Fear, Change, and Doing The Thing!

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Transcript

0:00

Hello. I am so happy that you are back. For Episode three of the mediocre mom show, I'll admit I was a little bit nervous to hit record today and I've been putting it off for quite some time because I was feeling a little bit bad about the last episode. I put it out there even though it was a total shit show, because I wanted to show how hard it is to really do anything with little kids around and the entire episode was completely hijacked by them. If you haven't heard it, go back and listen. I mean, you can hear crying and screaming and I have to stop 50 million times and someone shatters a table. It's kind of crazy. But I did get some good feedback from some of my listeners. But I also just felt like maybe I can't do this or maybe I shouldn't do this because I'm not ready or I don't know how to use my editing software. I am just kind of struggling as I learn how to do all of this and. You know, I'm not going to lie seeing some people that I know who are also starting podcasts and they're able to pay for extra services like editing and things like that, when I'm just over here trying to do every single thing on my own for my own show and for my own products and for my own store. And, you know, it can be overwhelming and daunting at times. And so I did. I procrastinated and I came up with every excuse in the world why I couldn't do episode three. But it's time to get back up on that horse. It's time to not be perfect, but be better. And so here we are. I was thinking a lot about what I was going to talk about today because I have so many different topic ideas, and it can be hard for me sometimes to stick to one thing at a time and not get a little excited about too many things at a time. But just struggling to get started on Episode three had me thinking about how not only it can be really hard to start something when you're scared, but to go a level deeper than that, I always try to go a level deeper and try to get a little bit further into the conversations that we're hearing a lot on other podcasts and on other blogs. And being scared and starting anyway is a major topic. But I think what we're missing right now from these people who are offering all of this wonderful advice is that one step further, which is you're not just going to try something the first time and then not be scared to do it again. Things take repetition and take time. And, you know, I'm already two episodes up in the world for everybody to listen to. And I was still scared to do this third episode. So I don't want you to feel discouraged if you're living by the narrative that if you just start, everything will be fine and then you start and it's still not fine because we still have to get over this hump. There's the learning curve. There's the fact that we have to suck at whatever it is. First, we have to get our reps in. We have to learn how to do things. I have a friend who does craft some things for her business and she's working on tumblers and she is making a lot of mistakes right now and starting over and doing the best that she can to make her products perfect. And she's not getting discouraged at the fact that she might have to start a cup over. And I really want everyone to think about that, that maybe you're not making custom tumblers, maybe you're not recording podcasts, maybe whatever it is you're doing just because you did it once already doesn't mean it's going to be easier the second or the third or even the tenth time. But I think if we just keep pushing ourselves and keep trying, that that fear will eventually be replaced with confidence because we are gaining the tools and the knowledge to do the things that we want to do and do them well. So I'm wondering if you guys are willing to reach out to me, whether it's on social media. You can find me everywhere at Mrs. Mediocre Mom and let me know what it is that you're starting or have already started and you're just really struggling through those first steps. I mean, I'm on my second year of Mrs. Mediocre Mom and I'm still struggling with those first steps of learning how to own a business. So I want to hear from you guys, too. What is it that you are working on? Big, small. You know, I want to know all of it. And I want to know what your struggles are and how you're coping with them. If you have advice for me, I'd love to hear that. Or if you need advice from me, I would love to help you there. But yeah, reach out to me and let me know what you guys are struggling with. I think that sometimes we allow ourselves to feel like. Certain behaviors or certain feelings are innate to us, we were born a certain way, we were raised a certain way, and so certain things can't change or certain way of thinking can't change because that is just who we are. But as it turns out, even the things that are hardwired into us can be changed as long as you're doing the consistent work. It's if I'm being honest and I don't tell a lot of people about this and the couple of people that I have told were actually a little bit shocked because they know me and this side of me sounds so different. But when I was younger and my relationship with my husband was just starting, I didn't know that it wasn't normal to fight and scream. And, you