Getting Carried Away... in a Good Way!

Justin studies with his entire family as he invites his wife and four children to the couch. Listen in as they discuss Proverbs 5. 

You can watch the video of this study at www.youtube.com/appianmedia

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Hi there, my name is Justin Dobbs, and this is listen, my children, I'm a husband, I'm a dad, and I'm learning to do what a lot of you are doing, one of the most difficult but most important things I'll ever do, bring up my children to follow the father. Over the last several episodes, we've been walking through the first five chapters of Proverbs together, you, me and our kids. Listen, my children podcast is made possible by a donation from the Oliver family, we're thankful for their generous support of Appian medius content. If you or your organization is interested in helping to fund content like this, please contact us through our website at Appian Media dot org. Well, today, my family is going to be joining us, Lindsay, my wife of 12 years and our four kids. This is a conversation about Proverbs five that we had in our living room. So if you have a Bible, you can open up the Proverbs five as we talk about getting carried away in a good way. So we are going to keep talking about problems, but we're at a very special chapter and it's Proverbs Chapter five, I tell you about where you stand to have wisdom. Yes, most of proverbs is sort of like a father talking to his son. So but if you have more questions, can you can you raise your hand for me? Ok, thank you. All right, now we're going to be in Proverbs five and we're going to all together work through this passage together. Proverbs five is a very special chapter in your right, NamUs. It is a father talking to his son, but it's about a really tricky problem. OK, so I'm going to go ahead and read through all of this one. But you just follow along, if you can, in your Bibles. OK, ready. Proverbs five, verse one. My son, be attentive to my wisdom. Incline your ear to my understanding that you may keep discretion and your lips may garden knowledge for the lips of a forbidden woman. Drip, honey, and her speech is smoother than oil. But in the end she's bitter as wormwood, sharp as a two edged sword. Her feet go down to death. Her steps follow the path to she'll. She does not ponder the path of life. Her ways wander and she does not know it. And now, oh, sons, listen to me and do not depart from the words of my mouth. Keep your way far from her and do not go near the door of her house. Lest you give her honor, Your Honor to others and your years to the merciless. Let strangers take their fill of your strength and your labors go to the house of a foreigner. And at the end of your life you groan when your flesh and body are consumed and you say How I hated discipline and my heart despised your proof. I did not listen to the voice of my teachers or incline my ear to my instructors. I'm at the brink of utter ruin in the assembled congregation. Drink water from your own sister, flowing water from your own well should your springs be scattered abroad. Streams of water in the streets. Let them be for yourself alone and not for strangers with you. Let your fountain be blessed and rejoice in the life of your youth. A lovely deer, a graceful no. Let her breasts fill you at all times. Delight be intoxicated. Always in her love. Why should you be intoxicated? My son with a forbidden woman and embrace the bosom of an adulterous for man's ways or before the eyes of the Lord. And he ponders all his past. The iniquities of the wicked ensnare him, and he's held fast in the cords of his, and he dies for lack of discipline, and because of his great folly he is led astray. Thank you for raising your hand, sweetie. What is that? What is this thing you should induce? Intoxicated. Yeah, that intoxicated. So this is a really fun chapter and it's really it's really challenging. It's really important, but. The father is telling his son that there are two ways of living. OK, and we talk about Proverbs is sort of taking one thing and laying it down to say the other, so that you can look at something in a new way. And this is full of things that are laid down beside each other. But the first thing just just a minute. The first thing is to know that there are two ways of living. There's one way where you try to get secret. Good. And it's not a good thing at all because you don't want anybody to know about it, because really it's not good at all. The other way is to enjoy the good that God gave you. And wisdom helps you to see the good that God gave you. And so Jubilee Intoxicate now usually intoxicate is a bad thing. It's is when you lose all control, when you lose all control. Well, you to sort of imagine we were in a car, OK, and all of a sudden. The brakes don't work. Ah, yes, big crash, big mess, dangerous, right? You lose all control, all of a sudden the brakes don't work. And I we're just going, yeah, yeah, this is a disaster waiting