Retiree Reveals Why She Retired At 56 Without A Purpose | Retirement Reality

After 37 years with the same company, Lissa realized she didn’t need to keep proving her productivity to live a meaningful life. At 56, she stepped away from corporate work, moved through a tough season in her marriage, and started building a version of retirement that feels like one word: freedom.

In this episode of Retirement Reality, Lissa shares how early retirement opened space for last-minute trips to see her daughter, weekday theater in New York, and time with the FIRE community—choices she never had while working full-time. She also gets into the money side in simple terms: decades of steady saving, modest living, her husband staying on for vesting, and how Connecticut’s healthcare options gave them confidence to make the leap.

If you’re a few years from retirement and tired of feeling like you should always be “doing” something, this episode shows how letting go of productivity can make room for a life that finally fits. If it resonates, consider subscribing so you don’t miss the next story.

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Lissa is not a client of Root Financial Partners, LLC and received no compensation for participating in this video. His statements reflect his own opinions and experience and are not indicative of any specific client’s experience and are not a guarantee of results. No cash or non-cash compensation was provided, and no material conflicts are known.

Advisory services are offered through Root Financial Partners, LLC, an SEC-registered investment adviser. This content is intended for informational and educational purposes only and should not be considered personalized investment, tax, or legal advice. Viewing this content does not create an advisory relationship. We do not provide tax preparation or legal services. Always consult an investment, tax or legal professional regarding your specific situation.

The strategies, case studies, and examples discussed may not be suitable for everyone. They are hypothetical and for illustrative and educational purposes only. They do not reflect actual client results and are not guarantees of future performance. All investments involve risk, including the potential loss of principal.

Comments reflect the views of individual users and do not necessarily represent the views of Root Financial. They are not verified, may not be accurate, and should not be considered testimonials or endorsements

Participation in the Retirement Planning Academy or Early Retirement Academy does not create an advisory relationship with Root Financial. These programs are educational in nature and are not a substitute for personalized financial advice. Advisory services are offered only under a written agreement with Root Financial.

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Ari Taublieb, CFP ®, MBA  is the Chief Growth Officer of Root Financial Partners and a Fiduciary Financial Planner specializing in helping clients retire early with confidence.

Transcript

Making Work Optional

SPEAKER_01 0:00

It's one thing to hear about early retirement from me who loves talking about how to retire early with confidence, which if you know me, I don't really want you to retire early if you love your job. I just want you to know when are you in a position to make work optional? And if you love what you do, keep doing it. And if you don't love what you do, go spend your time on what matters most. Because I hate the thought of you working unnecessarily. If you don't need to be working because financially you're in a great spot, I want you to know that. And at the minimum, I want you to know when that will be the case. When do you enter that recreational employment? Now, the best way to learn, in my opinion, is from people who have already done it. So, what I'm gonna be doing is still continuing my interviews because you guys have shared amazing feedback with me via email. I'm just gonna read out one of the recent responses, and this I'm gonna keep anonymous, of course. So if you want to email me what you have found most helpful, please do. It is so fun for me to get to read your responses. You can email me at ari at rootfinancial.com. And this is a response that says, These interviews have changed the way I look at an early retirement. It's fun to hear about these different concepts, but when I see them applied in real life and I can hear the joy and freedom in their voice, it just hits different. So that is a great example of why I love getting to hold these interviews. So I'm gonna continue to play these interviews. These are all live right now on YouTube. So if you prefer to listen on YouTube for any reason, I know many of you who listen here on the podcast go, yeah, YouTube is not my thing. Too many ads, it's just annoying. Totally get that. I listen to many history podcasts on my podcast app, and I recently just did an audiobook with my wife. We just drove up to Carmel and from Los Angeles, and we listened to an audiobook called My Husband's Wife. And that was quite an interesting mystery. So if you need that, if you're doing a long road trip, um, I encourage you to try to guess who you think did it. It's one of those who'd done it. So the whole time I'm making bad tax jokes, and Alice didn't laugh at any of them, but I did. So, regardless, wanted to just quickly share. I totally get it. If you prefer listening on the podcast app, we're gonna hop right into the interview. But before we do, just a quick reminder. My name is Ari Talblebe. I'm a certified financial planner, host of the Early Retirement Podcast, and I love this stuff. If you cannot tell, and if you want to schedule a free call with us to learn about how we help people just like you retire with confidence, you can do so. You'll see a link in the description of this video. Now let's go hear from some real people who retired early so we can figure out when maybe we can retire and what we should do. Thanks, guys. When you're working, you feel, oh my gosh, I have to be productive. Is that how you felt during your working years or no?

