TODDTalks! Design Your Best Life

Navigating Through the Storm of Anxiety with Shane Murphy - Episode 154

August 23, 2023 Todd Andrewsen / Shane Murphy Season 3 Episode 154
Navigating Through the Storm of Anxiety with Shane Murphy - Episode 154
TODDTalks! Design Your Best Life
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TODDTalks! Design Your Best Life
Navigating Through the Storm of Anxiety with Shane Murphy - Episode 154
Aug 23, 2023 Season 3 Episode 154
Todd Andrewsen / Shane Murphy

Are you drowning in the sea of self-criticism? Feel like anxiety is a constant companion? Let Shane Murphy, a skilled psychotherapist, guide you towards the shore of peace and positivity. Shane and I navigate the turbulent waters of the mental health crisis that has washed over the globe, fueled by the coronavirus pandemic. The isolation and online dependency caused by lockdowns have left many of us gasping for breath, struggling with panic attacks and anxiety. Join us as we demystify these feelings, offering insights into recognizing and managing these overwhelming foes.

We dive deeper into the ocean of our minds, highlighting the often forgotten power of our inner voice. Amid the noise of societal expectations and digital media, Shane and I reveal that most of our thoughts are self-critical. However, there is a buoyant lifeboat within our reach! By flipping these stats, making the majority of our thoughts positive, we can cultivate a serene seascape of the mind. We discuss techniques like gratitude, meditation, journaling, and affirmations, all geared to empower your inner voice and help you ride the waves of positivity.

Finally, we explore the bright horizon of happiness, often veiled by the fog of daily grind. Tap into your inner child and rediscover the joy and fun you might have lost over time. Laugh, love your job, and absorb the positive vibes. We'll share advice on how to use physical activities to reduce stress and how to listen to your body's distress signals. Don't miss Shane's wisdom on carving out time for meditation and staying present with your emotions. Tune in, and let's set sail towards designing your best life!

We also discuss our plans to have a 12-week program that will launch the first of October where you can sign up for 6 weeks of therapy for anxiety, followed by 6 weeks of mindset training to keep what you've learned, and throughout you will get 6 sessions of healthy eating discussion because the body and mind are intertwined. 

Stay tuned for more info on that and right now, learn some more ways to work on your stress levels.

Support the Show.

12-week plan: Establishing the 5 Pillars of Wellness - How you can improve your life in each area.

You can sign up for your initial consult at my Calendly link here: https://calendly.com/toddtalksllc/initialconsult

You can reach me anytime at
email: tandrewsen.monat@gmail.com
Instagram @toddtalks_ig

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Show Notes Transcript Chapter Markers

Are you drowning in the sea of self-criticism? Feel like anxiety is a constant companion? Let Shane Murphy, a skilled psychotherapist, guide you towards the shore of peace and positivity. Shane and I navigate the turbulent waters of the mental health crisis that has washed over the globe, fueled by the coronavirus pandemic. The isolation and online dependency caused by lockdowns have left many of us gasping for breath, struggling with panic attacks and anxiety. Join us as we demystify these feelings, offering insights into recognizing and managing these overwhelming foes.

We dive deeper into the ocean of our minds, highlighting the often forgotten power of our inner voice. Amid the noise of societal expectations and digital media, Shane and I reveal that most of our thoughts are self-critical. However, there is a buoyant lifeboat within our reach! By flipping these stats, making the majority of our thoughts positive, we can cultivate a serene seascape of the mind. We discuss techniques like gratitude, meditation, journaling, and affirmations, all geared to empower your inner voice and help you ride the waves of positivity.

Finally, we explore the bright horizon of happiness, often veiled by the fog of daily grind. Tap into your inner child and rediscover the joy and fun you might have lost over time. Laugh, love your job, and absorb the positive vibes. We'll share advice on how to use physical activities to reduce stress and how to listen to your body's distress signals. Don't miss Shane's wisdom on carving out time for meditation and staying present with your emotions. Tune in, and let's set sail towards designing your best life!

