Cultural Curriculum Chat with Jebeh Edmunds

Season 6 Episode #20 The Role of Allies in Creating Inclusive Environments

• Jebeh Edmunds • Season 6 • Episode 20

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Unlock the secrets to becoming a true ally and transforming your environment into an inclusive haven with this episode of the Cultural Curriculum Chat. Jebeh Edmunds guides you through the intricate journey of allyship, emphasizing the need to move from passive support to active engagement. This isn't just about standing on the sidelines; it's a call to action for those ready to use their privilege to uplift marginalized voices. Discover actionable steps like active listening, speaking up responsibly, and self-education that go beyond mere words, as we dissect the essence of meaningful allyship and the pitfalls of performative gestures.

Journey further into the world of diversity, equity, inclusion, and belonging as we unveil strategies that have revolutionized workplaces across 80 organizations. Through Jebeh's extensive expertise in cultural competency, learn how these transformative initiatives can reshape office dynamics and foster an environment where everyone feels acknowledged and valued. We invite you to explore the robust on-demand resources at www.jebehedmunds.com for a deeper dive into these subjects. Whether you're looking to make a significant impact in your professional sphere or seeking personal growth in allyship, this episode is your roadmap to creating a more inclusive world. Join us for insights that promise to inspire and educate.

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Speaker 1:

Hello everyone, welcome back to the Cultural Curriculum Chat podcast. I'm your host, jeba Edmonds, and today we're diving into a topic that's close to my heart and crucial for building a better world together. The power of allyship is creating truly inclusive spaces, holding those brave spaces for those that are in underrepresented groups and marginalized communities. But before we jump in, be sure to hit that subscribe button and share this podcast episode with someone you know who really needs some guidance of what to do when it comes to being that authentic ally. Trust me, you don't want to miss our content for today. What exactly is an ally? Okay, I'm not just someone who is not racist quote unquote or not homophobic, quote unquote. An ally is an active force for change. This is not a bystander. This is not someone that is for you but will text you underneath the table to say, oh, I can't believe that happened. This is the person that stands up. Their voice may shake, they may have sweaty palms, but they did it anyway. They may be that disruptor to say not, okay, stop that. Or are you okay, jeb? Are you here? Do you need to vent or do you need action? That is the ally that we're talking about. Okay, that active force for change. They're the person who speaks up when they witness discrimination. When they witness discrimination, they are the person who educates themselves about other people's experiences. Let's hear that again. They educate themselves about other people's experiences. They're not the ones that go teach me, educate me, I want to know. No, they do the work, they research, they do the things, and they're also the ones who use their privilege to amplify those marginalized voices. We're not talking about those that want to insert themselves. That's not the privilege that we're talking about of amplifying. They're the ones that use their privilege to amplify those voices. They're the ones that chime in and go oh Jeb, what did you mean? Can you share more about that? Or how come Jeb isn't invited into this project? How come we always seem to not include Jeb when it comes to functions in our community? Why is that? Those are the ones that come in and ask those questions and won't do anything until things start moving. Now I know what some of you might be thinking. You know, oh, I'm just one person, jeb. You know how much of a difference can I really, truly make? Right? Trust me, the impact of allyship is huge. Okay, let me break it down with some key actions that you can use to be that effective ally.

Speaker 1:

I always say this active listening, number one. Active listening, listen and then you learn, right? Here's my little quip. You know, you've heard that online. Oh, we listen and we don't judge, right? Well, let's scratch that and let's do. We listen and we learn. Yeah, I should trademark that. I'm just going to say that Just kidding. But we listen and we learn.

Speaker 1:

This means you're actively seeking out those diverse perspectives. You're open to the feedback that they give you. Right, even when it's uncomfortable. If I check somebody for doing something wrong, yeah, I'm giving you feedback. You need to take that. And if I care enough to give you feedback, that means I want you not to do the same thing that you've been doing. So we listen and we learn. That's first and foremost.

