Get off the Hamster Wheel with Melissa Morris

Do you ever feel like a hamster on a wheel? 

Melissa Morris joins me today and she helps hamsters get off wheels!  She is a Business Operations Consultant who helps business owners save 5 hours per week by streamlining and automating their business using tools like Dubsado. She helps to free business owners from overwhelm so they can actually work ON their business and not just IN their business. 

Enjoy this candid, casual conversation about...

- navigating the seasons of our lives
- organizing and creating structure to provide more freedom 
- understanding when we need to break our own rules
- how to juggle all the things 
- and so much more.

Learn more about Melissa:  https://www.melissavmorris.com
Melissa's Automation Roadmap: https://www.melissavmorris.com/roadmap

Connect on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/followmelissavmorris
Connect on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/melissavmorris/
Connect on IG:  https://www.instagram.com/melissavmorris

Learn more about Carla:  https:/www.carlareeves.com/
Connect on IG:  https://www.instagram.com/carlasreeves/
Connect on LI: https://www.linkedin.com/in/reevescarla/
Explore Coaching with Carla:  https://bookme.name/carlareeves/lite/explore-coaching

Learn more about Carla:
Website: https://www.differentlyco.com

Get The Differently Journal:
https://differently.myflodesk.com/journal

Connect on Pinterest: https://www.pinterest.com/differentlyco/
Connect on LI: https://www.linkedin.com/in/reevescarla/
Connect on Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@differentlythepodcast

Go to https://differentlyco.com/events to get The Class schedule, sign up, and/or pass it on to a friend.  Come hang out and learn with us for FREE!

Book a Complimentary Strategy Call with Carla:  https://bookme.name/carlareeves/strategycall

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Thank you for listening!

Transcript

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SPEAKER_00 0:00

I'm Carla Reeves, and this is Differently, a podcast where we explore the ins and outs of what becomes possible when we're willing to think, do, and show up differently to the moments of our everyday lives. Do you ever just feel like a hamster on a wheel, busy going round and around? Life is full, but you're just ready for something different. You want to get off of that wheel, but you just can't figure out exactly how. Today on the podcast, I have the honor to have Melissa Morris as my guest. And she and I met in a business mastermind, and I instantly felt like I could talk to her all day. She helps hamsters get off wheels. Yep, it actually says that on her website. I love that. Her purpose is to work with women who are really, really good at what they do, but they don't have the time or energy or know-how to tackle and create systems and workflows in a way that gives them, saves them time and allows them to put their focus where it really needs and wants to be, both professionally and personally. And let me tell you, she was born to do this. One of my favorite parts of this conversation is when we get to see Melissa as a young girl and how this was always a part of her. I have always believed that there are clues in what we love to do as kids to what we can or will do in our lives as adults. Melissa is a business operations consultant. She helps business owners save five hours a week by helping them streamline and really automate their business using tools like Dipsado. She has an offering called the Automation Roadmap that you're going to want to check out in the show notes. And she's a gem of a person that pours her heart into everything that she does. We dive into so many different things from organizing to moving through the messy middle and the uncomfortable parts of our lives and work. We talk about breaking our own rules and how important that is. We talk about family and life and how just important it all is while also figuring out how to juggle it all and have good boundaries. We talk about the seasons of our life and how certain seasons call us to lean in, certain seasons call us to let go, and certain seasons call us to become something that we didn't know that we could be. So grab a cup of coffee and join Melissa and I as we talk like all the good things in life. Hey Melissa, welcome to differently. Hi, Carla. Thank you so much for having me on. I'm so excited to have a conversation with you today. Um Melissa and I met like, I guess just about a year ago, um, through a business mastermind group. And yeah, I'm just really excited to have you on the podcast and have you share your story. So let's start there. So why don't you just give us a sense of who you are and the season of life you're in and a little bit of the story behind what you do?

