Let it be Their Dream; This has to be Their Journey - with Special Guests Jess and Dana Zeiss

Sam visits with Jess and Dana Zeiss, parents of 17 year old  elite gymnast Lexi Zeiss.  Lexi is a member of the United States national gymnast team.  

Jess and Dana talk about Lexi's rise to the top of gymnastic world.  They discuss how they raised a perfectionist goal oriented girl who was determined from a very early age to reach her goals.  

While many parents force their talented children to follow a path of their own choosing, Jess and Dana discuss how they let Lexi choose her own path.  

Follow Lexi Zeiss on Instagram: @lexizeiss2024 

Video of interview available:  
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TFEZMyGUXIk&t=57s

Transcript

Let it be Their Dream; this has to be Their Journey
Wed, Apr 05, 2023 9:15AM • 54:07
SUMMARY KEYWORDS
dana, gymnastics, gymnast, lexi, compete, talk, mindset, love, zeiss, years, alexei, jess, people, injury, watch, driven, sam, sport, competition, home
SPEAKERS
Intro, Sam Fischer

Intro  00:00
Welcome to cowboys, not eggheads, home of the brave, not home of the fearful. The world needs more cowboys and fewer eggheads. We're everywhere podcasts are found. So tell your fellow cowboys and let's keep the conversation alive on Instagram, Facebook and Twitter. Remember to subscribe rate review and share and now cowboys not a get we have Sam Fisher

Sam Fischer  00:33
well What a pleasure This is Jess and Dana's Zeiss two old, old they are old because I'm old two old friends two old friends that we're going to talk about their daughter today, Lexi Zeiss and I initially had the idea of interviewing Lexi Zeiss and I thought why why would I do that? I know her parents it'll be a much better story this way. And she probably want to be interviewed by me anyway. So welcome to cowboys not eggheads my my friends have a long time we go back I don't know 30 or 30 years now 30 But close 30 years probably close yeah degree Yeah. But just Jess and Dana have got a daughter who is pretty well known and gymnastic world and her name is Lexi Lexi Zeiss and I am going to just read from Wikipedia, you know, because we can PD is always so true. But you know how many people have daughters who have a Wikipedia entry. So you can tell me if it's right or wrong, and I'm just gonna start in 2022 Lexi recently and 2022 computers 22 or 2022 2022 World winner Cup where she fit finished 15th in the all round. Then in July of 2022, she was selected to come compete in the Pan American championships. And on the first day of competition, she finished second in in the all around behind someone from Brazil who I can't name I can't pronounce and third on the bounce beat being behind two gals. During the team final. Lexie competed on vault balance beam and floor exercising help floor exercises, helping the United States win silver behind Brazil. At the end of the competition. She was awarded the sportsman Award for Excellence respect and friendship very important things to me Good job guys. By the PanAmerican gymnastic union in August of 2022, she competed in her first national championships. She finished seventh in the all around and was named to the national team for the second time in October 2022. She decided she was going to become a LSU Tiger Go Tigers. It's a great school but I've been there on campus it's a great place. Later that month, she was selected as a traveling Delta alternate for the 2022 World Championship team. And during the team final, less he was on the competition floor supporting the team as they won their sixth consecutive gold medal 2023 That's this year she competed in the winner Cup where she won the all around competition. That's a big deal. As a result, she was named to the team to compete at the di t be pokel Team Challenge and stuck guard is that right how you say that Stuttgart Germany Stuttgart Stuttgart Stuttgart. And I know that she suffered it's public information right that she's she she, she suffered an injury. So she's she's, we can talk about that a little bit. How that's probably, you know, injuries, just in our time before your injuries are actually sometimes blessings in disguise. And if you're an athletic if you're an athletic, elite athlete like she is, it happens. So I kind of wanted to start just by asking if you know, Jess, I know that you're a baseball player. Don't College. Yet, but dude, come on this. This girl is on the world stage. Where did this come from? Yeah,

04:23
it's it's been an amazing ride. I tell you what we we I don't think any of us could have predicted that. This is where she would be but you know, from a young age, you know, she's she's been a very you know, a focused, young lady. She's a what Dana calls a box checker. It'd be amazing Sam sometime off the show. You know, she has a list in the side bedside table of all the things she wanted to accomplish as a gymnast back when she was three and four years old. And it's amazing that those boxes have all been checked. And there's one that hasn't been

Sam Fischer  05:00
When did she first met if I'm sorry, interrupt, but when did she first make that list? How old was she?

05:05
She's probably, I don't know, seven, eight years old.

Sam Fischer  05:09
She made that seven or eight year old.

05:12
Yeah, she did. She made it. It was. It was probably what does that mean? For her second grade, she developed this list. And it was actually part of a little project they did at school. And so she brought it home and she laminated it and put it in her drawer. And when we were moving her to Minnesota was the first we've seen this list and we're going through her drawers and pull out this list. And it really is just she's a box checker. That's how she sets her goals. Like what's next. Okay, what's next and so on. Hmm.

