Celebrate Yourself Without Needing A Reason

We come back to a simple truth: life is beautiful when we stop measuring our worth by outside applause and start seeing ourselves clearly. We share a Tulum ceremony story that exposes why high performers chase home runs and how to build self-worth by celebrating the small wins. 
• life is beautiful when you zoom out and notice what lined up 
• the cost of living in survival mode and always needing the next big win 
• how childhood moments shape a pattern of outsourcing validation 
• why accomplishments can land and still feel empty 
• the purge as a metaphor for finally letting go 
• Mother Aya’s message about worry, control, and dimming your light 
• the coconut tree image as a lesson in identity change and discipline 
• celebrating singles and strikeouts as proof you showed up 
• creating a bell ritual to honor daily progress 
• the drone flute as a symbol of self-seeing and healing 
• dopamine chasing versus steady self-worth 
Ring That MF'n Bell.

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Transcript

imitless Self And Welcome

SPEAKER_03 0:05

Once you see what you actually are, that you're an infinite, limitless being, you'll see that nothing exists outside of you. I'm your host, Derek Grant, and this is the Pathway to Your Results Podcast. Bro. Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the Pathway to Your Results Podcast. It is your boy DG. We are here. It's, I always tell you this, I feel like I always say this, but you don't know that because you listen to this every week. But it's been a while since we've spoken. I haven't recorded any podcasts here in a while, but here we are. Um I got a lot, I got a lot to share. I got a lot to share, um, a lot of things that'll help you. Um, but first, before we get started, I just want to say life is beautiful. Life is beautiful. If you just take a step back and look at all the things that are in place, all the things that had to happen, all the things that did not happen for you to be where you are at right now. Now, I get it. You may not be where you want to be, but the reality of it is that you are where you are. So when you can find the beauty in that, you will see that beauty was all around you. So today's episode, though, I wanted to talk to you, talk to you about uh really how important it is for you to start to learn how to celebrate yourself. And when you celebrate yourself and you honor yourself, then you'll start to see that beauty was all around you. So I wanted to talk to you and break this down. Um I went, I had, I had uh since my last recording, I went to Tulum to go see my good buddy Jesus, right? Uh those of you who've been on any retreats, you know Jesus is the salt of this earth. Uh and every time I go see Jesus and I have uh ayahuasca ceremonies, I always get to know him just a little bit better, a little bit more. Now we're to the point where I think, I mean, maybe this is me saying this, I don't know. Me and Jesus are buddies now. We're not just like he sends me uh videos off of Facebook. Uh I don't even have Facebook, but he sends me videos of uh Jaguars, and I'm sending him videos of jaguars rolling around and eating ayahuasca leaves and all this stuff. So anyway, our relationship has gone to a new level. But I went down there and I had these two ceremonies. Now I didn't plan on doing these two ceremonies. This was never the plan. I got done in December out of this program I told you I was a part of. And then before I know it now, I'm going down there with a client, and then I had some stuff pop up in my life, and I'm like, I feel like I need to work through this. And here's what I wanted to tell you. You know, I told you I had a goal, I had a dream. You know, I was like, all right, let's accomplish this, let's do this, let's build this. And then I got there and I still felt empty. How many of us ever struggled with that? You had the dream, you had the goal, and you accomplished it, and it still didn't feel like it was enough. When I set out on this journey, I said, you know what, I just want to figure out a way to help myself so I can help the world. And I was using certain metrics to measure that. And then when I got to a million followers on Instagram, it was like, yeah, I did it. But how come I still don't feel like I did it? So anyway, I always say the medicine calls you. And I started to feel like this calling, right? Like, okay, maybe I gotta do these two ceremonies. I was super intentional. Here's what my intention was. I said, I want to get rid of this program of feeling like I gotta live in survival mode. I'm tired of it. My mom used to tell me, I'm sick and tired of being sick and tired. I'm tired of living in survival mode. So I go down there and I just go jump straight to the good stuff, right? We might as well sit here and waste time, right? Start politicking, and now we talk about something else because you know I will go on a rant, but I'm not gonna do that. So we get down there and we're doing, I'm doing two ceremonies, right? So now I know Jesus, I've done this is gonna be 19 and 20th ceremonies. I know how it works, and I understand, but every time I would say, like, I never understand how the medicine works, but I've I'm starting to kind of figure it out a little bit more, right? So anyway, he gives me um four cups, right? Back to back to back. That's that four? Back to back to back to back to back. It's a lot, my point is. Anybody that does the ceremony, that's a lot to sit there and just guzzle four cups back to when you say take the second one, you're like, I can't, I don't even want this on my uh, I can't even. So anyway, he did four, and I'm like, okay, this is gonna be, this is gonna be a doozy. That's what I'm telling myself, right? And he comes back, and I sit down on my mat and he comes back probably about, I don't know, 40 minutes later, and he's like, How are you feeling? I'm like, I'm feeling good. He goes, Okay, drink more. I'm like, okay, he's gonna give me one or two cups. He gave me four more. Now we're at eight. Now, this is not, I'm not saying this from a place of like, oh, I'm trying to break a record, but that was a personal record. I ain't never done no eight cups. I never had drank eight cups. This was this was a PR, okay. And I'm just thinking to myself, like, Lord, if this, if this kicks in, it's gonna be, we're going on a journey. But it never really kicked in. And Ace came over a couple hours later and he goes, How do you feel?

