Welcome to the For the Gospel Podcast, where we provide sound doctrine for everyday people. I'm your host, Kosti Hinn. And whether you're listening to this on your favorite podcast platform or watching on our YouTube channel, I'm really thankful that you've joined me for this episode. This is the fifth and final tea as we walk through five T's for a strong 2025 and beyond. And I just want to say I've loved hearing from so many of you, and I'm really glad the series has been helpful. This past weekend we had the for the gospel conference over here with Vodi Bacham and myself, and I got to catch up with a number of our listeners in person. And most of you referred to the series, and one theme had emerged so far this year. You like the practicality of it. And I appreciate hearing that. It's good for me. It's good for all preachers to hear it because I think we're trained to cringe at that word a little bit. I want to focus on exposition and explanation. Those things are in our wheelhouse. We love it. We're Bible nerds. I know you are too. But uh sometimes application can take a hit or take a back seat. And we want to excel at that too. And so the podcast gives me an outlet for a lot of that outside of Sunday sermons at Shepherd's House, where we do aim to be practical. But I want to thank you for the encouragement to mix in these highly practical series throughout the year. And this has certainly been that. Let's review our lists. Time, as in how you use it, temple, as in how you care for your body spiritually and physically, talent, that's your spiritual gifts and your abilities. And then your treasure. We talked about stewardship of money last time. This episode is trust. These are your relationships. It's who you run with and it's who you let get close to you. So I'm setting up this fifth T this way. Safeguard your trust. Safeguard your trust. Your trust is who you're close to. These are your friendships. And the Bible has a lot to say about friendships and relationships and trust and who you listen to and who you run with in life. Outside of a marriage relationship and your kids, if you have them or you will one day, friendship is going to be one of, if not the most other impactful relationship on this side of heaven. And so it's vital to safeguard our trust, who you give yourself to, who you let get close to you, who you let influence you, and who you influence, very important things to think through. Now, first I want to consider the variety of relationships that we're going to have in the Christian life and ensure we understand differences between some categories. Now, I just threw some of these together. Maybe you have other words to describe these, but you've got associations with people, you've got colleagues, you've got co-laborers, some people will refer to acquaintances, and then you've got your genuine friends. I think this may be one of the more undertaught or misunderstood aspects of being a Christian or being in ministry, even if you're uh in that type of context. But associations are people you may be around sometimes and they share common goals, but they don't necessarily speak for you and they don't know you that intimately. They don't have a deep impact on your daily decisions. And so there are associations, people that you get associated with, and that's fine, but they're not your closest friends. And then there's colleagues, and these can be people at work you're around. You appreciate them. The relationship is more professional, though. And you're colleagues because you're under the same umbrella of whatever it is you do. Now there's co-laborers, I would call them, and these are people that you might be in business with as a partner, uh, side by side in ministry or a work situation, uh, some sort of project. These are people, co-laborers, that you experience trials and challenges, victories, and even joy together. Co-laborers can be some of our closest friends because we run the race of work and life together. And yet they might move on or shift fields, and so we have a little more distance between us, and we no longer co-labor together, though we love each other and appreciate the time that we spent together in the trenches. Acquaintances is another category we should think through. Those could be uh those that you know from a distance. They weave in and out of your life, you weave in and out of theirs. This could be work, ministry, uh, through other friendships or just proximity, people that you're around, your acquaintances with, because you're in the same community, the same city, or know the same people. All in all, you're cordial with them, but you have no deep relational equity, and they don't make or break you. And then you have those people who are your deep, close friends. Those relationships are just that. They're deep, they're close, they're honest, they're joyful, they're meaningful, they're reciprocating. You guys love each other and you are willing to lay yourselves down for one another. The kindness goes both ways. You're thinking about that relationship. These are relationships that produce fruit. There's a lot of wisdom, loyalty, comfort, of course, laughs, and hilarious times and great memories. These are people that you've come to depend on. If there was a fire, you'd call them. When you go months without seeing each other, because sometimes our closest friends may be further away or they go through different seasons or we do. You see each other and it's like you just hung out yesterday. Friends, and I mean genuine friends, are a gift from God. I want to turn us to scripture for four key characteristics of genuine friendship that come from illustrations in the Bible. And then I want to give you five questions to consider whether or not you should lean into a friendship or a relationship or back off with some distance and be careful, because it's been well said, show me your friends and I'll show you your future. And I believe that's true. Who you run with will dictate where you run to. And the reason I set it up with those different categories like acquaintances, associations, colleagues, co-labors, and genuine deep friends is because it takes