SPEAKER_00 2:38

I yeah, I think so. I mean, society sort of tells us that, right? That, you know, in order to be a productive member of society, you have to be working a full-time job or whatever those things are. And I think if we're constantly going and never like fulfilling our own needs or filling our own cups so that we can help fill others, whether that's our family, our job, um, something else, I think it's important that we give ourselves time to do those things.

Meet Lissa And Episode Setup

Freedom Over Productivity Norms

SPEAKER_01 3:09

What I'm doing in this new show, Retirement Reality, is having heartfelt, candid conversations with people who have already retired so you can hear from them what worked well, what didn't, and everything in between. I hope you enjoy. And if you're retired and you want to personally come share your story on a future episode, there's a link right below this in the description of this episode where you can apply to be a guest. Now go enjoy the episode. My guest today is honest about what it's like to go through a marriage and have ups and downs, honest about what it's like retiring and finally having the time to pursue what you actually want to do, and how you can still love your boss and want to quit. And what actually finally prompted her to initiate looking at retirement seriously was telling her, or actually asking her coworker, hey, are you gonna be okay if I do decide to retire just out of pure human kindness? And they were like, Are you crazy? Like, go look out for yourself. You gotta do what you gotta do. And that's when she finally said, you know what? Yeah, I am going to do that. Maybe for the first time in myself, in my life, should I say put myself first? She tears, she tells us, you can see I'm just kidding, so I just recorded it with her, and now I am doing this intro, and you can see I'm already screwing it up. But we leave it in. This is all transparent. You guys can see I'm a human, I make mistakes all the time. And maybe in the future I'll roll a whole video of just all of my errors that I do say consistently. But the reason I'm excited for you guys to see this conversation is because Lisa, yes, that is her name. I had said Lisa, but it is Lisa without the me. So Melissa without the meh. Now, she is so honest and transparent. The thing that I love most about her is she reminds me of my mom in the way that she is able to say, wow, I have different children. I have one children who's very independent, literally riding motorcycles, and I have another child who's doing awesome work, master's in chemistry, and just want to make sure that my kids don't feel pressured to do what I did, which was retire early. And she's also very vocal about her community of literally the fire community, financial independence retire early, which of course, as many of you know, I prefer a different definition. Financial independence recreational employment. Are you working because you want to or because you have to? But regardless, that's enough rambling for me. Let's get to the episode. Welcome back to another episode of Retirement Reality. I am with Lista. She kindly informed me that I said her name incorrectly at the beginning, which I said Lista, but it's Lista. So Melissa without the me. Now, what we're talking about today is okay, how does retirement change if you're working but your spouse isn't working? And today we get to talk to the spouse who's retired. So it's gonna be a fun conversation. I'm excited for you guys to hear it. Now, Lista, I asked my guest the same exact question at the very beginning every single time, and I'm gonna ask that to you now. If there was one word you could use to describe your retirement so far, what would it be?

SPEAKER_00 6:10

Uh freedom.

SPEAKER_01 6:12

Freedom. I've gotten that answer a lot. It seems to be a theme that comes up a lot. Now, when you applied to be a guest on this show, which I'm grateful for, and all of you out there who are listening today, if you want to be a guest and share your story, you can in the link below. You had shared, hey, I want to talk about why people feel you always have to have this need to do something and how I approach retirement a little differently. So before we get into how you retired and financial stuff and the transition, do you mind sharing more about why you shared that?

SPEAKER_00 6:44

Yeah, um I think in general in life, there is this um thought process that we constantly have to be doing something to be a productive member of society, or that there always has to be an end game or a goal. And I and although I think it's important to have a plan and to know what you'd like to do in retirement, right? You can't just sit on the beach every day, right? Um that's never gonna work. Um my husband's not a beach person anyway, so um, but I think you know, I would like to have the freedom to just say, okay, today I'm just gonna have a lazy day. And maybe the weather is crappy outside, and so I decide I'm gonna stay in and just binge watch TV, which I actually don't do very often, but um but you know, it's I think it's that process where just enjoying the time in whatever way you decide is right for you. Because every person is gonna have different needs, but I think we have to think about not always having to do something to have a life that's well lived. Obviously, we're doing things, right? Whether that's I take a walk in the woods or if I go for a bike ride or um go have lunch with a friend, the freedom to be able to do those things in my own time and when I choose to do them, as opposed to like constantly having to feel like I need to produce something for someone for my life to have meaning.

unknown 8:44

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 8:44

So maybe that I I guess maybe that's what it's about.