SPEAKER_02 5:34

And I'm like, to be honest with you, I don't feel really anything.

hildhood And Being Celebrated

SPEAKER_03 5:38

I don't, I mean, I got a stomach full of ayahuasca, but I don't feel like anything. And he says, I know you told me when you told me your intentions, you talked about how you're tired of living in survival mode and you're tired of feeling like you gotta hit a home run. Now he's not really, he knows of baseball, but he speaks like, what are these home runs? I'm like, I don't know. I keep telling myself, like, if we have this deal or this happens, or this comes through, or this person discovers me, then that'd be the big thing. He goes, Ah, yes, this is the home run. And he goes, What were your birthday parties like growing up? And then all of a sudden I just started crying. And I'm just sitting here having a conversation with him. I'm like, I didn't, I didn't really have birthday parties like that.

unknown 6:27

Right?

etting Go Through The Purge

ay Two Goes Straight In

other Aya Confronts Survival Mode

he Flute And Saying Goodbye

SPEAKER_03 6:27

I didn't really have like these big celebrations. No, there was nothing really like that. And I started telling him a story, and I've talked about this on a podcast, and I said, you know, he asked me basically the question he asked me goes, he goes, So were you celebrated? I go, I was celebrated, but not like really, like when I did what I was supposed to do, that was what I was supposed to do. So it was no big deal. Oh, you accomplished it. Good, you did it. Oh, you did something. It was always basically to make it look like it was normal. So I learned, I never learned really how to celebrate myself. And I told him a story. I said, you know, I was seven years old. I tried to celebrate myself. I did it, I scored three goals in a soccer game. I was excited. Mr. Egan was at the end of his driveway. He said, Man, Derek, how'd your game go? I said, I said, I was the best player on the team. My dad said, Don't you ever say you're the best because nobody's gonna want to ever play with you. So this created a program. Jesus was like, dang, well, yeah. Here you are. You learn how to celebrate yourself. Or you're celebrating yourself, and you get told basically that that's bad. Now you become a high performer, you come a high achiever, you become an athlete. Now, this only exacerbates the program of don't honor yourself, don't celebrate yourself because this is what you were supposed to do anyway. So now here you are. You accomplish all of these things. You play for the Globetriers as just a job. You do all of these things, and it's not really a big enough deal for you to celebrate yourself. Meaning you don't really see yourself, Derek. You don't know how to honor yourself, you don't celebrate yourself. So that first ceremony, I drank a lot, but there was nothing that really like, I didn't visions, nothing. There was nothing uh supernatural, you wouldn't say. Nothing, nothing, nothing mystical. So it's time to leave. It's time to go back. And I'm just saying to myself, like, I got a bunch of stuff in my stomach, and I still have not purged. I have not left this job, I have not thrown up yet. So I know we're going back. Anybody been on a ceremony with me and you go down that gravel road that's super bumpy? When you get to get on that road and you hit every bump, your stomach will eventually, it's going to start to say, we got to get this up out. So anyway, we start going down this bumpy road and it's nighttime, and like my eyes are closed. I'm just like, oh, it's coming. So I tap Jesus. I say, Jesus. And I'm thinking in my mind, how you say stop in Spanish? I say, you know what? We're not even gonna figure out how to stay stop. I'm just and then I was like, I think it's alto, but I'm like, alto means tall. Anyway, I never got to it. I just tapped him on his shoulder, said, hey, stop, stop. So I get out to get out of the car, and Jesus comes around right at the back of the car. And then all of a sudden the nausea goes away. I'm like, man, what the f and I say, I say to him, I'm like, hey, Seuss, it was right there. It was about to come out. And then all of a sudden, I stood up and I relaxed. And I like poked, like, I let my stomach just drop. And I got nauseous. And the