SPEAKER_01 3:24

Yeah. So I am an operations consultant and project manager for agencies. And I've been in business um a few years now. And I think like a lot of women in the space that we work in, after I had my second baby, I was feeling like I needed more flexibility, I needed a little more freedom. I wanted to make sure that I had a little bit more control over my schedule than what was being allowed to me in the positions I had. I actually worked in agencies for a number of years. And it was getting to where, you know, there were quick deadlines and quick turnarounds and we need an answer now. And I just was not interested in that anymore. And honestly, I even in that space, I remember thinking at, you know, a couple of the agencies I worked at that it didn't even have to be that way. I remember thinking that, you know, if we were more on top of things, if we had some better systems in place, we wouldn't have to feel like we were always in this very reactionary kind of mode. So I left my business or left the agency to start my own business. And um, that's really over the years where I've gotten really comfortable and landed is helping agency owners do what I saw such a need for in the agencies that I worked at, which is getting out of that very reactionary state, getting a better handle on workflow, getting a better handle on your clients and your timelines. And that's what I help agency owners with now. It's my goal to help them streamline, build good workflows, improve team communication. So ultimately, we are reducing the amount of time they have to work, but also increasing their profits because things are just running a lot, a lot more smoothly. So, as we've, as with all of us, it's been a bit of a journey, but I really feel like I've settled into that and I've really been enjoying the work I'm doing.

SPEAKER_00 5:27

I love that. So also bring a little shape to the rest of your life. I know you're a mom and you have young children.

SPEAKER_01 5:36

I do. So I have an eight and a six-year-old, and my husband is in the military. Um, so you're a military mom now. Yeah. So you can appreciate some of what um it's like to have someone you love actively involved in the military. So he's in the Army National Guard, and I think this also played a role in my decision and that desire for more flexibility, is less so now, but especially when the kids were, so I said they're six and eight now, especially when they were firstborn, up through when they were probably like probably really when COVID hit. He was traveling quite a bit and he was having some long hours, and I had two small children. And you know, unfortunately, we didn't have a lot of family support in the area. And so it was a lot. So I was really craving a little more flexibility, and that it was stressful too. If you're trying to work a full-time job and have these small children and a husband who's gone a lot, it was tough. And so when I started my business too, I actually started doing a lot of project work and I was working with business owners. I would come in and I would set up a tool for them or um do some consulting work. It was very project-based. I would get them saving time, get them on their way, and then I would move out of the business. And at that season of my life, that felt really good too, because I felt like I could turn on and off projects. If he was gonna be gone a lot and really busy, then I wasn't gonna take a project during that time. But if he was gonna be home and things were feeling a little calmer, then I could take on projects. And then now as the kids have gotten older, his work schedule has calmed down. He's shifted roles within the military on what he has to do and his travel has come. I've found I have a little bit more breathing room to go deeper with clients. And I feel like I have the capacity to show up for them in an ongoing way and be a little bit more available to them in an ongoing way than I did previously. Um, and of course, still while reserving that time to be a mom and spend time with my kids and be available for them. That's something I just knew was always going to be really important to me, is not only are sometimes we finding ourselves being pulled away from the ball game or dinner or, you know, not like physically, but also we don't want to be mentally like pulled away. Like we're at the gymnastics practice, but we're thinking about work and we're in our email, or we're at dinner and we're really distracted, and we're not paying attention to our significant other or our children because we're stressed out about the deadlines or the work. And and I'm not perfect. There are certainly busy weeks or busy days where I'm like, oh, I'm doing it. I'm really distracted. Uh, but I always have that intentionality to get back to where I'm able to be really present with my family and close the door on work for the day so I can transition and just be showing up for them. So I've I've definitely transitioned how I work with clients to accommodate the season of life that I'm in. In this season of life, to work with, you know, a few clients in a deeper way is feeling really good to me and making sure that I'm reserving that space to close the door though and say I'm done with work right now, and I would just want to focus and be really present with my family and my kids.

SPEAKER_00 9:19

I really like resonate with this idea of seasons in our life. And I think it's so important, um, especially as women, like to honor the seasons of our life because there are different seasons. And sometimes I know I found myself like trying to force certain things to look a certain way in a season that it just didn't fit. And um, you and I were talking before we hit record, you know, just about motherhood. And, you know, your kids are little, and mine are graduate, my youngest just graduated high school, and we're finding ourselves in a very different season of like, wow, like this is this job of like raising little humans, like is you know, complete in a certain sense, like this part of it, right? It'll never be complete and we'll always be a part of their life and always be their parents and all of that. But this stage is is complete. And we're like, you know, we're looking at the future, and I'm looking at my work and my business, and what do I want that to look like? And how is that going to shift and change as we're in this new phase of creating and you know, learning to um be parents instead of do parenting. And so, and I love that you did that too. I think these seasons call for reflection and adjustment and refinement. And to be able to navigate and move through those, I think is so important. Definitely.