SPEAKER_01 8:47

You can have a purposeful life without productivity. And that I imagine is a hard shift when you're working, you feel, oh my gosh, I have to be productive. Is that how you felt during your working years or no?

From FIRE Research To Decision

SPEAKER_00 9:00

I yeah, I think so. I mean, I think society sort of tells us that, right? That you know, in order to be a productive member of society, you have to be, you know, working a full-time job or whatever those things are. And I think if we're constantly going and never like fulfilling our own needs, right? Or filling our own cups so that we can help fill others, whether that's our family, our job, um, something else, I think it's important that we give ourselves time to do those things.

SPEAKER_01 9:37

I want to learn more about Lissa's retirement story. So do you mind sharing you said, at least on the forum here, kind of when you retired, but I'd love to hear more what age you were when you retired, specifically how you made the transition. Give us the story.

Marriage Strain, Growth, And Coaching

SPEAKER_00 9:53

Yeah. Um, so it's sort of interesting. I started researching the uh the fire community, um, thinking about, you know, is that even possible for me? Um, you know, I worked at the same job for 37 years in the corporate world. And um, you know, started with a small company, we were maybe 12 people, and then um we were acquired by a different company back in 2004, transitioned in 2005, and um when I started working for the original company, um the owner decided to do a 401k for the company, for the employees, um, for himself too, obviously, because the company was doing well, he didn't want to pay the government. Um, so if he created this 401k, you know, we could all benefit from it, including himself. And so I started investing in my 401k in 1991, I think. And so all those years of compounding, we all know how that works. Um and then looking at uh there was just some changes within the last company, and some of the changes I wasn't thrilled with. I had an amazing boss, so that made the job really easy. Um I got along great with him, had a really great relationship. Um, but there were other internal changes happening in the company. And so when my husband and I got connected with the fire community, um, I really started looking at my finances um more in detail. And I said to myself, wow, can I do this? And um wasn't really planning. I was thinking, oh, I'll stay until I'm 59 and a half, until I can, you know, access all of my accounts. And then I started looking into it and I was like, oh, there's other ways I can access my accounts. And so, a long story short, um with those changes within the company and also changes in my personal life, um, my husband and I went through some really tough times. And so there was a lot of sort of reevaluating my life and what I wanted for me and um you know what I wanted to do going forward and being in that corporate environment wasn't it anymore. And with the changes within the company, and then you know, reevaluating everything for ourselves and financially realizing that we were okay and we were in a good position. And so um June of last year, I was uh just turned had just turned 56 and decided that I was done. Um the company offered sort of a separation package, so I took advantage of that. Um that allowed me to have income until the end of last year, and so I didn't really need to tap into any of that money. Um and you know, so that's sort of the the short story.

SPEAKER_01 13:07

Kudos to you, Alyssa. And I am honestly impressed, is not the word I would use because I'd go further than that and say proud, because it is not easy to retire at 56 when people are even sharing. What are you gonna do? And then there's odd jealousy that comes up of who do you think you are retiring at 56? And I can see your head nodding, which I want to hear more of. I want to go to the long story long versions of some of these because I love this stuff. Now, only share what you're comfortable with. But you had shared, hey, I started to personally look at some things because of just life stuff that went on. Was that health-oriented? Was it marriage-oriented? Was it um work-oriented? What was that?

SPEAKER_00 13:48

Um a little bit of work and personal, but it was really personal in our marriage. Um, we uh dealt with some pretty significant relationship issues. Um you know, I'm sure people can use, you know, pretty obvious things. Um, and we've we've talked about it um with friends and family, and um I actually decided to uh pursue a coaching career. Um, so life coaching, and that was part of that whole transition with you know my relationship issues and transitioning from my job, and I was like, what do I really want to do? And so it was I I think I'm gonna take this course and um learn about becoming a life coach. And um through that process, I've made a one of some amazing connections. Um had a lot of my own growth, which is great. Um, you know, my husband and I have since um you know worked through all of those issues. Um I think there are still times where it's hard, but it becomes um you're able to work through things easier because of the work that we've done. Um so it was it was a lot of work. Um, but on the other side, you know, uh we have we have a pretty great relationship now.

SPEAKER_01 15:27

Um I appreciate the transparency because there have been people who come on the show and shared how they decided divorce made most sense for them and how they're grateful they're doing it. There's other people that go, we're glad we worked through it. There's others that shared how in their environment of work they essentially became an addict to alcohol because if they didn't, they wouldn't get the promotion they thought they would get. So I hope this does feel like an open space to share. So thank you for doing so. Are you an active life coach right now?

