The College Athlete Mindset Shift

Being “the guy” in high school feels great until you land in a gym where you’re suddenly the third shortest player and everyone is faster, stronger, and more polished. That’s where this conversation with Kyle Mars, the men’s volleyball coach at Baldwin Wallace University and a former Penn State D1 player, gets real fast.

We talk about Kyle’s path from Rochester, New York to the Big Ten, why he chose Penn State, and what it’s like to embrace a program knowing you may not start right away. The bigger theme is the mindset shift every athlete faces at the next level: learning humility, earning reps, and letting great teammates and coaches push you instead of protecting your ego. If you care about college athletics, athlete development, or the recruiting process for men’s volleyball, you’ll hear practical advice on outreach emails, highlight tapes, and why coaches notice far more than raw talent.

The conversation also takes a fun turn into stand-up comedy and performance, connecting open mics to practice reps, “bombing” to learning, and the overlooked business side of building a career. We close with a surprisingly deep breakdown of indoor vs beach volleyball, plus what it takes to balance coaching travel with marriage and real life.

Kyle also shares how to catch men’s volleyball, including a simple invite to come watch BW play and a nudge to check out the NCAA men’s Final Four on ESPN+. If you like the show, subscribe, share it with a friend, and leave a review. What’s a moment that humbled you and made you better?

All music brought to you by former guest of the show Speedo

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Transcript

SPEAKER_01 4:48

Welcome everybody to another episode of the Ride Home Rants podcast. This is, as always, your host, Mike Bono. I have a great guest for us today. He's coming to us from Baldon Wallace University. He is the men's volleyball coach, and that is Kyle Mars joins the show. Kyle, thank you for coming on, man.

SPEAKER_00 5:06

Thanks, man. Appreciate you having me. It's good to meet you, Mike.

SPEAKER_01 5:08

Yeah, absolutely. Glad we were able to get this put together here for you. But I mean, so for the new listeners out there, everybody out there, you are originally from the New York State area. Where did you grow up exactly in New York? And what kind of things were you involved in as a kid there in New York?

SPEAKER_00 5:24

Yeah, so I grew up in the Rochester, New York area. So that's a small city in the western New York area. It's like maybe an hour away from Buffalo. So we're used to a lot of snow there. I did not do much with that snow. But something like, yeah. So I moved there when I was eight years old. So my family lived out on the West Coast out in Portland from the time that I was born until age seven. We moved back to Rochester when I was eight. And the reason I say back there is because my parents are from there. So I lived in Rochester from age eight all the way until I went to college. I went to college in Pennsylvania and then I moved out here to Ohio about 10 years ago now. So I lived in a few different spots. Some things I used to do in Rochester before getting into volleyball. I'm from a big family of basketball players. So I will not lie, man. Like after school, we got home, and me and my older brothers just play a lot of basketball. Um, so we would just get home and go outside and just go to a park and stuff like that and just play some fives. So that was big in my life. And I got into a bunch of other sports. I did get into some flag football for a little bit as a youngster. And then when it came time to actually playing some tackle football, it wasn't for me. And then that's how I found volleyball. So I kind of fell into it where I had a teacher when I was in seventh grade who was like, hey, if you're looking to jump higher and just get some more footwork going, the sport of volleyball is great for. You know, I'm kind of looking at him like I did, I didn't know boys played volleyball. And lo and behold, you get into a volleyball practice and you're max jumping, I would say 100 to 150 times like per day. So if you're a tall guy who's looking to increase the vertical and get better at some rebounding and dunking and stuff like that, it actually helped help a lot. And it turned out that I was better at playing the game of volleyball than shooting jumpers. So it kind of afforded me a lot of opportunities. And here we are. Rochester was a great area for the fact that just all the suburbs were so competitive in in lots of sports. And I think the thing I'm starting to find about the state of New York is it's not a huge state in football, but it's a major state in terms of boys basketball. So just like I met a lot of good athletes there. I I had a great time in that city. I still have some family over there, so I'll I'll go visit from time to time. It's like a four-hour drive here to go get there, so it's not too bad.

SPEAKER_01 7:50

But yeah, no, yeah, that's that's not terrible of a drive, four hours. I mean, not too bad. I mean, it's still that it'd be closer. I get it. I live about two hours away from from my family back in West Virginia, and you know, it's I still wish it's closer. It's like, oh, it's two hours, it's not that bad of a drive until you're making that drive, you know what I mean? And then it's like all right, it's two hours there, hang out with them for a little bit. My dog decides she wants to be a part of the show every time I try to talk about anything. My animals decide they want to be on the show. Um bring her in. No, it's seriously that I have the quietest husky in the world, and then I start recording, and then all of a sudden she finds her voice. Uh so yeah, anyways, no husky is her awesome, yeah. And it's just my son coming home. That that's all she's barking at right now. It's just it's fun times here at the bottom household. But but yeah, you know, yeah, and you think it's two hours there, you know, you hang out with them for a little bit and then two hours drive back. So that's four hours just in the car for me just to go and visit my my family for a little bit. So you can put it into perspective like that.

SPEAKER_00 8:58

Yeah, like I think that kind of driving can creep up on you. Like, we'll usually go to Rochester for a whole weekend, so it's a four-hour drive on like a Friday afternoon, and then we'll stay. And so me and my wife both went to high school at the same place. So we met when we were in 10th grade. So her family is like five minutes away from my family there. So whenever we go back to Rochester, it's like a double shot. We visit her family, we visit mine, and we'll just make a weekend of it and take the four-hour drive back on like Sunday. But yeah, so it's not too bad, but it's it's definitely something that we've just learned to do, you know. Right.

