Death to Life podcast
A podcast that tells the stories of people that used to be one way, and now are completely different, and the thing that happened in between was Jesus.
Death to Life podcast
#270 Jacob Walda: How A Diluted Gospel Fueled Hidden Sin
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We sit down with Jacob Walda to talk about how a “heaven someday” gospel left him trapped in cycles of sin until Scripture and the power of Jesus rewired his identity. We trace the turning points that moved him from shame and confusion to freedom, discernment, and a life shaped by prayer and mission across Canada.
• growing up churched with a list of rules and little power
• college compromise, pornography struggles and the “fake Christian” sting
• a concussion that forces a life audit and a return to God’s call
• simple Bible and prayer habits that spark real change at home
• studying Acts through Revelation and confronting the “wretched sinner” lens
• Romans 6, baptism and learning to count ourselves dead to sin
• weighing teachers by love and fruit rather than internet noise
• building a consistent secret place and a mobile prayer shed
• leaving pastoral work after fasting, visions and a new direction
• evangelism, healing and Spirit-empowered ministry across Canada’s Arctic
• a challenge to pray, seek God diligently and obey quickly
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Why The Gospel Still Changes Lives
SPEAKER_02The world doesn't think that the gospel can change your life, but we know that it can. And that's why we want you to hear these stories: stories of transformation, stories of freedom, people getting free from sin and healed from sin because of Jesus. This is death to life.
SPEAKER_00I think I knew enough when I looked at the world that I was like, I don't want to be in there and I don't want to go and do all those things. But then when I went to university, the gospel was so powerless in my life. Apart from like, I know I'm, I know I'm going to heaven. Like that part wasn't going to change. But when I got to university, I started drinking, started cussing, started sleeping around. Pornography was a big vice and all this other stuff because it was just about going to heaven one day. And so I would do something bad and feel awful about it. But my understanding was so solid of like, I know I'm going to heaven that when I do all this sin, because I'm a wretched sinner, then that's what I'm going to just do. But I have grace and mercy to help me through it. That was 21 years of my life was like that.
SPEAKER_02Yo, welcome to the Death to Life podcast. I'm your host, Richard Young, and today's episode is with a guy that I have known for so many weeks. Yeah, for like just seven or eight days. And so we are going to have him share his story and what God is doing in his life, and you're going to be encouraged and blessed. So uh the next person you'll hear is Jacob Walda. So buckle up and strap in. Love y'all. Appreciate y'all. How's that for an intro, Jacob? Yeah. It's perfect. That's great. So uh you're Canadian. You've been all you've always been Canadian? Born and raised. Yeah. I have a really uh awesome way of starting these interviews.
SPEAKER_00What part of Canada are you from? I live in a place called Belleville. It's just on the other side of the pond from Rochester, New York, for all my American listeners.
SPEAKER_02Just d how often do you come into Rochester to see what's going on?
SPEAKER_00Uh, you know, hardly ever, if ever at all. I think I've been twice in my life.
SPEAKER_02Really?
SPEAKER_00And it's like how many how many miles is it? It's like a three-hour drive. Okay, three-hour drive. Yeah, like 300 miles, 200 miles. Okay. And you grew how far are you from Toronto? Uh, we're two hours east, and I grew up two hours west of Toronto. So closer to Detroit. We were about two hours from the Detroit at Windsor border where I grew up. Okay.
SPEAKER_02Yeah. And so when it comes to like God and spiritual things in your life, where where would you say that story starts with you?
SPEAKER_00Man, I was raised in a church. I was raised Pentecostal, and I always thought Pentecostals were just the people that got up and spoke in tongues and interpreted and then sat down. And that was it. And my whole upbringing, you know, people talked about reading the Bible and how important it was.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, yeah. Or is something like rubbing together? Like, I'm hearing. You can hear that? What is that? That's my chair rubbing on my desk. I'm like, man, is that I thought it was a somebody's voice. No, no, no. Like, I thought it was Charlie Brown's teacher in the background.
SPEAKER_00Like, did you hear it? Yeah, I could feel it. The arm, it's an adjustable desk. And so if it gets too low, it starts rubbing on the like father. Okay.
SPEAKER_02I thought I was tweaking. I thought it was somebody like literally like in the background of your house. I'm like, man, we should tell them to pipe down. Okay. No, no, you're good. I didn't realize this was that sensitive. Yeah, you got a good mic there. So you say you grew up, you grew up in the church. Is that what you were saying?
SPEAKER_00Yeah. So I grew up churched, and really my only experience with the gospel was this concept that Jesus died for my sins so that I could go to heaven one day. And it left me totally helpless when it came to living like Christ, when it came to living free from anything. And so when I got, you know, into teenage years and all that stuff, uh, people started asking me at school, you know, why why should we come to church? I'd be like, okay, come to church and be like, why? And be like, well, you know, we pray and we're gonna go to heaven one day. And they're like, okay, but like, what else do you do? And I was like, you know, sometimes I read the Bible and we sing songs. And they're like, okay, and like, what else? I was like, well, we don't drink, we don't cuss, we don't smoke, we don't do this. And it was just like a list of things we don't do. And I had no real reason for why the gospel was amazing beyond just you get to go to heaven one day and be saved from your sin, which is fantastic on its own, but it left me so powerless here. So that was the upbringing I had for 20 years until yeah, we got married. And I think Julia probably shared a lot of that story with you when you when she was on.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, she she said she went to this conference and then got home to you and was like, bruh. But um, so as as you're growing up, we'll get to that part. Yeah, as you're growing up, um, did you think, yeah, I I've got a pretty good handle on it, or or did you know, like, this is cool, but is this the whole thing?
