Episode 8: Paris L'Hommie

This week we sit down with model, activist, and icon Paris L'Hommie!

Transcript

Junior Mintt: 0:00

Hello, and welcome back to the moment of truth podcast. This is the show where I invite you to take a moment to reflect and be proud of how far that we have come as individuals and as a community, but also honest about where we still have to go and our growth as supporters and protectors of black trans power, through personal testimony and honest conversation with community leaders, we will recognize the power we all have lurking within ourselves to not only impact our lives in a positive way, but also keep pushing black trans power forward. Okay, I'm your host, Junior Mintt. And let's get into this gig, okay, because the episode that I have for you today is an amazing one. So I want to jump into this thing. And you know how we always have to start it off, we have a beautiful, beautiful affirmation. And this time, I have a shorter one for you that I want you to repeat multiple times. Okay, I want you to repeat this until you remind yourself of how amazing you are, and how far you have come in your own journey. And that today, whether it be good, bad or indifferent, tomorrow will be even better. Okay, the bar will be raised. So repeat after me, I can let go of old negative beliefs that have stood in the way of my happiness. Because my goal is to grow, my goal is to elevate and my goal is to be happy. And I grow with each passing day. And I grow into a better version of myself. I really actually felt the power of that message today. Because after I recorded it, I literally had to hit pause and then repeat it a few more times to myself internally, and then outwardly mainly because growing is not easy and growing, the thing you have to set your intention to growing is not something that is easy. And if it was then everybody would do it. Okay, growing is a difficult thing that you have to put your mind to. And so there are definitely days where I have to put my mind to growth, to love and to kindness not only to the world, but to myself, okay. And so remember that you should repeat that saying that entire phrase back to yourself consistently out loud and in your mind, until you believe those words because they are true, you do grow, you do grow into a much better and beautiful person each day if you set your mind to it, and I believe that we all can. Okay. So with that monologue at a close and thean, we can move on to the next portion of our show, which is a rose into Thor. But the rose and the thorn this week is a very, very interesting and fun one. So let us get into it. The reason I'm so excited to share with you what my rose is, is because as you all know, this past Sunday, it was a very important holiday. It's a holiday that surrounds love, and I got to spend it and celebrate it with someone who I can actually say is the love of my life, the person I'm going to spend the rest of my life with, and I'm just so thankful to have them, it is the one and only me, I am so fucking thankful to have me to have me as a person who protects me who loves me who is always having my back. And on top of it is someone who I have in the darkest of times. And while for me Valentine's Day is basically like what I think everyone should be doing for all the people that they love every single day simply because it is so important to cherish every single person that you love in your life every day and not just on a holiday. But I do understand the cuteness of like, here's a day to like schedule things around even though you know, capitalism, I'm not gonna have a socialist monologue about you know, capitalism and holidays and Hallmark and cards and you know, the whole spiel but I will say I do appreciate a whole like, day that everybody is like spending with someone that they love. I'm not gonna be mad at that. And I got to spend it with the person that I love the most on this earth, which is me because I'm a badass bitch. I'm a relaxed bitch and on top of it, I'm a badass bitch. Okay, and so that is really my rose this week. And honestly, when it comes to my thorn, there really isn't any this week because this week has been a a week of coming into the power that is Jr. And yeah, just really being honest with myself while as well being truthful with everyone else, and that is the power of living your truth in your life honestly, and kindly and yeah, as authentically as possible as who you are. And so there isn't really a thing this week, and also a part of the roses. I know I mentioned that nail polish last week meant it but just, you know, having the nails on, they are just still just as poppin. It's an extra rose this week, because I just love in my hand with these with these nail polish. I'll make wide. I'm just obsessed right now. But all of these are roses. All of these are beautiful, beautiful things. And I hope that all of you all are checking in with yourselves with your roses and your thorns each week too. Because you'll notice there are some times where I have more roses and thorns and where there are more Thorns and Roses sometimes. And so just always being in check with yourself is so important because no matter how the roses or the thorns may be, you know proportioned. The important thing is that you have a grasp of how you felt this week because do not allow yourself to not check in with yourself and go numb, and never listen to yourself. You deserve to listen to your inner monologue. If I can rattle off how I'm feeling into a microphone every single week with you all and truly process my life. You can do it alone without having to edit without having to interview people, you can do the whole spiel of getting to check in with yourself without even having to record it. Okay? So take some time out, sit with yourself, and really ask yourself, How are you feeling? and be honest about it. And then from that point, you can then determine how best to shoot for your happiness because you don't know what happiness looks like if you don't know how you feel right now. Okay. And that is the perfect way to end that little monologue. And if it seems also, like I am rushing right now I am because I really, really want you to listen to this interview. I have been obsessed in love with every single episode. But this one just came out in a way that just really struck a chord. It was one where I think that I have come into my interviewing skills, as well as it's another black trans person. So there's just a deep connection inherently. And I think you're going to find a very, very beautiful conversation that has a lot of wisdom, love. And on top of it, lessons. And so yeah, I'm just so very excited for this episode. And I think you're going to love it as well. And what I want you all to do is make sure that you are sharing and following parents lahoma Okay, because I am so happy that this interview happened and I'm so happy that we got to sit down and have this conversation because when I tell you I've I've really feel like I just walked away from someone who I'm like, I need to spend some more time with you because I need to pick this brain. I already knew she was a badass bitch and an amazingly talented performer and as well as someone who I connected with and loved because Just one look at her social media and just one opportunity to get to meet her in person. And you are enamored and obsessed. And so I'm just so excited for you waterfall as deeply in love with her as I am. She is a fucking amazing person in this interview is truly something to behold. And this is your reminder that this interview actually does have an extended version that is available on my Patreon. So make sure you catch that because you were literally only getting half the interview if you are not catching up on it. Okay, so without further ado, without more buildup, I am so freaking excited for you to listen to the amazing interview I had with the one and only parents love me. Hello, you gorgeous talented siren of a human being. How are you Paris?