Choosing Penn State And D1 Reality

SPEAKER_01 9:32

Yeah, you get used to it, you know, especially like us, you know, we we alternate holidays, you know, what year we go back to West Virginia and what year we stay here with my wife's family. So it it it is what it is, you know, it's it's the qualms of getting older, I always say. So it it is it is what is what it is. But like you said, you bounced around, you went to college in Pennsylvania. You actually attended Penn State University where you actually played D1 volleyball. What what what made you choose Penn State and what was the experience like playing D1 volleyball?

SPEAKER_00 10:04

Yeah, so there's a lot of factors. So I had a brother that also went to Penn State, he was there from 2007 to 2011, so that was a big factor. It was like, hey, I get to be on a team with him again. He actually won a national championship there in 08. So it was really cool that followed that up. And I came in in the fall of 09. So that was a big one, and then I was kind of a tweener. So for the sport of volleyball, I'm 6'3. You would think that that's pretty tall. Uh, when you go to a school like Penn State, most of the guys that I was on the other side of the net with and I was playing with were 6'7 to 6'9. I think the tallest guy that I played with was about 6'10. So I was actually the third shortest guy on this team. And like my personality, I love a challenge, right? So I was doing in high school, I played for a great club. We traveled from a national standpoint. We went to California every year, we went to just a bunch of different states and played in these national type tournaments. So that got me a lot of exposure to these top colleges. And when I was 16, I was doing some training with the youth national team. So, what that is is like basically you go to a tryout the day before a big club tournament, and you just kind of test your wits, like, hey, are you able to play with the best guys around the nation? And they choose like a crop of 24 guys to go train at Colorado Springs. So I was lucky enough to make that 24, and I never actually made the top team of 12, but it was really cool to go train for 10 days and be a part of that last grouping of like 18. Um, that's when I started to think, all right, like I can make something of myself here and I could go pretty far with this. So when I was 16, I got my first letter from Ohio State. And they showed some pretty early interest in me. I got coached by the Ohio State coach when I was at the youth national camp and stuff like that. The main draw for Penn State for me was A, to have some family there, and then B, it was such a good academic offering. And it'll it was only about four and a half hours away from home. And just like when you're on the East Coast, like Penn State as a Big Ten school is just such a household name. So when you go on a visit there, you talk to some of the team and stuff like that. And in our sport, they just have such a rich kind of pedigree of boys' volleyball and men's volleyball there. It was kind of a no-brainer. The biggest thing that I was wondering and I was like swaying with was like, all right, like from essentially eighth grade until the end of my high school years, I was like the guy on my club team and my high school team. And it was like you just get used to that. Yeah. But what I reflect on now is like, I wanted a challenge and I didn't want to be the guy anymore. I kind of wanted a newer challenge. So I went to Penn State, like knowing I wasn't gonna be a starter for four years, and I had to work my way onto the court. And that was a big reason why it's like, hey, I had people all around me that were gonna push me and make me better. So I was never a starter, I got a lot of court time. I I was the oh three, and but just what what I learned there and how I got challenged was just amazing, and it's a fun place to be as well. Like, I think that that was another factor, you know. But yeah, so there's a lot of factors there.

SPEAKER_01 13:19

Yeah, I get it. You know, I I chose Bethany for a swimming scholarship. I was I was a swimmer growing up, I did play football too a little bit back in high school, um, which senior year in hindsight, obviously, probably shouldn't have. I had a bunch of D1 offers to go and swim. And I I always said I'd make a better football coach than I did a player. I was the habitual backup special teamer, just trying to do, like you said, whatever it could, whatever I needed to do to get on the field. And then lo and behold, hurt my shoulder my senior year of football and lost my senior year of swimming at I in high school. So every D1 school, you you get a swimmer with a bomb shoulder, and they're like, No, thank you. And and they dropped those scholarships real quick. But kind of like you in swimming, you know, I I was I was the man at at my high school team, team captain as a sophomore, and just always it's like it it did, it wasn't a challenge for me, even at these big tort tournaments and you know, making regionals every year, it seemed like missed districts by 0.03 seconds, which still stings to this day.

SPEAKER_00 14:37

Yeah, I mean, this is like so slim. So, what's crazy about swimming, man, like a sidebar, whenever the college coaches are going to recruit swimmers, they don't actually need to go see them live like most of the time, they're just looking at times, and that's so much different than a lot of other sports. So it's just really interesting.

SPEAKER_01 14:55

I I never saw one recruiter, maybe one, and it was I think it was Bethany who actually came to me because I was about 20 minutes away from the campus, so where my high school was. So, you know, I I saw them, but for the most part, everyone was just looking at my times, and then you know, lo and behold, I go to a D3 school, and I'm not the man anymore. You know what I mean? I'm I I'm putting up times and I'm seeing guys that are already done, and it's like that was that was my best right now, and these guys are just cooking me. So it yeah, it made me push an eye on right. Yeah, it really just you know, you think, oh, I got this, I can go and do this, and you're really not ready until you until you learn, you know.