SPEAKER_00I think I knew enough when I looked at the world that I was like, I don't want to be in there and I don't want to go and do all those things. But then when I went to university, the gospel was so powerless in my life, apart from like, I know I'm I know I'm going to heaven. Like that part wasn't gonna change. But uh when I got to university, I started drinking, started cussing, started sleeping around. Pornography was a big vice and all this other stuff because it was just about going to heaven one day. And so I would do something bad and feel awful about it. But my understanding was so solid of like, I know I'm going to heaven that when I do all this sin, because I'm a wretched sinner, then that's what I'm gonna just do. But I have grace and mercy to help me through it. That was 21 years of my life was like that.
SPEAKER_02Did anybody call you out on it? Like, were your buddies like, like, how outspoken were you out about like the importance of Christ being in your life? And then at the same time, you're making some questionable decisions.
SPEAKER_00Man, I had one guy, it was the most gut-wrenching moment as I was in grade 11, so my junior year, and we were playing Halo and in this guy's basement, we were just newly friends and he was newly saved. And I'd said something, I he said I swore, I don't think I did, but he turned to me and he goes, dude, he's like, You're the worst Christian that I know. Like, you're such a fake Christian, and that sucked. And I was like, I don't, I'm not trying to be, like, I don't want to be, and it hurt, but I didn't know again, I didn't know what to do other than I'm just gonna thank God for his grace and mercy and keep trying tomorrow. So yeah, that was that was like the one moment that I got called out my whole life.
SPEAKER_02Man, this reminds me of like when I was in college, I was seen like I was on the basketball team and what by my basketball team guys, I was the goody goody. Right. But then I would army crawl into their room like at two in the morning to find their porn that they had had hidden behind their normal DVDs. Well, my work. I would try to find that. And one time my buddy caught me and he just looked at me, he's like, Richard, what are you doing? And it's just like you're
Churched Upbringing And Secret Sin
SPEAKER_02like, uh, and then you just feel like a total fraud. Yeah, and how do you explain that? And then you're just so embarrassed, and you're just like, Oh, I I guess I'm really not about that life. I guess I'm not, I ain't nothing.
SPEAKER_00Right. Exactly. And I had a similar experience because I was I also played Bashuan College, and when I was there, it was the same thing. I was like our prayer captain. We had like a spiritual life captain, because I went to a like private Christian school. And uh yeah, it was the same thing. People would be like, okay, you're the our spiritual leader, but we see what you're doing, you're at all the parties with us and getting drunk with us, but you're a church Sunday morning. You know, that's we're one in the same basically.
SPEAKER_02So at what point were you like if this is like did you think like that was the Christian life? Like that you just do your best and then yeah, there's grace for me because like I'm sowing these wild oats now in college, and then this is what it's gonna be what life is gonna be like. Is that pretty much what you thought the whole thing?
SPEAKER_00I don't even think it was necessarily the wild oats, because I know that's a lot of young people's experience. I think mine was more just like I was at a Christian school with Christian friends who would get drunk, and some of them were like really like I thought these guys were like the real deal Christian, and because I grew up in like small town, 40,000 people. Now I'm in a bigger city, bigger exposure to people. So I just thought this is actually how Christians can live. And my parents have lied to me my whole life because my Christian friends, like my and my professors were like smoking cigars with students at the end of some of the classes and lectures, and then they would go out for drinks together at pubs. And I was like, okay, this is a part of the Christian life, is that we drink and we cuss and we do all this stuff. But but thank God for his grace and thank God for his election that I've been set apart and chosen to go to heaven. So I'll just go to church Sunday and repent and move on. But that was that was the reason. I just thought it was genuinely just a part of my human experience and my Christian experience was just this tension of I want to do right, but I can't.
SPEAKER_02So your parents have been holding out on you. They didn't tell you that the being a Christian, you could drink, smoke, and swear. Can't get tattoos either, and look at us now. Mercy. So, man, that must have been crazy confusing to see your professors.
SPEAKER_00Yeah. And it was it like the thing was I always I never turned my heart from God. Like, even in the midst of all the drinking and smoking, and or I never smoked, but like I had cigars and all this other stuff. My heart was never God, I don't like you or I'm mad at you. It was just, oh, this is a delightful addition to my walk with God. And and it, but it constantly like tore in my heart of like I wanted to just really do the right thing. And I always felt like I was doing a disservice, but at the same time, I was just serving these desires of I wanted to be a friend and I wanted to be the cool guy. And for the first time I had an opportunity to do both, and that really messed me up.
SPEAKER_02So when she didn't really go too deep into your your story, when did you guys link up? Was it in college? Did you guys go to the same school or what happened?
SPEAKER_00Yeah, so I was in college for three years, dropped out of university. I got a major concussion from playing basketball and was just Wow, what happened? Honestly, it had to be the Lord. Oh, I have game film and I have no footage of anything. I've never had a concussion in my life. And I walked off the floor and I said to my trainer, I said, I think I have a concussion. He said, Why? I said, I don't know. I just I feel funny. And sure enough, took me six months. I was in and out of like neurologist appointments and stuff, and just was like it was it like temple?
SPEAKER_02Like, did someone elbow you? What happened?