Speaker 1:

Second thing I want you to speak up, don't speak over, don't speak over me. I can speak for myself, right, use your voice to call out discrimination, but I really want you to speak up, not speak over, and take over this time that I have and drown out my voice when I feel that harm has been done towards me, all right. So, speaking up, but don't speak over. Educate yourself and others Now, don't rely on people from marginalized groups to teach you and give you all of the resources. No, no, no, no, no, no, no. You do the work by understanding that people from different marginalized groups, and even within those marginalized groups, search intersectionality. You'll thank me later. They are all different human beings as well, so they also have different experiences and they share that knowledge. So, again, doing the work, listening to podcasts from people from marginalized voices, reading books written by marginalized voices that will help you educate yourself, taking meaningful action.

Speaker 1:

Allyship isn't just words. You know that to me, can be. You know, just a small minutia of the overall experience of being an ally. It's about the concrete steps to create change, whether that's at work, at school or even in your community. You know, when you see something going on that's discriminatory, say something. Don't just look shocked and stunned. Of course, we always have that first initial reaction, but then we have to say something. Oh, my goodness, that made me uncomfortable. I can only imagine how Jeb is feeling right now. Jeb, are you okay? Looking at me, do you need help, even if you don't know me by my name? Just saying are you okay, do you need help? You got this Okay, just checking in. That's all we could do, and that, I think, goes a long way to say that I see you, but I want you to tell me in that sense of how can I help you in this time. So that's something I think is really, really important.

Speaker 1:

Aha, that's the key word today, folks performative allyship. We all see it, we all know it, we all see the icons, we all see the little buttons or the little. We wear blue tomorrow kind of a thing, but we're not really going to do anything about it. That's performative allyship. That's just an example. I just picked a random color, blue, so don't come for me, okay. So this is when you are more concerned about appearing that you're an ally rather than actually being the ally. Does that make sense? You want to be for everybody, so everybody can see that you're with a cause, but you're not actually doing it. And a good example. You know, I'm recording this in February, during Black History Month. I'm recording this in February, during Black History Month and with the rollback of these major corporations in DEI, a lot of people have been saying, oh, we need to boycott and do things, and that's wonderful, but again that performative space is using your platform and shouting out and saying yep and liking videos and stuff, but actually doing the work. That's when you get that movement going, and so that's what it means when it comes to performative allyship.

Speaker 1:

The savior complex is another thing that is a pitfall when it comes to allyship work Remembering that you don't have to rescue anyone. You're here to support and amplify, and that's what that entails. You don't come in to feel that, oh, I don't want to seem like I'm the white superhero or this group superhero. For you. It's like no, I can rescue myself, but I want to make sure that you are here with me, alongside me. You also heard that comment, you also heard that joke. So, therefore, you're not rescuing me, but you are affirming that what harm has been done has been done, and to have my back is to actually say, jeb, this isn't right. No, it's not right. How are we going to respond, jeb? How do you want us to handle this, jeb? And I'll tell you and we'll go from there. But again, you know I can save myself, but I need my group with me to walk in this movement, because there is power in numbers Getting defensive, you know, when called out, listening and reflecting instead of becoming defensive.

Speaker 1:

There's so many things. When we're trying to be that ally for someone and they're telling you how to move, you might feel a little defensive, you might be like why even bother? You know, I feel like I got chewed out for trying to do something or hearing that well, jeb, my intentions were there, I have high intentions, but the impact was really gone downhill. So when you're having those courageous conversations with that friend in that marginalized group, ask for feedback a few days after what has happened. Let them process, let yourself process and self-reflect. Sometimes solutions don't happen right in that moment and that also will continue to be a constant muscle that you need to tend and work on and continue to work through. There's no way to feel getting defensive. That is just counterproductive. It does not help with anything. So take your feedback with grace and knowing that if you want to do this work, there's going to be some hard conversations. There's going to be that friend that might say you know, I didn't need you to step into that, I had it. I'll let you know. If I need backup, you know. Thanks again, but I'll let you know how I move and how I work and you need to really respect that person's voice.

Speaker 1:

So some really cool examples of being that authentic ally is. You know, looking at the programs that you have in place at work. If there's like a mentorship program and there's underrepresented groups, you know that are being featured. Look at the data and see how many have we increased in our hiring with this mentorship program. And looking and auditing why we haven't made much movement where we should be. Have those SMART goals written out to see how we can measure that hiring practice when it comes to working in a mentorship program at work. You know what is working, what isn't working, how can we tweak and change. Those are the types of things that we could do.

