I was away. I know you were in P. S. P.! Dude what P. S. P.? Palm Springs. Puh. It's the airport code. Oh. I was like, what's the extra P for?

Palm Springs party. Absolutely. Party, and then bed by eight. Oh, 100%. It's another planet down there. Oh yeah. It's my favorite. Is it? Huh. It was 40 degrees so 40 degrees, huh? Yeah, I've been there when it was 47 degrees. No, and I hated it. I can't do that.

I can't do 30 20 no breeze. This is why I'm loving this. Yeah, this is good weather. Yeah yesterday was  

so I made the mistake of flying to LAX and then driving. Oof. I know, rookie move, but I'm gonna write up a little travel guide and I'll put that on the blog.  

We have lots to cover today. I know. Big day. Big day. Okay. I did have a nightmare last night. I have a lot of nightmares about this podcast. Oh, about the podcast? Yeah. You do? Only that I say stupid shit and then people are mad at me. No matter what you say, someone's gonna get mad at you.

I know. I feel like that's a really good rule to just live by. I'm working on releasing that. We're not saying anything crazy. It's not for me to worry about how other people receive stuff. That to me seems like shirking accountability and an excuse to be an asshole.

Oh no, if I scream at someone, that's on me. I can't be like, I screamed at you, how you take it is up to you. Yeah, that, I don't have time for that. No. It's such bullshit. But the over worrying, over thinking that I'm saying something that someone might be offended by. Mhm. It's hard to put yourself out there.

And it's not even like we're out there promoting anything or saying anything crazy, just two bitches chatting. And it's still, people get up in arms about the craziest things. We have said some very interesting things in our last ten episodes. People get upset over the craziest things, like the bush.

Yeah. People got upset about the bush. it's the reason that there's over a million views on that  moon mode! Moon mode. I have a friend who exists, her phone is always on moon mode. 

  📍 Oh yeah, that's you.   📍  📍 Welcome to Your Weekly Breakdown, the silly and occasionally smart podcast. I'm Emily, a tech burnout, mother of two, and it really feels like fall today.

Holy shit. Oh, I love it. I don't know if I do. It's so dark. Oh, I don't love that. I'm Caitlin. I'm a comedian, an actor, a writer, and a real fall lover. Every week we get together to chat about cultural conversations and the news. We make fun of the latest pop culture dramas, rant about life's minor inconveniences, judge each other's style and life choices, and maybe we'll even have a guest or two.

 📍 This podcast is brought to you by Hard Copy, the free comfort newsletter for cozy weekends. Join the thousands of busy women who already subscribe, to enjoy  📍 curated recommendations for what to watch, listen to, read, and indulge in. And to stay in the know on all things culture, work, and women.

It's really good. It's really great.  I like it because it's also, it's a way of getting book recommendations, which I love. It's not bossy. No, fuck no. 

What I like about the hard copy is that it's, here's a bunch of stuff. It's been curated, so it's not,  like a vomit  of the internet. But if you like this, that works for you, too. Yeah. What about this thing? You might like this. think I've ever asked you  you.

Oh, I didn't know you were  Oh, I love it.  I'm always open to feedback. You hardcopy. online. I love your nails. Thank you. I painted them.  I love them. I'm a big girl.

I'm a big girl.  And I love the color too. It's very red. I would like it to be a little more brown. I don't do my 

Marker

nails from basically March to October. Winter, I like a done nail. I don't know why, it's a weird, it makes no sense.

I like that though, because in the summertime you're tanned,  you're outside, you're in the water, it chips, it's useless. There's people who do their nails religiously, and I love that. It is a little more feminine, and I think in the dark of winter, and I think in the dark of winter.

do I want to be full sloth or maybe slightly ladylike? Yeah. I'm gonna do winter nails.  I love that. Do you not normally do your nails? No. Never.  I used to love getting jowl nails now I don't see people  this is the fun part about fucking around and finding out.

I didn't for me because I don't see people, right? And so this is purely for my pleasure. I love it. What a fun thing about getting older and like spending so much time trying to people in   their own pursuit of leisure and  get to figure out things that I like.

And I used to. Do nails because I thought I was supposed to  and then I went years without doing them. And now  them. Now you like having nails. Yeah, because I got little fat sausage fingers.  I figured, oh my god, you do too. Why are your hands so hot? We're touching hands right now.

No, I run hot.  I run hot. I can see you. Oh my god. I'm like boiling in here. When we first started recording the podcast in the summertime, we had to turn off the A. C. I remember thinking, I'm not lasting on this show. I know. I was like, oh, we'll have to have a funny segment where we're just like, don't have our tops on or something. 

We won't do that to anyone. We'll wait for the summertime. Do you shave your face? Yeah. Okay. I think I need to shave my face, but just with a little like the, like a lady shaver.

What? Yeah. The, I know what you mean.  I think I have to, I never have, I always wax my mustache. Yeah. 'cause  You don't get eyebrows like  along with it. Yeah. One comes with the other, it's not that I'm afraid of what the regrowth looks like, it's that I will.

touch my face constantly and then I will have a breakout. So I'm like I might as well just be hairy.  The first day that you shave, it feels great. Yeah. And then the, a few days later you're like, am I getting like a stubble?

And then what does that look like when the sun hits? It doesn't look like anything cause it's not like a, it's not dark hair. I have one big dark one that comes out of my cheek. Yep. I love being a woman. I love hormones. I love what's that for? Who's that keeping warm? where history of evolution was that necessary?

And why, when I have a scar, does a black hair come out of a scar? Oh.  Talk to me about hairy nipples. Talk to me about hairy nipples. Sometimes you gotta lift it up to look under and go, I've been forgetting about those ones. I don't do, I'm not, nope, No? No,  Do you like your boobs?

Yes. too. Even after breastfeeding,  Good. I love that. Gunt. Oh. just there. Like when I lean over. I think that's your uterus. stretched skin from carrying two massive humans in my body.

But also, I carry two humans in my body. Hell yeah you did. Were they big kids? What's a big kid? Ten pounds and over. I was born ten pounds. So yeah, that's what I'm saying.  And my little brother was  Good golly! I know.

