Christmas can be a very special time, but it can also be a very stressful time. And given everything that has been going on this year, who knows what will unfold this holiday season? What if, for once, we just relaxed and gave ourselves permission to focus on what really matters. Welcome to the Calm Christmas podcast with me Beth Kempton, just like my book of the same name. I hope the Calm Christmas podcast inspires connection, belonging, self care, nourishment, and joy, and a little bit of festive magic. Hello, and welcome to Episode Five, Winter Words to Soothe the Soul. Today's episode is all about words, our own words and those written by other people. Words can be medicine, I really believe that whether we write them ourselves in a journal, whether we read some beautiful poetry, pen a thoughtful note to a friend, or escape a difficult day reading a wonderful book. Today I want to share some wintery words from some of my favourite writers, because words can help us inhabit the season or escape it depending on what we need. I also have a little writing exercise for you at the end, in case you fancy it and an invitation to join my brand new Winter Writing Sanctuary for free. More on that later. To begin, I'd like to share some words from my favourite language other than my native English, the Japanese expression, ichiyo ochite tenka no aki o shiru(), tells us that with the fall of a single leaf, we know that Autumn is here. As a seasonal reference, I'm probably a little bit late in the year to be using it. But as a proverb, it feels like it is perfect, because it's used in the context of recognising imminent change. Right now we're experiencing the arrival of winter. And I know many of us can sense a bigger change The Japanese see the seasons as signposts, visible reminders of coming. our own natural rhythms. In modern life, these often get disrupted as we extend our days with strong artificial light, as we interrupt our sensitive bio rhythms with blue lights from our electronic devices. And as we push ourselves to be highly productive, just because it's another weekday, you know how it is, we push on regardless of whether our bodies are trying to tell us it's time to hibernate, or to get outside for some sunshine. And then we wonder why we get sick. The seasons are a regular reminder that we don't need to push all the time. Every push needs a pull. Every expansion needs a contraction. Every effort needs a rest. There are times for creating and times for seeking inspiration, times for noise and times for silence. times to focus and times to dream. Ebb and flow wax and wane. With today's episode I invite you to consider that words can help you to tune into your natural rhythm in this season of your life in this season of the year, in this moment of your day, and I hope you enjoy some of the readings that I'm going to be sharing today. I have loved books for as long as I remember. When I was in primary school, my best friend used to come to my house and stay overnight. Not for a sleepover. But for a readover. We'd stay up all night reading I remember one night we had a midnight feast of Punch & Judy strawberry toothpaste. Yuck! Anyway, many of my childhood memories involve words, making newspapers, storytime curled up in a soft armchair, typing play scripts on my dad's old typewriter with that blue paper in between the sheets of white to make multiple copies and Tippex on a paper strip to cover up mistakes. The first thing I ever had published was a poem about a tramp in a school magazine age 12. And I have shoeboxes filled with letters received from pen pals and from friends when I was living abroad. I've always found words to be a place of solace, just like the bookshops and libraries that house them. And I love giving books as gifts. I wonder what memories you have words playing an important part in your life. And in particular in winter, or Christmas perhaps? These days when the world seems just a little too much I want to lift my spirits I often turn to words. I love a good easy read Christmas novel. I love food writing. I love travel writing, sharing stores, stories from faraway lands. I love factual books about what's going on in nature at this time of year. And I love poetry and beautiful prose which captures the season in a special way. I also tend to start writing my own books in the winter too. There's just something about the rain battering the windows, a cosy fire or warm jumper and fingerless gloves on my hands, a nice cup of tea, and your notebook. There are so many ways to use words to connect with the season of winter. If you want to explore these yourself, do come and join my free Winter Writing Sanctuary, which begins on Monday, the 23rd of November. It's a two week writing class open to all levels. And you can find inspiration and community alongside writers from all over the world. It's completely free. And you can sign up and dowhatyouloveforlife.com. I hope you'll join us. But for now, here are some snippets of winter words from a variety of seasonal books. You can just listen and enjoy them. Or you can allow each one to spark something in you, perhaps pausing after each piece to write something of your own is a wonderful way to kickstart something in your own brain by listening to a piece of someone else's writing. And then just writing something yourself. It might be connected, it