We also discuss our plans to have a 12-week program that will launch the first of October where you can sign up for 6 weeks of therapy for anxiety, followed by 6 weeks of mindset training to keep what you've learned, and throughout you will get 6 sessions of healthy eating discussion because the body and mind are intertwined. 

Stay tuned for more info on that and right now, learn some more ways to work on your stress levels.

Support the Show.

12-week plan: Establishing the 5 Pillars of Wellness - How you can improve your life in each area.

You can sign up for your initial consult at my Calendly link here: https://calendly.com/toddtalksllc/initialconsult

You can reach me anytime at
email: tandrewsen.monat@gmail.com
Instagram @toddtalks_ig

Todd:

Welcome to ToddTalks where I help you design your best life Not the life I designed for you, but the life you desire. I know it's been a while, but today I'm pleased to have on with me Shane Murphy. You know him as my psychotherapist friend that helps me delve into the realm of mental health, because there's a mental health crisis going on in the world and if you haven't seen it, you're probably part of it. So today, welcome to the show, Shane. Glad to have you on again. I love doing these things episodes together. How have you been?

Shane Murphy:

I've been very good, you know, relaxing in Ireland and having a bit of fun, and even my best life in Ireland without the good weather. But we'd survive without weather. We can't control that.

Todd:

Well, I do have to admit, living in Florida now as I do, we are blessed with lots of good weather and lots of amazing thunderstorms in the afternoons, but sunny weather, hot temperatures and the ocean right nearby, so I can't really complain. The ocean does so much for my soul.

Shane Murphy:

Yeah, and you're saying there in the intro about the mental health crisis. It's definitely I'm seeing it more and more it definitely seems to be gaining strength, and especially around the world, and it's just sad to see, you know. I mean I think you and I have mentioned before like that the new pandemic is going to be mental health, and not only is, it is now. It's not future tense at all anymore, it's present tense, you know.

Todd:

Yeah, you and I have talked many times offline about the mental health crisis that's going on in Ireland, that's going on in the UK and really the rest of the world, brought about in part because of the, in large part because of the government reactions to the coronavirus pandemic, which caused people to lose a lot of faith in society, which caused them to lose a lot of social interaction. What, in your opinion, is the one, the cause of the mental health crisis, and what are some of the symptoms that people go through as they're starting to develop this overwhelm, overstressed anxiety? What are some of the symptoms that they may notice?

Shane Murphy:

Well, I suppose to start your question like I mean, what? What? I think the mental health crisis was happening, pre-pandemic, annual, I think we were a society, societies around the world. The mental health was getting, you know, stronger and stronger. There was more and more suicides, there was more and more people complaining, there's even more and more people checking into mental homes and stuff like that.

Shane Murphy:

I think the I think it's known fact now that the lockdowns didn't work, and not only did it not work, but they've caused a huge amount of anxiety and stress among people. You have people who never struggled with any anxiety ever in their life, who now have anxiety, have social anxiety and they worry so much about going out into society and meeting people. And, yes, there's the aspect of COVID, but there's also the aspect of, you know, being cut off from society. And I think the pandemic is getting worse now because you had your 16 to 17 year olds that were caught up in that and they never really developed those life skills, those life skills that they need for interaction with people. And then society has kind of accepted more and more of the online aspect, the working from home and stuff like that, where you have more and more people who don't interact with human beings, other human beings at all. If they live at home on their own, if they're in an apartment on their own, they're just online working, and I know of clients and I know of people who online work and when they're finished they have their tea and then after that they just go on to online games, go to bed, wake up, repeat and do that at weekends and they're not interacting with people.