maturity to discern what category people are in. We need to understand that our expectations of a colleague or an association or uh even an acquaintance, of course, are going to be different than someone who is our close, deep friend. We will have expectations of a friend that we would not put on others. And so people may get hurt, they may get frustrated, you may have conflict, or sometimes we get very offended by people because we view them in one category or we view everybody in the same category. I mean, all these people are my friends, and so so-and-so, and so-and-so, and so-and-so aren't meeting my expectations, or they're not doing this. And you think, well, you know, you you don't really see them that much, and they're they're a colleague and they're someone you appreciate, but you shouldn't expect things of them that you would expect from someone, say, that was very close to you, or you refer to as your best friend. And so these are important categories. Again, it takes maturity to discern the difference because there are those people that don't know how to discern which category you're operating in. And so they just get mad, they get their feelings hurt, or they get very offended by you, and you didn't realize that you were being put in the same category as, you know, their spouse or their best friend, and you just thought, you know, I've been busy. So these are important things. Particularly four illustrations, four key words or key characteristics of genuine friendship. These are the kind of relationships that you should certainly look to as an example, and of course, they shape us in the image of Christ. The first example will be Ruth and Naomi, we're gonna talk about loyalty. The second is David and Jonathan, we're gonna talk about love. The third, Jesus and his disciples, let's talk sacrifice, and then Paul and his co-laborers in ministry, let's talk support. I'll briefly cover each one of these, and then I've got the five questions that I want to ask you, and we'll decide. Should we lean into that relationship or should we back off? Number one, Ruth and Naomi, loyalty. Loyalty. One of the most powerful Old Testament books is the least studied, some of the least studied in the list. Maybe uh uh the the book of Ecclesiastes, maybe some of the minor prophets. Ruth tends to be in there. I preached it last year or so, and uh people said I've I've never heard that preached before. And I thought, yeah, I mean, it's kind of a rare book that people don't often take you through. But the book's incredible. It's powerful. One of the most powerful books in the Old Testament, and the reason for that is the book of Ruth is about God's sovereign plan to bring about his Redeemer to save his people. The story is about the providential line of David that leads to Christ coming as a baby in Bethlehem. And yet, within the story itself, we see various themes and characters that are worth emulating. The story isn't about Boaz being kind, but he certainly is someone that a husband might look to. The story isn't about Ruth being loyal or Naomi's uh life turning around from being bitter to then being blessed. The story's not about those things. The story is about God's sovereign plan to bring his redeemer about. And yet, like the Bible always does, it teaches us incredible lessons along the way. Many have taken the book of Ruth to be a love story. It's a bad idea. It's not a romance novel. But again, Boaz, great example of manhood. Um, conversely, people will only focus on the loyalty of Ruth and Naomi and how that's what a real daughter-in-law would act like. Maybe that's a good point, but it's not the overall point. And yet again, still, there's something in the relationship between Ruth and Naomi that speaks to the way genuine lasting relationships work. And above all, how God will use the loyalty in our relationships to bring about his sovereign purpose. See, God's sovereign plan is a driving thread or theme in the book, and he uses that characteristic in Ruth to bring about the situation that comes when she's there and Boaz sees her. After losing her husband and having nothing for herself but these two other widows, of course, her mother-in-law and her sister-in-law, Ruth is told, Go back to your people. Naomi says, Come on, go, you you two go back. At least you have a fighting chance. You can marry again, be provided for, and you could be with family, familiar people. You don't want to be with this old widow. I'm going home, and look, there's just nothing for me. I can't even help you. And in response to Naomi's orders, her other sister-in-law, Ruth's other sister-in-law, goes back to her pagan people. And you can't fault her for that. We don't want to make too much of that. It's exactly what they would do in that culture. In fact, it was wise. But Ruth refuses. In Ruth chapter 1, verses 16 to 18, she says to her mother-in-law, do not urge me to leave you or turn back from following you. For where you go, I will go, and where you lodge, I will lodge. Your people will be my people, your God my God. Where you die, I will die, and there I will be buried. Thus may the Lord do to me, and worse, she's making an oath, if anything but death parts you and me. When she saw that she was determined to go with her, that's Naomi, she said no more to her. In the bigger and primary storyline of Ruth, we're seeing God's providence and his sovereign plan of redemption unfold. He's preserving the royal line of his son. In the lesser but still helpful storyline of human relationships, we see Ruth's courage, her loyalty, her devotion, her humility, and her worship of the one true God as an example worth emulating. And these are the qualities that foster healthy friendships. Loyalty is a characteristic that you want to see in the people that you trust, that you're going to give your heart to, that you're going to share your life with. Loyalty is important. Number two, the example of David and Jonathan and their friendship we see in scripture. This is love. Love is one of the characteristics that is a powerful example in their friendship. The Bible says that the reason David and Jonathan had such a strong friendship