SPEAKER_00 15:52

So I'm I'm in the process of getting my certification. Um, I've worked with people just pro bono um at this point um and hoping to have my certification by the end of the year.

Telling The Boss And Separation Plan

SPEAKER_01 16:04

So very exciting. Well, but as it goes out, it might be closer to that point. So if it's of interest, we could of course put that in the link below. And if someone is interested in a session, which you'd be shocked by the amount of comments from people who go, Wow, I feel like this lady, I retired early, I had friends, and now all of a sudden the friends that I thought were so close to me were only being kind to me because we're at work all the time, and now we're not really connecting, and now I don't have that sense of community, but I thought I should be productive, and all these things come up. So I think you could be a valuable resource for that. Now, going back to you and your story, so you retired. It sounds like your husband is still working, though. Is that he is okay. Was that an odd discussion to say, hey, I'm I'm gonna stop working? Was it supportive?

SPEAKER_00 16:52

No, he was he was definitely supportive. Um and you know, we've had transitions throughout our marriage, right? There was a couple of points where he was unemployed for a little while. Um, and so my job sort of carried us through that. Um, there was um, you know, points where I wasn't working after I had my kids. Um, so you know, he was sort of the one carrying the load at that point, and so um I I think we've always been pretty much like have each other's back, other than that one issue. Um, but you know, knowing that we'll make it work, and even in those hard times, you know, we had a a a weird uh camping trip one time, and this just sort of relates to my thinking um and how we work through things. But we took our kids on a camping trip, uh the truck broke down on the way there, it didn't break down, but the transmission was going, and thankfully we made it to the campground, but we ended up having to take um the municipal trolley um to the local Walmart to go buy food. So we because we didn't plan to we didn't bring anything because we thought, oh, we'll just get food when we get there. And we get there and we're like, oh shit, sorry. We have to go get food. And so we gave the kids their backpacks, we're like, hey, we're going on an adventure. And we we jumped on the trolley, went to the local Walmart and got what we needed and went back to the campground. And you know, it while it all worked out fine. Um, it was a good trip, and we have a story to tell now, you know. Um, so it was sort of funny, but you know, for me it was like what can we what can we pull out of it that it's still we're still okay, you know, even though it seemed crappy at the time and obviously it really stunk because we had to spend money on getting a new transition or transmission for the truck. But um, you know, it all worked out and we still had a great vacation. Um we just had to spend a little bit more money.

SPEAKER_01 19:15

Yeah, you made the most of the situation. And you know, I'm two months into my marriage, so I'll be coming to you in the future. So Yeah, congratulations. Thank you very much. Um, I do, I'm just curious. So one of the things that you already said a few times is freedom. And when you say freedom, literally I see you light up. I love asking, and I'm so happy to ask this to you. What are some of the things? You already said binging, but you don't even do it that often. It's just that you could if you wanted to. What are some of the things that you're now able to pursue that you could not have done because you're working?

SPEAKER_00 19:50

Yeah, so um immediately. Like, you know, my daughter lives in Maine now. So, you know, I'm able to go and see her whenever I want. Um, and I was able to do that right after I left my job. Um, like the following, like two weeks later, um, she invited me to come up, um, wanted to go to a local um fundraiser for uh an organization up there. And it's it's just a really fun event. Um, it's all based on, you know, w uh working with ceramics and and that's something she really likes. So I thought, you know, if my daughter wants to spend time with me and she's an adult now, I'm gonna take advantage of that. Yes. And so I get to do that, and I don't have to ask anyone. You know, I'm obviously I tell my husband, hey, you know, I'm gonna go and and visit for a few days. And then um one of the other things I really love is um going to the theater. Um, I've been a theater nerd since I was in high school. And so I'm able to go to New York and see a show um whenever I want. Um, it could be in the middle of the week, it could be on the weekend, and um, it's just a really, really fun time. Um, and it's something that I really, really enjoy. And I don't have to think about when I want to do it. I can just do it tomorrow if I choose.

SPEAKER_01 21:12

Amazing. And you deserve it, and I'm so stoked that you get to do it. How who are you doing it with? Your husband's working. Now, I imagine your child, I love that they want to hang out with you, but they're probably busy as well. Oftentimes I'll hear, hey, yes, I retired, it's awesome, but I'm 57, I'm 58. My friends still have a few more years. So who are you doing it with?

