Chicks Talking Shift

Elevated Parenting - Guest Series with Laurie Farley, Angel & Alecia

January 20, 2021 Angel & Alecia Season 1 Episode 3
Chicks Talking Shift
Elevated Parenting - Guest Series with Laurie Farley, Angel & Alecia
Chapters
1:10
Intro
4:10
Introduction to Laurie Farley
9:05
Why spiritual parenting is important
10:32
Admit your mistakes
13:00
Envy vs jealousy - what's the difference?
15:40
The 5 Natural Emotions
17:50
Failure
19:00
Family Enrichment Kit
20:30
Teach self-evaluation and choice-making
27:50
We're guidance counselors to teens
31:39
Be aware of unconscious social pressures
36:37
Windows of opportunity open only briefly
39:04
Say yes more than no
40:53
Ask kids about consequences to their actions
43:15
Listen to your child with presence
45:51
Allow children to be themselves
47:56
Acknowledge their be-ing as much as their do-ing
49:48
Managing pity parties
52:47
Embody what you teach your kids
53:18
Admit your parenting vulnerabilities & mistakes
53:46
Parenting is the highest form of leadership
54:40
Recap
Chicks Talking Shift
Elevated Parenting - Guest Series with Laurie Farley, Angel & Alecia
Jan 20, 2021 Season 1 Episode 3
Angel & Alecia

🌟🌟🌟Special Guest Series Kick-off🌟🌟🌟

Hey Moms, Dads, Grandparents, and Parents-to-be...we got you! 📣

Parenting through the shift can be rough and much of what we learned doesn't apply to these kiddos. These times call for fresh perspectives for a more connected and honoring way of parenting which looks and sounds a little different. 

The days of “Do as I say, not as I do” were for Boomers and we’ve cut our own path.  What we know is that it takes a village so consider us your Soul Nannies as we dish on tips that raise the family vibes and elevate the parent/child relationship.

This juicy chat illuminates the importance of:
🌟Embodying what we teach
🌟Drawing out the wisdom that resides within each child 
🌟Helping children manage their energy/emotions
🌟Teaching children to self-evaluate and make choices

Join the chicks as they chat about conscious parenting with Laurie Lankins Farley, best-selling co-author of Conversations with God for Parents and Parenting Through Divinity.

Peace Out ✌ & Big Love 💖!
Angel & Alecia

Link to Podcast on Boundary Setting

Chicks Talking Shift on Facebook
Chicks Talking Shift on YouTube 

Show Notes Transcript Chapter Markers

🌟🌟🌟Special Guest Series Kick-off🌟🌟🌟

Hey Moms, Dads, Grandparents, and Parents-to-be...we got you! 📣

Parenting through the shift can be rough and much of what we learned doesn't apply to these kiddos. These times call for fresh perspectives for a more connected and honoring way of parenting which looks and sounds a little different. 

The days of “Do as I say, not as I do” were for Boomers and we’ve cut our own path.  What we know is that it takes a village so consider us your Soul Nannies as we dish on tips that raise the family vibes and elevate the parent/child relationship.

This juicy chat illuminates the importance of:
🌟Embodying what we teach
🌟Drawing out the wisdom that resides within each child 
🌟Helping children manage their energy/emotions
🌟Teaching children to self-evaluate and make choices

Join the chicks as they chat about conscious parenting with Laurie Lankins Farley, best-selling co-author of Conversations with God for Parents and Parenting Through Divinity.