Sam Fischer  05:46
So I've got through my entire life. gymnasts. But yeah, what's next? I love it. Yeah,

05:53
yeah. So she's she's definitely had some success doing it that way. I think that's how she's she's driven. She's very goal oriented, but she has to see that in front of her. She has to write it down. Just to practice it. She has to live it she has to check it when she moves on. So

Sam Fischer  06:13
tense drive discipline. Strong, and but she's balanced. Did a little homework today and listen, really listen to a couple podcasts of hers and read some articles. The one thing that I that strikes me about Lexi is she's, she's in gymnastics, you have to be balanced. But boy, I think she's pretty balanced as a person. And she seems like she monitors that a little bit. Do you guys do you agree with that? Or am I wrong on my off on that?

06:42
No, I mean, that we we want people to know her as Lexi who is a gymnast, and on a gymnast named Lexi. Because, you know, gymnastics is only going to go so long, right? I mean, when they're 2425 years old, I mean, they're done. They're retired. But I think that that has helped her in her gymnastics world that, you know, she, she knows really what's important in life. I mean, being kind, being respectful. You know, she's an only child. So part of that is by you know, she's been around us the whole time and, and we've had adult conversations around the dinner table since she's been young age. So I think that has helped her. But she's a very again, she's just a very kind kid, and we're very proud of what she's done. And, and I think that's that's been part of the reason why she has been successful.

Sam Fischer  07:38
She. The other thing that I really noticed was my guess if I shook Lex Lexi's hand, she would give me a pretty firm handshake. And she also something very interesting that I noticed is when she was being interviewed on NBC, this recently, in Louisville. She looks straight at the camera. You know, it takes a lot of guts to look straight, straight at a camera. I thought it just set up I thought it was just set everything right there.

08:09
Yeah, so we talked a lot about life skills, right? Again, one day gymnastics will be over. But you got to have the skills to continue on in this life as Lexie, the person not like see the gymnast. And those things are to look people in the eyes. When you speak to them, and you, you have two ears and one mouth, listen first and then and then respond and be kind, you'd be respectful. We just that's always been our expectation. And I hope that I it makes me proud that you see that come through in her gymnastics because being humble is incredibly important to us. And I always tell her, there's little girls out there that want to be you. So in your good times, and in your times when we call them learning moments. We don't call them failures, but the meats that don't go as planned and become learning moments. Those are just as important for those little girls to be watching how she responds. So we talk a lot about that stuff. And I know sometimes when she walks out the door and we give one last reminder, she's like Mom, I know. So, but I just I hope that the sport between the sport and as I hope we've positioned her to be a good human. Well

Sam Fischer  09:29
you have I mean, there's no doubt about it. I mean, she wants sportsmen award and I love I love that you're teaching those skills. As a young kid, I, one of the first things I learned and I wasn't old at all. I was probably five or six years old. But when we would go to a place called Allah Millie's and Valentine, Nebraska, there's just a diner there, but mom and dad didn't order the food. Sam ordered the food and Sam was to look to look directly in the eyes of those, the waiter or waitress and clearly say, what the order was so good for you. I mean, those are those are great life skills. And the proof is in the pudding. So so good job. That's awesome. Thank you. I was going to ask you, Dana, I had a question specifically for you. And you kind of kind of mentioned this, but maybe you can go a little deeper. I think you just said this. But why are you proud of Alexei aside, forget the athletic accomplishments, but what how are you proud of Lexie, Outside of athletics?

10:40
Right. So the other thing, one of our other big messages at home is you can need your brain a lot longer than you need gymnastics. So we told her early on when she started down, and she told us she wanted to go down the ceiling path, we knew that we knew what that meant. Most elites in this country, don't go to traditional school. And so Jess and I really dug our heels in and it took a lot of balancing and support from our jobs to be able to Hey, run out in the middle of the day, pick her up, get her to the gym, but we kept her in traditional school through her freshman year in high school, which is a miracle.

Sam Fischer  11:18
When did the practice hours really pick up probably a freshman in high school as I'm picturing or eighth grade, so

11:24
sick. Sixth grade is when we started going, she started going in that like 26 to 28 hours a week. So she'd go practice in the morning, come back to school, go after school. So it was a lot of maneuvering around for all of us. But our family philosophy is we can do anything for a little while. And that's kind of how Jess and I check our boxes to kind of help her achieve her goals. But basically, what I'm most proud of is she's a very good student. She has a 4.0 and that's very important for her. We almost got it almost got a B plus last semester in life was close to ending like it was

Sam Fischer  12:09
for her for you. She's a perfectionist. She's a perfectionist. Yeah. Will you tell her see plus kind of fell and I'm doing just fine. And you're doing just fine. Just a little bit above average? Not much.

12:25
Yes, so um, but no, I just I'm proud of of that I'm proud of you know that she'll stop when she's walking into the gym and some little girl has the same Leo on his her and wants to get a picture. She when we were at the US championships her and one other girl signed every single autograph in in the arena like they were asking us to leave. And I when I asked her why she did that she said because I remember when I was that little girl. And so to me it's it's so much bigger than her gymnastics. Like I I kind of love watching her gym gymnastics. It's incredibly stressful. But I I like watching her do all those other things that make me just so proud of the human she is. So

Sam Fischer  13:15
now we're going to skip ahead here a little bit from what a nurse so just just so nice to see you. Congratulations, you got to see your daughter with your own two eyes. What just recently?

