{"version":"1.0.0","segments":[{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1.23,"endTime":3.99,"body":"Hi, I'm Jason Ramsden"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1.23,"endTime":3.99,"body":"and I believe we can all work on"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":3.99,"endTime":6.81,"body":"leading a more positive and"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":3.99,"endTime":6.81,"body":"intentional life. And this show"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":6.81,"endTime":9.93,"body":"details my journey by sharing my"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":6.81,"endTime":9.93,"body":"learning stories and"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":9.93,"endTime":12.36,"body":"conversations with guests. If"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":9.93,"endTime":12.36,"body":"you want to lead a more"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":12.36,"endTime":15.39,"body":"intentional life focus on being"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":12.36,"endTime":15.39,"body":"the best you possible. Please"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":15.39,"endTime":18.63,"body":"subscribe today. Now, let's get"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":15.39,"endTime":18.63,"body":"into today's episode."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":19.86,"endTime":22.89,"body":"Hello, my positivity posse."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":19.86,"endTime":22.89,"body":"Welcome back to another edition"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":22.89,"endTime":27.03,"body":"of positivity on fire. I am your"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":22.89,"endTime":27.03,"body":"host, Jason Ramsden and today"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":27.09,"endTime":31.11,"body":"we're talking about the illusion"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":27.09,"endTime":31.11,"body":"of control. And to get your mind"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":31.11,"endTime":34.02,"body":"right I'm going to start us off"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":31.11,"endTime":34.02,"body":"with a quote today. I can only"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":34.02,"endTime":39.3,"body":"control myself, my actions, my"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":34.02,"endTime":39.3,"body":"work ethic and my attitude that"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":39.3,"endTime":43.29,"body":"comes from Ali Krieger, US"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":39.3,"endTime":43.29,"body":"National Women's soccer team"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":43.29,"endTime":46.41,"body":"from back in the day and current"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":43.29,"endTime":46.41,"body":"Orlando pride forward. And I'm"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":46.41,"endTime":49.83,"body":"gonna say that quote one more"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":46.41,"endTime":49.83,"body":"time, I can only control myself,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":49.86,"endTime":54.27,"body":"my actions, my work ethic, and"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":49.86,"endTime":54.27,"body":"my attitude, which is a perfect"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":54.27,"endTime":59.22,"body":"primer, a perfect lead in to the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":54.27,"endTime":59.22,"body":"illusions of control. Now I know"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":59.22,"endTime":62.01,"body":"you may be saying yourself,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":59.22,"endTime":62.01,"body":"listen, I am in control, I'm"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":62.01,"endTime":65.85,"body":"always in control j, this is"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":62.01,"endTime":65.85,"body":"what I do. I take control of my"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":65.85,"endTime":69.51,"body":"life. It's no, I'm not talking"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":65.85,"endTime":69.51,"body":"about you being in control of"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":69.51,"endTime":72.66,"body":"yourself. That's what I want to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":69.51,"endTime":72.66,"body":"talk about today. The illusion"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":72.66,"endTime":76.95,"body":"of control is believing in the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":72.66,"endTime":76.95,"body":"fact that you have control over"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":77.07,"endTime":80.52,"body":"other things. You have control"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":77.07,"endTime":80.52,"body":"over people, you have control"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":80.52,"endTime":83.61,"body":"over the workplace, you have"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":80.52,"endTime":83.61,"body":"control of how your day goes,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":83.64,"endTime":87.51,"body":"how your plans go, where your"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":83.64,"endTime":87.51,"body":"life is headed. The truth is,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":87.54,"endTime":92.91,"body":"that is an illusion. 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But"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":111.63,"endTime":116.67,"body":"psychologists say that when you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":116.67,"endTime":120.96,"body":"are constantly trying to control"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":116.67,"endTime":120.96,"body":"the situations constantly trying"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":120.96,"endTime":124.47,"body":"to be in control of every single"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":120.96,"endTime":124.47,"body":"thing in your life, it leads to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":124.53,"endTime":129.81,"body":"unproductive stress. Because it"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":124.53,"endTime":129.81,"body":"often puts us into constant and"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":129.81,"endTime":134.25,"body":"extended fight or flight mode."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":129.81,"endTime":134.25,"body":"To put it bluntly, it exhausts"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":134.25,"endTime":137.76,"body":"our nervous system, and just it"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":134.25,"endTime":137.76,"body":"leaves us wiped out. It leaves"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":137.76,"endTime":142.47,"body":"us jittery. It leaves us craving"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":137.76,"endTime":142.47,"body":"an end to what's going on in our"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":142.47,"endTime":145.83,"body":"life, because we spend so much"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":142.47,"endTime":145.83,"body":"time trying to control it. How"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":145.83,"endTime":149.22,"body":"many times have you been in a"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":145.83,"endTime":149.22,"body":"situation where you are"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":149.22,"endTime":151.83,"body":"projecting about something"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":149.22,"endTime":151.83,"body":"that's