Peace Out ✌ & Big Love 💖!
Angel & Alecia

Link to Podcast on Boundary Setting

Chicks Talking Shift on Facebook
Chicks Talking Shift on YouTube 

00:00
[Music]
00:02
[Applause]
00:03
[Music]
00:04
hi we're chicks talking shift
00:06
and we have had an incredible
00:09
conversation
00:10
with Laurie Farley the author of
00:14
conversations with god for parents the
00:17
topic today was conscious parenting how
00:19
about it Alecia
00:21
oh my gosh that was so good there's so
00:25
many great tips we talk about what
00:28
spiritual parenting is
00:30
and why it is so important for parents
00:33
to be
00:34
consciously aware today more than ever
00:38
and we it's like we're doing double duty
00:40
we got to worry about our own
00:41
well-being but we really got to be aware
00:44
of our little ones
00:45
and big ones as well you know adult
00:48
children
00:49
equally so we did a little round table
00:51
and shared all these conscious parenting
00:53
tips and got into some great dialogue I
00:56
think you're
00:57
going to get something out of it I know
00:58
it's some stuff that I could have used
01:01
earlier on oh isn't the truth and
01:04
the things that I I love all the tips
01:07
that are in there there's some really
01:08
rich stuff
01:09
oh it just it was so rich there's too
01:11
much to talk about
01:13
let us know what you think yeah we hope
01:16
you catch something
01:16
really good that you can carry with you
01:18
in the future with your parenting
01:20
yeah because it's one thing to go
01:22
through the shift and it's another thing
01:23
to be a parent
01:25
going through this shift and so yeah
01:28
we're feeling ya we're feeling you
01:30
we are enjoy
01:39
[Music]
01:51
[Music]
02:01
hello everybody and welcome back to
02:03
chicks talking
02:04
shift I'm Angel carlton and I'm Alecia
02:08
rice
02:09
we're happy you're joining us today this
02:11
is kind of a different episode of chicks
02:13
talking shift as you can see we have a
02:16
third party with us
02:17
and so today's topic is
02:20
on conscious parenting
02:24
something that we are all moving into
02:26
it's needed now more than ever is it not
02:29
it absolutely is totally
02:32
that's what the shift is consciousness
02:34
right
02:35
so we move it into parenting as well
02:38
Alecia and I we have known each other
02:40
for a long time
02:41
and we have met some amazing people
02:44
on our journey and one of them
02:48
is with us today so uh we welcome
02:51
Laurie Farley Laurie Lankins Farley as
02:54
she's known on her books hello thanks
02:57
you guys
02:59
well let me tell you a little bit about
03:02
this amazing woman Alecia
03:04
we've known Laurie a long time in that
03:07
time
03:08
we have watched some amazing
03:11
accomplishments one of which
03:13
is an amazon best-selling author
03:16
for her book entitled conversations with
03:19
god
03:19
for parents by somebody
03:23
many many millions of people around the
03:25
world now Neale Donald
03:26
Walsch who authored the conversations
03:29
with god book series
03:31
and also co-authored with Emily Filmore
03:35
awesome resource for parents especially
03:38
today
03:39
she shared the stage with Neale Donald
03:41
Walsch
03:42
and Dr Shafali who is a conscious
03:45
parenting expert you might have seen her
03:46
and Oprah
03:48
and Laurie's gifts are plentiful
03:52
one of her sole purposes on this planet
03:55
is the gift of her intuition
03:57
she's an intuitive and a medium
04:00
and you can learn more about Laurie and
04:02
her gifts and her services
04:04
at the pureintuitive.com
04:07
I have the honor of working with you
04:10
currently on a project
04:12
for the conversations with god family
04:14
enrichment kit so
04:16
it is an honor to have you here Laurie
04:19
thank you Angel and Alecia thank you for
04:22
that that was
04:23
really I'm honored thank you to know the
04:26
two of you
04:26
and what you've brought into my life so
04:28
thank you for that
04:30
all right well we go way back so we were
04:34
we were all sitting here trying to
04:35
figure out what year it was
04:37
and and it's like our timeline has
04:40
evaporated
04:41
uh but we've known each other okay I
04:44
have to go nick is
04:45
23 years old now he was
04:48
uh when I first read the conversations
04:51
with god books
04:52
he was a baby so it's been 23 years and
04:55
then
04:56
shortly after that I got involved with
04:58
conversations with god
05:00
movement and that's where I met the two
05:03
of you
05:04
uh we started working together on Neale's
05:06
division that he had
05:08
and still has to this day creating the
05:10
school of new spirituality a new
05:11
generation of spiritual children
05:13
that's how we met working with Neale and
05:16
doing some amazing things with the
05:18
with the family empowerment kid as we
05:20
called it back then
05:21
yeah and you can learn more about the
05:22
family kit that's uh currently available
05:25
and on the market
05:25
at cwg.org
05:29
and we'll drop it we'll drop a link
05:31
below for that as well
05:32
yeah definitely yeah so I want to tell
05:35
you what I love about Laurie
05:38
oh my gosh the three of us have had the
05:42
best time working together
05:45
so much silliness and belly laughter
05:50
but what I love about Laurie is
05:54
she is one of the most intuitive
05:58
women I have ever met in my entire life
06:02
she astounds me with the things that
06:06
she knows and on top of that it comes
06:08
wrapped in wisdom
06:10
and this passion and oftentimes kind of
06:13
this humor that just is such a beautiful
06:17
package
06:18
I don't know anybody like Laurie Farley
06:22
and she's brought so much joy into my
06:25
life and she
06:26
is just a big giant heart
06:29
love oozes out of her
06:33
I agree it does it doesn't get any more
06:35
authentic than that
06:37
so ah thanks you guys thank you Alecia
06:41
you know I feel that same way well maybe
06:44
we have different gifts and all that
06:46
because we all enrich each other so much
06:48
but I appreciate those words from you
06:51
yeah well I kind of talk about us being
06:53
like everyday people who
06:55
aren't necessarily ordinary they're
06:58
really
06:59
extraordinary and meant to be of service
07:01
to raise the vibes on the planet right
07:02
now and
07:03
all three of us have that calling
07:07
yes absolutely yeah chicks talk and
07:10
shift is
07:11
perfection really I mean what a what a
07:14
name what title and what truth
07:16
you both have and I know this from
07:18
working with you
07:19
youtube brings such a quality to this
07:22
talk to the
07:23
just the title itself it's important
07:26
because things are shifting so much
07:28
so it's great thank you I'm honored to
07:30
be on today
07:32
yeah very good so Laurie so we're talking
07:35
about spiritual parenting today
07:37
and so we thought we'd just start with
07:39
talking about you know to get your idea
07:42
of
07:43
what is spiritual parenting and
07:46
why might parents want to consider
07:48
parenting a different way than their
07:50
parents did especially right now
07:53
that's such a great question Alecia um
07:55
first let me say this
07:56
spiritual parenting is actually
08:00
the only way to parent
08:04
it's actually the what I say the
08:06
authenticness
08:07
of being a parent having a child
08:10
and bringing the child into the world
08:12
and teaching the child
08:14
how to thrive and how to survive and how
08:16
to be a human being
08:17
that's spiritual just in itself
08:21
so conscious parenting is bringing
08:23
awareness
08:25
to the process absolutely
08:28
you know what's great about having
08:30
awareness
08:31
as a parent it's being aware of the
08:35
baggage you're creating
08:36
and undoing it right away
08:41
right it's like I'm I'm totally aware
08:43
I'm creating baggage for my kid right
08:44
now but
08:45
I'm also aware and how to undo it yes
08:49
uh and that's that's been the process
08:51
and the gift that awareness has brought
08:53
me as a parent
08:55
like I know some of my choices are going
08:56
to impact my child and mold him
08:59
into who he is today and how he views
09:02
the world
09:03
what you're talking about Angel makes me
09:04
think of uh
09:06
if we make a mistake letting our
09:08
children allow our children to see that
09:11
and we take responsibility for it rather
09:14
than
09:15
hide it with an anger or
09:18
impatience you're allowing them to see
09:21
your humanness
09:22
yeah you know that you're not perfect
09:24
and then it allows them to
09:26
feel more that way too yeah you're
09:29