reason why I'm saying this, because this was me finally letting go. I just let myself relax and it came out. And there's let me let me tell you, there's nothing better when it comes out. There's a relief. We're done. I feel back to normal. So, anyway, I go back to the room. Now, there's no TV in the room, and you've been in the jungle for six, seven hours. You've probably taken a nap, you've rested. So it's going to be difficult to fall back asleep. So I can't fall back asleep, right? And I'm just laying there. I'm like, man, what was that about? But I've done this enough to know what it was about. The medicine was preparing me for the next day. It was preparing me to clean out all this stuff in my nervous system. Now, you guys go ahead, ushers, you can go ahead and close the door now. So we can go ahead and I had to I had to get through that till I get to the good part, right? The next day I wake up finally and I'm tired, right? Didn't really sleep up, sleep very well. But it's time to go back to the jungle. And hey, Suza asked me, How do I feel? I said, I feel good. I didn't really, nothing happened, no visions, no. He says, How was your stomach? Did you have any diarrhea? I said, no. And he kind of looked at me like, almost like, dang, I gave you the brew that was supposed to, but it didn't clean you out. It didn't do its job. So anyway, we get back to the jungle. And when we get to the jungle, here's the words that he says. Like normally we talk, what's going on? What's your intention? He says, We will talk after. I want you to drink first. I said, I ain't never heard you say that before, hey, Suzy. You ain't basically what you're telling me, we're gonna get straight to it and we're gonna do it like we do it when we do it for TV. And I ain't got time to talk to you about nothing anymore. We're gonna get right to it. So he gives me three cups off the bat, okay? And I'm like, well, we're going less. We're doing less than we did the first day. So this must be the potent. This must be that uh that Frank Lucas, that blue magic. This must be that real stuff. This must be the real stuff. The, the, the, the, what do they call it when they talk talk about like cocaine? This is stuff that's raw. It's this is the raw stuff. This ain't the stuff, you ain't put no baking soda in this one. Anyway, I don't know firsthand. I'm just watching, I watch movies growing up. So anyway, about 45 minutes in, all of a sudden, I can't even lift my arm. My body is heavy. And Jesus comes over to me, and I'm saying to myself, please don't give me no more. Please don't give me no more. And he says to me, How do you feel? I said, I can't lift my body. I can't lift my arm. He goes, Okay. And he walks off. And all of a sudden, I start going and seeing all these visions, and now the medicine is here. Mother Aya, as we call it, she is here. She is, and she is very, very angry with me. She is not happy at all. And here's what she says to me. She goes, You promised me that you wouldn't do this again. And I was like, I'm sorry. She goes, No, I don't have time for apologies. You told me that you wouldn't forget what you were. You told me that you wouldn't forget what you were capable of, that you wouldn't continue to dim your light. And here you are doing everything. And she's like, Why are you so worried about everything to the point that you live in survival mode? Why are you still doing this? And I'm like, I don't know. And she says to me, and she yells this, don't you know that I control everything and everything is going the way it's supposed to? Everything is happening according to plan. And I was like, I know that. She's like, well, then why do you keep worrying about everything? Why do you worry about if this is going to happen, or what if this is going to this, or what if? And then she brings me back. She brings me back to my childhood. And now I'm not going to apologize if I get emotional because I was able to experience and feel and see all these past versions of me growing up. And this little boy who just longed to be seen. He just wanted to be celebrated. Now I'm saying this right now because some of us right now listen to this, we know that we weren't seen. And we know we weren't celebrated. And it's not that you weren't celebrated. You may not have been celebrated