Transmuting BUT Into I GET TO

Seeing how to unstick things by taking on a Lego perspective.

Transcript

Transmuting BUT Into I GET TO

As an Akashic reader my days are filled with clients telling me "I really want to *insert activity here* but I can't because...." This is then followed by us working through what is required for them to do the thing, which is often very much doable regardless of the "but". From this I can say the two most common stuck points for people in achieving what they want are:

1) They don't have the necessary components at this time to make them happen such as resources, time, support, knowledge, skill, or funds. 

2) They need to empower themselves in some way, whether this is changing the narrative(s) they tell themselves, claiming an identity which includes the thing they want, unwinding the life structure they've manifested so they can build a new one, or valuing themselves enough to invest in their truth.

Ironically, the first is the one most people will point to as insurmountable, but in reality, is the easiest to map out a solution for. No matter whether your desire is to create things, travel places, or have experiences, the resources are out there. In fact, there are entire industries dedicated to making sure we can get resources in any way we desire from networking sites, barter communities, auctions, service marketplaces and so on. If we can imagine it, there are ways to get it done for even the most outrageous, pie in the sky dreams.

The much harder problem is allowing ourselves to connect with what we want as this almost always involves taking on personal transformation. Well, rather, the process of doing what a person really wants causes a transformation of that person over time. Ok, so oftentimes both.

For example: A client wants to be an artist, but...they know they can't because they are married and have a career. Their narrative is there just isn't time. Between what their spouse wants, the overtime, maintaining the house, their travel schedule... it just isn't feasible.

In this situation being an artist is completely possible, but two things would need to change: the narrative being told and where the person's energy is being invested.

The narrative being presented here is "Everything in the person's life is more important, relevant, and necessary than being an artist". But what if that weren't true? What if the narrative were changed so being an artist was equal to maintaining the house, the overtime work, and the travel schedule? What if doing art was something which could be equivalent to daily hygiene like tooth brushing?

With just this internal shift, being an artist goes from something impractical, "someday", and hopeless to completely in reach within 24 hours. The "but" has been removed. 

So how do you get unstuck when it seems like the issue is so ancient, insurmountable, and implacable as the La Brea Tar Pits?

Well, See your life from a Lego perspective.

We build our lives through our intentional actions, our reactions to circumstances, and the opportunities we take on or pass by. Which means every piece of our lives is a Lego we've fit together in a certain way. But Legos are built to be infinitely repurposed. We can pull them apart, fit them together in a different way and have an entirely new thing.

I recommend starting with the statement "I want to, but..."

Take the "I want to" Lego and remove it from the "but..." Lego.

Then add it to a new Lego called "so I get to."

The new narrative is then "I want to, so I get to."

As what we say is what manifests as truth within us and therefore out into the world, when we change our narrative in this way, it becomes a reality which sets things in motion.

Also, The Universe won't punish you for doing what you're here to do.

We don't have only one soul purpose, we have hundreds. They are often interconnected, of varying lengths and complexities, and rarely require a life of excruciating hardship with brief teases of happiness. Often what we think of as frivolous, indulgent, selfish or a waste of time is a key component to what we're meant to be and do in this life. 

The universe doesn't punish us when we engage in the urge which has been nagging us forever because honoring our own divinity is one of the most core things we as souls can and should do. And in our doing so physically in this life we are giving permission to others to do so as well.

Which is not to say everything will necessarily be smooth sailing. Investing energy into the thing you want to do and be could lead to a need for boundary setting. While uncomfortable, this helps us and others learn lessons. It can build self-esteem, teach others around us how to do and be in the world, and lead us to further unfold our gifts and abilities into this life. All from something as seemingly inconsequential as knitting or building kit cars.

So, keeping yourself from doing the thing(s) you really want to do is actually a bit selfish, counterproductive, and negative to yourself and others. The more you are being you, the better.

And You have time.

It doesn't matter how busy you are (unless you are a new parent of an infant, have 5 children under the age of 10 all at home due to Covid-19 or you're the sole caregiver to someone who needs 24 hour care), you are choosing where and how to spend your valuable time. So, choose differently.

Too often we focus on big plans, whole archetypal shifts of identity, or overwhelming goals which validate our inability to fit them into the life we're living and keep us from moving forward.

What I recommend is letting go of all of it. Just let it go. Believe it or not, if these things are meant to be, they will manifest naturally and of their own accord in time. Most often these big things come into being as a consequence, not of our massive efforts to force them through mental battles and sacrifice, but instead because we are being in each day how we desire to be.

Instead, focus on what you do best, focusing on today. You have control over your day so invest some of it in doing or being what it is you want. Give yourself 30 minutes. Do it first thing in the day or during lunch or right after work. Never let it be the last thing at the end of the day because it will never happen, and you'll feel betrayed in the bargain.

Set aside a moment to do something, a piece, a part of what it is you want to be doing. If you can, increase the amount of time each day and look for larger blocks of time on the weekends. And if you really need to look at the big picture, think of what you'll be grateful for or regret more, lawn care and "honey do's" getting done, or having manifested your best self into the world.

And then, there's the 10,000 hours

We have an odd relationship to our passions and time. Our culture has decided everything has to be done well or not at all. We deify the best, look at excellence as the measure of success and go even further by needing people to be unique, niche, and extraordinary in some way. At the same time, we deride what is weird, quirky, different as if these weren't judgmental ways to speak about two sides of the same coin.

If you aren't participating in a thing regularly, putting in your 10,000 hours of practice, then you'll never get anywhere. I once heard an interview with the artist Flora Bowley where she was asked about her instant success and she laughed out loud and then asked if the interviewer were referring to the 17 years she spent starving, living in her car, having showings in her living room? That instant success? Every journey starts with the first step. Very few to no one is an expert right out of the gate, no matter what stories the salespeople tell you. 

In this embodied life we don't control everything, but often we manifest and influence far more than we're willing to admit. Just changing 'but' to 'so I get to' will put a spotlight on where we are able to enact change, release ourselves from our stuckness, and move forward into happiness. We don't necessarily have to suffer for what we want to be, but we do have to engage in being it. The good thing is, it's something we enjoy so no matter what ends up coming into being, the journey is fun.