giving them permission to be themselves
09:31
and be their authentic selves yes
09:34
let's just talk briefly about what's
09:36
happening in our world today
09:39
life has changed we are undergoing a
09:42
massive
09:43
shift that has an impact on all of us as
09:46
a human
09:47
and then there are the humans on the
09:49
planet that are
09:50
parenting another child I mean that's
09:53
enough to deal with right
09:55
absolutely and now you're also
09:57
responsible for another human being and
09:59
upbringing them in this in this space
10:03
so yeah what
10:06
is the would you say would be like the
10:10
biggest challenge that
10:12
most parents can relate to with what
10:14
they're going through right now
10:16
well I'm gonna go back to what
10:19
I said and that's honestly emotions
10:22
women are
10:22
more emotional than men they say but I
10:25
know a lot of really emotional men
10:26
but when it comes to parenting
10:29
emotions are huge right now it
10:33
there's so many emotions fear all of the
10:36
natural
10:37
emotions that I think we all must know
10:39
which meal talks about a lot of in his
10:40
book and
10:41
we talk about him you know I'll hold it
10:43
up and you know caution about our
10:45
parents
10:46
the five natural human emotions I mean
10:48
there's anger that's natural
10:50
so we as parents these parents we have
10:53
to
10:54
allow our emotions to shine through and
10:56
I mean
10:57
shine through because those emotions are
10:59
to be acknowledged
11:00
and our children then are allowed to
11:03
show their emotions which are
11:04
anger fear you know and envy and here's
11:08
the one thing that I love to talk about
11:10
in this time especially of the pandemic
11:13
no school
11:14
all of the things right a child isn't
11:17
allowed to really
11:18
envy right now because of financial
11:20
issues going on
11:21
because of um whatever all the
11:24
stuff going on emotionally inside
11:26
parents great
11:28
point five natural emotions uh we have
11:30
it listed
11:31
in the conversations with god family
11:33
enrichment kit
11:35
as well because it is such a huge part
11:38
of becoming more conscious as a parent
11:40
in their emotional state I
11:42
I couldn't agree more yeah the envy and
11:44
the opposite of the envy is jealousy and
11:46
so
11:47
envy's okay jealousy's fear-based and so
11:52
that's not allowed you know not to cut
11:54
you off I'm sorry Angel but if you're
11:55
not allowed to envy
11:56
which is what I'm seeing so much of then
11:58
they become that's where jealousy comes
12:00
in
12:01
which most people can relate to jealousy
12:02
more than they can to envy you know what
12:04
I mean
12:05
right yeah I think where I land where I
12:09
end up landing kind of
12:11
between um envy and jealousy what I told
12:14
my daughter
12:16
um growing up is there's nothing wrong
12:18
with envy and
12:19
as you say envy is an admiration it's
12:22
when you see
12:23
that oh she is something
12:27
that I would like to be you know it's
12:29
something to aspire to
12:31
where jealousy is I don't want you to
12:35
have that thing
12:36
because I don't have it either that's a
12:39
negative emotion and so
12:41
that's always kind of how I've drawn the
12:43
drawn the distinction from myself and my
12:45
daughter about
12:46
the difference between envy and jealousy
12:48
envy is I'm
12:49
super happy that you have everything
12:52
that you have and that you're doing what
12:53
you do
12:54
and boy would I'd like to borrow a
12:56
little bit more and have a little bit
12:57
more of that in my life
12:59
and jealousy is I wish that you didn't
13:01
have it because
13:02
I don't have it totally different kind
13:05
of it's an emotion
13:06
that goes with it right exactly
13:09
our children are not taught how to
13:11
grieve and that's what I want to say
13:13
about
13:13
you know if they lose a blanket at a
13:15
very young age parents just don't
13:17
understand it's a blanket
13:18
or a friend moves out of the out of the
13:20
school district but is it within 10
13:22
minutes
13:23
you know to them it's might as well be
13:25
to another country because it's you know
13:27
like
13:27
devastating and parents we don't grasp
13:30
that concept of
13:32
the grief that they may be having about
13:34
that it doesn't have to be death
13:36
but to them it's a type of death and so
13:38
there again parenting consciously
13:40
through this time
13:41
being able to share the grief and the
13:44
that grief and that and naturally do
13:47
that so that they don't
13:48
turn into an unnatural emotion which
13:50
becomes depression
13:51
so the consequences to
13:54
not being able to show
13:58
the natural human emotions can really be
14:00
devastating
14:01
so so when I hear you say that it sounds
14:04
like what you're saying
14:05
is um allow
14:09
allow make it okay allow them to have
14:12
the emotions that they're having
14:14
even if they're uncomfortable um
14:17
and give a little bit of give a little
14:19
bit of difficulty
14:20
would you mind just real quickly just
14:22
running down the list of what the
14:24
five emotions are you know I will weird
14:27
love and
14:28
so fear love envy anger
14:31
and grief those are the five natural
14:34
emotions that every human being
14:35
really has to feel because the
14:39
opposite of those opposite of love
14:42
if you can't if you're not able to show
14:44
your love can be control
14:45
the opposite of grief if you can't
14:47
grieve is depression
14:49
sadness the opposite of fear is panic
14:52
the
14:52
envious jealousy which we went through
14:55
grief turned into depression on
14:57
love turns into possession and so when I
14:59
hear you say
15:00
kind of going back to what you said
15:03
earlier
15:04
is that um it's not just about allowing
15:08
the children to express what their
15:11
natural emotions are in a healthy way
15:14
but also giving modeling that for them
15:16
embodying that yourself so they can see
15:19
even what it looks like
15:21
through more through a more mature
15:23
person
15:24
and making it okay by like you said
15:26
earlier
15:27
um admitting when you're angry or
15:29
admitting when you're hurt or admitting
15:30
when you're afraid
15:31
or admitting gosh I'm doing this
15:33
parenting thing I don't
15:35
have all the answers and even stepping
15:38
in sometime and saying hey
15:40
you know I'm not really sure about this
15:42
what do you think
15:44
you know it's really kind of opening the
15:46
gates of this is an exchange
15:49
just because I've got more years on the
15:51
planet
15:52
doesn't mean that you don't necessarily
15:55
have something to teach me
15:56
or something positive to bring to the
15:59
table
16:00
for adults absolutely and often what
16:03
happens
16:03
is the culture conditions us out of our
16:07
emotions male
16:08
and female at a very young age and so
16:11
what we're looking to do is nurture
16:14
those
16:15
make those okay and allow it
16:18
by helping them channel it into a more
16:20
positive direction
16:22
absolutely Alecia you said it perfectly
16:24
teaching our children
16:25
today especially that there is no such
16:28
thing as failure
16:29
is huge because as Neale says in
16:33
in a conversation with god for parents
16:35
in that book he talks about how
16:37
you know putting failure that that even
16:40
exists
16:40
in a child's brain is one of the most
16:43
dangerous things you can do
16:45
because there is no failure
16:49
these are times right now where kids are
16:51
feeling pressure
16:52
my sister-in-law is an administrator at
16:54
a school
16:55
and she said the rate of failure is
16:58
increasing so
16:59
rapidly right now yeah the virtual
17:03
teaching environment it's horrific
17:05
actually what's happening
17:07
and so that is such an important
17:10
uh point to talk to our kids about
17:13
failure in the feeling of failure and
17:15
these are not normal times
17:18
so you're feeling a certain way guess
17:20
what everybody's feeling that
17:22
you are not alone no everybody is
17:25
feeling that right now
17:26
it's okay it would be different if it
17:28
were different times
17:29
but this is you know this is what we're
17:32
experiencing right now
17:33
but uh that failure I think um it's huge
17:36
such a huge thing today today
17:40
in fact it's in the family empowerment
17:42
kit the family
17:43
homeschooling kit rather as one of the
17:45
reminders
17:46
we're not going to get too much into the
17:48
kit but it's an incredible resource
17:51
because it has all these 10 reminders
17:53
and
17:54