going to happen? The next"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":151.83,"endTime":154.29,"body":"day, maybe you have a meeting"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":151.83,"endTime":154.29,"body":"with your boss, maybe you have a"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":154.29,"endTime":157.89,"body":"meeting with somebody that is on"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":154.29,"endTime":157.89,"body":"your team, perhaps you're going"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":157.89,"endTime":161.19,"body":"for an interview, perhaps you're"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":157.89,"endTime":161.19,"body":"getting ready to fly and what"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":161.19,"endTime":165.06,"body":"you do, you run through these"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":161.19,"endTime":165.06,"body":"worst case scenarios over and"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":165.06,"endTime":168.78,"body":"over and over in your head,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":165.06,"endTime":168.78,"body":"thinking that perhaps you can"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":168.78,"endTime":173.19,"body":"predict what may be the outcome"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":168.78,"endTime":173.19,"body":"that will happen or maybe when"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":173.19,"endTime":177.12,"body":"it'll happen. And you play it in"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":173.19,"endTime":177.12,"body":"your mind over and over and over"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":177.12,"endTime":180.51,"body":"again. Rather than just sitting"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":177.12,"endTime":180.51,"body":"here right in the moment in"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":180.51,"endTime":183.6,"body":"preparing yourself for those"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":180.51,"endTime":183.6,"body":"events, you are preparing for"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":183.6,"endTime":185.94,"body":"yourself for something that may"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":183.6,"endTime":185.94,"body":"or may not happen."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":186.96,"endTime":189.99,"body":"In short, you're trying to be in"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":186.96,"endTime":189.99,"body":"control, but it's just an"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":189.99,"endTime":194.64,"body":"illusion of control. Now I get"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":189.99,"endTime":194.64,"body":"it, we like to attach ourselves"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":194.64,"endTime":199.32,"body":"to outcomes, we like to push for"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":194.64,"endTime":199.32,"body":"things that happened in a"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":199.32,"endTime":203.37,"body":"certain way we want to walk to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":199.32,"endTime":203.37,"body":"the beat of our own drum, we"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":203.37,"endTime":207.51,"body":"want to have things going"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":203.37,"endTime":207.51,"body":"according to our own agenda. 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Things happen"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":215.88,"endTime":221.37,"body":"when we let them happen when we"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":221.37,"endTime":225.87,"body":"allow them to happen when we"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":221.37,"endTime":225.87,"body":"open ourselves to being able to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":226.08,"endTime":230.13,"body":"be thoughtful about what could"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":226.08,"endTime":230.13,"body":"happen, as opposed to trying to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":230.13,"endTime":233.46,"body":"control every single element of"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":230.13,"endTime":233.46,"body":"a day, a week, a month or a"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":233.46,"endTime":238.02,"body":"year. Now if you're a regular"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":233.46,"endTime":238.02,"body":"listener to this show, you know"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":238.02,"endTime":241.59,"body":"that I'm a big proponent of"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":238.02,"endTime":241.59,"body":"meditation, I'm a proponent of"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":241.59,"endTime":246.36,"body":"mindfulness and mindset, believe"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":241.59,"endTime":246.36,"body":"that mindset is a way to kind of"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":246.36,"endTime":251.34,"body":"get ourselves focus in the right"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":246.36,"endTime":251.34,"body":"way as we go through life. And"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":251.34,"endTime":255.39,"body":"so for those of you who struggle"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":251.34,"endTime":255.39,"body":"to be in control of things,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":255.54,"endTime":260.04,"body":"where it feels like you're"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":255.54,"endTime":260.04,"body":"constantly on the hamster wheel"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":260.04,"endTime":264.48,"body":"going around and around and"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":260.04,"endTime":264.48,"body":"around, let me share with you a"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":264.48,"endTime":270.33,"body":"few things where the importance"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":264.48,"endTime":270.33,"body":"of letting go of control could"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":270.33,"endTime":275.22,"body":"certainly help you. Now you may"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":270.33,"endTime":275.22,"body":"know the name Deepak Chopra is a"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":275.22,"endTime":278.97,"body":"prominent alternative medicine"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":275.22,"endTime":278.97,"body":"advocate. He's the author of"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":278.97,"endTime":283.2,"body":"metta human, unleashing your"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":278.97,"endTime":283.2,"body":"infinite potential. But what he"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":283.2,"endTime":288.21,"body":"says is that one of his"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":283.2,"endTime":288.21,"body":"principles that he stands by,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":288.45,"endTime":293.52,"body":"when it comes to being mindful,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":288.45,"endTime":293.52,"body":"is that you need to completely"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":293.52,"endTime":298.23,"body":"detach yourself from the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":293.52,"endTime":298.23,"body":"outcomes. He doesn't have a goal"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":298.23,"endTime":299.97,"body":"or a hope on whether or