Mine were very normal. Normal big kids.  But I'm also six feet tall, so I got room. I always feel so bad for the tiny women because they have to, they're carrying the same size fucking child that I had and I have a whole foot of height on them. My sister in laws, they both had children and their kids were the same size as mine.

I had more room. Like a full foot more room. They're both five feet tall. Way more torso to play in. So much more.   Where do we kick off? I think we should kick off with what I see in the media as like the most prominent topic right now, which was Kamala Harris on the Call Her Daddy podcast.

Have you read about this? Heard about this? I cannot believe that she was on Call Her Daddy, but then I can also believe that she was on Call Her Daddy because it's so massive. I know about alex Cooper, who's the host of Call Her Daddy.

That's right. She was in the news a few years ago because her and her co hosts had a massive. Split up. That's right. I don't listen to Call Her Daddy. I just, I know that it's a very popular podcast on a massive network. She, her, former co host Sophia got their start being like pretty risque.

They were on the Barstool network, which is very, leans Gen Z, very Kind of frat college life. And they're very risque talking about, blow jobs. Yep. And they, she is tremendously successful. So in 2021,  Alex Cooper signed , a three year $60 million deal with Spotify. And so good for her. It very good for her. Very good for her. And what I find crazy is the chatta is people being like, I can't believe she. Had Kamala Harris, people  being like, why are we all underestimating Alex Cooper? I'm like, who's underestimating a person who got a three year, 60 million podcast deal?

 I'm more surprised at the idea that, politicians are finding ways to get to people's ears that are no longer just the debates. A lot of people are asking the question you're asking, why would Kamala Harris go on call her daddy? NPR recently obtained the audience data on that show,  percent women. 76 percent under the age of 35, 93 percent under the age of 45,  48 percent Democrat, 24 percent Republican, 20 percent Independent, which is interesting because Alex Cooper has never talked politics.

No. She talks about women. She's not talking about politics. 34 percent of her listeners for that show live in the South, 24 percent in the West, they're referring of course to the U. S., 22 percent in the Northeast, 20 percent in the Midwest. That's a real spread.  Alex Cooper, the host of the show has a wide listener range across the U.

S. Yeah, skews young, wide political spectrum. The people questioning it are often in media circles, my theory is that she isn't a journalist, and she pulls these high profile people, she has a massive audience, and it gives the impression that these high profile figures, these public figures, like the current vice president and presidential nominee, Kamala Harris, don't need to go on traditional media outlets.

To get ears, right? Why would you go on a news network that skews Boomer that skews older? Yeah, when you could go on Alex Cooper's call her daddy and get that spread that we just went through the audience data. Did you listen to the interview?

No. Okay, so I didn't learn Anything new about Kamala Harris. I don't think that's a bad thing. I think it was a great interview overall, right? but it also it wasn't Real interview. there were no Really tough questions. There was no investigation I'm not saying it was a softball.

I'm just saying when we, a journalist digs a little deeper.  journalist tries to get under the veneer of the public figure. So that the audience learns more. What Alex Cooper did, and she explains in her intro, she really was Attuned to her audience and wanted to cater to her audience.

And she did. And so in that way, it was pretty great. And maybe the point of the interview was not to have a new version of Kamala Harris. It was actually to get more people aware of who she was and what she stood for. A hundred and ten percent. That's fascinating that 93 percent of the listenership of Call Her Daddy are under the age of 45 years  It's very pop culture. She'll talk about issues that pertain to women, but not necessarily go into the resolution or the policy changes that need to happen to resolve those issues, Obviously, if it's about listeners, that's great.

0 percent criticizing Alex Cooper, by the way. Big fan. Yeah, do you remember when Obama went on Oprah? Yeah. So before he was even running for president, I think he was senator in Chicago or Illinois, I should say. And he went on Oprah and Oprah was so excited about this young politician. And I remember seeing President Barack Obama on Oprah show when it was still on the air at 4 p.

m. and thinking, this is incredibly, this is a politician. And I was much younger, and it was really cool to see politics in a world that I hadn't seen it before. And that stood out to me. And I think about shows like Smartless, who get massive names. Tim Waltz is going on Smartless. There you go. I find that interesting because I also read something this week from the AARP that said, It's Women who are voting in the election.  It's mostly women over 50 who vote in the U.

S. We do have some elections here in Canada happening. So just to be clear, talking about in this case, the U. S. I'm talking about solely the U. S. So I'd be curious about what the study would be in Canada. But they're saying that 31 percent of women voters over the age of 50 are considered engaged and concerned.

 They did a survey of women over the age of 50. Yes. And they broke them down into different groups I could see how it would be similar in Canada, but there's different groups of women voters.

There's the rubber bands, is what they call them. Those who are stretched thin and holding things together. There's the disconnected and disappointed, who are worried, financially strained and socially isolated.

minute. I know. I know.  And then there's the group called the engaged and concerned, who are tuned in, relatively democratic leaning, but ideologically diverse. There's the Instagrammas, is what they're calling them, who are socially connected and enjoying life. They call them Instagrammas? Yeah. Isn't that cute?

Okay,  And then  there's a group called the traditionalists. Podcasts who are relatively conservative, Republican leaning and traditionally engaged. So they've broken down this category of women over the age of 50 and they're seeing that the group that votes the most are the engaged and concerned.

Those who are tuned in, relatively democratic leaning, but ideologically diverse. So podcasts like this makes sense. I don't know how many people over the age of 50 are listening to call her daddy, but they can. They are now. Yeah. They're curious now. And they're the ones who are, tuned in, leaning in, curious, historically Democratic, but can be swayed.

They're not loyal to a party. So I think it's interesting to see too that that it's women who are voting  and it's specifically women over 50 who are voting. They're making the difference.  Like you said, we're having an election here, a provincial election in BC on the 19th of October.

And I'm very aware of the election. I love voting. I'm a big voter. But it's funny that here on a Canadian podcast, the first thing I talked about was American politics. But it's just so massive. We are deeply influenced by U. S. media no matter what. And and our audience is mostly in the States. we have a North American audience.  And we talk about things all over the world. They have a presidential election.

