How do you divine?

STICK AH PIN | Summer lessons & Fall Discipline. Voices of the Caribbean and Fall TV

• How do you divine? • Season 3 • Episode 23

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We take a moment to pause, reflect, and hold a vibe as we transition from summer to fall. Join us as we discuss the personal transformations and memorable experiences from the summer, including family moments, new routines, and creative ventures. We'll also explore the lessons learned, the challenges faced, and the importance of giving ourselves grace. Dive into the 'Feel ah Away' series and discover how it amplifies Caribbean voices and navigates cultural conversations. 

I touch on the significance of community and how to show up for it. Plus, get excited for fall TV and some reading recommendations to enrich your daily routine. Thank you for supporting 'How Do You Divine' and join us for weekly episodes as we continue this journey together.

  • Youtube Creators mentioned: Peyton Charles, Allyiahsface, Tenickab
  • Book Recommendations: The Anxious Generation by Jonathan Hall 
    • Up From Nothing (John Hope Bryant),
    • Kennedy Ryan's - Before I let go 



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Thank you for listening and for adding new dimensions to your definitions. Keep growing, keep exploring, and keep defining life on your terms.


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Meet Our Founder & Host 🎙️
Sanika is a storyteller, vibe architect, and crowd igniter—passionate about self-discovery, culture, and the power of words. With a background in technology and marketing communications, she’s built a platform rooted in authenticity and resonance. Whether commanding the stage or leading deep conversations, Sanika doesn’t just hold space—she transforms it. Her work inspires growth, challenges perspectives, and amplifies the voices that need to be heard most

As the host of How Do You Divine?, she invites listeners to redefine meaning, embrace transformation, and navigate life—one word at a time. Her mi...

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Welcome back to this episode of How Do You Divine Wagu. Today we are gonna pause, reflect on ULA vibe and stick up in, let's get into it. Can you believe the summer is coming to an end? Although we've come. To the end. It'll be back next year, it's fine, but we'll get into what the summer has meant. The Feel Away series that launched as well as fall TV coming up, some daily reading and where we're going with this season of how do you divine. So let's get into it. Stick up in. Woo. The summer was a ride for me. For me, it was about slowing down in some areas of my life and speeding up in others. Really family moments, new creative work. And some deep reminders in why I do what I do. My girls are heading back to school and this summer was monumental. I had the opportunity to spend time with them, make great memories, and start to create new routines because babes, when it comes to these girls getting older. Uh, every day I'm reminded of the quote that the days are long, but the years are short. I cannot believe that my oldest will now be a senior in high school and my youngest is entering middle school.'cause where we live, middle school starts in seventh grade. So, yeah, this summer has been really, really great. Uh, we explored some new interest. We made memories. There were so many conversations that happened this summer around what it means to be a professional black woman, as well as what it means to be a creative and an entrepreneur. I always feel like it is my responsibility as their mom. To have a sense of honesty about everything that I'm pursuing, and transparency because I want them to dream big and free, but also know that it's a grind, right? And it comes with a balance and a lot of sacrifice. So I was so grateful for this summer to be able to slow down a little bit more and spend time with them and help usher them into this new stage of our lives. Next year. This time we'll be talking about having a college student. Yikes. It's nuts. As someone who's been there since day one, it still feels very awkward. Whew. New phases, new things. Right. But the end of the summer is just not the end of a season. It's a checkpoint, a reminder that waits for no one. What lessons do we carry forward from the summer? I think especially in the. Here in the city, I know in the summertime we get the opportunity to connect with our friends from different walks of life. Between the festivals and the barbecues and the restaurant week and everything going on, it is really amazing. One of the lessons that I'm taking forward from the summertime is to continue to put yourself out there, to continue to not just be in the space and network, but send the emails and be open and transparent about my dreams and goals and aspirations for life. Inside and outside of my corporate, life. I think for a long time, and even now, right? The conversation is around niching down, who are you on specific platforms, um, as well as what