SPEAKER_01 10:52

And I think what's important to look back on too, when you mention taking time to pause and reflection, I think especially women, especially, and then high-achieving women, we put this expectation on ourselves that we should be able to do it all and it should all look a certain way. And then when a season of life isn't allowing that, to not beat ourselves up about it and say, well, there are messy dishes in the kitchen sink and there has been laundry on the couch for a week. Um, and saying that's that's okay. Or, you know, that season in my life where I was taking projects and taking them somewhat sporadically when I had young children and my husband was traveling a lot. It was definitely hard to remind myself that that was of choice and not me failing to not have the, you know, 10K months and the six-figure, you know, years and the all the stuff we see on social media. I made a million dollars in a minute today, right? Like, and you can get bombarded by, you know, all of this crazy stuff and a six-figure business and six months and all of this. And I'm kind of like, oh, like I've been at this, I've been doing my own thing for, you know, maybe a few months at that point or a year. And I'm like, I'm getting some projects. And I had to really work to remind myself that this was of choice and that the people who were doing those things were maybe in a different space in their life. They maybe were making different choices, and those choices weren't bad, or those choices, those choices were just different, right? Um, and I was making a choice to grow very slowly at that stage in in my business because that is what felt good to me and my family at the time. But now that they're a little older and they'll just go and play and go off for a couple of hours, that has changed. But what's funny is I'm finding myself now when I am working more and they're off playing, trying not to say, like, well, this feels different. Maybe I should be with them more, or maybe they need more of, right? And it's and I think what's just important is not making it wrong, like knowing that there are going to be times where things feel a little different or look a little different. Um, and that's part of life and just not making whatever season of life you're in and the choices that you are making, don't make them wrong.

SPEAKER_00 13:19

That's so true. Uh, you made me think of like many times in my business when my kids were young. Like I, you know, I I could feel that I had my foot like hovering over the break, you know, of my business. Because for me, it was all about kind of honoring these values. And I had this fear that if I put the gas on too much, you know, that if my business was going to compromise values I had for the mom I wanted to be, and the wife I wanted to be, and the family I wanted to create. And so I think as an entrepreneur, for me, it has been about there's times where, you know, my foot is close to the break or on the break. And there's times where it's like, okay, I can put I can put on the gas a little bit here. And I I think that's the beauty of being an entrepreneur is you get to control that. And it was always important to remind myself that it's not just gonna take off. Like I always have say, and I can rope things back in and slow things down if I need to. So you mentioned um high achievers. And so do you typically work with high achieving women? Is it women and men?

SPEAKER_01 14:28

I work mostly with women who are building an agency. Um, they are often done-for-you service providers. And I think when they get in this space of being a service provider, they they pour so much into everything. They right, they pour everything into their family, to their lives, and then they end up doing that for their clients and their business as well. And so I think this desire to just show up in such integrity and with such a value and such um enthusiasm for their client, I think we just they have to be careful that they don't take that then at the expense of their own self-care, um, of then it starts creeping into family time and you don't even realize it. And those lines just start blurring and business can start taking over. And then they do kind of give themselves a hard time that they should be able to do it all, and that they can't, or the idea of maybe they've done something wrong in the business because they don't have enough time. Like the money's there, the revenue's there, clients are there, but they're feeling really exhausted, but maybe aren't ready to hire yet, or not really sure what that looks like. And I just love being able to show them that there is a way. And that way is a is something they don't often think about because it is a little more behind the scenes and can mean a lot of things to a lot of different people, but really it is operations and workflows. And when we can get some of that resolved from them, then all of a sudden what they had worked so hard to build feels better and lighter and it's not as heavy and it's not as difficult. And they realize that they can serve their clients in that big way and still have time for themselves. Because I think when you get to that space, you start to think the only way to show up and do this right and do this with as much value and integrity as I want to do it in, then it has to be almost at the sacrifice of my self-care or my family. And it doesn't. Like there definitely is a balance where you can show up with tremendous value, but still reserve time for yourself and your family.