Shane Murphy:

And I do think that that is one of the big things that we have at the moment is that it's creating that anxiety and that social anxiety. And to answer your second part, I suppose the main things that people notice around anxiety always is that physical aspect sweaty palms, tightness in your chest, stomach is doing huge amount of butterflies and you feel like you're getting sick and stuff like that and it's always the physical ones. And there's way I have never you know I'm an anxiety expert now over two years and I have never seen the amount of clients that are struggling with panic attacks and having to go to the hospital actually thinking that they're actually having heart attacks. And it's strange when you have people who are 25, 26 and they're thinking they're having a heart attack rather than a panic attack.

Todd:

Yeah, that's not normal.

Shane Murphy:

No, it's not normal and I generally haven't seen such a large proportion of people who have panic attacks coming in now and seeing them, and not only just clients but people I know of and stuff like that. And, as you know or people might not realize, I mean anxiety. You know, when it gets really, really stressful. That's what causes a panic attack. And a panic attack is just basically your body, your cortisones and everything in your body just basically reacting to that stress and then that just builds up inside your body and you literally you just go into panic and your whole body. And I mean the average. I've done a radio show on it there a couple of weeks ago on panic attacks and the average panic attack lasts about three minutes.

Todd:

But to the person experiencing that it probably lasts a whole lot longer.

Shane Murphy:

It feels like it's an awful lot longer, but I mean, the actual initial panic attack itself is about three minutes. The after effects are still going on afterwards, but the actual, really bad panic is only three minutes long. A lot of people out there would say that the best way to cure like a panic attack comes about when you get really really stressful from anxiety and your stress levels are really really high and you do everything to try and stop those stress levels from getting high and that creates the panic attack and everybody would say that the best way to get through a panic attack is actually to just let it go Now easier said than done, where you feel this panic attack coming on and you just go and you just let it go and that's then the panic attack won't happen and it will just go out of your system.

Shane Murphy:

But that's easier said than done, because your whole body is going into spasms and then you're saying in your head, oh, shane said to let this go, you're not going to let it go. But I suppose for me it's about getting the people to recognise in themselves that they to notice these stresses when they are going to happen, and notice these stresses in their body so that they can actually stop it and calm it down. And bring in the different tools that I would teach them about how to calm the body down. Calm the nervous system down, come into the present, stop overthinking about what's actually going on in themselves and just slow the body down and just bring everything back to the present is the key, like, really like. So for me it's about coming in and catching them before they even get to the stage of anxiety or stress.

Todd:

I think you hit one of the key points right there. It's the overthinking. So much of our society. We're told to look inward, tune into yourself, and we look at social media and we compare ourselves to everybody.

Todd:

There's an epidemic of comparison going on where all you see of everybody around you is what they post, the good things going on in their life, the happiness, and so we compare ourselves with Jane or Joe next door or our friends that seem to have it all together and we know that it's bull. We know that it's bull crap, because some of them we have a personal connection with and we know that what they post online is false. But we still end up mentally comparing ourselves to everybody online and just build up that stress, that mental stress where we start overthinking and overthinking and saying, well, I should do this better, I should do this better, and we start that negative spiral, that negative spiral of thinking. And that internal dialogue causes so much stress and anxiety, as you put it. If we can catch that dialogue before it gets to the point where we're starting to have spasms, that's where we can really help ourselves, because nobody else can. Someone like you can teach you exactly how to cure those problems.

Todd:

And I mean it's still something that they have to learn.

Shane Murphy:

Oh yeah, I mean, look, we all learned it. I mean, it's just that we thought you're right. We have fallen into a society now with mobile phones and Instagram and all that sort of stuff, that we are living in the world of comparison and comparing ourselves. And then those thoughts that come into our head and, as I say to clients, wouldn't it be great if the voice in your head was actually telling you positive things and telling you what a great person you are and motivating you to get out of bed in the morning and all that sort of stuff? That would be great. But it exists within us.