to happen. Yes, I did. So losing control is not a good thing unless unless it doesn't matter. And there's one way where you can lose control. And it's a wonderful, beautiful thing. And we'll talk about that in a second. But first, let's kind of look here at Proverbs five together and figure out what in the world is he talking about? When is it ever a good thing to lose control? What would it ever be a good thing to let your brakes go out? Well, there is a good thing he's saying, son, pay attention. And he says, first, incline your ear. Now, what does it mean to incline your ear, Linden? Means listen. Yeah, it means listen. But an incline is when you sort of slant something. So what you're saying is you turn your ear to me, say, give me your ear, give me ear so I don't take your ear off to you, you know, but that is sort of the idea, as he's saying, pay close attention to listen really well. It's like turn your ear to me. There are lots of ways to turn your ears. You can listen to lots of people, but the father saying, son, please listen to me. I've got something super important for you to hear. So listen, listen really close. You should always listen to your father, even if it's not important. Well, and hopefully the fathers are telling the children something that is important, that we're using our time well, to teach you important things. And this is this is one of those really important things because there is a really dangerous lady out there. And she doesn't look dangerous, do you believe do you remember we talked about the mouse trap with the honey? Mm hmm. The mouse sees the honey, doesn't see the trap and goes, oh, honey, we're cool peanut butter. And, oh, and this is exciting stuff and cheese and all of a sudden, dead mouse. Now this lady, she looks delicious. Her lips. Trip putting her speech is smoother than oil, but in the end, it says she's sharper than a two edged sword. Can you imagine trying to snuggle up? Oh, wait, hold on. Wait, wait, wait a minute. Can you imagine snuggling up to a two edged sword? Or it cuts you up so bad. So this lady, she looks good, but in the end. Oh, it'll kill you. Is death now for men? That's a real problem, is there are things that you think will be good and fun, but they're not. And one of them is women that don't belong to you. God made women to look really beautiful to men. And that's a wonderful, beautiful thing. But you've got to be really careful because there are women that don't belong to you now. Mommy, Mommy and I, we go together and that's a wonderful, beautiful thing. So if I want to hug mommy, that OK, if I want to kiss Mommy, is that OK? And you know what? I can take all the breaks out, I can go and kiss her and hug her, all I want to hear in this course, I want to race course. No breaks, just. And God says that's a really, really good thing. That's a really good thing. He says, you go ahead and you just get intoxicated. Usually you just get full up and just carried away with it. Oh, so good. It's sort of like turn on the music and you just dance and dance and dance all you want to. I can't stop dancing and you can't stop. You need to stop dancing. You just. Wow. It's good. And he sort of pictures it like like a stream of water or a fountain and you can just drink and drink and drink and drink all you want to, but there's some fountains that you ought not drink from. There are some things that you are not sharing. And so when it's a woman that you're forbidden, she's not yours, she doesn't belong to you. You stay away. God made a man and a woman in marriage to be a wonderful, beautiful thing, but. There are deadly things out there that want to carry us away from that wonderful, beautiful thing, so for women and for men, you've got to be awfully careful. And it's not just about a husband and wife relationship. Did you know that folly, which is foolishness, not obeying God, can lead you into all sorts of secret things that aren't good for you. You know, you can imagine like this, OK, you, me, imagine this, imagine imagine that mommy and daddy are not here in the house with you were outside working or something, and mom and mommy is making dessert and it's baking in the oven. And I was going to be good. Ask them what good is going to be like one of mommy's best desserts, like the chocolate peanut butter fudge brownies that she'd make all for cupcakes or cupcakes or chocolate chip cookie monster cookies or no good answer any of mommy's desserts. And they're going to be so delicious. And and it's making any other and you can smell it and it's going to be delicious. But then you look over the snack box and you say, you know, there's some popcorn there and a snack box and there's some chips and there are some crackers. And I'm hungry right now. And you just eat and you fill up and you took it and you didn't ask permission. And then I can tell you that and at dinnertime, you won't be hungry and mom is going to pull those brownies out of the oven with a cupcakes or cookies or any dessert, and she pulls