reminding your children that failure is
17:57
a fiction
17:58
that every trying is a success
18:01
and that every effort is what achieves
18:04
the victory
18:06
with the first no less honorable
18:09
than the last absolutely
18:12
one of the reminders in this incredible
18:14
resource
18:15
that we've you know all had the honor of
18:17
working on and co-creating so
18:21
ah awesome wow what a great start I tell
18:24
you
18:24
this is uh already rich rich dialogue
18:27
and what Alecia and I were talking about
18:29
doing was having something
18:31
where we could all share and infuse uh
18:34
some insights and wisdom
18:36
and in what Alecia actually came up with
18:40
the name
18:41
lightning round
18:42
[Laughter]
18:45
and we're going to kind of do a little
18:47
bit of a round robin round table
18:50
conversation about what
18:53
we feel are really important spiritual
18:55
principles
18:56
uh parenting principles and parenting
19:00
children today and so Laurie will you kick
19:03
us off
19:05
with your first
19:08
spiritual parenting tip for parents for
19:11
most parents right now
19:14
letting go of everything you thought you
19:16
were doing right
19:18
not that you haven't been doing things
19:20
right
19:21
and if you know it's working for you
19:24
that's good
19:25
but if it's not and you know it's not
19:27
working then rethink the way you do it
19:30
your children need to be validated
19:34
through choices being given choices no
19:37
matter how your parents parented you
19:39
you were just you know do what you're
19:41
told no
19:44
let them have choices let them have
19:47
consequences
19:48
instead of punishment punishment
19:53
what ask them give them the choice of
19:56
what would be
19:57
their consequence for this action this
19:59
is giving them the responsibility
20:02
to go through life with integrity
20:06
giving themselves permission to know
20:08
there's consequences to my actions
20:11
so giving your children a choice it's
20:14
going to take a lot
20:15
for a parent it's a lot of work but in
20:18
the
20:18
it's it's kind of like you know working
20:20
for wellness now rather than
20:22
illness later when when I hear you say
20:25
that what I feel
20:26
is that you are teaching two
20:29
extraordinarily
20:30
valuable skills there in a natural
20:33
environment just day-to-day
20:34
situation by situation one
20:38
is how to self-evaluate
20:41
how to self-excavate how to go inside
20:43
and think huh
20:45
what should what should the repercussion
20:48
for this be
20:50
or what what could I have done better
20:53
and I did the same thing Laurie with my
20:55
daughter and so
20:56
there were times when I would say so
20:58
what do you think the repercussion could
21:00
be and what I found is it it
21:02
it helped her kind of check in inside
21:05
and like
21:05
what is what you know what does that
21:07
feel like and oftentimes the
21:09
repercussion would be more drastic
21:11
coming from her
21:12
than than what I necessarily would have
21:15
done absolutely
21:16
yeah and in our household being uh
21:19
having a trainer or
21:21
you know leadership facilitator as a mom
21:23
I got the old uh
21:24
flip chart out pros
21:28
and cons let's let's just
21:31
think through this a little bit here
21:33
buddy you know
21:35
what are the pros and he would come up
21:39
with all the pros he could possibly
21:40
think of and what are the cons and
21:42
and then we'd look at it and really
21:45
prioritize them
21:47
and so he can see all the different
21:50
outcomes
21:52
that's incredible self-awareness
21:55
uh that you're talking about that's
21:57
great stuff
21:59
thank you so much what I want to say
22:01
that can also be in reverse too
22:03
where even as a child gets older because
22:06
you want to develop a relationship with
22:08
your child or friendship it becomes from
22:09
parent
22:10
parenting to a friendship and that's
22:13
like one of the greatest
22:14
things loves of my life right now is
22:16
that I have two boys that are my
22:18
friends that love to talk with me and
22:20
vice versa and I
22:21
want that for every parent you know I
22:23
really do when we do something that
22:26
is inappropriate because we do it's okay
22:29
too I really do the tip I have is allow
22:32
your child to
22:34
to tell you why it bothered them
22:37
what you did what you said so that that
22:40
you can take responsibility for it
22:42
in a way mature way rather than
22:45
just saying I'm sorry for what I said
22:47
and then moving on sometimes it's just
22:48
not enough for a child
22:50
and we're going to teach our children to
22:52
show their children and to show other
22:53
people in their jobs whatever
22:55
relationships that they take
22:56
responsibility oh my gosh
22:59
well you just reminded me and I want to
23:01
get on to the next
23:03
great tip here but I remember when
23:07
nick was going through the teenage years
23:09
where sarcasm
23:11
was at an all-time high what and uh
23:14
attitude just in abundance
23:20
I could not understand where this
23:22
attitude was coming from
23:24
and I was getting frustrated and you
23:27
know and I said you know what
23:29
I'm going to remove him from the
23:30
environment and
23:32
so I said hey buddy you want to go out
23:34
for ice cream
23:36
and he's like it's the middle of winter
23:39
I'm like
23:41
let's go come on so we got in the car in
23:44
chicago and bro to ice cream
23:48
I intentionally went to the one on the
23:49
other side of town
23:51
and I'm like so glad we're doing this so
23:55
nice to get out of the house isn't it oh
23:57
yeah
23:58
like well you know I was thinking you
24:00
know you're my only child
24:02
and so therefore I
24:05
didn't have any practice at parenting
24:07
before you got here
24:09
so you know I'm learning as I go and
24:12
so I'm wondering
24:16
how am I doing
24:19
he's like what I said how am I doing
24:23
as as a mom as a parent
24:26
what's working um what do you like
24:29
what what can I change what can I get
24:31
better at
24:33
he got real quiet
24:37
and he said well
24:40
like when you know you told me to take
24:41
the garbage out
24:43
and then it's not done like that second
24:46
and then you get mad and you end up
24:48
doing it that makes me feel bad that you
24:50
end up doing it when I was going to do
24:53
it
24:54
and and so that's where the attitude
24:56
came from I got to I got to the uh
24:57
the court but I thought I go wow thank
25:00
you so much for
25:02
for letting me know and you know and I
25:05
feel like I'm so busy I just need it
25:06
done because the garbage is overflowing
25:09
and I'm cooking and I can't put anything
25:10
else in there so there's a little bit of
25:12
an urgency in my world when that's
25:15
happening
25:16
and so maybe you know we can both have
25:18
awareness around
25:19
around that and he's you know he's like
25:21
yeah
25:22
and I said what else and he's like
25:26
that's it you know
25:30
I know and da da da da da and I was like
25:33
go on go on you know yeah
25:36
it was such an amazing conversation
25:39
because I took my ego completely out of
25:43
it I'm the mom and I said so
25:45
it was like all right there's something
25:47
out of whack out of balance right now
25:49
I'm wondering if it's something that
25:51
I've done because
25:52
they can articulate their feelings
25:54
exactly so anyway I encourage parents
25:57
to to do that and you'll have an amazing
26:00
conversation
26:01
you'll learn more about and really quick
26:03
Angel with that I just I know you're
26:04
going to love the next tip on iv
26:05
and I just want to say this so what you
26:07
do there what you did with nick and what
26:09
because we've all you know felt those
26:11
those ways with our kids before feeling
26:13
that angst from them
26:15
you're teaching him or parents are
26:17
teaching their children when they do
26:18
that
26:19
what to do in a relationship as they get
26:21
older in any relationship
26:22
but especially a a loving a romantic
26:25
relationship
26:27
yeah so talk to communicate that's
26:29
beautiful
26:30
when they're young you share with them
26:33
your value system and
26:35
all these things about kind of putting
26:36
up the the guard rails and you know
26:39
giving them some sort of direction it's
26:40
like a
26:41
you know a flower in your garden you
26:43
nurture it and this and that the other
26:44
thing but the flower has its own
26:46
programming and so
26:47
it's going to look and be a certain a
26:49
certain thing
26:50
but then when they get to be teenagers
26:53
you're a guidance counselor