SPEAKER_00I I think I took a charge, and when I fell back, I think whatever I hit, whether I hit the ground or hit somebody, I don't know. I didn't black out, like nothing significant happened. It was just a peculiar moment in my life. But it made me reevaluate everything. I was in like the first two weeks, I was sleeping 18 hours a day. And so I would just wake up and eat and then go back to bed and just lay in the dark. And I was like, what am I doing with my life? Like I'm so unhappy. I don't like, I don't like what I'm doing. I don't like what I'm pursuing. I don't like any of this. What am I gonna do? And so I just prayed and I was like, God, what do you want for my life? And I'd always felt this calling to go to Bible school, to go to seminary. And I felt God prompted my heart that He said, I want you to go to Bible school. And I said, God, like I don't know that you know what's going on in my life. Like I am a mess, and you want me to go to Bible school? And he said, Yes. And I said, I can't. I'm and I will not. So I actually dropped out, moved home, became a plumber, did that for a year and a half. And when I moved home, it was when my parents began to really change. And they had someone in their church, uh, one of our elders, my dad was on our board, and this woman who was our secretary was talking to my parents, and she was like, Hey, like, how often do you guys read the Bible? And my parents were like, Hardly ever. Like, you know, it's on the back of the toilet, you know, with a daily bread. Like, that's the peak reading. And this woman got right in my parents' face and was like, How dare you? Like, you're supposed to be an elder at this church, you're supposed to be a leader in this church, and you don't even know what the Bible says. Well, my parents were like, Okay, you're right. Like, well, but what do we do? Because they were the same way, right? Like their hearts wanted to do right for God, but no one had ever talked to them about how to live for him. And so that began a journey of, okay, this woman said, start reading your Bible five minutes a day and start praying five minutes a day. And that's it. Everybody can do 10 minutes a day. And so that 10 minutes turned to 20, turned to 30, turned to an hour. But then they started to change and they started to talk different and live different and started to believe God for things. And so here I am watching this, being like, okay, this is peculiar. And then my dad goes, Hey, bud, I've been running from God for 20-something years, and uh, I need to go to Bible school because that's what God wants me to be, is in ministry. And I thought, oh no, I'm gonna have to go to school with my dad. And then my baby sister was like, guys, God set me free from anxiety and fear, and I'm gonna go to Bible school in the fall to be obedient to God. And I was like, oh no, I'm going to school with my dad and my baby sister. And so I did. I went to Bible school uh with my dad and little sister that September. So this is September 2017. Was there for a two-year program to get my bachelor's. What were you studying before? What were you gonna be before? Oh man, I was because I was running from God, I did five different programs in three years. So I started in history, wanted to be a history teacher, failed basically history 101, and then switched to Bible studies because I thought, you know, if I'm gonna be rebellious, I may as well be somewhat obedient. Then got it like a C minus in Bible 101. So switched to phys ed because I thought that's easy. Uh was ahead of my undergrad. So I You had to take A and P. I did double in uh psych and phys ed. And then the way that my progress had gone, my final year, if I had stayed, would have been eight electives out of 10. And so my guidance counselor was like, why don't you switch to kinesiology with a minor in psychology? And then you can play an extra year of basketball. So I was like, great. And so that those were my five programs. So I had the credit hours transferred to this new school, studying Bachelor's of Religious Education, and Julia was attending a Baptist church in town, and I was attending a Pentecostal school, and I had heard that God was doing things over at this Baptist church, and so I was like, I'm gonna go check it out because I was just so hungry for God. Like I'd never read my Bible my whole life. And you know, the first two weeks of Bible school, we had this class called spiritual integration. And our our professor was like, guys, I want you to just go all in and just commit yourself to God and see what he does. So I thought, okay, like what do I have to lose? And it was honestly the first time of my life that I can remember being like, man, I love the Bible and I love God and I'm gonna give my life for him and I'm gonna do everything that he says. And so I just started reading and and we started seeing God do things. We started seeing miracles happen. We saw a girl with scoliosis get healed, we saw a girl with a breast tumor get healed, both in our school. And it started to really challenge a lot of the things that I had believed my whole life. And uh ended up meeting Julia at the young adults group at this Baptist church, and it's also a crazy story. It's a long story, but long story short, um, we ended up on a phone call for three and a half hours talking about everything in life. The this like third conversation we ever had. And by the end of it, I hung up the phone and God spoke to me and he said, This is your wife. So we're on our first date, and this is not, we are not the example couple for all those people who are like, Man, God told me that you're my wife or you're my husband, because this is what happened. So we're on our first date, and as you're you know, you experienced with Julia, uh, she's very bold, very outspoken. And so we're in our date, and uh she goes, Hey, there's something you need to know about me. I was like, Okay, and she goes, I'm a really bold person. And I was like, sick, like what do you say to that? And she goes, and I think you're my husband. And I was like, Yep, I know. And so from there we uh started dating. We got engaged five months after that, got married on our one year anniversary of when we started dating, and uh, that was seven and a half years ago. So we've been enjoying marital bliss since then.
SPEAKER_02That's that's awesome. So you're in school this whole time, like you were in a two-year program.
SPEAKER_00Yeah. So 2017, I graduated the spring of 2019.
SPEAKER_02And you met her 2017 or 2018? Uh 2018, yeah. So you're married when you graduate.
SPEAKER_00What was the plan with life? I my first plan was I was so committed to God that I Googled, you know, what are the most unreached places, what are the hardest places
The Concussion That Rewired Priorities
SPEAKER_00to preach the gospel? And one of them was Turkey. So I thought, okay, I'm gonna go be a professional basketball player in Turkey and use basketball as my avenue into the country. And then I'm gonna be an evangelist and a missionary to Turkey. It was a top 10 persecuted country at the time. Then I ended up spraining my ankle, like four several ligaments, and was like, okay, maybe like still to this day. How tall are you? Six three.
SPEAKER_02Okay.
SPEAKER_00Yeah. Left ankle or right ankle? Left ankle for sure. Yeah. Same. That's a single leg jumper and the same ankle, time and time again. Um, so, anyways, yeah, I ended up being like, okay, God, I'll go wherever and I'll do whatever. And Julia was the same. Like, we'll go and do whatever. And then this youth pastoring job opened up at a pretty significantly sized church in Toronto area in a place called Whitby. And so felt the Lord say that that was going to be my job, and I got it. And um we so I graduated at the end of April. We got married two weeks after that. Two weeks after that, I started this job, and so our whole life had changed from being students and engaged to now living together and being married, well, now being youth and young adults pastor at this big church.
SPEAKER_02And she tells us that like this is the time where she went like right after she got married, she went over to this conference where she starts learning. I forget what was the the first thing that she was.
SPEAKER_00Jesus Conference. Yeah, that's what it was called. But it was all about Jesus Conference. The Jesus Conference. It was all about um how to share the gospel and what the gospel is, and it was like eight days of just here it is, every single day, just going through this is what it is, this is how you share it. And so that was that was where it began.