13:30
Yeah, well, it was funny, because when we were in Brazil in July, I was kind of one of those where I would be all over the arena and I would watch certain events and one event I would not watch was beam because it would just it stresses me out. Well, when we went to Rio, like she said, You have to watch Dana said you have to watch we're traveling all that way. And so we're in the arena, there's about 10 or 12 Americans and their resilience. And it was like a soccer match. I mean, they were vocal and loud and everything night and I got stuck in a in a crowd. So right on the end of the beam, so she was coming out

Sam Fischer  14:10
and I did you think oh my gosh. I had to watch. Good right?

14:18
I thought I thought she did fall because she was so crooked on the beam. I went like this. The next day I look up and she's saluting and I stayed on.

Sam Fischer  14:28
But how is it? I mean, it's my view now. I mean, I mean, I'm like mad because I Well, I'm not on the balance beam but I sort of know gymnastics through through this little silly thing I've done for last eight years called CrossFit and we do a lot of stuff like that and so I've got I've been to a lot of competitions as far as like CrossFit. A lot of it is gymnastics related. But yeah, I mean I get I get a little butterflies I don't even I don't even know Alexei I you know What is it? Like? I mean, is your mouth dry? I mean are you like shaking? Is your heart like elevated now Dana I'm I guess she's cool as a cucumber I go up and touch her she probably like ice. You Zeiss. I think you'd be a hot tamale baby. Yeah,

15:17
I think I think we're

15:19
both have a better poker, it's

15:21
just we show exactly show in different ways. Sam, the thing that yeah, that's the thing about it is, you know, the sport is when you when you think of all the other sports, baseball, right, you get three strikes, or you get four at bats football, you get another play golf, you get another swing. But in this, you have one chance, right. And you train for 30 hours a week for about five minutes a competition. And if you're if you fall off an apparatus, these girls, there's 35 of these senior elite gymnasts across the country, and they're all really, really good. And you have to stay on the apparatus. And one of the things that she's been really good at, and she's she's from her mindset is that she's been pretty consistent. And so she just has a pretty good mindset that that has allowed her to do. I would say, that's the hardest part.

16:13
There's no second, always have that mindset, though. Like, people think they train just gymnastics. We she went through a period where she wasn't consistent. And she was asking for more. And we, you know, actually set her up with a mindset coach, sports psychologist, a sports psychologist. He's been amazing with her and just that learning that mindset of how to we near mirror. So it is, and I would say when you look at her gymnastics now, I would say that's 75% of it. Yeah,

Sam Fischer  16:47
yeah, she can do all this stuff. You can do it, you can do it. It's yeah. And that's what separates any athlete at any level. I don't care if it's LeBron James or, you know, rich, Froning, and CrossFit, or it's all about between the ears, the mental edge. And just breathing. And I'm interested in like, I'd love to talk to her about her breathing, because she's, you know, you don't have to go right away, you have 30 seconds on the floor. And so you should I would fire I'd take well, you take advantage of what, what you need to get to where you think you can start and there's no rush. There's no rush to start the damn thing. So, I mean, I would love to talk to her about her breathing patterns. I mean, there's this thing called seal breathing that I try and do that doesn't work for me. But Navy SEALs use it. It's a technique. Yeah, slows your heart rate down. I've just be fascinated know, all those techniques. I mean, you know, her breathing and your visual issues. I'm sure she visualizes. I mean, she talks to herself, right? That's part of the process. That's awesome. I love that. Love that, by the

17:55
way, but to see her grow during that, like he's worked with her. Since she was, yeah, she's the youngest person he's ever worked with. Right. And she wouldn't talk to herself because she found that to be embarrassing, right? She's like, that's kind of weird. I'm talking to myself. And people are looking at me like, No, right and, or even just being able to touch your diaphragm to really get in control of your, of your breathing. And as she grew, like, like just mentally grew and, and even just matured in age, and bought into those strategies, it's been fun to see her implement them know when to use them and to see her gymnastics improved, because of the minute dramatically

Sam Fischer  18:40
and really, I mean, within the last year or two, right? I mean, just

18:46
Yes. Yep. Correct. Yep.

18:50
Yeah. And Sammy, if you if you go back to the winner cup that you were talking about in just a few months ago. There's a nice clip when they when they're showing her on TV that she has a G unit on her wrist. And G G stands for good enough. And you talked about it right when we started that she was trying to be a perfectionist. And so that mindset and that strategy has helped her get to a point to where her gymnastics takes over, because her mind is so calm, and so that's good enough, but she's a perfectionist.

Sam Fischer  19:24
I wonder if she follows David Goggins. It's worked for her guy, but he's little. You guys ever heard of David Goggins?

19:30
I have Yeah, I have. He's, he's

Sam Fischer  19:33
incredible. Yeah, and the writing on the hand stuff is great. I mean, my crossfit coach does that she writes she'll write words like impact just on her hand. I mean, yeah, I told her if she likes to work Daisy, she like raises like daisies be nice to people and whatever works for them to ever get me to frickin writer Daisy on my hand.