26:55
you know and that's when the
26:56
relationship really starts to develop
26:59
and realizing that once they get a
27:01
certain age they're going to be out and
27:03
about on their own they're going to be
27:04
driving they're going to be with friends
27:05
that are driving
27:06
you've got no control anymore so and
27:09
part of that from my perspective is also
27:11
allowing them to make those mistakes
27:13
while they're still at home
27:15
yeah before they get out in the world be
27:18
you know while
27:19
they're still flexible enough to be able
27:21
to learn without making some major
27:23
mistake that's going to last for the
27:24
rest of their life so
27:26
it's so true and then and then you get
27:28
to reap the benefits of those
27:30
relationships as they come into their
27:32
own and
27:32
I know all three of us have had children
27:35
that have come to us
27:37
uh and parents other parents are like I
27:39
can't believe your child
27:40
says that or confided that or asked that
27:42
or whatever
27:43
but it doesn't just happen it's a
27:46
nurtured
27:47
relationship it is created that way very
27:50
intentionally very consciously
27:53
yeah thank you we have a tendency to
27:55
forget as adults that we
27:57
we're so much bigger than especially our
27:59
young children
28:01
and we could tower over them and so
28:03
doing that and I think
28:05
probably all three of us have done that
28:06
with our child I think that's probably
28:08
something that we have in common
28:10
it's the equivalent of getting down on
28:12
your knees on their level and looking
28:13
them in the eye
28:15
because it takes you out of that off of
28:17
that pedestal
28:18
and you have approached them as an equal
28:21
and brought yourself down to their level
28:23
and say look I don't got all the answers
28:26
so
28:27
hey you know how do we work this out
28:29
together what does this feel like on
28:30
your end
28:31
and then you also sharing but let me
28:34
tell you you know if you feel this
28:35
coming from me and
28:36
the urgency it's because I'm cooking
28:38
dinner and I don't have any more room to
28:40
put anything in the trash can so
28:42
yeah sometimes it's urgent so I I like
28:44
that because that was just a great
28:46
equalizer
28:47
absolutely I it was perfect my parents
28:50
would always
28:51
kind of laugh at me because I would
28:52
include nick in decision making
28:54
yeah they're like he's four you know
28:57
like
28:58
I know but um how to be a good
29:01
decision maker something I could use
29:04
some help at because all my decisions
29:06
were made for me
29:08
and so I I think when you're including
29:11
them
29:12
in any kind of decision if we were to go
29:15
on vacation where would you like to go
29:17
what would you like that for dinner what
29:19
do you want to wear today what are your
29:21
thoughts on this
29:22
did you like that movie I mean what
29:25
let's let's
29:26
engage them age them yes you know so you
29:29
can work with your child as they grow
29:31
and that's where I think you start to
29:34
create a relationship other than
29:35
parenting
29:36
and you become friends beautiful great
29:40
great
29:41
well it's what it's what we talk about a
29:43
lot is the fact that when they're really
29:45
young we're putting all of the things
29:48
well that's part of the old paradigm
29:49
right is that we're constantly putting
29:51
things into the children
29:53
instead of approaching them as if they
29:55
have their own wisdom
29:56
and drawing that out of them it's just a
30:00
a beautiful way of acknowledging them as
30:03
souls
30:04
timeless souls and realizing that
30:08
they have something that they bring to
30:09
the table too because I learned as much
30:11
from my daughter if not more from her
30:13
than than what she did for me absolutely
30:17
why don't you share with us your your
30:18
spiritual
30:20
30:23
I'm gonna
30:24
get in here
30:28
probably one of the first places that I
30:30
would start
30:31
is allowing them the freedom to be their
30:34
self and
30:36
recognizing when your shift
30:39
is in it right and so
30:42
kind of a quick story that I'll tell of
30:45
uh realizing something along these lines
30:47
is my daughter when she was young she
30:50
was in kindergarten and she got her face
30:51
painted at school at a at a carnival
30:54
and this kind of ties into what one of
30:56
my second ones is which is
30:58
being aware of how much your actions and
31:01
reactions
31:02
to your children are generated outside
31:05
of yourself
31:06
from social pressure and social
31:08
expectation and so these two kind of tie
31:11
tie in for me and so she was taking a
31:13
bath and she had this face painted and
31:15
I said well we need to wash your face oh
31:17
mommy please don't wash my face I love
31:19
my face paint
31:20
I want to keep it on but the next day
31:22
was a school day
31:23
and I said well no you know you got to
31:25
take a bath we need to wash it off and
31:27
tears are just streaming down her face
31:28
saying mommy please don't wash it off
31:30
isn't that the other thing well I went
31:32
ahead and I washed her face
31:34
and she was so sad and later on
31:38
I realized something that didn't make me
31:41
very proud
31:43
I realized that that face paint painting
31:46
meant so much to her but I was in mom
31:49
mode of bath time
31:51
and the fact that she's going to school
31:53
I realized that I kind of had a
31:55
sponsoring thought that I never
31:56
recognized
31:57
which was you have to wash this off your
32:00
face
32:01
because you're going to school tomorrow
32:03
and what will they think that you didn't
32:05
have a bath
32:08
I went to her the next day
32:12
and I said I want to apologize to you
32:16
I saw how much that meant to you
32:19
and I made you wash your face and I made
32:22
a mistake
32:24
I did it because I was worried of what
32:26
the teacher would think
32:28
that you went to school with crusted you
32:31
know face paint on your
32:32
on your face and that you didn't have a
32:34
bath and that was the wrong reason to do
32:36
that
32:37
I am really sorry and I'm sorry that I
32:39
hurt your feelings that way
32:41
so I think that's a really big one about
32:44
paying attention to what your
32:46
drivers are internally because
32:48
oftentimes we're making decisions for
32:50
our children
32:51
that are really based on our shift
32:54
and it's based on things that are
32:56
unhealed about us
32:58
or external worries about what other
33:00
people will think
33:01
um and it's really not about the
33:04
parenting or what the child needs to do
33:05
it
33:06
needs to do at all and I think that's
33:08
conscious right that
33:10
conscious parenting that's conscious
33:12
parenting
33:13
even awareness only doesn't come until
33:15
after and that's what you were saying
33:17
early Laurie or earlier Laurie was
33:19
not being and also you Angel of not
33:22
being the parent on the pedestal
33:24
but coming to them as another human and
33:26
saying even if it's not in the moment of
33:28
saying you know what I've thought about
33:29
this
33:30
and I realized that that really wasn't
33:32
the right way to do that and I'm sorry
33:34
and in the future I think that I'm going
33:36
to try this it also helps them
33:38
hold you accountable to what you say is
33:41
important to you
33:42
absolutely and communication again I do
33:44
remember
33:45
that speaking of getting caught up in
33:46
our own shift when I was
33:49
you know I've been an entrepreneur
33:50
forever been working home based
33:52
for decades and so
33:55
nick came home from school got off the
33:58
bus came home from school
33:59
ran in the door mom mom
34:03
and I was just finishing an email
34:07
and I'm like hey hold on buddy let me
34:09
just finish this email hey
34:10
how's you know hopefully I had a good
34:12
day sounds like you had a good day I'll
34:13
be right there
34:15
and I finished the email by the time I
34:17
sent it
34:18
I was like all right where is he and I
34:20
went up to his game room
34:22
I'm like hey so tell me about your day
34:25
what happened
34:26
he's like I was all right I'm like
34:30
well no you came through the door you're
34:32
going to tell me something what
34:33
what what happened what's I don't know
34:37
I I forgot what and I was like
34:41
my god to this day I have no
34:44
idea no idea
34:47
why he ran through the door so excited
34:49
calling my name
34:52
he was just happy to see you like he
34:53
wanted to just make his presence known
34:55
Angel like