One Spouse Retired, One Still Working

SPEAKER_00 21:33

Yeah, so on the weekends I can do that with my husband, or I can do it with family and friends. Um, if it's during during the week, um I'm really it's uh spending time with my cousin who is much older than me, or not much older, but she's uh almost 80 and um was a teacher. And so I just I have a lot of respect for her. Um Always got along great with her. So um I done some things with her, you know, during the day. Um and um we connect with the fire community still. So there's a group of people that we still meet with. Um actually we still meet a couple times a month. Um our original group that we connected with back in 2022. Um and um four times a year we all meet in New York. Um, not all of us, but there's you know a handful of people whoever can make it. Um and we'll just find a you know a group place where we can go. There's um a place called the Hue down in New York City, and so we'll all meet there. Um grab something to eat, or you know, if we've already eaten, we just hang out and talk and you know, all things fire.

SPEAKER_01 22:53

That's awesome. And for those who are unfamiliar, I 99% of you listening probably are, but that stands for financial independence retire early. And I made up my own definition, which is financial independence recreational employment. Are you working because you want to or because you have to? And there are certain people that, and I'm this is by no means you lista, but who are saying, oh my gosh, I gotta retire early, I hate my job, I'm gonna work four jobs and I'm gonna sacrifice my health. And I've seen situations where people put themselves into the ground, they retire at 35 and they're like, Yeah, I don't know what I'm gonna do. And there's other people that go, yeah, that's not really my definition. Mine is I just want to work truly because I want to. And if I don't have to, if work changes, as you alluded to, politics, whatever it may be, you can walk away. And I imagine it's a much better feeling even while you're working. So what I would love to learn a little bit more about before we go into some finances, if you're open to sharing, is just the transition into retirement. Was that a difficult one? Meaning like logistically, sharing to your boss, hey, I'm retiring early. Was it, oh no, we gotta have you? Let's say you have no idea the value to the company. I can already see you smiling there. But that transition is something that gives a lot of people anxiety too of. So I'd love to hear about that.

SPEAKER_00 24:09

Yeah, I don't think I really had any anxiety about it. Um, you know, we had, like I said, we had talked to other people in the fire community, um, have been researching and thinking about it since 2022. And um I was a little n nervous to tell my boss, and more so for um, I had someone who was working under me at the time, and you know, I I was concerned for her and her job, and you know, would they keep her in her position? And so it was more and you know, her and I actually I talked to her about it and I said, look at I'm I think I'm planning to do this. And I said, I just want you to know, like I want to do what I can to support you in making sure you still have a job here. And she was like, Oh my god, you know, that's so kind of you, but you have to do for you, you know, and it just I guess it was, you know, me worrying about other people and other things, right? Instead of taking care of myself first. Um, and then so once I transitioned to like, okay, this has got to be it for me and what I want. And I can't worry about everyone else. I I love her, she was an amazing uh coworker and you know, staff person. Um, but in the end, it's just like, okay, I have to make this decision for me. And so it was around December, and I was like, I said to my husband, I said, I think I'm gonna make the transition. And I, because of their separation plan that they offer, I had to let them know by the end of March to be done at the end of June. So they had three months um of time. And I was able to really, you know, transition everything that I was working on um pretty easily within that three-month period. So I didn't feel as though I was leaving them in a lurch. Um, you know, I I did all of the things that I needed to do before I left to make sure everything was taken care of, um, you know, whether that was transition to someone else or they decided not to even continue doing it. Um so when I went to my boss, and I think it was sometime in February, and I said, I think I'm gonna give my notice. And he's like, What? He's like, No, he's like, you can't leave before me. He's like, I'm supposed to leave before you. And we always had this joke. Like, I I would say to him, I said, Well, when you leave, I'm leaving too. Um, just because he was such an easy person to work for. And um, he was really great. Like he respected my opinions and you know uh uh totally backed my judgment on things. And so it made it really easy to work there because I knew that I pretty much had autonomy to, you know, make whatever decisions I needed to make in the work that needed to be done. And he knew that I would get it done. Um so when I told him, you know, he was like, he's like, good for you, and he was super supportive. Um, you know, he was bummed that I was leaving, but he was super supportive. And then oddly enough, he left this year.