to the capacity of what you were capable of receiving. So we want to make sure I'm not throwing no parents under the bus, but maybe your soul really needed to be celebrated. It needed to be put up on everybody's shoulders because that's what your soul needed. And maybe you didn't receive it and you didn't get taught, but it was on you to learn how to do it for yourself. So, I mean, I'm, I can't even sit up. And I mind you, I'm in the jungle. I don't need a tan for any of you who know what I look like. I don't need to get a tan. Now, I'm not the darkest of the dark, but I don't need a tan. But I was out here baking in the sun, burning, and I can't even move. I'm like sitting here. And here's the weird thing: you don't feel pain. There's no pain. But I, it's like there's no pain, but you know you're hot. And hey, Seuss comes over, and I don't know how long it's been, and he goes, Are you okay? And all I say to him, hey Seuss, I'm gonna be burnt as a chip if you don't get me up out of this sun. You need, I can't move. I'm gonna be black. You need to help me. So he picks me up and he moves, he picks up the mat and he moves, and I muster up enough strength to move. And before the ceremony had started, there was a uh uh a coconut that was on the ground. And this coconut had a plant coming out of it. It was a coconut tree. And the coconut tree was coming out of the shell. And then when he moved the mat, the feet, my feet on the mat were right where this coconut tree was growing. And I laid down and I'm still like, oh my gosh, I'm out of it. And he starts playing the flute. And he starts playing this Native American drone flute, and he starts playing it. And I go into this state where I can't even like, I just start crying hysterically, like weeping, bawling, like And I was this little boy. This little boy who longed to be seen. And Mother Aya starts breaking everything down for me. She starts telling me why, as a man, you feel like I you need to hit a home run. You feel like, oh, I need to do something big. She says, This is what you developed so you could be seen. Let's be the best. Let's do this, let's score a lot of points, let's be the fastest, let's be the tallest, let's get let's be seen. Why? Because you really just wanted to be seen by daddy. See at that time when you were seven years old and you said, I'm the best, and you were affirming yourself, and dad said the opposite. At that moment, she said, You went on a journey to get dad's approval. Because in that moment, when you were affirming and celebrating yourself, and you didn't feel like dad affirmed and celebrated you, that was the moment that you learned, oh, I guess I'm not supposed to celebrate myself. And you began to outsource it. So as I'm crying and I'm weeping, and he's playing almost like this song, this ode to this, this it was a funeral. And I was crying and I was weeping. I kept saying, I love you. I love you. It was me saying goodbye to this little boy. Now, as I was saying goodbye to this little boy, there was a relief. This power came over me of I'm not him anymore. I can start to celebrate myself. So as I get done with that purge of crying, I feel normal again. And Jesus isn't playing the music. So I sit up and Jesus is right there. I go, you don't mean the Sagittarius slash ophicus. I need to know how, I need to know why. So I look at Jesus and I feel like we have this relationship now, so I can say this and ask him these questions. Before I would just wonder, I say, Jesus, when you start playing the music, are you playing it because you can feel the medicine in me moving? Or when or does the medicine start moving when you play the music? He said, both. Sometimes I can feel the medicine, but sometimes I will call in the spirits of the plants to start moving through you. And I said, Dang, you a bad boy. Oh my goodness. I said, so you start playing that flute. And that's what started like he goes, yes. He said, I could feel where you were. So I started to play it in this. I said, Boy, you you cold-blooded boy, you a bad motherfucker. So anyway, he says that and he looks at me. Now I'd already gone through the retinal circus. I mean, I'm talking about I'm having visions, I'm like seeing stuff, and I'm like, okay, ceremony's done. He goes, Would you like to drink more?