34:57
no really that's what I think you know
34:59
sometimes our piece is like hey mom
35:01
like they want us to be just as excited
35:02
to see them
35:04
and when we were yeah
35:07
yeah this video game or whatever in you
35:09
know because he knew he could take a
35:10
break after school he had breaks
35:13
and so he had moved on like and it was
35:16
just I'm like I will
35:17
never ever do that again that moment was
35:21
too precious
35:22
and I uh just vowed to myself
35:26
that I will be present for him there's
35:28
nothing more important
35:30
well Angel
35:33
you saying that triggered a memory
35:37
a really strong memory because I can
35:38
tell that's really strong in you
35:41
it triggered a very strong memory in me
35:43
from when we were working together at
35:45
the school of new spirituality
35:47
and we were doing events and stuff and
35:49
it would get close to event time and it
35:51
was kind of a crunch and
35:52
that sort of thing and I'd be in my
35:53
study I'd be on my computer and I
35:55
remember very clearly my daughter coming
35:57
in
35:57
she's probably um maybe in fifth or
35:59
sixth grade
36:00
and she came in with that excitement
36:02
like you say and I was
36:04
right in the middle of something and I
36:05
was have my train of thought
36:07
and and I I learned pretty early on
36:10
that the acknowledgement that they
36:13
wanted or needed something or needed my
36:15
attention was very important
36:17
and so what I learned pretty quickly was
36:19
at least to acknowledge
36:21
and say I I see that you know that you
36:24
need me
36:25
I give me 10 minutes or give me five
36:27
minutes and then stick to that not not a
36:29
half hour later
36:30
stick to that so that they knew that
36:32
they could count on it and I did that
36:34
but what I didn't realize at the time
36:38
was when I went back
36:40
that exuberance was gone and that
36:44
window of opportunity with with
36:46
especially
36:47
the younger ones opens and closes
36:51
very very quickly and so what I
36:54
learned is to pay attention when that
36:56
window of opportunity opens and take
36:58
advantage of it in that moment
37:00
because if you don't often that window
37:02
closes and like Angel you will sit and
37:04
you will wonder from then on
37:06
what was so important because they're so
37:08
in the moment
37:10
that 10 minutes later they're on to
37:12
something else and that's a really big
37:14
one for me too
37:15
Angel yeah and it was when we were
37:17
working together I remember very clearly
37:20
you know they're they're out of the
37:21
house and they're adults yes
37:24
and you don't have those moments anymore
37:25
there's not a parent on the planet
37:28
I can't imagine that doesn't have regret
37:30
so you know like
37:32
that's that's part of that part of what
37:34
we sign up for
37:36
it is it is a it is an evolution it's a
37:38
growing process for
37:39
us as much as it is as it is for our
37:42
children now that brings
37:44
brings us to my spiritual
37:47
conscious parenting tip and it's very
37:50
much in alignment with what we're
37:52
talking about
37:54
and that is to make sure
37:58
that my child heard the word yes
38:03
more than he ever would hear the word
38:07
no beautifully I had to do some
38:10
rephrasing
38:11
and I had to but I you know I grew up
38:14
italian catholic
38:16
very strict environment with three
38:18
brothers I was the only girl
38:20
and so I had a lot of limitations
38:24
very little freedom curfew
38:28
most of the time in which I you know
38:33
Angel's a tough name to live up to let
38:35
me tell you but
38:38
I'll save that for another time I was
38:41
told
38:42
many times growing up no you can't go
38:46
no you can't do that no you shouldn't do
38:48
that with nick
38:49
I realized a lot of those times there
38:52
was there was no reason to say no
38:54
it was their own fears that caused them
38:56
to say no
38:58
or how they were brought up their
39:00
upbringing you know
39:01
old school I loved saying yes to my son
39:05
I loved uh just giving him permission
39:09
and freedom
39:10
yes and it's not like he would ask for
39:12
anything unreasonable
39:14
but I always said yes and then you know
39:16
at times you do have to say no I mean no
39:18
it's usually
39:19
yes occasionally so when that occurred
39:23
I I'm going back to what you said in the
39:26
very beginning
39:27
Laurie I asked him I don't know how to
39:30
answer that buddy I mean what would you
39:32
do
39:33
if you were the parent if you were the
39:35
dad
39:37
and your seven-year-old was asking you
39:39
that ring what do you think is the right
39:42
thing
39:43
and he would always know the truth
39:47
and then not ask again is that simple
39:50
I never had to say no we I mean we talk
39:53
about it and you open this dialogue up
39:55
so they
39:55
understand and they you know can problem
39:59
solve
39:59
themselves and you know what you give a
40:02
child to
40:03
with that Angel with that tip it's is
40:06
trust
40:07
you've got to trust your children and
40:09
first
40:10
they don't develop self-doubt like I
40:13
can't do that
40:14
or no I shouldn't do that or any
40:16
hesitation when making a decision
40:18
it's a confidence that comes with yes
40:21
yes you can and a trust yes of course
40:24
you can
40:25
and and I see that on my son he really
40:27
feels like he can do anything
40:29
and so that's my tip so lord
40:34
that's a good one they're all really
40:36
good
40:37
just real quick too I just want to say
40:38
that I wrote a book called with emily
40:40
called parenting through divinity as
40:41
well
40:42
so there's those resources and I think
40:44
that's
40:45
the beautiful thing because parents are
40:47
having a hard time
40:49
finding resources right now because they
40:51
don't have the school
40:53
resources like they did before
40:56
so I think the stories I think the tips
40:58
and I think the resources
41:00
are so important right now I really do
41:02
we could say it's
41:03
because no one's trying to we don't we
41:05
aren't trying to tell you what to do
41:06
with your children
41:08
we're giving each other ours is merely
41:11
another way
41:12
not the only way the famous words of
41:14
Neale don't you know
41:16
it's just another way and that's all
41:18
that's all that you know Alecia and I
41:20
are doing on chick stock and shift is
41:21
just providing perspective
41:23
hey we looked at it this way like you
41:25
know there's we're
41:26
choosing to have some fun through this
41:28
shift because it's not fun
41:30
and uh if we can have a few laughs and
41:32
lighten the load a little bit let's do
41:34
it you know so
41:35
I think that's a good tip Angel you just
41:37
gave a great tip do that with your
41:38
children
41:39
mm-hmm lighten up with your children
41:41
we'll probably have time for one more
41:43
tip
41:43
each Laurie what's another spiritual tip
41:47
that you would
41:47
you know I I really was gonna say it's
41:49
about listening so
41:51
listening to your children when you
41:53
really don't have
41:54
think think you don't have the time
41:56
which I believe we covered so when when
41:58
our children want to tell us a story
42:00
or tell us about something and they
42:02
don't make any much sense at all
42:04
we don't really listen we go oh that's
42:06
really good oh that's nice so good I'm
42:08
glad that okay who oh yeah okay
42:10
we don't listen to the story which I'm
42:12
finding
42:13
so exciting with my granddaughter
42:16
to listen to them talk about stuff that
42:18
makes to you to me no sense whatsoever
42:22
but to them it's the world listening and
42:24
creating a
42:25
minute with your child to really hear
42:27
listen to their story
42:31
is huge that's all I'm going to say
42:33
that's that's the other tip
42:34
listening when we don't have the time
42:37
that's what Alecia always says
42:38
just be present be present bully
42:42
I think we covered it that was my other
42:43
tip and see them
42:47
listen and see them because when you're
42:50
listening to them you truly see that and
42:52
what human adult okay doesn't want to be
42:56
seen and if we can give our children
42:59
that experience
43:01
of being seen that feeling of being seen
43:03
it's extremely empowering
43:05
the need to be heard and seen it can it
43:07
can destroy
43:08
you right but it comes from not
43:12
being her not not being seen and heard
43:14
when you're a child
43:15
parents that like are dealing with a
43:16
child who
43:18
seems um challenging uh
43:21
over you know too needy or too