is because of that word, love. 1 Samuel 18, verses 1 to 3 says, Now it came about when he had finished speaking to Saul that the soul of Jonathan was knit to the soul of David, and Jonathan loved him as himself. Saul took him that day and did not let him return to his father's house. Then Jonathan made a covenant with David because he loved him as himself. It says it twice. The covenant of friendship, the covenant bond between David and Jonathan is driven by this deep brotherly love. And you notice the language. That's the stuff that lifelong friendships are made of. I love you like I love myself. Therefore, anything that would hurt you, hinder you, or hamstring you, I treat that situation like I would if it were me. I'm not worried about myself. I'm not looking to win or have my way. I want to reduce the likelihood of pain because of love. I want to put you above myself because of love. We consider the best interest of one another because of love. And so love is something, a deep, reciprocated love that you want to see in friendships and relationships that you'll give yourself to. This is a wise way to use your time. It's a wise way to steward your life this year. Number three, Jesus and his disciples, and the characteristic here is sacrifice. In John chapter 15, verses 12 to 15, Jesus says this. And I want to read all the way to 17, by the way. So just roll with me here. This is my commandment, that you love one another, just as I have loved you. Greater love has no one than this. Here it is, than to lay down his life for his friends. You are my friends if you do what I command you. No longer do I call you slaves, for the slave does not know what his master is doing, but I've called you friends. For all things that I've heard from my Father, I've made known to you. You did not choose me, but I chose you, and I appointed you that you would go and bear fruit, and that your fruit would remain, so that whatever you ask of the Father in my name, he may give to you this I command you. Here it is, that you love one another. Jesus' point. He starts with love, he ends with love. It's a sacrificial love. He wants that to be driven towards one another or pointed towards one another. And this point is all about sacrificing and laying down our lives for one another. Now, Jesus is the first to model this. And then he calls his disciples to it, and that includes us. Genuine friendship, the kind of relationships you want to lean into, the people you can open up your heart with and trust with intimate access are those who operate the way Jesus describes. This is what we're called to do for one another. Sacrifice is the stuff that real friendships are made of. It says, I love you more than stuff. I love you more than my money. I love you more than work. I love you more than myself. I love you more than results. I love you more than success. I love you more than winning. I love you more than building what I'm trying to build. I love you more than having my own way. I love you because you're my friend. I once heard a pastor say that he would pick a building over people because you can always get more people in the church. And even if you get a building, the church will grow with more people. But, you know, you can't always get another building. There's a lot of that in the church today where pastors lead this way, where the building is the ultimate thing. People are just a means to an end, or having a big ministry is the goal, and people are just a means to an end, or building something. For some in business, we see this. I've seen this in the church. I've seen Christians rip each other off and undercut each other to make an extra hundred K or to uh get more business or to get ahead financially. Friends, this is the stuff that tears relationships apart and makes us hypocrites, mercenaries more than friends, mercenaries more than disciples. And the body of Christ gets ripped apart. Let it be that you and I choose to sacrifice money, success, stuff, getting ahead, or achieving our big dream rather than sacrifice a friendship. You can always make more money. You can get more stuff. In fact, you can win the day another day. But good friendships are a gift from the Lord, and we should not sacrifice those. Number four, Paul and co-laborers, and the characteristic I want to highlight is support. When you look at the end of Romans 16 and the end of 2 Timothy 4, you're going to see a long list of names that Paul agrees. Now, I'm not going to read them all to you. You can take my word for it, or you can take the word as the word and go to Romans 16 on your own and go to 2 Timothy 4 on your own. Here's what you're going to find. You can take this to the bank. 28 names in Romans 16, and around 17 more in 2 Timothy 4. Now, a few of those in 2 Timothy 4 are bad friends. Remember Demas who deserted him, and then Alexander the coppersmith, who does him much harm. He says the Lord will repay him according to his deeds. But what do we learn from the way Paul talks about his co-laborers in the faith? That good friendships include supporting each other through thick and thin. At one point, one of my favorite examples of this is Priscilla and Achillah. Remember the husband and wife duo in the book of Acts who roll with Paul in a lot of different places on these journeys. And then according to Romans 16, verse 4, he says, greet them. They risked their lives for me, is what he says. He sends greetings to and greetings from these people who had a deep, valuable, close, intimate, sacrificial, supportive friendship with him. Supports a huge part of genuine friendship. Even for people who may be busy, maybe you have a growing family like I do, and uh maybe you're you're living in different states from different friends or different countries, different places. When the hard times hit or when needs arise, or when you're in need of advice or wisdom or encouragement, your genuine friends will support you. When you hit rock bottom, hey, your genuine friends, they'll stick with you. Now, here are some questions to ask yourself as you seek to steward your friendships and safeguard your trust in 2025. Number one, who are the