EP18: Rob Cook: Laughter Happens in the Moment

Rob Cook takes us on an epic journey through his life, from being born and raised in the housing projects of Birmingham, Alabama, to 21 years of active duty service in the military, to moving to L.A. and becoming a transformational life coach. 

He humbly shares about transitioning from living like he thought he should, to living as a man can -- as a person in touch with their essential nature. Rob takes pages from his past professions to help inform the myriad of offerings he brings to the table today. While many have told him he needs to focus his professional energy in one arena, he has thrived by not limiting himself to one offering and seeing how several teachings and avenues can connect with each other. For example, why focus solely on mindset coaching when he can do that as well in fitness training? He sees how the two are perfectly married. And when helping companies grow their business, he draws upon lessons learned in the military, such as team dynamics, collaboration, and leadership. 

Rob is a force to be reckoned with! And the love he shares with his partner Laurie is inspiring. The way he talks about their relationship, and what he has learned from her, brings laughter and tears. 

Don't miss Rob's epic keys to success, which include "moving often" and "laughing a lot." We are much the wiser after getting to speak with Rob Cook!

This episode explores:

• Breaking rules that don't line up with our essential nature
• Who am I?
• Laughter happens in the moment 
• Not having to act like a man -- I am a man.
• The understanding that changed "every aspect" of Rob's life
• Military as a microcosm of society -- we're all people first.
• Letting go of the ego's grip.
• Accepting others for who they are
• Try to get each moment right, not all of it right.
• Partners that change our lives.

Rob Cook is a Mindset Coach and creator of the unFIT brand. He works with clients to unlock the benefits of total health so they may thrive in any area of their life.  He also is the host of the 3PGC’s podcast titled “We’re Listening” -- a community where all voices are heard. 
He became a certified life coach through Supercoach Academy, discovering an ideal balance between the mental and physical realms in his work as a coach. As the founder of unFIT, he offers a fresh approach to Unlocking Your Health From the Inside/Out through coaching, training, workshops, and speaking events for start-ups, non-profit organizations, Fortune 500 companies, and everything in between.

Angus & Rohini Ross are “The Rewilders.” They love working with couples and helping them to reduce conflict and discord in their relationships. They co-facilitate individualized couples' intensives that rewild relationships back to their natural state of love. Rohini is the author of the ebook Marriage, and they are co-founders of The 29-Day Rewilding Experience and The Rewilding Community. You can also follow Angus and Rohini Ross on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram. To learn more about their work visit: therewilders.org.

Episode 18 features the music of RhythmPharm with Los Angeles-based composer Greg Ellis.

Transcript

Rohini Ross: 0:02

Well, Angus and I are so thrilled to have you with us, Rob. Thank you for joining us on the rewilding love podcast and even for listening in. And Rob is a mindset coach. He's the founder of the brand Unfit. And he's also the host of the three PGC podcast We're listening, so we look forward to learning more about all of those things today.

Rob: 0:36

Thank you for having me.

Rohini Ross: 0:38

Yeah, it's great. So in terms of what Angus and I would love to explore today, we'd love to get to know you more. I know that you know, you've had me on your podcast, I've got to know you a little bit. But we'd really love to hear more about your background. You've had such an interesting journey. And I think we can we have the time to start wherever you'd like to start and go back as far as you'd like to go back to so wherever you'd like to begin, we could start at day one.