are your career trajectories if you're in corporate, right? If you're an entrepreneur. The demand to find a lane and stick to that lane and just do that one thing this summer, something that I'm taking forward is that I can just be me. And unfortunately, I don't fit in a box. There isn't a lane that necessarily describes me and my ambitions, and that's fine because guess what? It opens the door for a conversation. So in addition to that, I wanna pose the same question to you. What did the summer teach you that you're gonna leave behind? And what did the summer teach you that you're gonna move forward? In terms of what the summer taught me in a good and bad way, is to be okay with not being able to complete all the things you would think at this stage of my motherhood journey, that I would be over mom guilt, that I would've come to a place where I managed it a lot better, where I have gained a real understanding of. The sacrifices and the balances. No girl. No. No. I don't ever think mom guilt will ever go away, but it's giving myself grace. So it's the one thing the summer taught me is that it's okay for them not to go everywhere that they wanna go and be a part of every single thing. Um, but also focusing on the things that really matter to us as a family and to each of my daughters individually. No one's gonna get it right all the time. So for me, one of the lessons that I'm also taking forward is to give myself grace. Grace on what I can deliver every single day for my family, what I can deliver for my friends, as well as what I can deliver as an entrepreneur and someone existing in the corporate spaces sitting at the intersection of technology, communication, and culture for a long time. Like I mentioned earlier, I felt like I needed to pick a lane niche down per platform which led to me focusing on wellness.'cause as I tend to say in all things, be well, giving myself the grace to respectfully say, no thank you. I don't fit in a box. I don't fit in a niche. So wrapping up, asking yourself, what have you learned this summer? What does the summer offer you? Both good and bad because we both know there's some bad things. Oh, topping on my bad thing before we wrap up is consistency. So during the year, I love a good system. I love a schedule. I love a structure. That is how my life has always been ran. I just feel better being prepared for the day and knowing what's gonna happen the week and all those things. I don't really get thrown off by spontaneity. Because listen, the girl love a good time, but in terms of the structure, I call it the bookends of my life. And the mornings I know what I'm doing. I know what time I'm waking up. I'm working out and doing all the things. But in the summertime, babe. In the summertime, the only workout I get in the summertime is all of the steps. When I dancing a festival, the only workout that I typically get in the summertime is the walk to and from the restaurant to the bar something that I am happy fall is coming back around, is for me to get back on my system and get back on my plan because babe, the other day I was walking around and I heard my knees crackling. They were crackling. So, you know, you gotta stay ready. You know, you don't gotta get ready if you stay ready, so you gotta stay ready. So I'm excited about getting back into. My systems and my structure, I'm excited into getting back into my schedule because in the summertime, when the kids are outta school, what system, what structure there is none. So I'm really excited about everyone kind of falling back into their schedules and their activities so that, you know, we can maintain some sanity around here because late nights, sunglasses in Advil, babe. Last night was too real. I wanna hear, how did your summer go? Did you travel? Did you do something new? Let me know in the comments. And I really, and truthfully, I wanna hear the bad. Traits and lessons that you learned this summer?'cause we all got a little vice, and I want to know, was it the cakes of the cookies? What was you getting into this summer that you are like, all right, September one to December 31st, we locking in and we leaving that behind. Let me know in the comments. Right into the Feel Away series that we premiered in August. This series is so near and dear to my heart. As you all know, I was born in Jamaica, and came to the States when I was very young, three, four, but always returned back to the island every summer. Then I actually started high school in Jamaica. As someone who not is only from the Caribbean, but also exists in the diaspora, I've always had the experience of the best of both worlds, right? Someone from the Caribbean who lives in the States in foreign, as we call it, who lives in New York and see the varying differences in culture. As well as someone who has lived on the island and attended school and have a lot of family that is still in the Caribbean. Launch and Feel Away was an extension of this podcast. Amplifying the voices in the Caribbean. Really the emotions of the Caribbean because I did not