consistent, steady, and loyal people in your life? Lean into those relationships. Proverbs 17, 17 says, A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for adversity. Lean into those friendships that are marked by consistency, steadiness, and loyalty. Number two, who has taken advantage of you, who's taken advantage of you, who's abused your trust, who doesn't reciprocate kindness, or who maybe represents a threat to your family, your livelihood, or your reputation. And by that I mean your Christian witness. You need to back off from those relationships. You can still be a great witness, you can still connect with lost people, but you don't have to put your character, your family, your livelihood, or intimate details about yourself on the line. You can back off from those relationships. You don't need to force friendship with those people. Proverbs 22, verses 24 and 25 says this: do not associate with a man given to anger or go with a hot-tempered man, or you will learn his ways and find a snare for yourself. The proverb basically is saying, look, be careful who you run with. You hang around people and their ways will influence you. And so if you have people that uh don't reciprocate kindness, if you have people who have an attitude problem, they uh abuse trust, they share a lot of secrets, they are a threat to your family or your livelihood. They would sooner take advantage of you before they would ever sacrifice, or your reputation can be sullied by being around them. Back off. 1 Corinthians 15, 22 is also helpful here. Paul warning the church about who they hang around with and uh just a little bit of false teaching or a little bit of these kind of people, divisive, these kind of people, uh shady. He says, Do not be deceived. Bad company corrupts good morals. Number three, who speaks truth, wisdom, and fitting words to you in times of need? Lean in to those relationships. Think of those people even right now. Proverbs 17 6 says, Faithful are the wounds of a friend, deceitful are the kisses of an enemy. That means the people who love you, they're gonna say hard things to you sometimes. It might hurt, but your enemies will lie to you. They lie, and their lies are like kisses. They're deceitful. You don't want their affection because you don't know what ties or manipulative agenda it comes with. Proverbs 17, 27 says, iron sharpens iron and one man sharpens another. You want people speaking truth and wisdom and fitting words to you in times of need. Find some friends who love you but will say hard things to you. Number four, who shares your passion and your commitment to the church, Christ, godly character, and living a faithful Christian life? Who are those people? You can probably think of them right now as I list those characteristics. Yeah, lean in to those relationships, pursue those people, strike up a friendship with them, or nurture the friendship you have with them. Don't take it for granted. People who love the church, love Christ, and they have good character, and they're living the Christian life in the direction you are. Ah, those are good people to run with. And finally, number five, who lacks integrity, who exhibits a prideful spirit, who engages in what I would just Call relational politics and gamesmanship and is hard to figure out. You know those people that you just you just can't put your finger on it. You're not sure if when they talk to you or they engage you, if you can trust them. Are they trying to get information to to get an upper hand or some angle on you? Are they do they get a sense of pride and power by having personal information and they gain your trust and act like it's a reciprocated thing, and before you know it, they're sort of got these narcissistic patterns, and you're going, what in the world? I don't I I have enough enemies. I don't need friends like this. Uh you know, lean into people who you can trust and share your heart with, and there's no gamesmanship. Back off from people who keep you guessing. The goal isn't to be mysterious with our friends. This isn't some weird romantic comedy where you keep a little mystery and you're trying to play hard to get. It's called friendship. Don't play around with people who play games. Treasure those people who tell you what they're thinking and they mean what they say and they say what they mean. Even if you don't always agree. Life is short and our mission is clear. And God is good to provide friendships that are open and honest. And we have we've little time to waste with those who treat friendship like a sinister game of chess, always playing for some angle, very hard to figure out. I hope you'll consider the people in your life that God has given you. And even as I walk you through some of those questions, the synapses are firing. You're thinking of him, her, them going, Yeah, thank you, Lord. Those are some relationships I want to keep nurturing and leaning into. And perhaps there's some people that the Holy Spirit is bringing to mind and convicting you of, and you're thinking, you know, that's that's a person that I want to love, but from a healthy distance, or that's a person that I can appreciate in certain contexts, but I don't need to be sharing my intimate details. And that's a person I need to keep away from my family, my home, and my character and my reputation because they represent a particular threat that I want no part of experiencing the results from. I hope you've had plenty to think about. And most of all, you see the example in our Lord Jesus Christ. I hope the series has been helpful for kicking off your 2025 and that you will consider greatly your time, your temple, your talent, your treasure, and your trust this year. Those are important things that the Lord will use to strengthen your life. Thanks for listening. If these resources have been a blessing to you, be sure to subscribe on YouTube or drop us a review on Apple if you'd be so kind. We're so thankful for God enabling us to provide sound doctrine for everyday people, and we're grateful for your support that makes all of this possible. Have a great week. I'll be back next Monday with another episode. Keep on living for the gospel.