Rob: 1:06

That is so funny, because that's how I started my episode that just released with Derrick Mason was like, Man, you're so interested wherever you want to start, if you want to go all the way back to I was born. Oh, we can like I'm waiting. Yeah. No, I do have a question, though. Yeah. Is the music playing before I start talking? Or because the the rewilding theme music? Is my I want to know when does it play? Is it already played at this time already? Play already played? Okay. So I want to channel that vibe. Yeah. But no, I guess we can start with simply I was born in Birmingham, Alabama, grew up in a very poverty stricken area. rhetoric, gangs and violence, as most inner cities are. And I grew up with this understanding, I wasn't going to make it so far, in this lifestyle. And I knew I wanted out, I just didn't know how that would happen. So I channeled my energy at that time or my mind at that time to playing sports, because the only people around me who had an opportunity to get out were playing sports, and they were becoming collegiate athletes, and they could get away. Even if only an hour down the road. That was a big thing to us, and the scholarships and things and then work as I proceeds and life kind of thrown me toward Uncle Sam, it was pretty funny, because getting there with all kinds of different beliefs about how the world operated, it didn't take but six weeks before I was hugging other white guys, or you know, just like prom, I gotta go you my brother, you know, because that's how the military training works. And, and then it became a 21 years of, of just, I don't even know the word to explain it life. Going through my first couple years of always getting in trouble, and not realizing that I was always in trouble at home. And these were two different environments, two different two different sets of basically just two different environments that I was the only common denominator between the two. And I had a very good mentor at the time. Tell me if you wanted to stay strict. You should have stayed there. Why did you come here. And that kind of shocked me enough to say what teach me how to play the game. And he told me how smart I could be and the potential I could have. And it reminded me of my aunts always telling me that as much trouble as I'd ever gotten into, that never had anything negative say about me, suspended from school, they just told me I was misusing my energy. They just always channeled it to a different light. And I kind of felt bad again. And so I dove in. And the next I say after year five, the next 16 was one heck of a ride. I was a protection agent. So I protected people places and things. I started with high value dollar aircraft that were spotted planes and things like that the YouTube j stars, things like that. Then it went on to places. So nuclear sites, high value dollar operation buildings, or intelligence buildings. And doing well in those I became an instructor for a while and got the opportunity to start with people. So every government agency protects its own. So as you see Secret Service protects the president. DOD has protection teams that protect their assets, four star generals, and an amazing opportunity to go to the Pentagon and protect the highest ranking officer in the airforce and the secretary at Air Force. And it was just a totally different way of life at the Pentagon. You haven't been in the military. I don't want to say that because I don't want to diminish what those guys but it's it's a difference worl when you get to the Pentagon because it's all strategic, it's war fighting happening, but no guns are being shot. It's all happening at the battle, the planning that and it was just like whoa. And from there did well enough to get selected to go down to Special Operations into it. Which was whiplash in itself, because conventional Air Force did things one way and I really thought I was at the top of the spear. But we were what they would call pretty boys. Because we were the suits and I had a shoulder holster with my initials on it, like we did protection like that. But in Special Ops, you are you are you are like North Face guaran boots, and you have weapons on your ankle. Yeah, knobs. And you have it was a different way of life. It was like, whoa. But watching how special operations do things was just like, like so mind boggling. Because conventionally you plan for the attack, especially a lot, you respond to the attack. The planning is on building your skill set. So you're always fighting, you're always driving, you're always shooting. Why? Because you're just going to be able to react because none of us really know what's happening. If we really knew who stopped 911, like I said, I was, you know, it was it was a switch, I didn't understand it at the time, how it played into the principles and understanding really, that's the way we live life responding. But it was one heck of a whiplash. Final deployment was my closest brush with death. And that's when the writing on the wall start happening over the unraveling of something I had bound so tight. I remember coming home and my ex wife, or my wife at the time, was hiding my weapons. The kids were kind of not telling me what was happening so much with school bullies because I would overreact I would bring so much aggression to the table on it. I noticed I didn't really have many friends unless it was highly charged as I was. And I didn't just start it like seeing death didn't move me. It Like It was it was almost like a straight A just a just a flatline. It is a flat, I was alive. But everything was flatline. Because you this is the way you deal with all that's going on around you. And, and then things just started collapsing. I started drinking, started partying, I started messing up at work. And it just all culminated in probably some of the darkest days of my life, around 2014 and 15 2016. I'm at the point where I'm at close to 20 years, but I'm in trouble, you know, for for my lack of understanding. And I'm faced with the challenge of what to do. And the military is in a position where they're ready to strip me of everything I've so called work for that created my identity, and then me thinking what was I going to do then? And the funny thing is, when I finally let go, they let go and gave me opportunity to continue service. And I was like No, I'm good now. Because I'd understood at that point. The military wasn't my identity. I didn't I didn't know it, but I can't find it feel it was something else. And so I retired I moved out to Los Angeles, with Laurie my life partner now. And she I remember her saying when I was going through all this was like, I'll give you a place to stay for you to get your mind right. Just because you know, once your mind is right, you're going to do whatever you want to do. And so I was like No, I've never been on the west coast. I wouldn't like it. She said Well listen, just 30 days, three months. Try it. If you don't you're right you can go right back and I remember the way she said it she said you can go right back to the current environment. And I was like, okay, and I call my dad I was like, Hey, you know I'm retired you know all this stuff. I'm gonna put my stuff in a pot and we'll go out here um, you know, the pot is the transitional versus putting it in storage like not that I don't need it in long term storage. Put it in the pot I'm not gonna be long and three months after being out here I was Hey, you can you can find a job to pot I'm not coming back from California now. Yeah. The if the weather alone, you know. But from from 2016 was a was the beginning of the search of finding. Who am I? I'm not the thug. I'm not the the angry black man. I'm not the racist from Alabama. I'm not the the war hero and I'm just a veteran. I'm a honorably retired veteran, but Just a veteran now, I'm not a special ops superhero. Now, I'm not a shooter. I'm not a leader. I'm not Who the hell am I. And that was around the time I met Michael Neill. And so a lot of people love our first interaction, because that was my thing of the principles. But I realized I was already on the ledge. Like I was already on the ledge, and he said, We met at a dinner party, we had a mutual friend. And he, later on, he invited me in and it clicked. And it was like a movie of the Transformers coming together, where every part of fragmentation of my life that I compartmentalize this box, and this box and this box, it was like, they had all open it, it all came together. And I realized, wait, well, if I don't have to be angry and mad and upset about all that stuff, can I use it? Because it's good shit, you know, is what I was gonna think, like, Can I use it? And it was a year and a half of working through that with Michael and programming and programming, but programs, learning and standing in a conversation to the realization of finding my voice. And, and I think that happened probably around 2018, about 2018 when I realized, I love me. I love me. And then that started me now into, okay, well, how do I love the world. And so I create it on fit. Because I was like, the only way I got here was not trying to fit in any model that someone has set for me. So whenever I would talk about race relations prior to just just George Floyd, I brought I brought the anger of 400 years of slavery, I brought the anger of the civil rights movement, I brought the anger of Selma, Alabama, and the brick I brought all of that to the conversation was a No wonder it never got over. So I wonder who's going to hear that. Nobody's going to hear when I'm bringing that much fire to the table. And so that that kind of has been it. You know, it's it's just been learning different ways to continue losing my biases, my prejudices, my getting more educated about people in general. Like the she heard on your thing, I remember I told you, when I saw it, I was like, What is that and I started looking, and I was like, I need to understand that. Because if I can go in more and find another place, not to have a spot of ignorance, to be able to connect more and show love, that's why I want to be like, and so that's, that's it. That's why that's the rod I've been on. And it's so fun. It's so like, fulfilling this this concept. It's not even a concept, the truth of unconditional love. Like I'm slowing life down enough to see, I get to choose, I get to choose. And I'm yet to have chose love. And not felt right in the end of it. Doesn't mean I've always chosen her. Right. But I know the record stands it's the most undefeated fighter ever, you know, love stand, but I don't always choose it. I go in there and I thought about every now and then and lose, you know, but I learned in loser. I'll come back to it as zero from from 77 to 21.

Rohini Ross: 13:54

You did an amazing job of summarizing that. And are you kidding? Okay, if we kind of zoom in a little bit into because oh, it's an incredible arc and journey and so much in there. And and what I hear is that that thread of waking up throughout waking up to love throughout in a sense. And and the love that your aunt's showed you when they saw the positive in you, even when you were messing up at school or getting into trouble that they could see that there was good, wanting to come through you but it was just getting expressed in these ways that weren't really serving you. And so I'm curious in terms of your your Air Force experience. What would you say the main things are that you learn from that going through all of those different levels within it.