SPEAKER_01 18:10

And I said, What are you doing, boy? You out here, what you trying to try to get your boy? What you trying to do here? Hey, Seuss, what are you doing?

oconut Tree Lesson On Discipline

SPEAKER_03 18:17

And I said, Yes. Now, I the reason why I said yes was because I trust this man. I trust this. He has led me along up until this point, he has not led me astray. So I said, Yeah, if you ask him, then there must be something. So I say yes. So he gives me two more cups. I'm not even lying, y'all. Probably within five to ten minutes, I was right back. Right back into, I mean, Mother Eye was here. I laid back down. He's playing the hand pan, he's playing the guitar, he's doing all this stuff. They call it the icados, right? We've talked about it. He's playing it, and I'm right back in it. And then he stops the music. And he walks off. And I'm like, yo, you just called this in, and now you left me. I have to work through this by myself. You mother, I can't believe you left me here with this. And I'm like full in it. And Mother Eye comes to me and she says, sit up. And I say to her, I can't. The way my body, she goes, sit up right now. So I sit up in this meditative lotus position. I'm just sitting here, and I can barely open my eyes. And when I open my eyes, all I do is I see this plant. And this plant, this coconut tree that was sprouting from this dead coconut shell. She goes, look at this. This is you. There was a part of this tree that was sprouting that was alive, but then there was also a part of it that was dead. And she said, This is you. Do you see that the dead part has broken off of the living part, but there's still a part of the living part growing? This is how you have to look at this part of you who is dying, who needed to be validated and accepted on the outside. It is dying. And she said, The discipline that will be required will be the same discipline that is being used right now for you to sit up. It's easier for you to lay down. It's easier for you not to celebrate yourself. It's easier for you to keep outsourcing your validation. It's easier for you to keep seeking approval from the world. It's easier for you to do all of these things than it is for you to sit up right now. Do you see how this works? And I'm like, yes, yes, yes. She says to me, she goes. Do not go back into your world without celebrating yourself. Now, I have to go ahead and say this to you all right now. Some of us are entrepreneurs, we're athletes, we're mothers, we're husbands, we're wives, we're children, we are all of these things. And we never once took time to celebrate where we are at on this journey. We never took time to say, damn, look at you, girl. Look at what you've done.

SPEAKER_02 21:00

Look at it. I know it, I know life is stressful right now. You wonder how you're gonna make ends meet, and will I will you I be able to feed these kids? And will I be, but look at you. Look at you.