19:59
Anyway, But she struggled, she has struggled with perfectionism since like, little like it's, we we knew that it was going to at some point probably be crippling to her, which is where we got, I can still remember in second grade, they had spelling tests, and she came out of school, it was March and she was hysterically crying when she got in the car, and I was like, oh, gosh, girl drama already. And so she gets in, and I was like, What is going on, and she missed her first spelling word of the year. And she was furious, because she had not missed a spelling word all year. And I was like, we have a long road ahead of us here. So just we've noticed she has she had those traits very early, which I think those those things have helped her become a lead, but

Sam Fischer  20:51
she handled them properly, and she's channeled them properly. And she's more she's, she's, she's recognized and she's matured, because she's recognized that she's not perfect. But she's channeled that in such a way where she's gotten so you know, is it good or bad? Well, it's a big part of who she is and good for her. But again, you know, it's okay to get a C once in a while. It's all right. You're gonna

21:18
make it I'll be calling you will be calling you. Oh,

Sam Fischer  21:20
yeah. You want to put Sam Sam Sam, the psychologists here. Yeah.

21:29
That Sam that you and me

Sam Fischer  21:30
were six or she get this person's

21:33
gonna get one of those. But you know,

21:36
no, I think we all in our house tend to be a little tight. I think we're all wired that way a little bit. But I think honestly, how many times do you hear people say that they're just wired differently. And we've noticed that about her since she was little, you know, people would say, Oh, she's blessed with with athletic ability. She's blessed with this. She's blessed with that. Actually, it was just that she had a she had just a different killer instinct to her when she played soccer when she was little. She wanted the ball. Every sport. Yes. So I think, you know, I think we all are perfectionists in our house. But I think she just has a way different drives like me when we recognize that quite early. So

Sam Fischer  22:30
what that just

22:32
Yeah, part part part of that. Just to add on to that part of that is, I think Dana and I have always strived to be as good as we can in anything we do. Right? Whether it's playing golf on a Sunday afternoon, or going to work and being the best nurse practitioner you can be or the best investment banker you can be. And I think it's rubbed off a little bit on her. That, you know, again, it's about doing things 100% to your ability. I mean, if, if you're gonna do something, you're gonna

Sam Fischer  23:04
say to my principal, I was recently asked

23:06
to write down the way it is.

Sam Fischer  23:10
And that's it. That's it. I mean, it was last time you two wrote down your principles. I mean, it's and I bet you if I asked Lexi right now, what her four principles are, she'd be able to rattle them off right now. She knows. And you know, you're talking about are things like, integrity, you're talking about things like authenticity, you're talking about things like finishing the job. Don't take shortcuts. Those are three of mine, by the way. So she sounds like a pretty mature young lady.

23:43
Yeah, when we, when we when she was little, she would we would have her fold clothes, right? And so sometimes she wouldn't want to do that. And she would fold a washcloth and it would be not very good. Right? And so I would give it back to her and I would say if you were on the beam, would you want this score? Because right now as I'm looking at it, it's an eight eight right? And I tell me what you want on the beam? And she would recall that to a tee. So right you can you can teach your kids early on doing the right thing and striving to ensure she still remembers that she still remembers having to do nine five beam folds. Right? That's learning to do it the right the right thing early. Right.

Sam Fischer  24:27
Absolutely. Absolutely.

24:32
And we talked we talked with her also, Sam one of the things that I was always taught is I told Lexi I said character means doing the right thing and nobody's watching you.

Sam Fischer  24:42
That's my number one. Now, you both know me and we both know that I strive for principles are not set in stone necessarily by striped principle.

24:53
No, but it's the little thing just like you're walking you know you're walking in a in an arena or something. So there's a wrapper on the floor do you pick it up? Or do you walk by it? And so those are the type of things that we're trying to pick the right thing when nobody's watching, it is so

Sam Fischer  25:09
awesome. Awesome. I knew this would be great. What else here? Now she sat you she said. So one of the reasons I wanted to talk to you guys is is because I know you both. And I know for a fact that you Jessen Dana Zeiss did not push her in any one direction. You weren't. You weren't hovering you weren't your, you know, last person to yell at a referee to game would be you too, right? You just that's not I think we're all about same age. And we kind of look at the world the same a little bit. And so she sat you down, when she I don't know if it's the method for moving to Minneapolis, or was it the change, but she, she said you didn't sit her down and said, here's what you're gonna do. It's never been that way. Correct. It's, it's always she's always she's driven the boat, or driven the ship. And you all have just supported her. Talk about that.

26:15
So I'll start and then I'll let just take over when he got sat down. So her and I went to the Olympic trials, and we met another family there. That's actually a family at the gym that we moved to. And we went into the Olympic trials with a woman, her and I were driving home and she just said, I love my gym. I love my coaches. But if I want to be here, I think it's time for me to change. And so I said, okay, and I tend to be a little less reactive. Just as a safe comment. Okay.

Sam Fischer  26:54
Dad, I'm moving to Minneapolis. See ya.