Paris L'Homme: 9:06

I'm doing great. How are you doing today?

Junior Mintt: 9:09

I am blessed moisturized and sanitized?

Paris L'Homme: 9:14

Yeah. metering upon the replay.

Junior Mintt: 9:19

That's the perfect paid trip. First of all, have you been outside today?

Paris L'Homme: 9:24

Today? No, I have not I actually just hook up an

Junior Mintt: 9:28

icon that's icon status.

Paris L'Homme: 9:30

I know I am a sleepy person I love sleeping in I love we just like falling asleep randomly. Like it's just the things that I enjoy a lot right now during the pandemic like I have just been sleeping and sleeping and sleeping. And like any little bit of work that I get. I'm like okay, let's set aside time to work but then also plan a nap.

Junior Mintt: 9:49

Yes, that's the self care. We need to be real. That's the self care. Because if there's one thing I try to do is make sure I get seven to eight hours even though I'm like I don't know why. If I sleep past like eight, like eight hours and start getting to nine or 10 I wake up more tired and more irritated. Sure,

Paris L'Homme: 10:10

though, too, cuz like sometimes you wake up and you're like, I'm so groggy from sleeping forever.

Junior Mintt: 10:17

Yes, with this pandemic, how have you been coping with it? How have you been dealing with it? How Has everything been,

Paris L'Homme: 10:23

um, things have been a little, I've just also been having a lot of stuff going on with my life during this pandemic, it like, for some reason, like a pandemic came in, and like, everything else came with it as well. So I've been dealing with a lot of like, resorcinol issues, but like sitting in this pandemic, and like having the pandemic has really helped me, like, sit down, like deal with a lot of my personal issues, which has been great. And just, like, recognize them and be like, and not like, run away from them. Because, you know, I feel like once like, when we're when we're running around, like, we're running around, we don't think about our issues, we don't think about it, we push them aside, especially like living in New York, we're always running around, you know, so that's exactly

Junior Mintt: 10:58

it. There's so little time consistently to sit down and think about how you're actually doing how am I actually feeling? So how have you been processing everything,

Paris L'Homme: 11:07

um, I, I, I've been I've been processing you know, like, being, you know, just like being black and trans is hard. You know, it's, you go through things that like other people don't go through and so like, sometimes you feel isolated, but and it also like that also makes it worse with a pandemic because you're not like getting out to see a community all the time. But I will say that I've had like, a little like a chosen family, you know, like, my pandemic family, but like I see and like, we stay in our bubble. So like, we make sure that we're not like spreading to everybody. Jazz

Junior Mintt: 11:45

jazz, you would Sterling's work together as always,

Paris L'Homme: 11:49

oh, god, yes, darling. I owe it because every day I wake up and swing the stones like are you gonna do look with me? And I'm like, okay, they're a Leo so like they have their Leo so they have like that Leo energy that's always like, let's get into it. And I'm just like,

Junior Mintt: 12:06

oh my god yesterday. Oh, my God name

Unknown: 12:08

and I heard

Junior Mintt: 12:10

the both Leo behavior

Paris L'Homme: 12:13

later you heard Leon they were like attention.

Unknown: 12:15

Oh, look. I love you. Okay, I'm leaving. Bye. I love you.

Junior Mintt: 12:20

Oh, my God. That was iconic.

Paris L'Homme: 12:23

I know. That's, that's how my house is like, it's like a guest appearance every day. You know?

Junior Mintt: 12:27

It's like a Kaylee. Oh my god. You honestly this could be a whole reality show.

Paris L'Homme: 12:33

No, I want it's 100% of reality TV show like we should we think about like how we should just start a YouTube channel together and just sit there and like, paying and like, we just sit there like chat and like read each other the whole entirety. Like, I never have anything nice to say to each other. But it's all in good, Bob. It's all in fine. You know?