he Bell Ritual For Small Wins

he Drone Flute As A Symbol

SPEAKER_03 21:09

You brought these two children into this world. Look at you. You've you've re- uh you've redesigned and transformed your body. That's to be celebrated. You've worked on yourself, that's to be celebrated, that's to honor yourself. So I just, Mother I was like, you keep looking for a home run because you think the home run is what's going to give you permission to be seen. But do you not know you can hit a bunch of singles, you can strike out the fact that you were even at the plate in this thing that we call life, the fact that you have showed up today is enough for you to celebrate yourself. And she said, You better when you get home. She said, You better not come back here and you ain't celebrating yourself. So all of a sudden, this idea came to me. I said, I'm gonna go on Amazon and I'm gonna order me a bell. I don't know what you call it. But I'm gonna order me a bell. And then I went on there, I said bells. That's all I typed in was bells on Amazon. And then Amazon, you went ahead and you went and did the rest. And these things that we call dinner bells. I guess that's what they use on farms, right? Let everybody know. Come and get in, right? You ring the bell to let everybody know the food is on the table. And I'm not gonna ring this bell twice, you're gonna get your butt in this house and sit down before this food gets cold. And I ordered me two bells. I put a bell in the weight room and I put a bell in my office. And now that bell, when you hear that bell, you know what time it is. That is me honoring myself. So the reason why I'm saying this, because you need to find something in your life to signify and be a symbolical meaning for you to start ringing your bell, to start honoring yourself. And it does not have to be a big thing. And here's what I started to notice. Good God almighty, y'all stay with me. I don't need no home runs anymore. There's a lot of people in the Hall of Fame that got to the Hall of Fame off of hitting singles. I don't need, I don't need a big thing for me to start celebrating myself. You know what? I'm gonna honor the little stuff. I'm gonna celebrate the little stuff. So here's what I did. Now, good God almighty, this is coming to me. I told the DG Mindset Academy about this. Could not believe this in real time when I figured this out. When I had my ceremonies in October with Jesus, he was bringing out all the, he brought the guitar, he brought the flute. That flute did something from a spirit. I didn't I and I wanted to ask him, what is this? What kind of flute is? I've never seen a flute with two holes only. I've seen a little one, the fills were on the roof, but I've never seen the big joint. I go, what is this? He so I so I went on uh Google, I went on chat, right? That's one thing about me as a Sagittarius. I am a seeker of knowledge. I will figure out a way and find a way to get my answer. And I'm like, what is the flute with the two holes? And it said it's a drone flute. Okay, so I went on Amazon. I wanted the real drone flute. I'm talking about the one that was made out of wood. I wanted the real, not the plastic one, no disrespect to the plastic one, because I got the plastic one, but that don't hit like the one made out of cherry wood, the one made out of walnut. So Jesus was telling me that this drone flute that he got was a gift from a client. And I said, Oh, right. He goes, Yes, this one was made out of walnut. And I'm like, okay, I'm taking notes. I'm like, okay, walnut, I want a walnut one, right? So I come back and I tell Carla, and she says, What do you want for your birthday? I said, I want a drone flute made out of walnut. And so she goes and looks it up. She goes, Okay, I found it. She said it's gonna take 60 days. And she ordered it back in October. I mean, uh, back in November. I'm like, I don't care. It doesn't matter, right? So my time in between, I'm gonna let you know how I work. I know it's on the way. I start preparing myself. I'm on YouTube, I'm watching it. I ordered the plastic one off of uh uh Amazon. I said, this is gonna be what I use to practice with when I get the real one, right? So I go on YouTube, I'm learning how to do it, I'm playing it, but I'm not really playing it like that, right? I get back from my ceremonies in February, and the day that I got back, that drone flute was delivered. Now, mind you, this was the same flute that Jesus played. That was the funeral, the ending, the death of this verse of me, this little boy who learned how to validate himself on the outside. And I said, Oh my goodness. So that's what Mother Aya said when she said, I control everything. Everything is in order. So I got that flute. Now, anybody's ever had this. The first time you played, it ain't gonna sound like how's made it sound. It ain't as easy as you know what I'm talking about. It was, it took me some time to get it down, but it started to do something for me. Every time I picked it up and play it, it started to like almost like repatch and repair this little boy. Now, my kids now. I have a little, I tell them I play an ode. So I wake them up, I play, I play it in the morning, I wake them up. When I come out of my room, I put it right next to my nightstand. When I get to the top of the stairs, I play it. They're usually downstairs, but I play it so they know this heel little boy is coming downstairs. And what they don't realize, and one day they will, maybe they'll listen to this podcast, but this flute has become the metaphor, the symbol of this little boy who sees himself now. This little boy who doesn't need the outside world to uh validate himself. This flute has become an extension of the uh uh uh what do you want to call this? The bell. And I have the flute right here in my hands, and if you thought I wasn't gonna play it, you must be crazy because I'm gonna play it. And I know what you're thinking, oh Lord, I hope this, maybe I'm projecting onto you right now. Maybe, maybe you're not even thinking it. Maybe you're saying, I really want to hear it. Well, this is the song that I play to honor this little boy. That ain't it. I'm not on beat right now. Hold on, let me get the tone right. Hold on now. So I play this a thousand times a day. I get done with a call, I play that. I just do something that excites me. I play that. And the reason why I'm doing this, it's not about the flute.