want for us to continue to have these conversations and not address the elephant in the room enough times. A lot of times in the Caribbean there are things that are said and things that we've normalized that leave us. Feeling some kind of way, right? And for those who are not from the Caribbean, feel a way, meaning that it leaves you feeling uneasy, uncomfortable, somewhat offended, but unsure. And while this does happen in many cultures across the world, I felt it was my responsibility to address it from my community, which is the Caribbean If you're new and you did not get a chance to go on both YouTube and our Instagram platforms and check out the Feel Away series, we launched in Brooklyn, New York, and we will continue sharing different scenarios that happen in the Caribbean, asking people in the streets how they would respond. The two options that I pose was, would you either cuss as we would say, which is aggressively addressing it head on, or would you nara, which is also known to be passive, and just let it sweep under the rug. So go and check out that series and you can see different individuals across the Caribbean. I think we almost covered everyone in the Caribbean, but go take a look. We presented the scenarios to people across the Caribbean from varying generations, which is something that is very important to me. I think as a millennial, we are, we've become so open honest and transparent about emotional wellness, mental health, and trauma, right? That we've experienced in our life, and now therapy and wellness groups have become. Normalized in our conversation. I think it's also our responsibility as the millennials to reach behind us and bring the generations that raised us along with us. because sometimes the conversation in my perspective, be very blame centric, removing yourself from responsibility or just being on the receiving end of treatment from the generations before you that did not have the tools or the knowledge to become better individuals themselves because the people who raised them didn't have the tools or the language. So as a millennial, I feel like it is our responsibility not only to look. Our past generations from the baby boomers and everyone before us and our grandparents to say they were either right or wrong, but also to help them along the way. And trust me, m miserable. But it is not an easy task that I'm asking you to be a part of, but what I'm asking is for us to be. Open to the discussion to give them the language, open ourselves up to be more empathetic to their experiences. So that was a bit long winded, but that is what we did in Brooklyn, New York. We went, around Flatbush, Brooklyn, you know, it's also known as the mecca of Caribbean culture. And ask individuals how they would respond to these scenarios. Some of the responses were truly hysterical because of your newer Caribbean people. They are. Characters, you hear me? W full of vibes. it was wonderful for us to launch this series. And one of the biggest takeaways that I had, was that older, that older generations became more accepting and numb. To what we would consider bad behavior, right? One of the men that I spoke to was in his seventies. Another woman I spoke to was in her late sixties. They basically said to me that this is normal behavior, so I'm accustomed to it. And part of that broke my heart. I don't want us to normalize the things that hurt us. Along our journey. I want us to be able to have the tools and the space confidence and courage to say, I didn't like the way you just said that, or that comment was not called for. Can we discuss that? What did you mean by that? Just giving us the ability to open up the conversation more in the Caribbean diaspora. In the Caribbean culture for said boy, and I really like the way you move. I don't like the way you talk, I don't like the aggression. I don't like that and for it not to be taken as a personal crucifixion, like you're trying to personally attacking that person's character and integrity. It's just that the action that they're taking, we would prefer that they don't do it in that manner. Right. Or we would prefer that they don't say these type of comments or. Create a space where those type of discussions become normalized'cause truly it's at someone else's expense. Right. Um, I'm not gonna share any of the scenarios here on the podcast'cause I wanna honor this series for what it is. It's a in the street, real life real conversation. The conversations were raw, there were laughter, there was realness, as a culture, we need to be louder about the things that we want to see exist in our, community. We have to be louder about the things that we wanna see in our culture. Oh, we are on this thing of,'cause we are in it. So if we don't want these comments or spaces or conversations to exist in many Caribbean households to come say something about it. And make spaces. In your home, in your friendships, in your family, where people can tell the truth, where culture gets louder and not more offensive. It's not true. Your word, like, you