Rob: 14:45

We're all human. Because the military is a microcosm of society. People come in from all different backgrounds, all different colors, all different. But we all fight the same fight. It's us versus them. And they get you to believe that and believing that or are seeing that expressed and happen daily is why now, I don't see the need to delineate or put a divider in between us based on the color of our skin based on our religious beliefs, based on all the different things in which we do set boxes for male female. I remember waking up to realizing I'd never hired a female and protection team. Now it was because it was very few of them in it, but I realized because I thought they were the weaker sex and they couldn't basically do this at a higher they're in Oh, shit. You know, like those my girls were and I call them my girls, like I would say, my boys, but they were fired. And I remember having to teach them different. I had to teach them how to fight collectively, not separate, I could teach a guy one on one. But I had to teach them how to move in pairs and move in threes. And if you ever came upon him in training, you would find out like you touch one here they come there like a swarm because that was the way they could all take care of each other. Because if you are in protection, or in any kind of defense about it, a person is looking for what they consider to be the weakest link. So if you choose six, one, this guy or six for this guy, or five, three, her, come on, he's going to choose that. But the way these girls collectively learn how to move as a unit was unbelievable. And they brought so many other gifts to the teams, the the organization just for listening. You know, it was it made us move better. So that was kind of what I learned most in the military was just a series of life experiences with so many different people from so many different places, living overseas experiencing different cultures. Like where Western civilization wasn't the way of life in Japan. It just wasn't the way of life. So you have to understand or adjust or and if you fight, that's a problem if you fight the the what's real, you know. So that was probably the biggest learning in the military was that it is absolutely possible that we can all cohesively move toward a common objective. I've seen it happen. Not saying that I haven't came across racists in the military, one particularly Marine who had a swastika on his stomach. But that was what he but in face of being an American, I knew he would have shot cross my back and protected me with nothing else. I knew he would have pulled me out of fire. Now when we go back to our environments, he probably could never say he knows me. But I know he was he was shoe for my life. So I mean, I know it's possible. Now. That would be what I take most from the military. And what I would drop most is that authoritarian type demeanor. So yeah, that's what I was saying about

Angus Ross: 18:08

what i what i what I'm so blown away by and I'm so thankful to finally get to sort of sit down with you and listen to your story. Is this just a sort of beautiful narrative of coming back into your essential nature? You know, you look at so many sort of elements to society and so many different sort of backdrops to society. And they all kind of have their own rulebook. So sort of growing up in the inner city has its own rulebook on rolling into the military has its own rulebook. And you have to you have to fit into that rulebook everything about those, those environments is about fitting into the rulebook

Rob: 18:51

and repairing the umbrella of religious beliefs to Don't forget about umbrella.

Angus Ross: 19:01

And so often, and I find this so often for people that people that I work with, it's kind of like at some point you start to realize maybe that this rulebook is not lining up with my essential nature it's not loving up with that loving spirit that you know exists within me and and that's where I think people get into difficulty so I just love that you've kind of sort of hopped all these different environments that's probably not a very good way of

Rob: 19:28

you know, it's a very good way is the way I think it This is how I see it now that I did get a chance to move or so called fly from each one I People often say you like a butterfly man. He's just always doing something new always in learning time and fly. So I would consider it

Angus Ross: 19:45

hard but yeah, but slowly but surely over the years, you sort of like, it's like, let's say the cream has come to the surface is the cream is your essential nature that's finally expressing itself. I think it's so beautiful. To think of it in those terms, and these are very sort of, you know, I guess, looking from the outside looking in, they seem like pretty extreme environments like the inner city, the military, very much got this sort of very strong, rulebook, ethos, whatever we're gonna call it. And yet you still the cream came to the top and you found and were able to express that in you know that in a voice through our essential nature. And I just think it's just a such a brilliant story. And kind of sort of, like, shaken off the mold of all those different things as well. It's like, I know that in England, they would there's this expression, I don't know if they use it here in America, you can't take the boy out of that you can take the boy out of projects, he can't take the projects out of them. Yeah, yeah. You've shaken off all those stereotypes. It's like, you're really standing in your true authentic self. I think that's really beautiful. That's what struck me about listening to your story.

Rob: 20:54

It's, it's what I understand now. And and if you would have asked me years ago, I wouldn't have told a story like this because I didn't see the value in it. But the comment about the the you could take the boy out or her but you can't take the hood out of the boy is actually pretty funny. Because just about two months ago, probably about two months ago, I found myself in an argument with my neighbor. And, and Angus, just to be as transparent as possible. What came up my mouth was okay, how about I just beat your ass? How about I just beat yo ass right here in Malibu, California. So you can leave me the fuck alone. And he screams No, just listen to me. And I noticed a few things. One, I was in pajamas. So I don't need to be fine in pajamas. But that was the first thing that I kind of broke the. But it lost that. Wow. I haven't lived in new projects since I was a kid. Why the hell did that come from? Well, it came from the fact that the night before was when I realized my grandmother had COVID and had failed in herself. So all I was thinking about was stories of her raising me in the projects. So that next day when he was angry about something that we've, you know, talked back and forth about for a while, I met it with a totally different energy because of where my mental space was. And I end up laughing and hugging him within the moment like that. Because his name is Mike. He's my neighbor. I'm about to hug you Mark. And he's looking like you're so crazy. Come on, let's talk about this. We sit down and just have a beautiful conversation. But I remember calling my mentor Michael and saying, Hey, man, I messed up. Like, I call and tell you the good stuff. So I'm calling to tell you I messed up and he just laughed. And he was like, No, he's just human. Human. And he was just like, yeah. And so that's why I tell the story because I don't want people to think like, Oh, he's, you know, he came into the principles isn't doing this. And he's doing it so enlightened. Like, no, just two months ago, I was telling somebody I'm gonna beat their as, you know, but just just yesterday, it was an old lady who couldn't find her way. And I asked her to help and at first she looked like, and I'm like, I'll help you get where you need to get. Even though right now this is scare you that I'm a sixth one black man towering over you, as a feeble white young lady moving through the airport. It's like, ah, and sat down had a beautiful conversation. Yeah, yeah, it's, I get the comment in the sense cuz I mean, theoretically, that's what happened. But now I have found a good space moment, right? You know, I stopped trying to get it all right. If I just get each interaction, right, I could do that. But when I try to link these daisy chain these moments together so they could mean I'm a good person, I get thrown very off.

Angus Ross: 24:04

Yeah. And I think that that is so typical. In terms of our human nature, you know, we're kind of I feel like we're, we are almost living between these these these these two minds in a sense, our impersonal mind our personal mind, our essential our essential nature and then just the programming and conditioning. And I for sure fall fall back into old programming conditioning when when I hit a blind spot like you know an angry or or annoying neighbor. But you kind of like you came back you know, you can't can't can't back down to earth pretty quickly by the sound of it.