SPEAKER_00 16:46

There's such a parallel between the work that you do with clients and the work that I do with clients. That what I love about that is it's it's, you know, we all carry this load and you're like this relief valve in that you can come in and build, you know, structures. And I want you to talk about what that actually looks like, but you can help them build these structures or systems that kind of alleviate some of that load so that they can then focus on the things that really matter. And I think I is that your why? Like, is that the why behind what you do for you?

SPEAKER_01 17:19

It really is. Um, uh, you know, as I mentioned, wanting that flexibility, wanting that ability to be really present with my family and feeling like I was more in control of my time was the reason I started my business. And I know it's the reason a lot of women start a business. And I want to bring them back to that. When things start growing and things start taking off, they feel like they are losing that. And then they feel like their clients are in charge, or maybe their team is in charge and it starts to feel frustrating. So I want to bring that back to them and I want to give them what they were looking for when they started their business, which was I can have a business, I can really serve clients, I can make money, but I don't have to run myself ragged or sacrifice my family or self-care to do it.

SPEAKER_00 18:08

Yeah. So tell us some of the ways that you do that for yourself, like in your life. How do you, what are your kind of go-tos for juggling life and work and kids and mom and all the things?

SPEAKER_01 18:23

So I definitely am good with boundaries. A lot of my client, not a lot, all of my clients know that they have 20, you know, I have 24 hours to get back to them. That delivering work is not same day. And depending on the size of the project or what the work entails, that could be 48 hours. It could be longer. And I make sure I communicate that really well with them. I think boundaries and good communication always go hand in hand and keeping that conversation open. So I just try to be really open and honest with my clients. I also vet my clients carefully because if I start getting red flags early on that there's somebody who's going to be a little bit more demanding or not understand that I am a mom first, then I know it's not a good fit. And and we'll part ways and I won't continue to serve them. So definitely setting good boundaries, good communication. And then I do I automate when I can at home too. And I run a very tight schedule, like, and not in a bad way to say tight schedule, but we have things very systematized at home. And we know between me and my husband. Yeah, like between me and my husband, we kind of just have a good routine on who's gonna make dinner and who's gonna clean up and what days we do laundry on and what days we don't do laundry on. And getting that really systematized can almost feel for some people like, oh, I'm so constrained, oh, I'm in a box. But it's actually really freeing because the mental bandwidth that it frees up is so good. Like it's like Friday is laundry day. Like Friday, I am just going to do every drop of laundry in the house. I even, it sounds silly, but I've even developed like a proper order. Towels and workout clothes always go last because they can sit in the dryer all week and it doesn't matter. Right? Like they're not gonna wrinkle. Yeah, it doesn't matter, right? Kids' clothes always go first because they're not, I'm not really concerned about wrinkling or rumpling up. First load is the kids' clothes that just gets piled on the couch. And then Saturday morning it's their job to fold their clothes and get their clothes put away. The next batch is like mine and my husband's clothes. I hang up things that would wrinkle right away. The rest sits until Saturday morning when we can fold. And then towels or maybe like some sheets, stuff that really isn't that big of a deal can go last. Because if we don't have time and it sits in the dryer, well, you know to find clean towels in the dryer this week. Or if they, you know, sit in a basket, right? And it doesn't matter. And then Saturday morning, like the kids will fold their laundry, me and my husband will handle the others, and at that point it's just folding. So it sounds like almost silly, but that like solid routine is just so good because we all have clean clothes, we all know the deal. The kids know that Saturday morning, that's that's their chore, that's what they're gonna get done. Um, we've also recently done meals, like I have uh pre-made, like ready, ready to cook meals that have been delivered. We are in a pretty busy season right now. My husband's kind of transitioning positions. Um, my business is you know doing well. We've got kids, we're planning to move. So we're in a bit of a busy season. And so because of that, we've started having meals that are ready to ready to cook, deliver to the house. So I always automate when I can and just create really good systems and routines for the house. And that that just makes it really easy. There's no fighting over who's gonna cook dinner or not gonna cook dinner or I did dishes last time. You know, there's just there's none of that coming right in.