Shane Murphy:

Our own voice is inside us. It's said that it's been noised out by all the rest of the stuff that's going on. And our voice in our head for most people, is this quite tiny little voice in the corner. It's buried so deep inside us that it hasn't got a chance to actually speak out. No, you would never tell yourself that you're useless or that you'd never actually achieve anything, or that you're not as good as that of Mary next door, and that your own voice would never, ever, ever tell you that it would be counterproductive. And I doubt very much if God would actually do that to you, unless he wants a laugh at you or something like that.

Shane Murphy:

But your voice that's inside your head is really. It's about giving that voice back the power, bringing that voice back up to the forefront, because that voice should always be telling you those positive things, congratulating you, telling you, getting you out of bed, stopping you from procrastination, and all that. Because it's your voice Out between society, social media, other people, parents and teachers and stuff like that. It's all being drowned out and it's another part of the pandemic that we're talking about mental health and people with the voices in their head. It takes a good few sessions to help them to actually understand that those voices. You shouldn't let them win. You know. I suggest things like giving the voice something like Mickey Mouse's voice or something like that, or Pat Simpson or something like that or someone really annoying, and giving it that voice so that you actually can actually in your head split the voices into to find your own voice. You know so little tips like that can be really good but it is hard going like with people, like with the negative thought patterns in their head.

Todd:

Yeah, I remember seeing the statistics, something to the effect of you know, we have 20 or 40,000 thoughts a day or more, and of those, 70% or more are self critical and the things that we say in our thoughts about ourselves we wouldn't even say to our closest friend or our worst enemy because we're so critical of ourselves.

Todd:

But I believe that that, like you, that that's not our true voice. Our true voice is in there telling us that no, we matter, we can do anything we put our mind to. We have to learn to drown out the critical, which is the critical voices are learned behaviors when learned subconscious thought that we've picked up from our childhood onward, anything negative we readily just store in our brain and think that that's us. And I've also heard, in the same scenario, statistics that the happiest people have flip flop those numbers, that 70% or more, 90% even, of the thoughts in their head towards themselves are positive, with only 10% negative. Because they've been able to flip flop those voices and let them let that inner there, the voice that truly is them, come to the forefront.

Shane Murphy:

Well, I would say that I'm one of those 70%, but I also would say that maybe 10 years ago, I was the person who constantly had that negative thought in my mind, constantly telling me that I can't achieve anything, you'll never do something that stupid, constantly if you make a mistake, belittling myself all the time, like you know. Whereas now I can generally say that I can say that all the negative voices are completely gone, but even when the negative voices come in now, at the moment, I say to myself no, that's not you, shane, that's not you speaking and I would say it out loud as well, by the way, shane, no it's not you, you're the one that actually tells yourself the positive things.

Shane Murphy:

You don't knock you. And, as I was saying to someone today, stepping into the positive and being in the positive takes a lot of work. It takes you, takes me getting up in the morning having the gratitude, doing my meditations in the morning, doing a bit of journaling. It takes myself in the evening doing long walks. And it also takes during during the day affirmations. So I have to do all this work to keep it out. But when you think of the people who are constantly stuck in the negative, that negative voice is going 24 seven. So they're working on their negativity all the time as well. So it would sense that you have to work on being positive and staying positive. And the longer length of time that you step into that positivity and stay positive, you, you get better at it, it gets easier, you're able to move that percentage and that dial.

Shane Murphy:

And a lot of people would say to me but Shane, you can't be positive all the time. And I would say says who, why can't I be positive? But I'm not saying that I don't feel sad. Sometimes I don't feel. You know different, the different different. You know, sometimes I feel like I can't get out of bed in the morning and stuff like that. It takes an extra effort to actually get out of bed. And you know I feel anger. You know I still feel all the emotions. But it's just that how I deal with them, and I deal with them in the present tense and I let them go. And you know, in a perfect world Eckhart Tolle would say, in a perfect world that we each take each day as it is and you can't control what happens yesterday and you can't control what happens tomorrow. You can only control the present. So when you move into tomorrow, whatever happened today is past tense, so you just carry on with your day.