SPEAKER_01 27:35

Wow. This this sounds like, and I'm gonna butcher the quote, but someone once said, bosses make you feel like they're important, leaders make you feel like you're important. And it sounds like he was more of a leader, and it's wild. But you had shared there, you shared, you know, he made my opinion feel valued. And in today's society, that's like an admirable trait, which is wild because it's like, why would all of our opinions not be heard? But I appreciate you sharing all of that. And I think one of the golden moments of that, the nugget I took, is you were being a good person going, look, I don't want to leave my potential associate high and dry. And they're like, Listen, are you kidding me? Like, go do you, and you're like, Oh, you're right, I am gonna go do me. So kudos to you there. Now, your husband's obviously still working. Every couple's different. I see certain couples where they go, look, I manage my finances on my own, um, but we do certain things together. I know everyone does it differently. How do you guys approach it as a couple where one is still working and one's retired?

Finding Community After Work

SPEAKER_00 28:37

Yeah, um, you know, we talked about it and there's it's but it's sort of a selfish reason that that he's staying. Um he he's only been, he works for the city, a local city. And so he's only been there for three years. And in order to be fully vested, he has to be there for five. And so it's really just about them. I mean, it he does love his job. He loves the people he works with. So again, like having a job that you love and you know, people that you enjoy working with makes the job so much easier, right? And it makes it so that you don't mind getting up every day to go to work. And so he has that, which is great, but on the other side of that, like it's just an it's a bonus, basically, right? It's not necessarily that we need it, but he he does enjoy his work and he does enjoy the people that he works with. And so but the city puts in eight percent and he only has to put in six. So that's another 14% over five years that we'd be throwing away if he left. And so it is sort of a little bit of a selfish reason.

SPEAKER_01 29:47

Yeah, and I do it all the time, to be honest, where it's hey, I can't walk away from this. I'm in my highest earning years, they're putting this away. It feels like throw my and and I'm not even miserable. The issue becomes is if there was something you guys really wish you could do, and financially it wasn't really necessary, but it doesn't sound like that's the case.

SPEAKER_00 30:04

Yeah, I mean, financially we're we are good. Um we we'd be okay even if you left. Um, you know, Connecticut has an insurance marketplace that is separate from the ACA, and you know, some of the subsidies um once we stop working are pretty, you know, they're they're convenient. So um, you know, I know you you've talked about that a lot on your podcast and your YouTube videos. And I I thought about that a lot and when I started looking at it, and I was like, okay, we're good until he's done. And then, you know, who knows what the marketplace will be like at that point. Um, so you know, there could be changes, right? Like if something drastic happens, maybe he ends up staying for another year or two because of the medical insurance. But it in this current day, we would be okay even if he chose to leave.

SPEAKER_01 31:06

Wonderful. How old are your children today?

Modest Living And High Savings

SPEAKER_00 31:09

Uh, our youngest is 22, our oldest is 25.

SPEAKER_01 31:12

Okay. I ask because I it sounds like you enjoyed your job and had a good leader. I want to learn a little bit more. Your husband enjoys his job. Something I hear so often is, yeah, I'm retiring after 30 years. I'm finally gonna pursue what I want to do. And I go, well, the last 30 years, did you just do nothing you wanted to do? And they'll go, sometimes, yeah. It was I was doing a job because it paid the bills and I didn't really have the ability to pursue my passion. How are you speaking to your children about, hey, go do what you want to do, but also recognize, look, I'm retiring early. How do you share that with them?

Money Mindsets From Family History

SPEAKER_00 31:45

Yeah, it um I think there's a couple of different things. So, you know, A, it's you know, work do the work, but hopefully you find something that you enjoy so that you can save. And maybe you also, you know, pursue fire, but everybody's different. So it has to be what they want. So the conversations are really um and more so since I left. You know, doing the job that I did for as long as I did allowed me to be in the position I am. But that doesn't mean that that's what they have to do, right? And we've talked about this, like success is different for every person. And what does success mean, you know, to you versus what it means to me? Um we live a pretty modest lifestyle, so you know, I guess it's what do you want from your life? And that I've left up to them to choose. Um I will support them in whatever way they need, if I'm able. Um but knowing that it's their life to live, and whatever that whatever that means for them, right? Whether that's um pursuing some amazing career, um, my daughter has a master's degree in chemistry, so she's pretty smart. Um they're both very, very talented. Um and very um I I would say my youngest daughter is really independent. Um she's a motorcycle rider. Um so you know, she's uh not afraid to take chances, I guess. And I would say a little bit of me was I was probably more reserved um in my personal life, in my, you know, especially after I have kids. Um maybe not so much before we had kids, but I would say definitely after I had kids, I became more reserved, more responsible, right? You you have to be responsible for someone else besides yourself.