SPEAKER_02 27:30

The flute represented this little boy who has finally given himself permission to celebrate himself. And I have to say this to some little girl inside of you right now.

elf Worth And The Process

SPEAKER_03 27:43

Some little boy, you have done some things that you are so proud of. You have done things that you like, oh my goodness, I'm so proud of myself. But the world said, don't you be cocky, don't you be arrogant, don't you uh get a big head, and here's how we distinguish, we learn. Oh, I'm not supposed to celebrate me. I'm telling you right now, celebrate yourself. Honor yourself with joy. Because here's what ends up happening. When you celebrate yourself, this is you ultimately seeing yourself. And when you see yourself, you will validate yourself. And when you validate yourself, that is what we call self-worth. And when you have an increase of how much you see and how worthy you are, you will start to see that my capacity increases. I can receive more, I can do more. I'm not afraid to put myself out there. I'm not afraid to try and play this flute and mess up the first time. I'm gonna try it again. You know why? Because I'm going to honor myself anyway. I may fall short to the world standards, but that standard wasn't what I abide by anyway. Now you understand why Jesus said you can be in the world, but be not of the world. I ain't of the world no more. I see me now. And this is why, this is why the work that you do on yourself is so important. I didn't plan on going back and doing those last two ceremonies, but I can see why now I had to go back and do those last two ceremonies. And here's what changed when I came back. I kept looking for the home run, the home run, the home run. And I realized I just wanted the home run so the world would see it. And it was just another deeper level that I wasn't seeing myself. But now I'm okay with striking out. I'm okay with hitting singles. You know why? Because I'ma honor the fact that I swung at it. I'ma celebrate the fact that maybe I took a stab at it. Yeah, I didn't hit it. And I know that's what you're gonna see, but you know what I'm seeing? I'm seeing the fact that I swung at it because there was a version of me at one point in existence that was afraid to even step to the plate.

SPEAKER_00 29:51

So the reason why I'm saying this to you all. Go out there and be everything that you know you can be.

SPEAKER_02 30:02

Go be it. Motherfucker, what are you waiting for? I'm sorry, I'm not cussing at you, I'm just speaking to you.

SPEAKER_03 30:08

What are you waiting for? If you know, you know deep down inside you can be something more than what you are than what you waiting for? Now, no, now I have to say this. It's going to be uncomfortable. It's going to, there's going to be a I don't want you to think. I've told you this many a times. You it ain't gonna be all hunky dory. There is going to be a transformation that takes place, and it's gonna, as you would say, it's gonna suck. But even in the suck, you can still honor yourself for showing up. You can still celebrate yourself. It ain't gonna be perfect the first time, but here's the irony of it. It's gonna be perfect the first time because whatever it is is exactly the way it's supposed to be. So here's what I fell in. You when we talk about falling in love with the process, it's so much easier to fall in love with the process when you're honoring yourself as you're going, when you're celebrating yourself as you go. Stop waiting until you get to the destination to celebrate yourself. I just had a client, she was a rookie in the WNBA. I said, Did you celebrate yourself? Celebrate your rookie year. She's like, No, I didn't. I said, Well, what you doing? You're about to start your second year. You still haven't celebrated yourself. You still haven't honored yourself. You still oh, well, when I get to the end, no, don't wait. Don't wait. My mama used to tell me, wait broke the wagon down. Stop waiting for the big reason for you to honor yourself and be proud of yourself. Look yourself in the mirror today, before you go to bed and say, I'm so proud of you. I'm so proud of you for you showing up. You built that website today. You made those offers today. You posted that video today. You told somebody that you loved them when months ago you didn't even want to talk to them. Look at what you've done. Be proud of yourself. And here's what you do. Ring the bell. Ring that motherfucking bell. Ring it. And here's the deal: you have infinite times throughout the day that you can ring the bell. And here's what you're gonna start to see, and here's what you're gonna start to notice. I'm not afraid to do anything anymore because I'm gonna value me and I'm gonna honor me anyway. I don't need the applause. I don't need nobody else to ring my bell. And matter of fact, I may ring my bell for you to give you permission to start ringing your bell. So now all we're gonna start hearing is bells ringing. And here's the, and you know the song that's gonna play. You can ring. I ain't gonna sing. I'm I won't do it. But then Carly comes to me the next day. She didn't know this. She didn't know none of this. She comes to me the next day and she goes, they say that there's a study when you hear this song. She showed me on Instagram. Now I don't know how how how true it is on Instagram, but she said there's a study that when you listen to this song, it instantly raises some type of hormone inside of you. I forgot what it was, whatever makes you happy, right?