Junior Mintt: 12:52

We love it. That's the thing. That's the thick of it. There's nothing better than a good family readings. Yeah,

Paris L'Homme: 12:58

exactly. And it's like when you know what your sister you know that there's no mal intent or anything. It's just like y'all shooting the shit

Junior Mintt: 13:04

out. That's, that's how I grew up. It was just like, every single person was just play in the desert. It was just who could read each other the best who could read each other the house bow? We there's nothing better than a funny, accurate read. And

Paris L'Homme: 13:19

you're like, say that you can't say nothing to it. You know, you're just like, Okay,

Junior Mintt: 13:23

how long have you been Sterling live together?

Unknown: 13:26

Um, so

Paris L'Homme: 13:30

two years, I think it's like coming up on two years. Um, but so I've been friends. For three or four years now. Was my junior year of college, we became friends. Yeah, but um, they started dating one of my best friends in college. And then like, we all just like, became like a group thing. And like, they're still together. So like, we all live together. And it's really cute. Yeah, it's like a little family bang family lives.

Junior Mintt: 13:59

That is so sweet. I know. Before I forget, what is Sterling's Instagram so that way people can follow them. Sterling's

Paris L'Homme: 14:11

Instagram is at Sterling tall NYC. Also, they are going to be teaching a makeup class with Makeup Forever. Yeah, yeah. So makeup. I know. And like they've been like getting a lot of free products from them so that they can like teach the class. It's really cute cuz I get to use them. But if and also the classes. So if you take the class, it's $125. But you get a$50 gift card that goes towards Makeup Forever products. It's really only $75 and then you get like free products afterwards, too. So it's like really cute. That's

Junior Mintt: 14:49

amazing. And you are helping a transfer also helping

Paris L'Homme: 14:52

a trans person get paid and like survive during this pandemic. So

Junior Mintt: 14:57

Oh, that's again,

Paris L'Homme: 14:58

the information on their Instagram Um so like if you go to there and stuff you can find it

Junior Mintt: 15:03

perfect. Oh my god, what have you been working on?

Paris L'Homme: 15:06

Um I've been actually doing a lot of photoshoots recently is this really like incredible trans photographer that Sterling and I have been with it's their name is lax a great day I have to because they're the ones who I when I talk to you about the shoot they're the ones who wants to that wants to do that shoot but they also want you like so badly like they showed me the other day we were like we should we have to have a photo shoot with jr Lake

Unknown: 15:35

I would be honored I would be on Yes.

Paris L'Homme: 15:38

But like they're incredible like so like artistic and like specific and like their lighting is everything and like we've just been like collabing and like creating a lot of work with them I've been cooking always does the makeup so I'll do like the hair and like the styling of the outfits and everything. Yeah, very like editorial very dreamy you know,

Junior Mintt: 15:59

what's the name of the house?

Paris L'Homme: 16:00

We don't have we don't have a house. Yeah, we don't have a house name. Yeah,

Unknown: 16:03

you know,

Paris L'Homme: 16:04

it's weird don't need to get one we didn't know we've been because we been talking about um, we also just like have we do have a house you know, you know Archie Conti ham. Yeah, so like they're like we've been hanging out with them. Like they're like a big part of our house. So it's, we have to, like find a name because like all of us are like kind of like super different in a way but like kind of similar like all of us are very much like comedy but like I do comedy, but like it's very like, like sexual like statuesque, like burlesque comedy, you know, over the top way, but like, like Archie does, like stand up and like Sterling does like Sterling. There's a lot of like a spoken word mixes and stuff like that. All of our styles are like very different. But like we somehow just like work so well together, which I think is

Junior Mintt: 16:56

what college did you go to?

Paris L'Homme: 16:58

I went to Liu post. Wow.

Unknown: 17:02

Yeah. Really? Yeah. A

Paris L'Homme: 17:03

lot of people don't know that school. And whenever I sit there, like What's that?

Junior Mintt: 17:08

Are you from Long Island?

Paris L'Homme: 17:09

No, I'm not from I'm from upstate New York.

Junior Mintt: 17:12

Oh, that's even more of a guy.

Unknown: 17:13

Yeah.

Junior Mintt: 17:15

I haven't been to Long Island or upstate New York before. I've only heard stories

Paris L'Homme: 17:21

completely different world completely different world. I'm telling you, like there's so there's so much more like, it's crazy. Because you live in New York City. And you think that like New York itself is like such a like a progressive state? And like, No, you expect it to like you go to other places in New York and like, you know, you think you want to think everybody's show but like, it's not like they're they're very outside of New York City. You know,

Junior Mintt: 17:49

when I really think about all of the stories, all of the people I know who live there who are like, Yeah, no, it's like literally just as bad as you were thinking, Oh,

Paris L'Homme: 17:59

yeah, it's really like the South but like, like up in New York, which I feel like makes it worse. Because like all these like, they don't have like hospitality, like southern hospitality, like they do, like, in the south, or like, at least so you go to the south and like, go have some hospitality. And if they're, if they're racist, they will let you know that they don't like you. So you can avoid them here. They're so fake. They're so fake. You never know. Like, you're gonna walk into a place and they're gonna be racist or not. And it's like crazy.

