the ice and the way children and you, you know, the real question is interviewing those five and six and seven year olds. And I could guarantee you this, and I know this for a fact, like, if my sons were on the ice at five and six and seven with a female coach or male coach, as long as they had energy and they smiled and they had fun, I don't think they would ever mention, like right, that it was a woman coach or a male coach. I mean, it just wouldn't happen. I mean I so so I think it all depends on it's the same thing, right, it's how you, it's how what you're saying as a parent in the car, what you're saying, going into that like, oh, okay, you can take a little bit from her, but she really doesn't know what she's talking about. She only played at minnesota state, you know, whatever. So just, don't you know, don't listen to her. So I think it's just like you know, but I think it's almost like, just, it's just a matter of how you present it as a parent too, about what the power of that coach can be female, male, whatever you, whatever you know, ethnic background doesn't matter. They can coach and they can smile and your kids are happy. I think that's the number one thing.

Speaker 4:

And I think we're getting and again, hockey, in my opinion, is behind on all of this. It's no doubt behind on diversity, it's behind in inclusion, it's behind on the sexes, but from where I sit, it's getting better and better and there's more work being done to fix it. So that's a good thing and I think that's you know, but I think it's you know to everybody's point here. Talking, it's just a matter of like, it's our job as administrators and leaders and coaches to keep fostering that environment and then showing it that you can. You know we're going to show you this is what's possible and you could be this person. But we need to be the one saying I need to recruit that kid, that player, to come work with me, like aggressively, like I need to go out and do that purposefully so that it can happen, not just wait for it to happen.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, and I even go a step further with my kids. I mean, I call it out. I think, yeah, for a boy that sees a female coach on the ice, it's probably like, oh yeah, that's normal. I do think. I mean, so many of the little little ones would always tell me I was their favorite coach, and I think it was more that I was their favorite coach, you know, and I think I don't think it was more than I was a female, you know, but I, I'm constantly calling that stuff out for them so they are aware as they navigate their life.

Speaker 2:

I mean not to bring it to basketball, but I, you know, we were watching Caitlin Clark and her team and I was. I could not believe. I was like, look at this. We've got, you know, these women's like college basketball teams. We've got female coaches. Look at the refs, they're females. The commentators are all female. I've literally never seen that before. It's like kids. I don't think you understand that this is like a big deal and this, this is like what we need. Like for years it was all men and nobody seemed to comment. So let's comment on this now. I don't know, and nobody seemed to comment, so let's comment on this now, I don't know.

Speaker 1:

No, listen, I think this all comes to normalizing that, while there is women's and men's basketball, it's all basketball. There is women and men's hockey, but it's all hockey, and to me, that's the path where the goal is that. You know, I understand why they have separated it, but the idea is women's hockey is hockey to me, like I want to watch it because it's hockey, right, right and moving towards that. Listen, we only have a couple of minutes left. Amber, I wanted to bring this up. You talked about before dreams. You wrote this great book. I've read it to my children. I'm going to be a hockey star again. It's available everywhere For those of you who want to get it, walk. Why did you?

Speaker 2:

create this. What's the message? And again, I loved reading this with both of my kids. It was a really wonderful book. Yeah, so it's. The book is basically about a little boy who's stepping out onto the ice for the first time and dreaming of being a hockey star. It actually is. The purpose of the book was twofold One really just trying to get kids who really are stepping under the ice for the first time to understand what what like might be entailed in a practice. It's like a little intimidating, right, Especially if you haven't skated before. So there's, you know some things in the beginning about you know you're going to fall, it's okay, you just get back up. But really the thread of the story is him dreaming of what he's going to do when he's a hockey star, and it's just. I mean, in that context, I feel like anyone can appreciate the book, whether you're a hockey player or not. It's just dreaming your biggest dream, and that's all I would ever hope for my kids, or any kids just to dream big.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, I think you accomplished it. You know, I always say to hockey parents because, look, you have parents that think kids are going all the way. You have parents kind of that don't care, which is also fine. And then you have parents that kind of openly say, oh, you're never going to make it. And I always cringe when I hear that because your kid has a right to dream. They have a right to dream Again. You don't have to agree with their dream, but you have to support the right to dream and I think when you stunt that you're holding them back. You can be realistic with them about the effort it takes, the work it takes, that nothing's guaranteed, but don't take away their will to dream. That's why I love the title. I'm going to be a hockey star. Right, that's beautiful. We're just about up on time, christy, mike. Any other questions before we jump out of here?

Speaker 3:

Oh, amber, you're such a joy to talk to and I think you're very inspirational too. So if women are kind on the fence about jumping in and coaching, take Amber's lead and do it. Thank you.

Speaker 4:

Yeah, yeah, no, and listen more hockey. Books in the libraries are better for everyone, so more. I love it and I think you know we need more stories surrounding hockey players and and accomplishing their dreams, and I think it's, you know, it's like like like Christie and Lee's books, it's, it's always. It's always fun to open up, you know, open up these, you know, hockey centric subjects and be able to talk to them. They're more fun for a parent that's a hockey fan. I agree.

Speaker 1:

Christy and I are working on a book called Monday.

Speaker 3:

Morning, mike, stay tuned.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, yeah, the Monday Morning. Mike book how to Become Happy on a Monday as a Coach.

Speaker 4:

And then other books too, right, I hope that's more of a motivational book.

Speaker 1:

It's an audio book only actually, mike.

Speaker 3:

That'll be a sitcom too. Yeah, it's an audio book only actually That'll be a sitcom too.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, it's going to be like Seinfeld. I showed up and the game was on. That's going to do it for this episode of Our Kids Play Hockey, powered by NHL Sensorina. Amber, thank you so much for joining us today. Thank you Again. You can see all of our episodes or listen to them at ourkidsplayhockeycom. But for Amber Ross, christy Cash, jonah Burns and Mike Benelli, I'm Lee Elias and we're going to see you on the next edition of our kids play hockey. Have a great week, everybody.

Empowering Women in Youth Hockey
Female Inclusion and Enjoyment in Hockey
Supporting Diversity in Women's Hockey
Empowering Girls in Hockey Culture

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