Getting Humbled And Building Habits

SPEAKER_00 15:41

So dude, it's it's crazy just being put into a different type of mindset, and I deal with that now with a lot of the freshmen that I bring in to BW. It's like, hey man, like you might be used to being the guy, you might be used to being called upon every single time to make the big play, and maybe you're getting a lion's share of the volume, right? But then you get to college and that mindset shift is really difficult. So it's really helpful to just be primed. And I would say that for any step up in any kind of industry, right? Like, even going from like an academic class from high school to college is like just a different type of mindset. Things are coming at you a lot faster, and just being humble is huge, man. And that's something that I was like ready to go when I got there. I was like, all right, I'm about to get humbled here and I'm ready for it.

SPEAKER_01 16:28

And get that nice slice of humble pie. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 16:31

Right, man. Yeah. And it's like, you got to get your mouth open because it's it's gonna be there quick, right? But but yeah, like I had good teammates that would pull me aside and talk to me and be like, hey man, like you're doing some good things here, but make sure you're just considering this and considering that. And I think the biggest thing is if you have teammates that are also there to help you move forward, develop, and stuff like that. Obviously, the staff is going to be doing that. But if your team members are doing that, then it just feels like home, right?

SPEAKER_01 17:00

Yeah. Um, I I was lucky enough on my team that two of my teammates were my fraternity brothers, so I had them pushing me. Even on days when I would wake up, like, do I really want to get up for this 6 a.m. practice and get in that cold ass water in the middle of winter? And they were coming banging on my door five. They're like, Well, you gotta practice big dog. It's like, yeah, we do, don't we, guys? You're right.

SPEAKER_00 17:22

I should yeah, you're right.

SPEAKER_01 17:24

I need I'm not the band anymore. I need to get there.

SPEAKER_00 17:26

You can do the dog days of winter, man.

SPEAKER_01 17:27

Yep, it's just yeah, in winter, you're in that cold water, nobody wants to be in that at 6 a.m. So it's yeah, it's not fun, but it it all pays off in the end.

SPEAKER_00 17:38

Do you know what's crazy to think about? And I talk to some friends about this all the time. If you had to at the age like I'm 35. So if I had to go and live the life that I was living when I was in college at age 20, I would just be so tired and I would be in pain every single day. Like there was times on like a Thursday at night, we'd go out for a wing night and be out at like 1:30. And then you you have to get up at like uh 9 a.m. and and go lift or something like that. And you're probably up a little bit earlier to get to class first, right? Yeah, but it's like, man, right now at age 30, like if I have a couple glasses of bourbon, like I'm I'm out for the next day. Like, I gotta get up and shake some dust off, you know.

SPEAKER_01 18:18

I laugh because I have these conversations at my day job. I work, I'm 37, so you know, we're around the same age, and like there's younger guys at work that are like, man, I went out last night, we did this, we did that, and I got like a couple hours of sleep, and then here I am, and all bright-eyed and bushy-tailed. And I was like, hang on to those dreams, my man, because when you hit 30, I'm telling you, it's not gonna happen. Uh I I feel I had a couple of beers the other night, and it's a three to five day recovery process. Like, it's it's I'm not as you like.

SPEAKER_00 18:51

I feel like there's Cliff, and I'm not really quite sure what age it was, but there was a year where it was like, Okay, like I was up a little bit late the night before, just had a couple pops, and then the next morning I'm getting up for work at 6 30, and it's like, oh yeah, that feels a little different. Yep.

Comedy Life And The Business Side

SPEAKER_01 19:07

I say, yes, 30 it was was for me when I hit 30. I always say, I always make the joke that check engine light came on in my body and it will not turn off, you know. Things I used to be able to do, and it's just like, man, I'm really feeling my age here because I feel younger than like mentally, I still feel like I'm in my 20s, you know, doing comedy and starting when I was in my 20s. I've been doing stand-up comedy for 14 years now, yeah. Um and you know, making these big long drives, doing a show, turning around, stopping at a rest stop on my way back to get a couple hours of sleep in the back of my car to go to my date, go to work the next day, and like it was nothing. You know, now thinking about it just made me tired thinking it like just thinking about doing that right now, like that would be miserable right now at almost 40.

SPEAKER_00 20:02

Yeah, I'm I'm I'm good for like one late night, maybe every couple weeks, and I'm good. But so being in the world of comedy, like who's your favorite comic?

SPEAKER_01 20:12

I I have a bunch. Lately, it's been a lot of Chris Delia. I've been watching, big fan of him. Derek Stroops is another one I've been real big fans of, but I'm always like, you know, I I've seen Tom Segura live a couple of times. I've seen Burke Chrysler live, they're phenomenal. Bill Burr is uh the people tell me that I I remind them of him on stage because I I got dubbed, I got dubbed the first time I went on stage as the angry white comic, because I just go on these long gold rants, hence the name of the show, the podcast with the ride at home rants, yeah, and just about stuff that irritates me. I I my main shtick is stupid should hurt because I I I deal with stupid questions working in retail as long as I have, and just stupid questions and how I would want to respond to them in the moment, but I can't because I like my job and I like those paychecks coming in. So they were like, Man, you're just the angry white comic. If you said it once, and lo and behold, 14 years later, I'm still known as the angry white comic.

SPEAKER_00 21:17

I love Bill Burr, man. He's he's one of my favorites. So I grew up watching a lot of Dave Chappelle, and we would watch Chappelle show like all the time, and now I think it's just like so un PC that it's like I I kind of tiptoe around like telling people I used to watch that a lot. But I think Bill Burr was on that show like way back in like 03, and that's when he started getting big, I think. I'm pretty sure, yeah. But that's how I first kind of heard of Bill Burr, and I was like, this guy is awesome. I didn't know that he did stand up until like 06 or 07. I was like, he's got some stand-ups out there, it's amazing.