not"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":300.0,"endTime":304.62,"body":"Not things that he doesn't feel"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":300.0,"endTime":304.62,"body":"like things that he will do in"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":304.62,"endTime":309.03,"body":"his life will have a positive"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":304.62,"endTime":309.03,"body":"change. No, he simply chooses to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":309.03,"endTime":313.23,"body":"share what's on his mind to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":309.03,"endTime":313.23,"body":"share his ideas with those who"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":313.23,"endTime":317.88,"body":"are interested in learning about"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":313.23,"endTime":317.88,"body":"them. And it's independent, he"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":317.88,"endTime":321.27,"body":"says it's independent of hopes"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":317.88,"endTime":321.27,"body":"and despair, whether or not to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":321.27,"endTime":324.6,"body":"make a difference. And I love"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":321.27,"endTime":324.6,"body":"that mindset. I love that"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":324.6,"endTime":327.81,"body":"thinking, because that is"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":324.6,"endTime":327.81,"body":"exactly what I am trying to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":327.81,"endTime":332.58,"body":"bring to you each and every"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":327.81,"endTime":332.58,"body":"Saturday is that, trying to get"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":332.58,"endTime":336.66,"body":"you to understand that if you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":332.58,"endTime":336.66,"body":"let go of control, if you let go"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":336.66,"endTime":342.36,"body":"and let life happen to you,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":336.66,"endTime":342.36,"body":"rather than trying to impose"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":342.69,"endTime":347.67,"body":"what you believe, should happen"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":342.69,"endTime":347.67,"body":"in your life, on to it, you're"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":347.67,"endTime":351.6,"body":"going to find yourself in a much"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":347.67,"endTime":351.6,"body":"better spot. So today, I have"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":351.6,"endTime":356.85,"body":"for you five things that you can"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":351.6,"endTime":356.85,"body":"help kind of losing control."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":356.91,"endTime":359.7,"body":"This comes from a Fast Company"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":356.91,"endTime":359.7,"body":"article. And you know, I'm"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":359.7,"endTime":361.83,"body":"always gonna bring you some"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":359.7,"endTime":361.83,"body":"research. So what I'm talking"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":361.83,"endTime":365.58,"body":"about, but what I find"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":361.83,"endTime":365.58,"body":"fascinating about these five"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":365.58,"endTime":369.36,"body":"things, is it's pretty simple,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":365.58,"endTime":369.36,"body":"right? The tactics that you can"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":369.36,"endTime":373.14,"body":"use in your life, to remove that"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":369.36,"endTime":373.14,"body":"control that you're trying to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":373.14,"endTime":376.74,"body":"impose upon it are fairly"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":373.14,"endTime":376.74,"body":"simple. You just need to get"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":376.74,"endTime":379.47,"body":"your mind wrapped around, get"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":376.74,"endTime":379.47,"body":"your mindset headed in the right"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":379.47,"endTime":382.65,"body":"direction, and get yourself"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":379.47,"endTime":382.65,"body":"focused on making that change."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":382.65,"endTime":386.07,"body":"Now, I know I talked about it"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":382.65,"endTime":386.07,"body":"here on the show before,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":387.12,"endTime":391.2,"body":"the challenge of change is"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":387.12,"endTime":391.2,"body":"difficult. Sometimes we look at"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":391.2,"endTime":394.38,"body":"it. And we're afraid to change,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":391.2,"endTime":394.38,"body":"we're afraid for what it means"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":394.38,"endTime":398.4,"body":"in our life, we're afraid to let"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":394.38,"endTime":398.4,"body":"go of control. And oftentimes,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":398.82,"endTime":403.38,"body":"you wonder whether or not you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":398.82,"endTime":403.38,"body":"have the courage to change. And"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":403.38,"endTime":406.32,"body":"all I'm saying is you need the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":403.38,"endTime":406.32,"body":"courage to take the first step"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":406.38,"endTime":410.4,"body":"towards changing. So here are"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":406.38,"endTime":410.4,"body":"those five things. Number one,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":410.73,"endTime":414.6,"body":"identify your triggers. So if"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":410.73,"endTime":414.6,"body":"you're in a place right now,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":414.6,"endTime":417.87,"body":"where you can stop, where you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":414.6,"endTime":417.87,"body":"can have a pen and paper without"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":418.02,"endTime":420.84,"body":"causing any harm to anybody"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":418.02,"endTime":420.84,"body":"else, this is what I want you to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":420.84,"endTime":426.69,"body":"do. Write down those things that"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":420.84,"endTime":426.69,"body":"trigger you when you feel you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":426.69,"endTime":431.7,"body":"need to control things. In my"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":426.69,"endTime":431.7,"body":"life control for me is always"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":431.73,"endTime":435.33,"body":"about being a little obsessive"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":431.73,"endTime":435.33,"body":"compulsive