Kids who have been hurt inside connection and relationship protect themselves from getting hurt again.

This can leave us feeling that they don't want connection.

Which leaves us feeling like we don't want to offer connection.  It starts to hurt too bad to keep offering something so vulnerable when we keep getting rejected.

Maybe it would help to know that humans need connection to survive.  Your child may be acting like they don't need or want connection, but they do.

In fact, the intensity with which they work to reject connection is the intensity with which they've been hurt in connection.

It feels hopeless, sometimes (or much of the time) to love a person who rejects connection.

It feels hopeless but it isn't hopeless.  In fact, in this episode I'll tell you what that hopeless really is.

Don't forget to hit the subscribe button and add Parenting after Trauma to your podcast player!

Then head over to robyngobbel.com/masterclass for a F R E E video series on the three questions we should all be asking ourselves when our kids are behaving in baffling, confusing, frustrating and overwhelming way.

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HUGE announcement! The Baffling Behavior Training Institute's {NEW!} is now accepting applications for the 2026 cohorts of the Professional Training Program (formerly Being With). 

In 2026 we will have a second cohort that meets in the evening, eastern time- which is the morning in Asia and Australia!

You must be on the waiting list to apply! RobynGobbel.com/Immersion

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Grab a copy of my book Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors robyngobbel.com/book

Join us in The Club for more support! robyngobbel.com/TheClub

Apply for the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Professional Immersion Program (formerly Being With) robyngobbel.com/Immersion

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Over on my website you can find:
Webinar and eBook on Focus on the Nervous System to Change Behavior (FREE)
eBook on The Brilliance of Attachment (FREE)
LOTS & LOTS of FREE Resources
Ongoing support, connection, and co-regulation for struggling parents: The Club
Year-Long Immersive & Holistic Training Program for Parenting Professionals: The Baffling Behavior Training Institute’s (BBTI) Professional Immersion Program (formerly Being With)