SPEAKER_02So she comes back to you. What's the first thing that she said that you were like, Wait, hold up, bro?
SPEAKER_00Dude, I don't even remember that it was like a three-hour download of eight days of stuff at once, and she's like, I learned this and this, and did you know? And did you know? And I was like, uh, I'm sitting there like that because because I when I was in Bible school, we were forced to read the Bible and you know in the right ways, but as I was reading it, I'd never read the gospels. So here I am reading what Jesus is saying, and he's saying to these people, like, go and sin no more, or go and be holy, or go and be perfect as your father in heaven is perfect. So I'm like, okay, I want to do that because that's what Jesus said. But then my professors and people around me were like, dude, you know, that's not the human experience. You know, we're all wretched sinners, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And at that time, everybody I could find online was saying the same thing. So I was like, okay, I'm I am a wretched sinner, but I'm supposed to live holy, but I can't. So when Julia came back, I was like, okay, this makes sense. But I didn't really know these people that she had learned this from very well. So I said to her, This is either the greatest message I've ever heard, or this is heresy and we need to be careful. Um, and so I said, I'm gonna commit to studying the Bible on this. And I said, I'm gonna try and prove you wrong. And and the only reason I did that was because I just believed that we can look through things with a lens of like, I'm gonna search for things that don't exist when we study the Bible to try and prove ourselves right. Sure. But if we're doing it more critically, I felt it like more neutral of like, is this what it says, or is this not what it says? And it took me eight months to go from Acts through to Revelation. And I was looking at, you know, what does it say in the original Greek? I like a Greek study Bible there with me, and I was looking at every word and and you know, the phrasing of it, the context of all of these things, and and I came away being like, oh boy. Like I remember just sitting there at the end of it crying and being like, man, the gospel is so powerful and so transformative, and we've watered it down so deeply, and it's so empowering. And so that was a really exciting discovery for me.
SPEAKER_02Give me an example of one of the main aspects that you were like, This is different than I thought. Like the whole sinner thing, or yeah, give me an example.
SPEAKER_00Oh, dude, that 100%. That was one of them. The other one was. Is that your book there? Yeah, this is my book. So I wrote this book. It's called Poor Week Old Sinner. It now has a question mark here because I don't want people to think I'm making a statement that you're a poor week old sinner. And and this book actually came from all the studying of that. You know, one of the one of the first ones where I was like, oh, that's interesting, is in Peter. I think it's one Peter uh one verse two, and it says that we were sprinkled with his blood. And the sprinkling of blood was always talking about taking an unholy vessel, sprinkling it with blood to make it holy and useful for good service in the temple and in the tent, like the tent of meeting. And so that was the first time where I was like, okay, this is not just a spiritual concept. Of a spiritual rebirth, but it's actually he's so transformed me that now I'm a holy vessel, and this body isn't a wretched thing because it I've joined with Christ in his death, and now I've been sprinkled, and the things that were unholy have now been made holy.
SPEAKER_02Yeah. No, that's amazing. So that's one of the first things that you're like, this is this is like the opposite of what I've learned.
SPEAKER_00Yeah. And Romans, right? Romans 6 was a big one because it talked about baptism. And you know, baptism, I got baptized like four times. I got baptized when I was five, baptized after, you know, before I went to Bible school. I got because I thought that'll get me right and stop me from watching porn. And then I was like, I'll get baptized in Bible school because all the stuff that I was still stuck in, maybe that'll help me stop watching porn. And none of that helped. And then when I finally got set free, I was like, I'm gonna get baptized for real. So I got baptized again. And then I went to Israel and did a tour. So I've been baptized, I don't know, six times now. Any of them take? Did any of them did you die with hopefully, hopefully, yeah. The Jordan River seemed uh, you know, most significant.
SPEAKER_02So when you're reading Romans 6, like I was telling Julia that I had never read Romans 6. Right. And then when a buddy introduced me to Romans 6 and he's just like, sin doesn't have any power over you, and I was like, come again? What are you talking about? Like, look at my life. It's like, well, no, like you don't know this stuff, that's why it still seems to have power. Right. And that blew me away, like, oh, maybe I don't know this stuff. Maybe that's why I'm struggling. Right. When you first saw, like, so you should also consider yourself dead to sin and alive to God. Right. Was this like how how big of an impact did that have on you as you were walking through this? It it felt hard to believe, right?
SPEAKER_00Because I'm now at my age, I was what, 23, I think, when that happened. And I was like, man, this this challenges everything I know, but I've never like there's been things doctrinally that I'm like, okay, this challenges me, but but does it sit right? And how does it make me feel? And how does it change my life as a believer? But this was like, man, it feels really good knowing that I've joined with him in his death, that I can now live a life pleasing to God, and I can live a life worthy of the calling that I've been given. And I think that's in Ephesians. And it was like, it was so liberating that I was like, man, this, I gotta get this in my soul. And then we started listening to a guy named Dan Moeller, and Dan articulates it with such um excellence that it's like, man, you're just getting blasted listening to this guy. But he gets it, and then the testimonies that come from it.
SPEAKER_02And I think somebody messaged me this week and they asked me if Julia had ever heard of Dan Moeller. They're like, has she heard of Dan Moeller? Because she's got that same kind of energy. And I was like, I actually don't know. Um he's a hero of ours for sure.
SPEAKER_00Yeah. Have you ever met him? Yeah, we met him once. He spoke at a church. Uh we have a church in Florida that we attend, and he was speaking at a conference there. And so the pastor friend of ours was able to hook us up. And so we had an afternoon, spent some time with him, and just it was so nice just to say thank you. Of just like, you're the first person that that ever testified to what I we were believing and was living it. And so it was fun just to say thank you to him for all of that.