SPEAKER_00 22:12

Like mental energy that you spend thinking about those things, like that's that's eliminated. I I've always believed that structure creates freedom. Like there is like you kind of resist the structure, but when you create a structure, then you have like all this freedom and space to be creative inside of it. So I don't think it eliminates creativity, I think it actually expands it. It's kind of contrary to what your mind wants to think. So have you always contrary? Yeah. Have you always been system oriented? And like, did your brain always work like this? Like, I want to know, like back to when you were a little girl. Like, was your brain working like this? Always. I love that. Like, give us a story. Like, what did that look like?

SPEAKER_01 23:01

Yeah, I was definitely like the little kid who was always cleaning her room or like organizing the play space. Um, people laugh at me because we'll go to a restaurant and we'll go out to eat. And you know, you have like the straw wrappers, so people start taking off their straw wrappers, and then like where the bread goes, I will like notoriously start organizing like the restaurant table. And I've used to get picked on about this when I was like in my early 20s. We're all at happy hour and I'm like tidying up where like the appetizers are, and I just don't even think about it. Like it's not a thought of like, oh, I'm gonna be efficient. It's it's just what I do. Like it just feels good to me because I know, oh, when this space is cleared and everybody can reach the appetizers and there aren't straw wrappers going around. Well, it just feels so much more relaxing and we just have so much more space and a drink isn't gonna spill. Like it's just what I just what I do. And I remember in school, I would always color code my subjects for school. So, like I always had like a red math folder and I always had a blue history folder. And so then when it was time for school, I always knew what folder to it just made life feel really easy to me doing these things. So it really was from a space of potential laziness. Like, I don't want to think about it, I don't want to have to spend mental energy on that. So I'm just gonna make it really easy on myself. So yeah, it's always just been I do it without even a thought. Oh yeah, without even a thought, I am constantly looking for a way to make something more efficient. Always.

SPEAKER_00 24:50

So amazing. So your work and your business is like a playground for you to be able to get in someone's brain and get in their business and look at all their processes and then make sense of those and organize those and systematize those. Like you created your own playground.

SPEAKER_01 25:06

I did, I did. It's uh it's my dream job actually. And unintentionally, like I it's funny because I wouldn't have thought that that was a job, or I didn't seek that out, but I I just landed with the the perfect job. So I took the Colby. So this is um a test. You get a series of numbers and it speaks to your mode of operation. And one of them is systems, like a person, certain people are just predisposed to work in that space and start creating systems and and organization. And that's definitely a big one for me. And I also physically enjoy organizing things, like kind of come back to the table at the restaurant, like cleaning it up, organizing in my house. I just find it so fun. I love to organize and make things tidy. And then you apply that in more of an abstract way. That's exactly what I get to do to businesses, is I hear their messy back end and how incongruent workflows are and there's gaps and drop-offs, and I just can so quickly start to see how to organize it. Yeah, I can just see it. And I'm like, oh, this is how we're gonna do it. And this is the tool we're gonna use to organize it, right? So, like, clickup is like the system's label maker. Like if I was to make it the intangible to the tangible, it's um it's just a way to keep things organized, and I just so clearly see it.

SPEAKER_00 26:39

And for people who might not know what clickup is, clickup, I I I know a little bit about clickup, but why don't you what it's other than the organizing label maker or whatever, what what is how would you describe ClickUp?

SPEAKER_01 26:52

So ClickUp is a project management tool, and project management tools are where you would keep track of the tasks that you need to execute a workflow. And this is also where you would assign those tasks to individuals, team members, to yourself. Um, and then also where you would be tracking due dates and potentially even tracking your own time. So it's a way to keep yourself on track and organized with the tasks that you need to execute.

SPEAKER_00 27:17

Yeah, awesome. So I am a uh organizing soulmate of yours because I love to organize. Like it it really is like a joyful thing for me. I love to organize things. I love I've done it since I was a little girl. I would rearrange my room all the time just to create new space and new energy. And I um I still that do that today. And I I feel the same way you do about my business. Like I get to like listen to a client kind of like put out all the emotional, you know, mental things that are cluttering up their world, right? And I can just, I can see clearly, I can organize sort of it all and help somebody kind of organize their mind so it's not so cluttered, it's not so life doesn't feel so confusing, they don't feel clear, and I can help them sort of organize their thinking and their actions and their behaviors so they all sort of move in alignment to what they're creating in their life. And so there are so many parallels in what we're doing in a totally different capacity. So tell me a little bit about like your leadership and entrepreneurship. Like where where are you, where is it causing you to grow? And how does that having your own business um and being an entrepreneur have you think about life, like how you do life differently because of that, right? Because it's kind of fairly still fairly new in your world.