Rob: 24:43

Or it was instant. Yeah, I won't fight truth anymore. The moment I see it, I'm not a I'm not Oh, give me a week to sort through my thoughts and my feelings and I'm gonna come back around because I was. Once I see it, it's over. Whether that's an apology, whether that's I may have been right But let me figure out a different way of saying it. Let it's the moment I see it. I'm done with trying to hold on to what that was. Because that's obviously got me right here in this mess, so to speak, or this disturbance? Like, let me let me get this. Did I not say that correctly? What vibe? Do you need me to explain this to because I'm trying to communicate? Hmm. I'll meet you wherever you are. I'll come across the tracks. I'll dig a hole out. I'll meet you where you are. I'm not going to ever tell you now because I did. At one point I got I got the answer to help you come over here though. What if I can't move Robert? What if I can't move. So now it's like I'm coming to you where you are. And and I'm gonna share as best I can. And that may mean, you know your frustrations, I get it. Because I was frustrated too, when I was scared in my life. Yeah,

Rohini Ross: 25:51

that's so powerful. And then the other part that I'd love to hear more about, as you describe that click moment that transform a moment when things fell into place. And it's so impactful when that happens to people, it's so impactful when people like you share the experience of that. And so I'd love to know a little bit more about what what was the before that transformer moment like the even the seconds before? What shifted? And then and I know, it's an ongoing journey after that, but what was sort of the shift after that?

Rob: 26:33

Yeah, it was, um, he it Michael had drawn this, this diagram. And he was showing how wisdom was always flowing. Right? Always flooring and how our thinking blocks it. And it just made sense. It just made sense. And he also use memories because we did talk a little bit about PTSD on the about the difference then. If I had been robbed before, and then I get over to you and Angus house after I just been robbed. And I get away and I get to your an Angus house. And I'm explaining to you that a few weeks ago almost got robbed, but I'm crying. I'm scared. I'm nervous. He threw a few metaphors to us, I was able to see how how we allow a memory to bring forth the motions because I'm actually safe sitting on you and Angus`s couch. I'm not in danger. I'm amongst two people who love me. And I'm just sharing and memory. So why would there be a need to bring the fear, the anxiety and the worry back because I wasn't in it. And he made that so clear to me. And that's why I was that's what the year and a half of trying to learn how not to stay in those stay in the emotions of each of these stories. That's why I can freely share them now. Because the stories bear, they're not what's happening. I'm currently in my home in my office right now. I'm not in Birmingham being abused. I'm not doing any drug selling or getting, you know, I'm not being bombed in Iraq anymore. I'm not living a super high intensity life on motorcade driving and things like that I'm not drinking alcohol, just to clear my mind anymore. I'm not going through substance abuse counseling and treatments. Now. I'm sitting in my office talking to you too. So I don't need to bring all of that with it. You know, maybe I'll well up, obviously, you know, sometimes when I think about some, but I don't have to bring all of that to it. And and and that seems to help people hear something in it. Yeah. Yeah.

Rohini Ross: 28:57

Yeah. I mean, that. That healing and that freedom. It sounds like your recognition. Was that, that size, freedom. And since freedom is is basically this is freedom.

Rob: 29:11

Oh, yeah. I'm sorry. Yeah. I'm just thinking we hang in again. Yeah. Okay. Okay, yeah. I wear that for that reason. Yeah. Because the moment I did realize I was free, it was something I never wanted to forget. Yeah. So I bought a bunch of these bracelets, and I wear it everywhere. Whether I'm in a suit and tie or whether I'm in workout clothes or whatever. I'll never, never want to forget I`m free.

Angus Ross: 29:40

Yeah, you know, I was thinking that every now and again, if you know and I do have the opportunity to teach groups and when these groups come new people, and they're new to this understanding every now and again, someone will get the idea that they they basically what they say generally is like Ah, I'm okay. I'm fundamentally okay. And what they're basically saying is like, I'm free. I'm free of that narrative. I'm free of that illusionary thinking and they see that it is an illusion, like you say, it's like, you know, you're not backing our act now sitting on someone's couch, just to suddenly get that sense. Yeah, this is just the stuff that I have created a story around. And it's not happening to me now. But I've just seen that time and time again, where people just fundamentally I will just say, Oh, I'm okay. And I always used to, I would hear that. It's like, I want to taste that. I want to know what they mean. And then I finally I finally now get it. It's like, yeah, they just finally suddenly they feel completely liberated from all of that narrative. And they are okay. I think it's such a beautiful thing.

Rohini Ross: 30:47

Yeah, it's really profound. And, and for everyone listening. What I love about this is how the same understanding that had Angus and I come up with the rewilding metaphor that love can always be rewelded is the same understanding that helps you heal from PTSD, that helps you experience that inner freedom, that it it is applied in so many different areas of life, simply by all of us connecting more with our essential nature and the truth of who we are. And it helps relationships, but it also helps many other areas. And so, Angus, and I would love for you to share a bit more about, you know, now that you've been impacted so profoundly, what are the ways that you're currently helping others?

Rob: 31:41

in relationships, or just in general?

Rohini Ross: 31:44

Yeah, General.

Rob: 31:45

Okay. So when I originally got out of the military, I thought personal training was it, I was going to get people bodies in shape, because if your body feels good, I thought that was it. And when I really sat down is understanding it was well before the body that things needed to happen. And so now I kind of just work with the mindset, and a few things that drive you to this understanding, like eating balance, so that because I know gut health is directly tied to brain functions. So I don't have to teach you the principles. But if I get your gut clear, you will start your own understanding those people I know movement is essential for anything to happen. So move often. That's it. I know, sleep is where recovery and regeneration happens. And we all need to be replenished. So I say Sleep well. I say laugh a lot, because laughter happens in the moment. You can't do laughter in past tense. It happens in the moment. And so that's why I say and I umbrella it all with prioritizing self care to make sure you do those. Never allow yourself to forget to move off and sleep well he balance laugh a lot. If you do that, I don't I don't know what your life will be. But I can almost guarantee it'd be a lot better than what it is now. And that's, that's what I drive. So I do have some personal training clients and people who just want the body. But they typically after a while we like what else kind of programs you got? And what else do you do. And we get into mindset coaching or business building. And it's so funny because I never thought of myself as a business coach, and two businesses start bringing me in. And so just teach that to our employees. Just get them to like each other, get them to vibe as a team, I understand team dynamics on the military. You know, you when you deploy, you bring a fraction of your unit and you connect with the fraction of another unit. And then they drop you in the fight. Well, team dynamics is is imperative for life survival. You know, there's two functions, you have to understand, you know, we are going to form together as a team, they were gonna storm because we don't know our responsibilities. The context hasn't been said, we don't know who's responsible for what. And then we start performing without the after we come out of the storm. And we kind of set the context on how we're going to move as a team. And then everything becomes known. And that's how we move. So understanding that's the cycle you see it you're able to articulate it, you move past it, because we need you all to understand how to defeat this enemy, so to speak. But that's pretty much it. And it just when I let go of it having to be in a one way. I remember people saying Well, you can't do all that. You need to got to be a trainer or you got to be this and you got to be that and that's where the struggle for me was because I was like Why didn't I want to do anything is saying with the host and what we were talking about. On the on the last podcast. I've always loved emceeing parties and, and and being the narrator for functions and things and throwing jokes and getting people laugh. I've done that my whole military career. I remember one time getting in trouble. In my military career where I couldn't do certain things, and the only thing they would let me do was that because that was a benefit to them, you know, and coming out and going to hosting and thinking I wanted to be a host and learning certain things. Again, people were like, Well, you can't host and do this. And so I remember one day, my hosting coach sat me down. And he said, I don't know how to explain this, but you're wasting your money almost in hosting right now in my, my, my process of trying to learn, and he says, because the problem is not what we're teaching you is the problem is I can't get Rob who's backstage on stage. He said, because the raw backstage, everybody loves. He says, but when you get in front of that mic, and then lights come on, you turn to what you think a host is supposed to be. So you start using different words, your mannerisms are very strict, your storyline is direct, you're not feeling you're just you're just and he says that's not going to work. And so I didn't understand it, you know, until coming into it. Now, I was like, Oh, he was basically saying, I was I was trying to project something that wasn't real. So what is the host, a person who communicates, I communicate, that`s it. And so when the opportunity came for the three PGC podcast, of course, I loved it. Because I get to do something that I've one been trained into, I love and I kind of understand the elements of it, to move a conversation, interviewing questions and things like that, because it's kind of you want to get the story out. That's the only way we're doing it right for people to hear the information, take something from it be able to, to move and flourish to thrive. So it's been it's been pretty cool. Breaking down all of those rules. You know, on Monday, I train on Tuesday, I coach Wednesday, I speak Thursday, I might be an emcee at a party. Friday, I'm off. Saturday, I'm teaching a self defense class Sunday. You know, that's, that's my life. Man. I guy um, yeah, I just ride this ride.