them out and you go, Oh. Now, are any of those dessert's things, Snax, things, cracker's things that you got or any of them as good as Mommy's desserts? Probably not, not even close. And so you snuck in. You got this other stuff because you couldn't wait and enjoy the good thing. God has really, really good things for us to enjoy. If we'll follow his wisdom and sin and folly and foolishness says I can give it to you right now. But it's never as good and it always leads well here to lie to death, to death. So don't try to cheat, listen to God's good and wait for it and be a wonderful, wonderful thing. Yes, I must say that you may keep this good in your lives and good. No need for any lips for Betty. Well, mean honey. Yep. And her this is smaller. They aren't. But in the end she is bigger as one show as a two edged sword. So what are you asking me. Oh no. What can get sick. And I understand it's nice but then I just I don't understand like a.. And some things look good and they're not good. Some things look good and they're not good, and this idea of keeping discretion, your lips mangled knowledge, sometimes you've got to keep telling yourself your lips, you have to keep talking to yourself and telling yourself the truth, because are all these other things that are trying to tell you, do this, do this, it'll be great. And you've got to remind yourself, know, God's wisdom says this. So don't look at just the way things look. Wisdom gives us insight to look through and see the way things really are. Does that make sense to kind of see past them, the butter, the peanut butter, the honey, the cheese and see the trap? Forget about all the cheese and honey. You think you see the chap? Yes, because do you think that mouse thinks the cheese is worth it after he's been caught? Now, that mouse isn't thinking a thing. It's dead. So you could do away, but it probably didn't even get any the at all. Yeah, so. So see the trap? Yes, Alija, I started kind of look I thought it was similar to poison. Like you would put poison in people's drinks, like their wine, their gin. Sin is really tricky. Sin doesn't say, hey, look at me, I'll kill you. Sin doesn't do that. Folley doesn't do that. It puts itself in something sweet. Yeah, something delicious. And you go, oh, that'll be good. And then you die. So you've got to pay attention. Not everything that looks good really is good business. But when in an evil cane, it's that feeling good. So it's. Yeah. Well, maybe, yeah, there are lots of places in the Bible where people thought things were good and they weren't good happens all the time today. So I don't know. Is everything you want to add to this about what these two ways of living. I just like how in the end, he talks about self-control and discipline, how we're not necessarily having to make these decisions right now, but we are having to practice this self-control and the discipline so we can make these wise decisions later. When you make yourself do what you're supposed to do, then you're making it possible for you to have the good later self-control hard. It means choosing to do what's the good thing, not just what you feel like, but choosing to do what you know is right. You can get, you know, God, God will reward and he'll bless. Yes. Things a little more and realize when the man who can't like my first years and God said that he would have done everything and that he didn't want that he wanted that money, like now that's a good connection. Yeah. So in Matthew 19 with the rich young man and Jesus said, sell everything you have, give it to the poor and come follow me and you'll have treasure in heaven. Yeah, he wanted it now instead of waiting for it for later. It's the same principle here in Proverbs five when you look at something, think, oh, that's good, you got to stop and say, but is it really good? And wisdom teaches us to look at the real good God given. So let me slow down this kind of. Wrap all this up. Well, let's wrap all this up in Proverbs five, we've got two ways. One is what looks good and one is what is good, one is secret and you feel bad for doing it and it'll destroy you. And one is just the good that God promises. Wisdom teaches us to see the real good, kind of like Mommy's brownies and enjoy that and don't sneak off on these other things. Sin. Sin always takes more from you than you thought it would, and it never gives you as much good as you thought it would. And so let's just enjoy the good that God has given us. Now, how about we wrap up? We wrap up. There's a lot to talk about here in Proverbs five. But let's wrap up and let's say prayer, asking for God's help to give us wisdom here. Ok, Father, thank you for our family and thank you for your wisdom. Please and bless Elijah and Amos and Linden and Jubilee and Mommy and me and help us to see the good that you want to give us, that we can get carried away and enjoy freely the many blessings that you promise. Help us to see through sin. Help us to see through folly, to look at it for what it