SPEAKER_01 21:51

It's it's crazy, you know, to think, you know, like the journey. Like people think what I tell them in my comic, like, oh, so you work like an hour a night most nights. It's like I wish that was the case, man. Like, because uh you always gotta be looking for new material, you always gotta be writing, you always have to be doing stuff like this, you know, running podcasts and and that, and then there's merchandise stores that you you have to because the show's I think they there's decent pay in it, but most of the money is selling the merchandise afterwards, you know what I mean. You don't have to split that with the booker or promoter or somebody else that's on the show and stuff like that. So you it's people don't realize it's a show business. You know what I mean? Like you can be good at the show, but if you're bad at that business part, like that's that's what that's the thing people miss is the business aspect of it. And it is a business, and it's it's tough to get into it, and a lot of people fizzle out after a couple of years. Because I I think I and I hate to say it because again, you're like you're saying it's not really PC, but it's the day and age that we're in. Everything has to be instant gratification, you know what I mean? If it's not right now, no, I'm not doing it. Oh 14 years later, and I'm still considered an up-and-coming comic.

SPEAKER_00 23:08

Yeah, well, it's like there's so many out there too, right? I mean, you have to deal with a little bit of failure, and I'm sure that there's a couple times that people are gonna think that you bombed or whatever, and it's like, man, are you able to look past that and get right back out there? There's gotta be a lot of just like to have all those eyeballs on you and just say, like, hey, I need to crush this, like, I need to like deliver perfectly has got to be really tough. But I view comics as like the same thing as an author. It's like you are writing all the time. And I was listening to another podcast a while ago, and somebody made a great point about like and tell me if I'm wrong about this, but like putting yourself in situations where you're just like experiencing things, and that's when material will start will start to come up. It's like, hey, like I was at Costco the other day, and just hearing somebody have a conversation just got me thinking about this concept that I can make some jokes with, or like maybe I was stuck in traffic and people were yelling at each other, and it was great to hear that, and you come up with a couple of jokes from that or something, right?

SPEAKER_01 24:12

That's that's a lot of my because you know, you're on the road a lot as a comic, and you know, you you get in those traffic jams and you hear people, and most of the time it's me, I'm the one yelling, but I have a whole notes section in my phone with probably 300 to 400 different things, and it's something that I heard as I can make a joke out of that, yeah. And I put it in there, and you know, oh that made me laugh. I'm gonna see if it makes you know what I mean. And you you're always constantly trying to find ideas, and I also have a a joke notebook that comes around with me everywhere I go, just in case you never know when inspiration is going to destroy. Sometimes it's something I dreamt about, and you know, you wake up and that was funny, yeah, and you know, you just you just kind of put it in there and then you kind of start the writing process. At least that's how I do it. Yeah, I I live my daily life, and then I find the funny in weird situations, and that's where I think the the best part of my comedy comes from. Yeah, is the real events.

SPEAKER_00 25:16

What's that kind of schedule like?

Recruiting Advice And Multi-Sport Development

SPEAKER_01 25:18

It's been hit or miss. I've taken a little bit of a hiatus from the stage to work on the the podcast for a little bit here, but I have been working with a booking agent here, so more shows will be coming up here soon. So as of right now, yeah, it's been a couple of months since I've been on stage. You know, sometimes you need that as a comic, the grind of doing shows a couple a month even can can wear on you to where okay, now I'm I'm traveling to Columbus to do a show, then coming back, you know, day job. Now I'm going to Cleveland, you know, doing a show that now it's back to West Virginia now. It's you know, it's you're you're bouncing all over the place, and it's it's tough. And people want to harp on, like, oh well, you're only doing an open mic. Why are you doing an open mic? It's like you played a sport when you were growing up, right? You know, like, yeah, I was like, so you practiced, right? It was like, yeah, I was like, that's my practice field. Getting reps, man. Getting getting getting reps in and finding out because if when you bomb, I mean, it it's not if you're going to bomb, it's when you're gonna bomb on stage as a comedian. And that is your learning moment. So I'd rather bomb at an open mic night where it's a free show where I know I'm not getting paid. There's not probably not gonna be a ton of people at an open mic. It's typically at a bar somewhere, and you're just kind of getting there to to work out the new jokes. But it's like, all right, well, this worked here. At this part, so where didn't it work and what do I need to change to make it funnier? And sometimes it's just a little bit of an embellishment, you know, and it's little things that you you find and you want to work on. And I'm sure it's the same thing like with you with volleyball, and that so do you have any like tips for like any recruits coming in that are wanting to play volleyball and that habit, maybe?