around the way the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":435.33,"endTime":438.75,"body":"house is kept to making sure"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":435.33,"endTime":438.75,"body":"that there's a place for"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":438.75,"endTime":443.37,"body":"everything and everything is in"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":438.75,"endTime":443.37,"body":"its place. That's something that"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":443.79,"endTime":446.43,"body":"I like to control, because it's"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":443.79,"endTime":446.43,"body":"something I can have control"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":446.43,"endTime":450.0,"body":"over. And what triggers me are"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":446.43,"endTime":450.0,"body":"when things a mess, when there's"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":450.0,"endTime":452.76,"body":"piles of things everywhere"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":450.0,"endTime":452.76,"body":"things are left behind, or"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":452.76,"endTime":455.1,"body":"people don't push in a chair or"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":452.76,"endTime":455.1,"body":"clean up after themselves."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":455.1,"endTime":458.07,"body":"That's a trigger for me. So"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":455.1,"endTime":458.07,"body":"there's an example for you. So"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":458.07,"endTime":459.99,"body":"go ahead. And if you need to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":458.07,"endTime":459.99,"body":"press pause and write down your"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":459.99,"endTime":461.76,"body":"triggers. Go ahead and do that"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":459.99,"endTime":461.76,"body":"now."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":463.29,"endTime":465.99,"body":"Okay, do you have them? Read"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":463.29,"endTime":465.99,"body":"them over? What What did you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":465.99,"endTime":471.36,"body":"come up with? Are there things"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":465.99,"endTime":471.36,"body":"that perhaps you realize now"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":471.48,"endTime":474.39,"body":"that are triggers for you, I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":471.48,"endTime":474.39,"body":"give you example of what was the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":474.39,"endTime":477.24,"body":"trigger for me, put those"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":474.39,"endTime":477.24,"body":"someplace, put them someplace"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":477.24,"endTime":479.85,"body":"where you can remember to reach"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":477.24,"endTime":479.85,"body":"for them, put them in your"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":479.85,"endTime":483.39,"body":"phone, write them on a piece of"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":479.85,"endTime":483.39,"body":"paper, put them in your your"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":483.42,"endTime":486.72,"body":"notebook, your purse, whatever"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":483.42,"endTime":486.72,"body":"it may be, whatever you carry"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":486.72,"endTime":490.56,"body":"with you regularly, hold on to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":486.72,"endTime":490.56,"body":"that, that you know what's going"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":490.56,"endTime":495.45,"body":"to trigger you to have this"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":490.56,"endTime":495.45,"body":"desire to control things. Number"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":495.45,"endTime":498.72,"body":"two on the list, do a mental"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":495.45,"endTime":498.72,"body":"dump of your feelings, let's"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":498.72,"endTime":503.13,"body":"just just get them out of your"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":498.72,"endTime":503.13,"body":"head, get them down. The need to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":503.13,"endTime":507.06,"body":"control sometimes is a reaction"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":503.13,"endTime":507.06,"body":"to unpleasant feelings. So go"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":507.06,"endTime":510.3,"body":"ahead, take those emotions right"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":507.06,"endTime":510.3,"body":"there. They're difficult to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":510.3,"endTime":516.63,"body":"regulate. You may be in a place"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":510.3,"endTime":516.63,"body":"where you are trying to suppress"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":516.63,"endTime":520.53,"body":"emotions, don't let them go."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":516.63,"endTime":520.53,"body":"Right? Once you kind of dump"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":520.53,"endTime":524.4,"body":"those out, put them on the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":520.53,"endTime":524.4,"body":"table, if you will, you get this"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":524.4,"endTime":528.24,"body":"kind of sense of ease a sense of"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":524.4,"endTime":528.24,"body":"calm that comes over you. But"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":528.24,"endTime":532.56,"body":"what happens is that when you're"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":528.24,"endTime":532.56,"body":"trying to control things, we"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":532.56,"endTime":536.01,"body":"keep the emotions inside we"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":532.56,"endTime":536.01,"body":"repress them, we push them down."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":536.31,"endTime":539.55,"body":"And what that does to us, all"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":536.31,"endTime":539.55,"body":"that does is build into that"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":539.55,"endTime":543.09,"body":"rabbit wheel of stress and"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":539.55,"endTime":543.09,"body":"anxiety and"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":544.23,"endTime":548.52,"body":"irrational emotional outbursts."