Todd:

You know, one of my one of my favorite quotes is in the Nias Nin quote where she says we see things not as they are, but as we are.

Todd:

And so when we are like you, you're living in the present and you're able to be present and continue that presence as you leave yesterday behind and continue into today.

Todd:

You can be happy all the time, whereas if you are stuck thinking about well, you know, last week somebody did me wrong and last yesterday was a terrible day and I didn't sleep well last night and you know the movers are probably going to destroy my stuff when, when that eventually gets here, you know this house is too small and you just start and you become that negative You're not, you're not living in the present and focusing on the gratitude Then then you become and your perspective is negative because your thinking is negative. But my favorite thing about all of it and I mean this is what we do, this is why I think we become such good friends is we understand that just because we are one way now doesn't mean that we have to stay that way forever. We can totally change who and what we are by the choices we make and if we're suffering from anxiety or stress or any of that. That doesn't mean we're doomed to stay that way forever. We can change it.

Shane Murphy:

That's it. You know, and I mean that's what you and I are about, living proof of that. And you know I can say that I've changed and evolved my life. You know I'm you know I was only talking to someone the other day. You know, I'm 52 years of age now and if I was to talk to 39 year old Shane and tell him what I'm doing in my life, he would laugh and say there's no way you could achieve that, there's no way we could be a psychotherapist and at the time I was working in supermarkets, I hadn't even done third level education, I'd never got a degree for myself.

Shane Murphy:

And Shane, in present tense, is a psychotherapist, runs a cancer support center, has my own radio show, does workshops, does all these talks on different podcasts about how we can actually change ourselves. And since I was 39 years of age, I've gone back to college, I've got a university degree in psychotherapy, I'm running a cancer support center, I've got a podcast, I do support groups, I do workshops. I also have good leisure time, which is the key, and I have fun and I'm really, really happy and I can generally say that I'm happy in every aspect of my life now at this stage. You know, and that's in the space of 13, 14 years, which is nothing it is.

Todd:

It's a change so quickly when we, when we try, when we give, give our minds the opportunity to change. And one of the things that I love is you add it in there that you have fun, Because where does so much of our stress and anxiety come from? It comes from the overthinking, the overworking, the over stimulating everything. On the negative, Well, what? What we teach, what we do, what what Todd talks is all about is designing the life you want to live right, and one of the things that makes life livable is when we actually take time to take care of ourselves and learn to have fun again. Who says that only children are able to have fun and play?

Shane Murphy:

And I mean that is the key, like you know, I mean I do an awful lot of inner child work and it's about connecting in with that child like self. It's about skipping down the street, if you feel like skipping down the street. It's about dancing in the rain. Dancing in the rain, or I, I, I was walking down the street the other day and there was a hopscotch in front of me and I and I got up and I, I did my hopscotch and I threw the stone down, I, I was on my own, I had such a great laugh doing it, like you know. And it is about connecting into that, that inner child, connecting into that fun, because as a child you know you're so free, you don't have to, you don't be thinking about the mayors and the Johns, you don't think about any anything, you just, you just literally do and you don't care about the consequences. And to be able to tap back in with that and tap back in with that fun and that joy and that laughter. And I suppose, another aspect I was just thinking, as you were saying, about the funness.

Shane Murphy:

I love all my jobs, I love everything that I do in my life and that makes life easy. I get up in the morning and I go. Yes, I can't wait to go and start my day. I can't wait to to work with clients. I can't wait to do this. I can't wait to do the radio show I can. You know, I love every aspect of my life and that's the key. So many people on this planet are caught in jobs that they absolutely hate doing, but they're staying in the job because it's a good pension or it's a good wage, or they have to pay for this or they have to pay for that. But you don't have to live your life. You get one life. This is it. This is it we were, we're, we're born when we're born. We die when we're die. And the bit in the middle should be about you and about fun and about doing things that you really want to do for the rest of your life.