might be inspired by it. It might be completely tangential. But have a go and see where you get to. Some of these snippets I'm sharing are dreamy, some might elicit memories, some are reminders that if we're having a hard time, we aren't the only one and that can be a comfort. I'm curious to see what resonates with you right now do feel free to come and share with me on Instagram @BethKempton. I hope these short passages inspire you to seek out some winter words among your own books. So firstly, I want to look at books that help us look at the rhythm of the year things like almanacs and gardening guides. I have some wonderful Royal Horticultural Society gardening guides and encyclopaedias I'd love to dip into when I'm in the kitchen with a cup of tea. And the piece I want to share with you is from Lia Leendertz's, annual Almanac. It's called The Almanac and this one is actually from the 2018 edition, but a new one comes out every year and the 2021 edition is out now. And this is Lia talking a bit about November. She says,"November is the month in which we fight the encroaching dark
with light:Guy Fawkes Night, Samhain (pronunced Sa-oon), Diwali, all November festivals centred around light, sparks and fire. A drift of wood smoke and the occasional tang of sulphur is the scent of November. All of these festivals have a secondary focus on sweet treats Bonfire Night parkin, cinder toffee and toffee apples; soul cakes at Samhain, Diwali sweets as if our ancestors knew that the fire battles were all very well, but the true way to make it through winter is by comfort eating " She goes on to say "It can also be a beautiful month, as the fiery final trees flame with colour in the pale sunlight, or it can be as bare as January if a big storm has blown all the last leaves away. After the storm we see the stems for the
first time:purples, oranges, yellows and whites. Old mans beard seed heads open now to reveal the fluffy insides that give them their name, and caught by low winter sunlight they look like strings of fairy lights hung out across the nearby bare hedgerows. It is a month for finding warmth, and light, wherever you can find it." And of course there is food writing. Some of my favourite food writers include Diana Henry, Felicity Cloake, Gill Meller, Nigel Slater, there are many. These are all British, I really encourage you to seek out food writers in your country who are really in touch with local produce and seasonality and can really help you bring the idea of food to life. Today I want to share a snippet from Nigel Slater's The Kitchen Diaries III. This is his entry for December the 19th."A change of heart I didnt think I liked bread sauce. It turns out I simply hadnt had a good one. And by good, I mean one made with creamy milk in which bay leaves and whole peppercorns have been left to infuse. Where a few whole cloves have been floated on the surface of the milk as it shimmers towards the boil; and where an onion or shallot has been introduced as a backbone to the aromatics. What I had considered bread sauce was in reality little more than bread and milk. I can think of few accompaniments that rely so heavily on their seasoning. Getting the balance of aromatics right is essential. In the right quantity, cloves give off a spicy floral note, as garden pinks do when caught on a warm breeze. In quantity, though, they will set your teeth on edge. You will need at least a couple bay leaves, but any more than four and a bitter note can intrude. Black peppercorns, much gentler than the white ones, are crucial, as, I think, is the inclusion of shallot or onion." He goes on to say "After much crumbling of bread, infusing of milk and grating of apples, we end up with a blissful bowl of sauce that brings with it the scents of warm bread and mulled cider. It has so many of the qualities of porridge, risotto, wet polenta, dal. The moment when the pool of warm, bay-infused bread sauce on our plates merged with the roasting juices from the pheasant was the best Christmas gift of all. I just wish it hadnt taken me so long to discover I like bread sauce." If you're using these pieces as a prompt for your own writing, it's a really wonderful thing to do to go and find a recipe that you love. Or write down a recipe that you know by heart and turn it into a piece of writing. So you're not just talking about how to make something, but what you think of as you're making it or what's important in the recipe, just how Nigel did in that lovely piece when talking about something as simple as bread sauce. Have a go and see what you come up with. And then of course, at this time of year, there are some wonderful old-fashioned books, nostalgic books, books like A Christmas Carol by Charles Dickens, one of the absolute classics for this time of year, I thought I'd share a snippet from a very special book. Before I do, I want to say if you have any children listening to this, it might be good time for them to go and play in another room. Okay, so I'll give you a second to encourage them to do that. And then I want to read this very short piece from a beautiful book called Letters from Father Christmas by JRR Tolkien. And this is a collection of letters that has been put together by JRR Tolkien's daughter, I think. It is a printing of many letters that arrived between 1920 and around 1940, from the north pole to JRR Tolkien's