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":544.23,"endTime":548.52,"body":"Because we're trying to control"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":548.52,"endTime":551.97,"body":"a situation and we can't we take"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":548.52,"endTime":551.97,"body":"all the stuff, we put it down"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":551.97,"endTime":554.4,"body":"inside and the next thing you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":551.97,"endTime":554.4,"body":"know we're exploding at somebody"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":554.4,"endTime":558.45,"body":"who doesn't need to be exploited"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":554.4,"endTime":558.45,"body":"that that's not a way to go"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":558.45,"endTime":563.97,"body":"through your life. Number three,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":558.45,"endTime":563.97,"body":"employ some distance. So"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":563.97,"endTime":568.89,"body":"sometimes, when we are out there"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":563.97,"endTime":568.89,"body":"trying to control other people's"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":568.89,"endTime":572.13,"body":"thoughts and actions, I get it,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":568.89,"endTime":572.13,"body":"we can't, you know, you know,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":572.13,"endTime":576.51,"body":"deep down you can't, but you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":572.13,"endTime":576.51,"body":"still try to do that. Right? So"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":576.51,"endTime":579.96,"body":"for example, you may have a"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":576.51,"endTime":579.96,"body":"friend that always tells"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":580.23,"endTime":585.27,"body":"inappropriate jokes or makes"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":580.23,"endTime":585.27,"body":"inappropriate comments, and they"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":585.27,"endTime":588.45,"body":"might even still do it after"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":585.27,"endTime":588.45,"body":"you've had the courage to ask"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":588.45,"endTime":591.78,"body":"them to stop doing it. You may"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":588.45,"endTime":591.78,"body":"even get into a disagreement"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":591.78,"endTime":595.65,"body":"with that friend. So what are"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":591.78,"endTime":595.65,"body":"you gonna do? employ some"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":595.65,"endTime":600.0,"body":"distance? Sometimes it's easier"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":595.65,"endTime":600.0,"body":"to employ distance than"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":600.0,"endTime":605.25,"body":"Continuing to try to control a"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":600.0,"endTime":605.25,"body":"situation that, yes, the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":605.25,"endTime":609.39,"body":"illusion of control that you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":605.25,"endTime":609.39,"body":"have no control over. When you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":609.39,"endTime":613.8,"body":"don't employ that distance, what"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":609.39,"endTime":613.8,"body":"happens, right, you play things"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":613.83,"endTime":618.69,"body":"over and over in your head, you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":613.83,"endTime":618.69,"body":"start to remember the things"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":618.69,"endTime":621.99,"body":"that they did to you, you start"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":618.69,"endTime":621.99,"body":"to remember, perhaps, in your"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":621.99,"endTime":626.52,"body":"head, why they did it to you,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":621.99,"endTime":626.52,"body":"you perhaps wonder why they did"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":626.52,"endTime":630.48,"body":"it to you, you don't understand."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":626.52,"endTime":630.48,"body":"And when you don't give yourself"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":630.48,"endTime":637.5,"body":"that distance, that then sparks"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":630.48,"endTime":637.5,"body":"more controversy, more hurt more"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":637.98,"endTime":641.79,"body":"fights. And so you just really,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":637.98,"endTime":641.79,"body":"again, employing some distance"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":641.82,"endTime":645.66,"body":"is a pretty good strategy. When"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":641.82,"endTime":645.66,"body":"you're trying to control someone"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":645.66,"endTime":648.87,"body":"or something that you can't"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":645.66,"endTime":648.87,"body":"control. Number four on the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":648.87,"endTime":652.35,"body":"list, choose to deal with it in"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":648.87,"endTime":652.35,"body":"the future, just put it aside,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":652.44,"endTime":656.58,"body":"it's okay to yourself, hey, not"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":652.44,"endTime":656.58,"body":"right now, anxiety, not right"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":656.58,"endTime":660.72,"body":"now stress, I hear you, I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":656.58,"endTime":660.72,"body":"acknowledge that you exist. But"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":660.72,"endTime":663.48,"body":"I'm going to put you over here"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":660.72,"endTime":663.48,"body":"for now, I'm going to put you on"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":663.48,"endTime":665.79,"body":"the side, I'm going to write you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":663.48,"endTime":665.79,"body":"down on a piece of paper, I'm"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":665.79,"endTime":668.46,"body":"going to come back to you later."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":665.79,"endTime":668.46,"body":"And I'm going to continue"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":668.46,"endTime":674.94,"body":"working with my life right now,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":668.46,"endTime":674.94,"body":"I am going to set aside time for"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":674.97,"endTime":678.75,"body":"worrying. So that could be a"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":674.97,"endTime":678.75,"body":"great strategy as well is if you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":678.75,"endTime":682.98,"body":"take a moment of your day, or a"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":678.75,"endTime":682.98,"body":"moment of your week, where Okay,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":683.04,"endTime":684.48,"body":"here's my worry our"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":685.71,"endTime":689.46,"body":"it's at a time or a place just"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":685.71,"endTime":689.46,"body":"for me to kind of worry about"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":689.46,"endTime":691.86,"body":"the things I need to worry"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":689.46,"endTime":691.86,"body":"about. And when it's over, it's"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":691.89,"endTime":697.08,"body":"over. Let it go. Drop it and"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":691.89,"endTime":697.08,"body":"move on. You're never going to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":697.08,"endTime":700.05,"body":"find an answer to your worries,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":697.08,"endTime":700.05,"body":"it's going to be hard to find"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":700.05,"endTime":702.78,"body":"any answer to your worries,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":700.05,"endTime":702.78,"body":"especially if you're trying to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":702.96,"endTime":705.33,"body":"control things you have no"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":702.96,"endTime":705.33,"body":"control over and you just"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":705.75,"endTime":708.54,"body":"relentlessly worry about them."