Character is the Solution to Recovery, Relapse and Personal Growth

Unlock the secrets to rebuilding your character as we navigate the transformative journey of recovery. Imagine being able to confront your issues with honesty and reshape your life with intention and purpose. Through our latest episode on the 1% in Recovery podcast, we promise to guide you through crucial steps that not only help you overcome addiction but also help you construct a more reliable and positive self. Discover the power of mindset change to consistently make the right choices and take charge of your life. We emphasize the importance of setting daily goals to keep you on track and committed to your personal growth, reinforcing the idea that recovery is a path toward living a life filled with direction and purpose.

But recovery is not just about overcoming addiction—it's about creating a fulfilling life rich with meaningful experiences and relationships. Learn how practices like going to the gym, participating in therapy, and working with a recovery coach can elevate your journey. We delve into the significance of finding balance through praying, meditating, and slowing down. Building strong relationships with family and friends, although demanding, offers unparalleled fulfillment. With over 25 years of experience guiding individuals through recovery, we invite you to discover how to laugh, work hard, and love unconditionally, ultimately leading you to a life you truly deserve. Don't miss this episode if you're ready to take a step toward healing and growth.

Chapters

• 0:02 Character Development in Recovery
• 11:51 Roadmap to Recovery

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:02

How to recover. I'll tell it to you straightforward, in three easy steps. They require work. Welcome again to another episode of the 1% in Recovery podcast, where we encourage you to laugh every day, to work hard, work hard in recovery, work hard in your relationships, work hard in your job, business, school, just work. And to love unconditionally. You put more love out in the universe, you will get love back tenfold. You'll get so much love, love you don't even know what to do with it. So laugh, work, love. Remember. Your EQ is your IQ. Recovery is beautiful and you cannot outthink an emotional issue. What we've been encouraging people to do is to join the Facebook group Recovery Freedom Circle. Within the Recovery Freedom Circle is a community. Everybody is involved, everybody has a voice. Everybody can talk about what their goals are, what they dream to accomplish, as well as questions about a step, about recovery, about healing, about relationships. Could be also something about motivational or inspirational quote or some type of quick little snippet or story. The key thing is that everybody has a voice, everybody can participate, everyone can support each other, because here at Recovery Freedom Circle, the 1% in Recovery podcast, what we're trying to do is to get everybody to live their best life. So, with that, join the Facebook group Recovery Freedom Circle.

Speaker 1: 1:57

Now let's jump into this week's episode. It is about character. Why is character so important? In essence, you cannot recover until you address your character, change your character and build and develop better character.

Speaker 1: 2:16

When you're an addict, your character is, first of all, unstable. Your character is up and down. It is unreliable. There is nothing that is consistent. There is also a lot of consistent bad behavior, negative character traits, not living by spiritual principles, not being the true, you principles not being the true.

Speaker 1: 2:46

You See what addiction does? Unfortunately, it robs us of ourselves. We lose ourselves. That is why we are so lonely. That is why we isolate. That is why we chase and escape into this fake world of addiction gambling, alcohol, drugs, pills. It's all a facade. You will never, never get to where you need to go and I know a lot of people try to minimize what they're doing. They'll say I'm not that bad. You got to keep asking yourself. Or you got to try to justify. You're not that bad. Well, you are that bad.

Speaker 1: 3:36

Someone needs to tell you you're full of it and you got to change. And the way to change is you look at your character. That's why I always begin with honesty. You first kind of just be honest with yourself. Can you be honest with yourself? Can you look yourself in the mirror and say, okay, what is wrong? A lot of some people say is that when I hit my rock bottom, I couldn't even look at myself in a mirror. Well, that just shows you that you're living a lie. You're going nowhere, you have no purpose, you have no direction, you procrastinate, you get bored, you're depressed, you have high anxiety, your relationships are all fractured or they're all kind of distant. There's no deepness into it. So we have to address your character.

Speaker 1: 4:29

Now, what are the three ways to truly, truly recover and really get you in on the right track? I'll tell you what. So how to do this Now? The best way would be if you go through the system Recovery Freedom Circle system, where I go through 72 questions, but I'll give you kind of some things to think about so you can start moving forward as you evaluate me or evaluate others.

Speaker 1: 5:05

Number one you've got to change your mindset into doing the next right thing. I know a lot of people say, well, you got to address, you got to stop your addiction. Yes, but here's the thing. So know, a lot of people say well, you got to address, you got to stop your addiction, yes, but here's the thing. So many people relapse. The question really becomes when you relapse, are you going to stay in the addiction or are you going to make it a one day, several day, one week at the most, one month relapse and you get back into recovery? And recovery can mean a lot of different things. It could be meetings, it could be outside therapy, it could be in treatment, it could be hiring recovery coaches. It can involve a number of things, but the key thing is that you're willing to address and take responsibility for your life. See, that's the number one thing in recovery is you start to take responsibility for your life. You're in charge of you. That's why you can control you. You have no control. Even if you are married, even if you have kids and parents, you can't control them and they can't control you.