SPEAKER_00 27:13

Yeah, so I think the first thing is like man, there's a lot of tips. Like, what I would say for our sport is it is a smaller sport, and what I mean by by that is nationally, there's about a hundred K kids that are playing at like a high school level at this point. You compare that to men's basketball or boys' basketball, where there's two million kids out there that are playing, it might be more than that, I'm not quite sure. So it is a smaller world. With that being said, there are less coaches at the college level out there. So there is more of a, hey, let's help grow this game. So, what that means, and where I'm going, is like if you're looking to play at the college level, send an email out, get a highlight tape, and just send it to whoever you might be interested in exploring at the college level. And I think you're probably gonna get one of two answers. Most of the time, it's probably gonna be a no, but a lot of the time it's gonna be like, let's set up a phone call. Whereas, like, I think in the basketball world, there are so many kids out there, and a college coach is getting probably 200 of those a day that a lot of times kids aren't gonna hear back, right? Whereas in men's volleyball, you're probably gonna hear back from a coach and get a yes or a no, and you never know when you're gonna get that yes, and you have to be comfortable with getting no's, right? So that's the first thing just to start off. And I will take this here. I want to go here next because I want to hear your thoughts on this with having a kid and you played a bunch of sports. The thing that I talk about a lot with young players, I helped run a couple of clubs here in the last like six years. I'm currently helping a club start up here that we just started for this past year. And I coach 13's kids where they're just getting into the sport for the first time. And I think that that's a really important age level because you're developing habits, right? Uh, not only on how to play a sport, but how to treat teammates and all this other stuff. So I think you almost need your best coaches at that, at that level to get those types of habits in place, both from like an interpersonal standpoint and a sport standpoint. But I tell kids at that age all the time, you should be playing as many sports as you possibly can for as long as you can. And I think that cross-training is really good for any athlete. And there is a saying at the higher level of coaching of that specialization is for ants. So, like, look at a sport like if you have a safety who is able to come over to the offensive end and play to play at wide receiver, like that's pretty valuable to a football team. Right. If you have a big man in basketball who's 6'9 who can step out and shoot threes, that's pretty valuable to a man's basketball team, right? The same thing goes for a volleyball player. It's like, hey, if you're a versatile athlete that maybe you spent some time playing football, but you can also have a great vertical. So you have this combo of strength and speed and vertical, that's really valuable to us at the higher level. So I always tell kids like, don't specialize until you absolutely have to, which is when you get to college. Cause like that season is seven months long. You're playing a lot of volleyball, you're doing a lot of training. But I'd be curious to see, like, just as a father, like, there's there's a lot of parents that think they have to specialize a kid of like, if you want to be a baseball player, you have to only play baseball from age 12 on. It's like, no way.

SPEAKER_01 30:45

Yeah, I mean, I I agree. You know, I played a ton of sports growing up, even through their through that like eight to twelve range. I mean, I I I'd played soccer, football, basketball, baseball. I swam from the time I was eight all the way through college. That was obviously the main sport that I was obviously really, really good at and wanted to focus my energy on. You know, and you know, I was always that that kid, kind of like you were saying at the beginning. Like after school, me and my buddies would go out to the neighborhood basketball course and we were shooting hoops. Made me realize I'm terrible at basketball. I am six foot five. I am terrible at basketball. And like I made my eighth grade basketball team by like they were like, okay, everybody in this town is five nine or shorter. You are six foot four in eighth grade. Like, you're here. I need you to get the tip off. I need you to block shots and get rebounds. That is it. That is the only way you're making this tape. I said, okay, coach, I knew my role and I executed flawlessly.

SPEAKER_00 31:56

But I don't say so myself. I believe I finished an enforcer, man. Just start throwing both now.

SPEAKER_01 32:01

That's all I was. That's that's all I was. That's that's it. I I finished the season and we won the championship that year, and I'm talking like through the playoffs and everything like that, with like 20 total points in like 18 games. And I finished with 130 blocks and 115 rebounds. I knew my role. I knew my role, like then that's a scholarship for that. You would think that, but and then I got to high school and then kind of started to okay. I'm not that good at basketball, I'm not gonna be a shooter. Everyone's now as tall or taller than me, kind of like what you were saying going into college. It was kind of like when I hit height, I I grew very fast, very quickly. Like I said, I was 6'4 by the time I was in eighth grade.

SPEAKER_00 32:49

And I was the same way, man.

SPEAKER_01 32:51

Like I grew super fast quickly, and then everybody caught up and started passing me up. You know what I mean? And it's just like, yeah, but uh what am I gonna be like a shooting guard here, and I can't shoot the ball to save my life. And like I I I I block shots and I get rebounds. That's that's what I do, and it's gonna be a lot tougher here. Plus, kind of falls in the same season of swimming for me here, guys. So I I'm gonna swim instead. So my buddies were a little upset about that. But you know, yeah, I played every sport that I possibly could. I, you know, I I got a black belt in Taekwondo because I was I grew very fast and I was uncoordinated, and it helped me with coordination um too as well, you know. But that was still in that 12 to 14 range, 15, you know what I mean? And it was it it it helped me. Uh, you know, obviously you learn a bunch of different skill sets. You know, soccer helped with you know, hand-eye court or foot eye coordination, baseball, hand-eye coordination, swimming was just an entire body workout, football, you know, getting bigger, stronger, helping with the vertical and being able to jump off the blocks. It helped, you know, every sport helped me with something with swimming.