SPEAKER_02I I met him and I talked to him for like three minutes after he walked off the stage, and I like bum rushed him, and I was like, I just want to say thank you. Like you receiving Jesus in that warehouse changed my life. And he just looked at me, and I I've told this story before. It's like Jesus was looking at me in the same way. I'm not calling him Jesus, like his eyes, like he was just locked in on me. Like he wasn't. There's a bunch of people in this auditorium, and he didn't give a flip about any of them. He was just like, and he was like, but it was worth it, brother. Yeah, yeah. And I was just like, man, and I was just talking with somebody just a few hours ago at lunch about um people that have influenced me. And I was like, uh, yeah, number one's got to be Dan Mueller. He's been the biggest, one of the biggest influences of my life. Uh so that's awesome. So you start listening to Dan, and he's just preaching it with like some joy. Like, uh what would you say? Yeah.
SPEAKER_00To me, uh at that time, the same thing that was happening. So this is unfolding, and I'm studying and I'm learning. And at the same time, I'm a brand new pastor, right? So I'm 23 years old, I'm submitting to my leadership, and my leaders are listening to like John Piper and John MacArthur and Justin Peters and all these guys who are saying very counter things to the very things that I was believing and what I was discovering. And I didn't want to be that kid who was like young and new in ministry and being like, I know more than you, and I know this better because I really didn't know it better. And it got to the point where I would just, I sat in my office crying and I said, Man, I don't know. I don't know what I believe anymore because I I'm so confused. These guys are saying this is the devil, these guys are saying this is God, these guys are saying this, these guys are saying this. I don't know who to believe. And I just prayed and I said, God, you're gonna have to help me. And what I really felt was that um, okay, this is what I felt. What did the scripture say? What does Jesus say about who to follow and what to believe? Well, Jesus says two things. He said, They'll know that you're my disciples by the love that you have for one another, and you'll they'll know you're my disciples by the fruit of your life. So I what I took from that was okay, based on the people that I'm listening to, how well do they love others? Right. So not just in off the stage, but how well do they love people in the way that they talk about them? How well do they honor? How well do they speak? All those things. And then the second part was the fruit of their life. Okay, if it's a testimony or like what Dan does, right? Constantly sharing stories, okay, that's fruit. But then it's like these guys that get up and they're like, Today
Eight Months In Scripture And Freedom
SPEAKER_00we're gonna talk about the joy of the Lord and how it is your strength. And you're like, brother, like please have some joy, have an experience with God, please. Yeah. Um, and so that became my gauge. So for three years, I exclusively listened to Dan Moeller, a guy named Smith Wigglesworth, and another guy named Michael Kulianos. And that was it. I didn't listen to anybody else because I knew these guys were safe voices to help me grow in this. So during the Smith Wigglesworth, that guy's like super like is he on YouTube? Like he's super old, right? Uh no, it's it's all through his books. Um, he died in the 1940s, yeah. Yeah, that's what I was gonna say.
SPEAKER_02I'm like, they they got they got a YouTube of Smith.
SPEAKER_00No, I wish they don't have any recordings of his voice, just uh one video. Wow. So Smith, and who's the other guy? Uh Michael Kleinus is a pastor in Florida at a church called Jesus Image, and we had first experienced him through uh Todd White, because he Todd was speaking at one of Michael's conferences. And listening to Michael, Michael's core focus is Jesus, right? So every message is Jesus. It's you know, Jesus is the healer, Jesus is the baptizer in the Holy Ghost, Jesus is savior, Jesus is and it's it just was so consistently Christ is the great I am, and that's where we're gonna stay, and that's where we're gonna keep our eyes. So for me, it really helped being like, okay, when I don't know where to look, Jesus is always a good start. Hmm.
SPEAKER_02Yeah. So for three years you were just locked in with these guys as the main voices that were speaking into your life. That was it. Yep. How'd that go?
SPEAKER_00Honestly, it was probably the best thing I've ever done because um, you know, the scripture says that we're not supposed to be swayed by every win in doctrine. And I think right now in the day and age of social media, and especially when you're young and passionate, you're just gonna be like, who's the next person? I gotta listen, and you're just consuming so much. And sometimes those things end up actually creating a division in our heart. They don't end up producing life, and they actually end up like there was even a girl that I was walking with in discipline that she was like passionate for the Lord, wanted to give her life for Jesus and do missions and all this stuff, and then got caught into like critiquing the church and was like, This is all fake, this is all made up. Like, I believe the Bible, I don't believe any of this. And I was like, What happened to you? And just but the love of God had emptied, like had just been so gone from her life that you could see it, and it was a reflection of just like I'd rather be critical and and almost borderline rude than actually talk with the lens of Christ and the lens of the love of God. And and so for me, what it really helped was hone in on what do I believe? Is it biblical? And okay, now I know how to defend it. Now I know that what I'm believing, like I won't preach on things I'm not convinced of. Because you know, the scripture talks about how as teachers and as people who have platforms that we're gonna be held to a higher standard, and that's that's intimidating for me of like, I don't want to lead people astray. So if this is the gospel, I want to know is this exactly what it's saying? Because I don't want to stand before the Lord and be like, God, I tried, but I I gave people the wrong gospel, like I'm sorry. And and so to me, it's I'm utterly convinced that the gospel message is life transformation from darkness to life, from death to being born again, like everything inside of you has changed and been totally redeemed and brand new.
SPEAKER_02Man, yeah, I I would I always tell people that if you don't think that the gospel is the most beautiful and life-transforming message that you have ever heard, well then don't worry. You haven't heard it yet. Yeah. And if you do think it's that, it's still probably better than you than you think. Right. And so, like, I remember someone was like, is everybody supposed to act like you like when they hear the gospel? Is that what everybody is supposed to act like? Right. And I thought about it for a second and I said, no, they're just supposed to act like the most excited version of themselves. Yeah. Like not the most like my most excited version, like I'm extra. They're not supposed to act like me, but whatever is the most for them, like that. Yeah. And I don't think I they were satisfied with my answer because they wanted to, they they were like, I already know this. And I'm like, well, if you knew this, then you would be just as psyched as I am. And um, yeah, because it it doesn't get less good. Like we're we're learning, we're growing in it, we're maturing in it. Um it's maybe it's not a surprise as it was like you know, when you first got married and you're hearing, oh, this it's not a surprise, but it's still just as good and and life transforming.