Angus Ross: 37:10

It's kind of like breaking down the rules that don't line up with your essential nature. Yeah. I love that. I also really love I never even thought of it in those terms before but so much of this understanding points to the you know, like that beautiful feeling is like in that beautiful feeling will be fertile territory to have an insight. But this idea that laughter is the one thing that puts you in the present moment, once that laughter is the one thing that puts you in touch with that feeling. I never, I never looked at it on those terms. But yeah, you know, if ever there were to be a magic bullet, when people will ask you Well, how do I get to that feeling? How do I get to insight? How do I get to my essential nature, you know, find a way to laugh a lot. Because that's the one thing that can't, you know, put you into the future or take you into the past. It's really in the moment. So thank you for that. I never it never occurred to me. Yeah, you can't you can't fake it,

Rohini Ross: 38:05

can you if you genuinely laughing you're,

Rob: 38:07

you could tell somebody faking their laugh, you could tell I mean, there might be some good actors, it's over to, you know, when that belly laugh is there, where it's uncontrollable, and you there. And I've also found it funny because I've laughed in situations I weren't supposed to. I remember I remember when I got the job at the Pentagon. I was in Montana. And I had for I think five days to get back to Montana out process and get to Washington, DC, but I had to drive. So across the US so I actually have a car accident within the first four hours I go, Cliff because I kept some dry ice. I mean, black ice drives, I get some ice and I shoot off a cliff. As I'm going off the cliff. I literally said, God, just don't let me die. If I don't just don't let me die. The snow kind of catches my fall and we slide and when I can't get the vehicle is on the side. I kind of have to push it the door open to jump out. But I wasn't dressed for cold weather because I was driving so I had like some fan pants and not really thinking I'm going to be out in the cold. And so I have to reach back in and grab a jacket. And I look out the side and I see the trailer of my motorcycle. And I was like God, you could have saved the motorcycle. Like I like I had already forgotten I had ax for life just for me and so I bust out laughing like are you kidding me right now? Put your jack you know and you know I'm running up the hill and, and yeah, and it was so funny, but even the way that came together when they pulled me out of that ditch. It was the first time I've ever seen one tow truck connect to another one because the car was so far down. So the first truck on Platt ground level ground look Work the truck. And then that truck lowered its cable to pull my truck back up. But because I didn't die, and the last two people who had went off that clip had die, the mechanics work went because we were out there for hours and hours telling them, you know, I'm going to lose my job at the Pentagon, Pentagon, and they appeared and cut their color there. Everything about them look to just like the people who were in Washington, DC, if you understand what I mean. But their love for the military, they worked all night well, and got my vehicle in condition to drive a cause. They saw the color of my skin and it was hesitation at first because Did you understand what I mean? When I said there was it?

Rohini Ross: 40:50

Okay, I get it.

Rob: 40:51

Um, but because I was military, and I was going to the Pentagon that trumped for them their belief on and they work to get my vehicle up. And I got across the country in it. So in moments of, of when you don't suppose to bust out laughing, it's just been enough to break it. For me at least. Yeah.

Rohini Ross: 41:14

Wow. That's a powerful story. And, and it just shows how mindset can shift in a moment. They have their preconceptions and bias. And then all of a sudden you say something and something shifts, and they see the universal?

Rob: 41:27

No, this was a small little town and in a the off route of Montana, right before you get to Billings. So to them, the Pentagon and military was just as big as it was to me going to the military. Yeah. Because that's the values in which they grew up on strong military. And so yeah, it was very interesting. Very, very, very cool, too, because I got there.

Rohini Ross: 41:56

And so Rob, I know that relationship isn't necessarily that isn't necessarily your specialty. But I'm sure that this understanding has served you and had you seen things about relationships. So we'd love since our listeners are often looking in the direction of relationship, if you would be open to sharing what you see differently now versus before, around relationship, if there's anything that occurs to you.