SPEAKER_01 28:54

Yeah, so it's funny, I see this systems organization aspect has almost as much as it's a blessing for my business and the work I do, it can also feel like an obstacle sometimes because with every business, there are these messy middle periods where there's growth and maybe the systems haven't caught up to that growth yet, or there's a new service offering, and that process doesn't feel just perfect yet or completely seamless because I still have to navigate what the deliverables are looking like or what that experience is for the client. And that has been difficult for me to not want to have it mapped out and perfect and know what this is gonna look like before rolling it out, and having to just trust and be in that messy middle where maybe the process isn't perfect and the workflow isn't isn't really written down anywhere or isn't really explained, that definitely creates like even a degree of anxiety and discomfort for me. And so just having to be okay with that and know that that's the path to growth is been something I've definitely had to work on. And that's definitely a mindset thing that I've had to work on. And I can see that show up also in areas of my personal life as we're buying a house. I get to where I want to have all the answers. I want to know what it's all gonna look like. Are you gonna accept the offer? What how much is it gonna cost? When are we gonna right and wanting to really know what all of these things are? And that's just not always the way life is sometimes. And you have to just go with it a little bit. And so that's always a mindset thing that I have to navigate that it's okay if I don't have all the answers. And it's it's not super organized and super efficient because my brain just craves that. It really wants that, and it tries to impose that any chance it gets on whatever is happening in my business or my personal life. And so as I've grown, you know, gotten older, introduce kids, right? Like young children will will throw a wrench in the systems and organization of your life really quickly. Um, and I've I've had to be okay with that.

SPEAKER_00 31:21

I can so relate to that. Um, like just this idea of wanting things to be kind of tied up and organized, and clarity and and direction and a path of how it's all gonna lay out and go. And I think I think everybody listening can probably relate to that too. And life is life is messy, it's not always organized, and it's sometimes really important to like just allow it to be messy. I know right now in this season, like literally Shane just graduated like a week ago uh or last weekend, and like Monday, he's already like stressed about like not doing anything. And and we're we're in our house is feeling smaller than it has ever felt because he is so independent and he's so ready to be on his own, and we're all kind of in this like awkward space, like it's just feels awkward, and I want to fix it and solve it and plan it and organize it, and it's just not organizable at the moment, and so we just have to kind of be in the uncomfortable of it and love each other through it and know that it's not gonna be like this forever, and I'm gonna soak up every minute he's still here.

SPEAKER_01 32:40

But it's so hard, it's so hard when we can't organize and fix it. It's it's hard. It is. That was actually my like word of the year a couple years ago. I I was like, be messy. I told my husband when we were doing things, I was intentionally trying not to make it perfect and to to prove myself that it's okay. So the kids were probably this is when they were maybe like two and four around there. And it I was like, this is too much. I can't. I've got like two toddlers running around the house. He was working a lot, and I thought, well, if the goal is to be messy, then I'm reaching it. So let's make the goal. Let's really go. I'm achieving. That's just our goal. Like I am knocking it out of the park because things are really messy right now.

SPEAKER_00 33:32

I love that. I love that. It's like that's so creative and inventive. Like we get to invent the game we're playing, and so why not invent a game that has a little more ease and flow and fun and joy and you know, I love that. I think that's the beauty. Like that's why I love what I do, is and just in my own life is just that we get to we get to constantly be these entrepreneurs in our own life, creating and inventing what's next. And it's it's never stagnant, it's always changing in your marriage, in your home, with your kids, with your work, with your life. And and you get to you, there's a lot of creative ownership that you can take that can lighten it all up and make it a little bit more fun.