SPEAKER_00A hundred percent. There's so many times I'll just like sit with the Lord and just like look on my wall. I have a bunch of scriptures just like handwritten. And um I just like sit there and I'll just start crying and be like, man, what he did, what Jesus endured. Like, I I I never want to lose that wonder and I never want to lose that awe, and just like it, it was so fantastic. Like, I know who I was, but now I know who I am, and thank God that he transformed me.
SPEAKER_02Man, that's powerful. Yeah, I I think about how I know that somebody preached uh the bomb sermon, and this is this is how I think about it. And it might not be everybody, but if somebody preaches a sermon and this thought comes into my mind, I know it was the bomb, I need to get alone with him. Like I need to be in the secret place. Yeah, and that's when I listen to Dan, I think to myself, oh, this brother's been alone with him. Like he doesn't have something more than I do, he's just been alone with him more than I have. Right. And I need to get alone with him because what he was like, what he's saying, like it's from a deep, intimate knowledge of God because he knows God, not because he just read a bunch of stuff about him. Right. And so anytime, like it's it's not about how crazy they say it, it's like they know God. Yeah, and I was just listening to somebody who knows God because they're spending that time. And so, yeah, I think early on for me, I was so impressed that I just started spending that time. And anytime, like, and I've gone and I've done ministry where I haven't been spending that time, and I've gone and done ministry when I have, and it and it's way better when you've just been alone with him.
SPEAKER_00There was a verse, um this is a different version, um, but it's uh Colossians chapter four, and it says, devote yourself to prayer. And when I read that, so we were already married, I was already youth pastoring, so this would be like 2020. And I remember reading that, being like, I've never I've never heard that before. Like all I've ever, you know, growing up, it was like pray without ceasing or pray in the spirit on all occasions, but it didn't make any sense. I was like, how does one pray while talking? How does one pray while sleeping? Like, how am I supposed to pray all the time? But devotion, I could understand, as you would with sports, right? Like that's so God said, Jacob, what did it, what was it like when you devoted yourself to basketball? I was like, Well, that's easy. When's practice? When do I eat? When do I work out? That's it. And he said, Jacob, what if you live that way for me? I thought, well, that's a great idea. Like, okay, how does how do I do that? So I looked in the Bible and Jesus went away. He withdrew himself to a secret place. And so that year, I ended up building, I bought an old trailer, an old four by eight utility trailer, and built a shed on it. And so it has wheels, and we've towed it around every house, but it's my prayer shed. And it's insulated for the winters, and the summer's got a little air conditioner, and it's just carpet and walls, no windows, a rickety old door. But that's been for my what last six years, my hiding place has been a box. I'm jealous, bro.
SPEAKER_02Now I want to buy an old thing that just it stays warm in there. You're in Canada, dog. Like it's do you do you get cold in there?
SPEAKER_00No, I get a little space heater, and it's not, I mean, it's not that big of a space, right? So um, yeah, it's perfect. Man.
SPEAKER_02So you're you're doing this thing for three years, and you are you still at the same church that you had started out with, or or did you move on?
SPEAKER_00So after after two years, we ended up leaving, and uh, we left because um we had actually spent 30 days fasting and praying. There were some leadership conflicts that we had had, and one of our mentors was like, if you guys carry on the path that you're going on, you're actually going to cause division, and that's worse than anything else. Is this because of what you were preaching? Yeah, and just like um we aired more on the side of like let's do evangelism and get people out on the streets and do stuff where we actually go, and just the culture was more of a hey, bring people in, like a seeker-friendly, kind of seeker-aware gathering. And we were more on the let's have an experience with God because He's changed our life, and everybody needs to experience this. And so in fasting and praying, it was just okay, seek first my kingdom and my righteousness and all to be added. So we said, Lord, for 30 days, we're just gonna seek you, and whatever comes from that, we'll know. We'll know what answer if we seek you. And so during that time, I had a bunch of dreams and visions, really for the first time at that degree. Like it was like every night I was having a dream, and I had dreams about like uh traveling around Canada and getting into airplanes, and then I saw a map of Canada wash over with the blood of Jesus, and then I had this vision where I saw a stadium in Toronto where the Toronto Raptors play, filled with thousands of young people, and then they were all leaving to go out and minister to people in Toronto on the streets and all these like very specific things. So I thought, okay, I'm gonna resign in faith and do that. How do I how do you do that? You know, just there's no job description for that, and there's no assignment. That's just here it is. It so it was just okay, let's go figure it out. So quit in faith, ended up staying on staff till May because we had two other staffers who were pregnant, and so I just I felt to honor the commitment of just let me finish the semester. And then ended up meeting this guy named Bill Prankard. He's a 70, he was 76 at the time, he's 81 now, an evangelist who got touched by Catherine Coleman back in the 1970s, and God changed his life. And he had who's Catherine Coleman? Catherine Coleman was a healing evangelist that got really big in the 1960s and 70s, and one of the things that marked her more than anyone else was the presence of God would come into her meetings, and it was just like the
Choosing Voices By Love And Fruit
SPEAKER_00the one thing that people talked about, they had an experience where they got healed or touched or whatever, but it was the presence of God that just showed up. And so a lot of people were saying this was the devil, and Bill was like, Well, I'm gonna go find out. So he goes and God touched him and spoke to him and said, You've had a form of godliness and denied my power. And just like me, where he was like, God, I wanna honor you. Like, I don't want to be that. He went home and just started praying. And on the bus ride home from Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, they had the school bus with a bunch of sick people. None of them got healed in Catherine's meeting, but every single one of them got healed on the way home to Ottawa, our nation's capital. It's about a 10-hour bus ride. And that just broke out. Healings just happened. They weren't touching anybody, they weren't praying for people. He would just get up, talk about Jesus, and people got healed. And so that's what started in the 1970s, this thing. So 1972, he goes to pray and it's like, God, what do I do with this? Like, this is just happening. Like, I'm not trying to make this happen. And he had the same vision that I had in 1972. He saw Canada Revival, stadium events filled with young people, a thousand young people on the streets of our nation's capital, Ottawa, where they were ministering to the rich and the poor and the sick. And it was like, okay. So I sat in a service and God just brought our hearts together. And so for the last five years, uh, five and a half years, I've been with him traveling. And he was the fourth voice that I started listening to out of that group. So it was Dan, Michael, Smith, and now Bill. And so I had been traveling with him. And at the end of 2024, he passed the baton of leadership to me. So I'm now leading his ministry. And so we do evangelistic work all across Canada, and our mission field is Canada's Arctic, you know, the coldest places in our country. And yeah, a big part of what we carry is this the gospel, the freedom from sin, the freedom to live the way that Christ intended.