Rob: 42:22

Yeah. It's very funny because it is true. I am. All of my relationships has changed, those who my siblings, those were my parents, those with Laurie, my life partner, all of it is changed. When I came into this understanding. I remember being the older brother, I was tasked with always being the person to lead and tell them that they'd tattoo and, and I, because my father wasn't in the household. I felt I had to be my younger brother who was from the same I felt I had to be his dad. And when I came into this understanding, and realizing I wasn't his dad, I was his brother. And I had a lot of years of trying to be a father, but I had zero years of just being a brother. So that was the first that was a big relationship change that now he's, oh my god, he faces me probably a little too much. But we're at it. Like, that's my little brother, man. And he he calls and we talk often. And we're in two different lifestyles. We're two different lifestyles, he hit accept something, you know, the other day about putting his guns in the house. And I just asked him was that smart? Because the environment he's in being caught without a gun could be the potential of my mother, mother, my mother and grandmother crying. It could be, but I just want to make sure he understood why he was doing it. And it worked for him. So that's, that's how that went. And the other one was with Laurie I call it low. was realizing I didn't have to play to be a man. I wasn't. And in my role with her and what I mean by that is, I had always been told, what makes you a man is the amount of money you have, the power and amount of women you have in your life is glorified in the movies, in the rap in hip hop, you know, it's it's a cultural thing, or for me, it was cultural. And, and so I really didn't never really had a lot of money. So that was never going to be its I didn't, I didn't choose that way. I have a little power trips in the military when I did get to Thursdays. But for some reason, I've always had a lot of women in my life. And I remember one time. What she did was so unique was when she asked me to come out here. I was under the impression she was doing it for us to be together. And when I had gotten to a point where I was healed in my mind, we were sitting it down and she said She was we were watching a movie or something. It's just kind of sad. And I'm like, baby like, What? What's wrong? Like? Why not? Is this is him sad? Because soon you're going to be moving out. awesome movie like, God put me out. And she was like, wait, no, I would never put you out. And I was like, So where am I going? What are you talking about? CVS like? Well, I've always thought that when you got heels, you're just going to move. And I was like, Well, what was you doing all this for just for me to move? CVS like, I was doing all this because you needed it. And I was your friend. And I'm like, Well, wait. So do you want to be with me? You know, I'm like, No, I'm all like, wait, what's happening right now you break it out with me. It's that's what this is, you know? And, and she was like, No, I would love to spend the rest of my life with you. But when I asked you to come out here, you were, you are not right. So I was just trying to get you healed. And for you to make whatever decision you want it to make, though, that had nothing to do with this. And that threw me for a long time. It because I've never experienced that. Where she was just saying, No, I did that because you needed it. And I remember being out on a date. And just looking at the young lady, and saying, I'm so sorry, but I'm about to go home. And she smiled and said, Yeah, I'm glad. And that threw me. So x, y. And she says, because she's all you talking about? And I was like, Oh, and I came home and I said, Hey, we're good. That's all I said. I said we're good. And that's that's been it. I mean, it's, it's just unbelievable that it no longer makes sense to me. That jumping in and out of these small interactions gives me some type of validity, or having so called notches on my belt makes me a better man. It just literally fell away. And now I truly in my work, get to have intimate moments with clients who are females , who don't feel like I'm trying to come on to them. She can walk up and see me just hugging someone crying, and she's gonna come and rub my back. Because the expression now is I'm not trying to get in nobody pants, and I hope that's appropriate for the podcast. But I'm just trying to love people, period. You know, so that's how it's changed in relationships. It's open to door to have friends now. with clear, clear, like, I'm not you know, it's that's not what this is. I just want to know who you are. I want to experience you. I want to love you too. Like, I want to support you too. And she loves me for doing that. And so yeah, that's that's how my relationships are with my parents has been amazing, because they're done from the story. You know, they gave me my best opportunity at life birth. They didn't fit the story, I prepare for them. I get it. But neither did I as a parent. So now I just love and so we're good. So yeah, that's this, this understanding for me has changed everything about the way I see life. Not in a not in one lane. Not not in this car only. This is this understanding is me now and I just show up in the other different places. So

Rohini Ross: 48:57

it's beautiful.You're wiping away a tear.

Angus Ross: 49:18

thought that I was getting close. Because the emotion was

Rohini Ross: 49:25

Angus is known to be more of a crier than I am. So we have a set of questions that we ask our guests are you willing to play along with us?

Rob: 49:38

Let's play

Rohini Ross: 49:38

and they're just you know, more when we talked about it Angus and I with these questions, we see them more as kind of like improv there's so many different answers you could give. So we just ask that you not overthink it and just go with whatever comes forward for you.

Angus Ross: 49:51

Cool. All right. And it seems it seems like from what you said that you are now the master of improv anyway and hosting Not only now we get to see it in action.

Rob: 50:04

se it in action.

Rohini Ross: 50:06

no pressure off the table. Can I start? Angus?

Angus Ross: 50:14

Rob should know that it's that it's obviously these questions are all revolving around relationship. So that's the theme. Yeah.

Rob: 50:22

I thought it was like algebra test. Okay. So there is no right answer. There's my answer. Okay, right. Okay, good. As long as it's not a algebra test isn't up, here we go.

Rohini Ross: 50:37

And so in your current relationship, what is one of the fondest memories for you?

Rob: 50:45

My first vacation. We, I traveled all over the world in the military, but I've never been on vacation. everywhere I've ever went, I brought the intensity of my job. So our first vacation, we toured Europe and we were on the Amalfi coast in Italy. And they gave us one parking spot, but everywhere we would go, I would rent another car and park it farther down the road. And for evacuation purposes, because that's what we did in the military for protection teams. And I remember her saying, do we always have to do that? It's gonna make the trip a lot more expensive, and it's super difficult, you know? And, and it fell away from me. You really enjoy the Amalfi Coast. And that's why it's one of the most favorite places I've ever been. And it was that that God trip. I love that place. I absolutely adore it. So

Rohini Ross: 51:43

that's great. I love that..

Angus Ross: 51:47

Well, yeah, so just so I can understand so. So you had a must like you had a getaway car?

Rob: 51:54

Yes, yes. It took me years to break that.

Angus Ross: 51:57

Okay. But yes, just one on the Amalfi Coast. It wasn't like there were different getaway cars in different places on Yeah,

Rob: 52:05

no, no, just one Yeah, I've only I bought two before though. I have bought them before and parked one any across the street. Because of what I remember being told about this particular country reason. It was just it was a bad prejudice against that country, which was ignorance on my part. Which wives should have had to pay extra. Yeah. That was on me. But yeah, I just carry weapons and everything but all that is guys no need for in my opinion now.

Angus Ross: 52:33

Yeah. Wow. Yeah. apart and must still I'm with James Bond here.

Rob: 52:38

No, no, please.

Angus Ross: 52:42

Okay, so the next question. Excuse me. What is one of the funniest memories on your in your relationship?

Rob: 52:53

Hmm. We laugh so much. Her face when she saw me screaming at the neighbor. And I remember saying to her, she was just so rare. And I was like, Hey, you got a black man. You okay, y'all gotta come back. You got he just bust out of that. Like it was enough to break it. That Yeah, it just it because she had never seen that. But it was just so funny afterwards. Because she had sent me like 30 messages. So scared of what's happening in your office? Are y'all Okay, what's happening? And so that's the one I could come to right now. This is her face when I when she saw from, from kick your ass to hugging my neighbor, like,

Rohini Ross: 53:47

What's going on?