really is and we'll stay away from danger. We know that your words that your wisdom is for our good. Please protect us and help us to to walk in your ways and not be destroyed because we didn't control ourselves. We love you. Thank you for loving us so much that you gave us wisdom that you gave us Jesus to show us how to do this. Well, help was to follow him and his name. We pray and thanks. Well, thanks for joining me for that conversation in Proverbs Chapter five. Not everything is, as it seems, foolishness, sin, temptations. They come at us in different ways and they try to hide who they are. Sin really doesn't want us to see through it. Not everything that looks good is good, but wisdom gives us insight, helps us to see through the lies in the fog of temptation. Now your parents are going to be able to see some dangers better than you will. And wisdom teaches us to depend on the wisdom of other people. And that's part of why God gave you parents. They can protect you from danger and with God's wisdom, they can show you the blessings that God wants you to enjoy, especially as you get older. Now, parents, let me give you a little peek behind this episode that I think you'll appreciate. Proverbs five is an intimate conversation between a father and a son. So this would have been an easy conversation to have with Elijah. It's a conversation that we've had before, the latest 10. And so we've talked through these points. But this isn't something that we began to teach Elijah when he turned 10, nor is it something that we began to teach at age six, the age that Amos is instead at age appropriate levels. We've been teaching our children all along the principles that are found in Proverbs Chapter five and Proverbs five. And the wisdom that's there is part of what we do as a family all the time. The world wants to get at our children. It wants to teach them that these things that are actually really bad for them are really pleasurable and really good. And it's constantly feeding lies to our family. Lies about what is good, lies about what is pleasurable, lies about sex, lies about marriage. And the truth is that our children need to hear it from us first and often because the Bible teaches us often about these principles. In Proverbs chapter 23 and verse 26, we read that the father says, My son, give me your heart and let your eyes observe my ways. For a prostitute is a deep pit. An adulterous is a narrow. Well, see, our job as parents is to get the hearts of our children. Satan is busy. The world is busy trying to get their hearts and it is often at them and is constantly sending them information today about what's true and what's good. And it's it's wrong. So we need to get their hearts and we're asking our children, let let me keep those hearts safe for you for a while, because there are real dangers like first Teven prostitutes, these forbidden women, these forbidden desires, and it's trapping a lot of people. I'm convinced if we start with our children at an early age, at age appropriate levels, we can save them from a lot of heartache and we will always be able to save them from trouble. But as we introduce this kind of language into our families, have conversations like Proverbs five as a family will help equip them to feel safe having those conversations with us even when they do fail. What this does is it makes an easy passage to individual conversations with Elijah, with Linden, with Amos, with Jubilee when they're comfortable because they see us talking about it as a family. And Lindsey, my wife, she's in on that conversation to these are real difficulties that we all struggle with. But for whatever reason, one of the lies that Satan feeds us is that these are things we need to struggle with in secret. In private, the family is a safe place. We can talk about these things openly and then is our children trust us with their hearts. We can lead them away from trouble and we can guide them to the good things that God promises us, the things that he really wants us to enjoy. They are good things that God has stored up for us in his wisdom. Again, that doesn't ensure our children will never stumble or they never fall. We do. We struggle. We fail. We succumb to sin. But we can come back and we have these conversations again and we can recognize this is the safe relationship in which I can figure this out. Now, this wraps up our conversations through Proverbs five, and I've really enjoyed going through this with you. There are so many more things to talk through in these scriptures, but I hope this gives you some encouragement to keep doing what you do with your families or maybe to start continually spending some time together in the word. Thanks for joining us in this first season of Listen My Children. There have been a lot of hands in this and a lot of prayers that have been offered. I'd welcome any kind of questions, comments, feedback. Suggestions of things that you're doing that are working, if you'll visit our website at Appian Media dot org.