children. The first one arrived when his eldest son John was three. And they kept arriving every Christmas for the next 20 years throughout the childhoods of his children, Michael, Christopher and Priscilla. And the book has the original letters, which in most cases have the most wonderful illustrations on it all done in pen and ink. And then it has a typed version of the text of the letter so it's easy to read. Some of them are very complicated about all the ups and downs and adventures of life in the North Pole. And some are incredibly short because Father Christmas is just too busy this year to spend a lot of time writing a letter. It's a really wonderful book and this one is from 1926. I'm not going to read the whole letter but just a snippet from the beginning. I think it's a wonderful way to inspire some magical thinking."1926, Cliff House, Top of the World, near the North Pole, December 20th, 1926 My dear boys, I am more shaky than usual this year. The North Pole Bears fault! It was the biggest bang in the world, and the most monstrous firework there ever has been. It turned the North Pole BLACK and shook all the stars out of place, broke the moon into four and the Man in it fell into my back garden. He ate quite a lot of my Christmas chocolates before he said he felt better and climbed back to mend it and get the stars tidy. Then I found out that the reindeer had broken loose. They were running all over the country, breaking reins and ropes and tossing presents up in the air. They were all packed up to start, you see yet is only happened this morning: it was a sleighload of chocolate things, which I always send to England early. I hope yours are not badly damaged" I mean what a great thing for children to remember. And here is a little snippet from my own book Calm Christmas and a Happy New Year, about a very unusual Christmas that I had several years ago. And it's from a section called Arrival."Of all the scenarios I had imagined for celebrating the firstChristmas after my wedding, and the expected birth of our first child on December 11, none of them involved being at a hospital in the middle of a raging storm on Christmas Eve. But then, babies have a habit of sending carefully crafted plans into disarray. I was supposed to have a lovely home birth, all gentle breathing and candles and a warm birthing pool. But with each passing day beyond our daughters due date, that home birth started to look less likely, and I could feel my sense of control disintegrating, along with the last vestige of my image of a perfect Christmas. The vision of us snuggled up with our sleeping newborn by the twinkling lights of the treegone. Opening sweet baby gifts as we sipped mulled wine gone. Tucking into the lavish Christmas dinner we had managed to concoct as clever, multitasking new parentsgone. One by one, the dreams vanished as we edged closer to December 23, when the doctors would insist on inducing. By the time Christmas Eve rolled in on the wings of that burly storm, I was in a sterile hospital ward with a bag of barbecue-flavor chips, rationing myself to one after each contraction. No Christmas tree, no roast dinner, no presents, no guests, no jolly raising of glasses of bubbly. Just me and my husband . . . and fifteen other pregnant women, all sectioned off behind white plastic curtains, identifiable only by their moans or soft chatter or occasional terrifying screams. Many hours later, we were moved into a private room for the latter stages of labor. I stood by the wide window overlooking the Brighton seashore and tried to breathe deeply. My breathing was just about the only thing left that I could hope to control, and I watched the sea foam glowing under streetlights and a distant pier. Glancing at the clock, I realized midnight was approaching. Our baby girl would be born on Christmas Day. And still the thunder raged on. My ideas about Christmas changed forever that night. Sienna May was born as Chopin played serenely in the background and a giant bolt of lightning cracked across the sky, bringing her and a little Christmas magic into our world. And at this time of year, I also love to read poetry. I mean, I This was the Christmas that made me a mama. And it was the one that made me realize Christmas never goes quite according to love to read poetry any time of year. But there's something plan." about seasonal poetry that really makes you notice what's happening in nature around you. Of course, Haiku by the greats like Matsuo Basho, Kobayashi Issa and Yosa Buson or other poets from East Asia. There are so many short, beautiful seasonal poems that you can dip into. And, and it's a wonderful thing to do in the middle of a busy day in the winter. And I love this one from Chinese hermit Hanshan, whose name means Cold Mountain and it's from the book The Complete Cold Mountain, which was translated by Kazuaki Tanahashi and Peter Levitt. And according to Peter Levitt, in his introduction to the book,"The poet took the name Hanshan to express both the place that he lived in in the Tiantai mountain range of Southern China, and the nature of his heart and mind. It was the poet's way of saying, who I am and where I am, and what I am I just one thing." And here's one of the poems from that book. You ask the way to Cold Mountain/ But the road does not go through. / In summer, the ice is not yet melted, / The morning sun