know, I would break things or throw things or or or knock down doors or I even knocked over a piece of furniture. Once I would see red and I would rage. I mean, you could consider everything I was doing, I was doing pretty abusive, actually, and I grew up in a house where there was a lot of yelling, a lot of fighting, and I didn't realize that it wasn't how other families or all families operate. And a lot of families do operate that way, but not all families do. And it took a lot of work and therapy and years of focusing on being a better version of myself to completely rewire that portion of myself. I am not a raging crazy adult like I was in my young adult years or my late teen years. I it wasn't like I got to wake up one day and it was just gone. I had to really learn how to control my anger and control my thoughts and control my actions and think before I do things. And I was able to do that. I completely changed that about myself. And I have not been like that or been that person in many, many years. Something that was innately me that was a triggered response that I thought I had zero control over. Turns out I was able to control it. And so if you're feeling like there's something about you that's really hard to change or that you can't change or that you want to fix or that you want to be better, it's not easy is what I'm getting at. The work is not easy. You have to really want it. You know, people say your wife has to be strong enough, your wife, to start something new. You're y to change something old. You're y to be better, to do better, to advance in whatever. And that's true. You do have have to have a strong enough y, but you have to make sure that Y is about you. In order to make the changes that you want to change and so this is me on Episode three, showing and proving to myself and to my listeners that I can beat the fear of continuing this show because just like changing my anger habits, I can change my fear habits and so can you. We can do literally anything we want and we set our minds to and it's something that we tend to tell little kids, but we forget to tell adults that if we're just willing to put in the time and the effort and use the tools that we gain along the way, then we really can do anything. I want you to try something. I want you to think about the thing that you are wanting to stop or start or change, whatever the thing is, and I want you to write it down, and then I want you to write the worst case scenario. What would be the worst thing that could possibly come of this? Where is your fear coming from? Then I want you to put the best case scenario, where do you want this change or this new thing to bring you, even if it is a ridiculous dream? Just write it down. And I want you to compare the worst case scenario to the best case scenario. A lot of times when I write down the worst case scenario and I read it back, I realize my anxiety is ridiculous and that worst case scenario is not even something I should ever worry about. Other times that worst case scenario is something that I can then think about and come up with a plan for if said worst case scenario happens. So if you're a planner, this exercise is going to work because you can help yourself know exactly what to do if things go wrong, or you can look and see that what you think will go wrong might be a little bit ridiculous. And I want you to focus on the things that could go right. What are these changes or these new things going to bring to your life? That's what we need to focus on. And if we're not a little bit uncomfortable and a little bit scared, then we're not growing. And we need to use that fear and we need to use that anxiety to our advantage. And we need to use the amount of energy that that gives to our bodies. Even though we feel like it's a negative energy, we can switch it around and use it as a positive energy and use it to help us. So think about that. I want you to write down these answers. I want you to message them to me, D.M. them to me, email them to me, posted on Facebook or Instagram and tag me. I want to be able to reach out and thank you or discuss with you individually. So please let me know what you come up with. We'll just say this is like a little bit of homework. And then if you get any value from any of this or you just enjoy listening to me drone on and on, then share the episode with your friends or post it on social media and tag me so I can thank you. And, you know, check out Mrs. Mediocre Mom Dotcom. There might be some blogs in there that resonate with you and help you feel less alone. Let me know if you want to talk about a journal or some digital downloads to help you look more into yourself. Let me know if you want to talk about possible coaching with me one on one or maybe even group sessions. We can talk about that, too, but really, I'm here to serve you in any way that I can. So hearing from you is really the best thing. I love it, actually, so I look forward to hearing from you. I hope that this episode brings you something I don't know. I tend to go off on tangents. So when I listen to this back, I'll know if I actually said anything of value. But I hope to see you for Episode four. I hope to see you slide into my dreams. I hope to hear how things are going good, bad, ugly. And yeah, I guess we will see you soon.