SPEAKER_01 34:17

Definitely, definitely. I was working with a coach, this was a few years ago, and um, I forget exactly how it came up, but she pretty much said something very similar to what you're saying. And, you know, she's like, You you can decide. Like you can decide what you're going to believe and what you're gonna do and what you're gonna do with your life. And I thought, oh my gosh, she's right. There, there actually is not a set of rules that we all you know what I mean, obviously outside of like actual law, but in terms of how we're gonna manage our day-to-day life or the people we're gonna spend our time with or how we're gonna do our work, that is our choice. And there's not a right or wrong way. It's what feels good to you. And when I started to really lean into that and say, well, what do I believe? And what am I holding true and what is important to me? It just gave me permission to release some of the, I guess, societal expectations or, you know, some of that fear of judgment. Because I thought, you know, this is how I want to do it.

SPEAKER_00 35:19

And I'm good with that. That's such a good exercise to kind of just examine your own rules because we all have these rules that got created probably when we were really young and we don't even realize they're there and that we're operating by them. But to just like sit back and kind of look at what are the rules that I'm living by, because I find with my clients and in my own life, a lot of times we've sentenced ourselves to like these rules that maybe made sense at one time, but they're totally outdated. They don't make sense, they're completely stressing us out and keeping us confined. And we have creative power to be able to change those or adjust those and realign those. And that's like that's where life gets can get really rich.

SPEAKER_01 36:02

Yes. And it's so powerful. And to come back to the conversation, you know, some of the business owners I work with in this high achieving will to do this well, I have to answer them right away and I have to go above and beyond. Those are rules that you have created. No one, no one else put those rules on you. And your clients didn't put those rules on you. Like a lot of the time, it's the business owner putting those rules on themselves, or they'll think, Oh, I really wanted to do this for them and it's not getting done, and now I feel bad. And I say, Well, did they ask you to do that? Is that part of the offer? Well, no. And I'm like, Well, then why do you feel bad? They don't even know this is like a task you've assigned to yourself and and you've assigned it to yourself, and then you're beating yourself up when you're not executing the task. Meanwhile, your client is delighted, like they are so thrilled with the work. So that's why I love to get really clear. Yes, like get clear on what your offerings are, get clear on what your workflows are, because then you know when you are living by the rules that you have created, they're clear. The client understands those. And if you've made rules that are too strict, change them. Let your clients know, but you can work to change them. And it may not be an immediate fix. There may be some clients who are not okay with the new rules. And then when their contracts expire, then then we bless and release and say it's not a good fit anymore. And then when we're onboarding new clients, we say, these are the rules, and because I've changed them and this is what feels good to me now. And you will find the clients who like those rules too, and they're happy to play those rules.

SPEAKER_00 37:41

That's right. And I think I mean that same advice you can apply to friendship and relationships in a little different way, right? Where it's like you you teach people how to be in a relationship with you, and sometimes we've done things for so long that don't work, but it's okay to teach people now like what's okay. You know, and you can do that in a really loving, kind way. So such good advice. So tell us, Melissa, what are you most excited or inspired about in your business and in your personal life right now?

SPEAKER_01 38:17

So I will tell you my personal life is our new house. I'm very excited about that. So it won't be until later this year we ended up doing new construction because the housing market is bananas everywhere, but it's been especially difficult here in Florida where I live. And I'm feeling really excited about that. The house we lived in before we moved. So we moved in May 2020. So, like right when the pandemic was hitting hard. And I loved my house, my my home that I lived in. We'd been there 10 years. It was the longest I'd lived in any house. I grew up in with a military dad, and so we traveled a lot. That was my home. That was the home I brought my babies to. So it was very difficult for me to leave that home. And under such insane circumstances with what was going on in the world. And then we moved here to the Jacksonville area, and we've been in a rental for just over two years at this point. And it's been hard because it didn't feel like ours. It always felt kind of temporary. Um, so we're, I'm just so excited to get into our home, start that new chapter in our life, really make it our own. The kids are so excited. They're feeling really a part of the process, which has been super fun that they're excited and they feel a part of it. Um, so that's definitely what has got me feeling very excited in my personal life.

SPEAKER_00 39:52

And you can go, you it's being built, so you can go and kind of see all the different stages, and the kids can see that too every weekend. Oh, every weekend we go.

SPEAKER_01 40:02

So much fun. And it has been so fun, especially since we are building, and they like I said, they really feel like they get to be a part of the process with us, and that's making it so much more special that they also are like taking such ownership and um getting to see it all come together. So it feels really feels like our family's home as as it's getting built. So I just can't wait to get in because even the the process has just felt really special.