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":705.75,"endTime":708.54,"body":"But set some worry time aside."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":709.65,"endTime":714.21,"body":"And finally, number five, learn"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":709.65,"endTime":714.21,"body":"to see uncertainty as a part of"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":714.21,"endTime":718.83,"body":"life. Yes, we do it every single"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":714.21,"endTime":718.83,"body":"one of us does it. I do it"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":718.83,"endTime":723.78,"body":"myself. A perfect example of"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":718.83,"endTime":723.78,"body":"this is like when I go into a"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":723.78,"endTime":729.81,"body":"restaurant or I go into a"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":723.78,"endTime":729.81,"body":"building or if I go into a plane"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":729.84,"endTime":734.22,"body":"or train anything, whatever it"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":729.84,"endTime":734.22,"body":"may be, I am doing a what if"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":734.22,"endTime":736.68,"body":"scenarios in my head? What if"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":734.22,"endTime":736.68,"body":"this happens? What if this"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":736.68,"endTime":740.16,"body":"occurs? What's the closest exit?"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":736.68,"endTime":740.16,"body":"Can I see all the exits? Can I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":740.16,"endTime":744.42,"body":"see people coming towards me? I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":740.16,"endTime":744.42,"body":"have no idea where that come"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":744.42,"endTime":749.67,"body":"from. I jokingly make fun of it"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":744.42,"endTime":749.67,"body":"when I'm out with people and I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":749.67,"endTime":752.52,"body":"need to have my back to a place"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":749.67,"endTime":752.52,"body":"where I can see the door I call"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":752.52,"endTime":756.99,"body":"it the Lincoln complex. I do the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":752.52,"endTime":756.99,"body":"what ifs? What if we just"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":756.99,"endTime":760.11,"body":"decided you know what"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":756.99,"endTime":760.11,"body":"uncertainty is a part of life, I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":760.11,"endTime":764.7,"body":"have to accept that it's a part"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":760.11,"endTime":764.7,"body":"of life. It If I don't, it can"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":764.7,"endTime":769.74,"body":"make me unnecessarily miserable."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":764.7,"endTime":769.74,"body":"Because I'm always doing what"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":769.74,"endTime":772.98,"body":"ifs. Now, in my example, it's"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":769.74,"endTime":772.98,"body":"not always doing what else I'm"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":772.98,"endTime":776.34,"body":"doing in certain situations"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":772.98,"endTime":776.34,"body":"where I feel like I need to know"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":776.34,"endTime":780.69,"body":"how to get out of a situation."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":776.34,"endTime":780.69,"body":"But what if you just said to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":780.69,"endTime":781.89,"body":"yourself, you know what,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":783.21,"endTime":787.44,"body":"I can't control life, I can't"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":783.21,"endTime":787.44,"body":"control what happens. I can't"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":787.44,"endTime":792.15,"body":"control other people, I can only"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":787.44,"endTime":792.15,"body":"control how I interact with the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":792.15,"endTime":796.02,"body":"world around me, I can only"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":792.15,"endTime":796.02,"body":"control my own attitude, my own"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":796.02,"endTime":800.49,"body":"work ethic, I can only control"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":796.02,"endTime":800.49,"body":"how I go about my business, I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":800.49,"endTime":805.32,"body":"can't control anything else, or"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":800.49,"endTime":805.32,"body":"anyone else. I would say to if"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":805.32,"endTime":810.21,"body":"you if you can't if you struggle"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":805.32,"endTime":810.21,"body":"with control, if you struggle"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":810.21,"endTime":814.35,"body":"with the ability to let go. And"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":810.21,"endTime":814.35,"body":"as a good friend of mine says"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":814.35,"endTime":817.26,"body":"let go and let God you may not"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":814.35,"endTime":817.26,"body":"be religious, but that's a great"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":817.26,"endTime":821.19,"body":"saying is that reach out for"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":817.26,"endTime":821.19,"body":"support. Find somebody to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":821.19,"endTime":824.07,"body":"connect to know that you're not"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":821.19,"endTime":824.07,"body":"alone know that there are people"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":824.07,"endTime":825.36,"body":"who can help you through."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":826.92,"endTime":829.71,"body":"times when you feel like you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":826.92,"endTime":829.71,"body":"have to control certain certain"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":829.71,"endTime":833.37,"body":"situations. Reach out to someone"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":829.71,"endTime":833.37,"body":"you value and trust and then"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":833.37,"endTime":837.39,"body":"talk about how you're feeling."