26:58
And so I said, Yeah, okay, team, tell me how that looks. And I said, you know, before we pitch this to your dad, you need to do some, you need to do some, some work here. And so what I tasked her with is, I needed, you know, five reasons to stay fine. You know, I mean, I wasn't why do more, right? i She was only 15 years old. I need five reasons why you want to leave. And then I need you to put down five gyms in order that you would potentially want to visit and why you think that gym would help you, you know, achieve your next goal. So we got home and she was done with it that night. And I was like, Okay, well, this isn't going away. So I just said, okay, okay, so I think now, you know, this is going to be a big change for our family. But I think now we need to kind of bring dad into the mix and see what he thinks. And so just maybe you take it from there.

28:03
Yeah. Well, I mean, a couple of things in the serious note, you know, part of the thing I was thinking about is, you know, whether my work now, if there's a blessing in disguise with COVID, it proved that you can work from home, at least in my business. From Dana's standpoint, being a nurse practitioner, she's got to be on site more, so I'm going to have to be spending a lot more time in Minneapolis. And, you know, working for the company I've been working for for 26 years. It wasn't even a question. They said, Absolutely. You go do it. We are supportive. I mean, right. I mean, First National Bank is just, that's who they are. So that was the first thing I got past that. But, you know, I just didn't know if it was the right move, because I didn't know what was gonna happen, right. I mean, just from a family dynamic. You have a house up there. You have a house here, school while she was loving school, west side was great. She loved going to Westside. So all those things were going through my mind. But you know, honestly, Sam, I'm sitting behind my desk right now. So she sat right here, I sat on the other side, and she went through these things. And she laid out what she wanted to do what she was trying to accomplish. And, you know, I dug my heels in, I honestly did not want to go and then a couple of days of back and forth. I knew that this is something that she wanted to try, and that we have the ability to do it. And at the end of the day, we we drove up there on a Saturday or Sunday. She started gym the next day.

Sam Fischer  29:37
And the results, the rest is history, the results.

29:41
Nominal she knew that this was the place have proven. And I think it's important to understand that it wasn't anything that was going wrong in the gym here. We loved Oga. She loved her coaches, she loved her teammates, but it's just like anything sometimes where you hit the end of the runway a And she just she needed to take that next step. Most importantly, she needed teammates, she

Sam Fischer  30:05
makes a difference training guys. I mean, when you're when you're when you're training with some you're so far above everybody else, and that's what get in with your peers and get your butt kicked once in a while. It's a big deal. And that's, that is where it is. I mean, exactly like I understand it. Yeah. Yeah.

30:26
And it took us I don't know, they know it says it took us a while to get into a cadence. But six, eight months later, you know, we have a pretty good cadence going now where it feels like,

Sam Fischer  30:38
Well, normal. A home. I mean, a house is just a house like it's normal. So I mean, you know, you made it you made it work. Correct. made it work. Yep. Great story.

30:52
I did tell Jess and US Alexei, I sit down and I'll talk about it. And it was kind of a last night before we were going to decide. And I said, he said, What do you think? And I said, I'm ready to go. And I said, What do you think? And he said, I don't know. And I said, All right. Here's the deal. You go to bed tonight, and you wake up tomorrow with a decision. And if you don't want to go then you get to share that with her in the morning. And he's like, I'm not talking to her in the morning. I'm she's already had me in the den behind the desk one. So we're going so we never looked back. And our thing was, this is not a deficit. If we get there and we don't like life is temporary man. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. So it's fine. Yeah. So we got Jess on board we worked on Yep.

Sam Fischer  31:39
And some things just don't change. It's hilarious. Listen. Yeah. So I mean, what makes Lexi tick? Why is she motivated? What what? I mean, what, what is her motivation? What I mean, I bet you guys recently watched the 30 for 30 thing on Michael Jordan. I mean, the stuff that that guy is such an elite level and the stuff that he used for motivational purposes. What are some of the what, what motivates Lexi? What makes her tick?

32:12
Take a jessamy.

32:16
Well, I mean, so again, I think I think it started way back when I brought it up earlier about her little sheet where she had boxes, right? She's always wanted to compete, or always want to go to a national team, camp, Czech national team, all these events, when do this, get a college scholarship. And so I think it's the the next thing in mind that she's trying to accomplish. And one of the things Sam is is, and Dana can attest to this, if you tell her she can't do something, or she doesn't have the ability to do something, she was gonna do everything in her power to prove you wrong. So she's not a what if person, we were not a what a family. So she's just like, well, what if I tried this? What if I did this? What if I did this? Because she hates looking back and say, I wish I would have done that, or I wish I would have done that. So I think it's you dangle a carrot in front of her. She's going for it. And for some reason, she just is like Dana said, it's one of those things. She just wired a little differently than most people and, and honestly, she's embraced everything about the sport of gymnastics, I think people lose perspective that it's more than going out and flipping on a beam and doing the bars. A lot of it is about eating properly. Recovering the physical therapy, getting enough sleep. The recovery, the mindset, you're working with a sports psychologist, I mean, it's, you know, years ago that was frowned upon that was like, well, you're struggling, you can handle it. And that's why you got to use somebody, it's just the opposite for her. It's, he's he's done such a good job at bringing her down from perfectionism to being good enough. That I think she's embraced all the aspects that go on with the sport that I think some habits I think that's what's helping her. She's seeing winning work.