Rob: 53:48

exactly what's going on? Yeah,

Rohini Ross: 53:52

that's great. And like we said, Just pick one we know there's many. And so this one might sound a little like a heavier question. But again, just go with whatever first comes to mind. So what was one of the most difficult times in your relationship? And how did you get through it?

Rob: 54:08

Oh, that was easy. It was the pivot. I was shed asked me a question. And I took defense. That was that was always my first reaction to anything. I took defense. And in my defense, I murdered a murdered, screamed, whatever you want to call it the words. I'm a grown ass man. You're not going to tell me what to do. And her comment back was baby I think I'm the only person in the room who knows that's true. And that I left and I was angry. I left and I really sat with what she said. And yeah She was I didn't know and that was probably the most and how I got through it was not trying to be a grown ass man. You know just be Yeah. So yeah

Rohini Ross: 55:18

it's amazing when those kind of comments cut through the noise of the ego and it really

Rob: 55:27

like, like like a 300 pound box that hit you square in the chest. I see small so it was like bought out without from the file. Yeah, exactly. Have you been saving up? Cuz she is. Yeah that when that one was like, whoa. So yeah, that's why I remember so well.

Angus Ross: 55:53

Okay, so next one. How do you divide domestic labor in your relationship?

Rob: 56:01

domestic labor, give me examples like, like, washing, cooking or

Rohini Ross: 56:07

Anything that is around the home.

Angus Ross: 56:09

Okay. Rohini won't do any cleaning up so.

Rob: 56:17

Okay, well, I'm Rohini

Angus Ross: 56:19

use the vacuum cleaner. I didn't think

Rob: 56:22

I'm Rohini. Alright, so there's really only one big chore because we're both pretty. I don't want to use the term. We're very particular about how things are being cleaned me from my military background inspections and just heard from the way are the biggest tour honestly, is taking care of the dogs.She see does it so much better than me? I just hands off. I'm like, I'm literally like the weekend father, like I just want to find stuff. I don't I don't know. I don't want to I don't want none of that. That's all you. You know, they're only my dogs when they're listening. They're only mine when they got the pretty pictures. But whenever they're acting acids, they're yours and you take them and you handle them because they're bad odds right now. Uh huh. And we both were both vegetarians, but we eat differently. And she's more of a raw vegetarian, and I'm more cooked. So we just cook our own or eat our own. We usually do it together but we just grab our own food. She does majority of washing because she would like to wash more. So she'll wash and I'll just grab it and fold it. But I would wait to the week is over to wash but she doesn't like getting clothes and she watches daily. So I'm like Alright, we'll just put them up. I'll put them back here because I do I'm okay with laundry. So what else what else was there?

Angus Ross: 57:47

Well, just as a sidebar, what dogs do you have? How many dogs plural? How many?

Rob: 57:53

Three dogs. I have three dogs. Hazel is my first she was a rescue from a breeding farm. She was a runt and they were going to probably put her down so we took her mocha being was my second rescue. She was an owner surrender owner who she at MOCA has a lot of allergies and and things wrong with her skin. So it was just very expensive for the last owner so she surrender and we got her in 2018 and just kind of got insurance and got her all well and undercoat under got the condition under control. And Coco was my last rescue and rescue her during the pandemic. But she was an American staffer who someone had abused by clipping their ears clipping her tail and because of her coat, she's so beautiful that they just bred her over and over and gave her home c sections so she has so much scar tissue that that was just going to put her down because she was obese. And the I think it was Pitbull rescue or somebody founder. And we were able to get her. And so we got that under control. And now they so two English Bulldogs, and one American staffer, and 6058 6481 pounds. And even funny enough, I did not like dogs before coming into the understanding.

Angus Ross: 59:21

Wow,

Rob: 59:22

I was scared of them. I remember the first time I've ever went to Michael house. I asked him Could you put your dogs away please? Yeah,

Angus Ross: 59:28

he's still scared of the poop though, right? Yeah.

Rob: 59:31

Oh, yeah. Got it a group that I never

Rohini Ross: 59:34

You don`t want to get over that.

Rob: 59:35

Yeah. No, I think I'm allergic to it from scratch and now it's unsafe. It's I'm I you know, you're talking about my life here beyond for my life in jeopardy with

Rohini Ross: 59:48

the two of you sound like you've got a very good system and Angus obviously still has complaints on his end. So on a similar note how our finance is handled in your relationship.

Rob: 1:00:01

Oh, her. She just has a different understanding. She's managed, or she's had money out of a totally different socio economic bracket than I have before. And so I remember having to be open to learning how it worked. How her understanding she used to manage bands. And so she did PR for bands. So she was always in accounting with how distribution of money got paid. And she, she's always understood that, and so in, in housing, and when purchasing a home, it's my first purchase, and I'm like, Oh, these numbers, and she could explain it. And I trust her like nothing else. So it makes sense. And so she handles Yeah. Because if not, we'd be all know where we are with that.

Angus Ross: 1:00:52

That's great. And just to be completely transparent, that is where Rohini skills really come into there.

Rohini Ross: 1:01:02

I'll say one thing when Angus and I were dating in London, I was I started modeling, and I needed to know I didn't know how to do taxes in England. So Angus is well, I'll introduce you to my accountant, and he can help you out with your taxes because you don't know how to do it. And so when I went to see Angus`s accountant, he said to me, my cat knows more about money than Angus does. I think he was trying to warn me off or something.

Rob: 1:01:36

That was me. I mean, money meant new shoes for me. New shoes, new toys. What bills come on, man. I'll get there. I gotta get for me. I need Jordans you know. So

Rohini Ross: 1:01:48

I`m thinking may be some similarities there.

Angus Ross: 1:01:54

All right. So next question. What was the biggest misunderstanding you woke up from in your relationship?

Rob: 1:02:05

What I've thought love was to what love really is. I thought love meant, do this. Don't do that. And conditional love could possibly mean that. But unconditional love means I accept you for who you are. And if I want to be with you, then I'm not trying to change you. You are who you are. And yeah, for my daughters, for all of them. It was the difference between what I thought and conditional love was versus what it really is. If you love me, you will do this. I love you. I'll do that versus No. The loving of you has no bearing on it. Because that is that's gone to stay. So that's the biggest awakening.

Angus Ross: 1:02:54

That's profound. That's definitely going on the podcast.

Rohini Ross: 1:03:00

Absolutely. What sorry, was it Angus,

Angus Ross: 1:03:05

one of those little soundbite show reels.