Todd:

And I would, I would. I would argue also that not everyone can just up and change their job right away, but what they can change and I hope you can't hear the baby crying in the back back room- it's your inner child.

Shane Murphy:

It's your inner child.

Todd:

Well, my, yeah, my daughter's putting her, our grandbaby to sleep in the other room. But what? What I would argue is that people that can't change their current job right Because of circumstances or whatever, what they can change is their attitude and the fun that they have on the job. They can make the job again. Cause, I mean, over the last 26 years that I was in the military, there were a lot of things that were not fun, but I can honestly say that I always had fun when I was working in the military.

Todd:

I retired in July and why did I always have fun? Because, mentally, I decided a long time ago that it was a game and I had fun with it. I was not a typical officer. I was not a typical anything, because I would joke around and have fun no matter what. Yeah, I was serious when I had to be serious, but I made it fun. I enjoyed the people I was with. Maybe we were in tense situations where it was stressful and tense, and what did we do? We made fun little word games or joking around that we could do to break the tension. We always found ways to make it enjoyable, even when it wasn't. That's things that people can do just to change their day is to even if they hate their job, you can find something to make the work more enjoyable until you can go on to something that you truly want to do, because you're right.

Shane Murphy:

You're right. There is a large proportion of people that are listening to this show and will actually say, well, that sounds great, shane, but I do have a family, I do have a mortgage and all that. But you can make work enjoyable. You can do things around work that are enjoyable just because your job is unenjoyable Get out for walks during your break or something like that. Or go to the gym or something that Make it easier.

Shane Murphy:

We get again an awful lot of people in the job that they're getting caught up in. They're caught up in the stress and worries again of things that have happened in the past and this person said that person and that person said that, and it gets a bit bitchy and stuff like that. They get caught up in all that sort of stuff. One of the great things about being human beings is that every day we have a reset. I think it was Bruce Lipton who said about that.

Shane Murphy:

All our cells in our body change every day. If our cells in all our cells in our body change every day, we should be able to change every day. Every day we have a reset. If you could think of that in your mind, that every day you wake up. It's a reset, it's a start, it's getting out of that groundhog day. If we could all live in a society where we did have a reset every day, where all the problems and all the stresses from the day before can be left in the day before and we start a fresh every day, what a wonderful society we'll be living in.

Todd:

Oh, it would be. Here's a thought for you exactly on that. Every night when we go to sleep, our brain literally resets. Chemicals flush through our brain, remove out toxins and sludge that is caused, that's created from thinking. It's literally flushed out of our brain every night when we sleep. That's why sleep is so important so that we can remove all that from our brain. We're literally not just figuratively, but we literally reset our brain. Every night. We wash out all the negative, all the bad cells. The cells that have dropped off and died get flushed out and new ones have taken their place.

Shane Murphy:

I mean, that's what dreams are about rewiring and refixing of your brain.

Todd:

I had some strange dreams this week. It was cool. I haven't had some weird dreams in a while, so it was pretty fun to have a couple of weird dreams. I don't even remember the dream, except I remember that I kept having to get in driving somewhere, get in the car, get out of the car, do something. Every time I was getting in the car a whole bunch of sheep had climbed into the driver's seat and had to push the sheep out of the way. I don't even know why, but it was hilarious. I woke up. I'm like that was the strangest dream I've had in a long time.

Shane Murphy:

What you had fun in it.

Todd:

I did. Of course, I always have fun. Life is too short not to have fun. This morning I went to the gym, and that's another thing that I wanted to add for stress and anxiety support. To help you reduce stress and anxiety, just get to the gym, workout, play a sport, go on a walk, do something to get your body moving, because the endorphins that are produced are stress relieving.

Shane Murphy:

They say even if you can get out for one five minute walk in a day, that gets endorphins moving and you feel better, what does?