SPEAKER_02 32:48

And she plays a song and it goes, it's if you can, if I can ring my bell.

opamine Chasing And Real Joy

SPEAKER_03 32:54

And I'm like, oh my goodness, this is what I needed. Ring your bell. That's my point. Ring your bell. If there's anything I can give you from my ceremonies to help you along your journey, be proud of yourself. Honor yourself. And here's the deal, you ready? And this is the last thing I will leave you with. What I realized. When you're not honoring yourself, you know what you look for? This is what Mother Aya told me. She said, You look for this thing called dopamine. Dopamine. And she says, dopamine is the hope hormone, the hope chemical. See, we scroll and we look for the big thing. Why? Because of uh the dopamine that it creates, hoping this is gonna be the thing. Hopefully I got the DM. Hopefully this is the thing. Hopefully, this is my big break. This is my breakthrough. And you sit here and you wait for it, and that's the dopamine that so she goes, she's telling me, she's like, I'm gonna give you more dopamine in this ceremony than you need in a whole lifetime. And sure enough, she has. I'm not looking for the big home run anymore. Oh, we're gonna celebrate this single, we're gonna celebrate this strikeout. We don't need no home run. And then when the home run comes, guess what? You better believe we're gonna. If you hear a car going down the road and it's honking, please know that it's me. It is me. I'm just gonna start I'm gonna celebrate the biggest of the big when it's time. But we're also gonna honor the small things. So for you on your journey. The fact that you're here right now, the fact that your daddy's sperm made it to your mother's egg, and you grew into who you are today, that in and of itself should be celebrated.

SPEAKER_02 34:32

Think about it. That's a motherfucker. That's a miracle. That's a miracle. You understand? That's a miracle. Do you know how many of them sperms were swimming and only one made it?

SPEAKER_03 34:42

What? You are an anomaly, a miracle in this universe. Celebrate that.

xistence Is The Celebration

SPEAKER_00 34:48

So, what is my point? What am I saying? You don't need a reason. Your existence was enough.

SPEAKER_03 34:59

Your is-ness was enough.

SPEAKER_02 35:03

Girl, you here right now. What are you talking about? You here, son! You you're here! What are you talking about?

SPEAKER_03 35:12

You don't need nothing else. You are here. Celebrate that. Because there's a lot of people who ain't here no more. There's a lot of people in the graveyards who didn't learn how to celebrate themselves. And I'm gonna tell you this. Eventually this game's gonna be over, then you ain't gonna be able to celebrate this human life. And you're gonna get back over to the other side and you'll be like, dang, that's all this was? This shit was a game? What the f oh my gosh, why didn't I enjoy it more? How come I didn't celebrate my y'all made me look? When I what? When I crossed over, y'all didn't I didn't know I was gonna forget. Y'all didn't tell me that if I had known, oh my goodness, this you mean to tell me that this whole thing was just a game? I would have enjoyed it more. I would have done it my way. Go and do it. Honor yourself, celebrate yourself, be proud of yourself.

SPEAKER_00 36:08

Not because of what you've done, but because of who you are.

SPEAKER_03 36:16

And please know I wish you nothing but the best on the pathway to your results.