Junior Mintt: 18:24

One of the things that I do love about this other you know exactly where you do and do not want to be New York, there is no, there is no way of knowing. It's just it's so insidious. And so just like literally, I went to college and Emerson in Boston, in Boston. Oh, complete, like, I always tell people the reason I grow my hair out is because it's like in Boston, I had to travel 45 minutes outside the city to find someone who cut black people's hair is crazy. Like I learned how to cut my own hair. And so literally, during my graduation at Emerson, like this was 2017. Right before I moved to New York, and literally, during the graduation, the commencement speaker said the N word like it was like, yeah, mind you, the person from our year who was the speaker, like, who was chosen as a speaker was a black woman. There was Anita Hill, who was the black woman who, who stood up against clarence thomas and made the accusation the 90s. Like Claudia Rankin, Jamaican amazing black poet, was getting her honorary degree there was a speaking, it's like, literally all of these amazing black women are standing on the stage and then this white man comes up to speak because he wrote he was the writer of The Lovely Bones or some shit.

Unknown: 19:43

Alien word way. Yep,

Junior Mintt: 19:45

yep, yep, he lit like it was like one of those things where like, literally, I was sitting next to multiple people. I was friends with who like were black. Mind you at the school, like people made up less than 1% of the population of the school. So it was like literally the six of us was six of us were sitting there. And I just looked at them. And literally, we just all looked at each other. And it was just like, of course.

Paris L'Homme: 20:08

Of course,

Junior Mintt: 20:08

was there anything? Well, I was gonna say Was there any of it at like, Liu, but like, of course,

Paris L'Homme: 20:14

of course, I also went to school for theater.

Junior Mintt: 20:18

Same

Paris L'Homme: 20:19

so like, I don't you know how the feeder schools are like, they're, they're, like, want to pretend like they're so progressive, but like, you know, they're racist. And you know, they're transphobic. And you know, that they have like a lot of underlying microaggressions all of them. But I just remember, we actually with everything that happened with like, the Black Lives Matter protests like last last June, and everything, and around that time, all of the black even like all the black graduates and all the black people, like from the school, our school, like made like a little like Group, a community and like went against, like all our white professors. And we were like, Listen, y'all need to get your shit together. Like stop being micro aggressive to all your black students, because like, you're driving them away and killing all of your path, killing all of their passions, and making them feel like they won't be able to work in the acting community, and in the theatre community. And that's how I felt leaving the school. And that's like, why, like, drifted in so much towards drag. Like, when I left college. We had our little piece with them, we had our little talk with them. And they're like, trying, you know, which is cute. They, they are cute, it's cute for them. It's a cute look for them. But they're they're hiring more black professors. You know, they're trying to like outreach more to like other black communities instead of just like going to unified and like, which is like white Central. And they're like, trying to like go into the communities and be like, hey, come audition from our, for our school. So I hope that they like, take this more seriously. Seriously,

Junior Mintt: 21:44

Emerson was a private one too. And it like, Oh my god, it's such an uphill battle, especially

Paris L'Homme: 21:51

because you know, these white kids have money, and they're gonna flop their money the whole entire time. So yeah,

Junior Mintt: 21:58

damn, wow. Cuz it seems like the only Wow, Damn, I'm just really thinking about the fact that like, some bitches really, like, Damn, can really just pay $60,000

Paris L'Homme: 22:14

and take all their parents money and go to school and like, be fine, because they're spending all their parents cash on, like, nice clothes. And like, you know, all that stuff where like, we had to, like work for all the shit that we had, like, you probably should. I was on work study, you know, like, we're on to like, Oh, my God.

Junior Mintt: 22:31

It was literally work five jobs. Literally, it was like five jobs at one time. And then also being an RA. It was like, it was a it was a time. But honestly, that's, I will say, it prepared me because it was just like one of those things where like, I was black, Trans and Queer, and like, have the most difficult spot possible, because it's like, all of these people are telling me I paid money for this experience. And that this is why I'm working so hard. So it was like, Oh my god, I really have so many things, hoops to jump through, just to live let alone like, you know, actually thrive, that when I think about like this pandemic, even in my like deepest bouts of depression, I still was able to just like create something, and still, like, be connected through that. And I will say I've just like so proud of myself for using that trauma to like, push me forward. Yeah,

Paris L'Homme: 23:31

exactly. Because a lot of also you have to remember like some people, like when they experience trauma, it's very hard for them. You know, I'm like, Huh, like, that's very valid,

Junior Mintt: 23:39

you know, it's very lately.

Paris L'Homme: 23:41

I also feel like it's very, very easy to get stuck in trauma right now. And like having a creative, like outsource and like a creative like outlet is like very nice to like, be able to just like, get your trauma, you know,

Junior Mintt: 23:53

it's so sweaty, I'm the type of person who would like I can easily get stuck in one spot. But I've realized that my, the way that my emotions work and everything is that I really can only process things while I keep going. like nobody goes anywhere. If I stop the car is stalled. So I need

Paris L'Homme: 24:13

to know now. So like what's your what's your son and your moon and your rising? I'm sorry.