Sam Fischer  34:08
She's a winner. So

34:09
I don't know, Dana, do you have

34:10
I think too, she's a pretty gritty kid. You know, just to qualify a lead was really difficult for her early on in the process and just to never give up. She's a grinder and she kind of has a motto where she's she's got a she's not an Oh, no, she's the let's go and she'll say she looks over his shoulder and if somebody just put up a big score, she's like, I don't say oh, no, she because I turned around and I'm like, Alright, let's go. So she has some little thing little phrases in her head that shift her focus and get her into the right mindset and make her tick and and go she's dealing

Sam Fischer  34:51
with the injury right now, which is probably was probably one of the is this one of her. I'm sure she's had tons of injuries. But first of set, it's a setback. What she? How is she dealing with the injury? Was there a little bit of grief period? Or did she just take it on? Okay, well, we got to do what's next. I mean, it's it's again, it's nutrition, it's it to me injury is. And I'm only taking this on an amateur CrossFit person who doesn't compete, like compete every day against me. But I've had injuries, I've had this and I've had that and I, I mean, I, I'm dialed in on nutrition, I have a nutrition coach, I have, you know, all this stuff. So I know about nutrition, and I know about recovery and all these things. And an injury. I had an injury a couple years ago. And it really forced me to refocus on some things. Because injury doesn't hamper you necessarily. It might limit one, one, you know, she she has ankle injury. So she obviously she can't, there's certain things you can't do. But she could still swing on a bar, right? She can still do uneven bars, or whatever I assume, well, she had the land doesn't cheat. But I mean, there's technique things that she can probably be working on. And that's what I found is also that I got better at technique, and everything slows down and you're you're you're dialed in on nutrition or dialed in on recovery, your all these things. So she taken this as an what's next challenge or how she doing? How's she doing?

36:20
So when it happened in Germany, she we ended up with the hospital and they brought her in a booth and something else and she said, I don't really need any of your equipment. I'm gonna take my ankle and I'm competing tomorrow and she just was standing there and she goes, Let's go down. And she's like, okay, and so I told the the USA medical staff was amazing. And I was like, okay, like, let's we know she can't compete. We're all looking at her ankle. But let's let her get there herself. Right. And she will but I think we all know that when we can't do something if mentally we can get there ourselves. It's a whole lot easier on our hearts. Right? It took her a while but she got there. And when she came home, she was ready to roll. What do I need to do to get better? You're so right. She the the one thing he told her though is while you're in this cast, you have to do what you're told. And she was supposed to be in the cast two weeks. And he she said, Oh, good. So when I come out of the cast in two weeks, then I can start swinging bars. And he said, Well, you just earned yourself a third week. No, you can't start swinging bars. So he's been really good about being very specific about her timeline because I think gymnasts are wired a little differently. And you know, in the past gymnasts were expected to compete injured, right? That's the old regime from USA Gymnastics. It's not that way anymore. But we have focused in on you know, you can still do upper body you can do Pilates.

Sam Fischer  37:56
You can be more mobile, you can you can maintain flexibility, gain increased flexibility, and you get stronger. Yeah, he's lifting weights. And boy, She's stronger. She whip you too. She whipped me these jealous kids for every square inch of her. She's strong man. Yeah, anyway, yeah.

38:13
So she's I think no, I think what she's done and I you know, I think it kind of bummed her out. Not kind of it did, but I think she's mindset right. She's used her mindset training to think okay, what do I need to do? So that when this is done, I can get back to where I am. So that's where we are right now. I'm not gonna lie. She's driving Justin I a little bit crazy at the moment because this girl is not used to being home. Right? Um, she's she's thinks she can do more than she can. But she's, she's done a good job. Good. Sounds good. And so she her body needed? Like,

Sam Fischer  38:46
is she back in classes? West Side or she just at home? Of course.

38:50
She goes, yeah, she goes to the University of Nebraska. They have a virtual high school. I bet most people don't even know that. So that's actually who she does her program through. So yep, she can get get ahead on homework and do those

Sam Fischer  39:03
but having friends around. Does that keep Lexi balanced? A little bit? Yeah,

39:09
yeah, I mean, one of the Dana can attest to this, I think it's important to note that you can compete and train and do all this at a very high level, but still maintain a normal somewhat of a normal life. One of the things that we've been very adamant and and sometimes push back a little bit from her coaches in Minnesota is she went to homecoming at West Side last year, she came back for a couple of birthdays. And so the one thing that we've we've been cognizant about is that, you know, we didn't ever want her to get to a point to where it's like, why I missed out on this. I missed out on that. One day here one day, they're missing training for a birthday party or homecoming or prom or something like that. It's very important. She went to the west side State football championship two years ago, and so far Things like that have allowed her to kind of maintain a normal teenager life, but still be able to train and do what she's done. And we've been very adamant on that. And, and she's actually even thanked us a couple of times for that. And it's meant that much to her and we remain adamant.

40:16
I just don't ever want her to look back and say, Wait, what happened? Where did my childhood and teen years go? You know, and I, and everyone else say, Oh, she would never do that. Look at the success she's had. But again, gymnastics is going to end and those successes are gone. But what were what about all those other experiences? So

40:35
Right? Which is why you said earlier, Sam about she's driving the bus. We've never driven the bus Dana and played college basketball, I played college baseball, not at a not at a huge high level. But you still played at a at a college level. We had our time. It's her time now. It's first. It's her whatever she wants to do, we're here to support her to do well.