know, I always say people love play dumb. Forget wise. Let's start to have a conversation around what it looks like to be well in our culture, what it means to honor each other with conversation and the way we go about speaking to each other. So that was, feel a way. I am so proud of the first edition. And where do you think we should go next? I'd love to come out and visit places that have a wide range of different Caribbean cultures. From Jamaica to Trinidad, to St. Kits, to St. Vincent, to St. Croix, to Haiti. So you know, my passport. Always ready, put in the comments. Where do you think we should take Phil away to for our next edition? Let me know where feel away should land. Next. What is community? Community is a word thrown around a lot. So let's pause, reflect, what is it really? What does it even really mean? And the beauty is community is not just the person living next door. It's about who checks on you, who cares about you, who exists in your ecosystem that you feel seen and belong to? Who celebrates you? Who welcomes you in? It's the accountability and the belonging. And here's the part about community that I think we don't talk about enough. The lost ones. In a previous episode, we sat down with Les Young and we talked about redemption, and many of the stories he talked about in his time behind bars reminded me of the people in our community that I consider lost ones, right? The uncle, the brother, the sister, the friend that. Let's just say have made poor decisions or have fallen on hard times are no longer aligning with the expectation. Our family or friends have for them. What are we doing about the lost ones and is it really a community if we disregard and turn our back to those that we no longer? Feel aligned with the way we live life? It's a question I ask myself. Honestly, I'm a person of strong boundaries, so I really have one main rule. If you disrespect me, Bess begs Darla. There's no coming back. I have a strong belief around disrespect. I feel like if there is disrespect that exists in our relationship, then there is no community. There's nothing that we can move forward with here. There is no alignment if there is disrespect. But really and truthfully, there are moments that we will have disagreements. There will be moments where people don't see eye to eye. But if you're not disrespected or something hasn't occurred, that has truly changed the entire trajectory of your life or how you exist and your family, what is the path to recourse? How do we usher people back into our community? For me. I think it requires a lot of patience. Well, if I'm honest, outside of patience, it requires a lot of accountability. I am of the belief that if. I need to look at myself every day, I can tell you the things that I think I need to work on in areas where I can prove. But I think one of the things that we need to start to address in our community are the individuals that exist among us that. Lack accountability for their behavior that justify away things that either harm themselves or the people around them. Things that no longer serve them in their life. I think as we start to evolve as a people, we need to do it collectively, and the only way to do so is not by placing judgment on others, but also holding people. Right is right, wrong is wrong, and you can't operate in the wrong. And expect good things to follow. Right? I've even, as a child, I've always felt like God will never bless something that doesn't align with His path for your life. And ultimately that doesn't align with wellness, right? No one's telling you to be the most righteous person on the planet. No one's saying you must do this, but right is right and wrong is wrong. You cannot walk around mistreating. People and expect them to welcome you into their community with open arms and in this world today, I think we are suffering from a great deal of loneliness. With all that the internet has advanced us with what it has stolen, without a doubt, is the ability for human beings to connect on a real. Personal level. It's actually one of the reasons why I love to have in studio guests for the podcast because I think the energy is different when we're in the same building. Looking eye to eye, sharing stories and just holding a vibe rather than virtually. And while you consume this, podcast virtually, my goal always is to build a community filled with. Love and connection and you know that you resonate with my journey in some way or another, and with this sense of loneliness that is plaguing us right now. The real solution for it is community, both online and offline. So I'll ask you, how are you showing up for your community right now? Because the answer will strengthen our future. Okay. Okay. On a lighter note, fall tv. One thing I love about September, if you're a parent, if you're not a parent, listen here, listen here in, we all know September is the second real new year. And fall TV is on its way back, and I'm excited as someone who doesn't really love tv, I'll watch YouTube. I love my YouTube girls. Um. Who