Junior Mintt: 24:19

But I always think mine is so interesting, because so I'm the youngest of three kids. And my oldest brother is in June and he's a Gemini that's my middle. Oh work. Yes, June 5. My other brother is may 19. And he's a tourist and I'm April 3, and I'm an Aries. And so we all go in order but the thing about my chart is my son is an Aries. My Moon is a tourist and my rising is a Gemini.

Paris L'Homme: 24:48

So you get you also get like a lot of that energy from your brothers and sisters too. So you're probably like getting a lot of that. Yeah,

Junior Mintt: 24:56

what is what about your placement so

Paris L'Homme: 24:58

my son is a Gemini. My rising is an Aquarius, and my moon is in Virgo. Which is very nice because if I had no air in my chart, I swear to God, I'd be a hot like, I already am a hot mess. Like I'm such a, I'm a very chaotic person. But like if I did not have that Virgo moon like, I don't think I'd be able to like I don't think anybody would be friends with me.

Junior Mintt: 25:21

hot mess. Virgo mood of it all the Virgo mood of it all. What is the most abundant thing in your chart?

Paris L'Homme: 25:29

It's actually pretty balanced between Gemini Aquarius and Virgo. And then I have a slap I have a splash of a cancer and my Venus.

Junior Mintt: 25:39

Oh, that's an interesting romance.

Paris L'Homme: 25:41

Really a I'm a very romantic person. I love being in like, I wouldn't say love being in romances with people. But like, I'm very much like, I love to flirt. I love to like be romantic with people I like you know, just like giving, giving love to people. And it doesn't even have to be like romantic love, like any kind of love. I love giving love to people.

Junior Mintt: 26:01

Jazz, literally, I really, really connect to that. Because this pandemic, specifically the last like, two months has taught me something that is like, what something that I've always known but it just like hit it home where I was like, okay, universe, that lesson has been learned. I got it now. And it's showing myself the same attention and respect that I pay to everyone else. And it's one of those things that is so interesting now that I'm really in the mindset of it and consciously working towards it consistently. Because now it just, it's so interesting that I find how much more light and free I feel now that it feels like, yeah, it feels like I'm looking out for myself the way that like, the hurt child inside of me was looking for another person to take care of.

Paris L'Homme: 26:54

Yes, that is very true. Because I also, I've also realized that like, I also like my brothers also have cancer as well. So I get a lot of Yeah, that cancer energy from from him. And so like, I'm also very much like, Oh, I feel I've noticed that cancers love, like to be like with other people and they like love, like, being in love. And like I was like that for a very long time. And then like, I and then I also my firt The first time I ever like dated someone, like had a big relationship. They were also a cancer. So I was like, yeah, yeah. And so I was like, you know, after that I was like, I think I need to like figure out who I am and like figure out how I like love My love myself a little bit more, you know, because I don't know, I felt like I was giving my too much of myself to like other people and especially to my relationships. I was like throwing so much of my like, romantic and like, you know spiritual energy into a relationship that and that I lost myself. I was losing myself all the time.

Junior Mintt: 27:53

Mm hmm. I think that brings me to another question for you, which is what have you been pondering about yourself? What have you been discovering about who you are? What questions have you been asking yourself?

Paris L'Homme: 28:03

That's, that's a, I've been I literally so since I'm a Gemini, you know, I asked myself questions literally, every day, I wake up in the morning, and I go, so what's the meaning of life. And I sit here and I read my little books, and I write my little journal, and then I talk and I like to think about like, what's going on in my life? No, but, um, I I've actually made like, a, during the pandemic, I feel like I've made a huge like, step in my life trans identity. I, you know, there was it's not like, I was holding myself back. It's just like, I feel like I got stuck for a second I got complacent was like happy with just like who I was as a trans person. And then like, I started seeing a lot of people that I know. So just like moving to Brooklyn, I'm still a little bit like new to like New York and like Brooklyn, so and like seeing the trans community there. I was, like, you know, there are different ways to I always felt bad because I was like, never wanting to be like a sis passing trans person. And I always was like, beating myself up about that and being like, you know, why don't I ever want to transition? Like, what is that? Like, why is that a thing and then I was like, that's just not my journey, you know, and like I get so stop putting myself down for that and just like, live live my translate entity, you know, so that's been something that I've been working on, like pondering. I also just like have been, I my family's like really, really Christian. And so like I've been and like that's something that like I've struggled with my whole entire life. It's just like growing up in the Christian church and like being trans and like being queer and feeling like out of place. And so I've been like trying to I've been working a lot on like spirituality and like, finding other ways to like you know, connect with our Creator and like the creator or like whoever you want to call them and making building my own relationship with them. And you know, I've been getting into like reading Tarot and like, doing My crystals and you know, like, Jazz Age and like, you know, just like also just like trying to learn about like other religions and cultures and like different spiritual beliefs and like, there's this book that I've been reading called. Yeah, it's called queer magic. Yeah, and it's basically about it's literally, okay, it kind of just gives a history of Lake queer deities or like trans deities or like, like how trans people have like been throughout like, other like religions, and like belief systems, you know, and it talks about how like trans people and like non binary people have, like before, like Christianity have always been held in such a high regard within like, their, their spiritual system, and they're, like, usually more like, priest or like, you know, like spiritual guidance guidances or something like that. And it's just like, giving me such empowerment, you know, it's helped me like, you know, be okay with like, being just having gender dysphoria, like because you know, gender dysphoria comes up. And sometimes it does have to be like, you know, just remember that, that this is something that wasn't given, like gender dysphoria is something that's been put on to us by like society, you know what I mean? Like, we just, we were once like, seemed like, this is normal, like, this is completely normal and fine. And like, we've always been seen as that and like, society has come and told us that. Yeah, so