Sam Fischer  40:58
So actually, one of my questions is and you've essentially answered it, you know, athletes are sometimes lost when the days of competition are over. Are you concerned about that transition? Obviously, you're preparing you have since they weren't prepared for that transition? Would you know and like yeah, like, yeah, realistically, her her her shelf life is what another four? She's 17. So she's got about another eight years, maybe?

41:28
Maybe? Yeah. So it's interesting, though, like she is in control. She wants to be in control of how when gymnastics ends. So because she doesn't have enough going on. Haha, she's already she's already studying to become a judge for gymnastics, because in her brain, when gymnastics is over, that's how I can still stay involved. Right. So I think she's looking ahead to, to really when she bows out, how's that gonna look? I don't have to totally go away. I can be involved in a different way. Yeah.

42:05
Well, I was just gonna say, even beyond gymnastics, you know, she wants to be a dermatologist. So you know that there's going to be some some schooling that's going to take a while and some hard schooling so never.

Sam Fischer  42:17
Well, that's good.

42:21
But, but she's, she's got goals beyond gymnastics. She's

Sam Fischer  42:26
good for those two as well. I want to meet her. I want to meet her now. Yeah. Yeah, I want to get her autograph.

42:37
Yeah, I don't know if I want her to meet well, I'll

Sam Fischer  42:39
bring heathered always equals I don't know if I want her to. Yeah. Absolute Truth. Jess, you so you, we talked a little bit about, you know, you're not wanting to watch her. Did you? Do you have any superstitions that you that you go through prior to her competitions, though?

43:04
Sure. There's certain things that I wear during the when she was the all she was the second all around in. In Brazil. So every meet that she's been at, I ordered the

Sam Fischer  43:18
newest I knew super eye. Exactly, exactly. I'm a baseball guy. That's why

43:27
baseball players are superstitious. It was it was interesting at winter cup. I watched her first. Her first event was her first event then in which she started obeying. So I watched it over with Dana and then my brother in law and Dana's family was on the other side in the rain. So I walked over there to watch flora and she she did both really well. Then I went over and went with Dana to watch vault and then I went back over to watch bars and so I'm like I gotta keep going back and forth because it's working. So yes, I am very superstitious, not prepared

44:03
or you're not you either do what you know how to do or you don't you get in your right mindset or you're not

Sam Fischer  44:08
okay. The ultimate question of what who's whose daughter is this does Alexei Yeah, many quirky habits or superstitions.

44:19
I would say not superstitions, except she's very. Like, if you watch out herself talk, it's always the same. So I would say more consistent. She's very consistent about how she approaches each thing. It all Yeah. Ken has to say I don't want her to be superstitious. Come on. Just.

44:45
She's not I agree with you, Dana. She's, she has she has a way that she goes about her business. And, and it's pretty consistent with how she does it how her approach is to being versus it is the floor versus and it's she has a If one approach for each one of those events, and it's consistent with how she approaches it,

Sam Fischer  45:03
you too have given her freedom to make huge lifetime choices. What advice would you give to other parents who are in a similar situation of raising a superstar athlete?

45:16
So what I would say is, first of all, I'm i We are such a believer in in letting your kids try all different kinds of things. Like she played volleyball, she played basketball, she did track she did swimming. She did golf. I mean, literally, we had her soccer, we had her in everything. Because we wanted her to see where what what did she love? Where did her interests lie. But I think most importantly, let it be their dream. You can't want it more than your kids. We see people along the way that that do. And you know, there was a girl that has been in the Elite system for a long time. And we just saw the other day, she totally quit the sport. And if you put that kind of pressure on on them, they already put enough pressure on themselves and the love for it. It probably won't be there long term. But our family beliefs are we can do anything for a little while. We always do it together, we will leave no stone unturned. We don't decide what that stone is just and I don't. She gets to decide, You know what, what is it that she needs next to help her be successful. And if it's something that the two of two of us can put in position for her, we absolutely will help her. But this is her dream. And it is absolutely her dream. So I'm not going to say it's not fun. It's been a fun.

Sam Fischer  46:49
Rio we've been we just had an iron Rio for 10 days. It was great, right? Yeah. And you're up. Do you? So do you enjoy it when you? I mean, do you like go and do other stuff? You do? I mean, she's stuck somewhere. But you go do stuff, right? Yeah, yeah. Good. Good. Yeah.