remains hidden in mist. / How can you get here, like I did? / Our minds are not the same. / When your mind becomes like mine, / You will get here, too. And then another kind of writing that is wonderful in winter is of course novels that are set in winter, winter or not, depending on how you feel. Maybe you want to read a novel that set in summer or in a completely different kind of climate to the one that you are in right now. I personally love to read snowy novels. And one which was a big hit recently is called One Day in December by Josie Silver. This is from the opening pages of the book. Josie writes so brilliantly to capture the sense of being on a London bus at the end of a hard day in the run up to Christmas. It is just before something very special happens to the girl who is sat on the bus but I'm just going to read this bit and then you can read the novel to find out what happens next."Im so tired I could sleep right here on the top deck of this swaying, rammed-full bus. Thank God Ive finally finished work for Christmas, because I dont think my brain or body could withstand even one more shift behind that awful hotel reception desk. It might be festooned with garlands and pretty lights on the customer side, but step behind the curtain and its a soulless hellhole. Im practically asleep, even when Im awake. Im loosely planning to hibernate until next year once I get home to the nostalgic familiarity of my parents house tomorrow. Theres something soothingly time warp-ish about leaving London for an interlude of sedate Midlands village life in my childhood bedroom, even if not all of my childhood memories are happy ones." I think she says so much with such a simple description. And it's a really wonderful beginning to a novel, you might want to read that one. Another kind of book that I love at this time of year, and anytime here really are books on creativity, I think the time between Christmas and New Year especially can be a wonderful time to, to journal, to draw, to sketch, to paint, and to reconnect with whatever kind of creativity you really enjoy. There are so many great books out there these days to inspire that. One of the absolute classics is The Artist's Way by Julia Cameron, which in some ways is is like a workbook that you can follow for several weeks. There are many groups online where people are doing the artists way together. If you've never heard of that book, it's a really wonderful one to explore. It's not just for people who want to paint, it's for any kind of creative person. One of my favourites at the moment that I'm just revelling in is Drinking From the River of Light by Mark Nepo. I love anything that he writes. And this is a book all about creativity, definitely worth a read. Another person I would read anything that he's written and I do is John O'Donoghue. And he has a wonderful book called Divine Beauty. And sadly, he's not with us anymore. But his words live on. And I often return to them, especially in winter. And this is a little snippet that I thought I'd share with you today, from the book Divine Beauty."When we awaken to the call of beauty, we become aware of new ways of being in the world. We were created to be creators. At its deepest heart, creativity is meant to serve and evoke beauty. When this desire and capacity come alive, new wells spring up in parched ground; difficulty becomes invitation and rather than striving against the grain of our nature, we fall into rhythm with its deepest urgency and passion. The time is now ripe for beauty and surprise to liberate us." I also think it's a wonderful time to read books about the coexistence of darkness, depression, light and beauty. I would imagine, particularly if you suffer from mental illness or depression, or any seasonal illnesses that get worse in the winter, I'm sure some of these words will resonate with you. They're really beautiful, and written by people who have experienced and still experienced the same kinds of challenges. One of my favourites is The Light in the Dark by Horatio Clare. It is just some of the most extraordinary writing about the weather that I've ever read, but also about how that weather is essentially reflected in the human psyche in the winter. It's beautiful. Another one which I'm going to read a snippet from is The Wild Remedy by Emma Mitchell, who's also written a lovely book called Making Winter which is full of creative projects to get you through the winter, which I would highly recommend. This snippet is from The Wild Remedy, from a section at the end of November. It's written as a kind of nature diary through the months."As we reach the intersection of paths, something catches my eye: small points of pale grey-green on the hazel tree. I move my head to look more closely, and see that they are bright against the background of grey skies and skeletal trees. Paperclip-sized embryonic catkins have emerged. They are the hazel trees male flowers and will continue to elongate slowly between now and February, when they will open to release pollen, to be caught by the tiny cerise star-shaped female flowers. There are several small sights that I seek out during the darker months. Theyre subtle botanical beacons: heartening signs that reassure me of springs eventual arrival. These immature catkins are just such a sign, as are the delicate cow parsley and cleavers seedlings that began