Holly's Highlights

Lessons from a Graduation Day

• Holly Curby • Season 6 • Episode 15

Share episode

Send us a text

Standing at the edge of my daughter's high school graduation, I found myself reflecting on eighteen years ago, holding my heart's desire in my arms. Suddenly here she was - cap, gown, and all grown up. This milestone hit differently as a single parent, bringing both overwhelming pride and that bittersweet ache of letting go.

What messages do we send to a time we will never see through our children? What does it mean to provide both roots and wings? Through tears and celebration, I've discovered five powerful life lessons from this graduation threshold that apply to everyone navigating change: your identity isn't what you achieve but who you belong to; you can step forward without having everything figured out; presence matters more than perfection; letting go is a sacred spiritual practice; and your best days aren't behind you - they're ahead.

Whether you're a parent watching your child take flight, a graduate stepping into the unknown, or anyone moving through life's inevitable transitions, this episode offers both comfort and courage for the journey. As Maya Angelou reminded us, "Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away." Join me in exploring how to embrace these breathtaking moments with faith, purpose, and the confidence that you're not lost - you're simply in motion. Share this episode with someone facing a significant life transition who needs to hear they're not alone on their journey.

Support the show

Visit www.hollycurby.com for more information and to sign up for the monthly Holly's Happenings e-newsletter. Holly's Highlights podcast and the opinions and ideas shared within it are for entertainment purposes only. The advice should be confirmed with a qualified professional.

Speaker 1:

Hi friends, welcome to Holly's Highlights, a podcast designed to encourage, inspire and equip you to intentionally live your life full of purpose. I'm your host, holly Kirby, motivational speaker, leadership cultivator, marketing strategist and personal cheerleader. Let's check out today's highlights. Hey friends, if you've been listening in these past couple of episodes, you're probably realizing they're a little different. They are very personal and I'm hearing from some of you they are even emotional, so I guess I need to add a caution to if you're driving and tears start making it unsafe to drive, please pull over.

Speaker 1:

We've just had so much going on in milestones and moments and, as I've shared before, I really strive to be raw and real and vulnerable with you in hopes to encourage, inspire and even equip, as I may in just being helpful to everyone in this space, to be more intentional in living our life full of purpose. You know if I'm being honest. Today's episode, though, is one that was hard to record, because my heart is just so full, and yet I'm confident I'm going to miss something or wish I had shared this or that which, in my squirrel brain thoughts, I'll probably overthink and recall a week or two from now, but this past week has just been beautiful and full and purposeful, and I've just been so grateful. It has been my daughter's graduation week from high school, and there's so much I could say, and yet I just don't know if words can fully express what this moment of her graduation has meant. So, whether you're a fellow parent, a graduate or just someone navigating a season of change, I hope this speaks to you. You know, maya Angelou, as I've shared before, has said life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.

Speaker 1:

And 18 years ago I held my heart's desire in my arms, and she didn't come with a manual, but she sure came with a heart that instantly became part of my own. She's grown up now, not just taller or wiser, but also braver and more courageous and ever so strong. She's made me laugh when I just didn't think I could and taught me to trust God in ways I never imagined that I'd need to. There were long nights and tears and prayers whispered in the dark and joy so deep it made the hard moments worth it. Being a single parent wasn't what I expected. It's not a road that I would have chosen, but God has protected and provided and sustained me through it. And, above all, he's blessed me richly as I've had the honor of walking alongside my daughter these 18 years, having shared more moments that take my breath away than I can even count.

Speaker 1:

And as we drew closer to graduation day, we did all the things. We picked out the dresses for final dances and cheered at final games, attended final awards nights, even sent out announcements. Of course, some of them didn't make them out. I'm so sorry they're embarrassingly coming. We even secured tickets to the after party, which was in true fashion for my daughter. Not a traditional open house, but she wanted to just simply have our family gather at a rodeo, something she really enjoys doing.