Unknown: 31:18

yeah.

Junior Mintt: 31:21

All of that, I'm so happy to hear you deserve it. First off, congratulations on opening new chapters, and growing and evolving in your transness. wherever you're at as a trans person is where you are meant to be. I am so happy and excited for you. Because is well, I trust me when I tell you, me and my family every single Sunday, for the first 1213 years of my life. You You were going down to our Baptist Church, you were sitting in the Pew, you were listening to it, actually, I think that was actually up until I was like 15, like baptism, like all of it. And so I think that when I look back on my journey, as a trans person, and as a queer person, it's one that the moment I started to have my own connection to the universe to the divine. And I started to get that connection for myself, was the moment that I kind of felt a liberty to even begin to explore myself, because there's something that's ingrained within black Baptists, religious, like upbringing that just instills some level of like, your identity is like, in so. Exactly, exactly, exactly. And so it's one of those things where I'm so happy to hear for you, because that is, that's an amazing, amazing piece of yourself to get into communication with because it's been,

Paris L'Homme: 32:50

it's been really helpful, you know, just like knowing that, like, I don't have to, it's just like, also like, being able to, like erase like a lot of like traumatic experiences that I've had with Christianity, you know, and like, since my parents have been so religious our whole entire life, it's like, they've always used God to like shame, me and my transness and stuff like that. So it's like, been nice to, like, have that relationship. So I don't feel shame like I did before for being trans.

Junior Mintt: 33:16

I'm so happy for you think, because it's a very specific trauma, to have that growing up. And I'm just so happy to hear that. You're, you're healing that piece of yourself. And you deserve to have that heal. I'm

Paris L'Homme: 33:31

glad that you're doing it too. Because it's like, I think that a lot of trans people like have gone through what we've both gone through and like have had to like grow up and mature, especially black trans people have had to, like grow up in the church and like, feel bad about themselves for just existing and existing in their truth and like they don't deserve.

Junior Mintt: 33:48

Literally, the first interview I did for this podcast was with Klondike. And we literally recorded for two and a half hours. And it was amazing. And we went into so many different stories about like growing up in the church and these different experiences. And I actually just had to go back home to DC for my grandmother's funeral, which was one of those things where I didn't even realize how much dysphoria I was having, just thinking about going because my family had never been together, like literally in like 10 years minimum. Like all of me, my brothers, my mom, my dad, and some extended family to like it was the first time ever we'd all be in the same location. And realizing before going bit like Oh, wait, I am only having this dysphoria, because I am trying to reconcile being myself around people who have a different requirement for who I should be. And that was the moment where I was like, Oh my god, there's no need for me to be anxious. I only care about what these people think. So let me stop giving a fuck about what they think.

Paris L'Homme: 34:55

And you know, especially if they're not gonna get with you and like you're at the point that like, we're grown You know, like I live in New York, you live in New York, we're paying our own bills and stuff like that you have to live your own life and stop caring about, like what your family thinks. Because at the end of the day, you're gonna leave and go back to your place.

Junior Mintt: 35:10

If there's any bright spot for you, it's that I got to go home for my grandmother's funeral. I was never in the closet or anything with my family. It's like I was exactly what I was the Instagrams, the Instagram, like, they know me. But I never got the chance to ever say it to their face, because I really came to terms with my queerness when I was in college, and then by that point, everybody was gone out the house, it was like, we were never all in one spot. And so I got to come out to everybody at this funeral even it's like Trans and Queer, and all the things. And everybody was amazing in a way that I couldn't. I could have never foreseen it or told it. But it was like one of those moments where like, I didn't realize how much of me not speaking my mind came from this portion of myself that had never got the chance to be honest with them face to face. Mm hmm. And it has just been a phenomenal growth. And if there's anything I can tell you, it's just standing in your truth feels amazing. Yeah. And just make sure you keep doing it. Just because you're absolutely beautiful. You're absolutely amazing, you're talented, and all the amazing adjectives I could describe you with. And so yes, just keep living your truth. And I'm