to emerge last month. Spring will come; nights will shorten, my thoughts will feel lighter again. " And then finally, I love to read poetry and prose about the triumph of the human spirit or about the beauty of nature at this time of year. And some of my favourites for those kinds of words are of course, Maya Angelou, Mary Oliver, Alice Walker, Atticus and Nikita Gill, and I'm going to read one of her beautiful poems, and from a book called Wild Embers. This poem is called Dark Days. On the darkest days, / I look at the stars, / And marvel at / The patchwork of time / Staring back at me. Not a single burst of starlight is the same age, / Some of these stars / Are born billions of years apart, / Yet travel through time together / Making this beautiful piece of art. Sometime, somewhere, / These stars have already encountered / A better version of me / On her best day looking up at them / And thanking them for helping me see. And this poem from a gorgeous book called Rhythms and Roads by Victoria Erickson. Tthis poem is untitled. Youve landed now / with legs full of the earth / and hair full of the rain / that cleansed and renewed / and gave you yourself again. / Youre now building your world / with wiser hands. / Worship the storm that dropped you here. / It gave you new language. And now its your turn. Heres a writing prompt for you to try today. I want you to tell the journey of a snowflake in any way you like. You might want to imagine its scientific formation, or it's dance through the sky. Or perhaps it's fleeting beauty before it settles and melts, or how its transformed into the left eyebrow of a snowman. You could make it a fun piece of writing, you might become the snowflake or describe its hundreds of colours as it catches the light. If you live somewhere hot, you might write about how extraordinary it would be to see a snowflake. You might write about it as a metaphor for life. Or it might just be a snowflake. There is no right or wrong. Just whatever floats down to you today. I would love to hear what you come up with if you'd like to share it. You can find me over on Instagram@BethKempton. And maybe you could share your poem, or your little piece of writing about a snowflake in a comment on one of my photos, and I'll be sure to see it. If you've enjoyed hearing these snippets of words from other people and have enjoyed exploring your own writing, please do come and sign up for the Winter Writing Sanctuary. You can sign up at dowhatyouloveforlife.com, it's completely free. You'll get two weeks of daily writing inspiration from me as well as one live lesson all about the writing life. I think you'll love it and I hope you'll bring some friends and come and join us It begins on November 23. But do go there right now to dowhatyouloveforlife.com and get your place so that you don't forget about it. I look forward to sharing two weeks of wintery words with you. OK, so now it's time for origin story this week. We're going to be looking at the origin of the Christmas pudding. I chose this because this coming Sunday November 22nd is traditionally known as Stir-up Sunday, when we are supposed to, by tradition, gather friends and family to make a Christmas pudding and then keep feeding it brandy all the way until Christmas. If you aren't able to gather with particular loved ones this year why not think of them as you stir and then maybe even send them a Christmas pudding made with love in the post? That would be wonderful. Be sure to make a wish as you're stirring up this Sunday. My grandma always used to make our Christmas pudding a whole year in advance, and she'd get us to stand on a chair with our little aprons on and help stir next year's one. And then she'd fish out last year's, the one she'd made last year for this year out of the cupboard and we'd pour extra brandy all over it and look forward to setting it on fire on Christmas Day. So here are some fun facts taken from Good Housekeeping.com all about Christmas puddings. I didn't know about all of these, until I looked them up. It's so interesting. Apparently, Christmas puddings would traditionally contain 13 ingredients to represent Jesus and his disciples. It's traditionally stirred - the Christmas pudding -while making a wish, and each member of the family is supposed to make wish and stir from East to West, to remember that the Wise Men visited Jesus in the Nativity story. I have to say after 43 years of eating Christmas pudding, well probably about 40, I'm not sure ate it until I was a toddler, I didn't actually know that about the stirring from East to West. It just shows how many of our symbols we hold dear without actually knowing what the symbolism means. It's so interesting to look them up and find out about it at this time of year. Good Housekeeping also said that the traditional garnish of holly used to represent the crown of thorns, but it is worth being warned that the holly berry is of course very toxic, so you might want to use fake foliage on your Christmas pudding or not put any berries on there just in case someone accidentally eat one eats one, which would not be a good end to Christmas Day. And of course there is tradition of adding coins or charms into the pudding, and it was said that they would bring you luck if you found them in your portion on Christmas Day. Traditionally, the lucky charms were a silver coin for wealth a