keep, I feel like keep hold, who holds me down through the fall TV hiatus. Um, Peyton, Charles, Aaliyah, Jay, some of the veterans on YouTube. But those two are my go-to Girls Tanika, girl Tanika with the fashion tips and she is. Hysterical. I'm trying to get the girls on the podcast. So if you see'em and you hear them out in the world put it in their comments to come on over to how do you divine so we can have a conversation. I love to see women out in the space growing and learning and just giving us the opportunity to follow their lives in a real way. Without oversharing, and one of the reasons I love these three women is that they come from three different backgrounds, three different areas of the world, but bed. They keep it a book, they keep it real. They allow us to be a part of their sisterhood in a real way. And most of all, ladies got the fashion. As my daughter was saying, clock it at the girls be looking good. The girls be looking good. Yeah, I'm here. I'm here for the pretty things. The girls be looking good. They be killing it. Love to see it. Love to see it every time. back to fall tv. I, I live on two extremes. Okay. Because I have to watch my girls on the vlog. I have to watch my YouTube girls, but then I need my scripted tv. And listen, there is something powerful about watching stories unfold week to week, the entertainment, the writing. It tugs on all of my heartstrings. So I'm gonna talk about two shows that I'm really looking forward to coming back. Number one is Paradise. Paradise on Hulu, to me, was an immediate hit. Sterling K Brown. Come on. Come on, Sterling. I would say come on in, get a hug, Sterling. But I feel like all black women give Sterling K. Brown a hug and we all are like just supporting Ryan in her head every night when she's taking care of the household. Ryan, I just want you to know personally from me. I'm with you girl. I'm with you holding down them boys we all with you. We love us. And Sterling K. Brown, paradise was a well-written season. One. Loved every bit about it. So season two, I'm locking in. I might start a live series to discuss scripted tv. You guys let me know what you think. I'm into it. If you are so. So in addition, Beyond tv, I am very intentional about my daily reading. My reading has two levels. I call it my learning and my lavishing. In the mornings, if I get overwhelmed, I usually try to read right after my devotional while I'm drinking my tea in the morning. That's my learning, so I am currently reading. The Anxious Generation. The Anxious Generation, I believe, by Jonathan Hall it's a great book about how social media is rewiring our brains and how this generation will struggle with mental wellness while consuming this level of social media. It's a really good book. So in the morning, that's when I read my learning book. I like to get through at least one, but mostly the goal is two books a month. I just started that book after finishing John Hope, Bryant's book up from nothing. Really, really enjoyed that book. I think I'm also gonna get the audible version to listen to it in my car. It was very inspiring, but it also just talked about the road to building legacy and a company, and something that he says often that I really admire is everyone should be a part of the free market. Yes. He talks extensively about how, the American opportunity is not dead and the American economic system is built on small to medium sized businesses. So I really enjoyed that book. And then we'll talk about my lavish book. I know I am behind because the girls were talking about this for a while. But listen, listen. Listen. I was busy. Okay, so I just, so I finished this book, curvy Girl a while ago. It was my lavish book, and when I say my lavish reads, these are fun books that help me wind down every night because I wanna be off. Devices at a reasonable hour every single day. I don't wanna go to bed with my phone in my hand. I don't wanna wake up and touch my phone. I just really want to be present and stay that way. So for some time now, I charge my phone away from my bed and it's just me and my book. So my lavish reading is always something a little fun, sometimes a little juicy, if you know what I'm saying. So I read Curvy Girl by Danielle. I'm going to put the books in. The podcast description, but I remember reading Girl and that book started off with a Bang. Okay? And I loved it. And I read that book in two days. That's how juicy that book was. So I picked up some books from Kennedy Ryan, and I know the girls love them some Kennedy Ryan. So I said when my schedule slowed down and I was able to really get into it, I was gonna pick up some Kennedy Rye books. And listen here. I am almost done with before I let go, and I only started that last week and I only read it at night. So I tell myself I'm gonna read like a chapter. I ended up reading like two, three chapters'cause the book is really good. Shout out to Kennedy Ryan for just being an awesome author. Listen, details be detailing and she just pulls you into a really lovely story.