Rohini Ross: 1:03:09

What's the favorite thing your partner does for you?

Rob: 1:03:13

Every morning she wakes up before I do because I when I was in that snow I had a I acquired a condition called frosted nip where I was close to frostbite. So I love part of reason I love California because the heat but whenever my body gets cold my extremities, they clam and my pain my feet in my hands get very very painful. So she wakes up about an hour, maybe even sometimes 30 minutes to an hour before me and goes downstairs and make sure it's heated and warm. So that when I wake up I won't wake up and come down into pains because I hand brew my coffee and stuff. So it's it's something she does so she hates if we if she ever wakes up at the same time. She's like, No, no, stay stay down. Let me go downstairs real quick. And I just I just adore that. Not that I need it all the time, but I understand why she does it or what the space is. She's coming from when she does it. That's why I love it so much.

Rohini Ross: 1:04:16

That's lovely.

Angus Ross: 1:04:18

Okay, well what is the least favorite thing your partner does?

Rob: 1:04:22

Cooks food for these damn dogs. Oh my god, I really like it smells and stuff. Man that is what's that? Oh, this dogs supper. What? That's what what? That is for them? You know, the girls can do no wrong. Like they're out there. They can do no wrong and I just oh my god. Okay, yeah. I want the dogs to eat well,

Rohini Ross: 1:04:51

I guess I can just imagine Angus cooking for our dog Niko?

Angus Ross: 1:05:02

Yeah, don't get any idea.

Rob: 1:05:04

Yeah.

Rohini Ross: 1:05:10

So this again is kind of it could be a no, I don't have one, but we just want to explore it. So what's one of your relationship deal breakers and why?

Rob: 1:05:20

Insecurity, insecurity. Because it is my understanding of insecurities, they will allow you to protect who You're something else other than who you are. And I just need to know who you are, because I'm going to love you anyway. So if you are become in the business of showing me someone else, then that's not where I want to be. And so I'm very open and honest and transparent about every my passcode on my phone is her birthday, my computer, password says her, you're free to go in anything. Because I don't need you to be insecure, because that is a walk. Out walk. Because if you show me who you are, I don't care whether it's a drug addiction, I don't care if you ran into somebody you think you like, I love you. And if you come to the realization that you enjoy spending time with someone else, and you believe that's truly what you want, I'm going to enjoy you having what you think you want. Yes, it may hurt me. Oh my god, would it bring me to my knees in tears and sadness? But my love for you means that you have to chase what you want. Not what I want. You know? So? Yeah, if you don't, but if you don't show me who you are, I'm out. Yeah.

Angus Ross: 1:06:38

Damn, you're good.

Rohini Ross: 1:06:42

To ask you.

Angus Ross: 1:06:49

Wow, yeah, that's amazing. All right. So how do you keep physical intimacy alive in your relationship?

Rob: 1:06:58

Um, just with the laughter with the touch with the prioritizing of self caring, knowing how important that component is to a relationship. So you see works hard, I work hard. You know, so every moment we get to touch, you know, it starts throughout the day. And then by time we kids, we hug we hold like, yeah, it's and it's, it's fine, because it's it doesn't always have to be sexual for that. That expression to hit the spot, if you understand what I'm saying. And because that pressure is off, it typically makes it pretty much sexual a lot, if that makes sense. Because it's, it's because it's not got to on Monday, Tuesday, Thursday night, Saturday morning, like, yeah, two brackets that they got to fit in it. The spontaneity of just the expression of each other makes it happen often where it's like, oh, well, that's not a thing, then for real. Yeah.

Rohini Ross: 1:08:10

Thank you. So the final question. If there's only one thing you could say to your partner, what would you like to say to them?

Rob: 1:08:24

Thank you for showing me. Thank you for showing me.

Rohini Ross: 1:08:33

It's really touching. Rob. Well, thank you so much for joining us.

Rob: 1:08:41

Thank you for having me. That was fun! I'm sorry. I forgot we were on a podcast.

Rohini Ross: 1:08:52

It's been a really moving journey, listening to your story, hearing the impact of the understanding in your life. Seeing how it's rippling out for from you and to the lives of others. I mean, it's just really been touching.

Angus Ross: 1:09:10

Yes, this is so touching. And Gosh, I could I would just add an hour with you. I could spend the whole day.

Rob: 1:09:23

Thank you

Angus Ross: 1:09:25

for that opportunity. At some point. I'd love to hang with you guys. Oh, yeah. Yeah, absolutely. Well,it's right to you. You are in Malibu.

Rob: 1:09:34

Over Yeah, Malibu lakes are get over to y'all. And now the canyon. Bangor Canyon. We're in the canyon Canyon.

Angus Ross: 1:09:40

That's the lovely part of the world.

Rob: 1:09:44

I like it. I like it a lot. Yeah, I get to sit out on the deck and in here. And that was another relationship change me to the universe. Me to trees our life carrizal I like hearing them too. You know, my deck in here and the rustling of the trees, the wind, you know, watching the sunset at this end of the mountain and as the season moves, assess over here now learning to hear the universe just as much as I learned to hear my own species. So, yeah, that's been pretty cool to notice relationship turned.

Angus Ross: 1:10:23

I hope. I hope it picks up but there was a point where I think I heard there's a there's a hawk that I thought I heard whistling outside your window. When I work in Malibu there, they have a lot of hawks of

Rob: 1:10:38

Cackling parrots, I feed a bluejay. So every morning, I put a piece of bread, he just comes grab it, he eats a couple pieces, and he takes it away. I got the most gossip and parents that sit right outside my office. And it's like, they talk about everybody business in the neighborhood. They're just like, Oh, my God, I don't have jobs and nothing like I'm trying to work in there in the background. You probably can hear on some of my own podcasts. I have to you know, sue him away or whatever. But it's it on the power line out there. Talk about the neighborhood.

Angus Ross: 1:11:11

It's a bit of texture.

Rohini Ross: 1:11:13

Amazing ears. I guess I didn't notice

Angus Ross: 1:11:15

it. Oh, I noticed the whole because I mean, you said you're in Malibu, it's like that's just one that's just the sort of audio backdrop for me for booking amount of birds is always the Hawks of flying around.

Rob: 1:11:24

I had to soundproof this side of the wall because of hearing so many different things. I put those cards and to close that gap in between cuz Yeah, you can hear everything out there

Rohini Ross: 1:11:37

is great. Well, we love nature. So it's good for our podcast. We're not gonna complain about that.