That's a big deal. their policies and the way they govern does set the tone for other countries around the world. And directly affects Canadian politics as well. Yeah, no question. And not to mention, you can't read or view anything about Canadian news via your social media channels.

You know what's different though about Canada than the US? The US has the NFL and Canada has the CFL. Jesus. We have our own football league with six teams. And at one point, two of those teams were named the Rough Riders. Yeah.  That's insane when you think about it.

That's why we don't think about it. Two of the teams, two of the six were named the Rough Riders. It's fun to watch. Yeah, I mean it's football with an extra down and like shorter yards. I don't know, tinier men. But will you watch the Super Bowl?

No. No?  Taylor Swift's there. It's actually going to be Kendrick Lamar in 2025. Kendrick Lamar has been announced the halftime Super Bowl show. Okay, that'll be good. In 2025, which turns out is soon. I cannot wait to see what he does. Yeah, that's the fun part of the Super Bowl for me.

 

Have you ever been in a role where people just like kinda didn't want you there?  Oh, I'm sure. I'm sure I have, yes. This is like maybe a little bit of a quandary. I've been thinking about it for a little bit because  it's mandated by Hockey Canada that you have to have a safety person.

Really? On every team? Yes. See, that seems like such a duh to me, and you're like, what? No, I'm surprised by it. Oh. It seems like a very good step that I'm surprised people were like, we should do this. I agree, and I take it very seriously, and I'm learning that not everyone takes it as seriously as me. 

So it's reminding me of times, especially in my role as an ops person for years years and years in operations, and then even marketing. People kind of side eyed a little bit and they're like, ugh, like really? She's here? And they don't say anything because somebody else put you there or you volunteered to be there and they don't really want you there and nobody wants you there until something's wrong.

Then they're like, where the fuck is that girl?  Where's that chick with the first aid kit? I've done it to myself. in those roles in my past life as a as a tech girl, I. Was running around with her first aid kit, fixing everybody's problems making all the plans here's how we're gonna do things.

And people would be like,  And now I'm doing it again. Yeah. As a volunteer on a kids hockey team. Where do you keep your first aid kit? In a backpack that I take with me. Yeah. I'm supposed to. I also have a handskate sharpener. I also have hockey tape. I have a little screw set. I know how to fix all the helmets.

I take it very seriously. I think that's wonderful. Thank you. Nobody cares. Nobody cares until there's a kid lying on the ice. Until there's blood on the ice. Obviously there's rarely blood, but it does happen. Anyway, it just reminded me, I was like, why do I do this to myself?

I keep putting myself in places that people don't really want me. Also, like this podcast, people don't, nobody asked for this. But if you're going to wait for people to ask you to do things, it's going to suck because they're only going to ask you to do things that are going to benefit them.  You're right.

 I did all my first aid, you know what else? When one of the coaches has a fucking heart attack, you know who's gonna be doing CPR?

You. Yeah. Huh. Yeah. Cause you know how. Yeah. When was the last time you took a CPR course? Couple weeks ago. Really? Yeah, I refresh quite frequently. It's been a few years. I I needed to be second nature.  I don't even want to hesitate.

No. So I know like where all the defibrillators are and when I go into a new rank, I'm like, where are all the defibrillators?  to the facilities person where if there's an ambulance that needs to  How do we do that? We make up like a sign so that if I decide in that moment we need to get an  this fucking nerd alert.

These kids are eight! These kids are eight! All the more reason they're little. I know. And I know a few weeks ago I said I've tried to trip, trip children. I still really like kids. 

That was perfect. When I was a flight attendant, We had to do full CPR training and keep that, refreshed. But we also had to learn how to put out a fire in full heels and like a pillbox hat. And I love that stuff where I really, I found it very comforting every time I would go on an airplane.

I would look at the safety manual, reread it. Yeah, got it. I would double check everything. I would triple check things. Cause I just, it gives me peace of mind too. Yeah.  I used to make my own first aid kit and take it to school in like grade three and four.  I don't know what the hell I was planning for.

I was meant to be an ops person, like meant to fix the problems. And yeah, huge loser mode. I love making sure that my friends are drinking water. you think that's the same thing? Yeah. Where it's the idea of, it's like just taking care of someone. Yeah. It's also I think a way to show you care.

Yeah. minor sports, it's volunteer. Somebody's gotta do it. And I want to know if your kid has a fucking allergy and needs an EpiPen. Which they do sometimes. Yeah. And I need to know how to use it and I need your permission for me to use it if you're not there. This shouldn't be volunteer.

This sounds like a full time job. It's I love It  You're good at it.  No I'm not yet. No? We'll see. We'll see. Also they changed the CPR stuff. It's now, it's, you're supposed to get 120 compressions in a minute. What? 

 It's faster than staying alive. The Red Cross recommends 100 to 120 chest compressions per minute, 30 at a time.

 One of the songs that you could sing in your head that's 120 beats per minute is Wrecking Ball. By Miley Cyrus, came in like a wrecking ball. Now you know!  And you're going to be performing CBR on someone someday and you're going to start singing Miley Cyrus. And you're going to have wrecking ball.

That's perfect. I love it.   I want to talk about Backpack bans. In some schools, in the states, they have backpack bans.

Can you guess why?  Cuz fuckers bring guns.  But it's a backpack. What are you supposed to uh, So they have to carry  clear plastic bags. So where I'm going with this, because our podcast is not about violence and school shootings in America. It's about women, girls, things that bother us.

So we've got 13 year old girls who now have to carry around tampons and pads and it's making them super bent out of shape about their periods. Because you can see it now. And it's easy. I know, to be like, oh, whatever no, it's not when you're a little kid who's just started menstruating, kids are cruel, so they're like hiding it in their hair or trying to put it in their socks and so it's just creating this whole issue.

I have a very clear memory of  trying to take a pad out of my bag and putting it in my pocket without anyone seeing it. And I remember I would hold my knapsack close to my body, take the pad out and cover the transition from bag to pocket so that no one would even know that I was going to use one.

Now I don't give a fuck. No. I'm talking about in high school. Yeah. Oh, yeah. High school sucked. Navigating your period as a teen is already difficult, okay? There's body changes.  It feels shameful even though it's not.