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Interweaves, these cultural relevant moments and like, it was just, it was really sweet. I am enjoying every single page of that book. I've already, I've already ordered the other books in the series. It's not necessarily a series based on what I read on Barnes and Nobles and Amazon. It's basically a, it's a continuation of each character that is in. The books, so I'm loving before I let go. I highly recommend if you're not a reader, start with a lavish book, something that will pull you in and have you laughing and just having a really good time. I talked about it earlier, I feel like a few seasons ago when Gabrielle Union's book came out. There are books out here on these shelves that will have you cackling. You hear me? And one, I always refer to Gabrielle Union's book when I think about Laughing Out Loud. Funny, there was a moment, and I'm not gonna spoil a book for you if you haven't gone and read her first book. That wasn't, it wasn't in her second book. Her second book was good too. But in her first book. I picked up the book, I was reading it through. There is a moment between her and one of her high school bullies that when I said I head back laughing, I had to compose myself from that chapter alone. It was too funny. So. As we enter the fall season and you're getting into your fall tv, both scripted and support the girls that are on YouTube, the girls and the guys that are on YouTube with killing it, just go in there. I just gave you three great recommendations, Tanika, Peyton, Charles, Aaliyah, J. I've given you tons of recommendations and I can. Continue to give you recommendations. Feel free to put it in the comments, and I'll share some individuals, some creators that are online and just really building community in a beautiful way. I'm a part of their community and I love it. So shout out to them. I encourage you to also pick up a little book. You know, get away from the blue lights and consuming all, all the content online. Build some content of your own in real life. Season update now. This is not a big announcement because we started the season with weekly episodes. We tripped off to twice a month, but you guys have showed up and showed out for August, and I am so grateful and I really, really am. Thank you so much for supporting the podcast, and I know some episodes are deeper than others the title is not meant to be intimidating. It is meant to welcome you in to how you define your life and how your divine spirituality aligns with that life. So I always like to bring a little human conversation'cause we're all just human beings trying to live a good life Moving forward, we're going weekly until the end of the season. You heard me, right? Every single week we'll have an episode of How Do You Divine. I have learned so much over this summer, both personally and professionally, and I'm just so excited. For what is to come with the podcast from the partners that we are talking to, and potentially we'll be onboarding and collaborating with to the new season and the level of guests that we're gonna have. I am really excited and above all, truly grateful for all the support and everyone that clicks to watch the likes, the comments, the reviews. Do not forget to review the podcast wherever you are listening and watching I created how do you divine as a space for us to see not only who we are, but how. How we can be different in one community, how our varying definitions on how to live life by words that drive us is the thing that will bring us together. It will bring unity, it will bring honesty, it will bring empathy to the way we operate with one another. God is calling us all to be consistent in some different ways in our life, and I know for me this has been a transformative experience and I'm really, really grateful for all of the support But in order to show up in this season. Expecting abundance and aligning with God's calling over my life. I need to be consistent. And obedient I need to be transparent, um, and vulnerable.'cause I really want us all to grow along this process of building a podcast and building a platform where emotional intelligence is normal, where we talk about. The varying differences in how we define the words that drive our lives and find similarities in that journeys. And if there are differences, which there will be, we can talk through it and allow everyone to feel seen and heard. Because when you live in a divine alignment, it is not about perfection. For the people in the back, it's not about perfection. It's about operating in with a sense of love and persistence and empathy and compassion for one another. To be completely honest and transparent building this podcast has come with its sacrifices, both financially, mentally, emotionally. And if I'm gonna ask you to be bold and courageous in your life, I gotta do the same. So I will be here every single week exploring our divine definitions, one word at a time. Thank you so much for listening to this episode of How Do You Divine? Stick Up In. Thank you for listening to Thank You for listening and watching this episode of Stick Up in Vibes. See you on the next one. Bye.