Shane Murphy:

that mean Before I came on the show, I went for a nice long walk by the sea, even though I was saying to myself I'm on my tired now in a half an hour I don't really have time. I made the time. I walked up, I saw the sea and I walked back down. I'm still back on. To come on to you with your show People who say that they don't have time to go for a walk, getting out, getting into the fresh air, getting a bit of sunshine on you, especially in Ireland when you don't have it that often.

Todd:

It's so important Because, like you said, even five minutes is so important, because those endorphins take and kill the cortisol hormone. And what cortisol is? It's a stress producing hormone. It's your body produces it when under stress, and so the more you have, the more stressed you are, and so those endorphins they take it and they get rid of it, they flush it out of your system, which helps to relieve that stress. But what I wanted to say about that is that what is so nice about?

Todd:

I went to the gym this morning and there were a couple of young guys that I've worked with here and so we started joking around because I started lifting weights again and so I was grabbing heavier weights and so we started joking about who could lift heavier and we were doing different things with dumbbells and curling and it just was a fun little five minute activity with these couple of guys. But it just starts the day off Great when you can just have that little bit of fun and I got exercise in. I woke up tired but I went to the gym anyways because I built that habit and left the gym and I was totally relaxed, and that's probably one of the keys for me is doing these things relaxes your body and your mind, because when you're relaxed it's really hard to be anxious, it's really hard to be stressed.

Shane Murphy:

And there's a lot of studies coming out. And one of the great things about psychotherapy these days is that there's so much research coming out that actually proves that meditation works to calm you down and they back this up with papers and I think I'm doing a course on neuroplasticity, which is the wiring's in the head, and all that sort of stuff, and it's really, really huge to just look at the research they have coming out, the proof of the different cortisones and the different things and how they interact and how it affects depression, how it affects anxiety. And one of the things about us and this hemisphere, the Western hemisphere, is we've heard so many times from about Buddhists and stuff like that about meditation that works. The same present works and people kind of go out or whatever. But when they can see on paper that it actually works, that they actually have data that actually works, they go oh, I'll do that now because it works and really I don't care why people meditate, as long as they meditate, and I suppose, going back to believe it or not. There was an original question there about 20 minutes ago where we were talking about the ways of actually helping people to reduce stress and we've covered an awful lot of them at the moment, but for me it's the gratitude in the morning having that gratitude, spending, you know, before my live show.

Shane Murphy:

I do a three minute meditation. And the way I introduce my three minute meditation is I put on the very first time I put on a song, a very popular song. It was exactly three minutes long, and I asked people, did they enjoy it, did they listen to it, did they have fun with it? And they all said yeah, yeah, I did. And I said, well, it only takes three minutes to meditate. And I'm gonna do a three minute meditation for you now and you know, feel into it and you don't have to. Like I say to people say, oh, I don't have time to meditate, so you can meditate when you're brushing your teeth, you know.

Shane Murphy:

So there is time to meditate and to actually find that time and finding the time to be present. Because you know, every evening I would give myself 10 to 15 minutes of not on the phone, not on anything, and I just sit with me and I noticed what's going on in my body. If there's a pain in my shoulder, if there's pain there, if you know, if there's a pain in my body, I kind of maybe go. Okay, why have I got a pain in my shoulder? Oh, if I banged it I'd say, okay, granted, that's what it is, but maybe there's something going on here. Maybe that pain in my shoulder is, maybe I'm carrying a little bit of too much. Have I carrying a little bit too much stress in my body today that I get triggered by something?

Shane Murphy:

I give myself the space to actually sit with my feelings and emotions, sit with what's going on in our body, because this body that we were given is a gift and this gift that we were given tells us all the time what's going on, what's happening, what's going on in our world. And in my business of working with people with cancer, I see more and more people who have cancer but they didn't listen to their body telling them that their body is unwell, are sick or there's something going on. And again going back to what we're saying about mobile phones, the mobile phones and your Netflix, and all that is distracting people from actually figuring out what exactly is going on in their body. So the tips are meditate, getting out and having fun, as we said, and having a bit of a laughter, getting some sort of a routine into your life, a routine that actually involves fun.