Talking To Adult Kids About Success

SPEAKER_01 34:09

So you remind me, and this is of the highest compliments. I hope you take, you would be best friends and you remind me of my mother. And the reason I say that is because my mom gave my, I'm one of three boys. She'll joke that I'm the center, even though I'm the middle child. And I needed very different things to my brother. So I was in public school, my brother was in private school, that flipped different times, she gave us what she needed. And my dad is the one of the founders of the X Games. So when you talk about your Yeah, when you talk about your daughter being a motorcycle rider, my dad makes documentaries, and they are all around Travis Pastrana and all the motorcycle lingo that you know, I grew up there at the X Games. I was one of the little kids with the flags, because my dad's like, we need someone else to come in here and do it. So like I grew up in that world and a fun story for you. And this is, I think I've shared this before, but my dad grew up going, I don't want anyone to get on a motorcycle that's in my family. It's just a matter of when, not if. So what my dad did is he took us to a local hospital and we walked around. And he said, Look at all these people here. Do you want to be like them? And I said, No way. He goes, they're all motorcycle riders, but they weren't. He just lied. And that was enough to scare me away from ever getting on a motorcycle. But my brother had a different edge, and we both saw the same thing. And he was like, I just think it would be fun though. I mean, look at this. And so it just proved, you know, and my mom was so good about being like, got it. So, like, that's of more of interest to you and not to you. And I feel like you would do a similar job. And what's cool is it sounds like even talking about money can be discussed at the dinner table, which is not in many households. Is that the case or is it, hey, shut up, mom?

SPEAKER_00 35:54

No, I think it's it's definitely more now. Um, but I think, you know, there are times where they're like, yeah, okay, we don't need to, we don't need to hear about it anymore. You know, but it's I think I try to I would I guess I would say I try to um sprinkle the salt and pepper. Right? Um plant the seeds of of financial independence. So that hopefully, you know, they again I think of it as, you know, if you're able to work for 20 years instead of 37 years, wouldn't that be great?

SPEAKER_01 36:35

Yes. I see what I'm reading between the lines. You'll make pasta and you'll spell out compound interest or rule of 72 or just things real mild in there. Um okay. I'd love one of the things you said is hey, we're not big spenders, we live modestly. And I say this as a joke, but listen, I've had people who have said, yeah, so I live, it's a pretty frugal lifestyle. It's like 15,000, 20,000 a month. It's just kind of what we need to get by. And I go, wow, uh, that is modest to some and definitely not to others. So do you mind sharing? Not of course the exact amounts, but what general amount do you find every month you're spending to live your let's quote unquote dream life as a retiree?

Final Advice For Near-Retirees

SPEAKER_00 37:17

Yeah, um I I probably won't share actual numbers. Yeah, no need if you're okay with that. Of course. But um we'll actually probably spend more once my husband's retired than what we spend now. Um only because our accounts are okay, right? And of course, you know, we've we've saved a lot. Um, I mean, uh and I never really, I mean, honestly, there was years where I I never really thought about it because I just knew that I was putting this money in there. Um, but between the two of us, there were times where we were saving as much as 35% of our income.

unknown 38:03

Wow.

SPEAKER_00 38:05

You know, we we still led an okay life, right? We vacationed usually two two weeks out of the year, which some people will say, oh, well, that's not great. Um but we would do, you know, day trips. We took our kids to the theater. Um, we, you know, we have a lot of properties, so the kids would have their friends over, and you know, we'd have a Halloween party or whatever. And so there was just um family parties, you know, my my parents were married for 60 years, so we had, you know, a 60th wedding anniversary with all of the family and extended family. Um so you know, but we didn't really and you know, we had new cars, but we would keep them for years. You know, I would say, you know, the average was five or six years um for every vehicle, some more than that. And now we don't buy new vehicles, we buy off-lease vehicles. So um generally the the majority of them have low mileage. It allows us to have a newer car, um, but not have to spend the money that once you drive off the lot, it depreciates in value by you know 25%. Let somebody else pay the depreciation.

Outro, Disclaimers, And How To Engage

SPEAKER_01 39:24

Understood. So now let me ask this, and apologies, um, Lisa, for the interruptions. But what happens sometimes in my virtual interviews is one, I get too excited and I interrupt. Or number two, um, it's hard to tell when someone's finished versus when we're in person. So I don't mean to interrupt, so I apologize. So please tell me shut up if you're like, hey, I'm still going here. Now, what I would love to truly go deeper on is not necessarily the exact finances of okay, how much do you have in your 401k versus Roth and brokerage accounts? But it sounds like, you know, you were educated along the way on, hey, I want to retire early. The idea of retiring early is just attractive. You're in the fire community now. But I want to go back to young Lissa. Were your parents going, look, you've got to start as soon as you can start saving for your future? Was it no, you decided, you know what, I'm gonna just look into it. How did that happen?