Speaker 1:

But you know, as she prepared to walk across that graduation stage, I found myself questioning a lot. As John F Kennedy said, children are the living messages we send to a time we will not see. Think about that for a moment. There's so much I've learned from these 18 years of raising my baby girl, and yet I kept thinking what else could I have done to be more positively impacting in her life? What will be her takeaways and what do I hope she remembers through these years or takes into that time I don't see?

Speaker 1:

American philosopher Henry David Thoreau said go confidently in the direction of your dreams, live the life you have imagined. As I sat there watching my daughter step across that stage, I saw more than a cap and a gown. I saw courage and resilience and a future full of promise. You know, there's so much that all of us parents, students, friends we can see and learn from the sacred threshold called graduation. Well, let me first start with my daughter, and then you and I will regroup. Baby girl, in the words of Winnie the Pooh, you are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem and smarter than you think. You don't need to have all the answers and life is not a checklist but, as I've always asked you, what's the most important part about life? Having Jesus in your heart.

Speaker 1:

Deuteronomy 31.8 says the Lord himself goes before you and will be with you. He will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid, do not be discouraged. You know that verse. That's been on repeat in my heart for weeks, as you and I have lived it for over a decade, and although I know you're strong and fiercely independent, you're not stepping out alone. You're stepping forward with him. As I've shared with you before, the best way to be in the center of God's will tomorrow is to be in the center of God's will today. You know you've already made me proud, not because of achievements, but because of your integrity, your character, your strength. When no one was watching, you've kept your feet rooted in the Lord and there is no greater joy than to know you walk in his truth. So go, fly, but never forget where home is. You literally are my heart, walking out and about in this world. I will always be your biggest fan and God will always be your firm foundation. Now for the rest of us.

Speaker 1:

What can we learn from a graduation? Well, this moment, this cap and gown, this letting go, it's not just about a girl walking across the stage. It's about transitions, it's about growth, both scary and sacred, and it's about the way God uses seasons to shape all of us. So what can we learn and what actions can we actually apply from the results of that? Well, I believe there's five that we can look at briefly together today.

Speaker 1:

The first one your identity isn't what you achieve, it's who you belong to. American screenwriter Bo Bennett said success is not what you have, but who you are. We live in a world that says you are what you produce. On the contrary, scripture says if we believe in him, then, according to 1 John 3, 1, you are a child of God. Our titles may change, our seasons sure will change, but we can start each day this week with a one minute affirmation or prayer of simply God remind me who I am in you. Second, we can step forward without having it all figured out. I am 45 years old and still trying to figure things out.

Speaker 1:

Martin Luther King Jr said faith is taking the first step, even when you don't see the whole staircase. Life isn't just one straight line. Sometimes it's going to zig, sometimes it's going to zag, it's even going to detour. I am living proof of that and you know what. That's okay. Proverbs 3, 5 through 6, my favorite life verse, tells us to trust in the Lord with all your heart. Lean not to your own understanding In all your ways. Acknowledge him and he will direct your path. So lean not on your own understanding. If we try to understand everything in life, we are going to go crazy. Step forward in faith, my friends. So what's one uncertain area in your life? Write it down, commit it to prayer for the next seven days. Invite God into that space.

Speaker 1:

Number three presence is more powerful than perfection. Some of the most important moments in life are the quiet ones. You know the car rides, the late night talks, which my son is really good at doing, the random I love you's. The setting doesn't have to be perfect and you don't have to look or be perfect either. And, by George, the timing isn't always going to be perfect or convenient. There isn't a single time my daughter has said want to go grab food or want to go for a drive that I haven't done it. Her love language is quality time. So I know that's my opportunity to show my love to her in a way she receives it. If you want to find out more about love languages, I believe that's season three, episode three here on Holly's Highlights. But oh, the power of being present. So pause today, put your phone down, look someone you love in the eyes and really see them be where your feet are.