47:08
Good. Yeah. I would say I would add a little bit to what Dana was saying to Sammy is that this has to be their journey. I think so many times you hear Hey, your daughter could be the next Gabby Douglas could be the next Simone Biles, whatever. And then like, I just want my daughter to be the next Lexi's ice, right. I mean, there's, there's once you start putting that pressure on these kids, it becomes not enjoyable. And her sports psychologist has always ended his conversations, at least this is what Lexi's told us. Is that like, Are you having fun? Are you enjoying it and she goes, I'm having a blast. And he goes, once you lose your enjoys work,

Sam Fischer  47:49
that's where he's more. I mean, it might be tiresome for right now, but it's not worked. And

47:54
so yeah. And, and I also and I also would tell parents that, you know, what, if your daughter is a level eight or a level nine, have them be the best level eight or level nine they can be, they don't have to be an elite gymnast to be a good gymnast or to be successful or whatever. Don't push them beyond their limits, and to get them to a point to where they're not enjoying the sport. And that's what our whole thing is, is, if as long as she's enjoying it, we will continue to support it and give her the means to be successful. But that, to me is the I

Sam Fischer  48:31
have one more little bizarre question. I'm going to ask you since I don't have kids, I have opinions. So I'm the biggest world's biggest hypocrite, biggest hypocrite in the world. I can talk about somebody's people's kids and how they handle them. And but I don't have kids. So I don't know anything. first to admit that. So she's been to a lot. I mean, she was a lot of games growing up, and so forth and so on. And I see a lot of parents, that their lives are absolutely dictated by their sports schedules. And that's fine. I mean, whatever. But have you ever missed a soccer game or a basketball game or the game that she participated in that you just your life happened? You couldn't go

49:21
I will take that one. And I will say one time.

Sam Fischer  49:25
And how did that? How did that make you feel? Just nice. Were you guilty? Did you feel like you're a rotten parent or did you feel like this is I can't make it today?

49:35
Well, I was in the hospital

49:42
so it was in the US championship last year. I got sick and in Tampa and I missed. Yeah, I

Sam Fischer  49:51
mean, I listen. And I'm just talking about rubber mill soccer. I'm not talking about the United States championships. Yeah, it would have crushed you Yeah, that was, I would say she's like that was it. But but if you I mean, we, we never had she's tougher than you, Dana, if you if you ever missed a game of hers, would you feel guilty about it? Growing up?

50:13
Um, no, I wouldn't feel guilty because I will I will have known two things. Number one, I would have only met I would have tried everything I could not to miss. So I would have, I would, I would have exhausted everything to do that. But also Lexi knows where her biggest support is, whether I'm standing on the sidelines or not. She she knows right. She knows where her biggest fans were her biggest supporters. We've got her back, whether we're standing on the sideline, or standing sitting in the stands or whatever. That doesn't define that doesn't define whether I support her that day that that was learned in our home long ago. No matter what you do.

Sam Fischer  50:55
Love it sound love it. Well, I had 38 Poor Sam, we'll talk about Sam, you know, the you know, that's the secret of this podcast is really it's my therapy. But did you know that I had, I don't know. 38 or 40 football games in high school. And the only games my parents went to,

51:12
how many do

Sam Fischer  51:14
to? And look at me, I'm alright, huh? Look at me, baby. Hey, I made it. Yeah. So anyway, yeah, I just it's a different time, though. You know, it's just a different time. And, and maybe I should, my parents are both deceased. They can't talk for themselves right now or defend themselves, but they did live 330 miles away. So you know, there's that part of it. So.

51:35
Right, but I think if you have really established a good relationship,

Sam Fischer  51:39
I knew where I sat with my parents. Correct. I mean, I got it. I mean, somebody had to run the ranch. I mean, I wasn't, you know, somebody had that stuff to do. So it's I was fine. That's fine. Yeah. You knew you were loved it of course. Of course. Right? Yep. Gosh, guys, I really appreciate your time. Is there anything that I missed or that you'd like to cover? Just really appreciate our time together.

52:05
No, I just think the thing for Jess and I and Lexi, it's just it's so awesome. How, though her presence isn't here in Omaha all the time the support we have from people here like yourself. It really it means so much to our family. It really we feel so blessed. I

Sam Fischer  52:23
know justice in all the social media thing and God bless him. I wish I wasn't either. I'm not at all except for tick tock for God's sake. She's on tick tock, interrupt. Tick tock. Anyway. She's on tick tock. Dang it. But keep posted stuff because I read that stuff. And it's, it's it's a you know, social media is how I've kept up with you for the last I don't know, 10 or 13 years. I haven't. I mean, I just I don't know, three, four years ago. An event? Yeah. And I saw you because I got somewhere. Yeah. 13 years ago. Sorry. I

52:58
forgot about that. Yeah. So anyway. Yeah. No, we do appreciate it. It's fun to catch up with people and just have people cheering for us.

Sam Fischer  53:07
Well, you know, I've got listeners in all 50 states and 36 countries, so maybe we have few more fans.

53:14
Awesome. All right, then they should follow her on Instagram. They

Sam Fischer  53:17
should get the blue IZEI s s.

53:24
And she's verified so you gotta try messenger

Sam Fischer  53:27
yet. She didn't message me back. Yeah. I know.

53:35
She will. Now after we tell her

Sam Fischer  53:36
five o'clock in the afternoon. I'm like, I gotta I gotta I gotta come with some screens idea. I'm like, this is a strange idea. That's funny. She wouldn't she wouldn't get. Well, maybe she would.

53:47
Now that we can now that we reconnected, we need to get together for dinner. Yes, we will.

Sam Fischer  53:51
Therefore, yes, I got all kinds of I got all kinds of time every day. I just do you just let us know. So All right. Cool. Thanks, guys. Thank

53:59
you. Thank you for having

54:02
me. Thanks, man.