It's just what they're going through as teens. And some girls or want to be homeschooled because they don't want to go to school with their periods,  which is no bueno.  It's another lazy policy that inadvertently treats women as second class citizens. And isn't that always the case? It's so inadvertent that we're second class. Yeah. We didn't mean to. And then you don't want to ask a teacher for a pad.

Filling the bathrooms with pads and tampons. That seems like a good solution. This article is on the cut which if you're not a subscriber, it does have a paywall. So I can read you some of the quotes, a 13 year old in Portland who.

Put one of those super tiny tampons in her bun, like the obi tampons that come without the applicator. A woman who bled throughout a track meet because she wasn't allowed to have her backpack nearby and was too intimidated to ask her old and grouchy female teacher for a tampon. And she said, thankfully, that the  was red. 

Isn't that heartbreaking? I'm getting really emotional about this because that's so fucked. As it is, it's like we have to deal with this period, but then to add another layer of it's difficult? There's another one, another girl who said, she was obviously trying to be discreet about it and a security guard, got up in her face because he thought she was trying to get drugs because of how she was getting it out.

Can you fucking imagine? I just feel badly that there's this idea that they have to hide it and that they have to finagle ways of getting it into the classroom. It's really sad. Some teachers obviously, are empathetic to this, compassionate about this, realizes this is an everyday thing and they keep, a stash.

But that means the kid has to go ask for the teacher.  another suggestion was like, oh, we'll keep one locker filled with stuff. And then it's oh, you gotta go to the period locker? Yeah. No. Someone's gonna paint it red.  she and a colleague, they asked a male administrator whether they could fill an empty locker with books.

Products, but they were rebuffed because it could be used to store contraband. I love that we're equating periods to drugs. it's easy now in our, what did you say early to mid late 30s and 40s. That's the best quote. I don't care. I bleed. Deal with it.

Half of the world's population has a period. Get with it.  It's just like it's a complicated time it's a really big deal in a little girl's life in a tween or teens life and I just can't imagine like Rollin through the hall in a clear bag with my algebra textbook and a fat maxi.

Yeah, because also as a teen, a tampon was not in the cards for me. So Yeah, we used to wear pads and then we'd wear spandex under like our basketball shorts. Because we didn't just want.

Undies, pad, shorts, super spandex to hold it all in there. What an awful time. I remember thinking, can people hear it?  Oh, yeah. Can they hear my pad?  Yeah.  Just imagine though, going to school like that's your life. That's your whole life. Anyway, I was really sad to hear it. The kids are coming around with workarounds, so this one kid's leaving her locker open. So that in case her other friends need it and has a stash in there, which is just like that's so cool That women are resilient in that way though that they'll find little thirteen year olds are like fuck you.

We'll figure it out the vast majority of US schools don't have these restrictions So let's be clear here, but the number that do is growing even though security experts say they This hasn't been proven to prevent a school shooting.

anyway, these poor girls, put tampons and pads in your school bathrooms. Put it in your workplace. How about that? Put it everywhere. Remind your daughters that it's a thing that everyone does. Normalize talking about it. Yeah, you've, it's a period. We all have it. There's a beautiful moment of bonding when one woman looks to another woman and says, Do you have a tampon or a pad?

Absolutely. Wasn't there like an iconic scene in, in Sex and the City. The hostess, the bitchy hostess of this restaurant doesn't let the main characters into the restaurant and they're like, Oh can I use the bathroom? And so they go in and use the bathroom and the hostess doesn't have a  tampon and she, of course, Sarah Jessica Barker goes to the tampon and then they get into the restaurant and it just Oh, that's great. Dramatizes that bond. But it's it really is. It really is.  I know a woman named Dani Stover, who's a great radio host.

She's got a show in Toronto and there's an organization called the Period Purse, and it's Canada's first and only registered charity dedicated to menstrual equality. and they provide free period products through community partners while advocating and educating people from coast to coast about needing to have supplies in the washrooms in every workplace.

It's called Period Purse. It's the idea of treating your period with some dignity and that products should be free essentially is  My friend Dani told I like that. Wanna hear something really, a real bummer of a headline that I read this week? Yes. Yes, hit us with your tragedies. I know what you're thinking. It's hard to be a teen girl, but it's even harder to be a woman in the workplace. Over the past decade, we have I had to think about that. I was like, which was worse?  Both pretty bad. Both pretty bad. Both pretty bad. Yeah. The past 10 years they, obviously we've been working for some equality in the workplace for women, but according to a survey from leanin.

org, we are almost 50 years away from achieving any kind of parity. Yeah. And it's twice as long for women of color. 

With some of the economic circumstance and changes we're going through, I think that's actually going to increase. I bet they're going to do a report in a couple years and it's  Yeah, this is a report from the  Women in the Workplace 2024, the 10th Anniversary Report.

Kinsey Report. 10th Anniversary! Because women have been working for 10 years. Ten years! Oh my god.

  But it's gonna require these companies re commit to this change. They're not gonna commit! I know,  I've got several people in my life who work in that field and do amazing work.

Yeah. my impression is they're very exasperated now. It's absolute balls. It doesn't surprise me. I think we made really good progress, but then there's just so much working against us. everything from child care costs to the quality of education to abortion bans, we talk about, Oh, freedom and freedom would mean choice, which we're apparently we're not cool with.

Some people aren't cool with women having choice, the choice would be If you want to have a family, great, and there's systems in place to be able to do that, but I think that's the biggest thing holding women back. Can you explain something business y to me? Potentially. This study was looking into the representation in corporate roles. Yeah. So it says, there's a certain amount of women in entry level positions, and then there are even fewer in the manager level, even fewer in directors, even fewer in vice president.

And then it references C suite. Yeah. What's C suite? Oh sure, like your chief executive officer, chief operations officer, chief financial officer,  chief technology officer, chief whatever, marketing officer, chief human resources officer. Okay. Those are the ultimate top of the department.

