Self-Care Exercise
(Please note that because this exercise focuses on inner experiences it might not be suitable for people with a traumatic background).
I would like to invite us to this self-care exercise. This quick exercise allows us to check in on our inner experiences at various times throughout the day. There is a second part of the exercise that can be practised if we have time.
Just take a moment or two to focus on our breath, just allowing the breath to ground us to this
moment in time. Without trying to change anything following a few cycles of our body’s natural breathing rhythm.
Now I would like to invite us to guide our focus to what we call the Internal Triangle. The 3 points of this triangle represent our thoughts, emotions and physical sensations.
I would now like to invite us to gently guide our focus of attention to the first point of this Internal Triangle, our thoughts, just noticing if anything is going on in our mind right now. Whether these thoughts are wanted or unwanted, positive, neutral, negative, strong, weak. We are the non-judgemental observer of our thoughts. I would like to invite us to silently say “I am having a thought about ….”. Observing without having to get hooked into them, push them away, or argue with them. Breathing in and out and just noticing whatever is going on in our mind.
Now gently refocusing that attention on the second point of the triangle just noticing what we are feeling if anything emotionally right now. Perhaps giving it a rate of intensity where 1 the emotion is weak, right up to 10 it’s at its strongest and just saying whatever emotion or emotions silently to ourselves“ah here is calmness, frustration, anger, boredom” just being an observer of our inner experiences of emotions without trying to change anything and just breathing in, breathing out. Just allowing ourselves to feel whatever you are feeling – making room for our emotions whether they be wanted or unwanted, weak or powerful.
Now I would like to invite us to gently guide our attention to the third point of this triangle, physical sensations, just noticing any physical sensations that you may be experiencing right now. just silently naming them, noticing where they are, giving them a rating of intensity. Focusing on the sensation without getting caught up in judging, analysing, or trying to change the experience. Just breathing in whatever physical sensations we are experiencing, if any, and just breathing out from these experiences.
I would now like to introduce some metaphors that some people find helpful when focusing on the internal triangle of experiences. These metaphors can be a useful addition to the Internal Triangle when we have more time to sit with our internal experiences
The first metaphor is called leaves on a stream. I would like to invite us to either imagine or visualise that we are standing on a river bank next to a tree and the branches of this tree overhang the water and the leaves that fall into the water represent our inner experiences: our thoughts, emotions, physical sensations and sometimes these leaves will just float on by, sometimes they will get stuck, sometimes the water will be rapid white water and these leaves will be bouncing about, getting thrashed all over the place but reminding
ourselves that we are not our inner experiences. We are the observer so we don’t have to get swept up by them no matter how turbulent the water. At times it feels as though we have jumped into the river and we know how difficult it is to get out once we feel as though we have been swept away. So we are just the observer of these inner experiences, not trying to change them. We don’t have to fight them and get swept up. We make space for our inner experiences and remember that they are part of a broader landscape within us and even out with us. They will run their course and change in intensity in their own time.
The other metaphor I would like to introduce to you is called dropping the anchor. This can be useful when we experience high emotions or what feels like an emotional storm within us. If we visualise or imagine a boat coming into shallow water and there is a storm. The boat will drop its anchor. It does not stop the storm but it stops the boat being swept off course, thrashing into rocks causing damage. So we drop our anchor, we remove ourselves and we ride out the storm that will pass in its own time only this time we have not thrashed about, we have not collided with others, we have not carried out behavioural reactions in the height of an emotion. We have sat and breathed into the storm until it
subsides. If we imagine being in a boat, we would have a life jacket on. So I would like to invite you to visualise our emotional life jacket. What do we need to help us navigate through the rest of the day? We are not just about to bring this exercise to an end. So I would invite us to gently open our eyes or to bring our focus up from the floor and maybe just wriggle our fingers and toes to bring ourselves fully back to the moment.