Paris L'Homme: 36:23

so happy that you're coming in the new chat, your transness I think my next chapter is like, like, making is like, doing exactly like what you did. And like, coming out to my family, like my family knows. And like, a lot of like, I talked to it, like, some of my family is like, very, like cool with it. And like I talked them about it, like my brother is like, super, super cool with it. And like we very, like we talk and like I they're very open to like being educated about it, you know. And I have family that's also just like, very open to being educated about it. And like they're not, you know, but also, like, most of my most of my issues comes from my parents, you know, my parents never really have never really been on the same page with that kind of thing. It's very much like very rarely, I will say they're a little bit older in terms of my, my dad is 60 My, both my parents are gonna are with me, my mom gonna save me this year. Yeah. And so it gets very hard when they've been living your entire life believing one thing, and then like, all of a sudden, they have to, like change and like think and like, I know that it's going to take them time, I have had to, like, cut my relations with them right now just because like, they can be a little like, overbearing, and like we'll never like try to like, if I felt like if I didn't cut that they wouldn't have tried to understand me, you know, it would have been like them at least seeing me as, as, you know, like my, my dead name. And like as my as like, the not trans person, like trying to tell me that I'm not trans or like trying to tell me that's not a fake. I mean that it's just the fame. And I'm like, No, this is real. Like, I don't know why you think this I've been putting on dresses since I was four years old. And like, I remember like as a kid, like growing up just I one time my friends asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up, and I said I want to be a woman. Not even knowing what that meant, like, at all, like not even knowing that I could be like non binary or like be trans just knowing that, like, I wanted to possess that feminine energy and like that I had it inside of me and I just wanted to own it, you know?

Junior Mintt: 38:29

Yes. Oh, that's amazing. That is amazing. I Oh, it's so funny. Stories are very similar, very similar. Because, yeah, my mom had me at 38. And she is, is she going on 60 to 60. Because she's, well, she's 63 now. And I'm sending you all the love and all the positive energy on your journey, because I'm so happy to hear that you'd like to cut them off. Because it's the type of thing where it's so we're not taught that it is alright, to put that boundary up with a parent.

Paris L'Homme: 39:05

Yeah. And like, we need to have our own personal boundaries. And like, if there's something not serving you in your life, I'm not saying like cut it out completely, but like, there are ways to be like to distance yourself. I can love you from a distance, like peers, I love my family and like I you know, we've been through a lot of stuff that's been like, kinda like, messy and like messed up. But like, we've also had a lot of leg growing and like sharing experiences and like I, I really like hope that they, they can learn and like it's just like they, for some reason, like they have a hard time like changing you know, and like want not wanting to change but like they have a hard time listening because again, they've lived their lives where they think that what they know is is is the Bible, it's like the what they you know what they know. And so and that's what's gotten them through their life, but like we have to also acknowledge that the world is different, that I'm a different person. You, both of you, um, I, and that we all go through different, like, we may have gone through similar experiences, but like, ultimately, at the end of the day, I deal with my experiences different than you do and like how you cope with your experiences, and is not how I cope with my experiences. And I Yeah, and it's just like, I, I have, like, so much respect and love for them. And like, I just, I just hope that one day we can, like, you know, like, put our differences aside and, or, and just, like learn to like coexist with one another, you know,

Junior Mintt: 40:33

oh, completely, completely. And I love everything that you just said, because I think that especially growing up black, there's a level of like, you're not taught that you have autonomy over yourself, that like, at the end of the day, your parents make the final decision for everything. And it is one of the most empowering things that I got to learn as a black trans person was the power of, I'm not gonna allow you to treat me this way. And I have the right to say that, yeah, and that I

Paris L'Homme: 41:04

was gonna say, especially like, as an adult, because, like, I it's gotten to the point where like, I have to live my life for myself. And like, because like, at the end of the day, you can't always like be my parent, you know, and you can't always like I have to pay my own bills, I have to go to work, and I have to do my own thing. And like, I live so far away from you. It's like you can't, you can't have autonomy over my life. And I and I have not, you know,

Junior Mintt: 41:30

period. And I honestly think that is probably the perfect place for us to leave this conversation. I am so thankful to have sat down with you, you are not only a kind and a deep human being, but also one of my favorites. So thank you for being you.

Paris L'Homme: 41:48

Thank you, thank you for being even also being kind and beautiful and just welcoming and warm and just so easy to talk to, you know, that's what just talented as but I remember coming to your show for the first time and just being like, wow, this feels like church and I'm so happy that I came here.

Junior Mintt: 42:03

Thank you. Thank you. I honestly, it's been a very interesting time over these past few months because I feel like I've my voice has grown to something new. And I cannot wait to share it. Like I'm working on some project that I'm very, very, very excited about that. I'm like, I just I'm so excited to share it. So thank you. I'm excited. I love you, Paris. And before we go, what is your Instagram and what is your Venmo? And what is your all of everything?