SPEAKER_00 34:00

Yeah, yeah, absolutely, man. Yeah, so there's a lot of advice. What I would say is if anyone wants to talk, just send me an email. Like my my email is on the website and just send me something, and I'm happy to give you a phone call or just send an email back and say, hey, here's what I would recommend for if you're trying to get to the next level, if you're 15 or 16 and just kind of working on your game or something like that. But the other thing that I think that kids need to realize is that it's not all about how good you are, it's about your work ethic and just like, are you interpersonal with the people around you? Because we have guys that maybe aren't the most talented in our gym, but they are just really good at making other people better and they just put themselves in the right place at the right time and they're feeding off some good energy all the time. Those guys are really valuable. And then I think another thing that applies to the real world here is like I don't know how you are, but I would rather hire like if I'm running a business, right? And I have to hire somebody who's a recent graduate from college. I would rather hire the 3-2 guy that maybe like missed a couple test scores or whatever, and has like a 3-0 to a 3-2. But you can sit down and have a beer with this guy and just have a great time and you enjoy being with them and working with them as opposed to the kid who's like super rigid and 4-0, and maybe you're a really book smart dude. But then, like when we're working on a project in the workplace, like you don't have any interpersonal skills, like that stuff matters too. And the best thing is like, hey, if you're that 4-0 kid who can do both, then awesome. More power to you. You're a super special dude. But I don't think it's all about book smarts, and that's where I think the college thing can be tough for a lot of kids because there are kids that are in a high school classroom that maybe like aren't meant to be in a desk and just sitting there and listening all day. And maybe they don't learn well in that type of environment and it makes their grades suffer. But then you get to college and you're learning things that you want to learn about. Let's say you're a bio major and just bio is your jam and everything else you could care less about, like that's where kids start to thrive and they turn from boys to men, right? And not to make a music reference, but like that's that's what I have have learned is like I could look at a kid's transcript and maybe he doesn't look like the best student, but you got to get to know a person. Um, so that's something that I wanted to throw out there too. It's like, hey man, if if you're not that classroom guy, A, that doesn't mean that college is not for you. And B, I don't think that any coach should be turning a guy away just because they don't have those top, top grades. Because every human's different, right?

SPEAKER_01 36:48

So I agree with that wholeheartedly. And as someone who Book Smart said bye-bye to a long time ago, you know what I mean? I you don't become a stand-up comedian because you're that 4-0 student, you know what I mean? So, you know, it I was more Street Smart's hands-on. I I learn as I go, and I've always said if you show me something, then help me do it the first time and then let me do it the third time. I know how to do that. Like that's how I learned, and that's what I tell people, you know, in interviews that I have to hold at my day job and stuff like that. And it's just like, look, I I'm not looking for the political correct interview answer. I just want to have a conversation with you. If you can hold a conversation with me, we can work with that. I can I can train and teach anybody to do anything, yeah. And if but you're not going to be able to do that.

SPEAKER_00 37:37

There needs to be some kind of like street smart test because we have all these book smart tests where like, okay, I'm good at the SAT, I got the ACT down, but it's like, where's the street smart test? Like, man, if I put this kid out in the middle of a Walmart, can he find his way home and make some friends on the way? You know, I don't know. But I figured that'd be sick.

Beach Vs Indoor Volleyball Explained

SPEAKER_01 37:57

Like that would be awesome. That would be absolutely awesome to have that. But yeah, like, you know, it's just people learn differently. And I want to get this in because I it's been I've been kind of curious about it, you know, you being the volleyball coach, and you know, there's indoor volleyball and beach volleyball. Which is harder, and why do you think that?

SPEAKER_00 38:18

Man, that's a great question. First of all, they're two different sports. They are two different sports. In my opinion, I would say sixes is harder. Because here's why the ball is traveling faster. There is more defined jobs that you have to do on the court, and you have to be incredibly good at that job to see a high level. I think to be a good beach volleyball player, you can get away with less physicality and you can be a smaller person in stature. You better be able to make up for it with quickness in the beach. I will say in beach volleyball, it's much harder to move because you're just instant, right? It's like, hey, like I am not able to move as quickly as I could on the on the hard court, I'm not able to jump as high as I would on hard court. So there are some things that make beach very challenging. But I would say if you take an average athlete and an above athl and above average guy, and you put them both on a sixes court, the average athlete is gonna struggle where the above average guy is gonna probably accelerate a little bit. If you put them on a beach court, it might be equal, if that makes sense. Yeah, so it's it's hard to describe with somebody who doesn't know the sport well. So I'm I'm trying to help you. But a good a good example is when I got out of college, I turned 25, and I was like, all right, I'm not able to play a lot of indoor in this area, but there is a lot of beach volleyball here. So I was like, all right, well, that's gonna like fill my urge to compete and still be active. And I'm going out, like I'm thinking, all right, I have all this experience playing the game of volleyball at the highest level. I have a really good arm, like I have all these skills that I've drilled and drilled and drilled. And then I'm playing against guys who have just played pickup sand for six years and they're carving me up because it's just a different sport, and I'm a little bit slower in the sand and I'm trying to bomb every ball and I'm hitting the ball out of bounds, and they're just shooting balls to deep corners and shooting over top of my block. But if if we take those same guys that are sand rats and we bring them into the indoor, it's like, hey, now this is the realm where the taller athletes, the guys that have the verticals, and the guys that have more of a dominance skill set from an athletic standpoint are probably going to take a step up, you know? So it's hard to say. And you you hit a hot topic in our world because like the beach guys are gonna say that beach volleyball is where the more complete players are, but the indoor guys are going to say, well, this is where the better athletes are. So it's like, dude, it's probably 50-50. I just have some experience with both, and I feel like I've seen such top-level athletes play in the indoor that it's just been mind-boggling. Like it's it's like, yeah, that guy, you put him anywhere and he's gonna dominate, you know.