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":833.37,"endTime":837.39,"body":"Talk about what it is that you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":837.39,"endTime":841.56,"body":"feel like you need to control"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":837.39,"endTime":841.56,"body":"and search for answers on how"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":841.56,"endTime":844.89,"body":"you can kind of free yourself"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":841.56,"endTime":844.89,"body":"from that. And as you start to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":844.89,"endTime":848.04,"body":"process more of the content of"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":844.89,"endTime":848.04,"body":"the show, I would just ask you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":848.1,"endTime":853.38,"body":"to ask yourself, what would"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":848.1,"endTime":853.38,"body":"happen if you let go of control?"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":853.95,"endTime":857.91,"body":"What's the worst thing that"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":853.95,"endTime":857.91,"body":"could happen to you in your"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":857.91,"endTime":862.41,"body":"life, if you let go of control?"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":857.91,"endTime":862.41,"body":"If you step back from the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":862.41,"endTime":865.89,"body":"situation, if you elevated"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":862.41,"endTime":865.89,"body":"yourself 30,000 feet into the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":865.89,"endTime":869.4,"body":"air, and you were able to kind"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":865.89,"endTime":869.4,"body":"of look down on what was going"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":869.4,"endTime":872.79,"body":"on. And you could rationalize"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":869.4,"endTime":872.79,"body":"looking at yourself and looking"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":872.79,"endTime":876.66,"body":"at a situation and say to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":872.79,"endTime":876.66,"body":"yourself, gosh, that person down"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":876.66,"endTime":878.91,"body":"there, they actually can't"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":876.66,"endTime":878.91,"body":"control the outcome of what's"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":878.91,"endTime":882.63,"body":"going to happen over there. So"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":878.91,"endTime":882.63,"body":"why are they bothering it? Why"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":882.63,"endTime":884.85,"body":"are they Why are they going"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":882.63,"endTime":884.85,"body":"through the motions of trying to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":884.85,"endTime":887.88,"body":"do that? I can see from up here"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":884.85,"endTime":887.88,"body":"that it's totally stressing them"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":887.88,"endTime":889.44,"body":"out. So stop."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":890.67,"endTime":894.93,"body":"Say to yourself, what is the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":890.67,"endTime":894.93,"body":"worst thing that could happen if"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":894.93,"endTime":899.64,"body":"I let go of control of the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":894.93,"endTime":899.64,"body":"things that I cannot change in"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":899.64,"endTime":899.97,"body":"my life?"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":901.079,"endTime":906.479,"body":"My best advice for you to sum up"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":901.079,"endTime":906.479,"body":"this show is to let go loosen"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":906.479,"endTime":911.459,"body":"your grip and live your life. An"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":906.479,"endTime":911.459,"body":"example of this from my own life"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":911.699,"endTime":915.059,"body":"is this when my son was in"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":911.699,"endTime":915.059,"body":"school, especially in the early"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":915.059,"endTime":920.249,"body":"years now he could memorize"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":915.059,"endTime":920.249,"body":"facts like no one I knew, he"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":920.249,"endTime":924.509,"body":"could regurgitate, spit back"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":920.249,"endTime":924.509,"body":"anything that he read, when he"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":924.509,"endTime":928.679,"body":"got into eighth, ninth and 10th"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":924.509,"endTime":928.679,"body":"grade. Now it's the time when"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":928.679,"endTime":932.369,"body":"school becomes more about"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":928.679,"endTime":932.369,"body":"applying the information that"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":932.369,"endTime":935.969,"body":"you learn rather than just"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":932.369,"endTime":935.969,"body":"memorizing it. He started to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":935.969,"endTime":939.779,"body":"struggle, he lost his footing"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":935.969,"endTime":939.779,"body":"academically a little bit, now"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":939.779,"endTime":943.859,"body":"in my infinite wisdom, as the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":939.779,"endTime":943.859,"body":"Father and because Truthfully, I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":943.859,"endTime":946.799,"body":"saw him struggling in school"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":943.859,"endTime":946.799,"body":"like I had as a kid, and I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":946.799,"endTime":950.909,"body":"didn't want him to do that. I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":946.799,"endTime":950.909,"body":"pushed hard on him to achieve"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":950.909,"endTime":955.229,"body":"more. I've tried to control how"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":950.909,"endTime":955.229,"body":"he worked. And I was constantly"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":955.229,"endTime":959.549,"body":"constantly on him, truthfully to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":955.229,"endTime":959.549,"body":"the detriment of our"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":959.549,"endTime":963.299,"body":"relationship. And then somewhere"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":959.549,"endTime":963.299,"body":"in the middle of 10th grade,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":963.299,"endTime":968.189,"body":"something clicked for me. I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":963.299,"endTime":968.189,"body":"realized we only have about two"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":968.189,"endTime":969.989,"body":"more years at home together."