Speaker 1:

An impactful ally listens to the feedback. An impactful ally asks those questions why aren't we including this person and why should they not be in this room? Have those tough conversations. Gone are the days and I know a lot of us we don't like confrontation. I get that, but we're grownups and conflict is natural. You know we're going to have conflict. You cannot ignore conflict. That just festers for more negativity, and so having those tough conversations I call those courageous conversations is a must.

Speaker 1:

You need to get over the fact what if I make a mistake? That's the biggest thing I hear from my clients when I work in this field with trainings but Jeb, what if I make a mistake? And I say you will? We always mess up. We mess up sometimes. You just have to be comfortable with the fact that you messed up. You will make a mistake. That is a human experience, and the key to that is you need to listen again, listen and learn, apologize sincerely and then repair the harm. That's another big thing I want you to think about is repairing the hurt. It's not we'll take it on the chin per se and do better next time and dust ourselves off. You listen, you learn, you apologize sincerely and then you repair. Another question I hear a lot when I'm working in the field is I'm afraid I'm going to say the wrong thing. You will again, it will happen.

Speaker 1:

There's an old saying there's a reason why we have one mouth and two ears right. We listen more than we should speak, and that's something we should continue to do right Listening first before you speak, pause, reflect and then act. So when you do speak up, it comes from a place of integrity. It comes from a place of genuine curiosity and openness to learn. Another pitfall that some of us might fall into is I don't have the time to commit to this work. It's really hard, jeb, to be that ally. That's a mindset that we need to stop. It's not a priority. I've got so much going on.

Speaker 1:

Well, the time is now. You know, starting small, integrating this in your daily life, going out into the community, where our marginalized people and groups exist we exist in all facets, everywhere, and so having those authentic relationships is building your allyship, again, not for the sake of doing it, but just to do it. You know, going out there and being in the environment of others. That's not your typical like-minded bubble, just going out into the environment and meeting people from all facets of life. I want you to think about how we listen and we learn actively. Listen and learn.

Speaker 1:

Speaking up, don't speak over. Speak up, don't speak over somebody. Educate yourself, and then you share that knowledge with others, preferably from the same cultural group that you belong to, so they also have that information. Taking that meaningful action. You know what can I do, jeb, to best support you. So, when times arise, I know how you would like me to navigate with you. That is really good.

Speaker 1:

Avoid the pitfalls of performative allyship okay, and avoid that savior complex. You're not rescuing me. You're helping me in the sense of being my backup. Friend and my backup. I'm the one that is in charge of my walk and my path. Okay, and again, don't get defensive. You cannot get defensive when you're getting feedback from that person that is in that group. You need to make sure that when they tell you something, you take a piece of your humble pie and you get back and you apologize sincerely and you repair Listen, apologize, repair and I really hope this podcast episode was helpful for you.

Speaker 1:

I wanted to give you some quick tips, actionable strategies that aren't overwhelming. I have a wonderful training course online on my website right now at jebaedmondscom. There are lots of mini training courses there that you and your staff can partake in. It's for educators, it's for leaders in the corporate world, it is for anyone who wants to know better and do better, with a lot of benefits in terms of understanding key terms, the role of being an active ally, how to have those courageous conversations, equity advocacy and so many more. And guess what? There's a bonus you will have two private one-hour coaching sessions with me, jebe, the creator and facilitator.

Speaker 1:

I have used these courses in the 80 organizations I have worked with these last five years. They are proven, they are very well received and recognized. These companies that have used this work have had many transformational results in getting their staff to a more inclusive environment. And it's right there on demand, right at your fingertips etncecom, and there's more info that I will have for you in the show notes, and we will continue to do this work. I will continue to share my wealth of knowledge and expertise in diversity, equity, inclusion and belonging, and cultural competency and proficiency for you all. So be sure to find out more of my work on my website and I cannot wait to share with you more insights and strategies to keep you going and making that positive impact that I know you possess. Thanks again, so very much, and I will see you here same time next week. Bye-bye.