SPEAKER_00 40:33

That's amazing. And how about on the business side?

SPEAKER_01 40:38

The business side has been very, it's been a very exciting year business wise. I have almost gotten to capacity with retainer clients where I'm in the process of hiring, growing the team. So I I was speaking from very current experience when I said I have to be okay with the transitions of life. Uh, not like dealing with it physically with a house, like in this transition of like, well, I don't really want to settle in here, we're gonna move. Um, but also in the business as I'm looking to onboard a new uh team member and looking at what that will do for my other account manager and how we're all gonna kind of come together. And I don't have all the answers yet because we're still early. I'm still early in that journey of bringing them on and introducing them to the other team member and getting us all settled. So it's it's uncomfortable the not knowing all the answers, but trying to be excited about it. And it's easier for the house. So I'm like, let's apply that. Let's apply that to the grow, the growing and the building that's happening in my business as well, and and make it feel exciting.

SPEAKER_00 41:57

I love that you do that. I often tell my clients that like you know how to do that over here, so let's just transfer that um behavior over here, like you already know how to do it, but sometimes we're just not doing it in another in one place, you know? So I love that you're doing that. Well, so as we close, is there anything that we didn't touch on that you wanted to touch on?

SPEAKER_01 42:23

Um, I don't think so. I've really enjoyed our conversation, and I think you ended with a good note there on what we can do really well in one space, let's make it apply to another. And when you said that, the first thing I thought was, like, oh yeah, like I really need to do that. And I think it's just harder sometimes in the business realm because that's also what I do, because I organize businesses and I make them efficient. So if there is a moment where mine's in a growth period and maybe a bit of a transition because new team members are coming on, reminding myself that I have to go through those same kind of bumps in the road along the way. And that's that's okay. And I, you know, ultimately when I think about it, it's probably gonna make me a better consultant because been there, done that, right? Like I've I've done that too. So solid advice.

SPEAKER_00 43:17

Yeah, and and you're these seasons, right? Like you're in this season of growth. And last night I gave a talk about kind of being on mission and and staying true to your mission through the all the ups and downs that occur inevitably. And one of the things I was asking them was like, what is your mission calling you to become? And I think like obviously, I mean, in your story, there there is something that your business in life is like calling you to become now. And I just invite everybody listening to kind of think about what season you're in and maybe a mission that you're on, and what is it calling you to become? And so good. I so enjoyed this conversation. I have one last question for you, and is just what does differently mean to you? Hmm, I love that you asked this question.

SPEAKER_01 44:15

And differently means to me kind of coming back to what we talked about of setting your own rules is I don't have to do what society says or what my neighbor's doing. And it's not even necessarily right and wrong. It's different, it's different. Like what works for your family is it's wonderful. And I'm glad that everybody in your family, and that's right, but that might not be what's good for my family. And it's not right, it's not wrong, it's different. And so I think being able to embrace that idea that maybe I'm doing life a little bit differently than other people are, that's okay. And it's working really well for us. And I hope what they're doing is working really well for them. I love that.

SPEAKER_00 45:01

Kind of finding your own rhythm and being okay with it. That's a judge.

SPEAKER_01 45:05

And being okay with it, which is the hard part, yeah, is is to release the judgment or the the thought that it's not enough or it's not the right way, that it doesn't have to be right or wrong, and it doesn't have to look a certain way. And it's it's good, that's okay, right? And and just letting go of that judgment and and expectations that I know I used to put on myself and sometimes still do, and a lot of people, especially women, I think do.

SPEAKER_00 45:34

Absolutely. Well, I'm so excited for your home and your growth and your business, and I'm so glad that we're in this mastermind together and that our paths have crossed. And I loved this conversation, and I know people listening are gonna really get some gems from your story and all that you shared. So thank you so much for being here and being willing to join me here.

SPEAKER_01 45:58

Oh, thank you so much for having me. I always enjoy talking to you.

SPEAKER_00 46:06

Thank you for tuning in to this episode of Differently. I hope it stirred your thinking, and I invite you to take one inspired action from something that stood out to you. If you want to hear more conversations like this, hit follow on your favorite podcast app. And if this episode could impact someone you know, please pass it along. Remember, new episodes drop weekly. See you next week.