Coaching Marriage Balance And Support

SPEAKER_01 41:21

Right. Yeah, that's always been a question that I've been curious about is, you know, in which which one would be harder, you know, and because I don't again, I don't know a lot about volleyball, but at the same time, like I see some of the highlights like on ESPN and stuff like that. And these guys are just like it's like, how do you how do you move that way? And how do you get from there to there that quickly, that quick around the court? And like it's just it it blows my mind a little bit there too, as well. But you've been coaching full time too as well, and you're also a married man, like you said. How do you balance that time?

SPEAKER_00 42:00

Yeah, so we don't have kids yet, so that helps.

SPEAKER_01 42:03

It definitely helps.

SPEAKER_00 42:04

And I'd I'd always want to be a father, like you know, but I will tell you any coach that's doing something at a at a semi-high level will say the same thing. Like, you have to have a really good wife if you're gonna be married, who understands the the demands of travel and the fact that to coach at this level is a lifestyle, right? So I'm on the weekends, I'm making some phone calls, I'm doing some Zoom calls with some kids that I'm trying to bring in because that's when they have the free time to zoom, right? There is a lot of times for four months from the month of January all the way through to the middle of April that I might be on the road for a game and I I have to miss a wedding. That has happened and it's it's tough to do, right? So you have to pick and choose spots with with that, but it takes what it takes to be a really good coach and to run a good program. So my my wife is amazing. And I think the thing that we figured out is like if you can integrate your wife or your spouse in what you're doing with your team and your program, then that helps. So she she knows all of our guys' parents. We have a lot of alumni that come over to our house like after they graduate, and we play cards with them and have drinks, and they know Carrie now and they're friends with Carrie. So that's how I balance it. It's just like, hey, you can be a part of this too. And no, you don't have the volleyball knowledge, but like you can make some relationships and go from there. I will tell you when we first got married, like there was some tough conversations about like, hey, why are you missing this wedding? Or like our family wants us to travel and go see them on this weekend. Well, I gotta go out to California for a five-day trip, and I'm not gonna be able to make that. And I think a lot of our family sometimes, when I first started, didn't understand like, why are you not just working a nine to five and then like you can do things on the weekends? It's like, yeah, it's just a different world.

SPEAKER_01 43:58

I wish we uh you had a job like that, you know. It's always been a dream.

SPEAKER_00 44:03

Like, I'm I'm not gonna lie, I think about that a lot. Like, what would that nine to five look like? And then, man, I get a Saturday where where I could wake up and just hang out with friends and watch some football, like and maybe do the same thing on Sunday too. Like, that'd be nice.

SPEAKER_01 44:16

Yeah, that would be. I I get it as a a comic, you know, like it's the travel therapy, as well. Yeah, and you know, my wife, as you know, we've been together 10 years, and she has missed a grand total of I think three shows in that time frame. Yeah, um one of which she had COVID, obviously. Can't can't do that. Another one, she had food poisoning. I wasn't gonna make her drive an hour and a half. It was a closure show, too. Uh, I wasn't gonna make her drive through that. Yeah, it was three. And another one I did a show a couple years ago in a prison where I was actually performing for the inmates, and she was not allowed, yeah. She was not allowed to come to that one, so based off of the prison rules. So, you know, it but she every video that you've seen up on me on YouTube or TikTok or anything like that, she films those. I've integrated her into like, hey, you you're gonna I need you to film this. This is my game tape to watch and post, and how I get seen to as well.

SPEAKER_00 45:18

So yeah, I was gonna say before, dude, it's a very similar lifestyle, like where you're doing some traveling and stuff like that. And I think, like, in my opinion, like, not to get sappy, but I think a good marriage is defined by like, are you able to support your spouse when they need it? And it sounds like your wife is there for you and doing everything that she she can to help you get better. And hopefully it pays off, man. And that's what we're hoping to. Like, there may come a day where my wife has a great job, she works from home, but her work may ask her to move at some point, and that may sacrifice me leaving my current job. And I'm willing to do that if she needs to move to make some more money for our family, right? But uh, dude, that's what a good marriage is all about, dude. Just video and some comedy shows, like that's what it's all about, man.

SPEAKER_01 46:05

Absolutely. She's yeah, and it's it's funny because she always films it and then she hates she hates her laugh. And it's in every video, and it's in every video of mine because she's she hears these jokes. Like it's not like I it's not like this is the first time she's hearing them, like she hears everything that I I work on. I I test them out on her before I go on to an open mic mic. And typically, if I get a what is wrong with you, it's like, yeah, that's a killer. That one's gonna be good.

SPEAKER_00 46:32

That's gonna be good. No, who is so who is the bigger critic? Like you of yourself or her of you?

SPEAKER_01 46:38

Me. It's always me. She's like, You did great. I'm like, I stumbled on a couple words here and there, you know, and I I look at the little things, like I kind of tripped over the the the cord of the mic, and I kind of like, you know, I yeah, I I paused, I I I know I said uh a lot, and it's just you know, it I I find those little things after doing it for so long that it's more she's like, but everyone laughed. Like, isn't that the the end goal? It's just like I mean, yeah, but like to be professional at it too as well, is where my mindset goes.

SPEAKER_00 47:14

Kind of stick it in that type of process, right? And just hey, like, I I need to talk as fluidly as I possibly can and just deliver the joke as best I possibly can.

SPEAKER_01 47:22

Deliver it and hit your lines, hit your hit your punches, because there's different punch lines in the middle of the joke before the main punch. Like, you gotta you gotta find that balance too as well.