Copy. Who Make most decisions, sometimes have a seat on the board, sometimes don't, but yeah, C suite Is the CEO, COO top. And that explains why there's not many women in there. Okay, good to know there's lots of different factors at play. Yeah.

Women bear children. Yeah. So there's a big drop off. They're in management or senior management roles usually around the time they  thinking about starting a family. There's one person whose career is going to go off the rails there. Yeah. It's not the man. I'd be interested actually in same sex relationships.

 I don't know how much data there is on that, do they split the time and how that impacts, I'd be very curious to read on that. Yeah, I'd be curious to know, so they say women today make up 29 percent of C suite positions and back in 2015.

That seems high. It's high and it's gone up from 17%. I would be curious how many of them are moms. 29 percent I think lots. I think the other thing is  if they're a mom, we underestimate them. And if they don't have children we think they're not mature or handling.

As with the ding dongs who say Kamala couldn't possibly be president because she doesn't have her own biological children. That's just such horseshit. You can't win if you're a mom, by the way, I can tell you that with confidence, and you can't win if you don't have kids.

It is frustrating. And it's interesting to see, you were taken aback by the, 29 percent of women are in C suite positions. Yeah, that sounds high. It is high, but what they're saying is the issue is at the manager level. So it's, there are a lot of women who have gotten to the C suite position, but it's really hard to get there.

Yes. It's almost impossible to go from entry level to go to manager, to then be a senior manager, to then be a vice president, to be a senior vice president, it's also really hard. role. So I've been VP, never been a C unless it's my own company and I make up the title.  It's incredibly challenging.

I will go do a deep dive on these women. Send me the link. I will write, I will go investigate and the shit out of their lives  if this is like Fortune 500 companies, none of those C suites are walking around without support.

Not a one. No. Male or female. No. And we're talking support. It could be family support. It could be personal support. It could be an assistant. We tried at my house to Fuck.  We tried very hard to have two extremely big jobs and grow and grow and grow and grow and have a family.

Yeah. I remember for a stretch we hired a nanny for Saturdays so that we could go work a sixth day of the week.  Yep.  And so it was really hard. And so I don't necessarily believe that you can only have  one big career shiny star  couple, forces work against you if you really want to be both.

 I personally found it very challenging. I'm sure lots of people do it, like the power couples, whatever that  I would have loved to do that, but like  going to gouge my eyes out.  I don't have kids and I still find it hard when both my partner and I are really busy.

Career focused, busy, nailing it, trying to do more, constantly trying to say yes to things. Something does give. something gives, whether it's your relationship with your kids, with each other. What do we do? We can't sit here and be like murr, murr. No, because that doesn't feel good either. I think getting a mentor means a lot. Yeah. If you have the opportunity to, working at companies where there are already women in leadership, or where in the past they've had grow into really successful  Yeah.

Find your allies in the workplace. Working for a good manager if you have  Only if that's your goal. Only if that's a priority for you. Only if that fulfills you.

 There's a lot of smoke and mirrors. Don't do it because it looks good or you think  being on the cover of a magazine is  where you should be. That's just so rare and by the way, a lot of those are pay to play. People pay for that shit. Oh yeah. Or they pay PR firms to get them there. it's not just about, I want to be a C suite or I want to be the vice president. Great. there's three things in work. There's a little Venn diagram 

So do you like what you're doing? Yeah. Are you good at what you're doing and do you get paid to do what you like doing?  Most people have maybe one of those.  Back to the idea of women in the workplace If you feel valued in your workplace, that's really great.

If you like your colleagues, that's really great. If you are making a wage, it's really great. I'm not saying set the bar low. I'm saying, In these uncertain times that's really great. And if you want to succeed, surrounding yourself with other people who are ambitious is really helpful. Make friends, not enemies. Yeah, I have the same thing in the arts, and it's the three Ps. People, project, pay. So I will only do something if it meets two of the three Ps. How's being unemployed?

Yeah, it's great, I'm fine. But this is the kicker, is that if it's a great project and great people, it doesn't matter about the pay. If it's a great group of people and the pay is awesome and the project stinks, That's okay.  getting something out of it.

So for me, if it has to hit the three P's, I do a weekly improv show still. I'm 42, but I love it. It's not a thing. Are you not supposed to do that when you're 42? I don't know how many people my age I know are like, how old's Maya Rudolph? She's not doing a weekly improv show. 

improv? No, it's sketch. It's sketch.   And it's on TV. This is like a live bar show. No, I love it because I love the people and I love the project. And that's great for me. So I know that the work fulfills me and I love it and it keeps me active.

It keeps me creative. I love the people because I've been working with them for 12 years now. Every Sunday, we have a great rapport. This podcast, you pay me so well and I like you. I pay zero  you too can come join us on this podcast for zero dollars. Um, But I like that you said, yeah, so it's a three point system.

And if you have one, that's so good. And right now, don't forget last year was like record layoffs in many industries and they still happen.  I think it's also the same actually in acting or in TV and film. The idea of the C suite people are actually very few. It's the same thing with being famous.

 And right now it's pretty dry out there for your kind, isn't it? Yeah.  I'm bringing it back to the idea of trying to compare yourself to the elite few who have somehow made it.

You can still have a great career in TV and film and not be quote unquote famous. You don't have to be the top of the top to still have a great career. sometimes we, you think you have to keep getting more, keep climbing. But you don't have to. 

 

Okay, look, if you feel like life's getting too hard, maybe you too can find a Picasso.

That's a downer.  A junk dealer. This week, discovered a horrible painting. Ugly, ugly painting. But it turns out it might be a 6. 6 million dollar Picasso.  For years, the owner's son had wondered about this artwork, which features the Spanish painter's signature, which he thought was nothing.

But now some experts think it's the real deal. Can you imagine? An ugly ass painting has been hanging in an Italian family's home for decades and this family has been like this ugly ass painting with and They just hate it. a man named Luigi Roso, a junk dealer is what they call him, which to me sounds not nice.

  So he discovered this canvas in 1962 while rummaging through a basement. It was rolled up, it was in a corner, and it had Picasso's signature in the top left corner.