Paris L'Homme: 42:38

Um, my Instagram is at Bad Girl Perry. That's ba de GURL pa ri You can also follow me on Twitter. I'm a complete and utter hoe on Twitter. So if you want to see my nudes, or slide into my DMS

Junior Mintt: 42:57

slippery mama

Paris L'Homme: 42:58

I take those as well. That's which bitch parry that's wi tch bi tch pa ri Yes, no. And my Venmo is to Paris. And that's super easy. I just I was tired of going to gigs and being like my Venmo is that been GPR 612 hash tag as

Junior Mintt: 43:22

a license plate number. I love you Paris. I love you so much for sitting down with me. I'm honored.

Unknown: 43:33

I'm honored.

Paris L'Homme: 43:34

So So God when you asked me I was like

Junior Mintt: 43:38

a course you're a legend.

Paris L'Homme: 43:40

I'm gonna cry. Don't say that to me.

Unknown: 43:43

You are

Junior Mintt: 43:45

owed it. Now you can absolutely tell for sure that I was not exaggerating about how amazing that interview was. And I know that you were about to share this. You're about to hit like your own subscribe. Because I after this interview, a lot of cogs started turning and I think I have an amazing evolution for this podcast that involves some amazing people who were involved with it before. And yeah, if you made it this far in the podcast and you kept listening That's a cute little like, I guess a preview like you got to kind of like behind the like theme Sneak Peek to the fact that this interview just really triggered a bunch of really amazing creative ideas in me and get very excited to see how they manifest. And on top of it. I cannot wait to see exactly what pairs the homie does with her art and her career. But before we finish this episode out, I do have one final segment that I want to go into. This segment is called a moment of clarity. And with this segment, what I want to do is I just want to reinforce theme or an idea. So that way, it is something that kind of is a companion to the interview. So that way you can kind of keep chewing on a thought or a belief or an idea afterwards so that way, it's kind of like, like a palate cleanser. So that what Oh, nowalk is not a palate cleanser, because I don't want to cleanse your palate. I guess maybe backwash. Maybe that's what it is, because I wanted to go along with it. Yeah, I guess, maybe the Welcome to the bootleg bat wash, okay. Because this is going to be just a real moment to remind you all that it is okay to be sad about something that you thought you had healed from. Because oftentimes, we believe that once we have gotten over something, once we have healed something, or once we think we have healed something, that we won't have emotions towards it, or we won't feel sad, or happier, necessarily anything or society will guilt us into feeling that whatever we do actually feel it's just bad. And I want to just remind you all that there is absolutely no bad way to heal. And there is no wrong feeling to feel when you have healed or when you think that you have healed, because it is so easy for us to consistently sit and judge how we feel and judge ourselves for it and feel like we should be at some better space. Or we should be handling something better, when the truth of the matter is, you were handling it the way that you were handling it. And that's it. That's just a simple fact of it, there is no way you should be handling it, there is no different way that you could have handled this, you handle it the way that you do. And in the next time that you are faced with something similar, we can use the lessons that we have learned from our past, to inform the future. And so just remind yourself that your emotions are never wrong or bad or incorrect. It is just something for you to ask some deeper questions too, to get to the bottom of who you are. Because I know that oftentimes, I will not actually ask myself the deeper questions that I need to get to the true clarity and resolution that I need. And I kind of was, you know, taught to shame myself along the way in that process. And so having to not only unlearn that, but as well remind myself that whatever I'm feeling, whatever I feel when I look back on things in my life, whatever I feel it's okay. It's who I am. And if I want to work towards feeling something different, I can do that. Or I can be fine with it. Either way, what you're feeling is you and don't let anyone make you feel bad for it feel judged for it or anything, because who you are is exactly who you are meant to be. So just know your junior, your friend, Junior yo cousin, Jr, your neighbor Jr. is here to support you to love you and let you know that bitch, we will make it through this. Okay, we're gonna make it through whatever it is in life, and we will be stronger for it. Will it suck going through it? Hell to the fuck Yes, I can tell you it's not gonna hurt. But what I can tell you is we got to get through it together. We will support each other through it. And on top of it. We are going to laugh over some drinks about all of the shit that we have gone through in the future. Okay, bitch. So scene, that is the end of that monologue. And that also means it's the end of this episode. I am so honored and thankful for every single one of you who is listening, who is sharing who is loving it, who is giving me your opinions, I am so thankful for you. And I promise you some really, really freaking amazing new content. Okay. I am so excited about it. And I am so excited to share it with you. So thank you. Thank you, thank you. And on top of it. Oh, extra reminder, do not forget that there is an extended interview on my Patreon with Paris Lomi. It is like I all I can tell you is don't miss it. You will really miss out. It's like the untucked of this. Really you are only getting half of the story. Okay, literally only half of it. You're actually only getting half. Okay, that's the last time I'm going to say half. I love you all so much. Thank you so much for tuning in. Thank you for being supporters. Thank you for showing your love. I am eternally grateful to you all. And on top of it. You will hear from me next week with another amazing guest and another amazing interview. Please be safe. Please take care of each other. And I will see you soon. With all of my love all of my heart. Junior Mintt Expo Expo.