Shane Murphy:

Get out, go for walks, get into nature and stuff like that. Teach yourself to start staying present, because our mind is racing so much. Be present with you. Other tips are drinking plenty of water. I mean they might sound like a trivial ones, but drinking plenty of water, taking your vitamins, watching the type of food that you eat and some of the food can actually have a cause and effect on our anxiety and there are just a few different tips of how to actually get people to start calming down and get. And they're like when a client comes into me for the very first time and because I specialize in anxiety, I get large proportion of clients that are just anxiety and the first thing I talk to them about is meditating and having gratitude in their life, and then we start working from there.

Todd:

Well, that's awesome, you know. I wanted to bring up to the listeners that Shane and I are working on the project right now that we're hoping to launch around the 1st of October, a project where we are going to offer a program that together, where you will get six sessions working with him, six sessions afterwards working with me and during that, also six sessions with a nutritionist Claire a nutritionist because it's a mind-body connection for all of this and to get overcoming anxiety, overcoming stress. There's a mind-body connection and so we're working on a program. Just wanted to let you know that this is something that we are gonna do and we are gonna come out with, and you will hear it here and be able to link up with us and sign up for that. That is something that we're looking to do around the 1st of October, but I love working with you, shane. This has been very good information for people today. I think there is a mental health crisis going on and, as always, you and I are working to help people overcome it.

Shane Murphy:

Yeah, definitely, and you know, I suppose this program that we're designing and putting together at the moment you know you and I are very similar mindset as far as what we want and how we can actually help people and I think, collaborating with a mindset coach like yourself, psychotherapist like myself and Claire that's a nutritionist, I think we can offer the whole package about actually trying to help people. And I mean those the 12 weeks that we're talking about of actually doing that. I generally think that we're actually going to be able to help an awful lot of people with that program. And you know, across waters and all that you've been living in America and me being here. You know maybe we can try and actually help an awful lot more people, because that's the ultimate goal to help people, to help people to actually live the better life.

Shane Murphy:

I can tell you from the hundreds of clients that I've actually worked with ones that have gone on and run maritons and other ones that have actually gone on and had successful careers and successful relationships and all that sort of stuff it works. What I do, what we offer, it works and people do get a better life and it's not going to take years. It's not going to take. People probably listen to me when I said oh, it's 10 to 12 years for me to get to where I am now, but I was feeling better before I got to where I am now. It's every day. It's about expanding and getting better and seeing more things and collaborating with people like yourself and changing that mindset, because even when we do podcasts together, I actually say to myself I've learned something new there, you know.

Todd:

I learned something new every time we talk, and I love it. That's and that's the whole thing. If we're not growing, we're shrinking, exactly, and so the more people that we can help, that's the goal. That's exactly. Thanks for coming on. That is the reason for Todd Talks Design your best life. It's not, and the reason I open it with not the life I designed for you, but the life you desire, is because, truly, I want you to be the director and designer of your dream life. You can live it. You don't have to be stuck, and Shane and I are here to help, and you can reach us at.

Todd:

Well, it'll be in the show notes. We have different, different ways that we can be reached. We're on Facebook, we're on Instagram, we're on LinkedIn. Reach out, tell us what you like, tell us what, leave a comment. We love comments that tell us and, as always, you can always leave a five star review. That just helps it get seen by more people. Pass it on to a friend so that, if you know somebody that's struggling or you are struggling, whether it's with anxiety, overwhelm, stress and this is something that would benefit them Send them the link and, as I always like to say, have a blessed day.

Shane Murphy:

Thanks, sir.

The Mental Health Crisis and Overthinking
Empowering Your Inner Voice
Finding Joy and Fun in Life
Tips for Reducing Stress and Anxiety
Design Your Best Life