SPEAKER_00 40:19

Yeah, I mean, that's what's funny. Um, my husband and I have talked about this a lot. Um, there aren't a lot of people within our immediate family that are really good with money. And um really they're not I I don't know that they're all living paycheck to paycheck, but there's probably many of them that are. Um and you know, I saw my uncle retire early. I saw um, I think he was 59 when he retired. Um, I saw uh my cousin and her husband retire early. He retired at 53 from UPS. Um, so he had a really great pension, still does. Um, and she was a teacher. Um Connecticut changed some rules, so she got out before they changed the rules, so she was okay. Um so I did I saw some of that, and you know, I saw people um struggle too. Um, and I definitely didn't want to be one of those people. Um, so you know, we we worked hard to ensure that we were gonna be okay.

SPEAKER_01 41:32

Lisa, here's how I like to end the show. So I'm going to shut up for the next one to two minutes, and you get to talk to someone who's going to be retiring in the next few years, let's call it five years. You could literally talk to anyone in your head. You can think of a friend right now and be like, if I could tell them anything, it would be this regarding productivity or whatever it is you think they want to hear. I will not interrupt in any way, and that's how I like to end these shows. So, whoever you're thinking about, or just general public, someone wants to retire in the next five years, and they go, Lisa, what would you tell me? What would you say?

SPEAKER_00 42:07

Um, I think the most important thing would be to decide what you want to do in retirement. What does it look like for you? Right? Because that there has to be some idea, right? Like you're not just gonna sit on the beach, you're not just gonna lay in bed every day. Um, being able to have those things that you decide, hey, I've always wanted to do this, and I've always wanted to do this, and now I have the freedom to do that. So I'm gonna put those things on my list. And you know, I know a lot of people talk about that bucket list, and I would say, you know, that's important, but also like what's important in your life, in your immediate life, right? Like your family, those people that you might want to spend time with that you haven't spent as much time with, or um those things that you need to get rid of that allow you to have um even more, right? Because we always think like we have to accumulate all these things, and then you accumulate all those things for all those years. Um, and it ends up being just stuff. Um and yes, some of the things could have value or some of the things could have meaning for you know your family members or whatever, but I think in the end, um you can't take those things with you. So what do you want? What do you want to create for yourself that gives you the pleasure, uh, joy, um and the excitement to get up every day?

SPEAKER_01 43:53

Brilliant. Well, Lisa, for those who are watching now, you might have a link in the description. I can Guarantee it based off of your certification timing, but you might have a website, and so anyone can reach out to you. I imagine I don't know if you are taking new clients, how often you're doing it, what the business could even look like, because I doubt you want another full-time job, but it sounds like that's something that's of interest to you. So we'll put that down below if it makes sense. And then, guys, please give Lissa some love. She decided to come share her story. If you want to share your story on a future episode, you can apply to do that in the description below. And we'll see you guys next time. If you enjoyed this episode of Retirement Reality, check out how we help people retire with confidence. You can see we have an FAQ section on our website. If you just hover over the resources tab, you can go ahead and see this FAQ section here and learn everything about what it's like to work with us, including our personalized planning process, a quick overview of how everything works. Do you have enough money to become a client? Where will your money be? Everything from tax planning to fees. We are extremely transparent and want to make sure that you're working with someone that resonates with you. Hopefully, you enjoyed this episode. And if you once again want to be a guest on a future show so that you can share your story, you can see that in the link of this episode. Thanks. Thank you all, as always, for listening to the early retirement podcast. I love getting to host these shows and make different content for you guys every single week. I've not missed a single week in years, and that is because I love getting to do this. Now, please be smart about this before you actually execute any strategy that you see me talk about or hear me talk about, should I say, please talk to your financial advisor, your tax preparer, your estate attorney. Please be smart about this. None of this should be construed as financial advice. This is for fun, educational, informational purposes only. Once again, just quick disclaimer here, guys. Please be smart about this. Appreciate you listening as always. And you can, of course, submit a question on my website, early retirementpodcast.com. If you, of course, want me to address a specific case study or topic. I will not promise I can get to it, but I respond to every single person. And if I find it will be helpful for a lot of people, I will absolutely make an episode on it. At the very least, give you some insight. That's it. Thanks, guys.