He found the painting and just didn't know what it was. He's not a cultured man. Didn't really care anything, just like the picture. So he put it His wife said, I hate it. Throw it away. Of course she did. That crazy. No, she has taste,  but not everybody likes Picasso. No. And especially some of his stuff is very experimental and very abstract  and surreal.

they've been doing some research into it. And they are saying that it's likely a Picasso created between 1930 and 1936. Isn't that wild And they're saying there's no doubt that it's his signature.

It's absolutely Picasso's signature, but it's in a different place in the painting, which also made it questionable.  in reality, they believe it is an actual Picasso and it's worth approximately 6.

6 million. Ugh. I love a good story. Isn't that great? I also have a fun story. Six year old starts poop scooping business. He was torn between volunteering and his dream of adopting a cat. And so he started this poop scooping business.  He was torn.  Luca Arpin, better known to his neighbors as Poopa Scoopa Luca. 

say that?  His moniker is well earned as the six year old styled himself the neighborhood's number one to call for cleaning up after dogs and cats. People! Hate picking up dog poop, says the first grader.   he said he has an appreciation for all things tidy and prefers cleaning up above all other activities.

I love Luca. That kid is gonna be a c suite level kid, he's entrepreneurial. His rate is 15 for one dog, 20 for multiple dogs. He even has his own business card.   Luca's mother said that his tendencies to offer help pro bono at the shelter slowly landed him in a predicament where he wanted to afford to permanently adopt a cat, but couldn't afford to do so. so asking his mom how he could earn money, the two settled on Poo Patrol. He has an Instagram, poopa. scoopa. luca. He has 232 followers  and I think you should go follow this little homie. It didn't take him long to save enough money and so he brought Pebble, a little female kitten, also, what a cool moment for a little boy or a little kid to realize that things you want, but you gotta work a little bit for it. You gotta get a little creative. It's a good lesson.

It's a great lesson. And sometimes you gotta do the shitty  I'm not the comedian on the podcast. That was good. Do you want to hear some good news? I love more, more, more, more. The loggerhead sea turtle is getting a comeback. The who? There's a sea turtle that was Near extinct for a long time off the coast of Greece.

They've existed for millions of years and all of a sudden their numbers were dwindling and they have now made a massive comeback.  I love hearing that.

We heard that about the bees a little while ago too, where bees were okay again. They were, I know when we still, no one has answered our question of how the hell do they count? How'd they bees, how'd they get that? I like hearing news about animals that are especially turtles.  'cause they've been around for it.

Ever. Way  the shit they've seen, 

oh, do you know what my kids went to see over the weekend? What? The wild robot, which is an animated feature. Amazing.  Was it good? Very moving film. Yes. Good for adults too? Absolutely. It's based on a book. The book was originally published in 2016. It's illustrated. And it's the story of a robot's adventures in the wild. So a robot becomes a castaway on an island with no human inhabitants. And  that's nice. Yeah, beautiful.

I cried in the trailer, as I do. Highly recommend. I'll put it in the show notes. Anything we mentioned today, any of the articles we quoted from, we'll put in the show notes per uge. Speaking of movies, there's a bunch of really great movies coming out that people are saying, do you read the book before you see the movie?

Yes. I agree. Yeah. And then, maybe I don't see the movie. So the one, I think I mentioned it last week, Small Things Like These by Claire Keegan. Um, Is being adapted into films starring Cillian Murphy.  Based around the, horrific tales of the Magdalene laundries, They treated them very poorly I'll leave it at that. .

But a good read?  Great read. It's a novella. Oh, okay. Yeah, and beautiful.  doesn't waste a word. Did you ever read Interview with the Vampire? No. Because that has been made into a TV show. 

 That's a book where I'm like, maybe I should read that Anne Rice novel  I think I saw the movie but years ago. I've never read it. I would love to. Me neither. I usually read like a horror or gothic. Me neither. I'm a jam. There's a Stephen King Salem lot.

Have you, are you a Stephen King reader? One of his books shakes head nervously. No, it's too scary. I don't love a scary book because I find I'm so impacted by books or movies. It affects you more? It can. Yeah. It can. I saw that Interview with a Vampire is getting a second season, which made me realize there's a first season, and then I realized maybe I should read the book.  The trailer came out for season two of The Diplomat with Keri Russell. Oh, she's so good.

Yeah, and Allison Janie  Yes. And I can't wait. It comes out October 31st, which is a shit night to put something on TV because I will be busy with my humans.

 Keri Russell can do no wrong.  Okay, so we got a question and if you want to ask questions for us to solve your predicaments in completely unqualified ways, you can follow us on Instagram at your weekly breakdown.

the question today, anonymously, obviously, is how do I break up with a friend? And Ooh, I think you do it often and don't worry about it. No. Wow. I think we should be okay with having some friendships that are what's the expression, a season or reason or a  lesson or something like that.

Oh yeah. You should probably look that up and get that quote i, that's a tough question. I know. That's why they fuckin asked it. How do you I guess I'd want to know more, like, why do you have to break up? But maybe that's not important. Maybe the point is Reason, season, and a lifetime.

 There's a poem.  A reason, a season, a lifetime. What did I say? A reason, a season, a lesson. That, too. That, too. That's also good.  We've got to make some assumptions here, like that the friend doesn't want to be broken up with, right?

 For one reason or another, you feel that this has run its course. Yeah. It could be anything to make you feel like shit. Yeah. Only talk about themself. they always say no. When you want to hang out, they said something stupid. Have you ever broken up with a friend? No, but I've just kind of moved.  a quiet approach. Yeah. You've just moved.  You're a ghoster? No,  I think I've just been a shitty person And just slowly remove myself from seeing them, doing anything with them. I think it's possible to do that in a very gentle way.

It depends on the kind of person you are. I've had friend breakups. I've had people break up with me, friend wise. I'm the type to hit it straight on usually, which is very challenging.  I don't try to throw therapy speak their way, but it's more like, I'm not getting what I need out of this or this isn't really working for me.

It depends on if you've already decided or if you're open to making improvements in the relationship. If you've already decided it's done, you either need to like slowly let it unravel or just stop answering them or stop hanging out with them. I would just mute them on social media.