SPEAKER_02Man. That's incredible.
SPEAKER_01Yeah.
SPEAKER_02And is there is there a large healing component in this ministry, or what what are the main components?
SPEAKER_00Yeah, so I'm very passionate about the baptism of the Holy Spirit because that's one of the other things that changed my life. It was it was the revelation of the gospel and the baptism of the Holy Spirit, right? In Acts chapter two, it was it was different than the indwelling presence of the Holy Spirit from you know upon salvation, but the baptism was there to be a powerful witness, as Jesus said that you would receive power to be my witnesses. And so that changed my life. So I got baptized in the Holy Ghost my first year in Bible school. And just same thing, just asked him, right? That's what the Bible says. Ask him and he'll give it to you. And then that's when we started seeing God do crazy things. We started doing deliverance, we started seeing miracles happen. And it was just something that it's like, if just like the gospel, if this is possible for me, then I want to see it. And then John Jesus said that anyone who believes would do the things that he's done in greater. And so in studying that and learning, okay, is this for us? Is this for you know, whatever? Jesus very clearly says, anyone who believes that calls on my name shall do these things. And I thought, okay, I haven't seen it yet, but I want to see more, and I want to see more. And then that's just been the last several years, it's just been seeing more and more and more of that.
SPEAKER_02Incredible. So, how did you find like you said that when you were younger and in college you struggled with um lust? How did that, like the gospel, end up changing the way you thought about that?
SPEAKER_00Yeah, well, I mean, for the first time, I was actually told that I could live free. And, you know, before that, it was just like, okay, try not to sin. Let's kind of almost medicate you of either, you know, let's just put a blocker on your phone or you know, whatever. And there was never actually a real power of you can live free from this and you're not bound to it anymore. And this isn't your identity, this isn't who you are, and you can overcome this because no man has been given more than what the Spirit of God can't help him overcome. And so it's like, okay. So that was the first thing of just this revelation of wow, I can actually live right for God. The second thing was this really um powerful actually experience that I had when I was youth pastoring with this thing called Plan to Protect. I don't know what you guys have in the States, but it's like a program that helps it's for churches that helps create safe environments. So it's like training on safety working with kids and vulnerable people and all that stuff. Part of that training is really great. It's, you know, don't be alone with a minor, don't be alone with a member of the opposite sex if you're married and I mean, really ever, and all these good things. But then in it is this like undertone of if you're a man, you're a monster because all you can think about is sex and all that ever drives you is sex. And if you do it, like I that's how I walked away from this training that's supposed to help me as a youth pastor. I was like, man, I don't, I'm I'm just a monster. Like, I just I'm I just can't talk to girls, I can't talk to anybody. And it actually put this big thing in my heart of just like anytime I even look at a girl, not even with lust in my eyes. If I just look at her, I'm already a monster and I've already thought bad things because that's how messed up the world made me think I was. So then I end up with this girl. It was after service. We had given an altar call. This girl had responded. I don't know what she'd responded for. In front of the whole gathering of like 50 or 60 people, she's on the ground and I'm doing all the right things, right? You pray, you put your hand on your shoulder, stand beside her. You know, we're not close. And I just felt God say, I want you to kneel and pray for her. So as I kneel in front of her to go pray, she throws herself on me. She's 16, throws herself on me and just starts to weep. And I don't know why to this day, I don't know what was going on. And the first thought I had was, This is so wrong. I'm such a monster. I have to go find my wife. And God spoke to me, He said, Don't Don't you dare move. He said, I'm doing something through you that's going to change her life forever. But do not move from this place. And that was a big part of this revelation that came from the gospel was okay, I can be free, but now I'm also not a monster by being the man that God's called me to be. And that that was never the language that people had taught, right? It's like, so I can live free, but I actually can live in a way where I can minister to girls and I can talk to women. Like, you know, all of my best friends, I have a great relationship with their partners, like with their wives, because I have that thought of like I'm not a monster, and I can sit alone having coffee with my friend's wife. Well, my wife and and her and you know, the my friend are talking together. I can talk one-on-one. And it was so liberating because it was like, Jesus, thank you that the gospel has changed me. And thank you, God, that you showed this to me that I'm not a monster when I try and talk with people, just talking to people, I'm not a bad person. So, yeah, those are kind of the two big things for me.
SPEAKER_02Man, that's powerful. Um, as you've been doing this thing, and as you're, you know, we're in the middle of 2026, what is God impressing on you? What what what is what is it that you're learning that has been um changing your perspective?