Speaker 1: 6:18

At the end of the day, you're going to do things that excite you, that move you, that want you to get ahead, but it really starts with you got to have that mentality. If you want to change, you got to do the next right thing. The next right thing may be to just say I need to do something. I'm going to write down my goals. I'm going to go to a meeting. I'm going to start eating healthy. I'm going to go actually go to the gym or run three miles Something that is productive. I'm going to start reading a book that's going to enlighten me, give me such more self-awareness, something You've got to do, the next right thing. And that has become just a mentality. Just say I wake up and go. You know what I'm going to do, the next right thing today.

Speaker 1: 7:03

Just focus on these 24 hours, what you can do positively today for yourself, for your family, for your friends, for your business. To make money, to study, to get ahead. You've got to do the next right thing. That's how it begins. Number two you've got to list your top three goals and every day you've got to look at them. Like, my top three goals are getting married, but it's going to have a honeymoon on one of those, but it's going to have a honeymoon on one of those over-the-water bungalows in Bora Bora. Second one is get on a TEDx stage and the third one is to hike as well as dive in the Galapagos Islands. I look at those goals every day. It keeps me focused when you look at your goals. You don't have time to worry about alcohol, drugs or gambling or any other addiction. It gets you focused. The thing that addicts lack the most is focus, direction, purpose. Goals provide that and that really also just leads into the third thing.

Speaker 1: 8:24

What is the third thing for recovery? Personal mantra. You've got to know who you are. You've got to say it. It's no different than when people say the serenity prayer every day, or if you go to meetings and you hear how it works. You hear it every day.

Speaker 1: 8:41

You have to come up with a personal mantra. So when I wake up in the morning, I do three things. Number one for me, it's prayer. I believe I have to get on my knees, pray and I'm grateful Number one, for life. Number two, that I have the ability to do something today productive, as well as the relationships and everything else the things that I have in my life. It's always about what you have, not what you're trying to get. You've got to just be grateful for what you have and you make the most of it as you strive to improve whatever situation you are in. And from saying that gratitude prayer, I go into my personal mantra.

Speaker 1: 9:31

I believe that your personal mantra is the second most important thing, because it really feeds who you are and you tell yourself every day into your subconscious, which then leads into your top three goals, your top three dreams, your manifestation, your visualization. You've got to really keep your mind going in the right direction and it all starts. And this is how you do it. That that's how you start to start changing your character. You see, recovery is about just bad behavior, not living by spiritual principles, not living by the true you, not living by your character traits, your character strengths, not let me repeat that not your bullshit character defects. That's why 12 step rooms constantly get it wrong. It is about developing your character strengths, because, because you're the opposite of your character defects are not your character strengths, that's, they're not. Um, because when you start developing stronger character and you start developing your character strengths, guess what? That's the magic your character defects either completely go away or they get minimized to a very, very small degree and your life starts to change. Because that's what we want. We want you, you to change, we want you to live your best life, we want you to embrace every 24 hours. But it all starts with character. So it's straightforward.

Speaker 1: 11:09

And why people fail? Because they don't do the work. They're lazy, they procrastinate, they get stuck in their depression, their boredom, their bullshit, all of it. Addicts have to be pushed and that's why the other reason why 12-step rooms fail because there's no one pushing it. It's all driven by each individual. Each individual has to find the motivation to stop their addiction and to start recovery. And most people it's just enough just to stop, to go to some meetings, to read some literature, and that can be enough.

Speaker 1: 11:51

And when I tell people that's not enough, you deserve more. You deserve recovery, you deserve your best life. The only way to do that is it's like everything You've got to get into the gym. You've got to go to church. You've got to go to therapy, do some or some type of emotional work with a recovery coach. You've got to start praying and meditating. You've got to slow down. You've got to work hard at your job and your business. You've got to make money. You've got to develop better relationships with your spouse, with your boyfriend, girlfriend, with your kids and your parents and your best friends. You've got to do this. It's all. Relationships are more work than anything else, but they're also the most fulfilling. So that is how you recover Straightforward, three-step process.

Speaker 1: 12:44

But to really truly understand this, I would encourage you to work with someone you want, someone that has a lot of experience like me, over 25 years, I live this stuff, I breathe this stuff. The steps, the steps, the way I wrote them you can even talk about the original 12 steps. I can talk about recovery, healing, growth. Those are the things. You deserve it and I want you to live your best life. And with that we are going to conclude this episode of the 1% in Recovery podcast.