Fast Five Questions And Closing Plug

SPEAKER_00 47:32

So, my my version of this is so I think it was back in 2022. I was playing in a beach volleyball league with a friend of mine, Dan Martin, who is and my wife and and her and his wife are really close now. So Carrie comes to this fan league, we're in the playoffs, okay? And it's in this like indoor place where it's like kind of tight courts, and like you can go get a beer and get some food and come onto the court and hang out and watch people play in the playoffs. So we're in the final, and you said that your wife like videos it and gives you like a little bit of feedback and stuff like that. So we're playing in the final, and it's like seven to seven, and Carrie is on the sideline just talking shit, and she's like, Kyle, that that sucked. That like that was a terrible pass. Like, why don't you hit the ball and bounds next time? I'm like, dude, what the heck? Like, you're supposed to be lifting me up here, you know. So we always joke about that now. It's like lift me up, don't put me down, you know.

SPEAKER_01 48:29

I get it because now my wife will she has heckled me on on stage. It's worked. Um in one competition only had five minutes on stage. And as a storytelling comedian to tell me I only have five minutes, I really gotta condense this joke. my jokes are at it every bit of 10 to 15 minutes long for one joke to to go through now there's side quests and stuff that you go through on the on the story but yeah yeah and I was doing a little bit of crowd work and I heard somebody say something I said who said that it sounded like a woman I looked over that another woman sitting by her and she read and I was like oh why like what you don't count for this part of like and and then like she she even says we'll talk about this later and it's like I'm sure we will on the hour drive home you know and everyone got a big laugh out of that and like it works sometimes too you know as well but I get that like I need that sometimes though that like hey you're doing you're doing pretty shitty I'm gonna I'm gonna try to get some crowd work going for you and it works so it's it's a good bounce but I wouldn't have it any other way but Kyle we are running down here near the end of the episode I didn't even realize how long we've been sitting here talking because it's it's great to have those kind of guests here but I do got to get this segment in because if I don't the wonderful manager of the podcast Johnny Fiddy Palcone will kill me and that is the fast biddy five and that is five random questions from the wonderful manager of the podcast Johnny Fiddy Palcone and Kyle these have nothing to do with what we've been talking about for the better part of 50 minutes here. So these are kind of rapid fire but you can elaborate if you need to so if you're ready we'll go ahead and get started. Let's do it all right question one what's the most overrated flavor of ice cream mid chocolate chip oh yeah well so that's a that's a tough one for me.

SPEAKER_00 50:22

Question two is ice cream in a cone or a cup better ice cream in a cone or a cup better I'm gonna say a cone cone yeah because you get to eat the cone too you get to get a little at the end of it question number three what's what's your favorite movie theater to go to see a movie at there was a movie theater I went to in Dallas Texas that was serving you food at your seat and I think it was an AMC but that was incredible like you could order a beer and food whatever and you didn't have you didn't have to get up and it came right to you that was amazing I had never been to one before and I think yeah like I think it was like 2023 I went to that was great that's that's awesome yeah I need to find one of those that's awesome yeah not everywhere with those with everybody nowadays question number four what's your favorite cereal my favorite cereal so this is a throwback for people that are millennials or born in the 90s there was a cereal in the 90s called waffle crisp that was incredible my second honorable mention is Captain Crunch with crunch berries yeah absolutely and question number five would you rather be a giraffe or a king cobra snake I would rather be a giraffe okay tall you could see above the trees and you could stomp those cobras out yeah absolutely yeah and I I I don't like snakes so yeah it would have to be a giraffe for me I don't want to be a snake absolutely well that was the fast 55 he took it a little bit easier on Nikyal than he normally does I I will I'll tell you that one I gotta stop by tomorrow and let him know I need some harder ones.

SPEAKER_01 52:06

Yeah absolutely absolutely he needs well he might is he's he might be on paternity leave he did just have his baby out there so yeah congratulations to him it's the first show I've had since you know he's had the baby so congrats to you fitty and Cassie there too Johnny's gonna be a great father man he he's gonna be an awesome father absolutely but Kyle like I said we are running down near the end of the episode and I do give every guest this opportunity at the end of every episode if there's anything you want to get out there whether it's something about volleyball BW or even if it's just a good message I'm gonna give you about a minute and the floor is yours.

SPEAKER_00 52:47

Yeah if anyone wants to come to some games we play in the middle of January all the way through April 15th ish. So if you've never seen a men's game please come play let me know and send me an email I'll get you some free tickets if you are looking for other ways to watch the sport the men's final four at the Division I level is going to be coming on here in about another week so you can look for that on ESPN plus I think it is on like May 5th ish. So go ahead and go look at that and if you've never seen a men's game before watch these dudes play every play is like an alley oop at 12 feet these guys are are crushing balls they're jumping super high. It's a fast paced game it's really fun and then I just want to thank you Mike for having me on this was awesome to learn about some con some comedy and stuff like that. And I love talking to you man this was great.

SPEAKER_01 53:39

Yeah absolutely man I I love it when people can promote what they have but I'm always grateful when everyone has a good time when they come on the show because you know I I do want to make the show like it is just two buddies shooting the shit at a bar having a couple drinks so appreciate you very easy to talk to and that and I look forward to keeping up I did not know when the men's volleyball season is now that I do I will definitely be checking that out and keeping in touch with you too as well but that is actually going to do it for this week's episode of the Ride Home Rants podcast. Again I want to thank my guest Kyle Mars for coming on the show and as always if you enjoyed the show be a friend tell a friend if you didn't tell them anyways they might like it just because you didn't that's gonna do it for me and I will see y'all next week