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":971.07,"endTime":975.87,"body":"And for some reason, I don't"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":971.07,"endTime":975.87,"body":"recall exactly why. But for some"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":975.87,"endTime":980.94,"body":"reason, I decided to back off"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":975.87,"endTime":980.94,"body":"and let him find his own way."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":981.3,"endTime":986.43,"body":"And not surprisingly, he did."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":981.3,"endTime":986.43,"body":"And our relationship improved."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":986.85,"endTime":990.42,"body":"shocker, right, shocker that"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":986.85,"endTime":990.42,"body":"once I tried to stop controlling"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":990.42,"endTime":993.75,"body":"his life and focused on what I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":990.42,"endTime":993.75,"body":"could focus on, which was"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":993.99,"endTime":999.21,"body":"supporting him, and asking good"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":993.99,"endTime":999.21,"body":"questions of him, and being"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":999.33,"endTime":1005.24,"body":"someone who he could turn to as"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":999.33,"endTime":1005.24,"body":"opposed to turn away from things"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1005.24,"endTime":1009.62,"body":"changed, and they have been"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1005.24,"endTime":1009.62,"body":"amazing ever since. And what I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1009.62,"endTime":1014.51,"body":"didn't realize was in that"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1009.62,"endTime":1014.51,"body":"moment, in those 13 1415 year"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1014.51,"endTime":1019.61,"body":"old years, I could have done or"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1014.51,"endTime":1019.61,"body":"continued to have done serious"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1019.61,"endTime":1023.54,"body":"damage to our relationship, and"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1019.61,"endTime":1023.54,"body":"we couldn't have ever gotten"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1023.54,"endTime":1027.77,"body":"that back. So just think about"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1023.54,"endTime":1027.77,"body":"that for a moment. Think about"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1027.8,"endTime":1032.18,"body":"something in your own life that"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1027.8,"endTime":1032.18,"body":"perhaps resonates with you along"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1032.39,"endTime":1039.17,"body":"the lines of that story. And"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1032.39,"endTime":1039.17,"body":"just just remember, if you want"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1039.35,"endTime":1045.86,"body":"real control, drop the illusion"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1039.35,"endTime":1045.86,"body":"of control. Let life live you."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1046.28,"endTime":1051.11,"body":"Because it does. Anyway. Thank"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1046.28,"endTime":1051.11,"body":"you, Byron Katie, for that"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1051.11,"endTime":1055.01,"body":"amazing quote. As we get ready"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1051.11,"endTime":1055.01,"body":"to wrap up, I asked you this"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1055.01,"endTime":1058.88,"body":"question, what do you need to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1055.01,"endTime":1058.88,"body":"let go of control of in your"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1058.88,"endTime":1062.45,"body":"life, if you have the courage to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1058.88,"endTime":1062.45,"body":"share reach out to me at Jason"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1062.48,"endTime":1066.65,"body":"at positivity on fire.com, I'd"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1062.48,"endTime":1066.65,"body":"love to connect. I'd love to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1066.65,"endTime":1071.12,"body":"hear what you're working on. And"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1066.65,"endTime":1071.12,"body":"as we close this show, as I do"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1071.15,"endTime":1075.41,"body":"every single time, I just want"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1071.15,"endTime":1075.41,"body":"to thank you for being here. The"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1075.41,"endTime":1078.68,"body":"time that you commit to my show"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1075.41,"endTime":1078.68,"body":"as a fan, the time that you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1078.68,"endTime":1082.4,"body":"spend listening, you can't get"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1078.68,"endTime":1082.4,"body":"that back, you give it to me and"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1082.4,"endTime":1087.2,"body":"that means the world to me. And"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1082.4,"endTime":1087.2,"body":"always remember be well be"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1087.2,"endTime":1091.49,"body":"happy, be you and until the next"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1087.2,"endTime":1091.49,"body":"time. May your quest for"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1091.49,"endTime":1093.71,"body":"positivity begin today."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1095.93,"endTime":1099.89,"body":"For more of my positivity quest,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1095.93,"endTime":1099.89,"body":"follow me at underscore j y"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1099.89,"endTime":1103.94,"body":"Ramsden on Instagram tik tok and"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1099.89,"endTime":1103.94,"body":"Twitter. If you liked today's"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1103.94,"endTime":1106.76,"body":"episode, please give us a five"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1103.94,"endTime":1106.76,"body":"star rating and review on your"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1106.76,"endTime":1110.36,"body":"favorite podcast app or visit"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1106.76,"endTime":1110.36,"body":"pod chaser comm and search for"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1110.36,"endTime":1111.59,"body":"positivity on fire."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1112.61,"endTime":1115.67,"body":"Positivity on fire is a"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1112.61,"endTime":1115.67,"body":"production of impact one media"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1115.7,"endTime":1118.07,"body":"LLC All rights reserved."}]}