Okay, now you're saying this, I do have a friend that I've broken up with because they, they became a very different version of themselves. And people evolve. And people evolve. Let's be real here. We've got these lifelong relationships with people. We evolve. We change. We come up with different opinions that don't necessarily suit people.

Yeah. And that's what I did. I muted them on social media. Is it me? No. No. Is this someone that I was very close with? And they've become pretty radicalized. In what way? Politically? Politically. COVIDly.  Just, the list goes on where they become this, they're very angry. Yeah. They're really angry at the world.

 hard. That's not on you to know. And so to break up with them is,

I don't know if it's necessary, but what I have said this person has texted me and I've responded with things like, yeah, I don't know what to tell you. I'm not where you're at. Dismissive. Yeah, but also I'm not in the same boat as you, so I don't know what to say. 

I disagree.  Interesting. So, Over some important views in their life, not just a, we've grown apart. No, and not just they're annoying or they're, but I could say to a friend, it's hard to go out with you because every time we go out, you get wasted or I'm not comfortable around this behavior.

 I love the idea that you are the company you keep and if you're around people like that's also how you're associated. If you're not feeling good when you're hanging out with people, they don't, they're not curious about you or they make you feel like shit.

 gotta leave it. But it sounds like that person, this person's made that decision. How do I break up? Yeah. So there's definitely two approaches.  Hit it right on.  Hey, this isn't working for me. I need a little break. Maybe we can reconvene in the future. That's going to hurt their feelings.

Or if you slowly fade away, it's also going to hurt their feelings. So it depends on if you give a shit, if you're going to hurt their feelings or not.   I use this quote all the time. If you expect perfection in your friends, you will not have any.

Yeah, I like that. So you've got to. have some grace when it comes to these relationships with people.  No one's going to knock your socks off every time. No, and also to give yourself the same kindness that you would give a stranger. The idea of telling them something that would maybe hurt their feelings.

You have to think how do I feel when I hang out with I, my feelings get hurt or I don't like that feeling. So why do I have to hold on to it? You don't. You don't. You don't. The other thing is maybe you're shitty. Maybe they're too optimistic and you're going through something rough.

That could be a possibility. I'm trying to think of all the angles that this person could be writing from. They're, maybe they're going through something and they just can't fucking handle this other person's success their laughter, their, I've been that person who's been like, I cannot, she's so upbeat.

I can't. Yeah. Because. Life is hard or I'm struggling, those are really hard grown up things to have to do. I would also say when you're hanging out with the person, you should be honest. You know when you are hanging out with the friend and you're feeling like, really not my vibe anymore.

Or Man, I really didn't wanna come meet you and I'm still here. I think in that moment, in those hangouts if you have the courage and the ability to say. Can we not talk about this or, this is really frustrating how we always end up doing this, or I'm struggling with this vibe, to be specific, I guess is my takeaway to not just text someone and say, Hey, I'm not really feeling this anymore.

I think texting is how you would treat a person you've met once or twice. Yeah, and I just cannot underscore the importance of. In real life, or at least on the phone, if possible. I think it is so important, and it's the least we can do for people that we've spent so much time with. I don't think I would be comfortable going from zero to breakup.

I think I would have to lay a few little  rotten Easter eggs. If this person is a friend,  honor that. Fuck, I hate hearing myself  talk sometimes. But honor that.  gonna just ghost them? No. just gonna not reply? No. I feel like ghosting is such a chicken shit thing to do because then you're just inviting the person to constantly harass you.

I think it's a narcissistic move. You mean the person who ghosts? The person who just disappears? Yeah, I think it's narcissistic. Really? Because then I think you're just leaving the other person thinking about you all the time. I think it's a tactic. You're right. Yeah, I don't like it. Because then the other person's going, what happened?

Where did they go? I wonder where they are. I think it's a full narcissist move. 10 out of 10. So don't ghost. Don't ghost. Because I know you're not a narcissist. Write the email. Make the phone call. Do whatever you need to do. Yeah. Talk it out. Yeah, how do you break up with a friend? I think it sounds like you're decided and it sounds like  you know what you need to do and how to do it.

Sounds like a coffee meetup or a walk and talk. I like a walk and talk. I like a walk and talk and I like your idea of it might mean there's a couple more times we need to see this out. We need to gently let this go. So that they can also maybe be aware, right? Let's say this person is doing X behavior that as a friend isn't conducive to your life.

In those moments that they're doing that X behavior, I think it might be even easier to say, you've been doing this a lot lately and it's driving me crazy. I don't know if you notice this, but you're being really X these days. What about if you're on the other end? What if you're getting dumped?

Yeah. What if your friend dumped? What do you think? I'd want to know why. Because then I could also either care or not care. If someone says, Look, Caitlin, I just can't hang out with you anymore.  you are too, you walk too fast. Okay. I can't hang out with you anymore.

You walk way too fast. Then I can, in my mind go, Oh, I like how I walk. That's on you I think the interesting thing is our, and especially in our twenties, for example, teens and twenties, there's such formative years. We don't necessarily know how we feel about things. I wasn't as sure footed.

Yeah. in my behavior in my youth. No. And I think that would be, that would make it  think adult friendships are a whole other thing. Which is even scarier because we've never really had to break up with a friend before.  In a kind way. But you know what? That's a word we haven't used yet.

Even in this conversation showing some kindness. I guess that was just assumed. It would be different if you're breaking up with a friend because of something they did that was negative.

That's almost easier to be like, yeah, it would be. You lied to me or. Yeah. You stole from me, or you crossed a boundary somewhere. Slept with my ex. You slept with my ex, my boss, my brother, my sister. 

 I'm just reminiscing about my  Oh, they were fun. Oh, fun. I have so many stories about people. I just their names in my little mental black book. And the stupid shit they do when they're naked. Oh, do you  Journal. No. No. Never write. Don't you know? Don't put that shit in writing. I know. Say it.

Forget it. Write it. Regret it. 100%. That's a quote from Dorinda Medley from The Real Housewives of New York. Oh, you can learn so much from reality TV. The people that I used to be attracted to are not my type now. Had someone from university cold call me a few weeks ago. For sex? No, to let me know that,   Haven't  spoken to the   wanted to let you know. How'd he get your number? Same number. Same number, but I didn't know who it was, so I just answered it.