Speaker 1:

Number four letting go is a spiritual practice, whether you're a parent letting go of a child or someone letting go of control, dreams, expectations, release is part of faith. There are many things, many dreams I've had to let go of. Former United States Assistant Secretary of State for Public Affairs, hodding Carter shared there are two lasting bequests we can give our children. One is roots, the other is wings. Letting go isn't a loss, it's a gift. It's trusting God with what we've nurtured all these years. Gift it's trusting God with what we've nurtured all these years. I have prayed nearly every night at the door of my daughter that she and I would always be close, but that she would be even closer with the Lord. As parents, this is part of what we've been striving for to raise children to become independent, hardworking adults who can not only survive but thrive in this world as they make a positive impact in it to fly. So ask God what am I holding too tightly? Then, in prayer, offer it back to him.

Speaker 1:

I personally know God has far greater plans for my daughter than I could ever put together. I trust him and I want the best for her. So I know I have to hold her loosely so that God can use her in ways that are for her good and for his glory. Number five the best is not behind you, it's ahead. Ralph Waldo Emerson said what lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us. You know, graduation isn't an ending. It's a launch.

Speaker 1:

Whether you're 18 or 80, god's not finished with your story. Philippians 1.6 tells us, he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion. Oh how I am still trying to figure this one out, because behind me are priceless memories with my mother when she was still alive, and in the moment I cherish how things are with my daughter and my son and I under one roof. And yet I know that God has great things ahead. He's not finished writing any of our stories. So might I encourage you and I both to set a faith growth goal.

Speaker 1:

Read a psalm each morning journal, join a Bible study. Just do one small thing to grow forward. May you and I both let go when we need to hold on to what matters and trust that God is still working, especially in the unknown. As we're reminded in Ecclesiastes 3.1, to everything there is a season and a time to every purpose under the heaven. The season is sacred, whether you're letting go, stepping forward or simply wondering if you're To my daughter, you're ready, I see you, I believe in you and, more importantly, god sees you and he's gone before you. You've got this and he's got you To.

Speaker 1:

Every parent listening, your love has not been in vain. Your sacrifices are seeds, and this moment, this is harvest. If you haven't heard it before, go listen to the song Flowers by Samantha Ebert. Of course, make sure to have some tissues handy. Don't say I didn't warn you. To every graduate congratulations. Make sure to thank those who walked beside you on your journey, ideally in a way that will honor their love language.

Speaker 1:

Your life is not just a blank slate that will honor their love language. Your life is not just a blank slate. It's a divine assignment. So walk boldly, be intentional, be kind, dream big and trust him with each and every step and to everyone in transition. You are not lost. You are simply in motion. So keep going. Don't look down or behind. Keep your eyes fixated to the author and perfecter of your faith. Thanks for spending this time with me.

Speaker 1:

If this episode touched you, send it to someone stepping into a new season. Encourage them, love them, walk with them. I am still just flabbergasted. Okay, my daughter would be a little embarrassed I used that word, but regardless, I was sitting at my daughter's graduation when I got a picture of her graduating from a precious friend of mine. Talk about one who sits in it with you. She showed up to watch my daughter graduate. The time that she took the drive. It was the parking craziness, then all of the mass of people. I am so touched by her friendship of encouraging and loving and walking with me oh that I might be that to another. Thank you.

Speaker 1:

Now, if you'd like to receive a free reflection guide based on today's episode, make sure to join our free monthly email, holly's Happenings. Simply go to wwwhollykirbycom that's H-O-L-L-Y-C-U-R-B-Ycom, and click on the join the email button. Congratulations graduates, congratulations parents and guardians and those who have loved and walked beside them. Well, well, this is your new season. Step boldly, step confidently, step in faith and go, enjoy your journey. Thank you for joining me on this journey of life. I hope that today's highlight has been encouraging, inspiring and equipping so you can go out and live your life full of purpose. I'd be honored if you'd take a moment to leave a review or, better yet, subscribe. We can also stay in touch by joining my email list at hollykirbycom, that's H-O-L-L-Y, c-u-r-b-y dot com. Until next time, make it a great day for a great day.