43:25
out of control if they stop for a minute
43:29
and really think about it it's probably
43:31
because they're not
43:33
hearing and not seeing their child but
43:35
if you stop and really
43:37
put your energy five minutes a day to
43:39
see and hear your child
43:41
you will you will stop that behavior a
43:44
lot
43:45
of the time and it will stop them from
43:47
growing up to be narcissistic
43:49
it'll stop them from being you know
43:51
meeting so much attention
43:53
that you know they can't get a good
43:54
relationship they can't get a good job
43:56
because everything's you know it's about
43:58
me
43:58
me me it's so valuable to give your
44:02
child
44:03
time and to listen yeah and the fact
44:06
that
44:06
they know what true presence feels like
44:10
it's not just being having them in front
44:12
of you and looking around or looking
44:14
away while they're telling you the story
44:16
or whatever
44:17
it's the eye contact it's the presence
44:19
they can feel your presence in your body
44:22
and they know they can see behind your
44:24
eyes if you're thinking about other
44:25
things and you're not really listening
44:26
to what that
44:27
so I think that's extraordinarily
44:29
important good one
44:30
so I'd say my last tip goes back to I
44:33
kind of smushed my tips together
44:36
allowing them the freedom to be
44:38
themselves because they are souls that
44:40
came to the planet with their own
44:42
purpose and their own mission
44:44
they're not here to fulfill the wishes
44:46
and the dreams and the desires that we
44:48
didn't get to fulfill
44:51
and so part of that is watching for
44:53
their prompts it's what we were talking
44:54
about earlier right
44:56
is that kind of the the old paradigm
44:58
parenting from my perspective
45:00
is the putting in this let me tell you
45:02
how you're going to be and what you're
45:03
going to do and how you're going to do
45:05
it
45:05
but instead opening and inviting
45:08
them to show you where their passions
45:12
are because we are programmed
45:14
we are pre-programmed coming to the
45:16
planet with our passions which tells us
45:19
what direction to go
45:20
and so old paradigms mean you can't be
45:22
an artist you'll be a starving artist
45:24
well you know what if that's what your
45:26
heart wants to be then open up that
45:28
pathway and if they're going to starve
45:30
let them have the experience
45:32
of what it is to starve so they can
45:33
decide whether that path is worth it for
45:35
them or not
45:36
and so it's really important not to try
45:39
to live vicariously through your
45:40
children
45:41
and try to set them up because they're
45:44
there to fulfill
45:45
or to be reflections of who you are and
45:48
how wonderful you are
45:50
and what a good parent you are it's not
45:52
about you
45:53
parenting is a sacrifice and that
45:56
requires us to be in that space
45:58
and help nurture pull out and nurture
46:01
what is natural in them so that they
46:04
have a natural pathway to what they need
46:08
to be
46:08
and what they need to do in their life
46:10
and I think that's just really really
46:12
important that's beaut that's true that
46:13
is so very very very true absolutely
46:16
and you get to reflect it back to them
46:18
when they forget
46:20
because they will forget do we tend to
46:24
forget what our natural gifts are
46:25
and our passions and so as a parent I
46:28
think that's another one of our
46:30
responsibilities
46:31
is to acknowledge them and
46:34
nurture them by saying you're a kind
46:37
person I mean you're uh you're a leader
46:39
you know people are always looking up to
46:40
you to be a role model
46:43
remember when you were five I mean now
46:45
that you're seven
46:46
remember when you were five how you
46:47
looked up to the seven-year-olds
46:50
yeah yeah those five-year-olds are
46:52
looking up to you and you're
46:54
teaching the five-year-old how to be a
46:56
seven-year-old and so I would notice
46:58
that he was consciously aware of how he
47:01
behaved in front of other kids and
47:02
interacted with the young kids
47:05
as as a leader because I nurtured that
47:07
in him I saw that I saw he was kind of a
47:09
peacemaker
47:10
kind of kid you know play groups and
47:12
stuff didn't want
47:13
anybody to argue over a toy or anything
47:15
and so
47:16
when he was going through high school in
47:19
picking classes and then
47:21
college I was able to reflect back to
47:24
him
47:25
some of the strengths and interests that
47:27
I saw that he had
47:29
when he was when he was younger
47:32
helped guide him because he's like I
47:33
don't know what I want to do and so
47:35
Alecia that's an awesome awesome tip to
47:38
nurture the gifts to acknowledge them to
47:40
have that awareness again that's what
47:42
we're talking about
47:43
conscious parenting is all about the
47:45
awareness
47:46
and really when we're acknowledging them
47:49
and we're validating them
47:51
the doing the things that they're able
47:53
to do
47:54
that's fine you're a good athlete this
47:56
and that the other thing but it's key of
47:58
what you said of saying you're kind
48:00
it's their being that we really need to
48:04
be reflecting
48:05
because that's their character that's
48:07
the most important thing
48:09
of how they walk in the world and
48:11
sometimes the doing can go away
48:13
sometimes you can get injured and not be
48:14
a good football player anymore
48:16
and so we need to be nurturing their
48:18
being their essence
48:20
and I think that's a really good point
48:23
kindness
48:24
that's a big point and so do you have
48:26
another one
48:27
Angel well it's kind of piggybacking on
48:30
what we're talking about here
48:32
and that is having the awareness
48:35
of of not only their their natural gifts
48:39
their natural talents and all that but
48:42
also having the awareness of when
48:43
they're
48:45
not in a good place and
48:48
really uh being present for them then
48:51
and allowing them to have that pity
48:54
party
48:55
it's okay we all have had the pity party
48:58
the problem with the pity party is if
49:00
you let it go on too
49:01
long it be you know it can become a way
49:04
of life
49:06
complaining and comparing and jealousy
49:08
and
49:09
poor me and the victim and and you you
49:11
adopt
49:12
this victim mindset and so be
49:15
aware when your kids are having a pity
49:16
party about something what I've helped
49:19
nick with uh as a mom but it's it's
49:22
through my own
49:23
practice is is to help him manage his
49:25
energy
49:27
and put a time limp limit on the pity
49:30
party
49:31
it's okay but you know what do you like
49:33
feeling this way
49:35
no okay what do you say seven o'clock
49:39
enough enough time to to feel like this
49:42
and then just
49:44
flip the switch you know okay
49:47
yeah and what's so beautiful about that
49:50
too
49:51
and what we have to remember as parents
49:52
Angel what you're saying is so great
49:54
is sometimes it feels like we're always
49:56
doing for our kids like this like
49:57
consciously
49:58
doing parenting but that allows nick
50:02
to be able to come to you and say mom
50:05
how long are you going to feel this way
50:06
are you okay
50:07
right so if you get a friend back that's
50:10
what your what you said makes me think
50:13
is
50:14
uh they'll be able to give that back to
50:17
you
50:17
and that's an amazing gift
50:21
so true because we're all right now
50:23
going through
50:24
our own stuff we've you know being
50:26
quarantined together
50:28
was was a great opportunity for us to
50:31
see how we're all kind of coping
50:33
with it there were days and
50:36
yeah that nick was my support system
50:38
yeah and I think that's
50:41
that's been a great role model when you
50:42
can show your vulnerabilities
50:44
in such a way wow
50:48
great discussion uh any closing thoughts
50:51
from either one of you
50:52
go ahead Laurie I'm grateful for this
50:55
conversation I'm grateful for um parents
50:58
who are looking for resources during
51:00
this time
51:01
and that for parents to know that
51:03
they're we are only human
51:05
to be human is to air not fail but to
51:09
air
51:09
like I said I think it's about legacy
51:11
just always reminding
51:13
yourself what is your legacy in this
51:15
world especially with your children but
51:17
what do you really want
51:18
emotionally relationship wise with your
51:22
child how do you want that to look it's
51:24
all going to come down to
51:25
what we're talking about here I think I
51:28
would say um