And I was like, now's not a good time. And I panicked. I was like why did I answer the phone? Why did I answer it?

Why did I answer this? Was he going to leave you a voice note? Okay. I don't know. So I answered. So he professed his love? Yeah, but in a real casual way. It's just being like, just want to let you know I've been thinking about, the past and  thinking about you. Oh no. We didn't even date. 

Oh.  Yeah. So he called and I said as soon as I was like, oh hi, he's hey, what's up? In that moment, you're like, are you dying? Yeah. That would be my first thought.  A mutual person that we knew, had recently passed away.

And I was like, oh, that's why he's calling. And I was like, oh, are you calling about our friend? He goes, no, I didn't even know. And I was like, oh he passed away.  He was like, oh, that's so sad. And I was like, look, now's not a good time. Were you afraid? I was just, I just wanted to get off the phone. 

So this is a person you were friends with in university. Yeah. And you haven't talked to in years. 

And he just called to say, but he loves me and he's thinking And at first I was like, Oh, like a buddy.

how did you distinguish between Buddy

slash 

amour?

Amou? Is there a

text? He texted. 

after?  No.

He 

called?

you had a conversation?

He texted

a follow

up



Did you tell Chris? Yeah. Absolutely! Chris was right there and I was like, You're not gonna believe what that was. Yeah, 100%. It felt unwell. I was just taken aback. Cause I also went, you don't even know me. No, not anymore. No, that's, like you have no idea who I am. I know. That's when the ex from university, we'll text or whatever.

And I'm like, you remember my mouth and me being 19 and that's it. Leave that at the podcast. Of course I'll leave that at the podcast.  I'm very proud of my blowjobs. 

I'm trying not to look at your mouth when you say that.  It's a big little pie hole. 

Okay. I responded with kindness. I don't know what to do with this guy. You don't have to do anything. 

He obviously had a thing to say to you. There's no reciprocation that needs to be done.

This was the text after the phone call. Oh my god! Love you. Thrilled to hear your voice. Love you. Love you. A week later after you haven't replied. Love you. Mean it. How's life at You give him  you have a sack? Now? Short version. I miss my old friends. My life is  my past you  to which I responded, Oh, thanks!

I wrote, Oh, thanks! Sorry to hear it's been a weird time. I'm trying to guide it into the friend area. To be like, hey, we're buddies. But even then we're not. And you're not buddies, you're not friends now. I think that's a hard part. If you were friends, and you stayed in touch, and someone reached out to you like that, I there would be an expectation.

You would say, hey man, you good? Yeah, absolutely. Your texts are reading a little funny what's going on? You have some curiosity, but this person isn't your friend anymore. Not for 20 years. Yeah. You don't have to go dive into that and take that on to be your own thing to care for.

No, but my inclination was to go, are you okay? And then I realized the answer is no. You're not asking me for advice, but I'm giving it anyway because I know it was a while ago, but  I would reach out your mutual friend. And be like, hey man, weird text from Bob here. Oh, I sent it to a friend who knew him too. Okay, good. And be like, this is odd behavior. It was a text of, you're not gonna believe who Cole called me. Yeah. And then she was like,  And then we had a little discussion. Not, I don't mean gossip.

No. But being like, what's your take on this? Can you check in on that? But no one really knows this. Like it's an old friend.

That's like a lot. I'm sorry that person's going through something because  life is hard. If it were the other way around, you'd be a little fucking crazy bitch. Everyone would say you're a little psycho. If I had said what? If the rules were reversed.

If I said this to him? Yeah. I've been thinking about you and I love you. I'd be a Looney Tune. I know, we're like, oh, the poor guy. Oh, give him grace. And if it was a girl, we'd be like, crazy stalker bitch. Learn boundaries.  Oh, we're the problem. 

 

I love a little   Like last night, should I have gone out for a full bottle of wine and a Boston Pizza? It's a questionable move for a weeknight, but Sure.

It was a birthday party to be fair  bottle.  Yeah, today rough. Yeah. Oh, I'll share this. I know we have to go,  do you use eye drops ever? No. Okay, My eyes are a dead giveaway to how I'm feeling sometimes and they get itchy.

Actually, same.  And they or they can get red. So usually I use Normal ass eyedrops, okay? This is, we are aging ourselves today. Just regular eyedrops. But then, I heard about a different kind of eyedrops. Oh my god.  So I got two. What kinds do you have? This is just like a Sustane, like a regular like Visine, whatever.

Yeah. But this is Lumify. sounds like a lighting company. Okay, so you can only use four drops every 24 hours. What's in it? It's intense. Cocaine.  It's gotta be cocaine. It's cocaine for the eyeballs. Because nothing brightens an eye like Lumify. Makes it white?  White.  Brimonidine? Huh.

tartrate. Brimonidine? Brimonidine, I don't know. I don't know. But let me tell you, if you need a quick pick me up, you're going to a dinner, you're tired. You want to look not fucking stoned. You want to look not tired or stoned or underslept or like you have allergies, Lumify.

 That really sounds like a lighting company, I'm so sorry. It does, right? Because it lumifies your eyes.  Now, is this 40? Yeah. So did you, do you have it in right now? No, cause I used it last night, so I had to give myself a break.  God. Because it's pretty intense. It must constrict the blood vessels. Yeah, jesus Christ. You know what's crazy? Look at that. I just bought it because I love it.

This was one of the Eye drops. Working in TV and film, you get a lot of make up tricks and tips.  And this was one of them. Before I go on camera, a little Lumify.  The medication lowers the pressure by allowing better fluid drainage from within the eye and also by reducing the amount of fluid formed in the eye.    📍 Oh, aqueous humor production and stimulates aqueous humor outflow. Ha.  

Okay friends, we are done here.

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we really appreciate it. Better yet, if you know another busy woman, send this to her. Sharing is caring. We love being here with all of you, Emily, and I love being here with you. This is one of the highlights of my week, I gotta say. We're so happy to hang out with you on Spotify or wherever else you listen to your podcasts.

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