SPEAKER_00Man, I I woke up three days in a row with this verse in my heart from Hebrews chapter 11. I want to read it. Let's pull it up. And uh it's been one of those things that really, you know, I've read it before, but it was so good. And it's talking about all the heroes of our faith, right? By faith, Enoch was taken away so that he did not see death and then and was not found because God had taken him. But without faith, it's impossible to please God, right? Which I'd read. And I thought, okay, for he who comes to God must believe that he is. And then this is the part that really got to me, and that he is a rewarder of those who diligently seek him. And I just woke up three days in a row with that verse. He is a rewarder of those who diligently seek him, of those who diligently seek him. And I just like Julie and I talk about this thing that's called an audit, right? Where we look at our lives and it's like, okay, are we doing, you know, are we doing what God's asked us to do? Are we living, you know, rightly? Are we, you know, just are we prioritizing the right things? So we call it an audit. And that was one of those things of like, okay, I've been, I've been seeking the Lord, but have I been diligent in it? Right. Like diligence to me goes beyond just like, yeah, I love God and I believe him and you know, I read my Bible, but it's like, I want to know him, right? Like Paul says that in Philippians, oh, that I might know him. It's just this like desperate thing. And Paul's at the end of his life, and it's like, man, that's that's the thing that I feel in my heart. It's like, man, I want to know him. Like, I want to be like that. You know, when you encounter, you know, the way that you encounter Dan Moeller is like, that's the way that I want people to experience when they meet me, is like, man, this guy's been with God, and I can tell, I can see it in his eyes, and and he knows who he is. And and I just, you know, I want to know him, and that's really been on my heart. And then also just for Canada, I I, you know, we have a nationwide ministry and a nationwide platform, and I've really felt this thing, you know. Um, one of the revivals that happened historically was called the Welsh Revival, and it happened in um where did it happen? I don't know, somewhere in England, I think Northern Ireland. Anyways, oh Wales, that's where it is, the Welsh Revival. That makes sense, right? Um, anyways, and out of that, the guy who led it, Evan Roberts, they led over a hundred thousand people to the Lord in three months, and all over Wales, like things were entirely changed, like bars had closed, prisons were emptied because people had been so changed. And out of it, he said, revival begins when the people of God get on their face and pray, but it breaks out when they get in when they step in obedience to what God's asked them to do. And right now, when I look at our country, I I see a church that doesn't pray, right? Statistically, church meetings are are
Prayer, Revival In Canada, Final Charge
SPEAKER_00wildly unattended. We had a church of attendance about 1,400 people, and we had 12 people show up to the prayer meetings, you know, once a month. And that's the consistent thing is that people don't pray. The second thing is is you know the heart of reaching the lost. And in Canada, you know, it's less than 10% of churches prioritize it. And out of that, 90% of people don't share the gospel on a regular basis. So Canada's going to hell, America's going to hell, and we just seem to be okay watching it go to hell instead of making some changes. So um, yeah, I I feel personally like we're gonna be traveling around the nation in the next few months, spending time in churches from east to west and everywhere in between, just with that heart of like, hey, there's uh there's actually an answer to all these problems. It's not politics, it's not a governing body, it's the gospel. The gospel works, the gospel saves, the gospel redeems, and we need to pray. And we need to really believe God to do some big things in Canada, especially.
SPEAKER_02I was listening to somebody today and they were talking about how the gospel isn't like this appetizer, so then we can get to some like main course, like, oh, we need to start you off with this so that we can get to the deeper stuff. Right. Like the gospel is it. And the further we go, we're gonna go further into it and understand it more and live it out more. But like it is the appetizer, it's the main course, it's the dessert, it's all of it. And uh in my background, we think that that that's milk, that everybody understands the gospel, but we need to understand prophecy or we need to understand like something, and as I'm thinking more and more, I'm like, no man, like this is what we gotta be living and dying on. This is it right here.
SPEAKER_00100%. Because to me, it's the same, right? Like, I think everything, everything else comes from the place of the gospel, right? So it's like healing comes from the gospel, the prophetic comes from the gospel, that you know, evangelism comes out of the gospel, that if you believe it, then you're gonna everything through that lens filters through. How does the prophetic function? How does the evangelist function? And and so I agree with you on that. Yeah.
SPEAKER_02Uh, I usually ask this question at the end here. If you could go back to this kid, let's say that's uh he just he's starting to his concussion is starting to clear up, and you could put your arm around him and encourage him, and he doesn't know what he's supposed to do, he doesn't want to go to school with his dad. Uh, how would you encourage this guy? What would you say to him uh with what you know now?
SPEAKER_00One of the biggest things that Julie and I have done for the last several years is take some really big steps of faith and of decision making. And every single time we've seen the Lord provide and come through. Like we just adopted a baby. Uh, you know, we have a 14-month-old baby girl, and we're adopting a second child in September where we got asked to adopt a newborn baby. And, you know, part of that came from the scripture that talks about to take care of the widows and orphans. But, you know, little Jacob looking back at that would be like, man, that's nuts. Like, how would you ever do that? I'd have to figure out the logistics of it. I'd have to figure out how to become a dad. I'd have to study it, I have to get ready. And if I could go back and just say something, it's just trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your understanding. If he says to do it, do it and don't ask questions. And to me, I think that would have encouraged me because I think I had to figure everything out. But the older I'm getting and the more I spend time with him, the less I need to figure it out, and the more I just need to say, okay, God, I'll do what you say. Whatever it is, yeah, I'm a yes.
SPEAKER_02I love it. Jacob, man, it's been a pleasure. Uh, I'm loving to see what you and your wife are up to and how you're impacting people for the gospel. And yet you're just a blessing, and I just see um more. Like sometimes we think, well, what's gonna happen next? And the answer is more of the same. More preaching of the gospel, more lives being transformed. And I definitely see that with you and your ministry. So blessings to you, man. Thank you so much for coming on and uh sharing your story with us.
SPEAKER_00Hey, man, thank you, and thanks for for doing this, and thanks for preaching the gospel, for being bold and for for putting your neck out there to just be you know a stand for what's right and what's true. And we need more of that today. So thank you, my friend. Absolutely.