51:29
just more than anything is to embody
51:32
what you expect of your children
51:37
things on them that you're not doing
51:39
it's not the olden days of do as I say
51:42
not as I do
51:43
and I think that's part of conscious
51:45
parenting and then if
51:47
if and when there's something about
51:50
us being an imperfect human that we're
51:53
struggling
51:54
to find our way there to get to what
51:56
we're saying we want them to do
51:59
is to go ahead and admit that and say
52:00
look I know that I'm telling you this
52:03
but you need to know I'm working my way
52:05
towards that I haven't mastered it yet
52:08
but you know we set up we set a high bar
52:11
and
52:11
so it's admitting it's going back again
52:13
admitting what you're not
52:15
and just making sure that you're really
52:17
kind of walking your talk and not giving
52:19
them different rules
52:20
than what you're willing to live by
52:23
absolutely
52:24
that's great how about you Angel
52:27
well parenting is the greatest form of
52:30
leadership
52:31
there is and uh as a leadership
52:36
development professional I feel like
52:40
that's one of the gifts that I've been
52:42
blessed with is to see the potential in
52:44
people
52:45
I see people as souls I've always seen
52:48
other children
52:49
as souls so parenting is the greatest
52:52
form of leadership that there is we are
52:55
raising the next generation we're
52:56
raising
52:57
the next wave of humanity on this planet
53:00
and how they're gonna
53:01
carry it forward let's have the bigger
53:03
picture of the impact that
53:05
we're making on our children uh this has
53:08
been such an incredible conversation
53:10
wow how I could have used some of this
53:13
stuff
53:15
way back when and I'll just do a quick
53:18
recap of from the notes that I've taken
53:20
Laurie explain why what spiritual
53:23
parenting is why it's so important
53:25
and and that is really
53:28
having that emotional connection with
53:30
our children
53:32
and Laurie went through the you did a
53:34
beautiful job Laurie explaining the
53:36
five natural emotions and just how
53:39
important it
53:40
is to stand the healthy version of those
53:42
emotions
53:43
and that's really our job to to guide
53:46
and shepherd our
53:47
our children uh to be emotionally
53:50
intelligent
53:50
and emotionally healthy beings what a
53:53
great message to kick off the
53:54
conversation
53:56
and then we did our enlightening round
53:58
and we threw in
53:59
a couple of tips that we've learned
54:01
along the way
54:02
as conscious parents
54:06
that we strive to be in raising some
54:08
pretty good kids I think
54:10
it seems like if we're gonna create a
54:12
checklist
54:13
it's um let them make their choices
54:16
listening to them
54:17
really you know being present and see
54:19
them for who they are Alecia
54:21
you uh made the great point of
54:24
allowing them the freedom to be
54:26
themselves and not
54:28
and to be aware of your own shift you
54:30
also
54:31
made the very important point of
54:33
nurturing their gifts
54:35
and their passions and
54:38
embodying what you expect and I added to
54:42
to your incredible tips ladies by saying
54:46
do your best to say yes more than no
54:49
there's enough doubt and fear in the
54:51
world let's build our children up
54:53
yes it's a very powerful powerful word
54:55
noah is powerful too when you're talking
54:56
about boundary setting
54:58
we'll get into that some other day check
54:59
out our boundaries videos
55:03
and then teaching them to manage their
55:04
own energy and manage their emotions
55:06
and um that they do have a switch that
55:08
they can make the choice
55:10
have those pity parties we're going
55:13
through a lot of change right now
55:14
and there is a grieving period within
55:18
all of us
55:18
that we need to be allowed time to
55:20
process and so
55:23
but don't let it rule you've got to have
55:25
some time for fun and happiness too you
55:26
gotta
55:27
balance it all out so
55:32
wow this was absolutely amazing
55:35
thank you thank you thank you more time
55:38
Laurie
55:39
and joining us on uh
55:43
chicks talking shift I'm honored and and
55:46
it was my pleasure and
55:47
um you guys have a wonderful show so
55:50
I'm really honored to be part of it yeah
55:54
thank you you can learn more about
55:56
Laurie again by visiting
55:57
the pureintuitive.com you can learn more
56:01
about her books there as well and
56:04
the conversations with god family
56:07
enrichment program
56:09
which can be found on cwg.org check
56:12
that out as well so Alecia
56:16
what do you want to share with our
56:17
audience it's been a great show
56:20
I've so enjoyed this we're going to have
56:22
to do it again sometime
56:24
so I just ask hey if you like what you
56:27
hear
56:27
give us a thumbs up down below and hit
56:31
the bell and subscribe if you haven't
56:33
done that already
56:34
and yeah thumbs up right Angel
56:37
two thumbs up yeah
56:39
[Laughter]
56:43
yeah and like we always say hey head up
56:46
wings out
56:47
keep on flying yeah love it love it
56:50
engage with us on our facebook page we
56:53
would love to get some
56:54
conversations going and hear your
56:57
thoughts
56:57
share your thoughts all right till we
57:00
meet again everybody just
57:02
be your best self that's all we can do
57:04
right now
57:06
all right bye bye
57:10
bye
57:13
[Applause]
57:14
[Music]
57:24
[Music]
57:30
[Music]
57:38
this is just making me so giddy jake's
57:41
talking shift looks fabulous
57:43
they are it's a shift show baby
57:51
this my set look different I think it's
57:55
your chair is a little bit my set is my
57:58
kitchen
58:03
we're taking this a little too seriously
58:08
what are you talking about
58:22
and so it is namaste
58:25
thank you that was lovely yeah
58:29
I feel better I was gonna like going
58:31
honey I was all over the place
58:45
[Laughter]
58:48
love is an experience
58:52
of infinity
58:55
bob love oh what
59:02
bob
59:06
love say it again now that I know that
59:08
it's not bob
59:10
it's finity bob you've heard me and
59:18
finney or he drives infinity
59:20
one or the other
59:24
well what all right I'll get to it
59:41
have you heard of it
59:44
it's an experience of infinity
59:47
oh god absolutely it's in our dna
59:51
I totally believe that and science is
59:54
starting to prove that
59:55
oh good see
60:04
[Laughter]
60:11
that's what we love about you though
60:12
Laurie because weird comes to you
60:15
and we should we like weird
60:19
we do we'll drink it yeah
60:23
yeah okay
60:40
maybe it was a mole
60:43
just anybody I meet and so um
60:50
I can't go a show without forgetting
61:06
it's hormones and for me post-menopause
61:10
I'm like what
61:16
oh well heck um
61:20
laughter I was thinking maybe I should
61:22
that over there
61:24
like I don't drink that alcohol it's
61:26
been there for years for like just for
61:28
looks but I'm thinking that might not be
61:30
a good look for parenting
61:32
and the book I just realized says 50
61:34
shades of chicken or something like that
61:36
it's like all these ways to like nasty
61:37
ways to cook your chicken
61:39
I have that book you do yeah a
61:42
girlfriend gave it to me
61:43
yeah so maybe I should move those things
61:45
do you think
61:49
I don't know I kind of think that that
61:52
uh
61:53
drinking is necessary I just want people
61:55
to think like
61:56
she looks like she's enough she's got 50
61:59
shades of chicken back there
62:01
who isn't drinking these days absolutely
62:07
people noticed that in the background
62:08
and wouldn't surprise me at all if
62:10
somebody said she's got that book 50
62:12
shade of chicken back there yeah I know
62:13
so I'm going to move it really fast
62:15
well I don't know I think it's kind of
62:17
edgy it's kind of chicks talking
62:18
shift-ish okay
62:22
[Applause]
62:22
[Music]


Intro
Introduction to Laurie Farley
Why spiritual parenting is important
Admit your mistakes
Envy vs jealousy - what's the difference?
The 5 Natural Emotions
Failure
Family Enrichment Kit
Teach self-evaluation and choice-making
We're guidance counselors to teens
Be aware of unconscious social pressures
Windows of opportunity open only briefly
Say yes more than no
Ask kids about consequences to their actions
Listen to your child with presence
Allow children to be themselves
Acknowledge their be-ing as much as their do-ing
Managing pity parties
Embody what you teach your kids
Admit your parenting vulnerabilities & mistakes
Parenting is the highest form of leadership
Recap