wishbone for luck, a thimble for thrift, a ring for marriage and an anchor for safe harbour, although biting down on such a thing would surely cause a trip to the dentist with a cracked tooth, so Good Housekeeping absolutely does not recommend that. Whether you make a Christmas pudding, buy a Christmas pudding or substitute Christmas pudding for some other favourite dessert, I hope there is something lovely and sweet at the heart of your celebrations this year. We're going to be talking all about festive food later in the series so make sure you're subscribed to the podcast if you don't want to miss that. Before we wrap up today, here are this week's Get Ahead Tips. It is a good time to start finalising your plans for gathering over Christmas as far as you can, with the everchanging COVID restrictions. As far as I'm concerned, the more simple we can keep it the better this year. I'm making plans that are kind of within my own control. that anything that government announces isn't going to change. I think we've all had enough of things being cancelled this year, so just keeping things simple, and based around our own home, I think is gonna be the way forward for us. This year, if you are going to be travelling, or having guests over, you know, now's a good time to be sending invites, having those conversations, making travel plans, and starting to think about how you can make it really special. As we've talked about earlier in this podcast series, it's always lovely to focus on one thing to do that brilliantly and let go of a lot of the rest and see if that makes a difference to you this year. If you're likely to be going out over the holidays - lucky you - and you have small children, it's a good time to be thinking about booking babysitters, as well as any appointments like hair or nails. I mean, there's something about this year that makes me feel like that's kind of ridiculous. There's no way I'm booking a hair appointment for Christmas Eve because it's not going to happen. But who knows. And I know for some people that's a really lovely part of your build up to Christmas. But perhaps this year, I'm going to be spending some time on YouTube learning how to start my own hair, or do my own nails and save myself some money too. If you want to be super-organised for December, you can start making a week-by-week plan counting back from Christmas itself. I know for some people this kind of thing seems like way too over the top for Christmas. But actually it's a really simple thing that saves a huge amount of stress and can make a big difference by the time Christmas comes around. If you allocate the things you need to do in certain weeks or even on particular days, if you stick to that and aim to get most of your prep done by the week before Christmas. Even if it slips a bit, you're going to have almost the whole week to enjoy the atmosphere and wind down for Christmas instead of winding up for it. I know you might be saying, "What are you talking about woman? I always end up spending Christmas Eve doing everything." But just a little bit of time spent now to plan ahead can mean that you get some precious space as the festivities arrive to really soak it up and enjoy it. And of course, don't worry, I'm going to be here every week leading up to Christmas, with my weekly get ahead tips. So hopefully, that's going to help too. Lastly, if you've been reflecting on 2020, and thinking that you'd like to get more creative next year, or perhaps change careers, or start a business, or grow a business, create and launch an online course as a new income stream, seeing as the whole world is online and learning that way now, or perhaps to write a book, then don't miss our huge sale, which includes massive savings on all of our online courses that talk about all of those things, and becoming more creative, making money from your art, starting your own business, how to create an online course, how to get right a deal winning book proposal, all of those things, we have courses for all of them. And, and our sale will include every single one of the courses, and on my website, dowhatyouloveforlife.com, as well as those run by the art and design schools that I co-founded at makeartthatsells.com and makeitindesign.com over the week of Thanksgiving and through to Cyber Monday on November 30th. We're going to be offering our biggest sale of the year it's an amazing opportunity to invest in yourself, your creativity and your future with up to 50% of those courses. So you might want to follow me on Instagram@BethKempton, or hop on my mailing list at bethkempton.com/newsletter, and then you'll be sure to get updates when that sale is live. I hope that 2021 is going to be a year full of possibility and positivity. Investing in yourself is such a great way to go into the year with that kind of attitude in mind. OK, with that, I wish you a lovely week. Enjoy Stir-Up Sunday if you're making a Christmas pudding this year, and I will be back next Thursday talking all about mindful gifting. Until then, take care. You've been listening to the Calm Christmas podcast with me, Beth Kempton. For more inspiration and ideas, cosy up with a copy of my book, Calm Christmas and Happy New Year: A little book of festive joy. It's available now from all good bookshops or listen to the audiobook read by me. Wishing you a calm Christmas and Happy New Year.